All language subtitles for Evil.Bong.666.2017

- Devil, do you approve?

I did it all for you, well, mostly.

Do you like it?

Okay, all right.

Wel, ahem.

Welcome.

- Man, we thought you'd never open.

- You must have been waiting right outside the door.

- For like ever.

- Yeah, we tried to make it in time,

but the store had just closed.

- So we thought we'd just wait outside

until it opened again.

- It's been closed since 4-20. - Yeah.

- Last year.

Yeah.

- That's cool, we took a nap and shit.

- I don't remember this place being so scary.

What's up with all the spooky-kooky?

- I wanted this place to reflect my soul,

dark and scary as fuck!

And, you know, for Satan.

Um, yes?

You have a stupid question and, or a stupid comment?

- Yes.

- Then ask it.

- Why are you way hotter than you were before?

- Before what?

- Last time we were here, you were a douchy young dickhead.

And also, a bald asshole.

- Okay, firstly, those weren't me,

those were the previous owners.

I bought the place in a fire sale.

Like literally, it was on fucking fire.

I'm the new owner, Lucy Furr.

Oh, and FYI, I was never not hot.

- You're totally skirting the question, dude.

- Busted, your honor.

- The only thing busted around here is my ass

trying to reopen the store.

All new look, all new mark.

- I knew it, dude.

- I'm sorry, perhaps maybe there's something I could...

Let me rephrase that, what the hell do you guys want?

- We want to suck it up.

Smoke it up, get fucked up.

- Yeah, we want to get stoked up, chugged out, and, and...

What was that thing you said?

- Get high as a kite. - That's right.

- Well, that I can help with.

- Right on, evil woman, get us baked.

- And don't delay it.

- Enough with the rhymes, slimes.

You got money or not?

I knew it, be feet.

- He's the bank, skank. - That's right.

- I'm like Fort Cocks.

- Remind me never to make a withdrawal.

You know what?

It's not that you guys aren't good for it,

'cause obviously you are.

But I'm gonna do something I've never done before.

- Take a shower with a sumo wrestler.

- No.

No!

I'm going to be nice for once.

The first one is free.

- Yeah, spread that love, baby.

- Yeah, spread it all over.

- Oh, God, I'm talking about the weed.

The first toke is free.

- First toke? - No joke?

- I never joke, fuck that shit.

Fuck jokes.

Anyway, let me show you our specials.

You can't find them anywhere else.

I've searched the darkest, deepest places on earth

to find the most unique strains.

Places most fear to tread.

Many answered, but few return.

- The Congo? - The Amazon?

- The Valley. - Whoa.

- So what will it be, sirs?

I've got Ebee Kush.

Gingerweed.

And Bongzooka.

- They all look so, like, likable.

- I don't think I could ever choose.

Can we just, like, try them all?

- Look, I'm being nice here.

I'm not mother fucking Santa Claus.

- Okay, uh, lady's choice, then.

- Smart choice.

Well I just happen to have some Ebee Kush

packed and ready to go.

- Oh, bring it to Papa.

- You like it?

- Oh, that's smooth.

- This is the most rad weed ever.

- I know, just don't get it in your eyes.

- What?

- Oh, dude.

That packs a whammy.

Move, legs.

- Dang it.

Huh, that devil powder really worked.

Technically, he's dead,

but he could do my bidding for Satan's army.

- I'm back, mother fucker.

Bitch.

- What the actual fuck?

- You a lesbo? - No, why.

- 'Cause you done snatched me.

- Oh, that's gross.

Hey, you're like the knick-knacks on the shelf.

- Knick-knack paddywhack, shut your fuckin' mouth.

Those high-end statues were my last grand idea

to take over the world.

And I would have done it, too,

if it weren't for those meddling dipshits.

- Say what? - I'm Ebee, bitch.

- The evil bong?

- Yeah, weed's legal in most states now, so, not so scary.

- You done botoxed your brain, girl.

- Wait, Eebe's the name of the store.

- Ah, you're slow, but you do come around.

Save that giggling shit, don't work on me,

do I look like I got a desperate dick?

- Okay, what was that thing?

- I was stuck in Sexy Hell,

no thanks to that walking boner, Rabbit.

- Like the cute little fuzzy kind,

or that gross man I bought the store off of?

- There ain't nothing cute about Rabbit.

- Gotcha.

- I don't know how that cue ball did it,

but he somehow sucked me into his empty ass head.

Then, I took a wrong turn to a place called Sexy Hell.

- Sounds kind of hot.

- Girl, my bong water boiled all day and night.

- I mean, sounds so sexy.

- It's called Sexy Hell,

but you don't want no part of that shit.

Or maybe you do, you freaky ass.

- So by offering that hesher,

I opened the portal to Sexy Hell?

- Lord knows I've killed my share,

but no portal opened up because of it.

You did a nice number on that dude, by the way.

- Thank you, I love my work.

- That's it!

It wasn't just the killing that opened the portal,

it's that your nasty cooch was slobbering while you did it!

The more you kill, the bigger the portal,

so you and your gazungas can get through.

Bitch, you got some major fucking daddy issues.

But I can work with that.

- How so?

- Help me enslave the world.

- And you can help me sacrifice more people

so I can open a portal to Sexy Hell?

I want to see Satan, I'm like his number one fan.

- Pack your bag, bitch.

- Oh, yeah, they're packed.

- Who the fuck is this?

- Her name is LuAnne. - I'm Batty Boop.

- Stop trying to be Batty.

- Oh, but I am Batty.

- Batshit crazy, maybe, but you are not her.

- We ever see Junior Killjoy again,

I'm gonna break you in half.

- Oh, really?

- Take that to the bank.

- Nobody leaves Batty Boop in the corner.

And that's gonna leave a boop egg.

You can't lay me out like that.

I have stories to tell, I've got something to say.

Oh, oh, where am I?

Oh, hello?

Where's Killjoy?

Killjoy?

Where am I?

Boop.

- You just sit right there, leave it to me.

- Girl, knock yourself out.

You won't hear a peep from my ass.

- Today's my big grand opening.

There's so many victims, customers, whatever.

- Don't worry your tits, you'll make a killing.

- The ultimate glow cherry bombs.

Here's the turtle.

Turn it in, turn it in when you can.

It is showtime, don't miss it.

Come see the show tonight, it's open right above.

The show that's up top, you'll see it all.

You're gonna see the sword swallower, the fire eater,

the electric lady, the bearded lady.

- That boob-headed boob thinks

I'm gonna help her sacrifice people?

That's some shit right there.

Dead people are no use to me.

I need strong backs, and weak minds,

to pump full of my magic weed

so I can take over this damn place.

Gotta figure out a way, what to fucking do?

- Thanks, man.

- That's it?

- Happy now?

- Hardly.

- This ain't allowed here. - What the fuck.

- You perv. - Get out of here.

- That's false advertisement.

I'll get you in trouble with the law.

Serious.

- I told him it sucks.

- Yeah, so does your sign.

- Look, it's got a hole in it.

Maybe I should make an adjustment.

- Yeah.

- Care for a bat?

- No, thanks, I'm not hungry.

Finally, normal looking people.

- I love you.

- Oh, wait, I know you!

Oh, I know you!

You work with Killjoy.

Can you take me to him?

Can you show me where he is, please?

- We don't work there anymore.

We're out on the streets now.

- He the freaky fella who juggles the chainsaw?

- Yeah, can you take me there?

- No.

- I don't even know.

I forgot to boop, boop, boop, ugh.

Can you at least take me to the set?

- I still love you, but no.

- Where am I?

- Venice. - Feenis?

- Oh, Boop, I must have made a wrong turn at Ma's.

- Wrong turn at your anus.

- Don't talk about the woman I love that way.

- Boop.

- I hope I didn't just kill my only two customers.

It's you.

- In the flesh.

FYI, there can be a lot more of that,

if you know what I mean.

- I don't.

- Flesh, a lot.

- Yeah, I seriously doubt it, and uh, God, please don't.

- Just thought I'd put it out there.

- Okay, well put it back.

God, put it way back, perv!

- Huh?

- My face, hello, the thing that's talking.

- Oh. - eh.

- I don't like to bog myself down with details.

- What do you want?

- I just thought I'd drop by and see how it's going.

Big day, first day and all.

- Yeah, okay, you're the only person to walk in here.

If anyone asks.

- Well that's a good omen for any entrepreneur.

- Yeah, you know, actually I looked you up

at the Better Business Bureau, mm, not so much.

- Details, details.

- Ah, hello, ladies, let me know if you have any questions.

- Namaste. - Namaste.

- Rabbit wanna grab it.

I think I'll peruse your merchandise.

- Is there something you like?

Is there something you wanna try that I have?

- Maybe.

- Sentences, ladies, they're the backbone of communication.

Okay, you're showing me that, why?

- We heard it gets you free weed.

- Tits for tokes.

- Yeah, that worked with the old disgusting owner,

but uh, I kind of have two of my own.

- Ladies, if I may,

your actions were commendable,

and so are your hooties.

And I want you to know that was all not for naught.

- You have free weed?

- Not exactly.

- Then what, exactly?

- Rabbit wanna grab it. - Screw you.

- Grab yourself, dickhead.

- Talk about mixed messages.

- I don't know, seemed pretty clear to me.

Didn't you have a partner?

- Larnell?

- Yeah, what happened to him?

- He was accidentally dispatched.

- You mean like you sent him to a satellite location?

- Well he is certainly in a cosmic place.

- Okay, and when's the space cadet getting back?

- He's not coming back ever.

- Oh, it's cute.

Oh, I want one.

Jeffy, will you buy me something?

Buy everything, I want it, I want it, I want it.

- Welcome!

If you're actually here to buy something.

- I'm not a customer.

- Okay, then what are you?

- This is my lovely trophy, Versnatchy.

- The pleasure's all yours.

Don't smudge the mani, darling.

- I'm Jeff, I came to gloat.

Where's Larnell?

- You know, that's an interesting question.

I'm not really sure.

- Hi, lapdog, I mean, Jeff.

- Greetings, fool.

- Where's your owner?

- Grandpa's no longer with us.

- You mean he's--

- Yes, he's gone off on another adventure.

- Jeffy? - Hmm?

- Will you buy me something?

Please, please, please, please, pretty please?

- You like what you see?

- I like the best.

Do you have the best?

- I've got the fucking best.

Mm-hmm. - Oh.

- Hmm, does this come in blingy, whatever?

I'll want it, he'll pay.

- Larnell, where is he?

- Larnell's on a trip, a very bad trip.

- Shame, I wanted to rub my perfect life in his face.

- Hmm, what an asshole, kick a man while he's down.

- Right in the balls.

- Hey, let's give it a try, okay?

Oh, that's rich.

I want it.

- Anything, my dear.

- No, I want it.

I want it now.

- Well, like me, the lady gets what she wants,

so that's gonna be it for us.

Thank you for the opportunity.

Good luck with everything and have a nice day.

- Cute couple.

- It's all boopy.

- Step up, Madame Mystical will show you the way.

- You can show me the way?

- Always.

- Oh, please, lover girl, where's Killjoy?

Where the hell's Larnell?

- Who, what?

- Larnell, what the boop.

I meant, I don't even know what I meant.

- Never fear, Madame Mystical is here, and taking tips.

That's weird.

- Is, is, is that bad?

- Beats me, this is a lawn ornament from the dollar store.

But it must be trying to tell us something.

- Why is it so smoky?

- It can only mean one thing. - And that is?

- Eebe's Weed Dispensary, just opened up down the street.

- Can you point me the way?

- I'll take you there.

It's time for my break, anyway.

- Really?

Oh, you are a lifesaver, you really are.

- But we gotta get you out of those clothes

before they put you to work down here.

I know a place. - Okay.

- You're back?

- What do you mean?

We've never been here before.

- You were just...

Nevermind.

It's not gonna work here.

But, you know, there is something I'd like to show you.

May I introduce you to the Vapor Cup.

- What is it?

- It's the best vaporizer on the planet.

- What does it do?

- All you have to do it turn it on, pack it up, and vape it.

And the best part is, no one even knows you're doing it.

- Can I try?

- Fine, just let him.

I hate you.

- That's some high kick high, I love it.

- You like it?

- Futuristic.

- It's good, right?

I'll take that as a yes.

- We'll take two.

- Okay, let me just ring that up right here.

It's gonna be $199 each, anyway.

Oh!

Rabbit, I gotta go in the back and do something.

Think you can watch them for a minute?

Can you watch yourself, too, while you're at it?

God, I can't stand all these idiots!

- Everything's going according to plan, honey.

- No, it's just a bunch of cheap morons and derelicts.

I'm so gonna whack all of them.

- Oh, baby, just slow your roll, sweet ass.

You'll get your chance.

- But it's not like it was last time.

I can't get them separate enough to do the deed.

And worst of all--

- You found a conscience somewhere in those boobs?

- God, no, it's all those stupid questions.

I can't take it.

- Honey, that's customer service.

- No, I'm so gonna sacrifice all of them.

- Whoa, save your energy for when you need it.

And, bitch, you're gonna need it.

- You're right.

I just need to stay calm, I can do this.

- Now you're using your hair sprayed head.

Now go back out there and do your thing.

- Thanks, Ebee. - My pleasure, bitch.

- Hey, ladies, I got some killer weed in the back

if you want to try it.

Yeah, come on, totally safe.

Come in this back room.

- Can I try it? - No.

- It's strong enough for bald-ass orangutan,

but it's kind of made for women, so, sorry.

Oh, I needed that, I wanted to do that so bad.

- Can I--

- Wait, shh.

Oh, that was good.

I'm sorry, what were you saying?

- Where are the girls?

- Oh, they are gone, they are so far gone,

not that they were there to begin with.

Cock.

- Hey, put it in a jar, you've got customers.

- Welcome.

Can I help you?

- I don't know, I guess.

- Let me guess, you need something for your glaucoma.

- Not really.

- Okay, you just wanna get like super high?

- What he means to say is that he needs something

to make Johnny Johnson, Junior, become Mr. Johnson

until Principal Johnson says it's recess.

- That's what I meant to say.

- Uh, yeah, sure, okay.

This is it, then.

Perfect, yeah, try it.

- That works.

- Mm, how much? - $199.

- Mm-hmm.

- Worth every penny.

- Bye.

- Sarah?

- You know these people?

- Yes, uh, they're old friends of mine.

This is not Sarah, apparently, and this is Misty,

and this is Miss Lucy Furr.

- I don't suppose you came here to buy anything, either.

- The road to discovery led us here.

- Say what?

- We came here looking for some guy, I think.

- This guy?

Oh, you must be real hard up.

- You could say that again.

- But don't.

Are you Larnell?

- Au contraire, I'm Rabbit.

Larnell is--

- Larnell, Larnell.

- Gone.

- You mean forever?

- Start talking, buster.

- What topic are we addressing at this time?

- You know exactly what I'm talking about.

- Where's Larnell?

- Oh, that.

- Why do I keep saying that?

- Spill it, or we spill you.

- I can't bring Larnell back, it's too risky.

I run the risk of bringing back that Gingerdead asshole,

or she whose name must not be spoken.

- Gingerdead Man and Ebee?

What am I talking about?

- I was trying to be discreet, but,

yes, both of those buttholes.

- So he's never coming back?

And I'll never get back to the ship?

- Yes, and...

What?

He's so deep in the nothing head

that he's never coming back.

I wouldn't know how.

- Wait a minute, you mean the Evil Bong?

- Shh, the bitch who must not be named.

- Ebee.

- What's with you girls?

- Uh, you guys are supposed to be...

- Boop. - They need help.

- They need to go to the hospital.

- Hiya, dicks.

- I told you not to say his name.

- Fuck this shit.

- You're all looking a little pastry.

What, are you not happy to see me?

- Not really.

- We have some unfinished business.

- See.

You must be Sarah.

- I'm not Sarah, Boop.

I'm the real Batty.

Woo-hoo!

- Looks like you guys started the party without me.

- We definitely need to get them to the hospital.

- No way, the fun's just getting started.

- That's right, mother fuckers, Ebee's back.

- She likes to say that a lot.

- I told you not to say her name.

- Can't tell if you fuck buckets are surprised to see me,

or if that's just your normal, stupid faces.

- Oh, great, the poopiest party-pooper.

- Who do we have here?

The Ginger Little Dick Man.

How the hell did you get here?

- I whacked it deep into Sexy Hell

and jumped through a flaming pussy.

You?

- This set of tits attached to a pole dragged my ass here.

- Did you say Sexy Hell?

- Yeah, Sexy Hell, and that's where I'm going.

Even if I have to whack all of you to do it.

- Could you just whack me?

- Rabbit!

- Just kidding.

- Our chosen course is the only one to wellness.

- Huh?

- We're not going anywhere except for the hospital.

These girls are barely hanging on.

- Let me help you get it there faster.

Bon Voyage, tits, don't forget to write.

- How could you?

- You're a scone's throw away from getting it, girlie.

- Don't help that bitch, you pudding head fuck.

Dead ass's don't help me.

- Who fucking cares what you want?

I'm just happy to be killing again.

Makes me feel like a man again.

- Ha! You really are a dumbass.

- Donut test me. - Boop, boop!

- You're coming with me!

- Hey, hey, I'm not going back to that shit hole!

- Well, fuck, I was just getting started.

- This is not sexy, this sucks.

- Faith is the truth to divinity,

and for us, we shall overcome.

- What? - It's cool.

We'll figure it out.

- Boop!

- Sexy Hell is fucking rad!

- Bitch, could you be more of a sorority slut?

- Shut up, you're spoiling it.

- You don't tell me to shut up, I tell you to shut up.

- It's so sexy.

It's so sexy.

Ugh, it's the nuns.

- We are more than happy to leave you to your own devices.

- I'm sure there's so many devices here.

- Who dares harsh my bellow?

- I expected a little more from that voice.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what they all say.

Fuck you, too.

- That is no way to talk to a lady.

- Silence, man, come on.

- Who are you?

- I am Beelzebud, high priest of Sexy Hell.

Lord of deadness.

Ambassador of fucking delicate shit like that.

See what I mean.

- Beelzebud. - On your knees.

- Okay.

- I love that shit.

- Beelzebud, I'm your greatest disciple.

I kneel humbly before you.

- Really love that shit.

- To make you an offer.

- Prove your worth, ho.

Down here, ho is a compliment.

By the way, it's Sexy Hell.

- Hey, hey, no, no, no, no you don't, bitch.

You're not gonna offer me up to his ass,

'cause that's probably where I'll end up.

- Easy babe, exit only.

- What is she doing?

- What the hell are you doing?

- Will you be quiet for a second.

You're ruining my moment.

- Sorry.

- May I offer you these sacrifices?

- Sacrifice yourself.

Lord, sir, whatever, she, she would make so much better

of a sacrifice than we would.

- Don't get your panties in a wad yet.

Perhaps later.

This is Sexy Hell, we don't do sacrifices here.

- Thank Boop for that.

- We do really fucked up orgies, though.

Like really fucked up, they're gross.

- No, Boop.

- No sacrifices?

Don't you want to take over the world that cast you out?

- Yeah, I guess so, I've just been too busy banging

to get around to it.

You know, lots of banging around here.

This is Sexy Hell.

- Ebee is a conduit to the world above.

She can open a permanent portal.

- Interesting.

I'll get me an army of demons, rule with a hard dick.

It'd be Sexy Hell on earth.

Let's do it!

Oh, yeah.

- No, ew, ew, so, ew, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no.

- That's some hot shit right there, man.

- I've seen hotter.

- Man, what's with you?

I think all of them clothes be harshin' your hotness.

Sexy demon, why don't you help them shed their dirt

for the Beelzebud.

- No, no, no.

No, no.

No, no, hands, leave.

Don't touch me, don't touch me!

- Well I wasn't expecting that.

- Whoo!

- Damn, that shit pisses me off.

She was hella sexy.

- The portal, the portal.

- Hey, hey, hey, what the fuck now?

Oh!

- Oh, my God, you suck.

- I like the sound of that.

I'm thinking a sacrifice is on the menu for a change.

- Oh, at least it's not the other thing.

- After the orgy, of course.

This is Sexy Hell.

- Oh, no.

- Go get her.

- No, no.

Get off of me!

- Ah, shit, the girls are gone.

Looks like it's just me and you, dickwad.

- Wanna play Twister?

- No, fuck that, I'd rather grease ya.

- God damn, gonna toss my cookies.

Speaking of cookies, fuck you.

- Oh, well, well, well,

look what the cosmic vagina pooped out.

Now I can rid myself of the both of you.

- My ass you will, we need to work together.

- Fat chance.

Every time I see you macaroons it spells trouble

for old Gingy.

- That punk ass Beelzebud gonna do the nasty

to those bitches down there.

- Ah, who cares.

- Look, jelly dick, Lucy Furr is all up

in that devil's red ass.

They plan on opening that portal for good,

and kill every last mother fucker on earth.

- That's a problem?

- Sometimes I think that filling in your head

is full of shit.

Your mission is to get back down to Sexy Hell

and kill their ass.

- Wow, I'm just like Ram Dough.

- Vapor Cup.

Packed with the finest Ebee Kush.

- Well, this time it's war.

- Go get 'em, soldier.

- We may have just sent him on a one-way mission.

- He's no cream puff.

If anybody can do it, it's that crazy mother fucker.

- I guess we just wait.

- No time to sit on your dumb ass.

One way or the other, that big poontang is gonna open up.

We don't know what's coming through it.

We need a plan.

What the fuck you doing?

- To fight a monster, one must create a monster.

- Oh, I like that shit.

It tell you how?

- Weed.

Duh.

- Using only the finest weed on earth, we will create life.

- We need to get started.

The storm is coming.

- Right you are, mother fucker.

- Flour, brown sugar, yellow cake,

eggs, nuts, more nuts.

- And now for the final ingredient, Gingerweed.

This shit doesn't look like much.

How the fuck is that supposed to help us?

- Ready.

Time to plug him in.

Let's bake.

- Get that mother fuckin' monster, mother fucker.

Holy shit, mother fucking Gingerweed Man.

- Get the high! - Woo-hoo!

- Get the high!

Gettin' the high!

- I so want to kill you,

but I need Ebee to keep the portal open.

- Wait 'til I get out of this.

You're all gonna get a kick in the nads.

- Let's start the ceremony.

The ceremony of fucked up gross-ass orgy.

- That's kinky.

- Yeah, that son of a bitch is tight.

- Oh, God, what now?

- Yeah.

- Like where am I?

- What just happened?

- It's Sexy Hell.

- Honeybuns, I'm home, and this time, it's war.

- Whoa, man, that's harsh.

Why don't you just grease these two

and be done with it?

- You mean I finally get to wax Sarah?

- Who?

- Yeah, whatever, man.

They've been so unsexy since they've been here.

- It's been my life's work,

but would it be too easy?

What do you think, honestly?

- Just do your thing, man.

I want to get this gross-ass orgy started

so then we can go fuck her into the ground.

Oh, yeah.

Lie down, you.

- Nobody's killing us today.

- Or orgying us, either.

- We're getting out of here.

- Doesn't anybody knock anymore, man?

- Who the fuck are you?

- Your worst nightmare.

I'm Gingerweed Man.

I've been sent by Mom and Dad to save you.

- Mom and Dad?

- Rabbit and Ebee?

How is that even possible?

- Yeah, what the fuck is this shit?

- I believe in weeds, not words.

- I'm sending you back where you came from,

you fricking hippie.

- Come with Weed if you want to live.

- Donut cross me, asshole, LuAnne is mine.

- You, sir, must be weedinated.

- Mm, yeah.

- I really hate you bitches.

- Likewise, demon crotch.

Sic her!

- Oh!

- Cripes, man, what was in that shit?

- Me.

- I feel like I'm rising like a souffle here.

- To transverse the mission you must become one with it.

- What the fuck are you talking about?

- Oh, he's kind of lovable when he's not so doughy.

- Game face, LuAnne.

- Is this real?

Oh, why is that clown walking towards me?

What are you doing here?

Whoa!

Oh, danger, oh, shit, this is crazy,

this is very serious, Sarah, stop!

I mean, LuAnne, LuAnne, what the fuck name you go by.

Oh, God, get this away.

Oh, not on my dick.

Oh!

- Wow, I've never seen you like that.

- You know me, sometimes I get so

I don't even recognize myself.

- Cool, now that he's out of here

we can start that world domination game.

- What about the orgy?

- No time, babe.

- No, you promised me a gross-ass orgy.

- Chillax, man.

- We're just gonna get on out of here.

- Nah, man, you ain't going nowhere.

At least not alive.

- Now, see, that sounds cool.

- Everything sounds sexy coming from me.

- Yeah, yeah, it's Sexy Hell, we know.

- How about we settle this like things?

- What are you offering?

- Easy-weedsy, if I win, I take the girls home with me.

- And if I win, because I win?

- Then the girls stay here with you forever.

- Um, nah, not good enough, man.

- All right, and I will remain your prisoner for eternity.

- Not the words I want to hear.

- I don't know what you mean.

- We'll all be sexy.

- Now you're talking my language.

How do we settle it?

- How else?

An old-fashioned bake-off.

- Sexy Hell's yeah!

- Your turn.

- Weed or die.

- Not bad for a beginner.

- Blow them away, baby.

- Oh, man, that's gonna be hard to beat.

- Give it your best shot, Gingerweed Man, man.

- Come on, little Weedy, you can do it.

- Mm-hmm.

- Put a little power to it.

- How do we know who wins this thing?

- Looks like they're having some fun.

- Oh!

Dude.

- Holy shit!

- Oh, Weedy, I'm your biggest cheerleader.

- Oh, fuck.

- We're going, we're going, going, going, going.

Ah, love you, Weedy!

- Not sexy at all, man.

- I love you, Weedy!

Oh, I knew you could do it.

- Thank you for beweeding in me.

- But how do we get home?

- No problem, I have a telepathic link back home.

- Nice, make it so.

- Weed us out, Ma.

- How many do you think will make it back?

- Who fucking cares?

- Thanks, Mom.

- Don't you Mama me, mother fucker.

Uh-uh, no way, baby.

Concentrate on the portal, you pervert.

We gotta close it forever so nothing comes through it

on either end.

- Okay, on three, one, two--

- Just concentrate, mother fucker!

- And that's fucking that.

- See what happens with team work?

And you use your powers for good?

- Yeah, it's so much more rewarding

than trying to take over the world, isn't it?

- Shut the fuck up.

Fuck UPA, let's get down to business.

I'm taking back the shop.

You losers will be working for me,

and you know what that means, got it?

- Actually, I don't need the job,

I have plenty of money.

- You are working for me, dickhead.

- Got it.

- So if this is another grand opening,

does that mean we can have a grand opening party?

- As long as your asses are selling my weed,

I don't give a fuck what you all do.

Just leave me alone.

- Yeah, there's no video for you.

My little Weedy.

- Serenity is the driver of healing.

Freedom is the co-pilot of life.

- You're the best dad a weed boy could ever have.

- Oh, for fuck's sake.

- I'm gonna get those idiots

if it's the last thing I ever do.

- Just kick the naked titty to the door.

- Do you know where this goes?

- That goes right there.

We're gonna need way more ew.

- Wait 'til I get my revenge.

It's gonna be so bad and sexy.

- Gingerdead Man, revenge!

- What the fuck?