Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,703 --> 00:00:05,238
Good evening, friends,
2
00:00:05,271 --> 00:00:07,941
and welcome to the Good Time Gospel Hour.
3
00:00:07,974 --> 00:00:12,379
I have a vision, a beautiful vision.
4
00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:15,115
A vision that's larger than life.
5
00:00:15,148 --> 00:00:18,318
And I need to ask you to reach deep
6
00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:21,821
and I mean all the way down to the bottom of your pockets
7
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:24,424
and send in all of your cash.
8
00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:28,395
Remember, if it doesn't hurt, it's not charity.
9
00:00:28,428 --> 00:00:31,631
That's the Good Time Gospel Hour.
10
00:00:31,664 --> 00:00:36,136
Father Daddy Baba, P.O. Box 461339,
11
00:00:36,169 --> 00:00:40,240
Hollywood, California 90046.
12
00:01:17,710 --> 00:01:20,880
Oh, shit!
13
00:01:28,254 --> 00:01:31,691
I said, no!
14
00:01:34,828 --> 00:01:36,229
Why not?
15
00:01:36,262 --> 00:01:38,331
Because I'm not ready.
16
00:01:39,966 --> 00:01:41,868
Not ready?
17
00:01:41,901 --> 00:01:43,369
That's right.
18
00:01:43,403 --> 00:01:46,139
Oh, great! Thanks a lot.
19
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:47,474
My bra too?
20
00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:49,776
What? All I did was unsnap it.
21
00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:51,478
The snaps in the back, bozo.
22
00:01:51,511 --> 00:01:53,413
You ripped it.
23
00:01:55,815 --> 00:01:57,450
Christy, how long do we have to wait?
24
00:01:57,484 --> 00:01:59,953
We've been going together since the beginning of time.
25
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:02,288
This is our third date.
26
00:02:02,322 --> 00:02:04,757
The longest three dates of my life.
27
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:11,231
Jer, I've gotten into more trouble because of you
28
00:02:11,264 --> 00:02:13,299
than with anybody else I've ever known.
29
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:14,868
Like when?
30
00:02:14,901 --> 00:02:16,870
Like when?
31
00:02:16,903 --> 00:02:19,739
Like when you put firecrackers in the tampon dispenser in
32
00:02:19,772 --> 00:02:22,542
the girls room and I was suspended for three days.
33
00:02:23,443 --> 00:02:26,546
And when you charged $180
34
00:02:26,579 --> 00:02:29,682
of 976-PARTY to my father's credit card.
35
00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:31,184
Hey, I'm planning to pay that back.
36
00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:36,055
My parents think I've lost it.
37
00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:38,024
One more thing and I'm grounded for life.
38
00:02:38,691 --> 00:02:39,692
They're strict.
39
00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:42,228
What time is it?
40
00:02:43,696 --> 00:02:46,165
Relax, it's only 9:30.
41
00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:49,302
I had to promise I'd be back by 10:00 just so they'd let
42
00:02:50,603 --> 00:02:54,941
Wait a minute, what time was it last time I asked you?
43
00:02:54,974 --> 00:02:57,577
You know, 9:30 sounds kind of familiar, doesn't it?
44
00:02:58,611 --> 00:03:01,381
And what time was it the time before that?
45
00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:03,349
Uh-oh
46
00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:10,657
Hey, it's not my fault, it stopped!
47
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:12,892
Just shut up and step on it.
48
00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:56,169
Hi.
49
00:03:56,202 --> 00:03:58,671
Do you know what time it is?
50
00:03:58,705 --> 00:04:00,607
Uh, 9:30?
51
00:04:01,874 --> 00:04:04,010
It's 12:44.
52
00:04:04,043 --> 00:04:05,712
Care to clue us in where you've been
53
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,614
for the past six hours?
54
00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:09,415
We were worried sick.
55
00:04:09,449 --> 00:04:10,883
Shut up, Margaret!
56
00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:12,085
I can explain.
57
00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:13,686
See, Jerry's watch stopped.
58
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,055
So, the Kaminski kid.
59
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,290
I might have known!
60
00:04:17,323 --> 00:04:19,258
We didn't do anything wrong.
61
00:04:19,292 --> 00:04:21,294
Oh? Nothing you'd have to make an
62
00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:23,329
extra trip to confession for?
63
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:24,631
No!
64
00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:26,566
You better not be lying!
65
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:29,268
We didn't I swear!
66
00:04:29,302 --> 00:04:32,205
Holy handfuls!
67
00:04:45,985 --> 00:04:47,153
That's it, young lady!
68
00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:48,821
You're going to Catholic school!
69
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:53,926
♪ I thought you'd understand
70
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,664
♪ When I led you by the hand
71
00:04:57,697 --> 00:05:00,967
♪ That I'd never make you go
72
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,836
♪ Unless you wanted to
73
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:07,774
♪ Come on now
74
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:11,678
♪ I'm the guy who will show you what it's all about
75
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:15,014
♪ Oh, I've got to know
76
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,949
♪ Why'd you have to go?
77
00:05:18,384 --> 00:05:20,319
♪ Why'd you have to go?
78
00:05:21,587 --> 00:05:24,691
♪ Now you're telling him
79
00:05:24,724 --> 00:05:28,695
♪ Everything you used to say to me and more
80
00:05:28,728 --> 00:05:33,399
♪ And you know very well that I think he's a joke! ♪
81
00:05:36,035 --> 00:05:38,571
♪ Come on now
82
00:05:38,604 --> 00:05:42,108
♪ I'm a guy who will show you what it's all about
83
00:05:42,141 --> 00:05:45,545
♪ Oh, I've got to know
84
00:05:45,578 --> 00:05:47,513
♪ Why'd you have to go?
85
00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:50,850
♪ Why'd you have to go?
86
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,287
♪ Why'd you have to go?
87
00:05:56,556 --> 00:06:00,326
♪ You were gonna make me cry
88
00:06:03,362 --> 00:06:07,834
♪ You were gonna make me wonder why
89
00:06:10,136 --> 00:06:13,306
♪ You were gonna make me
90
00:06:13,339 --> 00:06:16,109
♪ Think about the times you lied
91
00:06:16,943 --> 00:06:19,278
♪ You hurt me so
92
00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:21,247
♪ Why'd you have to go?
93
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,817
♪ Why'd you have to go?
94
00:06:26,352 --> 00:06:28,287
♪ Why'd you have to go?
95
00:06:29,655 --> 00:06:32,058
♪ Why'd you have to go?
96
00:06:32,091 --> 00:06:33,693
I'm serious. I tried everything.
97
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:35,795
I wined her, dined her, changed my underwear.
98
00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:36,996
The works.
99
00:06:37,029 --> 00:06:38,197
So we're up at the point
100
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:40,600
and I figure it's time to make my move.
101
00:06:40,633 --> 00:06:43,236
I turn to her and bam! She's out like a light.
102
00:06:44,437 --> 00:06:46,072
Dude, what'd you do?
103
00:06:46,105 --> 00:06:47,707
What any real man would do.
104
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:50,042
I figured it was time to take a few liberties.
105
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:52,278
So I'm a half a heartbeat away from the valley of my
106
00:06:52,311 --> 00:06:54,814
ultra-vixen, she snaps out of her coma and
107
00:06:54,847 --> 00:06:58,050
throws me back like a side of beef in the barnyard.
108
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,585
No!
109
00:06:59,619 --> 00:07:01,454
Even the watch gag failed.
110
00:07:01,487 --> 00:07:03,556
Jeez, you tried the watch gag again?
111
00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:06,025
If the shoe fits, don't fix it.
112
00:07:06,058 --> 00:07:07,727
How about your famous, I'm so in love with you
113
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:11,097
I couldn't control myself and can't live without you line?
114
00:07:11,130 --> 00:07:12,732
I'll call her tonight.
115
00:07:22,842 --> 00:07:26,813
Hello. Christy isn't here. We've sent her to boarding school
116
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:29,482
away from the influence of losers.
117
00:07:29,515 --> 00:07:31,384
Like you, Kaminski!
118
00:07:31,417 --> 00:07:34,020
Anyway, Christy isn't here.
119
00:07:34,053 --> 00:07:36,722
So don't call here anymore.
120
00:07:36,756 --> 00:07:37,990
Get it?
121
00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:39,058
Got it?
122
00:07:39,091 --> 00:07:40,193
Good!
123
00:07:43,529 --> 00:07:46,833
Kaminski's a loser, loser, Kaminski, brawk!
124
00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:50,970
Well let's go. Dad!
125
00:07:51,003 --> 00:07:52,805
Give me another chance, please?
126
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:54,740
I promise I won't mess up.
127
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:57,777
Ten years from now you'll thank me for this, Christy.
128
00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:59,979
I think you'll find that a year without
129
00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:02,815
sex, drugs and rock n' roll
130
00:08:02,849 --> 00:08:05,117
is just what the doctor ordered.
131
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,920
How can you be so sure this is going to make any difference?
132
00:08:07,954 --> 00:08:11,824
Well, if it doesn't, there's another school that will,
133
00:08:12,458 --> 00:08:14,560
Godthab Academy.
134
00:08:14,594 --> 00:08:16,462
Godthab, where's that?
135
00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:17,897
Greenland.
136
00:08:18,631 --> 00:08:20,199
Greenland.
137
00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:22,969
Anybody have to go potty before we leave?
138
00:08:24,136 --> 00:08:25,304
Please.
139
00:08:32,378 --> 00:08:33,880
Oh, hello!
140
00:08:33,913 --> 00:08:36,482
You must be Mr. and Mrs. Murphy.
141
00:08:37,049 --> 00:08:38,317
Sister.
142
00:08:39,385 --> 00:08:40,720
How do you do?
143
00:08:41,554 --> 00:08:44,223
Oh, and this is Christy I take it.
144
00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:45,958
Hello.
145
00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:47,693
Speak up, Christy.
146
00:08:47,727 --> 00:08:48,761
Hi!
147
00:08:49,662 --> 00:08:51,797
She is a spunky one isn't she?
148
00:08:51,831 --> 00:08:54,567
I'd say too much for her own good, Sister.
149
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:56,369
Three years of public school
150
00:08:56,402 --> 00:08:58,537
has turned this girl into a libertine.
151
00:08:59,305 --> 00:09:01,240
Oh, my goodness!
152
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:02,308
Dad!
153
00:09:02,341 --> 00:09:04,277
She needs a year away from the influence of
154
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:05,945
sex, drugs and
155
00:09:07,013 --> 00:09:08,047
What's the other thing?
156
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,216
Rock and roll!
157
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:11,817
Right!
158
00:09:11,851 --> 00:09:15,054
Well, I can assure you, Mr. Murphy.
159
00:09:15,087 --> 00:09:18,524
There will be none of that around here.
160
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:21,427
We turn out proper young ladies.
161
00:09:21,460 --> 00:09:23,296
He's kicking! He's kicking! Oh!
162
00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,532
Uh!
163
00:09:26,565 --> 00:09:30,136
Are you ready to become a proper young lady, Christy?
164
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:34,140
Yeah.
165
00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:38,277
There you go. She's learning already.
166
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:40,579
We have mass every morning at 7:00 a.m.
167
00:09:40,613 --> 00:09:43,015
Classes from 8:00 until 3:00.
168
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:46,919
There will be no records, no TVs, no radios,
169
00:09:46,953 --> 00:09:51,424
no loud talking, no slouching, no immodest hairdos,
170
00:09:51,457 --> 00:09:54,627
no uncovered sneezing, in fact there will be nothing
171
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:57,163
of any kind in the dormitories.
172
00:09:57,196 --> 00:09:59,365
Any questions? No.
173
00:09:59,398 --> 00:10:02,168
Just follow these rules and these will be the best
174
00:10:02,201 --> 00:10:04,070
years of your life.
175
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,505
Kathleen is our senior dorm monitor.
176
00:10:06,539 --> 00:10:09,909
Any questions or problems, go to Kathleen.
177
00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:13,245
Hi, Sister Romona. It's so nice to see you.
178
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:16,215
Kathleen, this is Christy Murphy.
179
00:10:16,248 --> 00:10:18,017
She'll be staying on your floor.
180
00:10:18,050 --> 00:10:21,320
Oh, how super! It's so nice to meet you Christy.
181
00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:23,122
Same here.
182
00:10:23,155 --> 00:10:24,623
Well, why don't you get her settled in
183
00:10:24,657 --> 00:10:26,158
and I'll bring her luggage up.
184
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:28,794
Right away, Sister. It'll be my pleasure!
185
00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:35,267
Attention virgins, there will
186
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:39,271
be no lambada dancing permitted in the dormitory.
187
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:42,842
That dance is forbidden. I repeat,
188
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:45,911
that dance is forbidden.
189
00:10:48,014 --> 00:10:50,249
So you're the new inmate?
190
00:10:50,282 --> 00:10:51,717
Huh?
191
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,552
What are you in for?
192
00:10:54,787 --> 00:10:56,555
Dope?
193
00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:58,591
Sex?
194
00:10:58,624 --> 00:11:00,292
No, actually, it's all a misunderstanding
195
00:11:00,326 --> 00:11:01,627
by my parents.
196
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,297
Right.
197
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:08,601
Listen, I'll give it to you straight.
198
00:11:08,634 --> 00:11:11,037
The rule around here is you play by my rules
199
00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:12,938
and I don't sic the nuns on you.
200
00:11:12,972 --> 00:11:16,308
You stick with that and we'll get along just fine.
201
00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:23,249
Ah!
202
00:11:23,282 --> 00:11:25,751
Jesus Christ, McBride.
203
00:11:25,785 --> 00:11:26,919
Who are you?
204
00:11:26,952 --> 00:11:28,587
Christy Murphy.
205
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:30,322
She's your new roommate.
206
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,425
Theresa McBride, Melanie Baines.
207
00:11:32,925 --> 00:11:34,326
Oh, hi. Hi.
208
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,195
Hi. Hi, nice to meet you.
209
00:11:36,228 --> 00:11:39,098
I'll leave you lovebirds to get acquainted.
210
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:43,302
Oh, and make sure you tell her about the
211
00:11:43,335 --> 00:11:45,438
Poor Pagan Children's Fund.
212
00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:53,312
So what is the Poor Pagan Children's Fund?
213
00:11:53,345 --> 00:11:55,347
It's this pool that we have to contribute $5.00
214
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,049
to every week.
215
00:11:57,083 --> 00:11:59,018
Administered by Kathleen,
216
00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:00,319
if you get my meaning.
217
00:12:00,352 --> 00:12:02,154
God damn, what a bitch!
218
00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:04,056
I heard that!
219
00:12:07,526 --> 00:12:10,429
So, do you guys ever have any fun around here?
220
00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:11,931
Oh sure we have lots of fun.
221
00:12:11,964 --> 00:12:13,666
Is there ever any boys around?
222
00:12:13,699 --> 00:12:16,402
Oh no. Boys are not allowed on campus,
223
00:12:16,435 --> 00:12:18,237
at least until the big formal.
224
00:12:19,705 --> 00:12:20,706
Wonderful.
225
00:12:23,442 --> 00:12:25,978
You would be well advised to nip that attitude problem
226
00:12:26,011 --> 00:12:27,880
right in the bud and get
227
00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:31,350
on with the program. Because if you don't
228
00:12:34,553 --> 00:12:37,590
Oh, Sister Romona, let me help you.
229
00:12:37,623 --> 00:12:40,326
Oh that's all right I've got it.
230
00:12:40,359 --> 00:12:42,428
How are we getting along here?
231
00:12:42,461 --> 00:12:43,562
Great!
232
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,531
Hi, Derek. Hi, girls.
233
00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:49,602
Christy, this is Derek, the campus security guard.
234
00:12:49,635 --> 00:12:51,904
He's our hero.
235
00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:53,572
Right, Derek?
236
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,842
Right.
237
00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:59,545
Come on, Derek, I better go get that trunk.
238
00:12:59,578 --> 00:13:03,415
You can hold the door for me.
239
00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:04,817
Bye, girls.
240
00:13:09,555 --> 00:13:11,557
You remember what I said.
241
00:13:18,564 --> 00:13:19,565
Oh, Dick?
242
00:13:20,599 --> 00:13:22,034
Hmm?
243
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:23,068
You know I've been thinking.
244
00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:26,172
Yeah?
245
00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:28,707
Maybe it won't be so bad having Christy
246
00:13:28,741 --> 00:13:30,376
out of the house now.
247
00:13:30,409 --> 00:13:31,710
How so?
248
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:10,049
Hey, do you guys mind hurrying up?
249
00:14:10,082 --> 00:14:12,484
Easy, Theo, I'm gonna need a good 15 to 20 minutes
250
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,286
just to coil it out.
251
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:17,089
Just a pinch between the cheek and gum.
252
00:14:17,122 --> 00:14:18,324
Ahh!
253
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:21,460
You know many parts are edible.
254
00:14:21,493 --> 00:14:23,162
You guys are disgusting.
255
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:25,231
Hey, I'm just getting to the good part.
256
00:14:25,264 --> 00:14:27,233
Oh, that's it, I'm gonna puke.
257
00:14:32,304 --> 00:14:34,640
You know, guys, I've been thinking.
258
00:14:37,409 --> 00:14:39,578
If clowns like Stallone and Norris can
259
00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:41,146
lambada in and out of Nam
260
00:14:41,180 --> 00:14:43,182
like a couple of cats climbing a tree,
261
00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:45,217
should be a piece of cake for a threesome of smooth
262
00:14:45,251 --> 00:14:47,086
operators such as ourselves
263
00:14:47,119 --> 00:14:49,488
to crack the parochial padlock on Virgin High.
264
00:14:50,656 --> 00:14:51,824
So you cats up for a little
265
00:14:51,857 --> 00:14:54,193
espionage-o-logical expedition?
266
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:57,263
Guys, there's no toilet paper in here.
267
00:14:59,064 --> 00:15:00,165
Later, Zoom.
268
00:15:00,199 --> 00:15:02,401
Hey guys this isn't funny.
269
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:04,670
I had Mexican food!
270
00:15:04,703 --> 00:15:06,805
You guys!
271
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,407
Hey!
272
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:09,808
Get back here!
273
00:15:15,881 --> 00:15:18,951
So, it was at the Council of Trent they made the
274
00:15:18,984 --> 00:15:22,454
all-important decree of what? Who? Anybody.
275
00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:25,925
Melanie. Justification.
276
00:15:25,958 --> 00:15:28,727
Very good. The Decree of Justification,
277
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:32,965
which condemned that nasty thing called what?
278
00:15:34,199 --> 00:15:35,935
Yes, Melanie? Pelagianism.
279
00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:38,203
Pelagianism. Very good.
280
00:15:38,237 --> 00:15:41,840
I'm glad someone is thinking.
281
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:46,145
Now, all of this would not have been necessary, of course,
282
00:15:46,178 --> 00:15:48,981
had it not been for that sneaky little twerp,
283
00:15:49,014 --> 00:15:53,786
Mr. Martin Luther, who is guilty of having started the what?
284
00:15:55,587 --> 00:15:56,622
Kathleen.
285
00:15:58,757 --> 00:16:00,693
The civil rights movement?
286
00:16:00,726 --> 00:16:02,628
Oh, good heavens, no.
287
00:16:02,661 --> 00:16:03,962
Christy?
288
00:16:03,996 --> 00:16:05,164
The Protestant Revolt.
289
00:16:05,197 --> 00:16:07,299
Yes, the Protestant Revolt
290
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:10,235
and don't ever say the Reformation.
291
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,107
Well now, girls, the um
292
00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:17,009
Bishop has decreed
293
00:16:17,042 --> 00:16:22,014
that from now on our school must teach sex education.
294
00:16:22,047 --> 00:16:24,083
So, everyone pay attention.
295
00:16:25,951 --> 00:16:29,021
The sperm fertilizes the egg, the egg becomes a zygote,
296
00:16:29,054 --> 00:16:32,658
the zygote becomes an embryo, the embryo becomes a fetus,
297
00:16:32,691 --> 00:16:34,560
the fetus grows, you get fat and have a baby.
298
00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:36,428
Are there any questions?
299
00:16:36,462 --> 00:16:39,832
For tomorrow, chapter 23 in the religion text.
300
00:16:39,865 --> 00:16:43,102
Staying Off The Slippery Slide to Hell.
301
00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:44,770
Class dismissed.
302
00:16:46,972 --> 00:16:49,908
Ah! I'm so sorry, Christy.
303
00:16:49,942 --> 00:16:53,278
What a big klutz I am! Let me help you.
304
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:55,981
You owe $25 to the Poor Pagan Children's Fund
305
00:16:56,014 --> 00:16:58,884
and you better pay up by Friday, or else.
306
00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:00,853
Here you go, hon.
307
00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:16,001
Mr. Casey is ill.
308
00:17:16,034 --> 00:17:19,671
So I'll be filling in for him today here at Roosevelt.
309
00:17:21,273 --> 00:17:24,743
My name is Ms. Bush
310
00:17:25,978 --> 00:17:29,281
and today's science subject
311
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:39,191
Is sex education.
312
00:17:40,659 --> 00:17:41,927
Okay.
313
00:17:43,028 --> 00:17:44,496
Sex.
314
00:17:46,965 --> 00:17:51,970
What is it and what can it do for you?
315
00:17:53,872 --> 00:17:56,008
Well, at the end of class
316
00:17:56,041 --> 00:17:58,510
we'll have a little demonstration.
317
00:17:58,544 --> 00:18:02,414
But first let's discuss the basics.
318
00:18:10,622 --> 00:18:12,458
The sex organs,
319
00:18:15,894 --> 00:18:19,965
one hundred and one ways in which they are aroused.
320
00:18:34,746 --> 00:18:36,715
Hey, Zoomer, do you gotta do that here?
321
00:18:36,748 --> 00:18:38,650
Hey, I got plaque, do you mind?
322
00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:39,985
Yeah, I do mind.
323
00:18:40,018 --> 00:18:42,187
Well, I have a newsflash, fuck you!
324
00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:45,290
Would you guys chill out?
325
00:18:49,194 --> 00:18:52,598
Man, I hate this! Every day we come up here after school
326
00:18:52,631 --> 00:18:54,333
and we stand around with our thumbs up our asses.
327
00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:56,235
Whose fault is that?
328
00:18:56,268 --> 00:18:58,670
My point is we don't ever do anything.
329
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:00,806
I mean there's a whole world full of action out there and
330
00:19:00,839 --> 00:19:02,641
we're sitting around here picking our teeth
331
00:19:02,674 --> 00:19:03,742
with a coat hanger.
332
00:19:03,775 --> 00:19:05,911
Yeah, you're right Theo. We never do shit!
333
00:19:05,944 --> 00:19:07,246
We gotta get where the grins are.
334
00:19:07,279 --> 00:19:08,413
You said it, Zoomer.
335
00:19:08,447 --> 00:19:10,048
Well, let's get out of here. What do you say?
336
00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:11,116
Right around you, dude!
337
00:19:11,149 --> 00:19:12,818
Do we cruise or what's the news?
338
00:19:12,851 --> 00:19:15,120
All the way, jock patrol!
339
00:19:16,255 --> 00:19:19,791
Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
340
00:19:20,859 --> 00:19:22,361
We're out of here.
341
00:19:22,394 --> 00:19:25,197
You with us, Jer? Sure, where we going?
342
00:19:25,230 --> 00:19:27,266
Umm?
343
00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:30,269
You know guys, your problem is a very simple one,
344
00:19:30,302 --> 00:19:32,838
you've got no babes.
345
00:19:32,871 --> 00:19:34,573
Really? Well, I haven't noticed you getting your
346
00:19:34,606 --> 00:19:35,874
weenie roasted lately.
347
00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:37,643
Yeah, but in my case, it's because they sent my
348
00:19:37,676 --> 00:19:38,710
squeeze to boarding school.
349
00:19:38,744 --> 00:19:39,778
Zoomer is right.
350
00:19:39,811 --> 00:19:41,747
I mean, let's face it, were washouts with chicks.
351
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:42,915
Yeah, damn it.
352
00:19:42,948 --> 00:19:44,249
But it's not our fault is it?
353
00:19:45,584 --> 00:19:47,386
Maybe you guys just aren't cool enough.
354
00:19:49,621 --> 00:19:52,824
Oh, no, Jerry, we are definitely cool enough.
355
00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:54,927
We are the polar ice caps of coolness.
356
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:58,830
We just have the law of supply and demand working against us.
357
00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:00,399
You know maybe you guys are right.
358
00:20:00,432 --> 00:20:04,002
I mean, even I can't get a new babe and I invented coolness.
359
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,538
So, what are you going to do about it, frosty?
360
00:20:06,572 --> 00:20:08,807
I've got a plan. All right.
361
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:10,742
You guys stick with me and we'll get the law of
362
00:20:10,776 --> 00:20:13,245
supply and demand to work for us for a change.
363
00:20:21,086 --> 00:20:22,854
Foul! No way!
364
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:25,257
You fouled me, Murphy, everyone saw!
365
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:26,692
You charged.
366
00:20:26,725 --> 00:20:29,294
I say foul. Foul stands.
367
00:20:29,328 --> 00:20:31,363
My free throw.
368
00:20:34,366 --> 00:20:35,901
Woo-hoo-hoo!
369
00:20:57,723 --> 00:21:00,459
Behold the denizens of the Academy of the Blessed Virgin.
370
00:21:00,492 --> 00:21:01,760
Virgin High?
371
00:21:01,793 --> 00:21:03,262
Ow!
372
00:21:03,295 --> 00:21:05,464
Easy, Zoom, don't make me get the fire hose.
373
00:21:05,497 --> 00:21:07,366
Oh, come on. Get real here, Jerry.
374
00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:08,967
These are Catholic girls we're talking about.
375
00:21:09,001 --> 00:21:12,170
So? So you know how it is with Catholic girls.
376
00:21:12,204 --> 00:21:14,740
You can looky, but you no touchy.
377
00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:16,108
Oh, ye of little faith.
378
00:21:16,141 --> 00:21:19,378
Let's get in there and slurp up a little poontang.
379
00:21:19,411 --> 00:21:20,679
What?
380
00:21:20,712 --> 00:21:22,514
Come on, what are we waiting for? Let's go get 'em!
381
00:21:22,547 --> 00:21:24,449
Zoomer, in case you haven't noticed,
382
00:21:24,483 --> 00:21:26,952
this is a private Catholic girls' school,
383
00:21:26,985 --> 00:21:28,987
surrounded by an eight foot fence
384
00:21:29,021 --> 00:21:30,122
and guarded by nuns who
385
00:21:30,155 --> 00:21:33,292
probably carry guns, chains and hand grenades.
386
00:21:33,325 --> 00:21:35,594
Theo, you have to understand that nuns are merely
387
00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:36,828
a state of mind.
388
00:21:36,862 --> 00:21:39,097
With the right attitude and a skillful plan,
389
00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:41,533
there's no reason why a group of smart studly gauchos
390
00:21:41,566 --> 00:21:44,069
like us can't have the run of the candy store.
391
00:21:44,102 --> 00:21:45,871
And you've got such a plan I presume.
392
00:21:45,904 --> 00:21:48,540
It's a two prong plan, listen closely.
393
00:21:48,573 --> 00:21:49,841
Prong number one,
394
00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:51,977
Zoomer, put your tongue back in your mouth.
395
00:21:52,010 --> 00:21:53,712
You look like a basset hound.
396
00:21:53,745 --> 00:21:54,913
Prong number two,
397
00:21:54,946 --> 00:21:56,948
you guys go back and wait in the car,
398
00:21:56,982 --> 00:21:59,017
I'll go inside and scope things out.
399
00:21:59,051 --> 00:22:00,886
As soon as I have the situation in hand,
400
00:22:00,919 --> 00:22:02,354
I wave you guys in.
401
00:22:02,387 --> 00:22:05,891
You come on down, being real cool, like you belong here.
402
00:22:05,924 --> 00:22:08,226
You're just going to walk in the gate?
403
00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:10,362
You got it. It's too simple.
404
00:22:10,395 --> 00:22:12,564
The brilliant plans always are.
405
00:22:13,365 --> 00:22:14,366
Gentlemen
406
00:22:23,508 --> 00:22:25,711
Can I help you? No.
407
00:22:26,812 --> 00:22:29,381
Can you tell me what business you have here?
408
00:22:29,414 --> 00:22:30,816
I'd like to, but I can't.
409
00:22:30,849 --> 00:22:33,752
Well, then I'm afraid I can't let you in.
410
00:22:34,753 --> 00:22:35,887
If you must know,
411
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:38,356
I'm an official emissary from the Vatican.
412
00:22:38,390 --> 00:22:40,592
They sent me over here to sort of check-up on
413
00:22:40,625 --> 00:22:42,327
some of the girls, give them a couple of interviews,
414
00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:44,963
check up on the morals of today's youth.
415
00:22:44,996 --> 00:22:48,166
It's an order that comes directly from you know who.
416
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:50,235
Uh-huh.
417
00:22:50,268 --> 00:22:52,370
Sounds like a crock to me.
418
00:22:52,404 --> 00:22:54,506
Oh it does, does it? Yup.
419
00:22:54,539 --> 00:22:56,041
Well, does the word excommunication
420
00:22:56,074 --> 00:22:57,943
mean anything to you?
421
00:22:57,976 --> 00:22:59,444
Nope.
422
00:23:00,112 --> 00:23:01,480
It doesn't?
423
00:23:02,547 --> 00:23:04,149
I'm not a Catholic.
424
00:23:04,182 --> 00:23:06,718
Then I can let you off the hook!
425
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:09,554
Nice try, Sherlock.
426
00:23:09,588 --> 00:23:11,590
Now, why don't you get out of here
427
00:23:11,623 --> 00:23:13,859
and don't come back.
428
00:23:14,526 --> 00:23:15,727
Got it.
429
00:23:16,194 --> 00:23:17,562
I'll see ya.
430
00:23:24,669 --> 00:23:25,837
Well, Einstein?
431
00:23:25,871 --> 00:23:27,639
We're going to need a new plan.
432
00:23:43,722 --> 00:23:45,490
Do you guys ever get horny?
433
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:47,092
Christy!
434
00:23:48,593 --> 00:23:50,095
You two are terrible!
435
00:23:50,128 --> 00:23:51,830
I never have those kind of thoughts.
436
00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:55,167
Oh, come off it, Theresa.
437
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:56,601
I don't!
438
00:23:56,635 --> 00:23:59,204
Unlike the two of you, I intend to bypass purgatory
439
00:23:59,237 --> 00:24:01,072
altogether and go straight to heaven.
440
00:24:01,673 --> 00:24:02,941
Right.
441
00:24:02,974 --> 00:24:06,378
And you mean to say, if Derek walked in here right now,
442
00:24:06,411 --> 00:24:08,146
stone-cold naked,
443
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,416
and he said,
444
00:24:11,449 --> 00:24:14,920
Theresa, I'm madly in love with you
445
00:24:16,021 --> 00:24:21,226
I crave your firm young body.
446
00:24:21,259 --> 00:24:22,394
Will you two cut it out?
447
00:24:22,427 --> 00:24:25,764
I want to rip the clothes from your creamy white flesh
448
00:24:25,797 --> 00:24:29,234
and caress your soft supple breasts.
449
00:24:29,267 --> 00:24:30,836
No, please, no!
450
00:24:30,869 --> 00:24:34,673
We'll drown together in a sea of unbridled passion.
451
00:24:34,706 --> 00:24:40,378
We'll have simultaneous, multiple orgasms.
452
00:24:43,582 --> 00:24:45,517
Oh, no! Ahh!
453
00:25:06,137 --> 00:25:07,272
Ohh!
454
00:25:24,956 --> 00:25:26,091
Whew.
455
00:25:31,930 --> 00:25:33,765
Let's do it again!
456
00:25:33,798 --> 00:25:36,534
Oh, I'd love to but I've got homework to do.
457
00:25:36,568 --> 00:25:37,836
Oh, come on.
458
00:25:37,869 --> 00:25:40,839
Now, who was it that got you a key to the Coke machine?
459
00:25:40,872 --> 00:25:42,407
It was me, wasn't it?
460
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:43,942
Derek, Derek, Derek.
461
00:25:43,975 --> 00:25:45,977
Surely you've heard of the concept of
462
00:25:46,011 --> 00:25:48,113
reasonable value for services rendered.
463
00:25:48,146 --> 00:25:49,814
Now, come on. It's time to scoot!
464
00:25:49,848 --> 00:25:51,249
No, no!
465
00:25:52,217 --> 00:25:54,653
I'm a little bit tired of this arrangement.
466
00:25:54,686 --> 00:25:56,554
I mean I stuck my neck out for you.
467
00:25:56,588 --> 00:25:58,189
I smuggled beer in here,
468
00:25:58,223 --> 00:26:00,759
I got you those answers to that test
469
00:26:00,792 --> 00:26:02,561
and all I seem to get for my troubles
470
00:26:02,594 --> 00:26:05,430
is one little quickie.
471
00:26:06,298 --> 00:26:08,967
Derek, did you ever think that maybe
472
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:11,636
I'm saving something special for you?
473
00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:15,040
Yeah, what?
474
00:26:16,608 --> 00:26:18,810
I can't tell you exactly,
475
00:26:19,945 --> 00:26:22,581
but it does involve a bicycle chain,
476
00:26:24,015 --> 00:26:25,884
a cucumber,
477
00:26:25,917 --> 00:26:28,320
and six cans of happy whip.
478
00:26:29,988 --> 00:26:31,990
Yeah?
479
00:26:32,023 --> 00:26:35,894
Now, about Sister Gregorio's attendance sheet.
480
00:26:49,207 --> 00:26:52,277
Okay, I've got it! We go up front of Virgin High, see.
481
00:26:52,310 --> 00:26:54,579
We're tossing the football back and forth.
482
00:26:54,612 --> 00:26:57,115
Then I send you out for a long pass.
483
00:26:57,148 --> 00:26:58,550
Now, here's the catch.
484
00:26:58,583 --> 00:27:00,452
I overthrow the ball.
485
00:27:00,485 --> 00:27:02,687
Get it? I overthrow the ball,
486
00:27:02,721 --> 00:27:04,189
it goes over the gate.
487
00:27:04,222 --> 00:27:06,658
They let us through to get the ball, and we're in.
488
00:27:06,691 --> 00:27:07,859
Simple as that.
489
00:27:07,892 --> 00:27:10,695
Right, Zoomer. I'm sure that the security guard is just
490
00:27:10,729 --> 00:27:13,264
going to ask us to stay for dinner because we threw our
491
00:27:13,298 --> 00:27:15,133
football through a stained-glass window.
492
00:27:15,166 --> 00:27:17,102
Oh, yeah, what's your brilliant idea
493
00:27:17,135 --> 00:27:18,503
Mr. Potato-Chip-Up-the-Butt?
494
00:27:19,237 --> 00:27:21,806
How about moving on?
495
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:23,108
Finding some girls with
496
00:27:23,141 --> 00:27:25,310
intelligence and insight,
497
00:27:25,343 --> 00:27:28,279
with depth and wisdom.
498
00:27:28,313 --> 00:27:30,715
A girl who has something to say.
499
00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:36,021
Theo, be serious.
500
00:27:36,054 --> 00:27:38,123
Anyways, I've got an idea.
501
00:27:50,468 --> 00:27:52,170
Kaminski, this is definitely the dumbest
502
00:27:52,203 --> 00:27:54,406
thing you've done yet.
503
00:27:54,439 --> 00:27:56,041
Do you want to meet those girls or what?
504
00:27:56,074 --> 00:27:58,276
Bring them back alive, J-Man!
505
00:28:23,301 --> 00:28:24,769
Hello, Father.
506
00:28:27,172 --> 00:28:28,173
Hello, Father.
507
00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:30,041
Hi, Papa.
508
00:28:55,500 --> 00:28:56,634
Father! Ahh!
509
00:28:56,668 --> 00:28:58,903
Oh, I'm sorry, did I startle you?
510
00:28:58,937 --> 00:29:00,638
No, actually I just, uh, inspected
511
00:29:00,672 --> 00:29:02,006
the water fountain over here.
512
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:03,441
Boy, cold.
513
00:29:03,475 --> 00:29:06,511
I'm Sister Felicia, the principal.
514
00:29:06,544 --> 00:29:08,313
I'm Father Guus.
515
00:29:09,314 --> 00:29:10,849
Father Goose?
516
00:29:11,683 --> 00:29:13,351
Guus, it's Dutch.
517
00:29:14,452 --> 00:29:17,288
Well, you must have just been ordained.
518
00:29:17,322 --> 00:29:19,090
Accelerated.
519
00:29:19,124 --> 00:29:20,859
We haven't seen you here before.
520
00:29:20,892 --> 00:29:23,294
Is there something we can do for you?
521
00:29:23,328 --> 00:29:25,363
Actually, the Bishop did send me over here to
522
00:29:25,396 --> 00:29:27,599
sort of check up on things.
523
00:29:27,632 --> 00:29:29,167
Which bishop?
524
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:30,535
Bishop, uh
525
00:29:32,704 --> 00:29:33,738
Who?
526
00:29:33,771 --> 00:29:35,173
Bishop
527
00:29:35,206 --> 00:29:36,674
Bishop Haughness?
528
00:29:36,708 --> 00:29:37,909
That's right, him.
529
00:29:37,942 --> 00:29:40,712
I can't imagine why he would
530
00:29:40,745 --> 00:29:44,215
Oh, yes of course, Bishop Haughness.
531
00:29:44,249 --> 00:29:46,818
Well Father, we are delighted to have you with us.
532
00:29:46,851 --> 00:29:49,821
My pleasure. Oh, please, do make yourself at home.
533
00:29:49,854 --> 00:29:52,457
In fact, why don't I show you to the rectory
534
00:29:52,490 --> 00:29:54,559
and you can meet some of the other priests.
535
00:29:54,592 --> 00:29:56,227
Well I really wouldn't want
536
00:29:56,261 --> 00:29:58,296
Sister Felicia!
537
00:29:58,329 --> 00:29:59,797
Oh, excuse me Father.
538
00:29:59,831 --> 00:30:00,899
Yes, Sister, what is it?
539
00:30:00,932 --> 00:30:02,167
Felicia we have a problem.
540
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:05,336
Sister Molano Voloce has taken a vow of silence and
541
00:30:05,370 --> 00:30:08,273
we have nobody to take her theology class.
542
00:30:08,306 --> 00:30:09,374
Can't you take it?
543
00:30:09,407 --> 00:30:10,909
I have my history class.
544
00:30:10,942 --> 00:30:12,911
Oh dear, I would do it myself,
545
00:30:12,944 --> 00:30:16,648
but I have an important meeting in ten minutes.
546
00:30:16,681 --> 00:30:19,250
Perhaps the Father can help us out?
547
00:30:19,284 --> 00:30:20,818
Sister, what an excellent idea.
548
00:30:20,852 --> 00:30:21,953
Oh, would you Father?
549
00:30:21,986 --> 00:30:23,288
It's so important that we do not let their education
550
00:30:23,321 --> 00:30:24,355
be interrupted.
551
00:30:24,389 --> 00:30:26,491
And who would be better qualified?
552
00:30:26,524 --> 00:30:29,527
Yes, yes, it's the first room on the left.
553
00:30:29,561 --> 00:30:31,796
Oh, thank you so much, Father.
554
00:30:32,864 --> 00:30:35,166
You are a saint.
555
00:30:37,969 --> 00:30:40,038
So, Sister, the rumors are true.
556
00:30:40,071 --> 00:30:41,339
Which rumors?
557
00:30:41,372 --> 00:30:42,607
The ones about the Bishop wanting to
558
00:30:42,640 --> 00:30:44,309
close down our school.
559
00:30:44,342 --> 00:30:46,978
No. He has sent that young priest to check us out
560
00:30:47,011 --> 00:30:49,047
and make a report. No!
561
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:51,316
Well, good thinking to get him into that classroom.
562
00:30:51,349 --> 00:30:53,618
That will give us some time to alert everyone.
563
00:30:53,651 --> 00:30:56,688
Right. Now we must immediately get on the telephone and tell
564
00:31:11,669 --> 00:31:15,406
Good morning, class. ALL: Good morning, Father.
565
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:16,941
Right.
566
00:31:16,975 --> 00:31:20,311
Sister Molano Voloce has taken a vow of silence this morning,
567
00:31:20,345 --> 00:31:22,513
so I'll be filling in for her today.
568
00:31:22,547 --> 00:31:23,948
My name is Father Guus.
569
00:31:29,821 --> 00:31:33,157
That's Guus, not Goose.
570
00:31:33,191 --> 00:31:35,526
It's Dutch.
571
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:37,895
And this is what class? Anybody?
572
00:31:40,565 --> 00:31:42,000
Uhh, theology.
573
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,169
Good thinking.
574
00:31:45,203 --> 00:31:48,106
Which brings the question, what is theology?
575
00:31:51,943 --> 00:31:54,012
What is theology?
576
00:32:00,518 --> 00:32:02,487
Who can tell me what this is?
577
00:32:04,555 --> 00:32:05,657
A squiggle?
578
00:32:07,525 --> 00:32:09,360
I didn't call on you yet.
579
00:32:13,498 --> 00:32:14,499
Anybody?
580
00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:17,268
Anybody?
581
00:32:21,806 --> 00:32:24,342
A squiggle. Exactly.
582
00:32:24,375 --> 00:32:27,178
But who can tell me the theological ramifications
583
00:32:27,211 --> 00:32:28,746
of the squiggle?
584
00:32:28,780 --> 00:32:31,549
Come on anybody. Let's net be bashful.
585
00:32:34,552 --> 00:32:36,087
How about you?
586
00:32:39,757 --> 00:32:41,826
He could come over there at any time,
587
00:32:41,859 --> 00:32:45,663
so I would like to have everything in tip-top shape.
588
00:32:45,697 --> 00:32:47,999
All right, Sisters. Good-bye.
589
00:32:50,435 --> 00:32:52,270
Sister Felicia.
590
00:32:52,303 --> 00:32:56,240
Oh, hello, Mr. Murphy!
591
00:32:56,274 --> 00:32:57,575
Hello, Sister.
592
00:32:57,608 --> 00:32:58,876
I just wanted to check with you to see
593
00:32:58,910 --> 00:33:01,212
how our daughter Christy is doing?
594
00:33:01,245 --> 00:33:05,817
Well I am happy to report she is doing just fine.
595
00:33:05,850 --> 00:33:08,786
Her grades are good and she hasn't had
596
00:33:08,820 --> 00:33:11,055
a single discipline problem.
597
00:33:11,089 --> 00:33:13,825
Excellent! Then it seems that sending her to your
598
00:33:13,858 --> 00:33:15,860
school was the right thing to do.
599
00:33:15,893 --> 00:33:18,629
Well, it would seem so.
600
00:33:18,663 --> 00:33:20,198
Well, thank you very much, Sister.
601
00:33:20,231 --> 00:33:22,033
Oh, and one other thing.
602
00:33:22,066 --> 00:33:23,935
You may be aware that I am on the board
603
00:33:23,968 --> 00:33:26,170
of the Gelt Gouger Foundation.
604
00:33:26,204 --> 00:33:28,473
I also know about the financial difficulties
605
00:33:28,506 --> 00:33:31,209
your school has been having.
606
00:33:31,242 --> 00:33:35,046
Yes, it's unfortunate, but true, sir.
607
00:33:35,079 --> 00:33:37,348
Well, if you can keep up the good work,
608
00:33:37,382 --> 00:33:40,017
I'll see to it that the Academy of the Blessed Virgin
609
00:33:40,051 --> 00:33:42,453
receives a hefty little endowment.
610
00:33:42,487 --> 00:33:44,255
How does that sound?
611
00:33:44,288 --> 00:33:49,360
Oh! I think the Lord would approve of that, Mr. Murphy.
612
00:33:51,329 --> 00:33:55,366
Daddy Baba's Gomashio is the spice of life
613
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:57,435
order yours today by sending
614
00:33:57,468 --> 00:34:02,640
$9.95 to Howard at P.O. Box
615
00:34:02,673 --> 00:34:06,177
So, if you make a philological digression,
616
00:34:06,210 --> 00:34:09,447
you'll see that the tenants of Zoroastrianism
617
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:12,784
merely reconfirm the truism that we are after all
618
00:34:12,817 --> 00:34:15,720
merely adjuncts to the divinely ordained.
619
00:34:15,753 --> 00:34:17,922
Which brings us to the final answer.
620
00:34:17,955 --> 00:34:19,290
The final answer!
621
00:34:21,926 --> 00:34:23,761
Which is of course,
622
00:34:27,565 --> 00:34:28,800
sex.
623
00:34:32,904 --> 00:34:34,005
Class dismissed.
624
00:34:35,072 --> 00:34:36,541
Wait!
625
00:34:36,574 --> 00:34:38,075
Okay, go.
626
00:34:39,444 --> 00:34:40,978
Stop!
627
00:34:41,012 --> 00:34:43,414
Okay, the rest of you go.
628
00:34:43,448 --> 00:34:45,416
You, young lady, you stay after class.
629
00:34:52,190 --> 00:34:53,558
Hey, babe.
630
00:34:53,591 --> 00:34:54,692
Jerry, get a life.
631
00:34:54,725 --> 00:34:56,027
Shh!
632
00:34:56,060 --> 00:34:57,395
What are you doing here?
633
00:34:57,428 --> 00:34:59,464
Roosevelt has the day off.
634
00:34:59,497 --> 00:35:02,100
That wasn't my question.
635
00:35:02,133 --> 00:35:04,535
I miss you. I had to come see you.
636
00:35:04,569 --> 00:35:07,104
If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be in this place.
637
00:35:07,138 --> 00:35:09,140
You're not going to blame me for that are you?
638
00:35:09,173 --> 00:35:10,541
Yes, I am.
639
00:35:12,777 --> 00:35:13,811
Look, I'll admit,
640
00:35:13,845 --> 00:35:15,813
you've had a little bit of bad luck with me,
641
00:35:15,847 --> 00:35:18,483
but I'm turning over a new leaf, honest.
642
00:35:18,516 --> 00:35:19,851
Right.
643
00:35:19,884 --> 00:35:22,453
From now on I'm straight as an altar boy.
644
00:35:22,487 --> 00:35:25,857
And is this what the altar boys are wearing now?
645
00:35:25,890 --> 00:35:27,391
Look, it was the only way I could get in to see you.
646
00:35:27,425 --> 00:35:28,826
All right?
647
00:35:28,860 --> 00:35:32,029
This is absolutely the last gimmick I swear.
648
00:35:32,663 --> 00:35:34,499
I know you've missed me.
649
00:35:34,532 --> 00:35:36,601
And hey, I've got some friends for your friends.
650
00:35:36,634 --> 00:35:38,369
Father! I thought you might
651
00:35:38,402 --> 00:35:39,804
What's going on?
652
00:35:39,837 --> 00:35:42,874
Uh, I was just disciplining this young lady.
653
00:35:42,907 --> 00:35:44,709
Oh, what did she do?
654
00:35:45,142 --> 00:35:46,544
She was
655
00:35:48,012 --> 00:35:50,448
Making rude bodily noises.
656
00:35:50,481 --> 00:35:51,582
Christy!
657
00:35:51,616 --> 00:35:52,717
I was not!
658
00:35:52,750 --> 00:35:54,852
Well I should hope not!
659
00:35:56,254 --> 00:35:58,723
Father, I thought you might like a little
660
00:35:58,756 --> 00:36:00,892
guided tour around the school.
661
00:36:00,925 --> 00:36:02,527
Oh, that would be lovely,
662
00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:04,562
but could you just wait for me outside?
663
00:36:04,595 --> 00:36:06,531
Well, of course, Father.
664
00:36:10,902 --> 00:36:12,136
Duh, Jer.
665
00:36:12,169 --> 00:36:13,371
Why'd you say that?
666
00:36:13,404 --> 00:36:14,839
It just popped into my head.
667
00:36:14,872 --> 00:36:16,908
I ought to pop you in the head!
668
00:36:16,941 --> 00:36:19,410
I couldn't think of what to say.
669
00:36:19,443 --> 00:36:21,913
I stay out of trouble for five weeks!
670
00:36:21,946 --> 00:36:23,581
I talk to you for two minutes
671
00:36:23,614 --> 00:36:25,483
and I'm back on a shitlist again.
672
00:36:25,516 --> 00:36:27,051
Why don't you just stay out of my life?
673
00:36:29,287 --> 00:36:30,888
Christy!
674
00:36:30,922 --> 00:36:33,090
How dare you hit a priest!
675
00:36:33,124 --> 00:36:35,426
It's okay, Sister, she was just
676
00:36:37,194 --> 00:36:38,262
What were you just?
677
00:36:38,296 --> 00:36:41,132
It most certainly is not okay!
678
00:36:41,165 --> 00:36:44,535
Young lady, I am very, very disappointed with you.
679
00:36:44,569 --> 00:36:48,272
You think you're sorry now, you bet you'll be sorry!
680
00:36:48,306 --> 00:36:51,509
From now on, except for class and Church
681
00:36:51,542 --> 00:36:54,011
you will not leave your dorm until further notice.
682
00:36:54,045 --> 00:36:56,147
Do I make myself clear?
683
00:36:56,180 --> 00:36:57,415
Yes, Sister.
684
00:36:57,448 --> 00:36:58,783
Now scoot.
685
00:37:04,088 --> 00:37:05,790
Boy today's youth, huh?
686
00:37:05,823 --> 00:37:07,892
I can't understand it, Father.
687
00:37:07,925 --> 00:37:10,261
She's been such a good girl.
688
00:37:10,294 --> 00:37:13,364
Must be that time of the month.
689
00:37:15,299 --> 00:37:19,637
Well, anyway, I thought this might be a good time
690
00:37:19,670 --> 00:37:22,073
for you to hear confessions.
691
00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:24,475
Confessions?
692
00:37:41,125 --> 00:37:43,861
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
693
00:37:43,894 --> 00:37:46,330
My last confession was a week ago.
694
00:37:46,864 --> 00:37:48,799
My sins are
695
00:37:48,833 --> 00:37:52,403
I coveted my neighbor's dessert in lunch hall,
696
00:37:52,436 --> 00:37:55,673
I almost said a bad word when I stubbed my toe.
697
00:37:55,706 --> 00:37:58,476
Oh, and I had an impure thought.
698
00:37:58,509 --> 00:38:01,646
Oh, really? What kind of impure thought?
699
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:03,681
I
700
00:38:04,949 --> 00:38:07,618
I imagined I was kissing Donny Osmond.
701
00:38:08,185 --> 00:38:09,654
That's it?
702
00:38:09,687 --> 00:38:11,255
Yes, Father.
703
00:38:11,288 --> 00:38:13,057
Don't let it happen again.
704
00:38:13,491 --> 00:38:15,226
Yes, Father.
705
00:38:16,894 --> 00:38:19,330
Are you going to give me a penance?
706
00:38:21,232 --> 00:38:23,567
What do you think you deserve?
707
00:38:25,236 --> 00:38:27,505
I don't know.
708
00:38:27,538 --> 00:38:29,774
Ten Hail Mary's and The Lord's Prayer?
709
00:38:31,042 --> 00:38:32,410
I can deal with that, but
710
00:38:32,443 --> 00:38:34,412
go ahead and tack on 20 push-ups.
711
00:38:46,824 --> 00:38:48,893
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
712
00:38:48,926 --> 00:38:51,662
It's been a week since my last confession.
713
00:38:51,696 --> 00:38:53,130
Let's see
714
00:38:53,164 --> 00:38:55,900
I slugged a girl, but she asked for it.
715
00:38:56,634 --> 00:38:59,670
And I cheated on a test.
716
00:38:59,704 --> 00:39:02,506
But that's only if you call it cheating when the girl next
717
00:39:02,540 --> 00:39:04,775
to you practically begs you to look at her answer sheet
718
00:39:04,809 --> 00:39:06,944
by not covering it up.
719
00:39:06,977 --> 00:39:10,114
And I told a few fibs here and there,
720
00:39:10,147 --> 00:39:12,683
but I'm sure it didn't hurt anybody.
721
00:39:13,350 --> 00:39:15,086
Any impure thoughts?
722
00:39:15,119 --> 00:39:18,723
Well, sure, yeah some of those.
723
00:39:18,756 --> 00:39:20,558
Tell me about them.
724
00:39:20,591 --> 00:39:22,259
Well
725
00:39:22,293 --> 00:39:26,330
In math class I imagined I was sunbathing
726
00:39:26,363 --> 00:39:28,666
on a deserted island
727
00:39:28,699 --> 00:39:30,301
in my bikini
728
00:39:31,035 --> 00:39:32,136
Yes.
729
00:39:32,169 --> 00:39:34,538
And it just got so hot
730
00:39:34,572 --> 00:39:36,674
I had to take off my top.
731
00:39:37,875 --> 00:39:39,443
Really?
732
00:39:39,477 --> 00:39:43,414
And my nipples, they stood firm and erect
733
00:39:43,447 --> 00:39:45,750
as the foamy waves washed over my body.
734
00:39:46,817 --> 00:39:48,252
Yes?
735
00:39:49,520 --> 00:39:53,424
And I felt this, this tingling sensation
736
00:39:53,457 --> 00:39:55,659
on my taut supple thighs.
737
00:39:56,660 --> 00:39:59,029
And I suddenly realized
738
00:39:59,063 --> 00:40:02,767
I was madly, madly aroused.
739
00:40:06,137 --> 00:40:07,905
Is this a sin?
740
00:40:07,938 --> 00:40:09,306
I hope so.
741
00:40:09,340 --> 00:40:10,408
What?
742
00:40:10,441 --> 00:40:11,742
God only knows.
743
00:40:13,677 --> 00:40:14,712
Continue.
744
00:40:14,745 --> 00:40:16,580
You know, I thought I'd go with it.
745
00:40:16,614 --> 00:40:20,217
I grabbed the soil and I just rubbed it everywhere,
746
00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:22,119
just everywhere, all over my body.
747
00:40:22,153 --> 00:40:25,289
Because it was so hot, oh, Father, Father it was hot!
748
00:40:29,527 --> 00:40:30,861
It was hot.
749
00:40:31,195 --> 00:40:32,430
Ooh
750
00:40:32,463 --> 00:40:33,731
Mmm
751
00:40:41,539 --> 00:40:43,207
They caught him.
752
00:40:46,477 --> 00:40:48,446
They tied him up with rosary beads
753
00:40:48,479 --> 00:40:50,614
and dumped him in a vat of boiling holy water.
754
00:40:50,648 --> 00:40:53,184
Would you relax, Theo, he'll be fine.
755
00:41:03,928 --> 00:41:05,896
How did you like our chapel, Father?
756
00:41:05,930 --> 00:41:07,832
Very, very, very much.
757
00:41:07,865 --> 00:41:09,466
Good, good.
758
00:41:10,501 --> 00:41:13,737
You know you certainly did take a lot of time
759
00:41:13,771 --> 00:41:15,039
with that one girl.
760
00:41:15,072 --> 00:41:16,674
Well I like to be very thorough.
761
00:41:16,707 --> 00:41:19,243
I think of confession as a sort of
762
00:41:20,211 --> 00:41:21,812
A spiritual enema.
763
00:41:25,082 --> 00:41:26,383
Oh.
764
00:41:36,861 --> 00:41:38,996
Sister Felicia, I meant to speak with you
765
00:41:39,029 --> 00:41:40,998
about that Christy
766
00:41:41,031 --> 00:41:42,066
Murphy.
767
00:41:42,099 --> 00:41:44,168
Oh, yes, Father, what a shame.
768
00:41:44,201 --> 00:41:46,070
I don't know how to explain it.
769
00:41:46,103 --> 00:41:48,239
Actually, I think it all might have been just a little
770
00:41:48,272 --> 00:41:49,874
bit of a misunderstanding.
771
00:41:49,907 --> 00:41:52,877
See she said she wanted to make a confession with me.
772
00:41:52,910 --> 00:41:56,714
And I said, Do you want to make it with me right now?
773
00:41:56,747 --> 00:41:59,683
I think she misinterpreted.
774
00:42:01,118 --> 00:42:04,088
Well, well she still shouldn't have hit you, Father.
775
00:42:04,121 --> 00:42:05,522
Maybe we could just make her punishment
776
00:42:05,556 --> 00:42:06,757
a little less severe.
777
00:42:07,725 --> 00:42:09,894
Well, we'll see.
778
00:42:09,927 --> 00:42:13,464
Oh, I better get that. Excuse me, Father.
779
00:42:17,835 --> 00:42:19,436
Hello, Father!
780
00:42:30,981 --> 00:42:32,016
Sister Felicia.
781
00:42:32,049 --> 00:42:34,518
Sister Felicia, this is Bishop Haughness.
782
00:42:34,551 --> 00:42:36,754
Oh, hello, Bishop Haughness!
783
00:42:36,787 --> 00:42:39,657
Hello Sister. How are things at the Academy?
784
00:42:39,690 --> 00:42:42,693
Oh, just fine your Excellency, couldn't be better.
785
00:42:42,726 --> 00:42:44,528
Oh, and I want you know,
786
00:42:44,562 --> 00:42:47,231
Father Guus has been having a wonderful visit.
787
00:42:50,968 --> 00:42:52,736
Father Guus?
788
00:42:52,770 --> 00:42:55,506
After lunch were going to show him the petunia beds.
789
00:42:55,539 --> 00:42:58,475
Sister, have you been feeling all right?
790
00:42:58,509 --> 00:43:01,245
Well, yes, of course. Why do you ask?
791
00:43:01,278 --> 00:43:04,515
Never mind. Sister, I'm afraid we have some
792
00:43:04,548 --> 00:43:06,317
serious business to discuss.
793
00:43:06,350 --> 00:43:10,821
Yes, I know, we've heard the rumors, sir.
794
00:43:10,854 --> 00:43:14,992
The school has become a drain on the Church's resources.
795
00:43:15,025 --> 00:43:16,260
If it can't be turned around
796
00:43:16,293 --> 00:43:19,163
Actually, the good news is that our troubles
797
00:43:19,196 --> 00:43:20,864
may be over soon.
798
00:43:20,898 --> 00:43:23,801
I think we'll be getting an endowment from
799
00:43:23,834 --> 00:43:26,070
the Gelt Gouger Foundation!
800
00:43:27,671 --> 00:43:29,239
Oh, really?
801
00:43:30,407 --> 00:43:33,277
Yes, and if you could bear with us until the
802
00:43:33,310 --> 00:43:37,247
end of the semester, I think things will work out.
803
00:43:37,281 --> 00:43:40,684
Well, I suppose we could hold off that long.
804
00:43:40,718 --> 00:43:43,320
Oh, thank you, your Excellency!
805
00:43:43,354 --> 00:43:45,456
You won't regret it!
806
00:43:45,489 --> 00:43:48,859
And I know you'll be happy with Father Guus's report.
807
00:43:48,892 --> 00:43:51,895
Who is this Father Guus business?
808
00:43:51,929 --> 00:43:55,299
Well, you know, the priest you sent to look us over.
809
00:43:55,332 --> 00:43:57,701
I didn't send any Father Guus.
810
00:43:59,303 --> 00:44:01,972
You didn't?
811
00:44:02,006 --> 00:44:04,008
Well, all right your Excellency.
812
00:44:04,041 --> 00:44:05,976
Thank you for calling.
813
00:44:06,010 --> 00:44:07,344
Goodbye.
814
00:44:10,247 --> 00:44:11,281
Guus?
815
00:44:16,086 --> 00:44:20,624
Hmm Murphy, Christy. 217.
816
00:44:27,431 --> 00:44:28,732
Where, where is he?
817
00:44:28,766 --> 00:44:30,934
Wait till I get my hands on him.
818
00:44:30,968 --> 00:44:35,205
Father Guus indeed. I'll Father Guus him.
819
00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:38,776
My goodness if I ever see him.
820
00:44:38,809 --> 00:44:40,377
I'll goose his goose.
821
00:44:44,014 --> 00:44:46,283
Sisters and virgins be on the lookout for
822
00:44:46,316 --> 00:44:49,153
an imposter priest who has infiltrated the Academy
823
00:44:49,186 --> 00:44:51,355
under the guise of Father Guus.
824
00:44:51,388 --> 00:44:54,058
He should be considered armed and dangerous.
825
00:44:56,760 --> 00:44:59,696
Oh my God, he escaped! Well, how'd you do?
826
00:44:59,730 --> 00:45:01,098
All right!
827
00:45:01,131 --> 00:45:02,366
Put on your party hats boys
828
00:45:02,399 --> 00:45:05,002
we're coming back here tomorrow night.
829
00:45:18,949 --> 00:45:21,518
Four, five, six, free parking!
830
00:45:21,552 --> 00:45:23,387
Ahh! You bitch!
831
00:45:47,144 --> 00:45:50,013
If my calculations are correct and I do believe they are,
832
00:45:50,047 --> 00:45:53,050
Christy's dorm room is 200 yards due southwest.
833
00:45:53,083 --> 00:45:54,351
Which is right over that wall.
834
00:45:54,384 --> 00:45:55,519
Hot damn!
835
00:45:55,552 --> 00:45:57,654
No way, Kaminski. There is no way I'm going to
836
00:45:57,688 --> 00:46:00,457
be a party to this.
837
00:46:00,491 --> 00:46:01,525
Shit!
838
00:46:03,794 --> 00:46:06,196
Community chest, $200.
839
00:46:12,736 --> 00:46:14,638
I really appreciate you guys staying in with me
840
00:46:14,671 --> 00:46:15,772
tonight while I'm grounded.
841
00:46:15,806 --> 00:46:18,008
No problem, it's the least we could do.
842
00:46:18,041 --> 00:46:20,811
Yeah, and besides, it's not like we have 40 guys
843
00:46:20,844 --> 00:46:22,246
calling us for dates tonight.
844
00:46:22,279 --> 00:46:23,647
Yeah.
845
00:46:23,680 --> 00:46:24,915
You know what would really be neat?
846
00:46:24,948 --> 00:46:26,150
What?
847
00:46:26,183 --> 00:46:28,519
If three Greek gods came flying through that window
848
00:46:28,552 --> 00:46:31,588
right this minute and swept us up in their powerful
849
00:46:31,622 --> 00:46:34,291
arms and carried us off to Mt. Olympus.
850
00:46:35,459 --> 00:46:37,361
Yeah, three Greek gods.
851
00:46:38,395 --> 00:46:40,330
Attention virgins.
852
00:46:40,364 --> 00:46:42,766
Do not miss the movie tonight,
853
00:46:42,799 --> 00:46:46,370
The Bells of St. Mary, starring Bing Crosby.
854
00:46:50,073 --> 00:46:54,111
Okay Murphy, it's Friday night, time to pay the piper.
855
00:46:54,144 --> 00:46:57,047
Come on Kathleen, give her a break.
856
00:46:57,080 --> 00:47:00,517
When I want to hear from you, Bings, I'll send a fax.
857
00:47:00,551 --> 00:47:02,286
Twenty-five bucks!
858
00:47:05,322 --> 00:47:07,424
Well, I don't think you understand what the
859
00:47:07,457 --> 00:47:10,127
Poor Pagan Children's Fund is!
860
00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:12,796
It is not an optional thing!
861
00:47:12,829 --> 00:47:16,200
Everybody contributes to the Poor Pagan Children's Fund.
862
00:47:16,233 --> 00:47:19,670
What's the Poor Pagan Children's Fund?
863
00:47:19,703 --> 00:47:21,471
Good evening, Sister.
864
00:47:23,407 --> 00:47:27,678
Um, the Poor Pagan Children's Fund It
865
00:47:27,711 --> 00:47:28,979
I may as well tell you.
866
00:47:29,012 --> 00:47:31,081
See we've all been contributing to this fund
867
00:47:31,114 --> 00:47:32,950
and at the end of the semester we were going
868
00:47:32,983 --> 00:47:34,151
to give it all to you.
869
00:47:34,184 --> 00:47:36,553
It was supposed to be a surprise, but, well
870
00:47:36,587 --> 00:47:38,255
I guess you found us out.
871
00:47:38,288 --> 00:47:41,091
I'll be darned. Whose idea was this?
872
00:47:43,093 --> 00:47:44,628
Well I can't take all the credit.
873
00:47:44,661 --> 00:47:46,630
I couldn't have done it without the girls.
874
00:47:46,663 --> 00:47:49,733
And Kathleen's been keeping the money. She has over $300.
875
00:47:49,766 --> 00:47:51,201
No kidding!
876
00:47:51,235 --> 00:47:54,404
Well I must say, I didn't think you kids had it in you.
877
00:47:54,438 --> 00:47:56,273
Nice work men.
878
00:47:56,306 --> 00:47:57,574
Anyway, as you know
879
00:47:57,608 --> 00:48:00,077
we've got our big formal in a couple weeks.
880
00:48:00,110 --> 00:48:03,580
Traditionally, we hold a car wash to pay for the expenses.
881
00:48:03,614 --> 00:48:05,816
I need someone to take charge
882
00:48:05,849 --> 00:48:08,151
and I need volunteers for washing.
883
00:48:08,185 --> 00:48:11,521
Oh, I would be delighted to advance the interests
884
00:48:11,555 --> 00:48:15,692
of the school by organizing and supervising the cleansing
885
00:48:15,726 --> 00:48:18,061
of the automobiles, Sister.
886
00:48:18,095 --> 00:48:20,163
Great! You'd be perfect.
887
00:48:20,197 --> 00:48:22,733
We'll shoot for next Saturday.
888
00:48:22,766 --> 00:48:25,636
Now come on, Kathleen, let's go get that money.
889
00:48:26,103 --> 00:48:27,638
Yes, Sister.
890
00:48:37,648 --> 00:48:39,416
I don't believe this!
891
00:48:40,984 --> 00:48:43,987
Jerry, are you out of your gourd?
892
00:48:45,956 --> 00:48:46,990
Nice digs you got here.
893
00:48:47,024 --> 00:48:48,792
Get out of here!
894
00:48:48,825 --> 00:48:50,227
Oh! He's coming in!
895
00:48:50,260 --> 00:48:51,995
Be quiet, this could be interesting.
896
00:48:52,029 --> 00:48:54,197
Beautiful night for a party, isn't it?
897
00:48:54,231 --> 00:48:56,600
Don't you think you've already gotten me in enough trouble?
898
00:48:56,633 --> 00:48:58,902
I talked to the nun, you're off the hook.
899
00:48:58,935 --> 00:49:00,237
Who's he?
900
00:49:00,270 --> 00:49:01,405
Evening ladies.
901
00:49:01,438 --> 00:49:03,340
There are no boys allowed in this dorm!
902
00:49:03,373 --> 00:49:05,876
That's okay, we're not boys, we're men.
903
00:49:05,909 --> 00:49:08,478
Please Jerry, someone's going to come up here for sure.
904
00:49:08,512 --> 00:49:10,147
Door's locked, isn't it?
905
00:49:10,180 --> 00:49:12,149
You don't look like a Greek god to me.
906
00:49:12,182 --> 00:49:13,850
Greek god? I missed one workout.
907
00:49:13,884 --> 00:49:15,052
Give me a break, okay?
908
00:49:15,085 --> 00:49:16,653
I don't believe this.
909
00:49:16,687 --> 00:49:18,922
We just broke into a girls' dorm room.
910
00:49:18,955 --> 00:49:20,757
Hi! I'm Melanie.
911
00:49:20,791 --> 00:49:22,192
Uh, Theo.
912
00:49:22,225 --> 00:49:24,795
Jerry, if you don't get out of here, I'm calling the guard.
913
00:49:24,828 --> 00:49:26,096
Come on Christy, 30 minutes
914
00:49:26,129 --> 00:49:27,664
and we are out of here.
915
00:49:27,698 --> 00:49:30,467
Word of honor, I absolutely swear,
916
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:32,736
you will not get into trouble.
917
00:49:32,769 --> 00:49:34,037
Are you a pre-vert?
918
00:49:34,071 --> 00:49:35,372
Oh, never on the first date.
919
00:49:35,405 --> 00:49:37,641
Hey, would you guys mind keeping your voices down?
920
00:49:37,674 --> 00:49:39,076
Are you always this nervous?
921
00:49:39,109 --> 00:49:40,944
You guys, we could play some strip Monopoly.
922
00:49:43,714 --> 00:49:44,981
Or regular.
923
00:49:45,015 --> 00:49:48,552
I would like to propose a toast to Virgin High,
924
00:49:48,585 --> 00:49:52,656
to moonlit nights, champagne and viva la difference ,
925
00:49:52,689 --> 00:49:55,792
the tour du force , c'est la vie and soup du jour,
926
00:49:55,826 --> 00:49:58,795
la toure d'Eiffel and whatever the hell else we can think of.
927
00:49:58,829 --> 00:49:59,930
Hasta bazoolo.
928
00:49:59,963 --> 00:50:01,131
Here, here!
929
00:50:08,004 --> 00:50:10,307
Nothing is wrong baby, this is right.
930
00:50:10,340 --> 00:50:11,541
That's why I break a cold sweat
931
00:50:11,575 --> 00:50:13,076
in the middle of the night.
932
00:50:13,110 --> 00:50:15,078
Chilled to the bone, yeah, through and through.
933
00:50:15,112 --> 00:50:17,981
All I want to do is drive all night with you.
934
00:50:18,015 --> 00:50:19,516
Oh, thank you very much.
935
00:50:20,650 --> 00:50:22,452
Thank you. You're too kind.
936
00:50:24,087 --> 00:50:25,522
You're beautiful. Thank you very much.
937
00:50:25,555 --> 00:50:27,891
♪ When you were young and pretty
938
00:50:28,825 --> 00:50:31,495
♪ And I was young and dumb
939
00:50:32,496 --> 00:50:34,865
♪ I used to take you dancing
940
00:50:35,799 --> 00:50:37,868
♪ And act like it was fun
941
00:50:39,202 --> 00:50:41,838
♪ You said you liked my music
942
00:50:42,706 --> 00:50:44,674
♪ You said it was cute
943
00:50:46,176 --> 00:50:47,911
♪ Couldn't make you happy
944
00:50:49,212 --> 00:50:51,982
♪ Didn't bring in the loot
945
00:50:53,083 --> 00:50:55,519
♪ Those days are gone
946
00:50:55,552 --> 00:50:58,388
♪ Those days are gone
947
00:50:59,623 --> 00:51:03,427
♪ I got a new girl and she feels all right
948
00:51:03,460 --> 00:51:06,897
♪ Got a new car gonna drive all night
949
00:51:06,930 --> 00:51:10,100
♪ Feels pretty good, this life at the top
950
00:51:16,840 --> 00:51:20,644
♪ I thought my life was over
951
00:51:20,677 --> 00:51:22,679
♪ When you left me
952
00:51:22,712 --> 00:51:26,450
Well troops we've got $258.
953
00:51:26,483 --> 00:51:29,653
With a little less loafing we could have done better.
954
00:51:29,686 --> 00:51:31,655
Why don't you lighten up, Kathleen?
955
00:51:33,990 --> 00:51:37,894
You may have squandered my money, Murphy,
956
00:51:37,928 --> 00:51:41,398
but I can still crush you like a grape.
957
00:51:42,732 --> 00:51:45,135
Okay, let's get this place cleaned up.
958
00:51:45,168 --> 00:51:47,037
Hut, two, three, four.
959
00:51:49,339 --> 00:51:50,907
Hey, girls how 'bout a wash?
960
00:51:50,941 --> 00:51:52,008
Sorry, we're closed.
961
00:51:52,042 --> 00:51:53,410
It's alright we'll do this one.
962
00:51:53,443 --> 00:51:55,178
Hi sailors, what'll it be?
963
00:51:55,212 --> 00:51:57,814
Give us an around the world with all the trimmings.
964
00:51:57,848 --> 00:51:59,950
Okay girls, give 'em the hose.
965
00:51:59,983 --> 00:52:01,151
Hey that sounds great.
966
00:52:03,753 --> 00:52:06,490
So, Virgin High isn't bad after all, eh?
967
00:52:06,523 --> 00:52:08,358
Well, it ain't Greenland, I'll give it that.
968
00:52:08,391 --> 00:52:11,161
Me thinks thou dost protest too much.
969
00:52:11,194 --> 00:52:12,863
You thinkest that, dost you?
970
00:52:12,896 --> 00:52:15,599
Yep, me also thinks, thou hast a whole new attitude
971
00:52:15,632 --> 00:52:17,334
towards old Jerry these days.
972
00:52:18,468 --> 00:52:20,003
Hey!
973
00:52:21,338 --> 00:52:22,873
Water fight!
974
00:52:33,283 --> 00:52:35,819
No you don't! No water fights.
975
00:52:35,852 --> 00:52:37,487
Do you hear me?
976
00:52:37,521 --> 00:52:40,156
No water fights! Stop this immediately!
977
00:52:42,459 --> 00:52:46,563
Okay fine, act like children, but the first person that gets
978
00:52:46,596 --> 00:52:48,932
a single drop of water on me
979
00:52:58,208 --> 00:53:00,377
Murphy!
980
00:53:00,410 --> 00:53:02,045
I didn't do it.
981
00:53:02,078 --> 00:53:05,482
Don't lie to me you little bitch!
982
00:53:09,586 --> 00:53:11,955
That does it, Murphy.
983
00:53:11,988 --> 00:53:14,691
You're a ghost at this school.
984
00:53:20,530 --> 00:53:22,365
You're not going to blame me for that, are you?
985
00:53:31,741 --> 00:53:33,977
Academy of the Blessed Virgin.
986
00:53:35,712 --> 00:53:37,380
Just a sec.
987
00:53:38,481 --> 00:53:39,983
Murphy!
988
00:53:47,057 --> 00:53:48,124
Hello, Christy!
989
00:53:48,158 --> 00:53:49,392
Oh, hi, Dad!
990
00:53:49,426 --> 00:53:51,461
Who was that nice young lady who answered the phone?
991
00:53:51,494 --> 00:53:52,596
That's Kathleen.
992
00:53:52,629 --> 00:53:55,332
I told you you'd make nice friends.
993
00:53:55,365 --> 00:53:57,667
Friends for life.
994
00:53:57,701 --> 00:53:59,369
So, uh, are you looking forward
995
00:53:59,402 --> 00:54:01,438
to the big formal next week?
996
00:54:01,471 --> 00:54:03,873
Actually, I wasn't even planning on going.
997
00:54:03,907 --> 00:54:06,476
Not going? Of course you're going.
998
00:54:06,509 --> 00:54:08,211
You don't want to miss the big social event
999
00:54:08,244 --> 00:54:09,446
of the year, do you?
1000
00:54:09,479 --> 00:54:12,215
I don't feel like it. Besides I don't even have a date.
1001
00:54:12,249 --> 00:54:13,450
What do you mean?
1002
00:54:13,483 --> 00:54:15,051
Sure you have a date.
1003
00:54:15,085 --> 00:54:16,820
I do?
1004
00:54:16,853 --> 00:54:19,289
I knew you wouldn't be having much contact with boys this
1005
00:54:19,322 --> 00:54:22,192
semester, so I invited Leonard Klappner
1006
00:54:22,225 --> 00:54:23,593
to escort you.
1007
00:54:23,627 --> 00:54:26,830
Leonard Klappner, duh, Dad, I don't think so.
1008
00:54:26,863 --> 00:54:31,501
A fine young man: smart, intelligent, well-mannered
1009
00:54:31,534 --> 00:54:34,838
and need I add, heir to his father's fertilizer empire.
1010
00:54:34,871 --> 00:54:35,972
Dad, I don't think
1011
00:54:36,006 --> 00:54:39,643
Actually, your mother and I might stop by ourselves.
1012
00:54:39,676 --> 00:54:42,612
Uh, I've already discussed it with Sister Felicia and
1013
00:54:42,646 --> 00:54:44,314
she's more than happy to have us.
1014
00:54:44,347 --> 00:54:45,849
Dad, I wasn't even planning
1015
00:54:45,882 --> 00:54:47,517
So, we'll see you at the formal
1016
00:54:47,550 --> 00:54:48,752
and keep up the good work.
1017
00:54:48,785 --> 00:54:50,120
Bye, honey.
1018
00:54:54,224 --> 00:54:56,526
You've been a bad boy!
1019
00:54:56,559 --> 00:54:57,727
Haven't you?
1020
00:54:58,261 --> 00:54:59,462
No, Mommy, no!
1021
00:55:01,431 --> 00:55:03,066
No.
1022
00:56:03,626 --> 00:56:05,862
Oh, God!
1023
00:56:05,895 --> 00:56:10,433
That was the most awesome experience I have
1024
00:56:10,467 --> 00:56:14,471
ever had without the use of a controlled substance.
1025
00:56:14,504 --> 00:56:17,741
Was it as good for you as it was for me, Kathleen?
1026
00:56:18,508 --> 00:56:19,909
I've got it!
1027
00:56:20,744 --> 00:56:22,145
What?
1028
00:56:22,178 --> 00:56:24,380
I should have thought of it earlier,
1029
00:56:24,414 --> 00:56:26,783
but I have definitely got it.
1030
00:56:28,118 --> 00:56:30,487
You told me those tests came back negative!
1031
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:34,290
Not that sweet vacuum skull.
1032
00:56:34,324 --> 00:56:37,127
I figured out a way we can get Murphy.
1033
00:56:37,794 --> 00:56:40,130
We?
1034
00:56:40,163 --> 00:56:44,401
Now you told me you were an expert with explosives, right?
1035
00:56:44,434 --> 00:56:46,836
Not exactly. I told you that once in high school
1036
00:56:46,870 --> 00:56:48,705
I cherry bombed the girls' john.
1037
00:56:48,738 --> 00:56:49,973
Well, whatever.
1038
00:56:50,006 --> 00:56:53,877
I figure we take your expertise
1039
00:56:53,910 --> 00:56:55,979
and combine it with my expertise in painting.
1040
00:56:57,380 --> 00:57:00,216
And with a little help from the Happy Whip company
1041
00:57:00,250 --> 00:57:04,254
we'll give young Miss Murphy a send-off to remember.
1042
00:57:05,388 --> 00:57:06,523
What are you scheming?
1043
00:57:06,556 --> 00:57:09,259
I don't like the sound of this at all.
1044
00:57:09,292 --> 00:57:11,194
Derek, honey,
1045
00:57:11,227 --> 00:57:16,199
have you ever made love in a Jacuzzi full of Jell-O
1046
00:57:16,232 --> 00:57:19,169
with a full set of leather accessories
1047
00:57:19,202 --> 00:57:23,506
and the Brandenburg Concerto playing at high volume?
1048
00:57:24,741 --> 00:57:25,909
No.
1049
00:57:25,942 --> 00:57:27,610
Do you think you'd like to?
1050
00:57:27,844 --> 00:57:28,878
Yes.
1051
00:57:29,612 --> 00:57:31,714
But not at any price.
1052
00:57:31,748 --> 00:57:33,683
I do have principles you know.
1053
00:57:33,716 --> 00:57:35,351
Yes, the same principles
1054
00:57:35,385 --> 00:57:38,421
the nuns will respect and admire you for,
1055
00:57:39,789 --> 00:57:43,560
if they ever find out, God forbid, that you've been
1056
00:57:43,593 --> 00:57:48,965
porking one of their sweet innocent little angels.
1057
00:57:48,998 --> 00:57:51,234
What do I do and when do we start.
1058
00:58:17,760 --> 00:58:20,597
So you studs ready for the big night?
1059
00:58:20,630 --> 00:58:23,566
Hell yeah, Jer. I even bought some pope-a-lactics.
1060
00:58:23,600 --> 00:58:26,469
I can't believe you tried every one of them on.
1061
00:58:26,502 --> 00:58:28,137
They're one size fits all.
1062
00:58:28,171 --> 00:58:29,572
Sounded fishy to me.
1063
00:58:29,606 --> 00:58:32,909
So, Jer, I can't believe you're not going to this party.
1064
00:58:34,110 --> 00:58:35,178
As much as it hurts,
1065
00:58:35,211 --> 00:58:38,548
sometimes you just have to face the truth.
1066
00:58:38,581 --> 00:58:40,450
I just wasn't invited.
1067
00:58:41,551 --> 00:58:43,353
Heavy.
1068
00:58:43,386 --> 00:58:45,188
Anyway, Jer, got any pointers on helping me
1069
00:58:45,221 --> 00:58:46,656
get this girl to give out?
1070
00:58:47,390 --> 00:58:48,458
Give out?
1071
00:58:48,491 --> 00:58:50,660
You know, shut up or put down!
1072
00:58:53,096 --> 00:58:54,464
Hide the baloney, okay?
1073
00:58:55,064 --> 00:58:57,634
Now, Zoom, babe,
1074
00:58:57,667 --> 00:58:59,435
you have to understand that women have a completely
1075
00:58:59,469 --> 00:59:01,638
different perspective on things than say,
1076
00:59:01,671 --> 00:59:05,675
you, me, or even Theo over here.
1077
00:59:05,708 --> 00:59:08,278
So what you gotta do is be prepared.
1078
00:59:08,311 --> 00:59:11,381
Now you already bought the raincoats and that's good.
1079
00:59:11,414 --> 00:59:12,649
But if it goes that far,
1080
00:59:12,682 --> 00:59:14,550
be shocked to find them in your wallet.
1081
00:59:14,584 --> 00:59:17,153
Like, say maybe I must have planted it there.
1082
00:59:17,186 --> 00:59:20,089
Never let the chick know that the whole thing
1083
00:59:20,123 --> 00:59:21,291
was premeditated.
1084
00:59:21,324 --> 00:59:24,093
Oh yeah, right, take it from Dr. Pocket Pool over there.
1085
00:59:24,727 --> 00:59:26,496
Contrary to Theo's belief,
1086
00:59:26,529 --> 00:59:28,865
the five knuckle shuffle does not grow hair on your palms.
1087
00:59:31,834 --> 00:59:34,938
Listen, women love to talk.
1088
00:59:34,971 --> 00:59:36,572
So talk to her.
1089
00:59:36,606 --> 00:59:40,376
Use big words, talk about the environment, Jane Fonda.
1090
00:59:40,410 --> 00:59:42,045
Bullshit like that.
1091
00:59:42,078 --> 00:59:46,182
And if all else fails, go for the cones.
1092
00:59:46,215 --> 00:59:47,884
At least you'll go down fighting.
1093
01:00:00,697 --> 01:00:02,899
Come on Christy, you should be excited like we are.
1094
01:00:02,932 --> 01:00:03,967
It's going to be fun.
1095
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:05,368
That's easy for you to say.
1096
01:00:05,401 --> 01:00:07,103
You're not going with Leonard Klappner.
1097
01:00:07,136 --> 01:00:09,205
He can't be that bad, can he?
1098
01:00:11,341 --> 01:00:13,576
Okay. But at least you can have fun.
1099
01:00:13,609 --> 01:00:15,545
There's going to be dancing and food.
1100
01:00:15,578 --> 01:00:17,680
You can't keep moping about Jerry forever.
1101
01:00:17,714 --> 01:00:19,215
I'm not really moping.
1102
01:00:19,248 --> 01:00:22,018
I'm just wondering if maybe I was a too hard on him.
1103
01:00:22,051 --> 01:00:24,053
I mean the water fight really wasn't his fault.
1104
01:00:24,087 --> 01:00:25,254
Zoomer started it.
1105
01:00:25,288 --> 01:00:26,456
I know.
1106
01:00:26,489 --> 01:00:28,124
You think maybe I should give him another chance?
1107
01:00:28,157 --> 01:00:30,326
I don't know.
1108
01:00:30,360 --> 01:00:32,562
But this is not the time to think about it.
1109
01:00:32,595 --> 01:00:34,897
Now, are you going to get over here and be
1110
01:00:34,931 --> 01:00:35,932
frivolous with us or not?
1111
01:00:37,200 --> 01:00:38,301
Sure.
1112
01:00:41,537 --> 01:00:43,473
You keep barging in here like that and we're gonna
1113
01:00:43,506 --> 01:00:45,174
have to start locking the door.
1114
01:00:45,208 --> 01:00:47,377
I'm sorry.
1115
01:00:47,410 --> 01:00:48,811
Actually, I came here because
1116
01:00:48,845 --> 01:00:51,447
I have something to say to Christy.
1117
01:00:55,151 --> 01:00:57,520
Christy, I'm sorry.
1118
01:00:58,755 --> 01:01:00,056
Excuse me?
1119
01:01:00,089 --> 01:01:02,792
I just feel like such a jackass.
1120
01:01:02,825 --> 01:01:04,494
I've been thinking about it all week
1121
01:01:04,527 --> 01:01:07,263
and I just feel like dirt for the things I've said to you.
1122
01:01:08,664 --> 01:01:10,033
Did the nuns send you over here?
1123
01:01:10,066 --> 01:01:11,634
No!
1124
01:01:11,667 --> 01:01:15,405
I just realized why I've been so mean to you.
1125
01:01:15,805 --> 01:01:17,140
Why?
1126
01:01:17,173 --> 01:01:19,342
Because I was jealous of you,
1127
01:01:19,375 --> 01:01:20,777
all of you!
1128
01:01:20,810 --> 01:01:22,979
I mean you're all such great friends
1129
01:01:23,012 --> 01:01:25,248
and I never had that.
1130
01:01:25,281 --> 01:01:28,518
I mean, and then I realized
1131
01:01:28,551 --> 01:01:31,187
that the reason I don't have any friends
1132
01:01:31,220 --> 01:01:34,390
is because I am such a bitch!
1133
01:01:34,424 --> 01:01:36,526
Can you imagine that?
1134
01:01:36,559 --> 01:01:39,529
So I decided from this day forward,
1135
01:01:39,562 --> 01:01:41,497
I'm cleaning up my act.
1136
01:01:41,531 --> 01:01:44,801
No more threats, no more nastiness,
1137
01:01:44,834 --> 01:01:47,003
just goodness and light
1138
01:01:47,036 --> 01:01:49,138
and goodwill toward all.
1139
01:01:49,172 --> 01:01:51,107
What do you say?
1140
01:01:51,874 --> 01:01:53,309
Great!
1141
01:01:54,310 --> 01:01:56,412
Attention, Christy,
1142
01:01:56,446 --> 01:01:57,847
do not be fooled,
1143
01:01:57,880 --> 01:02:00,249
she is a lying bitch
1144
01:02:00,283 --> 01:02:02,618
and cannot be trusted.
1145
01:02:03,219 --> 01:02:04,587
That is all.
1146
01:02:05,822 --> 01:02:07,090
Well, I was thinking.
1147
01:02:07,123 --> 01:02:10,259
We should take up a collection and buy a gift for the school.
1148
01:02:11,194 --> 01:02:12,995
Oh, the other day
1149
01:02:13,029 --> 01:02:16,432
I saw this painting of the Blessed Virgin
1150
01:02:16,466 --> 01:02:19,669
that would be just perfect.
1151
01:02:19,702 --> 01:02:22,271
And then we write a little inscription on the bottom.
1152
01:02:22,305 --> 01:02:25,341
And then somebody gives a, a speech at the formal.
1153
01:02:25,374 --> 01:02:26,976
I don't know
1154
01:02:28,277 --> 01:02:30,179
You, Christy!
1155
01:02:30,213 --> 01:02:33,015
And then we'll have the grand unveiling!
1156
01:02:33,649 --> 01:02:34,951
How does that sound?
1157
01:02:36,486 --> 01:02:38,921
Sure, we can go with that.
1158
01:02:38,955 --> 01:02:42,458
Great! Oh this is just going to be super.
1159
01:02:42,492 --> 01:02:45,061
Just like the four Musketettes!
1160
01:02:54,403 --> 01:02:55,471
Hey, hey Jose.
1161
01:02:55,505 --> 01:02:57,006
Zoomer. It's a formal.
1162
01:02:57,039 --> 01:02:59,008
You're supposed to rent a tux.
1163
01:02:59,041 --> 01:03:01,310
Hey I haven't got that kind of cash-ola.
1164
01:03:01,344 --> 01:03:04,180
Besides, I wanted to do the casual thing.
1165
01:03:04,213 --> 01:03:05,414
Damn! I don't believe
1166
01:03:05,448 --> 01:03:07,350
I forgot to order Melanie a corsage.
1167
01:03:07,917 --> 01:03:09,051
What?
1168
01:03:09,085 --> 01:03:11,521
There was only one left and some prom clown
1169
01:03:11,554 --> 01:03:13,289
snaked it before I could.
1170
01:03:14,457 --> 01:03:16,259
Oh, totally uncool.
1171
01:03:16,292 --> 01:03:19,162
You don't want your babe to think you're some kind of wimp, do ya?
1172
01:03:19,195 --> 01:03:21,664
I was going to spend $10 on that too.
1173
01:03:22,732 --> 01:03:25,034
Well, maybe, but I didn't bring one.
1174
01:03:25,067 --> 01:03:27,570
My babe would have slapped me.
1175
01:03:27,603 --> 01:03:28,838
You want me to look bad?
1176
01:03:28,871 --> 01:03:30,406
It was refrigerated and everything.
1177
01:03:33,075 --> 01:03:35,278
This doesn't feel right. Jerry should be with us.
1178
01:03:35,311 --> 01:03:36,412
Where's my hat?
1179
01:03:36,445 --> 01:03:38,447
Maybe it's best that he's not here this time.
1180
01:03:38,481 --> 01:03:41,884
Hey, hey, hey, Jose! He's our bud.
1181
01:03:43,486 --> 01:03:44,487
Yeah.
1182
01:03:46,055 --> 01:03:47,290
You think he's bumming?
1183
01:03:48,524 --> 01:03:50,493
Probably.
1184
01:03:50,526 --> 01:03:52,361
Hey, why don't we jam over to his place,
1185
01:03:52,395 --> 01:03:53,729
cheer him up and then ask him if he wants
1186
01:03:53,763 --> 01:03:54,897
to crash it with us.
1187
01:03:54,931 --> 01:03:57,433
Well, he's not crashing it with us,
1188
01:03:57,466 --> 01:03:59,569
but we could see how he's doing.
1189
01:03:59,602 --> 01:04:01,604
We're gonna be late to pick up the girls!
1190
01:04:01,637 --> 01:04:03,573
Let them wait, we're studs!
1191
01:04:07,610 --> 01:04:10,213
Theo, really, where's my hat?
1192
01:04:44,213 --> 01:04:45,281
Entrez .
1193
01:04:46,315 --> 01:04:47,850
Hey, hey, Jose!
1194
01:04:48,417 --> 01:04:49,485
So how do we look?
1195
01:04:51,020 --> 01:04:52,855
You look like a couple of gonads.
1196
01:04:52,888 --> 01:04:54,557
Oh, thanks. We love you too.
1197
01:04:54,590 --> 01:04:56,025
What are you guys doing here?
1198
01:04:56,058 --> 01:04:58,361
We just wanted to come and cheer you up a little.
1199
01:04:58,394 --> 01:05:01,097
By reminding me that you two dorkuses have dates
1200
01:05:01,130 --> 01:05:04,100
for the formal while I, the wizard of studliness,
1201
01:05:04,133 --> 01:05:06,102
get to stay home with the Mario Brothers?
1202
01:05:06,135 --> 01:05:07,937
Thanks a lot, that's very thoughtful.
1203
01:05:07,970 --> 01:05:09,472
Jesus, Jer, lighten up.
1204
01:05:09,505 --> 01:05:11,307
It's not like you to be so depressed.
1205
01:05:11,340 --> 01:05:12,375
Yeah, in fact, I can't believe
1206
01:05:12,408 --> 01:05:14,110
you've given up on Christy so easy.
1207
01:05:14,143 --> 01:05:16,445
She's right Zoom. I'm bad luck for her.
1208
01:05:16,479 --> 01:05:19,382
Some things are just not meant to be.
1209
01:05:19,415 --> 01:05:20,650
Would you listen to this?
1210
01:05:20,683 --> 01:05:22,485
The wizard of studliness.
1211
01:05:22,518 --> 01:05:25,054
No, look, you guys just go.
1212
01:05:25,087 --> 01:05:26,689
Have a great time.
1213
01:05:26,722 --> 01:05:29,892
I'd rather slit my wrists in private anyway, okay?
1214
01:05:30,693 --> 01:05:31,827
Oh, that's great. I mean,
1215
01:05:31,861 --> 01:05:33,729
I know we're gonna have a blast now.
1216
01:05:33,763 --> 01:05:37,333
Just kidding, no listen guys, just go ahead, just go.
1217
01:05:37,366 --> 01:05:39,902
Come on, Jer. We can't, we can't leave you like this.
1218
01:05:39,935 --> 01:05:41,504
You're not leaving me like anything.
1219
01:05:41,537 --> 01:05:42,972
Just go.
1220
01:05:43,005 --> 01:05:45,341
Come on, Jerry, we'll get a little tapioca pudding,
1221
01:05:45,374 --> 01:05:47,310
some babes, a little baby oil,
1222
01:05:47,343 --> 01:05:48,711
put them in a little swimming pool.
1223
01:05:48,744 --> 01:05:50,112
We'll get real dirty.
1224
01:05:51,180 --> 01:05:52,581
Bye.
1225
01:05:52,615 --> 01:05:54,650
Oh, Jesus. Let's get out of here.
1226
01:05:58,187 --> 01:06:00,122
What a couple of geeks! Brawk!
1227
01:06:18,474 --> 01:06:20,176
Are you boys just about ready?
1228
01:06:20,209 --> 01:06:21,310
Any time, Sister.
1229
01:06:21,344 --> 01:06:23,479
Oh, good. Here's your list of songs.
1230
01:06:23,946 --> 01:06:25,548
List?
1231
01:06:25,581 --> 01:06:28,417
Tie A Yellow Ribbon? Kum By Ya?
1232
01:06:29,919 --> 01:06:32,021
You really expect us to play this stuff?
1233
01:06:32,054 --> 01:06:34,857
Well, of course. Why not?
1234
01:06:34,890 --> 01:06:37,593
Well, you know, It's not our type of thing. You know?
1235
01:06:37,626 --> 01:06:40,663
Oh, now, now young man. Let's not forget
1236
01:06:40,696 --> 01:06:43,099
who's paying the piper tonight?
1237
01:06:49,472 --> 01:06:51,407
That's not on the list.
1238
01:06:53,342 --> 01:06:55,511
Good evening, Sister Felicia!
1239
01:06:55,544 --> 01:06:57,680
Oh, hi, Kathleen.
1240
01:06:57,713 --> 01:06:59,582
I can't tell you what an
1241
01:06:59,615 --> 01:07:02,918
enormous pleasure it is to be here this fine evening.
1242
01:07:02,952 --> 01:07:04,353
That's nice.
1243
01:07:05,221 --> 01:07:07,423
Is there anything I can help you with?
1244
01:07:07,456 --> 01:07:12,061
No, no, you and your date just go and have a good time.
1245
01:07:12,094 --> 01:07:13,996
Well, I don't have a date.
1246
01:07:14,029 --> 01:07:16,899
I don't plan to date until I'm 21.
1247
01:07:16,932 --> 01:07:19,502
I'm saving myself for my husband.
1248
01:07:19,535 --> 01:07:21,404
Really?
1249
01:07:21,437 --> 01:07:25,741
That certainly is a refreshing notion in this day and age.
1250
01:07:31,981 --> 01:07:34,116
Hi, guys and girls!
1251
01:07:34,150 --> 01:07:35,484
Hi, Sister.
1252
01:07:35,518 --> 01:07:38,287
Are you kids all set to get in there and boogi-oogie?
1253
01:07:38,320 --> 01:07:41,524
Oh, yes, ma'am. We're ready to get uptight, out of sight
1254
01:07:41,557 --> 01:07:43,626
I want to you to remember the rules: there will be
1255
01:07:43,659 --> 01:07:47,863
no loud talking, no slurping the punch, no close dancing,
1256
01:07:47,897 --> 01:07:51,767
and keep both feet on the floor at all times.
1257
01:07:51,801 --> 01:07:53,969
Now, you kids get in there and enjoy yourselves.
1258
01:07:54,003 --> 01:07:55,404
Yes, Sister.
1259
01:07:58,874 --> 01:08:00,342
Whoo-whoo!
1260
01:08:08,484 --> 01:08:10,553
You got all the stuff in place?
1261
01:08:10,586 --> 01:08:15,324
Mmm-hmm, and I got a little something extra.
1262
01:08:15,357 --> 01:08:18,994
You idiot. Do you want to blow the whole thing?
1263
01:08:20,863 --> 01:08:23,165
I just thought that you and I would get together later,
1264
01:08:23,199 --> 01:08:24,366
that's all.
1265
01:08:24,400 --> 01:08:25,534
Well, it's too risky.
1266
01:08:25,568 --> 01:08:28,838
Just get rid of it and meet me in the storage room.
1267
01:08:42,218 --> 01:08:44,353
Oh, Sister Romona!
1268
01:08:44,386 --> 01:08:47,323
Oh, look at the boys and girls having such a good time.
1269
01:08:47,356 --> 01:08:48,424
Isn't this fun?
1270
01:08:48,457 --> 01:08:52,094
Yes, it, it truly is a lovely party, Mommy!
1271
01:08:52,127 --> 01:08:53,429
Oh, ho!
1272
01:08:53,462 --> 01:08:55,698
Well now we better make sure that they do behave them
1273
01:08:55,731 --> 01:08:57,967
Oh, look, look at that couple over there, Sister.
1274
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,203
Just a little too close. You take care of it.
1275
01:09:01,237 --> 01:09:03,405
Go get them, Sister Romona!
1276
01:09:03,439 --> 01:09:05,908
So, I figured I'd gamble, right?
1277
01:09:05,941 --> 01:09:08,511
Grab the old five iron and lofted
1278
01:09:08,544 --> 01:09:11,147
a perfect fader around the tree.
1279
01:09:12,481 --> 01:09:16,452
Bit the green like a piranha, rolled uphill
1280
01:09:16,485 --> 01:09:20,389
and bingo, in the cup, 180 yards!
1281
01:09:20,422 --> 01:09:22,124
Can you believe that?
1282
01:09:22,157 --> 01:09:24,126
That's awesome, Leonard.
1283
01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:25,961
Next week I'm gonna get a new set of Pings.
1284
01:09:34,904 --> 01:09:36,805
Yo! Sister!
1285
01:09:36,839 --> 01:09:38,440
Leonard Klappner!
1286
01:09:38,474 --> 01:09:40,509
How do you do, Leonard? Hello, Christy.
1287
01:09:40,543 --> 01:09:41,710
Sister.
1288
01:09:41,744 --> 01:09:45,114
Your folks, they haven't arrived yet, have they?
1289
01:09:45,147 --> 01:09:47,283
No, but they should be here pretty soon.
1290
01:09:47,316 --> 01:09:50,319
Now, I'm sure there's no need to remind you
1291
01:09:50,352 --> 01:09:52,721
how important it is you make a good impression
1292
01:09:52,755 --> 01:09:53,789
on them tonight.
1293
01:09:53,822 --> 01:09:57,459
Hey! With me how could things go wrong?
1294
01:09:59,361 --> 01:10:01,764
Good! It's phenomenal!
1295
01:10:01,797 --> 01:10:04,266
I can't wait to see the look on Murphy's face when she
1296
01:10:04,300 --> 01:10:08,003
gets in front of the whole school and unveils this.
1297
01:10:09,071 --> 01:10:12,374
You are a real devil, Kathleen.
1298
01:10:13,742 --> 01:10:15,578
You got the cherry bombs?
1299
01:10:15,611 --> 01:10:17,580
Yeah. All hooked up and ready to blow.
1300
01:10:17,613 --> 01:10:19,949
All I have to do is set the timer.
1301
01:10:21,784 --> 01:10:23,385
And the whip cream.
1302
01:10:24,253 --> 01:10:26,121
Ah, I can't wait.
1303
01:10:27,289 --> 01:10:29,358
Now the presentation is at 10:00 p.m.
1304
01:10:29,391 --> 01:10:32,528
So you meet me back here at five of, sharp!
1305
01:10:32,561 --> 01:10:34,930
You got it?
1306
01:10:34,964 --> 01:10:37,232
Anything for you, honey dumplings.
1307
01:10:55,851 --> 01:10:57,987
Heck of a party, eh, Sister?
1308
01:10:58,020 --> 01:11:00,222
Your Excellency, you made it!
1309
01:11:00,255 --> 01:11:02,324
Well I wouldn't want to miss your big event.
1310
01:11:03,025 --> 01:11:04,927
Any sign of you know who?
1311
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:07,263
No, and I don't know what's keeping them.
1312
01:11:07,296 --> 01:11:09,198
I'd hate to see them back out now.
1313
01:11:09,231 --> 01:11:11,166
We wouldn't want this to be your last hurrah,
1314
01:11:11,200 --> 01:11:12,234
now would we?
1315
01:11:12,267 --> 01:11:14,069
We certainly wouldn't, Bishop.
1316
01:11:23,579 --> 01:11:26,982
Sister Felicia, what's in this punch?
1317
01:11:27,583 --> 01:11:28,751
What's in it?
1318
01:11:28,784 --> 01:11:32,955
Well it's sherbet, fruit punch all the usual stuff. Why?
1319
01:11:34,356 --> 01:11:37,660
It's excellent. I've never tasted anything like it.
1320
01:11:37,693 --> 01:11:39,795
Oh really? I'll have to have some.
1321
01:11:39,828 --> 01:11:41,630
Oh, yes, please.
1322
01:11:42,564 --> 01:11:43,832
Ahh!
1323
01:11:50,906 --> 01:11:52,107
Can I help you, young man?
1324
01:11:52,141 --> 01:11:53,909
No I'm just here to take a few pictures.
1325
01:11:53,942 --> 01:11:55,811
I'm sorry, I don't remember hearing anything
1326
01:11:55,844 --> 01:11:57,579
about a photographer.
1327
01:11:57,613 --> 01:12:00,649
Listen, ma'am, all I know is the school already paid for
1328
01:12:00,683 --> 01:12:03,152
the service and the studio sent me over here.
1329
01:12:03,185 --> 01:12:04,820
I can either do it or not.
1330
01:12:04,853 --> 01:12:07,523
It doesn't matter to me.
1331
01:12:07,556 --> 01:12:09,992
Well, all right, if we paid for it.
1332
01:12:26,308 --> 01:12:28,077
Now the way I see it,
1333
01:12:28,110 --> 01:12:29,378
with your looks
1334
01:12:29,411 --> 01:12:32,348
and my brains and looks,
1335
01:12:32,381 --> 01:12:35,250
we could produce a whole litter of super achievers!
1336
01:12:39,254 --> 01:12:43,125
You want my studley body, I mean, admit it.
1337
01:12:43,158 --> 01:12:46,061
Leonard, don't make me put a footprint in your scrotum.
1338
01:12:46,095 --> 01:12:47,963
It wouldn't be pretty.
1339
01:12:50,265 --> 01:12:52,267
I love it when you talk violent.
1340
01:12:53,469 --> 01:12:54,470
Mmm!
1341
01:12:55,270 --> 01:12:56,972
Where are those Murphys?
1342
01:12:59,842 --> 01:13:03,679
Oh, Dick, isn't this romantic?
1343
01:13:03,712 --> 01:13:06,348
It reminds me of our very first date.
1344
01:13:07,750 --> 01:13:09,651
We went to Arby's on our first date.
1345
01:13:09,685 --> 01:13:11,587
No that was our second.
1346
01:13:12,554 --> 01:13:15,257
My prom was our first.
1347
01:13:15,958 --> 01:13:18,660
Now seeing it all here again,
1348
01:13:18,694 --> 01:13:20,496
it just makes me want to
1349
01:13:20,529 --> 01:13:22,498
Ooh, you know what.
1350
01:13:22,531 --> 01:13:24,366
Margaret, please!
1351
01:13:24,400 --> 01:13:26,935
This a proper gathering.
1352
01:13:27,536 --> 01:13:28,670
Save it for later.
1353
01:13:39,381 --> 01:13:42,518
Boy, oh, boy, Sister! If you could bottle this stuff
1354
01:13:42,551 --> 01:13:46,121
and sell it, your money troubles would be over.
1355
01:13:46,155 --> 01:13:49,391
It sure beats and car sales and bake washes.
1356
01:13:49,424 --> 01:13:50,692
Ahh! Yeah!
1357
01:13:50,726 --> 01:13:52,995
Good evening, folks.
1358
01:13:53,028 --> 01:13:56,031
Well, well, if it isn't Mr. and Mrs. Moneybags.
1359
01:13:57,733 --> 01:14:00,068
I beg your pardon?
1360
01:14:00,102 --> 01:14:03,071
Excuse us, Mr. Murphy, we're all just on kind of
1361
01:14:03,105 --> 01:14:05,307
natural high tonight.
1362
01:14:05,340 --> 01:14:06,508
Here try some punch. Oh, thanks.
1363
01:14:10,646 --> 01:14:13,649
I think you all be very pleased with the little
1364
01:14:13,682 --> 01:14:14,917
piece of paper I brought
1365
01:14:14,950 --> 01:14:16,318
here to hand over to you tonight.
1366
01:14:16,351 --> 01:14:18,353
Oh, Mr. Murphy!
1367
01:14:18,387 --> 01:14:20,289
I know that God is saving
1368
01:14:20,322 --> 01:14:22,925
a special place in heaven for you.
1369
01:14:24,560 --> 01:14:26,028
Holy shit!
1370
01:14:26,061 --> 01:14:29,932
I mean, wow, this punch is fantastic.
1371
01:14:31,467 --> 01:14:33,669
Margaret, try some, try some, Margaret.
1372
01:14:33,702 --> 01:14:35,037
Smile everybody.
1373
01:14:37,806 --> 01:14:40,342
Do you believe in pre-marital interdigitation?
1374
01:14:40,375 --> 01:14:41,577
No way!
1375
01:14:41,610 --> 01:14:43,178
What's that?
1376
01:14:43,212 --> 01:14:45,948
Do you believe in pre-marital oscullation?
1377
01:14:45,981 --> 01:14:47,883
You really are a pre-vert, aren't you?
1378
01:14:47,916 --> 01:14:49,418
Hey, don't knock it until you've tried it.
1379
01:14:51,053 --> 01:14:53,455
Jesus! Pardon my goose.
1380
01:14:53,489 --> 01:14:54,857
Have you guys seen Christy anywhere?
1381
01:14:54,890 --> 01:14:56,258
Because I have to find her right away.
1382
01:14:56,291 --> 01:14:57,426
She's around here someplace.
1383
01:14:57,459 --> 01:14:59,495
I'm don't know if she wants to see you though.
1384
01:14:59,528 --> 01:15:02,564
Hey does Jerry Kaminski know what he's doing or what?
1385
01:15:02,598 --> 01:15:04,666
Tell her, Theo.
1386
01:15:04,700 --> 01:15:06,668
He's got no idea what he's doing.
1387
01:15:08,403 --> 01:15:14,443
Oh, Dick, I just feel so warm and gooey inside.
1388
01:15:14,476 --> 01:15:17,880
I could just beat the hell out of you!
1389
01:15:17,913 --> 01:15:20,449
No, please, Margaret, not now.
1390
01:15:20,482 --> 01:15:23,318
All right, baby. Whoo! Sorry, folks.
1391
01:15:24,753 --> 01:15:27,055
Hey, hey! Hey, hey!
1392
01:15:27,089 --> 01:15:28,590
Hey, young love birds.
1393
01:15:28,624 --> 01:15:29,992
Hi, Dad, hi, Mom.
1394
01:15:30,025 --> 01:15:31,727
Are you having a good time?
1395
01:15:31,760 --> 01:15:33,795
You bet we are, sir. I mean,
1396
01:15:33,829 --> 01:15:35,297
I may just have to take this young girl off
1397
01:15:35,330 --> 01:15:37,132
your hands one of these days.
1398
01:15:47,509 --> 01:15:48,577
Well, Christy,
1399
01:15:48,610 --> 01:15:51,446
it seems they finally made a young lady out of you.
1400
01:15:51,480 --> 01:15:53,615
I trust you're not going to blow it.
1401
01:15:53,649 --> 01:15:57,085
Come on, Margaret, let's get some more of that punch.
1402
01:16:00,222 --> 01:16:01,957
All right!
1403
01:16:04,793 --> 01:16:06,261
Ahh.
1404
01:16:15,704 --> 01:16:16,738
Ow!
1405
01:16:16,772 --> 01:16:18,073
Thank you, Sister.
1406
01:16:18,106 --> 01:16:19,141
Christy!
1407
01:16:19,174 --> 01:16:20,342
Hi.
1408
01:16:20,375 --> 01:16:22,577
The presentation is going to be any minute now.
1409
01:16:22,611 --> 01:16:24,613
Are you all set to do your thing?
1410
01:16:24,646 --> 01:16:25,681
I think so.
1411
01:16:25,714 --> 01:16:28,850
Wow! This is going to be all time.
1412
01:16:28,884 --> 01:16:31,553
I'm going to go set everything up. All right.
1413
01:16:31,587 --> 01:16:34,856
Leonard! Why don't you go take a cold shower?
1414
01:16:36,725 --> 01:16:38,327
Yo, baby!
1415
01:16:39,127 --> 01:16:40,896
To the Academy!
1416
01:16:44,399 --> 01:16:46,134
Hey take one of us!
1417
01:16:49,304 --> 01:16:50,739
Leonard, will you knock it off!
1418
01:16:50,772 --> 01:16:52,474
Oh, momma!
1419
01:16:52,507 --> 01:16:54,076
Damn it, Leonard!
1420
01:16:54,443 --> 01:16:55,510
Oh, no.
1421
01:16:55,544 --> 01:16:58,246
What? Not tonight of all nights.
1422
01:16:58,981 --> 01:17:00,916
Who? The photographer?
1423
01:17:00,949 --> 01:17:03,352
I should have known he'd show up here.
1424
01:17:03,385 --> 01:17:05,053
You want me to kick his ass?
1425
01:17:05,087 --> 01:17:08,190
No Leonard, just block his view and don't let him see me.
1426
01:17:08,223 --> 01:17:09,257
Oh!
1427
01:17:13,562 --> 01:17:14,796
Psst!
1428
01:17:34,316 --> 01:17:35,450
One more toast!
1429
01:17:35,484 --> 01:17:36,852
To our hero!
1430
01:17:40,856 --> 01:17:43,592
Oh, that's our cue. Come on campers!
1431
01:17:43,625 --> 01:17:45,527
Let's go, Sister Fellatio!
1432
01:17:54,036 --> 01:17:55,670
Hi, everybody.
1433
01:17:55,704 --> 01:17:58,373
Hi, Sister Felicia.
1434
01:17:58,407 --> 01:18:00,409
Are we all having fun?
1435
01:18:00,442 --> 01:18:02,310
Mmm.
1436
01:18:02,344 --> 01:18:05,213
Oh, you can do better than that!
1437
01:18:05,247 --> 01:18:07,949
Come on, are we all having fun?
1438
01:18:07,983 --> 01:18:10,052
Mmm.
1439
01:18:10,085 --> 01:18:11,086
That's better.
1440
01:18:11,920 --> 01:18:15,457
Well, first a few announcements.
1441
01:18:15,490 --> 01:18:17,159
The field hockey team is
1442
01:18:17,192 --> 01:18:21,463
playing St. Elizabeth's for 6th place next Tuesday.
1443
01:18:21,496 --> 01:18:23,732
It's already started. Hurry up!
1444
01:18:24,666 --> 01:18:25,934
Hurry Up! Damn it!
1445
01:18:25,967 --> 01:18:28,070
I'm going as fast as I can.
1446
01:18:28,737 --> 01:18:30,372
And don't forget,
1447
01:18:30,405 --> 01:18:33,975
there's an extra confession scheduled for tomorrow
1448
01:18:34,009 --> 01:18:38,647
for those of us that have had too much fun tonight!
1449
01:18:39,714 --> 01:18:41,383
Oh, yeah!
1450
01:18:59,468 --> 01:19:01,670
Woo! That was wild.
1451
01:19:03,371 --> 01:19:07,476
Well, now we have some wonderful news
1452
01:19:07,509 --> 01:19:10,011
for the Academy tonight.
1453
01:19:10,045 --> 01:19:15,183
I'm going to hand it over to Mr. Dick Murphy
1454
01:19:15,217 --> 01:19:17,052
to tell us all about it.
1455
01:19:17,085 --> 01:19:18,754
Mr. Murphy.
1456
01:19:25,627 --> 01:19:27,562
Thank you.
1457
01:19:27,596 --> 01:19:29,464
Is this working?
1458
01:19:31,233 --> 01:19:33,034
Sister Felicia,
1459
01:19:33,969 --> 01:19:35,637
Bishop Haughness,
1460
01:19:35,670 --> 01:19:37,839
students and friends,
1461
01:19:38,707 --> 01:19:42,844
on behalf of the Gelt Gouger Foundation
1462
01:19:42,878 --> 01:19:46,014
and in recognition of your school's achievements,
1463
01:19:46,047 --> 01:19:50,152
I'd like to present you with this check
1464
01:19:50,185 --> 01:19:53,622
for $350,000.
1465
01:20:06,134 --> 01:20:10,238
Oh, thank you, thank you so much Mr. Murphy
1466
01:20:10,272 --> 01:20:14,376
or as you will always be known to us, St. Dick.
1467
01:20:23,818 --> 01:20:27,556
Well, next on the agenda we're going to
1468
01:20:31,993 --> 01:20:36,064
Before Bishop Haughness says a few words to us,
1469
01:20:36,097 --> 01:20:37,332
I've been told that there's
1470
01:20:37,365 --> 01:20:39,034
one more important announcement.
1471
01:20:39,067 --> 01:20:40,669
Christy, come on.
1472
01:20:44,472 --> 01:20:47,175
Um, because the Academy has been such a
1473
01:20:47,209 --> 01:20:50,345
special place for us to go to school, the senior girls would
1474
01:20:50,378 --> 01:20:53,682
like to dedicate a small token of our esteem to the Academy.
1475
01:20:53,715 --> 01:20:55,917
Sister, your Excellency,
1476
01:20:58,620 --> 01:21:00,522
a few words in parting
1477
01:21:00,555 --> 01:21:01,923
Did I mention what a great group
1478
01:21:01,957 --> 01:21:03,558
of seniors we had this year?
1479
01:21:03,592 --> 01:21:05,694
What the heck is she talking about?
1480
01:21:10,232 --> 01:21:12,334
Get Kathleen up there!
1481
01:21:12,367 --> 01:21:14,603
Kathleen, yes, Kathleen,
1482
01:21:14,636 --> 01:21:16,605
let's get our very own Kathleen up here.
1483
01:21:16,638 --> 01:21:19,975
No, no way, I can't I have nothing prepared.
1484
01:21:20,008 --> 01:21:22,510
Stage fright. I have stage fright, okay?
1485
01:21:22,544 --> 01:21:24,045
Oh, come on Kathleen.
1486
01:21:24,079 --> 01:21:25,914
Everybody knows this is your baby.
1487
01:21:25,947 --> 01:21:27,682
Come on up here and give her a rip.
1488
01:21:27,716 --> 01:21:29,784
No, no, I can't really, I can't.
1489
01:21:31,419 --> 01:21:32,721
Oh, the hell with it.
1490
01:21:32,754 --> 01:21:34,155
No wait!
1491
01:21:36,925 --> 01:21:38,159
Holy headlights!
1492
01:21:39,661 --> 01:21:41,563
What?
1493
01:21:41,596 --> 01:21:44,232
Kathleen! Derek! What is the meaning of this?
1494
01:21:44,733 --> 01:21:45,800
Bye!
1495
01:21:45,834 --> 01:21:47,769
Is this somebody's idea of a joke?
1496
01:21:47,802 --> 01:21:49,571
Derek, go after her.
1497
01:21:51,439 --> 01:21:54,843
Christy, what the Sam Hill is going on here?
1498
01:21:54,876 --> 01:21:57,045
I thought it was a picture of the Blessed Virgin!
1499
01:21:57,078 --> 01:21:58,813
Right and I'm the king of Siam.
1500
01:21:58,847 --> 01:22:00,315
No really I did.
1501
01:22:00,348 --> 01:22:02,884
Oh, Mr. Murphy, we are so sorry.
1502
01:22:02,918 --> 01:22:06,187
I assure you, we are going to catch those guilty parties
1503
01:22:06,221 --> 01:22:08,256
and they will be punished.
1504
01:22:11,026 --> 01:22:12,761
For your sake I hope so.
1505
01:22:12,794 --> 01:22:15,563
But in the meantime, I certainly can't let the
1506
01:22:15,597 --> 01:22:17,966
good name of the Gelt Gouger Foundation
1507
01:22:17,999 --> 01:22:19,467
be associated with a place
1508
01:22:19,501 --> 01:22:21,803
where this kind of thing goes on.
1509
01:22:23,538 --> 01:22:26,908
Oh, now wait a second here. Let's not be rash.
1510
01:22:26,941 --> 01:22:28,910
Sorry, I've got my responsibilities.
1511
01:22:28,943 --> 01:22:31,513
Christy, pack your mukluks.
1512
01:22:31,546 --> 01:22:32,580
We're leaving.
1513
01:22:32,614 --> 01:22:33,882
Dad, please
1514
01:22:33,915 --> 01:22:36,084
Oh please, Mr. Murphy, if you could just reconsider.
1515
01:22:36,117 --> 01:22:40,021
No! No! No!
1516
01:22:42,624 --> 01:22:45,126
Come on, Margaret, we're leaving.
1517
01:22:59,140 --> 01:23:00,775
Oh!
1518
01:23:00,809 --> 01:23:04,245
This is not what it appears to be.
1519
01:23:06,181 --> 01:23:10,218
Sister, this wouldn't go beyond here, would it?
1520
01:23:12,220 --> 01:23:13,989
Hey, who did that?
1521
01:23:14,022 --> 01:23:16,658
You have nothing to worry about, sir.
1522
01:23:16,691 --> 01:23:20,061
We all have our responsibilities.
1523
01:23:20,095 --> 01:23:22,263
Now wait just one minute!
1524
01:23:22,297 --> 01:23:24,165
Oh, forget it, Dick.
1525
01:23:24,199 --> 01:23:25,734
They've seen us.
1526
01:23:27,435 --> 01:23:29,337
I'm getting some punch.
1527
01:23:30,839 --> 01:23:32,741
Margaret, wait!
1528
01:23:36,211 --> 01:23:38,046
Oh, what the hell!
1529
01:23:39,814 --> 01:23:41,349
Let's party.
1530
01:23:52,627 --> 01:23:54,229
Hit it, dudes!
1531
01:24:04,339 --> 01:24:07,642
Christy, your father has something to say to you.
1532
01:24:07,675 --> 01:24:09,277
Go ahead, Dick.
1533
01:24:09,310 --> 01:24:12,881
Right. Well under the circumstances
1534
01:24:14,149 --> 01:24:15,750
Honey, I just wanted to
1535
01:24:16,885 --> 01:24:18,553
I can't quite figure out how to say it.
1536
01:24:18,586 --> 01:24:21,356
He's sorry for jumping to conclusions about you.
1537
01:24:21,389 --> 01:24:24,159
Yeah, and well,
1538
01:24:24,192 --> 01:24:25,527
what I mean is
1539
01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:29,497
He feels maybe he's been a little too strict with you.
1540
01:24:29,531 --> 01:24:33,835
Uh-huh, because the thing is How can I put this
1541
01:24:34,869 --> 01:24:36,671
He only did it because he loves you.
1542
01:24:36,704 --> 01:24:38,273
But now that you're older
1543
01:24:38,306 --> 01:24:40,575
maybe we can learn to trust you a bit more.
1544
01:24:41,209 --> 01:24:42,844
Right. That's it.
1545
01:24:42,877 --> 01:24:45,480
Dad, I never thought I'd hear you say that.
1546
01:24:45,513 --> 01:24:47,615
Don't worry dear, you didn't.
1547
01:24:48,516 --> 01:24:50,819
Let's go, hot stuff!
1548
01:25:05,166 --> 01:25:06,768
So, I'm just getting up to speed
1549
01:25:06,801 --> 01:25:08,470
and there's this unwelcome thud on the
1550
01:25:08,503 --> 01:25:09,904
ragtop of my cruiser.
1551
01:25:09,938 --> 01:25:11,973
No! Mr. Murphy?
1552
01:25:12,006 --> 01:25:14,142
Old St. Dick himself.
1553
01:25:14,175 --> 01:25:16,411
I guess I shouldn't have parked in their driveway.
1554
01:25:16,444 --> 01:25:18,246
I guess that's why fathers don't like
1555
01:25:18,279 --> 01:25:20,915
buying expensive prom dresses for their daughters.
1556
01:25:20,949 --> 01:25:22,217
Why's that?
1557
01:25:22,250 --> 01:25:24,519
Because they know that sometime during that night,
1558
01:25:24,552 --> 01:25:26,721
it's going to end up wrapped around her ears.
1559
01:25:28,022 --> 01:25:29,324
So what happened to Christy?
1560
01:25:29,357 --> 01:25:31,292
Packing her mukluks as we speak.
1561
01:25:31,326 --> 01:25:32,794
They're sending her to Godthab.
1562
01:25:32,827 --> 01:25:34,295
Godthab, where's that?
1563
01:25:34,329 --> 01:25:35,630
Greenland.
1564
01:25:35,663 --> 01:25:38,166
What's the plan now Jerry? You gonna go up to Greenland
1565
01:25:38,199 --> 01:25:40,535
and bust in to Godthab dressed as an Eskimo?
1566
01:25:40,568 --> 01:25:43,705
That's Greenland, Zoomer, not Alaska.
1567
01:25:43,738 --> 01:25:45,340
Actually, guys, this time
1568
01:25:45,373 --> 01:25:47,675
I thought I'd dress up as a gynecologist.
1569
01:25:47,709 --> 01:25:49,444
You mean a poon doctor?
110118
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Uighur
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof