All language subtitles for Common As Muck s01e02

Last time on Communist Muck, this
happened.

I thought you'd had a word with them.
They're bloody faint of twitching.

not easy to scare.

Yippee -yi -yay! Yippee -yi -yo -hoo!

It weren't my fault.

I look after me own security.

What is it? Football pills.

And a new jaw counsellor organising. I'm
making you wet just talking to you.

Shut up!

Get on bloody fire! And all that men!

We can be shifting rubbish into the next
century.

I'll do that.

When I was little, my mum used to warn
me that if it didn't work hard, I'd end

up a dustman.

Bottom of the pile, you see. That's the
way people perceive them.

Life's non -achievers.

Which is handy, really, because if
you're not a bin man, and most people

you can comfort yourself with the
thought that you must have done

right with your life.

Hello? Yes, it is, sir. How can I help?

All over your car.

Are you sure you'll have sufficient
access?

I'm not calling you anything.

No, my point is, they're trained
operatives.

They have strict codes of practice and
behaviour.

I can assure you if anything did take
place, it was purely accidental.

They're correct, John, the great British
public.

Our lads are the lowest of the low.

George. We could still win that tender.
You've had a fortnight.

Nothing's changed.

They're not making a final decision
until the end of next week. I mean, I'll

them in again. Talk to them. They're not
worth it.

Every Tom, Dick and Harriet knows it.

They've been men.

And they've been men for a reason.

Come on in there!

Why, I don't remember what's the matter.
Sit up!

What do you mean, what's the matter?
That's a flat ball.

Of course it's a bloody flat... That's
why he can't hide out, man. That ball

could have cut my bloody window.

Bollocks.

Come on, brother.

Yeah,

that was mild of her. Was it, Bollocks?
Nil -nil. No, that's one. No, stop it.

No, no, stop that. You're going to
bloody cheat. You're coming off the

man. I've had enough, anyway.

Been feeling funny since dinner. Oh,
it's a matter of who you know, like.

I'm not that man cold as he is, but I
will.

You can bloody laugh.

Hey, I'm surprised they don't pay you a
wage, don't they? Searching for you down

there while you're here, man.

Oh, bollocks.

Men!

What?

You can't just sack them. Not without
reason.

One crew, that's all.

Gotta be foxes. They're your hardcore
agitators.

If the rest doesn't see, we mean
business. We're not firing blanks

And you've still got to catch him red
-handed. Even then, there's procedures.

Warnage! Not for everything.

Not for booze.

What? Booze.

Beer. Alcohol.

Drinking in charge of a wagon equals
instant dismissal. I take your point,

these investigations, they cause a lot
of bad feelings.

Christ, John, I'm not suggesting we drag
him in one morning and frisk him for

half bottles of whiskey.

Softly, softly.

unscheduled bin bag inventories,
impromptu wagon inspections, one or two

-round tete -a -tetes, all above board
and legal.

Then, when we sniff so much as half a
shandy, bingo.

We're not on the beer again tonight, are
we? No, no, Ian. Why, are you getting

withdrawal symptoms?

No, fine by me. I've got work to do.
College.

His wife's given him his marching
orders.

Bloody right, too.

She hardly recognises him these days.
Oh, piss off, eh? Lads!

Lads! Look, it's bloody Neville
Chamberlain. Lads! Lads! I've done it!

bloody done it!

What? There is a cut!

What, you're caught for the pool, then?
Next best bloody thing, I've won the

other one.

What other one?

Council draw.

How much?

Candlelit dinner for two at Tufts.

Topsies are shithole topsies.

Oh, Reggie's mob does the bins.

Bollocks. It's all expenses paid.

Champagne full bloody works.

All right, then. You've persuaded me.

When are you coming round?

Sod that.

It's all arranged just me and her. Who's
her?

Miss Municipal Parks and Gardens.

Oh. Pulled out all the stops, then? Hey,
this is it. This is my new start.

New start?

With Miss Municipal Parks and Gardens?
They're all the same, these model types.

Come on, let's stop off and celebrate.

What? Piss off. I'm a winner.

Oh, well, that's as good a reason as
any, isn't it?

Definitely, young 'un. Yeah, not me.

Oh, come on, you daft sod. Come and have
a drink. I don't want to. What's the

matter with you, man?

My lad's just won a night out with the
smartest tart from the parks and

Aye, peace up. Come on, Ken. I'll get
him. Listen, I'm not interested.

Carpet wants hoovering. Lawn wants
mowing. Still a bloody black's on the

Take your chuffing pick.

I'm going home.

Are you?

All right, let's hear it for Sasha.

Oh,

hey, you missed your belter there, John.
Do they have them every day?

You've purple blood, haven't you?

I've sussed you out. How you avoid
hangover?

Never stop drinking.

Keep the first one down and you're fine.

Aye, so?

Hey, lovely woman, do you know what? She
asked after you a couple of times

there, you know? Get off, Dad.

I told you, I'm moving on.

This is a... a what's it?

What? An omen. That's right, an omen.

I mean, I'm done with strip joints and
local traffic.

I've got to be fast, but I'm big a
bloody fish.

Aye, well, you sit aside till we're
late. As long as you get me a bottle of

when you're at the bar.

Am I sharp?

Is Bernard one at home? No, he never
touches it.

Here, Bernard. Aye, go up, eh? Get
pissed off.

Only time he ever had a drink, he slung
this dustbin straight through this

bloke's front window. Dad, you threw the
bloody bin?

Well, he would have done. Man, he
couldn't stand up.

Get him a lemonade.

He likes it with a straw.

Son, you'll be saving up some money,
lad, for when you're going back to the,

the whatchamacallit, you know, the
college. Plenty of time yet. Put some

next week. Next week?

You've been spending too many nights out
with Ken, lad.

Hey, you should sit to the stage and
come with me.

Yeah?

Yeah, I will.

I didn't know you were back.

Yeah, a week.

I never called. I just thought I'd
better get myself straight first.

I've got a job interview.

You stopped over there then, has he,
Steve?

Well, I thought I fell apart at the
seams.

Oh, sod him, eh?

Plenty more efficiency.

And no mistakes this time. I've got it
worked out. I'm going to find someone

decent.

Best of luck.

I nearly didn't call. You know, I
thought curtains were drawn.

Half days.

I thought you and Denise had... I need
to borrow

some of her. Is she... No, she's at
work.

I know I should have called her as soon
as I got back, but you know what it's

like. You need to be ready for folk.

They're always waiting, aren't they?

I mean, I don't mean you and Denise.

I just mean some of them. They're just
waiting to wag their fingers, aren't

they, and start shouting, Oh, I told you
so!

I just wanted to test the water before I
jumped in.

You did right.

What time's she finish?

I don't know today.

Help yourself.

You know where everything is.

Well, you don't think she'd mind?

Thing is, I can't get her again till
after interview.

Go ahead.

Yeah, well, it's only a bag.

I'll drop it back tomorrow evening.

No trouble.

Oh, shit.

Take it all.

Save me dumping it.

Oh, Ken, I didn't... Oh, go on.

I'm serious.

It's no bloody good here. Take the
bleeding lot.

I'll come back later.

Don't be bloody stupid.

It's quality company.

Here, have it. Every last sodding button
and thread. Get some bleeding use out

of it.

Christ, Ken, what have you done?

What have I done?

Where have I been slipping my wandering
dick, is that what you think?

I'm bloody old -fashioned me, Marie.

I saved my shagging for in here, the
marital bed.

That's what they call it, innit?

You want to know what's gone on you, ask
your best bloody friend.

Here, have it.

Go on.

Get it out of my bleeding sight.

Take that bloody thing off or you'll
frighten me to death, man, every time I

turn round.

I shall design this for night -time
manoeuvres. You're off the trout, not

terrorists.

Ray, you steer down here. I'll get off
to the traps.

I'll meet you back here in half an hour.

Dad. What? What about the thermos?

What about it? We've only got one. The
other one's knackered. Well, you'll have

to go without.

Bollocks, I'm standing in that river.
I'll freeze my balls off. You're just a

nipper. You'll not feel the cold.

Dad.

What? Get Neville Rabbit.

What for?

Well, I don't reckon he's planning on
slipping it in a nudge and feeding it

twice a day. I mean, he had two last
week.

Well, I don't know. I'm just a messenger
boy.

Right.

OK, Percy, take one bit of action.

When you want it so Relax, relax, relax
Relax, relax, relax Relax, relax, relax

Relax, relax, relax

Something fine with me.

You all right, mate?

Aye, just a bit asthma.

You don't want to watch it these cold
mornings.

Don't know what you'll catch.

Wait a minute, Percy.

Fine, is it? I'm not getting involved in
your politics.

Why should I?

I mean, what can I do?

Eh? Last out, Nev. It's not good.

Well, look, I am here, aren't I?

It's not me you should be talking to,
then, is it? Senior man, I thought you'd

feel responsible.

Well, I do not, do I?

Now, John O 'Hare said that his dad had
a good head start and should have been

home hours ago. Lads, we're supposed to
be putting our socks on.

Bloody Judgment Day is just round the
corner.

Hockley, where have you been? Aye,
sorry. Ran to a very botherly.

There you are.

Oh, cheers.

There you are, Dev. Oh, yes.

Bloody great bugger that is, isn't he?

They would start complaining I nearly
got pulled in, touching that. John O

What does he know? He was up late, he'd
drunk a yard of Ben Johnson's pig, you

know. I had to hide in that ditch till I
called them dogs up. What have I got to

say before you'll believe me?

Jury's out.

Hey, no crew works out of the north.
Fine.

There's no point in me getting on to
you.

You're not going to change, are you?

Fair enough.

When time comes, you'll take your chance
with all the other outfits up for

refuse job.

But don't drop yourself so deep in the
shit. You'll never get out again. What

are you talking about? Tea and coffee.

All right.

While you're at work. I didn't drink
coffee. No holy water.

No funny juice.

Oh, no, no, no. Not that old crack
again. It's up to you.

He wants blood.

I'm saying no more. You know, John, it
surprises me that the DOG gives you a

wage. You're that good to us.

What are

you

doing

here? I can't see you anymore.

I don't want to see you anymore.

I've told my wife.

She goes to church, you know.

I couldn't... It's wrong what we did.

She's had me children.

Gosh, you'd never have... I don't know
what came over me. Why are you here?

Listen, I'm not blaming you. You're
stuffing crap.

Just don't come round, that's all. It
weren't anything. It just happened.

And I've got a family.

I love them.

I realise that.

You coward.

You miserable, rotten coward. Are you a
man or what? Are you? What are you?

Go on, sod off. You make me feel dirty.

Oh, you reckon you can feel guilty and
just wash your hands of it?

You live with it.

Oh, I'll not be around. Don't worry
about that. But you did it, remember?

I went alone in that room, you know. You
chased me.

You live with what you've done.

Denise. Oh, you no balls.

I'd not piss on you if you was on fire.

You bloody love it.

This is so bad, isn't it? I want to put
some butter on that.

You want to mind your own business.

You should have stopped fighting at your
age. It's kind of maturity.

Bollocks. Imagine what it does to your
brain if your outside looks like that.

You'll not change him, you know.

Nobody changes deep down inside, no
matter how old you get.

Now, if you're a fighter, that's what
you are.

A fighter, cradle to grave, never stops.

You just take more beatings.

And they're right, Ken.

Trapping, shitting, mocking.

Yeah. Piss off, you simple twat.

Are you going to tell me what's going
on? Get out of my way.

Come on.

What happened?

Nothing's happened. I'm working. Now
piss off.

Don't talk to me like that.

There's a good lad.

It's bloody ridiculous.

He hasn't hijacked it, man. Just
borrowed it, that's all. Oh, so that's

right, is it, Dad?

So next time I want a lift down the pub,
I should have a word to her. All right

for borrowing the wagon, Dad? It's still
work, man. He's just gone off to the

tip a bit early, that's all.

Said he needed ten minutes with Ken.

Bad time or something. It's always a bad
time with Ken.

He was born rubbed up the wrong way. The
only difference is he normally gets the

boot in first.

I don't know. Look.

I can't give her that. I want something
decent, you soft sod.

Is this you?

You're shag -nasty, you.

I want something good, impressive. I've
told you, man, get your hand in your

pocket. Yeah, Dad, and I've told you. I
can't afford what she's used to,

necklaces and that.

You've got to remember who these women
knock around with. You've got to get

something a bit different.

No, that's not common.

That's easy if you've got the dosh. I've
got to get something unusual.

Something that says something about me.

Tie a ribbon round your nub.

You alright?

I must have pulled something.

Oh, yeah, boy.

I won't.

There's nothing wrong.

Billy Bedwood.

He takes his kid up the wreck every
time.

I see him when I'm playing footy. You
know, I nod to him.

Bloody hell, he's thrown the sodding
ball back when it's got kicked out.

You know, you want to call her. Where is
she?

Mams.

That's the usual way, isn't it?

They crap all over you, then get a bit
jumpy about how the old boy's going to

take it.

Run off scared to their mams.

You know, you shouldn't leave it too
long.

Leave what?

I mean, you... You don't know really
what went on, do you, Ken?

It might have been him more than her,
you see. I mean, it might have been that

she were drunk.

We were half past four in the afternoon
then.

Yeah, but I mean, you don't know really
what happened, Ken, do you?

That's what I'm saying.

So I think, you know, you ought to have
a...

I talk with you, just in case you change
your mind after, and then find it's too

late. Bloody hell, Nev, is there
something wrong with you?

Me missus has started seeing another
bloke.

I'm mother sodding Theresa in all this.
I'm whiter than white.

I'm buggered if I'm going capping on to
her saying, oh, here, love, do you think

we should have a chat about this?

If she could have kept her sodding legs
shut, there'd be bugger all to chat

about. Just make sure.

Look, I'm bloody sure, Jesus Christ,
Nev, what are you taking her side for,

anyway? I'm not taking her side, Ken,
I'm not taking her side. I'm older than

you. You know, I mean...

I know how these things sometimes don't
turn out.

That's all. I mean... I mean, you don't
know what it's like to be without

someone and wishing all the time that
they were there.

Oh, leave us alone, will you? Putting
your oar in, what the bloody hell do you

know?

You've never made any mistakes, no?

Oh, no, of course, I was forgetting.

You were bloke with perfect marriage,
weren't you, you and your Eileen?

Well, that's not how I always remember
it.

You're so bloody tough, aren't you?

Well, you're not. You're a bloody fool.

You have not got a clue how much upset
and sheer bloody pain is lying in

wait for you just around the corner. Oh,
leave it out, will you?

The shit keeps coming down.

And it's piling up.

And there's nothing you can do about it.

But you think you know it all, don't
you? You know it.

You know how rough it's going to get.

How dirty.

Lads, you haven't even scratched the
surface.

And when you do, you'll wish you did it
all different.

Because when you really need to fight,
you find you won't be able to. Because

you're all punched out in stupid battles
of your own bloody making.

All right, Bernard.

Hey, Mr Parry. Hey, Bernard.

Getting on well this morning, Bernard.

Catch up?

Going like a steam train.

Instead of a muzzle and a striped vest,
me.

Must be thirsty.

Oh, all right.

Had a drink.

That right?

Oh, by precinct.

Lovely. Nice glass of beer.

Lemonade. I'm sad he doesn't get near
it.

Had lemonade today.

It's Thursday.

Beer makes me go whappy.

The other lads like a drink, though,
don't they, Bernard?

Get bevved up.

This isn't right, George. He gets a bit
confused, don't you, Bernard?

Where do they get bevved up?

You'd never get a dismissal to stand on
his safe zone.

Where do they get bevved up, Bernard?

At night.

No, during the day. Where do they get
bevved up during the day?

At night. No, I want to know where the
lads have a drink during the day.

Don't drink during the day, cos you get
sacked.

And all the bastards at headquarters
will be pissing themselves, cos they

like us.

And all they want to do is shit at us,
so we don't change during the day.

And I'm a good lad, and I stick to my
story no matter what.

I've got to go. I'm late.

Check the post.

Sniff them out.

£5 .99?

Trust me, women love all that.

I can't believe they've done it.

Look, read her a couple of pounds before
you give it to her.

Get her in the mood. In the mood!

He'd had to put her into abortion.

Crap, man, before she let him anywhere
near her. I promise.

Fever.

He'll be held back, won't he?

Take a seat, please. He won't be long.

Miss O'Donnell, could you come through,
please?

Mr O'Donnell.

Thank you for coming in.

My pleasure.

My name is Stanley Arnold.

This is Guy Simmons.

We've worked together on the council.

I'm afraid the third member of the team
is running a little late, but if you've

no objection, we'd like to make a start.

Fire away.

I know how busy you are.

I saw your picture in the paper the
other week at the twinning ceremony.

You never stop.

Must be what keeps you looking so young.

Sorry, sorry.

George Ward.

The brains behind all of this.

Sorry, I hate interrupting.

George, DOG, do you want to explain?

Yes, yes.

The council has agreed to support a
promotional campaign highlighting the

facilities that DOG provide.

Parks and gardens... Oh, I'm all for
that.

I've always thought we take our
amenities for granted.

I mean, I've travelled extensively, and
I can tell you that what they've got on

offer abroad is nothing compared to what
we have here.

Yet you should hear the song and dance
they make about it over there.

What would you like to be done?

Well,

I'm not talking specifics.

I mean, Mr Ward here, he's the brains,
like you said.

All I'm saying is, if you've got it,
flaunt it.

You've got to be crazy.

You'll only make it worse running away
with your tail bitten, you know. I'm not

running away. I'm going, Mum.

Oh, you want to put yourself together.
Oh, don't say that. You always say that.

What about him? Now, what's he going to
do? I don't know.

Oh, you know, daughter of mine.

No, I'm bloody not.

I'm sick to death of putting up. I'm
sick of pulling myself together.

I hate it round here.

Oh, Denise.

I'm not like you.

You love it.

Living all on your own?

Ever since he pissed off, you've loved
it.

You've found your role in life.

Getting by.

Oh, the bloody meanness and the aggro
and the boredom.

You're in your bloody element.

Well, I'm not going to let myself be
treated like dirt, then pat myself on

back just because I never moaned. I'm
worth a little bit more than that.

You see, that's the other thing about
parks and gardens.

It's blankets and deaf ones and that.

I mean, they get a lot of use out of
them.

They can sit there and sniff flowers.

Now, you can't put a price on that, can
you?

You want to let people know what good
value they're getting.

Very good.

Oh, I'm sure you'd let them know exactly
what was on offer, Marie.

I'm sorry to be so negative, but I
wonder if Marie realised...

What qualities Miss Municipal the most
needs to display?

I think she's doing very well.

What do you mean? Well, it's obvious
that Maria's thought long and hard about

this interview, and she's expressed some
strong opinions.

But does she realise that there is a
physical element to this work as well?

and teeth, you mean?

Well, I was taking it for granted, Mr
Simmons.

Well, we're none of us kids, are we?

Nice of you to be concerned, though.

It doesn't worry me.

Though I would prefer a one -piece to a
bikini.

Now, I've got some other people I have
to see.

You've got my number.

Well, I like swimming, cooking and
upsetting wankers.

All for a drop of vintage that's been
cooled along age in the deep delver

All for a beaker full of the warm south,
full of the true, the blissful, the

what?

The hypocrite.

With beaded bubbles winking at the brim
and purple stained mouth that I might

drink and leave the world unseen.

You like your drink, like, didn't you?

You reckon that'll get a randy? I want
to put some of that powdered rhino horn

in a drink. You're reading the wrong
poem, here. Get off, you'll get it

La belle dame sans merci.

It's at the back.

Bloody hell, give him a chance. He can
hardly speak English.

Bloody ridiculous.

Women, you get your son all worked up,
you lay your son wide open. Is it any

wonder they take advantage?

Stop that thing!

Will you wait here, Flynn?

Take that.

What do you want?

I want to talk to you.

Five minutes.

I swear something's died in there.

It smells, doesn't it? It's not gross,
sir.

You wait till it's all rotten. Bet
you'll make its own way to the bin. Save

the trouble.

It's a rat! It's a rat! It's a rat!

It's a rat!

It's a rat! It's a rat!

It's a rat!

That rat down at the brewery. He never
played darts again.

That was a Jack Russell man. Have a
bloody long tail.

Ready?

No.

What are you doing?

I always get me rat.

Coffee.

Are you still seeing him?

Don't start.

You've got a nerve.

You take up with another bloke, then you
get funny when I ask about him. I'm not

seeing him. I look like his arse
flashing up and down in our bedroom.

Is that all you're bothered about?

The heck?

What do you think?

You don't worry why it happened.

You think it's my fault? No.

I'm not saying that.

But it happened, didn't it?

It did happen.

What do you want, a bloody certificate?

I'm going, Ken.

What?

I want you to know why.

Me mam and that, your mate, they don't
want you to listen to them.

Why?

It weren't because of you.

Well, that's all right, then. Listen to
me.

It were one -off.

It weren't planned or out because of how
you'd been.

He saw you Tuesday night. Christ, Nev.

He said he saw you in pub.

You were there, weren't you?

Philip Edwards, that's why Nev said.

He were there. I weren't with him. Liar.

One -off.

You're lying.

How long's it been going on? Ken. You
had him that night, didn't you? What you

couldn't do without. You had to have him
evenings as well as day shifts. He

weren't with me. He was just there.

Oh, bollocks. Admit it. You had him,
didn't you? That night? No. Up against

wall? No.

Bloody knee trembler. No, no, no.

What do you want me to say? Yeah, of
course I did. Up against toilet wall and

had a massive cock and he was better
than you and it was bloody wonderful.

Is that what you want, is it?

I came to tell you I want you to know
the truth.

I don't care.

It matters, Ken.

I never meant to.

I never planned it.

He was there that night at the pub.

It kept going on. He wanted me. He
wouldn't shut up.

But I'd never... You don't know, Ken.

You get on with your life, with the
lads.

You just don't know.

He kept going on at me.

He said he was going crazy. I was
driving him mad.

I'm sorry, Ken.

Don't go.

Please.

I don't care, everyone. You know, you do
things you don't think.

No.

It's here.

I'm going mad.

I'll make it better.

I promise I will. There's loads of
things.

I'll get out with you more, we'll spend
more time at weekends.

It's me, you're right, I don't think
sometimes, but I can make it better, I

promise.

But you mustn't give up.

It's a matter of putting the effort in,
that's all.

There's millions of things.

It's not that easy, Ken.

All the things that we said that we'd do
and we never did.

Kids and that.

What? Well, family.

We talked about it, didn't we, but...
But we did know. Well, we should.

That's what's wrong.

You've got time on your hands.

You're ready for kids.

Ken, you're just talking.

You can't go, Denise.

I don't care what you've done.

I love you.

Do you understand?

I'd do anything for you.

I love you.

I can't manage without you.

It's a rat!

Do we call people who make things up?

Look there.

Hello.

Have any of you seen a large gerbil?

Where's it gone?

Look there.

Leave it.

Hang on.

You what?

Well, couldn't drag you off the
sentiment and go, John is right, come

crack on.

You're going to kick it.

Is it serious? Well, the offence of
driving vermin into a department store

not carrying the can.

Well, you can't just leave it.

Could have just wandered in off the
street, couldn't it?

Oh, aye.

What's it doing then?

Checking up on special offers?

I'll tell you something for nothing. I
am not going in there.

What then?

Hey, what's up with you lot? You look
guilty as hell.

Right in picking mix.

Right, look, we need to have a bit of a
chat.

Just get yourselves in the boozer.

I'll go and hide the wagon.

King said there no railway.

Railway. Look over now. It'll nip out
when no one's looking. They're not daft

rats.

They are not daft rats.

Oh, dear, oh, dear.

David Attenborough must be shitting
himself with you standing in the wings

all that wildlife information at your
fingertips.

Hey, what are you having, young 'un?

I'm fine, thanks.

Oh, come on, I know it's not against
your bloody religion. I've seen you the

past few nights.

Have some more top shelf.

I'll have a half. Another pint, Les.

Any more for any more.

Come on, get it while I'm flush.

So they've never popped in here at all.

Not even for a quick half.

No, not for donkey's years.

Not sure I'd have them in nowadays, all
grimy and smelly.

Started doing food.

Thing is, we need to be able to contact
them in case they have to go back for

missed bins.

Save them time going back the next day.

Sorry, I can't help you.

I'll tell you where you might try.

What's the name of the pub by the mill?

Kingfisher. Kingfisher, that's it.

I've definitely seen them.

In the chip shop opposite the
Kingfisher.

Might be worth popping round there.

I'll tell the lads you asked after them.

Howdy. Well, maybe they go in after
they've finished work.

Oh, please.

By the bloody Mafia, half the town's in
league with them.

They're out there somewhere.

Some of the cleverest animals around,
rats are.

Bollocks. Oh, they all look after one
another. She has things on. Well, it's

probably got a trolley by now, putting
it around it. Getting a few things for

its mate.

It were on telly. Oh, it's got to be
true, hasn't it? Hey, you, Mr Perry.

Bugger it.

Stop up.

Yeah, hang on. What about me dad?

Bernard, go find Foxy where he's at
wagging. Make sure he goes straight to

Chippy. All right. I'm a good dad, I am.

Excuse me, landlord.

Drink plenty of that vinegar and all.
Right.

Here you are.

All right, lads?

Got the wages?

Hello, John.

Well, you're early, aren't you? I mean,
even on Wages Day, you're not usually

here for a couple of hours. Oh, we'd
shake things up a bit, make a change.

Oh, what a good idea, Mr Ward.

But, you know, you could have caught us
doing something really naughty.

Oh, sorry, Mr Ward.

That vinegar's off a barren, isn't it?

We've a week before council decide
whether you lads keep shifting their

Daff to get into any trouble that might
prejudice their decision.

As a matter of fact, I was thinking of
taking redundancy, if it's offered.

After all, this is a crap job, Mr Ward.

You miserable rotten buggers! It's
eaten!

Half a lemon sherbets.

I'll have your balls.

What's happening?

It's not how it seems, Mr Ward. What the
bloody hell's going on? Juno!

Juno!

It's your dad.

What? Badly.

He's badly.

I took him off in an ambulance.

Oh, no.

Don't worry. I'll run you round.

See me back here.

Right.

Well, you'll have to drive the rest of
the day. I presume you know where the

wagon is. Well, hang on. What about
Foxy?

I'm not stopping his leg going. You've
got work to do. We want to know how he

is. Make a phone call when you've a
minute.

Don't push it.

I'm sorry.

These things happen.

What can I say?

How is he?

Still doing tests.

I thought I'd drop him, make sure.

That's all.

You told your mum?

She's coming over now.

Terrible for her.

You don't think, do you?

You're not down to work next week, are
you?

I'll see if I can get you in.

For a week.

I'll have to get a loan for them.

Nothing, eh?

Student. I've got to do it. Dad and
everything.

I know.

That's what I was thinking.

I need the money.

I won't stay out.

You're a good worker.

Mr Parry says so.

Shame we have to keep you on this on
-off contract.

Can't be helped, I suppose.

Still, all the same.

Can I be honest with you?

I'd seen that you were permanent than
some of the lads you work with.

Apart from everything else, you need the
money more.

Even before today.

Young, aren't you? Start now. You want
to get married eventually, have kids.

And you've got the right attitude.

Nev and Ken, they've had a fair crack.

And they rock the boat.

Make it harder and harder for me to tell
Campbell we're doing a good job.

What do you say, Mr. Wall?

The way things are going, we're going to
lose the refuse tender.

You're all going to be out of work.

It's a bad time as far as you're
concerned. I don't want to see it.

So I reckon if I could ease a couple
out, make space for you, I could pull it

round, make sure we keep the tender and
you get a full -time job when you need

it most.

I know drinking goes on.

It's a fucking offence.

I just had some idea of where.

No -one would know.

How could they?

Needed time and a place.

Then Mr Parry and I would happen to
drive by.

We could arrange it so that you'd nip to
the shop, something like that.

You'd best go now.

The date's for you.

You're all shriveled up inside.

What?

I'm 17 and I'm as fit as a fiddle.

If you don't go now, I'm going to whip
you so hard they're not going to be able

to stitch your head back on.

Are you... Go on, go.

Do you not know when you'll be?

Hello, Dolce.

Hello.

How is he?

He's stable.

Next few hours, you know.

Might not even be that.

He's done set.

You don't mind us coming, do you? Don't
be daft.

Expecting you. We couldn't sit at home
worrying.

They were beginning to fret.

Don't like hospitals.

Let's go home.

Now you wanted to come, sit down.

Oh, er... Dolce, would you care to sit
in my chair?

I can get myself another.

Very well, let your mother get through.

That's very kind of you, ma 'am. Thank
you.

As I'm off, would you like anything? A
cup of coffee, anything?

No, no, thanks.

Val?

No, Tom. Just get us a Coke.

Bet you've not had chance for out yet.
Come straight from work?

Don't leave him, in case he has another
attack.

Er, well, er... Want some money?

I've got some change.

Oh, it's all right. I'm not bothered.

Oh, fine.

Jesus! What? What's happening?

He hasn't gone cold, has he? I'll get a
nurse. Jono, it's all right.

I'm sorry.

Jono. Yeah?

Quick word.

Outside.

God, yeah!

Jono, what are you trying to do?

Frighten her to death?

I didn't know what she was doing. And
don't use that word. She is brutally

upset, couldn't you see that? It's all
right.

What's the matter with you? You've got
no tact.

Leave it.

He's a sick man, Jono.

Yeah, you reckon I don't know that, eh?

You reckon I haven't sussed that out for
myself?

Sorry, Nev.

I know I'm not behaving right, but I
haven't done this before. No, it's all

right, it's all right.

What about with me leaving him in that
ditch when we were after the rabbits?

Come on, don't be soft.

Oh, you don't know, do you? I don't know
what I might have done.

All right.

Bloody hellfire!

You'll do something!

Nurse! Hey, man, I'm all right, man. I'm
champion, man. It's just this thing

going bleep, bleep, bleep. All you
expect me to get is kept, like.

What are you doing?

I'm getting up.

You can't!

I mean, you're bloody dying.

There's nothing wrong with this, man.

You'll make yourself badly.

Look, man, I'm just dying for a task.

You're not in here, you're not. Can't
you read?

Just drag you in here and stick all
these needles in you.

They'll plug you into this national
grid.

I mean, it's no wonder you fancy your
little pump on the old nerve steadier.

I tell you what, next time I'm done
private.

Who is it?

I put kettle on.

Marie, you're back.

So are you. You are.

Come in. Is everything all right?
Because I saw Ken in here. No, it's all

We sorted.

Silly cow.

There you are. Oh, any good? What do you
think?

I'm only missing municipal bloody pikes
and guys. Oh, you are.

I got it. The interview I were up for.
No. They're lining up the social world

already. Hey.

I'm on my way.

Your bloody thumb.

Fiona, promise?

I might be.

Don't grin like that at Gatsby.

You remember to get some of them profile
actuaries.

You what?

Nothing a wire brush and penicillin
wouldn't shift in my day. No, you get

of them profile actuaries.

Better safe than sorry. Yeah, all right.
Thanks.

Hey, Jono, don't try getting them at
supermarket.

Some rotten boogers let a rat loose and
council have closed it down.