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Eh!
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Cup of coffee, please. Yeah,
3
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nothing like a good cup of coffee in the
middle of the afternoon.
4
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Not the middle, exactly.
5
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More 12 -ish, huh?
6
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1224, to be exact.
7
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Yay!
8
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What you got there, Ray? A new watch?
9
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You noticed, huh?
10
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Yep, it's new, all right.
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That must have set you back a little.
12
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Yeah, I guess it's extravagant, but
yesterday my tax refund came, and I
13
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it might be my last for the next 48
years, so I figured, what the hell, why
14
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treat yourself, huh? Yeah, and it'll
give you something to pawn after the tax
15
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hikes.
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Let me take a closer look at that, Ray.
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Hi, Ray.
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Oh, what have we here? A new watch.
19
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Yeah, I've had my eye on this beauty for
months now.
20
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Never thought I'd own it, though.
21
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What do you think? I think it's very
nice.
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The styling is so delicate.
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Is this what men are wearing these days?
24
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What are you saying?
25
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It's small?
26
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It's not small. It's elegant.
27
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Here, I'll show you. Wally knows
fashion.
28
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Hey, Wally, take a look at my new watch.
29
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Oh, wow.
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That's gorgeous, Ray. Really elegant.
31
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Are men wearing little watches now?
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It's not that little. Oh, yes, it is.
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You want to know what I think? I think
you got just enough of a girl's watch.
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Get out of here.
35
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This is no girl's watch.
36
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It's expensive.
37
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Expensive watches look like them.
38
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Oh, yeah? Then why is the band so
skinny, huh?
39
00:02:03,780 --> 00:02:06,420
And look, look, you got it in the first
hole tight as a drum.
40
00:02:06,620 --> 00:02:08,199
Your fingers are turning blue, man.
41
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:12,400
I don't know what you're talking about.
Yeah. I bought a man's watch. I know a
42
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:13,940
man's watch when I see one. Mm -hmm.
43
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:15,780
Good afternoon, everybody.
44
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Okay, here we go.
45
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Hey, Mary Margaret, take a look at my
new watch.
46
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Oh, Ray.
47
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Granny Litvak finally passed away. I'm
sorry.
48
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That's it. It's going back.
49
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Oh, de -stress yourself, Ray. It's a
beautiful day.
50
00:02:33,260 --> 00:02:34,340
You're smiling, Meg.
51
00:02:34,640 --> 00:02:35,660
You on painkillers?
52
00:02:36,780 --> 00:02:38,200
No, bartender Abe.
53
00:02:38,740 --> 00:02:41,700
I'm just a happy all -American girl. You
know why?
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It's opening day. Oh, yeah, right,
right.
55
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Yup. Every year, Jack and I kick off the
baseball season by going up to the
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house that Ruth built. We sit in the
cheap seats, yell at the umps, and taunt
57
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the other team's bullpen about why Slim
Fast hasn't worked for them.
58
00:02:55,880 --> 00:02:56,619
I love baseball.
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00:02:56,620 --> 00:03:00,020
I was a Little League mom for years. I
know all about the game. For instance,
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00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,220
between innings, the players love
sunflower seeds and orange slices.
61
00:03:03,580 --> 00:03:06,700
And if they win, they get so excited
because they're taken to the Dairy Queen
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00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:10,000
where each one gets a small cone and a
dilly bar. That's why they run off the
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00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,380
field so fast at the end of the game.
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You don't actually think Major Leaguers
are running to the Dairy Queen, do you?
65
00:03:15,380 --> 00:03:18,960
No, of course not. They're headed to a
hotel for staking prostitutes, but it's
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the same principle.
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00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:25,620
You know what the best part is?
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I'll get to spend an entire afternoon
with Jack. The guy's my best friend, and
69
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:30,359
never see him anymore.
70
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:31,940
Not since Princess Wally got here.
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00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:34,240
Hello, sports fans.
72
00:03:34,620 --> 00:03:36,720
Boy, baseball fever's really in the air.
73
00:03:36,940 --> 00:03:39,520
Even the thugs have switched over from
guns to bats.
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00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:44,580
Oh, you ready to go, Meg? I got my
ticket, 50 bucks, and my mouth's all set
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00:03:44,580 --> 00:03:47,920
the perfect ballpark, Frank. Cooked
exactly the way it should be, under a
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00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:48,920
bulb. All right.
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00:03:49,340 --> 00:03:50,259
Bye, guys.
78
00:03:50,260 --> 00:03:52,080
I'll be ready to go in a minute. Okay.
79
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:58,220
What? Nadine, I'm going to the game now.
And don't name the lobsters tonight.
80
00:03:58,300 --> 00:03:59,420
You get too attached.
81
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:05,400
Okay, what are we waiting for? We've got
a baseball game to go to. Excuse me.
82
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:06,520
What's going on here?
83
00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:07,840
She's going?
84
00:04:08,220 --> 00:04:11,280
It's supposed to be just the two of us.
That's the tradition.
85
00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,620
Yeah, well, I invited Wally to join us.
86
00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:16,700
And you want to go? Yeah, I want to go.
87
00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:19,839
Well, like a lot? Just average or not
that much?
88
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:22,040
Is there a problem here?
89
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:25,200
Listen, I just thought it would be nice
if the two most important women in my
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life, you know, spent a little time
together.
91
00:04:27,220 --> 00:04:28,540
It's not like I'm ripping your heart
out, Meg.
92
00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:30,000
Well, I mean, is that an option?
93
00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:32,060
I mean, look at her with that mitt.
94
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,239
It's Ray's.
95
00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,700
He gave it to me for catching fly balls.
96
00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:38,240
Ray.
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00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:39,940
Oh, man, Ray.
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00:04:40,340 --> 00:04:43,280
No self -respecting man takes a mitt to
a ball game.
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00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:46,420
Must everything be a test of my manhood?
100
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,920
You know, Meg, you've been trying to
come in between me and Wally since the
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00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:55,220
beginning. Now, it's not going to work.
When are you going to realize that we
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00:04:55,220 --> 00:04:56,480
are for real? Oh, please.
103
00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:59,480
Ten to one, you two will break up before
they start hiding Al Gore.
104
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:05,880
How could you do it, Jack? How could you
invite Wally to our opening day?
105
00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:09,200
All I want is for you two to be friends.
Is that too much to ask? Yes.
106
00:05:23,270 --> 00:05:26,030
Is it customary for people to breed at
baseball games?
107
00:05:26,710 --> 00:05:28,970
Are you sure we can't get better seats?
108
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:32,150
We can get better seats, but, you know,
we like sitting here. You know, the
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cheap seats with the real fans. Yeah,
every time I come, I'm locked in a press
110
00:05:35,190 --> 00:05:37,430
box. I never get to experience the game
with the civilians.
111
00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:39,670
Except once a year, with Jack.
112
00:05:40,170 --> 00:05:43,270
It's our tradition that we've been
observing for eight years.
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Jack and I. All right, fine, I can live
with that. No problem.
114
00:05:48,470 --> 00:05:49,990
Come on, you lazy bums!
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Five million a year and you can't stop.
Why can't I?
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00:05:53,510 --> 00:05:57,450
My mother can move faster than you, you
bunch of Barbie dolls!
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00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:04,530
This is just a question, but why do all
the men in our section have their
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00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:06,010
stomachs hanging over their belts?
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00:06:06,290 --> 00:06:07,290
It's a look.
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00:06:08,090 --> 00:06:11,110
Okay, Jack, here we go. Here comes the
first pitch of the season.
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Steer right!
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00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,020
The hat. What?
123
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:24,780
Wally, honey, look,
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00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:29,600
that hat, let me see. You got it all
wrong. My head's filling the hollow
125
00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:30,900
What else is there to know?
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00:06:31,660 --> 00:06:35,380
Wally, honey, this is not a baseball
cap. You know, when the bill is bigger
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00:06:35,380 --> 00:06:39,480
the part that fits over your head,
you've crossed the line from baseball
128
00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:41,040
some sort of yachting thing.
129
00:06:42,420 --> 00:06:44,840
Look around. This is not exactly a
nautical group.
130
00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:47,240
Some of these people haven't seen water
in months.
131
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:49,240
I don't care. I'm wearing...
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00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:57,920
Molly, honey, I don't think you have to
worry about your mitt.
133
00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,740
I've been going to baseball games ever
since all the owners were racist bigots,
134
00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:02,960
and I've never caught a foul ball.
135
00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:10,940
Three bags up here.
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00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:13,680
That kid looks familiar.
137
00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:16,460
Hey! Hey!
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00:07:16,780 --> 00:07:18,800
Watch it, pal! What are you doing?
139
00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:23,040
What am I doing? That kid threw those
peanuts right at me. He aimed at me.
140
00:07:23,180 --> 00:07:25,180
That's what he's supposed to do. It's
part of the...
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00:07:25,590 --> 00:07:29,770
fear. Well, somebody should have told me
that. Well, now you know.
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00:07:30,010 --> 00:07:31,070
Now I know.
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00:07:31,530 --> 00:07:35,530
Hey, that was deliberate. Did you see
that? That was deliberate. No, it
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00:07:35,530 --> 00:07:37,610
Wally. Yeah, it was. That'll be two
bucks.
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00:07:39,890 --> 00:07:43,350
Wait a minute. Aren't you the kid that
delivered our deli food last week? Yeah,
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00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:46,450
that can't be. Mr. Cat's coming with his
wife. But he wasn't exactly twisting
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00:07:46,450 --> 00:07:47,450
around.
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00:07:49,210 --> 00:07:51,150
Oh, hey, two bags of peanuts down here.
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00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:54,790
Show off, little runt.
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00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,640
The kid's money for the peanut guy.
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00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:01,360
Here.
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00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:04,180
Guy, we got a problem, man. We're a
little short. It's $1 .75.
153
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:05,440
I need two bucks.
154
00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,220
Excuse me, little boy. You're short 25
cents.
155
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:12,360
What are you talking about? I passed
down eight quarters.
156
00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:13,820
Count it again.
157
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,280
Count it again.
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00:08:15,380 --> 00:08:17,960
I did. You're short. What are you trying
to do, lady? Pinch the kid's coin?
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00:08:18,740 --> 00:08:23,400
Oh, this is insane. You know what you
are? You're a menace to society. Yeah,
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00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:24,520
like you aren't. All right, look.
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00:08:24,780 --> 00:08:27,040
I have a quarter. Forget it.
162
00:08:27,690 --> 00:08:31,030
Obviously trying to rip us off for 25
cents. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm doing.
163
00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:33,250
Then I can buy that nice villa in France
I've had my eye on.
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00:08:33,850 --> 00:08:34,789
Sit down.
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00:08:34,789 --> 00:08:36,049
I am missing the game.
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00:08:36,370 --> 00:08:37,409
Here is your quarter.
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00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:38,630
Now take a hike.
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00:08:39,270 --> 00:08:40,309
Ah, must I go?
169
00:08:40,950 --> 00:08:43,690
All right, I just want to tell you, it's
been sheer heaven seeing a boat of
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00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:44,690
yours again.
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00:08:45,450 --> 00:08:46,910
Peanuts in the shell. Go to hell.
172
00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:51,550
Okay, two up, two down. Let's get one
more and we...
173
00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:11,800
just spilled a beer on my back. Oh, it
seeped me through.
174
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:15,540
I really feel very sorry about that
lady.
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00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,800
$3 .50 down the drain.
176
00:09:20,580 --> 00:09:26,120
Holly, take my jacket. I'll go and try
and get this drawn off or something.
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00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,780
wait. Aren't you that guy, the columnist
Jack Stein?
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00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:33,540
Yeah, that's me. Baseball fans are the
greatest. This is my wife.
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00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,840
She hates your guts.
180
00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:45,059
What's your name?
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00:09:45,060 --> 00:09:47,800
Marion. To Fat Marion.
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00:09:49,220 --> 00:09:50,280
Get a life.
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00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:51,900
Jack Stein.
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00:09:52,680 --> 00:09:54,620
Thank you very much, Jack.
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00:10:52,430 --> 00:10:54,910
That guy's up because he's a designated
hitter. No, not that.
186
00:10:55,830 --> 00:10:57,250
Meg, why don't you like me?
187
00:10:58,710 --> 00:10:59,710
Oh, man.
188
00:11:00,330 --> 00:11:01,490
Can I sit with you?
189
00:11:02,630 --> 00:11:04,890
Come on, Meg.
190
00:11:05,350 --> 00:11:09,090
You're never nice to me. You never cut
me any slack. I want to know why.
191
00:11:09,590 --> 00:11:10,770
Don't pull any punches.
192
00:11:12,330 --> 00:11:13,330
All right.
193
00:11:14,450 --> 00:11:16,430
All right. You want to know what the
deal is? I'll tell you.
194
00:11:19,190 --> 00:11:21,570
Jack has been my best friend for the
past 12 years.
195
00:11:22,030 --> 00:11:24,230
And then you waltz in, and that's the
end of me.
196
00:11:25,330 --> 00:11:26,790
Never thought something like that would
happen.
197
00:11:27,790 --> 00:11:28,790
But it did.
198
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:30,790
Besides, you don't like me.
199
00:11:31,930 --> 00:11:36,170
What do you mean, I don't like you? I
never said that. You don't have to say
200
00:11:36,170 --> 00:11:37,170
I can tell.
201
00:11:37,350 --> 00:11:39,590
I'm cheap seats, heavy salt, spilled
beer.
202
00:11:40,170 --> 00:11:41,170
Not your kind.
203
00:11:41,290 --> 00:11:43,110
Now, you see, you don't know what you're
talking about.
204
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:46,030
Actually, there's a lot about you that I
admire.
205
00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:47,790
Like what?
206
00:11:49,210 --> 00:11:51,350
Like the way you don't let things get to
you.
207
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:55,360
You put things into perspective, and you
don't mince your words. You just come
208
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,200
right out and say what's on your mind.
209
00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,180
You're really rude.
210
00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:02,240
Thanks. You're welcome.
211
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:04,880
And you know what?
212
00:12:05,820 --> 00:12:08,880
I guess I kind of noticed you're not the
pushover I thought you were.
213
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,220
It's pretty hard to make a go of a
restaurant I'd hang out in.
214
00:12:12,540 --> 00:12:13,620
I'm going to have to start tipping.
215
00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:17,440
You see, we're making headway here.
216
00:12:18,460 --> 00:12:19,460
So tell me.
217
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:22,010
Any special guy in your life?
218
00:12:22,730 --> 00:12:24,310
Yeah, you're really pushing it.
219
00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,110
Just answer the question.
220
00:12:27,630 --> 00:12:28,830
The answer is no.
221
00:12:29,530 --> 00:12:32,490
I tell you, I'm in such a slump, I might
be sent back down to the minors.
222
00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:35,670
Let's baseball talk for I haven't gotten
any in 15 months.
223
00:12:36,430 --> 00:12:38,310
15 months? Will you please?
224
00:12:38,630 --> 00:12:40,570
Amy Latter, they're going to put it up
on the scoreboard.
225
00:12:41,670 --> 00:12:47,070
Oh, God, I can't believe that slipped
out. You have to promise not to ever,
226
00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,110
repeat that.
227
00:12:48,650 --> 00:12:49,650
I mean it.
228
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:50,900
Not like I haven't had opportunities.
229
00:12:52,060 --> 00:12:53,060
I've had them.
230
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:54,960
I've had plenty.
231
00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:57,120
Plenty.
232
00:12:58,180 --> 00:12:59,980
Yeah, I know what you're going through.
233
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:05,360
The last year of my marriage to Kip was
completely sexless. Get out of here. An
234
00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:06,360
entire year?
235
00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:09,020
Charge!
236
00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:10,480
Charge.
237
00:13:11,020 --> 00:13:13,780
13 months and 7 days, to be exact.
238
00:13:14,140 --> 00:13:18,020
Thank God Jack came into my life before
I started listening to country music.
239
00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:21,080
He's not perfect.
240
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:23,780
Jack does have his quirks. Tell me about
it.
241
00:13:24,140 --> 00:13:30,560
I mean, I feel like I can't tell him
some things because he'll, you know,
242
00:13:30,640 --> 00:13:33,300
overreact. What kind of things?
243
00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:37,160
You have to promise not to tell Jack
this.
244
00:13:38,700 --> 00:13:40,580
Do you mind?
245
00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:42,460
We're talking here.
246
00:13:44,620 --> 00:13:45,880
Go on, Wally. What is it?
247
00:13:46,180 --> 00:13:48,000
I've been going to therapy once a week.
248
00:13:48,460 --> 00:13:49,460
Really?
249
00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:50,900
Just once a week?
250
00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:58,080
It's not like I'm psychotic or anything.
I mean, it's just that I drive myself
251
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:01,860
too hard, and I can't shake the feeling
of failure after my divorce. So I
252
00:14:01,860 --> 00:14:03,040
decided to see someone.
253
00:14:03,460 --> 00:14:05,980
But Jack's always putting down therapy.
254
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,920
He says if American Express will give
you a credit card, then you're stable
255
00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:11,780
enough to handle your problems by
yourself.
256
00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:15,660
Hey!
257
00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:18,140
Sorry it took so long, but...
258
00:14:18,410 --> 00:14:20,410
I was watching some idiot on his
cellular phone.
259
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:24,410
Couldn't find a nice, quiet place to
talk, so I went to a phone booth.
260
00:14:25,970 --> 00:14:26,970
Progress.
261
00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:30,510
So, anything good happen while I was
gone, gals?
262
00:14:30,950 --> 00:14:31,970
Oh, nothing much.
263
00:14:32,870 --> 00:14:33,870
Except this.
264
00:14:34,410 --> 00:14:35,710
I caught a fly ball.
265
00:14:35,990 --> 00:14:36,990
Get out of town!
266
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:41,470
She's got great hands, Jack. Just like
the Say Hey Kid plucked it right out of
267
00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:42,470
the air.
268
00:14:50,610 --> 00:14:51,990
Fantastic. Good for you.
269
00:14:52,470 --> 00:14:55,890
But you know what the odds are? Two fly
balls coming to my seat, I'm screwed for
270
00:14:55,890 --> 00:14:56,890
another 42 years.
271
00:14:57,830 --> 00:14:58,830
Well, then.
272
00:14:59,590 --> 00:15:00,910
My gift to you.
273
00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:03,130
May you cherish it always.
274
00:15:09,730 --> 00:15:16,670
So, anybody want coffee? I'll
275
00:15:16,670 --> 00:15:18,610
go. Yeah, I'll have one. Lots of sugar.
Okay.
276
00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:27,760
So, listen, is it my imagination or you
two almost getting along?
277
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,440
Yeah, actually, I guess we are.
278
00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:31,740
So what did you talk about while I was
gone?
279
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,200
Nothing. Just stuff.
280
00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:35,060
Like what?
281
00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:37,640
You weren't talking about me, were you?
282
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:39,280
Do you care?
283
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:40,219
Sure, no.
284
00:15:40,220 --> 00:15:41,680
We had the ball game, for God's sake.
285
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:45,500
She talked about me, didn't she?
286
00:15:46,140 --> 00:15:47,140
What did she say?
287
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:48,700
I can't tell you. It's private.
288
00:15:54,670 --> 00:15:57,790
possibly say to you that you couldn't
tell me your best friend for how many
289
00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:04,110
years may 12 12 years can we just drop
this jack and watch the game it's bad
290
00:16:04,110 --> 00:16:08,230
isn't it come on may you got to tell me
now look i am going to ask you a
291
00:16:08,230 --> 00:16:11,970
question i want a straight answer don't
hold back is wally seeing someone else
292
00:16:11,970 --> 00:16:18,850
leave it alone jack really oh my god i
had a feeling here every wednesday
293
00:16:18,850 --> 00:16:22,350
morning she disappears from 9 to 11 says
she's going to go see the fish guy but
294
00:16:22,350 --> 00:16:25,940
she never smells like fish Do I know
him? Is he Jewish?
295
00:16:26,180 --> 00:16:28,820
That'd be a real blow to the Jewish guy.
Jack, get a grip.
296
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:31,800
All right, look.
297
00:16:32,740 --> 00:16:33,880
You're my best friend.
298
00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:37,400
You're one of the few people I don't
enjoy seeing in pain, so I'm going to
299
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:40,100
you. But you can't tell anybody.
300
00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:43,820
Well, he isn't seeing another guy.
301
00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:44,939
Thank God.
302
00:16:44,940 --> 00:16:45,940
He's seeing a therapist.
303
00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:49,400
What? Are you kidding?
304
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:50,640
A therapist?
305
00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:52,840
Why couldn't she just be dating another
Jewish guy?
306
00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:56,380
What the hell is she in the therapist
for? She said she needs to talk to
307
00:16:56,380 --> 00:17:00,760
somebody. What about me? She can talk to
me. Other people talk to me. You talk
308
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:02,980
to me. Not as often as... Hi.
309
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,079
What? Nothing.
310
00:17:05,579 --> 00:17:07,640
Who are you just talking about? Who was
talking?
311
00:17:08,540 --> 00:17:10,319
All right, coffee's all around.
312
00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:15,280
God, all they had was non -dairy
creamer. They said I'm the only person
313
00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:17,880
ever complained in the entire history of
the stadium.
314
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,300
That could really be annoying.
315
00:17:20,859 --> 00:17:21,859
Did that annoy you?
316
00:17:23,140 --> 00:17:24,140
Yeah, I guess so.
317
00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:26,380
Something like that would annoy me.
318
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,099
You want to talk about it?
319
00:17:29,380 --> 00:17:30,380
No, not really.
320
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,340
It's okay, Wally. You can talk to me.
321
00:17:33,140 --> 00:17:34,540
I'm here to listen to you.
322
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:36,660
Absolutely free of charge, by the way.
323
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:37,920
Cannot, Stein.
324
00:17:37,980 --> 00:17:39,400
Jack, what the hell's going on?
325
00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:46,240
Wally, sweetie, I just wanted to ask...
Therapy? How could you be in therapy?
326
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:51,580
I'm going five minutes and you grab a
confidence.
327
00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:55,860
I couldn't help it. He's my friend. And
I'm not? I don't know you that long.
328
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,520
Well, I respect you enough not to tell
anybody that you haven't had sex in a
329
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:02,020
year and a half. You haven't had sex in
a year and a half?
330
00:18:02,300 --> 00:18:03,480
How could you do that?
331
00:18:04,820 --> 00:18:05,820
Fifteen months.
332
00:18:05,980 --> 00:18:07,620
Fifteen months. A big difference.
333
00:18:07,940 --> 00:18:09,100
A year and a half.
334
00:18:09,340 --> 00:18:11,060
Fifteen months is a big difference.
335
00:18:11,260 --> 00:18:14,480
Whatever it is, I bet you didn't have to
see a therapist about it.
336
00:18:35,950 --> 00:18:39,430
Okay, Meg, what else did she tell you?
What other secrets don't I know about?
337
00:18:39,530 --> 00:18:42,610
Any arrests, convictions, a few Village
People albums?
338
00:18:44,070 --> 00:18:45,150
This is a nightmare.
339
00:18:45,430 --> 00:18:47,890
I can't do this. I can't be both your
friends.
340
00:18:48,110 --> 00:18:51,230
Let's just go back to the way it was
where I still like Jack and I don't like
341
00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:52,870
Wally. Nothing personal.
342
00:18:53,270 --> 00:18:55,170
It'll just make everyone's life much
easier.
343
00:18:55,390 --> 00:19:00,110
By the way, Wally, for the future, only
morons yell bravo at a baseball game.
344
00:19:01,870 --> 00:19:02,689
Now, see?
345
00:19:02,690 --> 00:19:04,430
That works for me. Me too.
346
00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:09,580
Wally, the therapist, is it a man or a
woman? Oh, for God's sakes, Jack.
347
00:19:09,580 --> 00:19:12,560
if it's a woman, she's just going to
take your side and try and turn you
348
00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:13,960
me. It's a man. Oh.
349
00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:15,300
Well, is he good -looking?
350
00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:18,340
Because a lot of these male therapists,
they try and take advantage of their
351
00:19:18,340 --> 00:19:21,020
female patients because they're so
vulnerable and need comforting.
352
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,740
Dr. Bleckman is 65 years old. Oh, great.
353
00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:26,620
Dirty old man territory.
354
00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:31,200
Jack, will you stop it? Why are you so
threatened by this?
355
00:19:32,020 --> 00:19:33,880
Well, I'm not really mad that you're in
therapy.
356
00:19:34,490 --> 00:19:36,770
I'm just upset that you felt you
couldn't tell me something.
357
00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:41,090
Look, there's something you're going to
have to realize, and that is that I came
358
00:19:41,090 --> 00:19:44,730
into this relationship carrying some
baggage. And, oh, sure, we all like to
359
00:19:44,730 --> 00:19:48,310
think we can get by with a little
overnight bag, but at this point in my
360
00:19:48,310 --> 00:19:51,190
have the three -piece set, the suit bag,
the cosmetic case... I get it, Wally.
361
00:19:51,550 --> 00:19:56,510
Wally, I get it, I get it, I get it. So
anyway, even though I would love it if
362
00:19:56,510 --> 00:20:01,090
you could solve my every problem, you
can't. Don't say that, Wally.
363
00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:02,410
I'm sorry, honey.
364
00:20:02,790 --> 00:20:03,790
It's true.
365
00:20:04,360 --> 00:20:05,840
I hate this. I know.
366
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,380
So, do you talk about me there?
367
00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:13,720
Jack. What does he say about me? Does he
say I'm good for you? Jack!
368
00:20:14,460 --> 00:20:16,140
Do you think I'll ever have to go in?
369
00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:17,380
Yes!
370
00:20:18,220 --> 00:20:19,900
Oh, hi, Ray. Ray's back.
371
00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:22,100
So, did you return your watch? No.
372
00:20:22,460 --> 00:20:24,520
Don't tell me you got yourself a
matching purse.
373
00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:29,020
The guy wouldn't take it back.
374
00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:32,580
He said I wrecked it by stretching the
band around my big, meaty wrist.
375
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:37,520
On my way back from the store, I got
held up. Guy told me to give him
376
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,500
I had. No, don't tell me your watch was
stolen.
377
00:20:39,940 --> 00:20:40,940
Not exactly.
378
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,060
When I took it off, he said, ooh, a
girl's watch, and he skipped away.
379
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:48,680
You know what?
380
00:20:49,260 --> 00:20:53,680
I mean, today I took a deep look inside
myself, and I said, Ray, why are you so
381
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:54,680
insecure about this?
382
00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,800
I mean, I picked this watch out from
hundreds of watches because I like it.
383
00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:01,160
It's the one I wanted, and it's the one
I'm going to wear, and damn it, I don't
384
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,340
care what anybody thinks about it.
385
00:21:03,820 --> 00:21:04,820
Hey there, everybody.
386
00:21:05,340 --> 00:21:12,100
I just want to remind you all to watch
me tonight on Star
387
00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:13,180
Trek The Next Generation.
388
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:17,040
You won't actually see me. I'm playing
the voice of a menacing liquid that
389
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:18,040
corrodes the Enterprise.
390
00:21:19,900 --> 00:21:21,180
I don't know what to say.
391
00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:23,320
You know why I like coming into this
place?
392
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,920
Because it's like sitting down with
family.
393
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:31,360
Kip, I think it's only fair to tell you
we don't like you, dear.
394
00:21:33,980 --> 00:21:36,320
That's okay. My family doesn't like me
either, so what the heck?
395
00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:41,600
Whoa, nice watch there, Ray.
396
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:44,600
Really? You like it? Yeah, it's a beaut.
397
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:46,120
It's got a lot of character.
398
00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:47,520
Yeah, I love it too.
399
00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:52,640
But I, uh, I've had my heart set on this
other watch I saw.
400
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:54,440
Well, you know me, Mr.
401
00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:57,340
Practical. I just wouldn't feel right
having two nice watches.
402
00:21:58,160 --> 00:21:59,160
What are you saying, buddy?
403
00:22:00,120 --> 00:22:02,180
It kills me to say this, but, uh...
404
00:22:02,510 --> 00:22:05,270
If you wanted to buy this one, I could
give you a very nice price.
405
00:22:06,230 --> 00:22:07,230
Really?
406
00:22:08,270 --> 00:22:14,710
Well... Wait a minute. Is this a woman's
watch?
407
00:22:16,090 --> 00:22:17,370
A woman's watch?
408
00:22:17,930 --> 00:22:19,430
He thinks it's a woman's watch.
409
00:22:21,530 --> 00:22:25,130
No, no, Kipo, that's the style. I mean,
that's what all the guys are wearing.
410
00:22:25,330 --> 00:22:26,470
Where has he been hiding?
411
00:22:29,260 --> 00:22:32,760
I was just kidding. Can't you guys take
a joke? This watch is sold.
412
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,160
God, what a beautiful watch.
413
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:38,680
Thank you. It's new.
414
00:22:40,820 --> 00:22:43,940
Well, it's so elegant and stylish.
415
00:22:45,220 --> 00:22:49,000
You know, there are not a lot of men who
have the taste to even pick out a watch
416
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,000
like that.
417
00:22:50,340 --> 00:22:52,600
Well, what can I say? I've always been
special.
418
00:22:53,900 --> 00:22:54,900
Are you with anyone?
419
00:22:55,380 --> 00:22:58,180
Because if you aren't, I'd love to treat
you to dinner.
420
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:04,040
And then maybe later find some
interesting way to get that watch off of
421
00:23:07,700 --> 00:23:08,700
After you.
422
00:23:10,540 --> 00:23:13,040
Oh, yeah. It's a lady's watch, all
right.
423
00:23:14,980 --> 00:23:16,020
Used to be mine.
34036
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