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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:35,200 Eh! 2 00:00:37,870 --> 00:00:39,030 Cup of coffee, please. Yeah, 3 00:00:40,330 --> 00:00:42,290 nothing like a good cup of coffee in the middle of the afternoon. 4 00:00:43,370 --> 00:00:44,810 Not the middle, exactly. 5 00:00:45,450 --> 00:00:46,490 More 12 -ish, huh? 6 00:00:47,890 --> 00:00:49,110 1224, to be exact. 7 00:00:49,470 --> 00:00:50,470 Yay! 8 00:00:51,110 --> 00:00:52,770 What you got there, Ray? A new watch? 9 00:00:53,210 --> 00:00:54,210 You noticed, huh? 10 00:00:55,610 --> 00:00:57,390 Yep, it's new, all right. 11 00:00:58,070 --> 00:00:59,390 That must have set you back a little. 12 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:04,319 Yeah, I guess it's extravagant, but yesterday my tax refund came, and I 13 00:01:04,319 --> 00:01:08,820 it might be my last for the next 48 years, so I figured, what the hell, why 14 00:01:08,820 --> 00:01:12,440 treat yourself, huh? Yeah, and it'll give you something to pawn after the tax 15 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:13,440 hikes. 16 00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:15,000 Let me take a closer look at that, Ray. 17 00:01:15,260 --> 00:01:15,999 Hi, Ray. 18 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:18,420 Oh, what have we here? A new watch. 19 00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:21,380 Yeah, I've had my eye on this beauty for months now. 20 00:01:21,880 --> 00:01:23,000 Never thought I'd own it, though. 21 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:25,360 What do you think? I think it's very nice. 22 00:01:25,780 --> 00:01:28,140 The styling is so delicate. 23 00:01:28,890 --> 00:01:30,630 Is this what men are wearing these days? 24 00:01:32,310 --> 00:01:33,310 What are you saying? 25 00:01:33,390 --> 00:01:34,390 It's small? 26 00:01:34,590 --> 00:01:35,850 It's not small. It's elegant. 27 00:01:36,490 --> 00:01:38,210 Here, I'll show you. Wally knows fashion. 28 00:01:38,530 --> 00:01:40,270 Hey, Wally, take a look at my new watch. 29 00:01:40,490 --> 00:01:41,490 Oh, wow. 30 00:01:41,530 --> 00:01:43,990 That's gorgeous, Ray. Really elegant. 31 00:01:44,710 --> 00:01:46,750 Are men wearing little watches now? 32 00:01:47,970 --> 00:01:49,890 It's not that little. Oh, yes, it is. 33 00:01:50,450 --> 00:01:53,510 You want to know what I think? I think you got just enough of a girl's watch. 34 00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:56,550 Get out of here. 35 00:01:56,630 --> 00:01:57,910 This is no girl's watch. 36 00:01:58,400 --> 00:01:59,158 It's expensive. 37 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,520 Expensive watches look like them. 38 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:03,520 Oh, yeah? Then why is the band so skinny, huh? 39 00:02:03,780 --> 00:02:06,420 And look, look, you got it in the first hole tight as a drum. 40 00:02:06,620 --> 00:02:08,199 Your fingers are turning blue, man. 41 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:12,400 I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah. I bought a man's watch. I know a 42 00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:13,940 man's watch when I see one. Mm -hmm. 43 00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:15,780 Good afternoon, everybody. 44 00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:17,620 Okay, here we go. 45 00:02:17,860 --> 00:02:20,720 Hey, Mary Margaret, take a look at my new watch. 46 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:23,040 Oh, Ray. 47 00:02:24,540 --> 00:02:27,100 Granny Litvak finally passed away. I'm sorry. 48 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:29,980 That's it. It's going back. 49 00:02:30,640 --> 00:02:32,800 Oh, de -stress yourself, Ray. It's a beautiful day. 50 00:02:33,260 --> 00:02:34,340 You're smiling, Meg. 51 00:02:34,640 --> 00:02:35,660 You on painkillers? 52 00:02:36,780 --> 00:02:38,200 No, bartender Abe. 53 00:02:38,740 --> 00:02:41,700 I'm just a happy all -American girl. You know why? 54 00:02:42,140 --> 00:02:44,440 It's opening day. Oh, yeah, right, right. 55 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:48,260 Yup. Every year, Jack and I kick off the baseball season by going up to the 56 00:02:48,260 --> 00:02:51,400 house that Ruth built. We sit in the cheap seats, yell at the umps, and taunt 57 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,020 the other team's bullpen about why Slim Fast hasn't worked for them. 58 00:02:55,880 --> 00:02:56,619 I love baseball. 59 00:02:56,620 --> 00:03:00,020 I was a Little League mom for years. I know all about the game. For instance, 60 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,220 between innings, the players love sunflower seeds and orange slices. 61 00:03:03,580 --> 00:03:06,700 And if they win, they get so excited because they're taken to the Dairy Queen 62 00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:10,000 where each one gets a small cone and a dilly bar. That's why they run off the 63 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,380 field so fast at the end of the game. 64 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:15,180 You don't actually think Major Leaguers are running to the Dairy Queen, do you? 65 00:03:15,380 --> 00:03:18,960 No, of course not. They're headed to a hotel for staking prostitutes, but it's 66 00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:19,960 the same principle. 67 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:25,620 You know what the best part is? 68 00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:29,440 I'll get to spend an entire afternoon with Jack. The guy's my best friend, and 69 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:30,359 never see him anymore. 70 00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:31,940 Not since Princess Wally got here. 71 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:34,240 Hello, sports fans. 72 00:03:34,620 --> 00:03:36,720 Boy, baseball fever's really in the air. 73 00:03:36,940 --> 00:03:39,520 Even the thugs have switched over from guns to bats. 74 00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:44,580 Oh, you ready to go, Meg? I got my ticket, 50 bucks, and my mouth's all set 75 00:03:44,580 --> 00:03:47,920 the perfect ballpark, Frank. Cooked exactly the way it should be, under a 76 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:48,920 bulb. All right. 77 00:03:49,340 --> 00:03:50,259 Bye, guys. 78 00:03:50,260 --> 00:03:52,080 I'll be ready to go in a minute. Okay. 79 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:58,220 What? Nadine, I'm going to the game now. And don't name the lobsters tonight. 80 00:03:58,300 --> 00:03:59,420 You get too attached. 81 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:05,400 Okay, what are we waiting for? We've got a baseball game to go to. Excuse me. 82 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:06,520 What's going on here? 83 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:07,840 She's going? 84 00:04:08,220 --> 00:04:11,280 It's supposed to be just the two of us. That's the tradition. 85 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,620 Yeah, well, I invited Wally to join us. 86 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:16,700 And you want to go? Yeah, I want to go. 87 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:19,839 Well, like a lot? Just average or not that much? 88 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:22,040 Is there a problem here? 89 00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:25,200 Listen, I just thought it would be nice if the two most important women in my 90 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,980 life, you know, spent a little time together. 91 00:04:27,220 --> 00:04:28,540 It's not like I'm ripping your heart out, Meg. 92 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:30,000 Well, I mean, is that an option? 93 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:32,060 I mean, look at her with that mitt. 94 00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,239 It's Ray's. 95 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,700 He gave it to me for catching fly balls. 96 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:38,240 Ray. 97 00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:39,940 Oh, man, Ray. 98 00:04:40,340 --> 00:04:43,280 No self -respecting man takes a mitt to a ball game. 99 00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:46,420 Must everything be a test of my manhood? 100 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,920 You know, Meg, you've been trying to come in between me and Wally since the 101 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:55,220 beginning. Now, it's not going to work. When are you going to realize that we 102 00:04:55,220 --> 00:04:56,480 are for real? Oh, please. 103 00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:59,480 Ten to one, you two will break up before they start hiding Al Gore. 104 00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:05,880 How could you do it, Jack? How could you invite Wally to our opening day? 105 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:09,200 All I want is for you two to be friends. Is that too much to ask? Yes. 106 00:05:23,270 --> 00:05:26,030 Is it customary for people to breed at baseball games? 107 00:05:26,710 --> 00:05:28,970 Are you sure we can't get better seats? 108 00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:32,150 We can get better seats, but, you know, we like sitting here. You know, the 109 00:05:32,150 --> 00:05:35,190 cheap seats with the real fans. Yeah, every time I come, I'm locked in a press 110 00:05:35,190 --> 00:05:37,430 box. I never get to experience the game with the civilians. 111 00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:39,670 Except once a year, with Jack. 112 00:05:40,170 --> 00:05:43,270 It's our tradition that we've been observing for eight years. 113 00:05:43,790 --> 00:05:48,210 Jack and I. All right, fine, I can live with that. No problem. 114 00:05:48,470 --> 00:05:49,990 Come on, you lazy bums! 115 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,050 Five million a year and you can't stop. Why can't I? 116 00:05:53,510 --> 00:05:57,450 My mother can move faster than you, you bunch of Barbie dolls! 117 00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:04,530 This is just a question, but why do all the men in our section have their 118 00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:06,010 stomachs hanging over their belts? 119 00:06:06,290 --> 00:06:07,290 It's a look. 120 00:06:08,090 --> 00:06:11,110 Okay, Jack, here we go. Here comes the first pitch of the season. 121 00:06:12,290 --> 00:06:13,290 Steer right! 122 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,020 The hat. What? 123 00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:24,780 Wally, honey, look, 124 00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:29,600 that hat, let me see. You got it all wrong. My head's filling the hollow 125 00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:30,900 What else is there to know? 126 00:06:31,660 --> 00:06:35,380 Wally, honey, this is not a baseball cap. You know, when the bill is bigger 127 00:06:35,380 --> 00:06:39,480 the part that fits over your head, you've crossed the line from baseball 128 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:41,040 some sort of yachting thing. 129 00:06:42,420 --> 00:06:44,840 Look around. This is not exactly a nautical group. 130 00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:47,240 Some of these people haven't seen water in months. 131 00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:49,240 I don't care. I'm wearing... 132 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:57,920 Molly, honey, I don't think you have to worry about your mitt. 133 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,740 I've been going to baseball games ever since all the owners were racist bigots, 134 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:02,960 and I've never caught a foul ball. 135 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:10,940 Three bags up here. 136 00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:13,680 That kid looks familiar. 137 00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:16,460 Hey! Hey! 138 00:07:16,780 --> 00:07:18,800 Watch it, pal! What are you doing? 139 00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:23,040 What am I doing? That kid threw those peanuts right at me. He aimed at me. 140 00:07:23,180 --> 00:07:25,180 That's what he's supposed to do. It's part of the... 141 00:07:25,590 --> 00:07:29,770 fear. Well, somebody should have told me that. Well, now you know. 142 00:07:30,010 --> 00:07:31,070 Now I know. 143 00:07:31,530 --> 00:07:35,530 Hey, that was deliberate. Did you see that? That was deliberate. No, it 144 00:07:35,530 --> 00:07:37,610 Wally. Yeah, it was. That'll be two bucks. 145 00:07:39,890 --> 00:07:43,350 Wait a minute. Aren't you the kid that delivered our deli food last week? Yeah, 146 00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:46,450 that can't be. Mr. Cat's coming with his wife. But he wasn't exactly twisting 147 00:07:46,450 --> 00:07:47,450 around. 148 00:07:49,210 --> 00:07:51,150 Oh, hey, two bags of peanuts down here. 149 00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:54,790 Show off, little runt. 150 00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,640 The kid's money for the peanut guy. 151 00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:01,360 Here. 152 00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:04,180 Guy, we got a problem, man. We're a little short. It's $1 .75. 153 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:05,440 I need two bucks. 154 00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,220 Excuse me, little boy. You're short 25 cents. 155 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:12,360 What are you talking about? I passed down eight quarters. 156 00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:13,820 Count it again. 157 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,280 Count it again. 158 00:08:15,380 --> 00:08:17,960 I did. You're short. What are you trying to do, lady? Pinch the kid's coin? 159 00:08:18,740 --> 00:08:23,400 Oh, this is insane. You know what you are? You're a menace to society. Yeah, 160 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:24,520 like you aren't. All right, look. 161 00:08:24,780 --> 00:08:27,040 I have a quarter. Forget it. 162 00:08:27,690 --> 00:08:31,030 Obviously trying to rip us off for 25 cents. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm doing. 163 00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:33,250 Then I can buy that nice villa in France I've had my eye on. 164 00:08:33,850 --> 00:08:34,789 Sit down. 165 00:08:34,789 --> 00:08:36,049 I am missing the game. 166 00:08:36,370 --> 00:08:37,409 Here is your quarter. 167 00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:38,630 Now take a hike. 168 00:08:39,270 --> 00:08:40,309 Ah, must I go? 169 00:08:40,950 --> 00:08:43,690 All right, I just want to tell you, it's been sheer heaven seeing a boat of 170 00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:44,690 yours again. 171 00:08:45,450 --> 00:08:46,910 Peanuts in the shell. Go to hell. 172 00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:51,550 Okay, two up, two down. Let's get one more and we... 173 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:11,800 just spilled a beer on my back. Oh, it seeped me through. 174 00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:15,540 I really feel very sorry about that lady. 175 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:17,800 $3 .50 down the drain. 176 00:09:20,580 --> 00:09:26,120 Holly, take my jacket. I'll go and try and get this drawn off or something. 177 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,780 wait. Aren't you that guy, the columnist Jack Stein? 178 00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:33,540 Yeah, that's me. Baseball fans are the greatest. This is my wife. 179 00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,840 She hates your guts. 180 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:45,059 What's your name? 181 00:09:45,060 --> 00:09:47,800 Marion. To Fat Marion. 182 00:09:49,220 --> 00:09:50,280 Get a life. 183 00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:51,900 Jack Stein. 184 00:09:52,680 --> 00:09:54,620 Thank you very much, Jack. 185 00:10:52,430 --> 00:10:54,910 That guy's up because he's a designated hitter. No, not that. 186 00:10:55,830 --> 00:10:57,250 Meg, why don't you like me? 187 00:10:58,710 --> 00:10:59,710 Oh, man. 188 00:11:00,330 --> 00:11:01,490 Can I sit with you? 189 00:11:02,630 --> 00:11:04,890 Come on, Meg. 190 00:11:05,350 --> 00:11:09,090 You're never nice to me. You never cut me any slack. I want to know why. 191 00:11:09,590 --> 00:11:10,770 Don't pull any punches. 192 00:11:12,330 --> 00:11:13,330 All right. 193 00:11:14,450 --> 00:11:16,430 All right. You want to know what the deal is? I'll tell you. 194 00:11:19,190 --> 00:11:21,570 Jack has been my best friend for the past 12 years. 195 00:11:22,030 --> 00:11:24,230 And then you waltz in, and that's the end of me. 196 00:11:25,330 --> 00:11:26,790 Never thought something like that would happen. 197 00:11:27,790 --> 00:11:28,790 But it did. 198 00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:30,790 Besides, you don't like me. 199 00:11:31,930 --> 00:11:36,170 What do you mean, I don't like you? I never said that. You don't have to say 200 00:11:36,170 --> 00:11:37,170 I can tell. 201 00:11:37,350 --> 00:11:39,590 I'm cheap seats, heavy salt, spilled beer. 202 00:11:40,170 --> 00:11:41,170 Not your kind. 203 00:11:41,290 --> 00:11:43,110 Now, you see, you don't know what you're talking about. 204 00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:46,030 Actually, there's a lot about you that I admire. 205 00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:47,790 Like what? 206 00:11:49,210 --> 00:11:51,350 Like the way you don't let things get to you. 207 00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:55,360 You put things into perspective, and you don't mince your words. You just come 208 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,200 right out and say what's on your mind. 209 00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,180 You're really rude. 210 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:02,240 Thanks. You're welcome. 211 00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:04,880 And you know what? 212 00:12:05,820 --> 00:12:08,880 I guess I kind of noticed you're not the pushover I thought you were. 213 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,220 It's pretty hard to make a go of a restaurant I'd hang out in. 214 00:12:12,540 --> 00:12:13,620 I'm going to have to start tipping. 215 00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:17,440 You see, we're making headway here. 216 00:12:18,460 --> 00:12:19,460 So tell me. 217 00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:22,010 Any special guy in your life? 218 00:12:22,730 --> 00:12:24,310 Yeah, you're really pushing it. 219 00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,110 Just answer the question. 220 00:12:27,630 --> 00:12:28,830 The answer is no. 221 00:12:29,530 --> 00:12:32,490 I tell you, I'm in such a slump, I might be sent back down to the minors. 222 00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:35,670 Let's baseball talk for I haven't gotten any in 15 months. 223 00:12:36,430 --> 00:12:38,310 15 months? Will you please? 224 00:12:38,630 --> 00:12:40,570 Amy Latter, they're going to put it up on the scoreboard. 225 00:12:41,670 --> 00:12:47,070 Oh, God, I can't believe that slipped out. You have to promise not to ever, 226 00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,110 repeat that. 227 00:12:48,650 --> 00:12:49,650 I mean it. 228 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:50,900 Not like I haven't had opportunities. 229 00:12:52,060 --> 00:12:53,060 I've had them. 230 00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:54,960 I've had plenty. 231 00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:57,120 Plenty. 232 00:12:58,180 --> 00:12:59,980 Yeah, I know what you're going through. 233 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:05,360 The last year of my marriage to Kip was completely sexless. Get out of here. An 234 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:06,360 entire year? 235 00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:09,020 Charge! 236 00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:10,480 Charge. 237 00:13:11,020 --> 00:13:13,780 13 months and 7 days, to be exact. 238 00:13:14,140 --> 00:13:18,020 Thank God Jack came into my life before I started listening to country music. 239 00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:21,080 He's not perfect. 240 00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:23,780 Jack does have his quirks. Tell me about it. 241 00:13:24,140 --> 00:13:30,560 I mean, I feel like I can't tell him some things because he'll, you know, 242 00:13:30,640 --> 00:13:33,300 overreact. What kind of things? 243 00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:37,160 You have to promise not to tell Jack this. 244 00:13:38,700 --> 00:13:40,580 Do you mind? 245 00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:42,460 We're talking here. 246 00:13:44,620 --> 00:13:45,880 Go on, Wally. What is it? 247 00:13:46,180 --> 00:13:48,000 I've been going to therapy once a week. 248 00:13:48,460 --> 00:13:49,460 Really? 249 00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:50,900 Just once a week? 250 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:58,080 It's not like I'm psychotic or anything. I mean, it's just that I drive myself 251 00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:01,860 too hard, and I can't shake the feeling of failure after my divorce. So I 252 00:14:01,860 --> 00:14:03,040 decided to see someone. 253 00:14:03,460 --> 00:14:05,980 But Jack's always putting down therapy. 254 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,920 He says if American Express will give you a credit card, then you're stable 255 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:11,780 enough to handle your problems by yourself. 256 00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:15,660 Hey! 257 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:18,140 Sorry it took so long, but... 258 00:14:18,410 --> 00:14:20,410 I was watching some idiot on his cellular phone. 259 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:24,410 Couldn't find a nice, quiet place to talk, so I went to a phone booth. 260 00:14:25,970 --> 00:14:26,970 Progress. 261 00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:30,510 So, anything good happen while I was gone, gals? 262 00:14:30,950 --> 00:14:31,970 Oh, nothing much. 263 00:14:32,870 --> 00:14:33,870 Except this. 264 00:14:34,410 --> 00:14:35,710 I caught a fly ball. 265 00:14:35,990 --> 00:14:36,990 Get out of town! 266 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:41,470 She's got great hands, Jack. Just like the Say Hey Kid plucked it right out of 267 00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:42,470 the air. 268 00:14:50,610 --> 00:14:51,990 Fantastic. Good for you. 269 00:14:52,470 --> 00:14:55,890 But you know what the odds are? Two fly balls coming to my seat, I'm screwed for 270 00:14:55,890 --> 00:14:56,890 another 42 years. 271 00:14:57,830 --> 00:14:58,830 Well, then. 272 00:14:59,590 --> 00:15:00,910 My gift to you. 273 00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:03,130 May you cherish it always. 274 00:15:09,730 --> 00:15:16,670 So, anybody want coffee? I'll 275 00:15:16,670 --> 00:15:18,610 go. Yeah, I'll have one. Lots of sugar. Okay. 276 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:27,760 So, listen, is it my imagination or you two almost getting along? 277 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,440 Yeah, actually, I guess we are. 278 00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:31,740 So what did you talk about while I was gone? 279 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,200 Nothing. Just stuff. 280 00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:35,060 Like what? 281 00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:37,640 You weren't talking about me, were you? 282 00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:39,280 Do you care? 283 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:40,219 Sure, no. 284 00:15:40,220 --> 00:15:41,680 We had the ball game, for God's sake. 285 00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:45,500 She talked about me, didn't she? 286 00:15:46,140 --> 00:15:47,140 What did she say? 287 00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:48,700 I can't tell you. It's private. 288 00:15:54,670 --> 00:15:57,790 possibly say to you that you couldn't tell me your best friend for how many 289 00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:04,110 years may 12 12 years can we just drop this jack and watch the game it's bad 290 00:16:04,110 --> 00:16:08,230 isn't it come on may you got to tell me now look i am going to ask you a 291 00:16:08,230 --> 00:16:11,970 question i want a straight answer don't hold back is wally seeing someone else 292 00:16:11,970 --> 00:16:18,850 leave it alone jack really oh my god i had a feeling here every wednesday 293 00:16:18,850 --> 00:16:22,350 morning she disappears from 9 to 11 says she's going to go see the fish guy but 294 00:16:22,350 --> 00:16:25,940 she never smells like fish Do I know him? Is he Jewish? 295 00:16:26,180 --> 00:16:28,820 That'd be a real blow to the Jewish guy. Jack, get a grip. 296 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:31,800 All right, look. 297 00:16:32,740 --> 00:16:33,880 You're my best friend. 298 00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:37,400 You're one of the few people I don't enjoy seeing in pain, so I'm going to 299 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:40,100 you. But you can't tell anybody. 300 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:43,820 Well, he isn't seeing another guy. 301 00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:44,939 Thank God. 302 00:16:44,940 --> 00:16:45,940 He's seeing a therapist. 303 00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:49,400 What? Are you kidding? 304 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:50,640 A therapist? 305 00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:52,840 Why couldn't she just be dating another Jewish guy? 306 00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:56,380 What the hell is she in the therapist for? She said she needs to talk to 307 00:16:56,380 --> 00:17:00,760 somebody. What about me? She can talk to me. Other people talk to me. You talk 308 00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:02,980 to me. Not as often as... Hi. 309 00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,079 What? Nothing. 310 00:17:05,579 --> 00:17:07,640 Who are you just talking about? Who was talking? 311 00:17:08,540 --> 00:17:10,319 All right, coffee's all around. 312 00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:15,280 God, all they had was non -dairy creamer. They said I'm the only person 313 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:17,880 ever complained in the entire history of the stadium. 314 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,300 That could really be annoying. 315 00:17:20,859 --> 00:17:21,859 Did that annoy you? 316 00:17:23,140 --> 00:17:24,140 Yeah, I guess so. 317 00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:26,380 Something like that would annoy me. 318 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,099 You want to talk about it? 319 00:17:29,380 --> 00:17:30,380 No, not really. 320 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,340 It's okay, Wally. You can talk to me. 321 00:17:33,140 --> 00:17:34,540 I'm here to listen to you. 322 00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:36,660 Absolutely free of charge, by the way. 323 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:37,920 Cannot, Stein. 324 00:17:37,980 --> 00:17:39,400 Jack, what the hell's going on? 325 00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:46,240 Wally, sweetie, I just wanted to ask... Therapy? How could you be in therapy? 326 00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:51,580 I'm going five minutes and you grab a confidence. 327 00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:55,860 I couldn't help it. He's my friend. And I'm not? I don't know you that long. 328 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,520 Well, I respect you enough not to tell anybody that you haven't had sex in a 329 00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:02,020 year and a half. You haven't had sex in a year and a half? 330 00:18:02,300 --> 00:18:03,480 How could you do that? 331 00:18:04,820 --> 00:18:05,820 Fifteen months. 332 00:18:05,980 --> 00:18:07,620 Fifteen months. A big difference. 333 00:18:07,940 --> 00:18:09,100 A year and a half. 334 00:18:09,340 --> 00:18:11,060 Fifteen months is a big difference. 335 00:18:11,260 --> 00:18:14,480 Whatever it is, I bet you didn't have to see a therapist about it. 336 00:18:35,950 --> 00:18:39,430 Okay, Meg, what else did she tell you? What other secrets don't I know about? 337 00:18:39,530 --> 00:18:42,610 Any arrests, convictions, a few Village People albums? 338 00:18:44,070 --> 00:18:45,150 This is a nightmare. 339 00:18:45,430 --> 00:18:47,890 I can't do this. I can't be both your friends. 340 00:18:48,110 --> 00:18:51,230 Let's just go back to the way it was where I still like Jack and I don't like 341 00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:52,870 Wally. Nothing personal. 342 00:18:53,270 --> 00:18:55,170 It'll just make everyone's life much easier. 343 00:18:55,390 --> 00:19:00,110 By the way, Wally, for the future, only morons yell bravo at a baseball game. 344 00:19:01,870 --> 00:19:02,689 Now, see? 345 00:19:02,690 --> 00:19:04,430 That works for me. Me too. 346 00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:09,580 Wally, the therapist, is it a man or a woman? Oh, for God's sakes, Jack. 347 00:19:09,580 --> 00:19:12,560 if it's a woman, she's just going to take your side and try and turn you 348 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:13,960 me. It's a man. Oh. 349 00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:15,300 Well, is he good -looking? 350 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:18,340 Because a lot of these male therapists, they try and take advantage of their 351 00:19:18,340 --> 00:19:21,020 female patients because they're so vulnerable and need comforting. 352 00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,740 Dr. Bleckman is 65 years old. Oh, great. 353 00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:26,620 Dirty old man territory. 354 00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:31,200 Jack, will you stop it? Why are you so threatened by this? 355 00:19:32,020 --> 00:19:33,880 Well, I'm not really mad that you're in therapy. 356 00:19:34,490 --> 00:19:36,770 I'm just upset that you felt you couldn't tell me something. 357 00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:41,090 Look, there's something you're going to have to realize, and that is that I came 358 00:19:41,090 --> 00:19:44,730 into this relationship carrying some baggage. And, oh, sure, we all like to 359 00:19:44,730 --> 00:19:48,310 think we can get by with a little overnight bag, but at this point in my 360 00:19:48,310 --> 00:19:51,190 have the three -piece set, the suit bag, the cosmetic case... I get it, Wally. 361 00:19:51,550 --> 00:19:56,510 Wally, I get it, I get it, I get it. So anyway, even though I would love it if 362 00:19:56,510 --> 00:20:01,090 you could solve my every problem, you can't. Don't say that, Wally. 363 00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:02,410 I'm sorry, honey. 364 00:20:02,790 --> 00:20:03,790 It's true. 365 00:20:04,360 --> 00:20:05,840 I hate this. I know. 366 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,380 So, do you talk about me there? 367 00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:13,720 Jack. What does he say about me? Does he say I'm good for you? Jack! 368 00:20:14,460 --> 00:20:16,140 Do you think I'll ever have to go in? 369 00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:17,380 Yes! 370 00:20:18,220 --> 00:20:19,900 Oh, hi, Ray. Ray's back. 371 00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:22,100 So, did you return your watch? No. 372 00:20:22,460 --> 00:20:24,520 Don't tell me you got yourself a matching purse. 373 00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:29,020 The guy wouldn't take it back. 374 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:32,580 He said I wrecked it by stretching the band around my big, meaty wrist. 375 00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:37,520 On my way back from the store, I got held up. Guy told me to give him 376 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,500 I had. No, don't tell me your watch was stolen. 377 00:20:39,940 --> 00:20:40,940 Not exactly. 378 00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,060 When I took it off, he said, ooh, a girl's watch, and he skipped away. 379 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:48,680 You know what? 380 00:20:49,260 --> 00:20:53,680 I mean, today I took a deep look inside myself, and I said, Ray, why are you so 381 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:54,680 insecure about this? 382 00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,800 I mean, I picked this watch out from hundreds of watches because I like it. 383 00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:01,160 It's the one I wanted, and it's the one I'm going to wear, and damn it, I don't 384 00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,340 care what anybody thinks about it. 385 00:21:03,820 --> 00:21:04,820 Hey there, everybody. 386 00:21:05,340 --> 00:21:12,100 I just want to remind you all to watch me tonight on Star 387 00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:13,180 Trek The Next Generation. 388 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:17,040 You won't actually see me. I'm playing the voice of a menacing liquid that 389 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:18,040 corrodes the Enterprise. 390 00:21:19,900 --> 00:21:21,180 I don't know what to say. 391 00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:23,320 You know why I like coming into this place? 392 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,920 Because it's like sitting down with family. 393 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:31,360 Kip, I think it's only fair to tell you we don't like you, dear. 394 00:21:33,980 --> 00:21:36,320 That's okay. My family doesn't like me either, so what the heck? 395 00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:41,600 Whoa, nice watch there, Ray. 396 00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:44,600 Really? You like it? Yeah, it's a beaut. 397 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:46,120 It's got a lot of character. 398 00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:47,520 Yeah, I love it too. 399 00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:52,640 But I, uh, I've had my heart set on this other watch I saw. 400 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:54,440 Well, you know me, Mr. 401 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:57,340 Practical. I just wouldn't feel right having two nice watches. 402 00:21:58,160 --> 00:21:59,160 What are you saying, buddy? 403 00:22:00,120 --> 00:22:02,180 It kills me to say this, but, uh... 404 00:22:02,510 --> 00:22:05,270 If you wanted to buy this one, I could give you a very nice price. 405 00:22:06,230 --> 00:22:07,230 Really? 406 00:22:08,270 --> 00:22:14,710 Well... Wait a minute. Is this a woman's watch? 407 00:22:16,090 --> 00:22:17,370 A woman's watch? 408 00:22:17,930 --> 00:22:19,430 He thinks it's a woman's watch. 409 00:22:21,530 --> 00:22:25,130 No, no, Kipo, that's the style. I mean, that's what all the guys are wearing. 410 00:22:25,330 --> 00:22:26,470 Where has he been hiding? 411 00:22:29,260 --> 00:22:32,760 I was just kidding. Can't you guys take a joke? This watch is sold. 412 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,160 God, what a beautiful watch. 413 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:38,680 Thank you. It's new. 414 00:22:40,820 --> 00:22:43,940 Well, it's so elegant and stylish. 415 00:22:45,220 --> 00:22:49,000 You know, there are not a lot of men who have the taste to even pick out a watch 416 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,000 like that. 417 00:22:50,340 --> 00:22:52,600 Well, what can I say? I've always been special. 418 00:22:53,900 --> 00:22:54,900 Are you with anyone? 419 00:22:55,380 --> 00:22:58,180 Because if you aren't, I'd love to treat you to dinner. 420 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:04,040 And then maybe later find some interesting way to get that watch off of 421 00:23:07,700 --> 00:23:08,700 After you. 422 00:23:10,540 --> 00:23:13,040 Oh, yeah. It's a lady's watch, all right. 423 00:23:14,980 --> 00:23:16,020 Used to be mine. 34036

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