All language subtitles for The Latest Buzz s03e15 The Extreme Shakespeare

I'm telling you, it was funny. You had
to be there. We were there. The waitress

saying, Banana Boothy, not that funny.

Whoa.

Something seems different around here.
You look like an animal that just been

danger. Let's hope this doesn't end with
a lion lunching on his dinner.

Oh, no.

It's not danger, I sense.

Not danger at all.

My Michael! Mom, how long has it been?

This morning at breakfast.

Wilder, I trust you pulled your grades
up.

Amanda, let me see those earrings.

Oh, did you pick them because they make
your head droop?

Speaking of which, Rebecca, quit
slouching.

Noah, maybe she's slouching because
she's depressed about your hair.

Isn't she great?

Why do I get the feeling we're the ones
in danger?

Seriously, is it that bad?

The way to get out and hang out with my
friends.

Find out what's new. Don't question on
who.

And who's after what's new.

It's a whole new thing.

In the pages of my magazine.

came to drop off Michael's after -school
snack, she offered to stay and help me

organize my day planner.

You're in good hands. A trade
publication once named my mom one of

organizers to watch.

I had to give it up when my Michael was
born. When one dream ended, another

began.

Everyone can benefit from a little extra
organization.

Exactly.

Like if Noah had been better organized,
he wouldn't have missed that dinner we

had two weeks ago.

Shame on Noah.

Well, showing up to dinner empty -handed
isn't much better, dear.

Looks like you got on the shame train
one stop too early.

Great grub, by the way. I love food I
can eat with my hands. You were eating

mashed potatoes.

Let's say we get back to working on my
day planner.

Great idea.

Can I come watch an artist at work?

Oh, Michael, it's not art.

It's a science.

Michael's mom is the best.

I love her. Because of Mrs. D, my table
manners have improved.

My eating over the sink manners still
need work.

She makes me realize I should smile more
when being brutally honest.

What? This is the ass nine. Somebody has
to tell Michael how pushy his mom is.

No way, dude.

Mothers before brothers.

You can't say anything bad to a friend
about his mom. You have to do the noble

thing. Make fun of her behind her back?

No. Force him to say something bad first
and then agree.

All right, but making fun of her behind
her back is so much easier.

The worst part about being a teacher was
when they picked partners, because it

was always one kid that got left alone.

You always felt sorry for that kid. So
now you've got to put that kid with the

two girls. And he does nothing.

He just stares up into space while
they're talking about the giraffe.

He still gets 7 out of 10, though,
because I marked him the night before,

there's nothing he can do about it.

What are you doing?

I'm taking notes from my article.

Being a class clown and where it may
lead you.

From the looks of things, telling jokes
to six people at the blurb. Sounds like

a warning.

Quiet. The comedian may hear you. You
don't want to draw attention to

Excuse me. Talking girl. What are you
doing? Are you writing down my whole

No, you seem to know it pretty well
already.

What's this for?

I'm writing an article on Class Clown.

I had him in my third grade class that I
wanted to interview, but he's still in

detention.

I'm going to read this article.
Seriously.

Subscribers?

I have a pretty good feeling they're
probably just going to skip that page.

See? You should leave comedy to the
professionals.

That's why I have the talking stick,
where it makes my voice nice and loud.

Well, there's something terrible that's
happened.

I know.

It should not be this hard to put pepper
on my sandwich.

No, for her birthday, I gave my
stepmother a coupon book full of things

she'd never make me do. You mean like
cooking and cleaning?

Exactly. But then she handed me this.

A coupon for one free day of
babysitting.

This won't be so bad.

Your stepmom's old enough to take care
of herself. Just put on the TV and help

her with her drawings.

It's not for her. It's for when my new
baby brother -slash -sister is born.

Her way of telling me I'll have to help
out.

Then to me, maybe the thing you should
do is help out.

But I don't know the first thing about
taking care of babies.

I have just the thing.

Meet the interbrat. It looks like an
egg.

It's not an egg at all. It's an egg
-shaped orb. You connect it to the

to learn how to take care of a real
baby.

I used it when my parents adopted my
baby sister.

Your family adopted a sister? Why have I
never heard of her? I told you about

you, eh?

That's a sister? I thought you were
sneezing.

This would be great. I'll connect you
online.

Now, the program tracks how well it's
rested, fed, and hugged.

I don't know.

You'll do great.

All you need is dedication and smarts,
and you have both.

You're right. Plus, I'm good -looking.
With a face like this, I'll be the best

introvert mother ever.

Amanda.

Don't you wander off like that again.

Kids, huh?

It's good.

See?

Beth laughed at the professional?

It means that professional comedians are
better. I know what it means, but I got

laughed too.

Well, of course you did, dear.

But not everyone can be funny like my
Michael.

He used to dress in his dad's suit and
do impressions of everyone in the

How did that one of your father go
again?

Take off my suit.

My little man.

Oh, you'll be one soon.

Michael used to have thin arms like you,
and look at him now. With the right

food and a little luck, you'll get
there.

Isn't she great?

With the right foods and a little luck,
maybe I can be that great, too.

What's that supposed to mean?

Mother's before brothers.

It means that your mother has a point.

My arms are scrawny.

One's getting ready to bruise.

Must have been a rough night. Don't feel
bad. One time to get Orby

to sleep. I read the same bedtime story
five times.

Didn't help that I fell asleep every
time I read it.

Not me. I sang half a lullaby, and he
was out like a light.

That's impossible.

Wait a minute. According to the data,
Orby is well -rested, fed, burped,

changed, and bathed. And I'm setting up
meetings for the right preschools. I'm

not letting him get mixed up with the
wrong orb.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Mommy
Me synchronized swimming class to get

to.

That's so funny, huh?

Just enjoying a slice of sweet comedy
pie I baked with my own hands.

It's my stand -up routine.

See for yourself.

Okay.

Why do they call drinks ice cold? Only
ice can be ice cold.

I got five minutes on that.

I see.

Chemical properties of a solid? Oh,
yeah. I went there.

Why do they call them practical jokes?

Shouldn't they be called impractical
jokes?

What's the deal with milkshakes? You
don't shake them. It's more of a

process. Rebecca, these jokes, they're
really not

good.

You laughed at them. I smirked at one,
was completely stone -faced for the

and the third. I'm trying to repress.

Funny yesterday at the blurb. You saw. I
saw people laughing, but... But

nothing. I had them in stitches, and
these jokes are every bit as funny.

I guess we'll never know.

Oh, we'll know. I'm trying them out. At
home? Into a hairbrush?

In the bathroom? On stage.

Into a microphone at the blurb. And you
better not be drinking a smoothie while

I'm up there. I don't want anything
coming out of your nose while you're

laughing.

Why do they call it a cup of tea? How
did that letter get a drink named after

it? You never see anyone drinking a cup
of you.

Whoa.

I'm saving that for my encore.

Mr. D just gave me a lecture about
playing too many video games. At least

what I think she said.

I was playing a video game.

You'll wake Orby.

Let's check your scores.

Hmm.

You scored higher than anyone.

You could be up for an endorsement deal.
Think of it. You could be the face of

faceless orb parenting.

No, thanks.

I'm doing this for the love of an egg
-shaped child.

Let's take a look at this little guy. I
told you he's sleeping.

Okay, Amanda.

You're such a good mom, I should leave
now before you burnt me.

Then again... Not a chance.

Hello, Daddy's assistant.

Good job keeping the orb alive.

Oh, B -D -Dub, put on your swim cap
because you have a Mommy and Me

Sim Classes app.

P -D -Y -L.

Oh, Mrs. Baby's heard about my comedy
debut, and she put all my jokes on index

cards. She even changed the wording on
some.

She's tarnishing my gold.

You're right. We should probably just
burn them all, you know, to be safe.

Haha, you're always the funny one. Now
it's my turn.

Batter up.

Mrs. D pulled a sandwich right out of my
mouth. She said I was boiling my

appetite.

Boiling it? I was challenging it. That's
what appetites are for.

Maybe just try to force me to eat some
half -eaten sandwich.

Mothers before brothers rule still
apply.

Just get Michael to say something bad
first. It's our only hope.

My mother's having so much fun with all
of you. Not as much as we are.

You guys sure you want around this
often? I wish she could be around more

Well, I've got some great news. In order
to make this all more efficient, DJ's

keeping it for the month.

Yay!

First off, you all need to stop
lollygagging around.

The Davies train to efficiency is
pulling out of the station.

Woo -woo!

So what do you think?

Woo -woo?

Woo -woo!

It'll be the best thing for both of you.
Trust me, she needs you more than you

know.

Who was that?

I've reorganized your day planner.

Uh, where are all the loose papers?

Attached. Safety first.

They were loose on purpose.

Uh, who was just on the phone? I've also
moved your appointments for next week

so they all take place in the same part
of town.

You canceled my meeting with the head of
MDG Music?

I've been waiting a month for that
meeting.

Mrs. Davies?

Who were you just talking to?

Your mom.

You're having lunch with her rather than
that MDG music guy. You need bonding

time. The topics will be how much
chocolate you eat and that vase you

you were eight. You're apologizing and
meaning it this time.

I need chocolate.

You do eat a lot of chocolate, dear.

There's my boy.

Hey,

why can't I see the little guy? Because
it's mommy and me time.

I just want to play this little piggy
with him.

But he doesn't even have toes.

I was going to use mine. Let me see the
baby. It's my baby.

Hey,

Orby isn't green or melon -like.

You got a fake, fake baby to replace
your actual fake baby?

Father, I can explain. There's no
explaining this. You neglected the

lied, and dropped an innocent fruit. The
watermelon deserves better. We all do.

Don't.

Haven't you done enough?

It's okay.

Mommy's not going to hurt you anymore.

You're not really going through with
this, are you?

Why would I?

You heard the laughter.

There are ways that you can be funny.
When you're nervous, when you ramble on,

when you bite your lip, or when you're
just being yourself.

And there it is.

I wondered how long you could keep that
in.

You think you're the only funny one.

Well, I can be funny too.

I never said you weren't funny. You say
it all the time.

I mean, I'm not saying it today.

You can be funny when you're not trying
to be funny. And you can be a good

boyfriend when you're not trying to ruin
my dream.

I wasn't even trying.

The watermelon's asking about you.

Why did you do it, Amanda?

The first night, the orb seemed so cold
and distant.

What if the real baby doesn't like me?

I thought it was better to let go now
than get hurt later.

It's an orb.

Of course it was cold and distant.

It even said so on the box.

Batteries not included. Maybe cold and
distant.

As long as you don't pull out its wires,
you're mother of the year.

But I did almost pull its wires out.

And I have an amazing voice.

You're supposed to love me.

The only thing you have to do to get a
real baby to love you is to love it

first. Well, feeding and diapering help
too, but usually you can get your mom to

do that part.

You really think I can do this?

You are going to be the greatest big
sister ever.

You sure are a sweet boy.

Yes, I am.

Now, let's go to the blurb and watch
Rebecca bomb.

And you know how to cheer a girl up.

Come on, R. I only said what I did
because I didn't want to see you bomb.

not going to bomb because I happen to be
funny.

Just the two I was looking for. Noah, my
mom wanted to tell you that she's

moving your desk in the hall. She said
that you and Rebecca waste too much time

making flirty eyes at each other. What?

No way.

Rebecca, mom says that you're too young
to be making flirty eyes at boys. Don't

want to get a reputation.

Well, tell your mom not to worry because
there is going to be no flirting going

on here anytime soon.

Amanda! My mom wanted to tell you that
she thinks she should dress down in

school. Dress down?

Her words, not mine.

And water.

My mom's bringing clippers. She says
that shaggy hair is a sign of a messy

That is so sweet of her. All I desire is
her help and support.

Then you'll be happy to know that she
cleaned and de -stickered your

Cleaned and de -stickered?

Does she have any idea?

What it took to get the board to look
that way? Every sticker takes me back to

time, place, or mind -blowing, heart
-pounding stunt. Your overbearing,

can't -keep -an -opinion -to -ourself
mother has got to go, Michael.

No, no, no. Not next week. Not tomorrow.

Not even in an hour.

She has to go now.

What about mothers before brothers?

That was before she broke my other rule.

hating before hating. Way worse.

Oops. I was wrong. It's the same.

So it is.

Of course, when I said your mom has to
go, I meant go and continue being the

best mother ever.

Why did you lie about Wilder's board?

I had to know what you guys really felt.
And since I won't say anything bad

about my mom, I was waiting for one of
you to break.

That, and I enjoyed the ride home.

If you want me to ask you to leave, I
will.

Get rid of her and I'll piggyback you
home every day. On one leg.

Point taken.

And I'll pass.

How do the rest of you feel?

We're going to miss her.

Check it, check it, check it, check it.

Hey, hey, wait up, wait up.

Anyway, our next performer looks ready,
and it's really not her first time,

because last night she kind of performed
when I was performing.

And now she gets her chance all by
herself.

Please welcome Rebecca Harper.

Terry D., everyone.

Thank you. Good to be here.

So why are they called drinks ice cold?

Only ice can be ice cold.

Shouldn't they say drinks are cold but
not cold enough to be a solid mass?

Um, so what's up with hamburgers?
There's no ham in them.

Well, there isn't.

Unless you make them yourself.

Ben's stick ham in there.

I'm just saying.

Ham and burgers, that is gold.

Not funny at all, but gold.

Why do they call drinks ice cold?

Only ice can be ice.

Did I say that?

Hey, where'd you get those jokes at the
bottom of Bob's purse?

No, but I wouldn't be shocked if I did.

Bob hasn't thrown anything out since
1973.

One time, I dropped her purse, and it
took me three days to clean up. I

practically drowned in sugar packets.

There are coupons for products that
don't even exist anymore, and I think I

a map for buried treasure.

She saw a butterscotch candy stuck to my
leg, and she said I was stealing it.

I don't know what hurt more, the
accusation or the candy removal.

20 -year -old butterscotch welds on
pretty good.

20 -year -old butterscotch, that does
weld on good.

So I checked her scores, and they're
through the roof.

What are you pretending to feed now,
huh? A head of lettuce? A cantaloupe?

Nope, it's a larvae.

Daddy's assistant dropped them off a
while ago.

So those scores are yours.

I didn't doubt you for a second.

You should have. And you were right. I
am a great big sister.

I'm just about to read him a story.
Which one?

The Princess and the Purse. It's about
an evil witch who puts a curse on a

beautiful princess's designer purse
collection and turns them all into

No spoilers.

I wouldn't be surprised.

Once upon a time in a magical closet far
away, the prince... Seth set off for a

day of shopping adventure.

And they all lived happily ever after.
The end.

Michael!

I've been doing some research.

And do you realize that if Noah took all
the time he spent on cracking wise and

put it into cracking books, he'd be in
his third year of college.

Mom, we need to talk.

We talk all the time, Michael.

Not like this.

I'm afraid you've threaded your last
needle.

Where have I heard that before?

It's how they tell the contestants
they've been voted off until you think

can sew.

Oh, yes.

My friends really like you at our home,
but they prefer you not to be here.

I understand.

Your friends are jealous because they
wish they could be as close to you as I

am.

Actually, they find you a little
overbearing.

That's because they're jealous that they
can't have their mothers here and you

can. Yes, Mom. They're jealous of our
relationship, of you as a mother, and

because you're the only one who knows
that they should live. And that's why

you're fired.

Not so bad.

I mean, you can still run other people's
lives.

Dad still needs to be told how to dry
places.

I have never been more proud of you.

My son can fire a person better than any
son in the world.

Say it again. You're fired.

Once more with feeling.

Get out and don't come back.

Don't let the door hit you on the way
out. One more time.

You'll never work in this town again.

Oh, my...

Good charity!

What's for dinner?

Meatloaf.

That's my little wah -wah melon.

You want to play a little game?

This little piggy went to the market.

This little piggy stayed home.

I wonder who likes this game better,
Wilder or the watermelon?

Wilder. We're the only one who finds
this adorable.

Yup. And this little piggy went wee -wee
all the way home.

See? Now that's adorable.

I never understood why kids in grade six
loved presentations, especially girls.

As soon as you say the word
presentation, girls aren't listening

They just want to find a partner across
the room and be partners.

If he allows us to be partners, we'll be
partners.

Sorry, Julie, I already found a partner.

But that's how girls are.

The three of them stand up there, too.
They just argue.

I'm not even listening to this
presentation.

Our presentation is on the giraffe.

The giraffe is... I was supposed to say
that. No, I was supposed to say that.

Sir, can we start over?

No, no, you got 7 out of 10. Sit down.
That was actually...