All language subtitles for Maverick s05e12 The Money Machine

Just as I suspected. A counterfeiting
machine.

Hey, boss, this is good stuff.

What?

Why, the dirty crook.

Hello.

What are you two footbads doing in my
room? Don't play the innocent with us,

stranger. We're on to you. Yeah, we know
what your little machine does.

Printing the bogus, eh?

Oh, I say that is rich.

You two gentlemen actually suspect me of
being a counterfeiter? Oh, come off it,

Colonel Maverick. Although I must admit
that crazy machine of yours prints some

pretty good stuff.

It should.

It is real stuff.

Maverick.

Starring Jack Kelly and James Garner.

A Warner Brothers television production.

Well, as I said, it's been five years.

She was 14.

Kind of looked like a pencil.

If you got her to talk at all, she'd
have a real Texas twang.

She checked in all right, sir, this
afternoon.

But if she's not in her room, I'm afraid
I can't help you.

I just came on duty, and I haven't seen
anyone answering the description.

Well, you'd recognize her if you saw
her.

A shrinking violet.

I'll need a room.

Would you please have a bellboy take my
bag up to the room, and if you happen to

see Miss Sutton arrive, tell her that
I'm in the salon.

Who's gonna walk me home tonight?

Home tonight.

Treat me right.

Who's gonna walk me home tonight?

There's a wonderful moon...

cautious maiden and i hate to lose my
way with the great big

man beside me i can never go astray
who's gonna

take me to my door say good night
nothing more that's why i say

what i said before

isn't too much trouble, Uncle Dimple
Dumpling. Do you mind?

Excuse me, gentlemen.

Jackie Sutton, it is you.

Of course it's me, Uncle Dimple
Dumpling. Now cut that out.

I'm not your uncle. I'm your cousin. My
name is Bart, not that Dimple Dumpling.

You didn't used to mind.

Well, that was many years ago when you
were a little girl. Of course, I must

admit you're... Yes, haven't I? I hardly
recognized you.

When I got that telegram from Pappy
telling me to meet you here, I thought

minute that he might have joined the
annual Whiskey Tasters tournament again.

Now you know different, huh? Yeah, now
I'm sure of it.

About that public singing.

If I remember your daddy right, he's
liable to larrap you pretty good for

pulling a stunt like that. Yes, Daddy
would be mad, wouldn't he? Yeah.

But it was an opportunity for me to
practice, even though I didn't get paid.

Practice? Sure.

I'm going to be a famous singer, Bart.

Like Jenny Lind.

and travel all over the world and have a
thousand, no, 5 ,000 men at my feet.

I'll raise your tit.

What? I'm sorry, that's just a reflex
action. Let's get down to business at

hand. Why did Pappy send you to meet me?
All he said in his telegram was that it

was very important.

Well, urgent family business.

And what is the urgent family business?

We'd best go to your room.

My room?

What for?

The money?

Yeah, the $10 ,000.

I can't give it to you here.

Come on.

That's why Pappy Maverick sent me here
to Kansas City.

Give me this money?

You're to take it to Denver and give it
to a Mr.

Cannonball Clyde Bassett.

Your pappy owes him the money, and
Bassett says if he doesn't get the money

pronto, he's going to go to Texas and
blow Uncle Beauregard's head off.

Now, pappy's all hard.

He never could refuse a request, if it
was put to him the right way.

But who is this cannonball -hooked Clyde
Bassett fellow?

Why do I have to bring the money to him?

Why didn't the old boy just send him a
draft or telegraph it?

Well, Cannonball doesn't have a
permanent address in Denver. Uncle

said he's the sort who had to change
addresses frequently.

He sounds like a solid citizen.

How do I find him?

Well, you're to stay at the Denver house
and hang around the lobby wearing a

white carnation in your lapel so
Cannonball can identify you.

Well, if Abby's in trouble, I guess I
better do it.

There's one thing we Mavericks have in
common. It's a family stick

Besides, I was on my way to Denver
anyway.

Well, Jackie, that's over and I haven't
had supper yet. Would you care to join

me?

Jackie, I can't wait all night for you
to finish this, so I'm going to head

the street and try to find me a poker
game.

Hey, what time are we leaving for
Denver?

Well, the train leaves at 8 o 'clock in
the morning.

We?

Sure.

I'm going with you.

Oh, no, you're not.

Now, young lady, you're going back to
Texas.

I am not.

I'm 19 and I can do as I please.

If you won't let me go with you, I'll go
alone.

But I... Why on earth do you want to go
to Denver?

I told you.

I want to be a singer or an actress. I
can't stay in Kansas City and become

Jackie, you got some talent. I heard you
sing. But you're just too young to go

traipsing off on your own.

Besides, an actress needs a lot of
experience, which you haven't got.

And very important, an expensive
wardrobe. A lot of fancy dresses, which

also haven't got.

After pointing these things out to you,
I'm sure you'll head back to Texas,

won't you?

No.

Now, you sleep on it. We'll talk about
it in the morning.

And did you say you were going to play
poker?

Well, a man's got to make a living
somehow.

Well, then there's the answer.

What answer?

For my getting all those fancy clothes
to become an actress.

You can win the money to buy them with.

Young lady, if you think for one minute
that I'm going to use my poker wings to

stake you to close, you better think
again.

All right, I will.

You can use that $10 ,000 your pappy
sent you as a stake.

But I can't use that.

Pappy's sending me that money with the
complete trust and faith and

understanding that a man can only have
for his kin.

That reminds me. He told me to be sure
and get a signed receipt from you for

$10 ,000.

Please, sir, may I have my key? Miss
Sutton, room 202.

Your Miss Sutton?

What's the matter? Is my slip showing?

No, but Mr. Mavericks is.

Oh, yes, your key.

Five is the point. Hit the rail, please.

Seven, a loser.

Next shooter, please.

Chips, please.

$100 ones.

Here you are, miss. You also win the
dice.

Now, come on, Bones. Talk for mama.

Eight are from Decatur.

Eight is the point.

You seem to be familiar with this game.

Why, this game is meat and taters. A
nice old gentleman taught me to play.

Maverick from Texas.

Beauregard Maverick, he educated you?

Yeah. That's all, folks. Take your
money, miss. The game is all over. No

action tonight.

Hey, what's the big sad idea?

Look, I once had a gaming house in
Texas.

Beauregard Maverick rolled so many
passes, I wound up working for him. And

don't hanker to have any trouble with
this protege. The game is over.

I've got to admit, Conway, it's as good
as any made by Uncle Sam.

Like I said, gents, the machine makes
perfect money.

Secret process.

Yeah.

And that's what bothers me.

You've got a gadget here that turns out
foolproof money. How come you're willing

to sell it?

You gents are too smart for me.

But it's a logical question.

Before you, a broken man.

For years, I lived in a cold, damp
attic, obsessed with one thought, to

my money machine.

And then, when success was in my grasp,
my doctor told me that I had

only...

Life has its tribulations,

Mr. Murphy.

How long did your doctor... I have six
weeks, at the most.

So you see, gentlemen, money means very
little to me.

All I want is enough to take me back to
the home of my sainted mother.

My machine.

All those years.

I do not want that toil to have been in
vain.

Oh, rest assured, sir. Your machine will
be in responsible hands.

How much did you say you wanted for it?
Who can put a price on a machine that

can bring you untold wealth?

Of course, I could give it to you.

However, if I did that, I don't think
that you would fully appreciate it.

I think that some token payment, say $10
,000 apiece, I would use the money to

comfort my elderly mother in her
declining years.

Why not use the machine to make some
money for you? Mr.

Smythe, I'm surprised at you.

Even though the money is perfect, it
would be tainted.

Would you ask a son to give his poor
aged mother tainted money?

How could you suggest such a thing?
Well, I just didn't think.

I'm sorry, Mr. Murphy.

So you see, gentlemen, time is of the
essence to me.

If you have the money, I can begin my
journey.

It would be some solid to me in my final
days to know that two other persons

have shared in the fruits of my genius.

I'm buying it. Now, see here, young
lady, whoever you are, you can't come

barging in on a private deal like this.
Now, gentlemen, I saw the machine work.

It'll make plenty for all of us. And
you'd better let me in or I'll get the

sheriff. Besides, I have $10 ,000 right
here for my interest.

Well, gentlemen, it looks like the young
lady has us over a barrel.

Shall we get on to business?

Hey, I thought I told you to go to bed.
Now, you hush, Uncle Gimp. I mean, Bart.

You're going to be so proud of me.

That sounds like you decided to take my
advice and go back to Texas.

No, but now I'll have the money to buy
all the dresses and costumes I'll need

become a famous actress.

And when did you get it?

Well, I haven't really gotten it yet.

But they're making it now.

Who's making what?

My partners. The ones I'm in business
with.

We bought a machine for making money.

Jackie.

You bought a machine for making money
from whom?

Oh, from a poor sick man named Murphy.
He wanted the money so he could spend

last days with his old mother.

He's already gone.

I'm sure he has.

Just how much money did you pick?

Just where did you get it?

Oh, well, you weren't here and... Happy
$10 ,000?

Uh, yes, but it's all right. I can pay
it right back as soon as my two partners

crank out enough money out of the
machine.

Like I said... They're doing it now.

It isn't like I'd done something wrong.

Wrong? You got taken in by an old con
game, that's all.

The machine is a fake.

Oh, you're wrong, Bart.

I saw the machine make money. Sure you
did, but they set it up in advance.

They fill it with three or four real
bills, but the machine doesn't print.

You'll see, and you'll be sorry.

I already am.

They're my two partners now.

I'll bet they're just loaded with money.

You take the south end of the street,
Hal.

Six weeks to live, my foot. He won't
have one minute to live when I get my

on that crook. $10 ,000 for a roll of
wrapping paper.

I take it those were your two partners.

Busy making money?

I guess I fell for something, huh?

Correct.

Maybe we could have the sheriff arrest
him.

Well, that's just great.

Then you tell the sheriff you bought a
printing machine for the purpose of

making counterfeit money.

I guess I am pretty dumb, huh?

Yeah. Well, Bart, you were right.

I'm going to go unpack and head back for
Texas.

You will not.

You're going to stick close to me.
You're the only one who can put the

this Murphy fellow.

Could you tell us if a man has bought a
ticket here recently?

Why, no.

This is a charitable institution. I
mean, somebody in particular.

Would you tell them what Murphy looks
like?

Well, there wasn't much made him stand
out except he was big and had a small

mustache. Well, there were two men took
the train to Denver, a big guy and a

little one. And the big one did have a
mustache.

The night train just pulled out five
minutes ago.

Did you say night train? Yeah, went into
service last week.

If I'd known that, I could have saved
myself $10 ,000.

So Murphy's gone to Denver.

Yeah. Thank you very much.

For the next week or so, you're going to
do exactly as I tell you. Yes, Uncle

Dimple. Now cut that out.

When we get to Denver, you're going to
call me Colonel Maverick, and don't you

forget it. You must have something in
mind.

Yeah, I do. According to Pappy, the
easiest man to con is a con man.

Well, he should know.

Yeah, well, I'm going to test his
theory. It should take a couple of days,

that's where you come in. You'll keep
Cannonball Clyde Bassett in check.

Can't have him going off to Texas to
perforate Pappy.

But what do we use for money to get to
Denver?

I'll take care of that.

Now, don't get any ideas. It's the last
one I have.

And you stay right here.

Do you see him in here?

No, not here.

You keep your eyes peeled. But if you do
spot him, make sure he doesn't see you.

Colonel Maverick and niece, welcome to
the Denver house.

Thank you. Boy, rooms 39 and 40 for the
colonel and the young lady.

You know, this Denver house is a pretty
posh place, boss.

The picking should be easy.

It's loaded with well -heeled suckers,
Louie.

I'll spend the next few days getting
cozy with a few of them while you build

another money machine.

And don't be in a rush about it.

Might as well enjoy the place for a few
days before we make our move.

This will be your room, Colonel
Maverick, and your niece will be just

hall. Fine, thank you.

Jackie, what are you doing?

What is it?

It was him, Bart.

Big Ed Murphy.

Murphy?

We're lucky. I don't think he spotted
you. What do you plan to do now?

You're going to be busy keeping
Cannonball Clyde Bassett out of my hair.

you do exactly as I've told you.

Son. Oh, yes, sir. How would you like to
earn 50 easy dollars?

You just bought yourself a bow, boy,
sir. That's good. First, you take Miss

Sutton's bag to her room. Then have 200
white carnations sent up here to me.

Did you say 200?

You think that's odd? Well, you go to
the hardware store with me.

Hardware store.

Boy, do you want that $50, or would you
like to stand there and just listen to

me talk?

A 50.

Good. Run the errand and meet me back
here. Yes, sir.

Now we know where Big Ed Murphy is and
what he looks like. I wish I could say

the same about Cannonball Clyde Bassett.
For all I know, he may be on his way to

Texas. Won't matter.

Pappy should be well on his way by now.

How do you figure?

Pappy thinks that I paid that money to
Cannonball by this time.

No, he doesn't. I sent him a telegram
from Kansas City and told him that the

money had been lost.

Jackie, do you mean to tell me you had
the gumption to tell Pappy how foolish

you were?

Well, I, um, didn't exactly admit to
being foolish.

How's that again?

Well, I... I signed your name to the
wire.

Mr. Cannonball Bassett, you have the 10
,000, yes?

No, I told you.

The messenger's bringing it in from
Texas.

This messenger, who is he?

I don't know and I don't care, as long
as he's got the folding stuff.

If you do not know him and he does not
know you, then how will you know he's

messenger? He'll be wearing a white
coat.

Never mind, that's my business.

And my business is with you.

I cannot wait much longer, monsieur.

Two or three days at the most.

Don't worry, you'll get your money.

That's fine.

When you get this order filled, would
you give it to the boy here?

That'll take care of it.

I want this stuff delivered to my room
tonight. One piece at a time, about 15,

20 minutes apart. You got that?

I know what you want, but I sure don't
get it.

I'll see you later.

Good evening. Good evening.

Could you please give me $200 in 20s?

Nice, crisp new ones.

Certainly, sir.

By the way, Colonel Maverick, there's a
telegram here for you.

Oh, fine. Thank you.

You shouldn't be here. Big Ed's liable
to see you. It's all right. Murphy's

the street in a saloon.

What's in the telegram, huh?

How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is
to have a thankless child.

Is that all he said?

Oh, no. He added much more.

You are an unmitigated birdbrain.

Your stupidity has forced me to flee for
my life.

Signed, Pappy.

He sent it from Arkansas.

You see what you've done by foisting all
the blame on me?

Well, it was your fault.

My fault?

Sure. If you hadn't been so careless
with the money, I couldn't have borrowed

from you.

Oh, Jackie, you just don't understand.

Oh, incidentally, did the bellboy take
care of those carnations? He sure did.

200 white ones. I'm all set to go to
work in the morning. Well, you better

fail me this time, because if you do,
those carnations are liable to be

displayed at my funeral.

Me?

You.

Fine, I see.

Duck soup, boss.

Well, I've been doing well, too.

The suckers are falling all over
themselves to buy in, but I'm going to

them dangling a while longer.

There he goes again.

What?

That fellow across the hall.

Every few minutes he gets a delivery of
some sort.

I didn't notice it at first, but then it
began to get on my nerves.

I wonder what he's up to.

Well, that's fine.

That couldn't be better.

Colonel Maverick, sir, what in the world
are you working on in there? I've made

about a dozen deliveries now, and you...
Shh, shh, shh.

Can you keep a secret?

Yes.

Good. So can I.

What

are

you going to do with all that stuff?

I am making a trap.

And I think the rat in the room across
the hall is already smelling the cheese.

Now, listen, you go to your room and get
some sleep. I have a lot of work to do,

child.

How come you're always calling me child?

Because if I don't keep reminding
myself, I'm liable to forget you are

Now, you be careful on the way to your
room. I don't want Murphy to see you.

Oh, that's fine, son.

That ought to just about do it.

Tommy, boss, what do you suppose he's up
to?

I don't know, Louie.

I don't know.

I almost forgot.

It just came in for you. From Indiana.

Indiana. Thank you very much.

From Uncle Beauregard?

I suppose.

Traveling fast.

Imagine losing $10 ,000.

You miserable butterfingers.

That's all it says?

Isn't that enough?

Go to your room. I'll see you in the
morning.

All night long it goes on. What is that
madman up to?

Oh, thank you for your kindness, sir.

Get your pretty carnations, folks. Come
on, from a poor little girl.

How are things going?

I've sold 40 already.

That's fine. That ought to keep
Cannonball Clyde confused.

I'm going up to take a nap. I've been
awake all night.

Get your pretty carnations, folks. Real
cheap.

From a poor little girl.

Thank you.

You have the 10 ,000, yes?

Yes. I mean, no.

You'd better get the money soon or the
deal is off. Look, I've got to have

another day or two.

That messenger from Texas should be...

Now the money's here, I can pay you.

That's good, I shall wait.

Okay, baby, let's have the ten thou.

I beg your pardon.

Come off it, sister.

Let's have the cabbage, you know, the
kale.

Cabbage? Kale?

Are you mad?

You're not going to take any chances,
eh? Okay, I'll identify myself.

They call me the Cannon Boy. Basically,
heavens.

Well, ain't you from Texas?

Texas? I, my good man, am from Boston.

Well, you're wearing a carnation, a
white carnation.

Well, I must say, you certainly express
your love for flowers in a very peculiar

manner.

So this is where they're coming from.

Oh, kind sir, would you please buy a
flower from a starving girl?

Yeah, yeah.

Take it easy, boss.

Did you pipe that, boss?

That money, you don't suppose it's...
Sure, bears looking into it.

But let's do it tomorrow morning.

I need some sleep.

Yes, sir. Just one thing. Who's the
madman you got stashed in the room

from mine, noon 39?

The madman, sir?

Oh, there must be some mistake.

That room is occupied by a most
distinguished gentleman, Colonel

Maverick. He's from Washington, D .C.

Huh?

Oh, Colonel.

Yes. That gentleman just going through
the door, Mr. Murphy, he was inquiring

about you.

Nothing unpleasant, I hope.

Well, he did say something about a
madman.

Poor chap, I hear him thrashing around
all night.

I'm afraid he can't sleep.

May I have my key, please?

Get that nose day out of here!

That's a fearful -looking thing.

What do you suppose it does?

I think I know.

Louis? Go over there and start turning
that crank.

Who, me, boss?

Yes, you.

Uh -huh.

Just as I suspected, a counterfeiting
machine.

Hey, boss, this is good stuff.

What?

Why, the dirty crook.

Yeah, you've got to give him credit,
though.

He's got a real machine here, ours is
only a fake.

Hey, let's steal it.

What are you two footpads doing in my
room? Don't play the innocent with us,

stranger. We're on to you. Yeah, we know
what your little machine does.

Printing the bogus, eh?

Oh, I say that is rich.

You two gentlemen actually suspect me of
being a counterfeiter? Oh, come off it,

Colonel Maverick. Although I must admit
that crazy machine of yours prints some

pretty good stuff.

It should.

It is real stuff.

Perhaps this will clarify the situation.

What's it say, boss?

Says that Colonel Maverick is an
official representative of the United

Treasury Department.

That should clear up a few things.

And you, too, are to be commended.

We are?

Of course.

You've proven yourselves to be alert and
diligent citizens.

Oh, yeah?

Looking back, my actions would appear to
be a bit suspicious.

And you acted bravely in following
through on those suspicions.

I believe I owe you an explanation.

But you must keep this in the strictest
confidence.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, mum's the word.

Good.

The United States Treasury Department,
gentlemen, has elected to build a new

mint up here in Denver.

Because of the altitude and the dry air
and the effluvia... The whovia? The

effluvia from the atmosphere.

The normal printing presses, such as the
ones we use in the Washington Mint,

will not operate satisfactorily.

So I was sent ahead to build a small
pilot model of a press that would

these technical deficiencies.

Oh, I see. And so you built this here
little gadget.

Right.

And I must say, gentlemen, that it works
to perfection.

Naturally, it's just a small test
machine to be used temporarily until

as larger presses can be built.

Naturally.

Immodest of me, perhaps, but I am rather
proud of my efforts.

You see, the status hand here turns the
brookerscope.

which in turn actuates the capital
armor, so that when you turn the crank,

paper goes through the regacycle and the
stuffer.

Well, gentlemen, as you can see, the
simplicity of the design of this machine

self -evident.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

The thought of dismantling it tonight is
most discouraging.

Dismantling?

Oh, yes.

Now that the machine is working so
perfectly, I'll have to go back to

to make my report. I can't very well
leave an official government money press

here unguarded, can I?

I'll be gone at least a month.

Well, as a matter of fact, Colonel
Maverick, my partner and I are here for

unlimited stay. We'd be more than happy
to guard the machine in your absence.

That's very generous of you, but I'm
afraid I just could not do that. It'd be

too much trouble for you, what with
official requirements and all that. What

kind of requirements?

Well, the usual silly red tape.

Well, I'd need a photograph of you to
affix to a form authorizing you to be a

custodian for government equipment.

Photograph? Well, that's all? Well,
that's very simple. I have a photograph

my room across the hall. Well, of
course, then there's a necessary bond to

good faith, you know. A bond how much?

About $12 ,000, but it's just too big an
imposition. And besides, you would have

to be so careful of the key to this
room.

So you see, gentlemen, it's just a
little too much to ask.

So if you'll excuse me, I'll begin work
tearing down the machine for craving.

Now, now, now, wait a minute.

Colonel Maverick, let's not be too hasty
about this. You know, after all, as

public -spirited citizens, I think that
we could work something out.

Beautiful.

And they fell for it?

Hook, line, and sinker.

For $12 ,000?

Yep. Gee, that means you can pay off
Cannonball, and we'll have $1 ,000

apiece. Well, there you go with that we
stuff again.

All right, I guess you earned it with
that carnation -selling bit, but I'm not

going to give you your share till you're
on that train for Texas.

But, Bart, I want to stay here and
become an actress.

No chance, young lady. You're off to
Texas.

Besides, $1 ,000 wouldn't be enough to
even get you started.

All right, you win.

That's good, girl. You go up to your
room because if Murphy spotted you now,

it'd ruin everything.

I have to find a printer to do a job for
me before tomorrow.

What on earth for?

For Mr.

Murphy's credentials.

You have the 10 ,000, monsieur?

You've got to give me another day.

I'm sorry, monsieur, but I can't stay
here no longer.

What? It is regrettable, but I must
leave.

I get hold of that pappy Maverick.
Colonel Maverick, please. Telegram for

Colonel Maverick.

Did you say Maverick? Will you please
put me down, sir?

Yes, I said Maverick.

Colonel Maverick.

That's him coming down the stairs now.

So you're another Maverick. Now take it
easy, friend. I'm here to deliver the

money you're waiting for.

I'll be... Come on, let's have it. There
you are.

I've never been so glad to see anyone in
all my life.

This money lets me into the biggest deal
I've ever had. Come here.

Here. Are we in business?

We are.

Professor Renard, I want you to meet Mr.
Maverick.

How do you do, Professor?

You know, Maverick, I feel so good about
this, I'm going to ask the professor to

let you in on the little deal, too. I
have no objections, monsieur, provided,

course, you have some money. Hold it,
boys. What deal are you so willing to

allow me to enter?

You see this little box of the
professor's?

Yeah.

Well, you wouldn't believe it, Maverick,
but this is the machine for making

diamonds.

Diamonds? Yeah.

Fast as you can turn the crank.

Bart!

A machine for making diamonds.

We have $2 ,000.

Let's buy in.

Gentlemen, I'm afraid your proposition
doesn't interest me.

All right, but don't say I didn't give
you the chance.

Oh, no, I won't say that.

For heaven's sake, won't you ever learn?

A money -making machine is bad enough,
but when you want to fall for one that

makes diamonds... If it's a con game,
how come you didn't warn Cannonball?

Because he's a big boy.

He can take care of himself.

You could at least have looked at the
machine.

I don't have to look at a thing like
that to know it's phony. Besides, I've

other things to worry about.

That's right.

What if Big Ed Murphy finds out your
machine is a phony? I'm not worried

him. He won't dare try to operate that
till we're safely out of town.

This is a half hour before train time.

You keep an eye on my bag. I'll be back
in a few minutes.

I still think we ought to check in on
that diamond machine. You stop thinking

and stay right here.

All right.

All right.

Oh, Carl.

This just came in for you, sir. It's
from New York. Thank you.

What's it say? Is it from Pappy?

Yeah, it's from Pappy.

Just got word of a hot poker game in
Shanghai.

On my way, bon voyage.

Glad you brought it to my attention,
Colonel Maverick.

I'll keep a close eye on things while
you're gone. Good.

Government matters always receive my
undivided attention.

I'll be sure to include that in my
report to Washington, Marshal.

Incidentally, I'd suggest you go up and
get acquainted with Mr. Murphy right

away. I'll do that. Thanks.

Don't mention it.

That niece of yours, she asked me to
give you this.

Thank you.

I took the $2 ,000 and invested in
Professor Renard's diamond machine.

By the time you get this, I'll be on my
way to California.

Love, Jackie.

P .S. Don't be mad.

Look in the package.

There are Professor Renard's first
samples.

Are you all right, Colonel?

I've been taken again.

I'm cleaned. I don't even have enough
money to tip you.

Good thing I've already paid for those
train tickets.

Oh, that's quite all right, sir. Miss
Sutton took care of me most handsomely.

I just bet she did with my money.

Oh, you'd better hurry up, Colonel. Your
train will be leaving any minute now.

Yeah.

Thank you.

There he goes, boss.

He just has time to make his train. Come
on.

To the machine.

For a whole month.

Hold it, Lily.

Good morning, gentlemen.

I'm Marshal Hodgkins.

Colonel Maverick told me of his trip to
Washington and how you two are to be

custodians of the printing machine
during his absence.

Yes, well, I'm glad to hear that Colonel
Maverick is that thorough. Pleased to

make your acquaintance, Marshal.

Louis Sletimer.

You think this machine turns out real
government currency.

Amazing. How does it work?

Well, as Colonel Maverick explained it
to us, the statistan...

here, turns the brupiscope, here, which
in turn activates the capital armor.

There, you see?

So that when you turn the crank, here,
the paper goes through the regocycle and

the stertner.

I think.

Here, I'll show you. Just watch right
there, Marshal, and you will see a crisp

new $20 bill being made.

I'm watching.

I guess the brookoscope must need
oiling.

Boss, we've been had.

Pardon

me,

sir. Is this seat occupied?

No.

Take it and be welcome.

Thank you. Excuse me, please.

Thank you.

Pardon.

Is something wrong?

Oh, no, no, nothing, except that I've
just experienced the most thorough

cleaning since Hercules tackled the
Aegean stables.

Cleaning? Oh, of course, yes. It's the
expression used in the game of poker,

right?

You, uh, familiar with the game of
poker, sir?

Yeah, I find it the most delightful way
to pass the time.

You mean hair?

Oh, I feel about it exactly the way you
do. But unfortunately, at the moment,

I'm temporarily short of funds.

Oh, well, too bad.

Well, however, I just paid $2 ,000 for
these.

Oh, may I?

Oh, please.

Magnificent color.

That's what I thought.

You would be willing to sell them?

Well, under the circumstances, would you
say $500?

A diamond, mean hair, is nature's great
wonder.

Formed under untold heat and pressure.

The hardest material known to man.

$500. And those are yours.

You, uh...

You seem to know quite a bit about
diamonds.

Why not?

I'm Klaus Jungblut from Amsterdam.

Diamonds is my business.

Then you probably know how to tell
whether they're genuine.

There is one very simple test.

Watch it.

No, no, no, that's all right. No, no,
sir, that's fine.

You see?

He bought them this mustache. They were
real.

Smooth as a handle on a gun.

Maverick is the name.

Wild as a wind in Oregon.

Blowing up a canyon, easier to tame.

Riverboat, ring your bell.

Fare thee well, Annabelle.

Luck is a lady that he loves the best.

Nice to New Orleans,

living on Jackson Queens.

Maverick is a legend of the West.

Riverboat, ring your bell.

Maverick is a legend of the West.

Maverick is a legend of the West.