All language subtitles for Love And War s02e01 Just in Time

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:07,230 I was a man about town. 2 00:00:09,130 --> 00:00:13,530 I was the kind of guy who got around. 3 00:00:14,810 --> 00:00:21,070 But since you're gone, you see, the city dances without me. 4 00:00:26,310 --> 00:00:29,790 Wait, where's my lunch? I'm in a hurry. I'll be right back. 5 00:00:31,630 --> 00:00:34,630 I ordered pasta primavera. This is a ham sandwich. 6 00:00:34,910 --> 00:00:36,310 Don't be afraid to experiment. 7 00:00:37,270 --> 00:00:38,270 No, 8 00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:40,750 I'm sorry. Oh, please, everybody. 9 00:00:41,010 --> 00:00:43,370 If you could just be patient a little while longer. 10 00:00:43,650 --> 00:00:47,770 We lost our chef unexpectedly this morning, and the new person is just 11 00:00:47,770 --> 00:00:49,270 get used to the surroundings. Thank you. 12 00:00:49,530 --> 00:00:55,770 Oh, my God. We are on a great big jumbo jet with two engines on fire, and I'm 13 00:00:55,770 --> 00:00:58,430 the stewardess going up and down the aisles offering people extra peanuts. 14 00:01:00,020 --> 00:01:03,960 Table six says there's too much mustard on this ham. Oh, I can't believe she 15 00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:07,100 deserted us. I worked on an assembly line in Detroit for seven years, and I 16 00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:08,300 never felt this kind of desperation. 17 00:01:09,660 --> 00:01:12,900 Except the time when I saw that first Timothy Lowry roll off the assembly 18 00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:15,580 I knew we were all doomed. Yeah, just give me that. Give me that. 19 00:01:16,420 --> 00:01:23,200 I can't believe Wally would just leave town 20 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:24,200 like this. 21 00:01:24,320 --> 00:01:26,280 Just since I heard him, I keep thinking about Jack. 22 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:27,760 He must be a complete wreck. 23 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:31,540 Come on, Ray. The Jack Stein I know is a tough guy who's going to bounce right 24 00:01:31,540 --> 00:01:35,600 back. Like that time he left his new laptop on the subway and he was 25 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,100 But then we went to see Spaceballs and after that he was fine. 26 00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,060 Let's see if there are any funny movies in here. 27 00:01:42,960 --> 00:01:43,759 Heads up. 28 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:44,760 Heads up. 29 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,420 Hi, guys. How's it going? 30 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:55,040 Fine. Good. 31 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:58,220 How's it going with you? With me? It's going great. 32 00:01:58,540 --> 00:01:59,479 See that? 33 00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:00,780 Man said it's going great. 34 00:02:01,060 --> 00:02:03,240 I just finished tomorrow's column. 35 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,480 I whipped through it like a man possessed. 36 00:02:06,780 --> 00:02:08,180 It's about the year of the woman. 37 00:02:08,539 --> 00:02:09,539 Oh, yeah. 38 00:02:11,300 --> 00:02:14,080 It's been terrific, hasn't it? Look at all we got out of it. 39 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:16,220 Tampax machine in the Senate bathroom. 40 00:02:17,540 --> 00:02:18,540 That's good, huh? 41 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,280 A female serial killer. 42 00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:23,880 I guess she felt that she was empowered to do away with all those people. 43 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:27,020 That's something else we got out of this year, the word empowered. 44 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:31,500 All the women are saying it now, you know, and the sentence is like, oh, I'm 45 00:02:31,500 --> 00:02:35,660 sorry, Jack, I can't marry you, but I suddenly feel empowered to go find 46 00:02:35,660 --> 00:02:39,820 in Paris and leave you to turn into a drooling old man sitting on a park bench 47 00:02:39,820 --> 00:02:41,980 with a pigeon on your head, you miserable loser. 48 00:02:42,460 --> 00:02:44,540 How do you get this off? I can't get this off. 49 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,620 Take it easy. Take it easy. Just get it off. Take it easy, buddy. 50 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:50,320 What the hell are these anyway? 51 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,400 I don't know, Talbot. The science editor gave them to me. 52 00:02:53,950 --> 00:02:56,510 He said they haven't been approved yet in Mexico, so I thought they'd do the 53 00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:57,510 trick. 54 00:02:59,790 --> 00:03:00,790 Oh, God. 55 00:03:00,910 --> 00:03:03,810 I can't believe that she left me. 56 00:03:05,110 --> 00:03:06,690 Why would she do something like that? 57 00:03:07,630 --> 00:03:09,830 Maybe she had mileage that was about to expire. 58 00:03:12,910 --> 00:03:13,910 You know what she did? 59 00:03:15,590 --> 00:03:16,710 She left me a letter. 60 00:03:17,570 --> 00:03:18,750 I've read it a million times. 61 00:03:19,670 --> 00:03:23,240 Dear Jack, I don't know where to start, so I'll just start by saying that I love 62 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:28,020 you very, very much, which is why I have to leave you. Oh, Wally, such a good 63 00:03:28,020 --> 00:03:31,180 person. But some of her marbles rolled out of the bag. 64 00:03:32,220 --> 00:03:35,620 I met you on the day of my divorce, and now you've asked me to marry you. As 65 00:03:35,620 --> 00:03:38,920 much as my heart wants to say yes, it would be wrong to make that kind of 66 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,760 commitment when I don't know who I am yet. 67 00:03:41,140 --> 00:03:44,400 What does she mean she doesn't know who she is yet? It says who she is right in 68 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:45,400 her driver's license. 69 00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:49,000 And what's with going to France? They can't even keep a Disneyland going. 70 00:03:51,370 --> 00:03:52,370 not a place to settle. 71 00:03:52,550 --> 00:03:55,530 I can't take it. I can't take it. My life is ruined. 72 00:03:55,790 --> 00:03:58,390 Can you believe it? Wally left me a lousy letter. 73 00:03:58,670 --> 00:04:00,290 Oh, good. It's a form letter now. 74 00:04:01,210 --> 00:04:05,550 Dear Abe, the blue shamrock is now yours. I bought it from your brother, so 75 00:04:05,550 --> 00:04:09,570 giving it to you seems like the right way to close a circle. P .S., sorry 76 00:04:09,570 --> 00:04:10,570 all the debt. 77 00:04:10,590 --> 00:04:11,950 This is a nightmare. 78 00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:14,730 No, no, no, no, no. It's worse than a nightmare. 79 00:04:15,510 --> 00:04:20,470 All of a sudden, I'm... I'm... management. 80 00:04:25,870 --> 00:04:27,030 You're one of them now, Abe. 81 00:04:27,690 --> 00:04:29,410 It's going to change you, man. I know. 82 00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:33,590 I'm trying to fight it, but... I hate Clinton. 83 00:04:35,110 --> 00:04:36,870 Tax and spin, tax and spin. 84 00:04:37,230 --> 00:04:38,690 I like that nice bardo. 85 00:04:39,770 --> 00:04:41,390 Why doesn't anybody ever listen to him? 86 00:04:43,010 --> 00:04:46,670 Jack, I know you feel horrible right now, but good friends can help you 87 00:04:46,670 --> 00:04:50,130 this. If you don't want to be alone this weekend, you can come with me to visit 88 00:04:50,130 --> 00:04:51,130 Charles in prison. 89 00:04:51,250 --> 00:04:54,970 The strip search can be a little unpleasant, but it gets easier each 90 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:59,340 Last week, the matron noticed a mole I needed to have looked at. 91 00:05:00,520 --> 00:05:04,240 Look, look, guys, I really appreciate your sympathy, but there's nothing you 92 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:05,780 do that's going to make this pain go away. 93 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:09,140 I'm going to have to go through this my own way, alone. 94 00:05:45,770 --> 00:05:47,670 she dumped you. What is it, on the news now? 95 00:05:47,970 --> 00:05:49,850 No. I drove her to the airport. 96 00:05:53,110 --> 00:05:57,550 Look, Pally, you and I have had our differences in the past, but now we have 97 00:05:57,550 --> 00:06:02,450 bond. We have both loved and been left by the same woman. May I remind you, 98 00:06:02,450 --> 00:06:06,230 that Wally didn't leave you. She caught you in bed with another woman. 99 00:06:06,630 --> 00:06:08,510 Yeah, but very soon after that, she left. 100 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:13,430 Let me tell you something, Kip. Unlike you, I have learned my lesson. 101 00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:16,590 I was in love for the first time in my life, and I got the shaft. 102 00:06:17,130 --> 00:06:18,490 Well, never again. 103 00:06:18,730 --> 00:06:21,010 As far as I'm concerned, women are nothing but trouble. 104 00:06:24,270 --> 00:06:29,070 Oh! Hey, what are you doing? I'm walking. I was walking there. Well, 105 00:06:29,090 --> 00:06:31,410 Your Royal Highness. Ladies first, as usual. 106 00:06:31,810 --> 00:06:33,090 Eat dirt. You wish. 107 00:06:33,970 --> 00:06:35,230 That makes no sense. 108 00:06:35,590 --> 00:06:38,090 I say eat dirt, you say you wish. 109 00:06:38,550 --> 00:06:39,710 How does that follow? 110 00:06:40,670 --> 00:06:41,670 Maybe it doesn't. 111 00:06:41,970 --> 00:06:43,170 Maybe I didn't want it to. 112 00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:47,680 Typical man answer. Typical woman attitude. 113 00:07:17,930 --> 00:07:20,410 I appreciate my salary later. Where's the kitchen? I'm ready to start. 114 00:07:20,790 --> 00:07:22,010 How'd you know we needed a chef? 115 00:07:22,370 --> 00:07:25,650 Well, your produce guy told the salad guy at Lutess who told the sauce guy at 116 00:07:25,650 --> 00:07:28,190 the Four Seasons who told me the sous chef at Le Petit Bateau. 117 00:07:28,850 --> 00:07:30,410 Actually, the former sous chef. 118 00:07:30,690 --> 00:07:33,990 Aren't we wasting a lot of time talking? Your customers are on the school lunch 119 00:07:33,990 --> 00:07:35,490 program here, for God's sake. 120 00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:41,150 Oh, how do I know you're really a chef? 121 00:07:42,450 --> 00:07:45,470 My God, we're really starting from scratch here, aren't we? 122 00:07:47,689 --> 00:07:51,890 Palladino, daughter of the famous modern artist Dante Palladino, trained in the 123 00:07:51,890 --> 00:07:55,470 great kitchens of Europe, personal chef to Mick Jagger during the Steel Wheels 124 00:07:55,470 --> 00:07:59,550 tour, a year and a half cooking on the Alaska Pipeline just to learn about 125 00:07:59,550 --> 00:08:04,410 salmon, rising star in one of New York's most important restaurants. I'm the 126 00:08:04,410 --> 00:08:07,890 luckiest thing that's happened to you in a long time, so come on, let's go. It's 127 00:08:07,890 --> 00:08:08,849 time to cook. 128 00:08:08,850 --> 00:08:10,670 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. 129 00:08:11,830 --> 00:08:14,350 If you're such hot stuff, why are you looking for a job? 130 00:08:15,570 --> 00:08:16,570 Good question. 131 00:08:17,450 --> 00:08:23,230 You see, a man made a huge mistake and passed me over for the executive chef 132 00:08:23,230 --> 00:08:26,010 spot when I was clearly the obvious choice. 133 00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:30,010 This ham is wet. I won't even ask. 134 00:08:30,610 --> 00:08:33,370 Anyway, words were exchanged. 135 00:08:33,610 --> 00:08:35,169 Some food became airborne. 136 00:08:35,570 --> 00:08:40,270 This happens to be the most incredible raspberry souffle you will ever taste in 137 00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:44,830 your life. And this big oinker tells me that I will never work in this town 138 00:08:44,830 --> 00:08:46,990 again. All because a woman. 139 00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:51,520 tried to bust one of the great bastions of male chauvinism, the French kitchen. 140 00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:53,020 Oh, here we go. 141 00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:59,040 It's the all -I -can't -get -ahead -because -I'm -a -woman excuse. 142 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:03,260 Did it ever occur to you that maybe you didn't get to be executive chef because 143 00:09:03,260 --> 00:09:04,580 the man was more qualified? 144 00:09:04,940 --> 00:09:09,340 That maybe the man had a better sense of responsibility and that the man could 145 00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:10,740 be counted on to stick around? 146 00:09:11,130 --> 00:09:15,570 and not take off and leave people with nothing more than a few feeble words 147 00:09:15,570 --> 00:09:19,130 scribbled onto a disgusting piece of cheap stationery. 148 00:09:19,790 --> 00:09:23,830 Um, you'll have to excuse him. The chef here was Jack's girlfriend, and last 149 00:09:23,830 --> 00:09:25,330 night she up and went to Paris. 150 00:09:25,890 --> 00:09:26,890 Really? 151 00:09:27,130 --> 00:09:29,490 Usually they just move to the other side of town. 152 00:09:31,190 --> 00:09:32,830 All the way to France, huh? 153 00:09:33,350 --> 00:09:35,430 You must be a real catch. 154 00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:44,000 You have a little piece of raw meat in your hair. 155 00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:47,080 It looks somehow right. 156 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:56,940 Okay, who's in charge here? Oh, no, you again. Can it get any worse? 157 00:09:57,200 --> 00:09:59,900 You've got to stand in this port order. The guy who shucks clams at the oyster 158 00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,940 bar told me she's split to France. La la. 159 00:10:02,620 --> 00:10:04,700 So, uh, who's going to take these duties? 160 00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:08,760 I will. All right, I'm out of here. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Just a minute. You 161 00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:10,460 pay until we inspect the merchandise. 162 00:10:13,230 --> 00:10:14,790 What are you trying to pull here, huh? 163 00:10:16,170 --> 00:10:17,169 What do you mean? 164 00:10:17,170 --> 00:10:18,370 You call this fresh? 165 00:10:18,690 --> 00:10:22,610 Their eyes are cloudy, their gills are cut out. Wear their little medic alert 166 00:10:22,610 --> 00:10:23,610 bracelets. 167 00:10:25,010 --> 00:10:27,230 How could you want them to look, huh? They're dead. 168 00:10:30,510 --> 00:10:32,890 Listen, pal, and listen carefully. 169 00:10:33,530 --> 00:10:37,250 The people in this restaurant deserve the best we have to offer. 170 00:10:38,390 --> 00:10:39,390 Look at this one. 171 00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:44,900 Bravo. Probably got up at daybreak to make her family breakfast, and then she 172 00:10:44,900 --> 00:10:49,020 goes off to work where she's paid just enough to cover the cost of child care. 173 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:53,880 Then she comes home at the end of the day to a house full of unmade beds and 174 00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:57,640 dirty dishes because her husband doesn't help her with the housework. 175 00:10:57,900 --> 00:11:01,740 Don't you think the least we could do is give this woman a decent piece of fish 176 00:11:01,740 --> 00:11:03,820 to help her forget the burdens of her life? 177 00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:05,880 Actually, I'm a prostitute. 178 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:16,080 to make a point. Are you a man? 179 00:11:16,620 --> 00:11:18,000 Oh, yeah. Ask around. 180 00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:26,000 Well, you are what is wrong with the planet. I don't want your rock. Hey! 181 00:11:26,340 --> 00:11:30,940 You tried to cheat me. Nobody cheats Santa Paladino. You got that? 182 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:35,220 Hey, hey! Assault the battery. Mental anguish. Now I'm scared of fish. I got a 183 00:11:35,220 --> 00:11:36,099 lawsuit here, lady. 184 00:11:36,100 --> 00:11:37,100 You got... 185 00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:48,559 It's in there. 186 00:11:48,560 --> 00:11:49,560 Don't hurt me. 187 00:11:52,180 --> 00:11:54,320 What are you looking at? Who said you could look at me? 188 00:11:54,660 --> 00:11:55,660 Who's looking? 189 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,160 What's to see? 190 00:12:05,560 --> 00:12:07,780 Oh, she's a wild girl. 191 00:12:09,700 --> 00:12:10,700 Very wild. 192 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:16,020 Well, their kids will be short, but they'll be peppy. 193 00:12:42,890 --> 00:12:47,150 Let me ask you, how would you go about making an impression on someone like 194 00:12:48,410 --> 00:12:51,290 Well, as you know, I'm at an advantage looking the way I look. 195 00:12:54,910 --> 00:12:57,930 And then there's that whole monologue I do from Glengarry Glen Ross. 196 00:12:58,910 --> 00:13:00,030 Good icebreaker, huh? 197 00:13:00,790 --> 00:13:04,070 But for an average guy like yourself, I think the most important thing is to 198 00:13:04,070 --> 00:13:05,130 find some common ground. 199 00:13:06,310 --> 00:13:08,510 Women like it when you ask questions about themselves. 200 00:13:09,900 --> 00:13:13,180 Of course, then you have to listen to all their crap, but, hey, that's the 201 00:13:13,180 --> 00:13:14,180 of admission. 202 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:16,800 All right. 203 00:13:16,820 --> 00:13:17,820 Wish me luck, huh? 204 00:13:18,100 --> 00:13:19,100 Good luck. 205 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:24,300 Come on, Jack. 206 00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:26,880 You have to forget about Wally. I have. 207 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:29,060 Boy, it's really good. 208 00:13:30,340 --> 00:13:31,340 I can't eat. 209 00:13:31,540 --> 00:13:33,040 I keep thinking about Wally. 210 00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:34,660 I think she's going to come back. 211 00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:35,980 All right. 212 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,300 I want you to listen to me, Jack. 213 00:13:38,410 --> 00:13:39,490 I don't want to have to do this. 214 00:13:41,230 --> 00:13:45,130 But there's something you need to know about Wally. Something I never told you. 215 00:13:45,970 --> 00:13:50,530 In fact, I'm not sure I should even tell you now. 216 00:13:51,170 --> 00:13:53,810 Meg, you can't start something like that and not finish it. What are you talking 217 00:13:53,810 --> 00:13:55,270 about? All right, Jack. 218 00:13:55,610 --> 00:14:01,650 Wally... Wally voted for Perot. 219 00:14:06,330 --> 00:14:07,510 Oh, my God. 220 00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:13,140 and eye coordination. 221 00:14:13,180 --> 00:14:15,440 I bet you could drive one of those long fire trucks. 222 00:14:15,660 --> 00:14:16,660 Henry! 223 00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:21,980 By the way, I read that Dennis Weaver, he built an entire house out of mud, tin 224 00:14:21,980 --> 00:14:23,600 cans, and left over old tires. 225 00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:25,780 There's an environmentalist, huh? 226 00:14:26,340 --> 00:14:28,480 You ever wonder what it'd be like going to dinner at his house? 227 00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:31,360 I'm sorry, we can't eat in the dining room tonight. It's got a flat. 228 00:14:33,220 --> 00:14:35,420 It's a joke. I don't really think that would happen. 229 00:14:38,860 --> 00:14:40,160 What the hell are you doing, man? 230 00:14:40,660 --> 00:14:41,660 What? 231 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,080 You're talking to the talent. 232 00:14:43,820 --> 00:14:45,820 Hey, don't talk to the talent. 233 00:14:46,140 --> 00:14:49,120 Now, if you want to talk to the talent, you've got to go through me. Now, get 234 00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:50,660 back out there and let the woman do her work. 235 00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:56,160 How do you feel? Oh, you seem a little tense. 236 00:14:56,700 --> 00:15:00,100 Yeah, I am, Ava. I'm a little tense tonight. I know you're depending on me, 237 00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:01,760 I don't want to let you down. 238 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:03,220 Well, you've got to stay loose. 239 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:04,699 Are you hot? 240 00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:07,700 Henry, Henry, Fanny, Nadine, ice water for the woman. 241 00:15:08,590 --> 00:15:11,650 Wally never put that much garlic on the duck. How is that helping? I'm just 242 00:15:11,650 --> 00:15:12,650 saying. 243 00:15:13,610 --> 00:15:15,730 God, isn't it fair? 244 00:15:16,530 --> 00:15:18,210 Look at all those people out there. 245 00:15:19,430 --> 00:15:21,250 They followed me from the other restaurant. 246 00:15:22,290 --> 00:15:24,010 How did they find me so fast? 247 00:15:25,230 --> 00:15:26,230 I'm not ready. 248 00:15:26,470 --> 00:15:30,490 The menu isn't right. The kitchen's too small. The green peppers are hideous, 249 00:15:30,570 --> 00:15:32,690 hideous. That one looks like my cousin Helene. 250 00:15:36,650 --> 00:15:39,070 Looks like someone has a little case of stage fright. A little? 251 00:15:39,610 --> 00:15:40,610 Don't you understand? 252 00:15:41,150 --> 00:15:44,850 I finally get a chance to put my own stamp on a restaurant, and they show up 253 00:15:44,850 --> 00:15:46,710 soon. Do you know who those people are out there? 254 00:15:47,050 --> 00:15:48,050 Paying customers. 255 00:15:48,230 --> 00:15:50,290 No. They're the foodies. 256 00:15:50,490 --> 00:15:55,490 They run from restaurant to restaurant, just waiting to judge you. And if you 257 00:15:55,490 --> 00:15:58,850 blow it, they're off to the next place, and you're finished, the lousy vultures. 258 00:16:00,150 --> 00:16:02,810 Well, I can play their little game. 259 00:16:18,380 --> 00:16:19,760 You going steady with that duck? 260 00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,080 Use your fork. 261 00:16:25,860 --> 00:16:27,180 Is there a problem here? 262 00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:28,620 No, why? 263 00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:32,100 You're not eating your snapper. I don't want it. 264 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:34,540 You don't like it? 265 00:16:34,940 --> 00:16:35,940 I'm just not hungry. 266 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,960 So you order food with no intention of eating it? 267 00:16:41,820 --> 00:16:45,100 People notice that. They think something's wrong with the snapper and 268 00:16:45,100 --> 00:16:47,920 don't order it. And then the review comes out and I lose a star because of 269 00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:51,620 snapper. I really can't afford something like that happening. I have way too 270 00:16:51,620 --> 00:16:52,620 much at stake here. 271 00:16:57,080 --> 00:17:00,380 What was I thinking, just running from one disaster to the other? 272 00:17:01,660 --> 00:17:03,420 I'm always doing things like this. 273 00:17:04,079 --> 00:17:05,140 But it doesn't work. 274 00:17:05,599 --> 00:17:07,400 I have no one to blame but myself. 275 00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:13,720 I'd try to blame you, but you're such a wreck already, there'd be no fun in 276 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:14,720 that. 277 00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:18,470 all comes back to me. 278 00:17:19,150 --> 00:17:20,470 Big mouth me. 279 00:17:21,750 --> 00:17:27,230 Boy, life is a lot easier if you can avoid never putting yourself on the 280 00:17:28,550 --> 00:17:29,570 Tell me about it. 281 00:17:38,990 --> 00:17:42,030 Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention for a moment? 282 00:17:43,170 --> 00:17:45,830 Some of you may have noticed that I didn't eat my snapper. 283 00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:53,520 Let me just say that this very accomplished chef has done a heck of a 284 00:17:53,820 --> 00:17:54,820 Really. 285 00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:58,640 And if my day had gone a little differently, I would be enjoying it 286 00:18:01,380 --> 00:18:03,300 But you see, my girlfriend left me today. 287 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:08,800 And you know, it's funny. I never saw it coming. Jack. 288 00:18:09,260 --> 00:18:10,820 I don't know. Maybe it was me. 289 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,500 Maybe I just didn't pay attention to the signals. 290 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:16,600 Boy. 291 00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:18,730 I really put myself on the line, too. 292 00:18:20,190 --> 00:18:22,230 You know, I was never in love before. 293 00:18:22,450 --> 00:18:23,830 Sit down, you drunk! 294 00:18:31,710 --> 00:18:32,710 Unbelievable. 295 00:18:33,270 --> 00:18:34,770 All the snapper is gone. 296 00:18:35,450 --> 00:18:37,270 I think they ordered it out of sympathy. 297 00:18:38,770 --> 00:18:40,490 Anybody want coffee? I'm buying. 298 00:18:41,050 --> 00:18:42,050 I'll take one, Dana. 299 00:18:42,490 --> 00:18:43,490 All right. 300 00:18:43,930 --> 00:18:44,930 Here you go, Bob. 301 00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:50,940 She just called you Bob. 302 00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:53,540 That's okay. I can be Bob. 303 00:18:56,860 --> 00:18:59,840 Hey, Dana, you just called him Bob, not his name. 304 00:19:00,660 --> 00:19:01,660 Mm -hmm. 305 00:19:03,500 --> 00:19:04,840 Is it Carl? 306 00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:06,860 No, but, you know, that's fine. 307 00:19:07,140 --> 00:19:08,140 Glenn? 308 00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:09,720 Not Glenn, no. 309 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:12,760 Alan is a very popular name. 310 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:17,500 So, Jack, time to go home. 311 00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:19,280 Let's walk uptown together. 312 00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:22,800 Maybe stop at Three Guys from Greece and see what's turning in the pie carousel. 313 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,640 Nah, I think I'm just going to hang around here for a while longer. 314 00:19:27,540 --> 00:19:28,740 I don't feel like going home yet. 315 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:30,460 Okay. Suit yourself. 316 00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:36,700 But, Jack, I think you should do yourself a favor and get to know the new 317 00:19:36,700 --> 00:19:37,499 little better. 318 00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:38,540 She could be good for you. 319 00:19:39,060 --> 00:19:40,060 You don't know. 320 00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:41,299 I do know. 321 00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:42,360 I'm your best friend. 322 00:19:43,580 --> 00:19:46,280 And I just want to point out... 323 00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:48,520 That she's shorter than you are, Jack. 324 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:53,720 What are the odds of a woman like that coming into your life? 325 00:19:55,180 --> 00:19:56,420 Over the age of ten. 326 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:00,600 Think about it. 327 00:20:01,260 --> 00:20:02,260 Come on, Dick. 328 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,320 Shut up. 329 00:20:28,030 --> 00:20:29,030 You did? 330 00:20:29,630 --> 00:20:32,010 Yes. It was the least I could do. 331 00:20:32,490 --> 00:20:38,590 I mean, I really wanted to thank you for standing up in front of everybody and 332 00:20:38,590 --> 00:20:40,290 making such a fool of yourself tonight. 333 00:20:40,770 --> 00:20:43,590 You really took all the focus off my own craziness. 334 00:20:43,930 --> 00:20:44,930 Hey, no problem. 335 00:20:45,230 --> 00:20:47,810 Creating a diversion into public place is one of my special skills. 336 00:20:48,970 --> 00:20:51,310 Hey, this is my favorite, macaroni and cheese. 337 00:20:51,730 --> 00:20:53,050 I figured you for the type. 338 00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:57,840 Only, no, you got the top real brown and crunchy. Not everybody can do that. 339 00:20:58,060 --> 00:20:59,060 I know. 340 00:20:59,220 --> 00:21:00,320 I'm very talented. 341 00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:07,840 So, I guess you'd call this a temporary ceasefire, which is a good thing, since 342 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:09,960 you're going to be working here now, and this is my hangout. 343 00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:12,320 Well, actually, I'm not sure all today. 344 00:21:13,900 --> 00:21:17,800 I just need to prove something to myself, and tonight I did. 345 00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:19,480 Oh, that's right. 346 00:21:20,060 --> 00:21:22,520 You women aren't in anything long -term anymore. 347 00:21:24,270 --> 00:21:25,930 So, are you flying off to France, too? 348 00:21:27,950 --> 00:21:31,430 I heard they built this big resort just for women who can't make a commitment. 349 00:21:32,770 --> 00:21:34,830 Be sure and mention my name, you'll get a discount. 350 00:21:36,770 --> 00:21:39,750 From what I gather, you're not the one who should be giving lectures. 351 00:21:40,150 --> 00:21:43,510 Only in love once, and you're how old? 352 00:21:44,430 --> 00:21:46,730 Seems to me that your track record's not much better than mine. 353 00:21:47,550 --> 00:21:49,170 Come on, who are you going home to tonight? 354 00:21:51,650 --> 00:21:52,870 His name is James. 355 00:21:59,020 --> 00:22:00,020 He's my cat. 356 00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:03,300 Oh. 357 00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,400 You know, Jack, you really got to get back in the saddle again. 358 00:22:07,780 --> 00:22:09,120 No. No. 359 00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:10,640 That's it for me. 360 00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:12,300 I'm sure of it. 361 00:22:14,820 --> 00:22:16,840 But I could kiss you right now. 362 00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:22,280 And I guarantee your toes would curl. 363 00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:24,520 Your heart would stomp. 364 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:33,620 And for a few blindingly euphoric seconds, you would forget that woman's 365 00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:37,460 I'll never be able to forget about it. 366 00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:41,680 Wally. I knew that. 367 00:22:43,860 --> 00:22:45,540 See? You're right. 368 00:22:46,100 --> 00:22:47,520 Oh, that was love. 369 00:22:49,300 --> 00:22:50,460 Oh, come on. 370 00:22:50,660 --> 00:22:52,400 I probably just saved your life. 371 00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:54,360 Give me a break. 372 00:22:54,580 --> 00:22:56,100 I'm in a very vulnerable state. 373 00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:58,700 I called my mother today and it wasn't even a holiday. 374 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:02,340 Yeah, yeah. Tell yourself whatever you need. 375 00:23:02,740 --> 00:23:03,599 That's it. 376 00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,940 I'm out of here. You're really going to go home? You don't want me to set you up 377 00:23:06,940 --> 00:23:07,940 a cot right here? 378 00:23:08,100 --> 00:23:09,100 Eat dirt. 379 00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:10,800 You wish. 380 00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:19,140 So... You staying or what? 381 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:21,280 Maybe. 382 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:23,320 For a little while. 383 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:39,539 Hi, Dana. 384 00:23:39,540 --> 00:23:40,540 I'm home. 385 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:44,580 Oh, Dana, you know I'm ticklish here. Don't start. 386 00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:46,880 Dana! How are you? 387 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:49,340 Born a Sarah, Dana. 388 00:23:49,980 --> 00:23:50,980 Dana! 389 00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:52,760 Going my way? 390 00:23:54,940 --> 00:23:56,040 What the hell was that? 29812

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