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1
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♪ green acres is
The place to be ♪
2
00:00:33,133 --> 00:00:37,102
♪ farm livin' is
The life for me ♪
3
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:41,073
♪ land spreadin'
Out so far and wide ♪
4
00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:45,043
♪ keep manhattan, just
Give me that countryside ♪
5
00:00:45,112 --> 00:00:49,147
♪ new york is where
I'd rather stay ♪
6
00:00:49,216 --> 00:00:53,085
♪ I get allergic smelling hay ♪
7
00:00:53,153 --> 00:00:57,155
♪ I just adore a
Penthouse view ♪
8
00:00:57,224 --> 00:01:00,025
♪ darling, I love you,
But give me park avenue ♪
9
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:03,661
♪ the chores ♪
10
00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:05,797
♪ the stores ♪
11
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:08,166
♪ fresh air ♪
12
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:09,368
♪ times square ♪
13
00:01:09,436 --> 00:01:11,036
♪ you are my wife ♪
14
00:01:11,105 --> 00:01:12,737
♪ goodbye, city life ♪
15
00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:16,341
♪ green acres, we are there ♪
16
00:01:35,062 --> 00:01:36,261
Good morning, darling.
17
00:01:36,330 --> 00:01:37,374
Good morning.
18
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:39,331
What are you hitting
The toaster for?
19
00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:40,732
The toast won't go down.
20
00:01:40,801 --> 00:01:41,801
5.
21
00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:43,756
5?
22
00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:46,939
Lisa, what...
23
00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:50,375
That's the number you've got to
Say if you want to make toast: 5.
24
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:55,713
Come on, that's impossible.
25
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:58,683
Just because you say 5...
26
00:01:58,752 --> 00:02:01,586
You'll never get your
Toast done that way. 5.
27
00:02:03,490 --> 00:02:06,158
How many eggs do you
Want for breakfast? 3?
28
00:02:06,226 --> 00:02:07,346
2.
29
00:02:08,695 --> 00:02:10,329
You got to watch that.
30
00:02:10,397 --> 00:02:11,629
3 and 2 is 5.
31
00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,467
I don't believe it.
32
00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:16,969
How do you want your eggs,
33
00:02:17,037 --> 00:02:18,770
Fried or scrabbled?
34
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:21,106
Uh, scrambled.
35
00:02:21,175 --> 00:02:23,342
I don't know how to do that.
36
00:02:23,410 --> 00:02:25,677
Your toast is burning. 5.
37
00:02:25,745 --> 00:02:26,905
Oh!
38
00:02:30,250 --> 00:02:31,490
What's that?
39
00:02:32,552 --> 00:02:33,718
An egg.
40
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:38,357
A square egg?
41
00:02:38,425 --> 00:02:41,059
One of the girls must
Have a square egg-maker.
42
00:02:42,096 --> 00:02:43,828
Lisa,
43
00:02:43,897 --> 00:02:47,099
I'm having trouble enough believing
A toaster that works when you say 5,
44
00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:52,070
Bu-but a square
Egg, that's ridiculous.
45
00:02:52,139 --> 00:02:54,572
Well, you're the one who
Wanted to live on a farm.
46
00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:55,986
What's that got to do with it?
47
00:02:56,010 --> 00:02:57,010
Morning.
48
00:02:58,712 --> 00:03:00,490
Hey, somebody's
Toast is burning.
49
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:01,579
5.
50
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:06,318
Ain't that a square egg?
51
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:07,986
Oh, yeah.
52
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,532
How'd you do it, mr. Douglas?
53
00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:12,535
No, I didn't do it. Somebody's
Playing a joke on us.
54
00:03:12,559 --> 00:03:13,925
They planted the egg.
55
00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:16,194
I didn't know you
Could plant eggs.
56
00:03:16,263 --> 00:03:19,164
No, I didn't mean that.
Uh, n-no, this is a phony.
57
00:03:19,233 --> 00:03:21,553
Yeah. There's nothing
Inside of it but, uh...
58
00:03:24,004 --> 00:03:25,004
A yolk!
59
00:03:26,573 --> 00:03:27,717
How'd you do that?
60
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,752
Put a round egg
In a square shell?
61
00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:31,476
I didn't do it.
62
00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:32,710
It's real!
63
00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:34,499
Uh, oh, why, it couldn't be.
64
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:35,847
Why not?
65
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:38,216
One of the chickens
Must have made a mistake.
66
00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:39,518
A mistake?
67
00:03:39,586 --> 00:03:41,386
Well, they're only human.
68
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:49,227
Somebody's pulling
Your leg, newt.
69
00:03:49,296 --> 00:03:52,308
Yeah, newt, there ain't no
Such thing as a talking turkey.
70
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:54,533
Well, perky dillon's got one.
71
00:03:54,601 --> 00:03:55,845
Did you hear him talk?
72
00:03:55,869 --> 00:03:57,169
Yup.
73
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,104
That's impossible.
74
00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:01,573
You heard the
Expression "Talk turkey"?
75
00:04:01,641 --> 00:04:02,807
So perky's does.
76
00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:04,176
What did he say?
77
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,810
Who, perky or the turkey?
78
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:07,412
The turkey.
79
00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:09,648
Clear as anything, he
Said, "Good morning."
80
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,949
Good morning.
81
00:04:11,017 --> 00:04:12,350
There, he said it again.
82
00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:14,564
Oh, that was mr. Douglas.
83
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:15,620
Huh?
84
00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:17,889
Newt thought you
Were a talkin' turkey.
85
00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:19,669
A talking...
86
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:21,704
There's no such thing.
87
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:24,028
There ain't no such
Thing as a square egg,
88
00:04:24,098 --> 00:04:25,297
But you got one.
89
00:04:25,365 --> 00:04:26,864
How did you find out ab...
90
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:29,479
Oh, you can't keep a thing
Like that a secret, mr. Douglas.
91
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:30,713
How'd you do it?
92
00:04:30,737 --> 00:04:32,704
I didn't do it, one
Of my hens did it.
93
00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:33,938
Which one?
94
00:04:34,007 --> 00:04:35,140
I didn't ask her.
95
00:04:35,209 --> 00:04:38,876
Maybe we can get perky's
Turkey to question them.
96
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:41,813
Uh, mr. Drucker, uh, do you
Carry electric toasters?
97
00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:43,348
I thought you had one.
98
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:46,229
Well, I have, but it's not working
Right. The bread doesn't go down.
99
00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:48,153
You try saying 3 to it?
100
00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:51,022
Maybe he's got an 8.
101
00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:53,791
No I've got a 5.
102
00:04:53,860 --> 00:04:55,727
Never heard of a 5.
103
00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:58,563
Ah, must be a
Discontinued model.
104
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,932
Yeah, yeah, all the
Newer models start with 8.
105
00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:03,635
Except 29b, that
Works on 7 and a half.
106
00:05:04,871 --> 00:05:06,138
7 and a...
107
00:05:06,206 --> 00:05:08,906
Does the bread go up and
Down when you say 5 to it?
108
00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:11,209
Yes, but...
109
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:13,512
I thought you said it
Wasn't working right?
110
00:05:13,580 --> 00:05:15,891
Well, when I first bought
It, you... You put the bread in,
111
00:05:15,915 --> 00:05:18,350
It goes down, it gets
Toasted, and then it comes up.
112
00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:19,618
Without saying anything?
113
00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:20,686
That's right.
114
00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:23,255
Well, you ought to
Have brought it in then.
115
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:26,224
That's when it
Wasn't working right.
116
00:05:26,293 --> 00:05:29,161
If you don't like 5, mr. Douglas,
Why don't you bring it in?
117
00:05:29,229 --> 00:05:31,796
Maybe I can tinker it in
To some other number.
118
00:05:33,267 --> 00:05:34,866
No, 5 is, uh...
119
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,079
Would...
120
00:05:39,173 --> 00:05:40,639
I'll see you later.
121
00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:47,045
Hi. Hello, darling.
122
00:05:47,113 --> 00:05:49,025
Did you get the new toaster?
123
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:52,028
No, I didn't get one. Mr. Drucker said
That there's nothing wrong with this one.
124
00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:53,451
It's just a discontinued model.
125
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,054
They no longer make a 5.
126
00:05:57,991 --> 00:06:00,625
You can be replaced
With a 7 and a half.
127
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,405
What is a 7 and a half?
128
00:06:02,429 --> 00:06:04,196
I don't know, it's
Something mr. Drucker...
129
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,909
Does it do anything
That you can't do with a 5?
130
00:06:08,569 --> 00:06:10,235
I'm warning you.
131
00:06:11,971 --> 00:06:13,805
I just can't understand it, I...
132
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:17,075
It must be something
They put in the electricity.
133
00:06:17,143 --> 00:06:19,477
Maybe they florigate it.
134
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:22,146
Fluoridate. Uh, no, that's
What they do with water.
135
00:06:22,216 --> 00:06:24,561
Then what do they
Do with electrissical?
136
00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:27,118
I don't know, I
Can't explain it.
137
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:29,053
Maybe you can explain this.
138
00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:30,555
Explain what?
139
00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:35,460
Mmm!
140
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:38,136
Chocolate malted.
141
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:40,998
I know, I just got
It out of eleanor.
142
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:42,812
What? Not only that.
143
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:45,903
I got a pail of strawberry
From her, one of boysenberry,
144
00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:47,505
And one of pistachio.
145
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:49,374
Different flavors from each tap.
146
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,712
Had you going, didn't I?
147
00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:55,347
Very funny.
148
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,181
Some practical joke.
149
00:06:57,251 --> 00:07:00,352
Why would eleanor
Play a practitioner's joke?
150
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:01,919
Not eleanor, eb.
151
00:07:01,988 --> 00:07:04,500
Did you put that
Square egg out there?
152
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:05,690
No, sir.
153
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,393
Eb, no hen lays a square egg.
154
00:07:08,462 --> 00:07:09,972
No, they lay 3 of them.
155
00:07:09,996 --> 00:07:11,796
Oh, that's impossible.
156
00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:13,998
Don't tell me,
Tell whoever did it.
157
00:07:18,037 --> 00:07:21,673
Do you have any idea
Which hen laid these eggs.
158
00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:23,085
It could be anyone of 6.
159
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:25,843
Oh, you got a new toaster.
160
00:07:25,912 --> 00:07:28,352
No, it's the same old one.
161
00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:32,617
It's gone berserk, it's
Clicking on all numbers.
162
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:33,951
I'm not surprised.
163
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,954
The way you yelled at it,
It doesn't know what it is.
164
00:07:37,023 --> 00:07:39,924
Lisa, which hen do you
Think laid the eggs?
165
00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:41,993
I don't know.
166
00:07:42,061 --> 00:07:44,228
Well, it shouldn't be
Too hard to find out.
167
00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:47,231
All we gotta do is look
For a square chicken.
168
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,636
Ok, you guys, line up.
169
00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:53,605
Which one of you
Laid the square egg?
170
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:57,548
Well, you're not going
To find out that way.
171
00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,243
How are you gonna find out?
172
00:07:59,313 --> 00:08:00,978
Well, uh...
173
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:02,914
How about giving 'em
A lie detector test?
174
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:04,616
Yeah.
175
00:08:04,685 --> 00:08:06,785
How about putting one
Of the square eggs down,
176
00:08:06,853 --> 00:08:09,354
And then see
Which hen sits on it.
177
00:08:09,423 --> 00:08:12,757
How do you know that the
Hen that laid it is gonna sit on it?
178
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,659
Mother instinct.
179
00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:16,160
Oh?
180
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:17,829
Well, it's worth a try.
181
00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:19,364
Ah, lisa.
182
00:08:19,433 --> 00:08:20,632
Yes, darling?
183
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:22,478
Uh, bring out a
Square egg, will you?
184
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,935
Uh, which one?
185
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:25,570
Any one.
186
00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:27,872
Should I tell them
What we're gonna do?
187
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:30,007
Look, you're not...
No, I guess not.
188
00:08:30,076 --> 00:08:32,176
It might put 'em on their guard.
189
00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:33,511
Here they are.
190
00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,316
I broke them.
191
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:40,284
Up you go.
192
00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:42,332
Well, what did you
Want them for, anyhow?
193
00:08:42,356 --> 00:08:44,756
Well, we thought whoever
Laid it might sit on 'em.
194
00:08:44,825 --> 00:08:48,526
Well, they wouldn't sit
On it now, it's too messy.
195
00:08:48,595 --> 00:08:50,228
Yeah. She'll lay another one.
196
00:08:50,296 --> 00:08:51,329
Who will?
197
00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:52,775
The one who laid these.
198
00:08:52,799 --> 00:08:53,965
And what if she doesn't?
199
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:55,299
But she did!
200
00:08:55,369 --> 00:08:57,736
What?
201
00:08:57,804 --> 00:09:00,085
The square-egg
Layer has struck again.
202
00:09:00,940 --> 00:09:02,240
Did you see who did it?
203
00:09:02,308 --> 00:09:04,208
No, but I'll bet it's her.
204
00:09:05,645 --> 00:09:08,380
She has a smug look on her beak.
205
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,147
If we could separate them.
206
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,684
We could put them in
Those old cages in the barn.
207
00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:15,598
We are not going to
Put my girls in any cages.
208
00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:18,022
Oh, come on, it's
Not gonna hurt them.
209
00:09:29,436 --> 00:09:30,702
You see anything, eb?
210
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:31,936
Nothing yet.
211
00:09:38,111 --> 00:09:39,522
What are you doing?
212
00:09:39,546 --> 00:09:41,312
I'm watching the chickens.
213
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:42,947
What for?
214
00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:45,483
To see which one is
Laying the square egg.
215
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:47,526
Oh, boy.
216
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,487
Mr. Douglas,
217
00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:52,234
You didn't fall off anything
Today and hit your head?
218
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:53,625
How about yesterday?
219
00:09:53,693 --> 00:09:57,629
I haven't fallen off anything
And hit my head in weeks.
220
00:09:57,697 --> 00:09:59,341
But you're seeing square eggs?
221
00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:00,765
That's what I said.
222
00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:03,000
Seen any square watermelons?
223
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:04,135
No.
224
00:10:04,203 --> 00:10:05,548
How about flying saucers?
225
00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:06,638
No.
226
00:10:06,706 --> 00:10:08,239
Just square eggs?
227
00:10:08,308 --> 00:10:09,441
Yes.
228
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:13,177
When did you start
Drinking again?
229
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,512
Mr. Kimball...
230
00:10:14,581 --> 00:10:16,581
Mr. Douglas, emily
Just laid an egg.
231
00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:19,250
Excuse me.
232
00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:23,621
Oh, it's round.
233
00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:25,990
That's a shame.
234
00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:27,625
Mr. Kimball,
235
00:10:27,694 --> 00:10:30,795
One of these chickens
Is laying square eggs.
236
00:10:30,864 --> 00:10:32,875
Mr. Douglas, that's impossible.
237
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:34,677
Well, it's not impossible.
238
00:10:34,701 --> 00:10:36,446
Yes, it is impossible.
239
00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:37,836
Would you like to see one?
240
00:10:37,904 --> 00:10:39,014
One what?
241
00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:40,204
A square egg.
242
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,585
So you're still on that kick?
243
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:43,942
I'll show you one.
244
00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:45,109
Eb.
245
00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:46,845
Keep an eye on things, will you?
246
00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:47,993
Don't worry, I... I...
247
00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:50,748
You stupid...
248
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:52,383
Mr. Douglas,
249
00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:54,163
How long after eb started
Dropping things on your head
250
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:56,621
Did you start seeing
These, uh, square eggs?
251
00:10:56,690 --> 00:11:00,859
This is the first time eb ever
Dropped anything on my head.
252
00:11:00,927 --> 00:11:03,728
And you haven't
Started drinking?
253
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:07,431
Mr. Kimball, you come with
Me, I'll show you a square egg.
254
00:11:18,945 --> 00:11:20,712
Now do you believe it?
255
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:22,146
That doesn't prove anything.
256
00:11:22,215 --> 00:11:23,258
What?
257
00:11:23,282 --> 00:11:26,117
That's a round egg
In a square shell.
258
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:28,252
Square shell?
259
00:11:28,321 --> 00:11:32,089
Mr. Douglas, the chicken that laid
That egg has a fortune in her hands.
260
00:11:32,158 --> 00:11:34,859
Well, not in her hands.
261
00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:36,539
What do you mean, a fortune?
262
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:39,123
Well, old ned moody, over at
The chicken breeders' association,
263
00:11:39,165 --> 00:11:42,634
Has been trying to breed a chicken
That would lay square eggs for years.
264
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,936
And he said it'd, uh,
Revolutionize the egg business.
265
00:11:45,005 --> 00:11:47,138
Well, it wouldn't
Do easter any good.
266
00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:48,573
Easter?
267
00:11:48,642 --> 00:11:51,954
Well, you couldn't roll a square
Egg on the president's lawn.
268
00:11:51,978 --> 00:11:54,078
You'd have an
Easter egg schlide.
269
00:11:54,147 --> 00:11:55,257
Lisa...
270
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:56,592
Uh, what were you saying?
271
00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:59,551
I was saying you'll have
An easter egg schlide.
272
00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:00,919
No, not you, you.
273
00:12:00,987 --> 00:12:03,120
An easter egg schlide
Is all right with me.
274
00:12:03,189 --> 00:12:06,257
No, no, what were you
Saying about mr. Moody?
275
00:12:06,325 --> 00:12:09,594
Oh, that crackpot? Do you
Know what he's been trying to do?
276
00:12:09,663 --> 00:12:12,597
Breed a chicken that
Would lay a square egg.
277
00:12:12,666 --> 00:12:15,199
And we know there's
No such thing as a...
278
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:19,604
Where'd that come from? Oh, that's
What you wanted to see mr. Moody about.
279
00:12:19,673 --> 00:12:22,018
No, I didn't want
To see mr. Moody.
280
00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:24,742
Then why do you keep
Mentioning his name?
281
00:12:24,811 --> 00:12:27,278
You keep mentioning his name!
282
00:12:27,346 --> 00:12:28,713
Any idea why?
283
00:12:28,782 --> 00:12:31,883
Oh, yeah. He'd be very
Interested in this.
284
00:12:31,952 --> 00:12:35,620
Probably offer you a lot of
Money for the chicken that laid it.
285
00:12:35,689 --> 00:12:36,955
If it isn't a gag.
286
00:12:37,023 --> 00:12:38,434
No, no, it isn't a gag.
287
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:40,625
Yeah, I bet it's made
Out of nutty putty.
288
00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:45,262
Well, there's nothing
Nutty about that putty.
289
00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:46,598
It's all egg.
290
00:12:46,666 --> 00:12:48,265
Well, uh, so long.
291
00:12:51,170 --> 00:12:52,236
Sorry, I...
292
00:12:52,305 --> 00:12:54,138
I'll have mr. Moody drop by.
293
00:12:55,709 --> 00:12:57,675
He broke the egg.
294
00:12:57,744 --> 00:13:00,912
Oh, there, don't worry,
You'll get another one.
295
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,449
Nothing, nothing,
Nothing, nothing.
296
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:07,619
Uh, would you mind standing up?
297
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:11,255
Come on, come on, up
On your feet, up, up.
298
00:13:12,892 --> 00:13:15,292
That is no way to
Talk to a nice chicken.
299
00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:18,836
Henrietta, would
You please stand up?
300
00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:22,100
Thank you.
301
00:13:22,568 --> 00:13:24,468
Nothing.
302
00:13:24,537 --> 00:13:26,470
No eggs, not even a round one.
303
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:29,273
I'm not surprised.
304
00:13:29,342 --> 00:13:32,354
How can you expect them to lay
Eggs when they're all copped up?
305
00:13:32,378 --> 00:13:33,945
Cooped up.
306
00:13:34,014 --> 00:13:36,413
Would you lay an egg
Under those circumstances?
307
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:39,350
I wouldn't lay an egg
Under any circumstances.
308
00:13:39,418 --> 00:13:42,820
You only say that because
You are not a chicken.
309
00:13:42,889 --> 00:13:45,690
She's got to lay eggs. What
Else can she do with them?
310
00:13:45,759 --> 00:13:47,903
Well there's no use
Keeping them cooped up.
311
00:13:47,927 --> 00:13:49,827
Copped up.
312
00:13:49,896 --> 00:13:51,295
I'm going to let them out.
313
00:13:51,364 --> 00:13:53,831
Might as well. You
Stupid chickens.
314
00:13:54,668 --> 00:13:56,267
Come on, henrietta.
315
00:13:56,335 --> 00:13:57,902
Uh, come on, girls.
316
00:13:57,971 --> 00:13:59,503
Stretch your drumsticks.
317
00:13:59,572 --> 00:14:01,839
Come on, darling. Emily.
318
00:14:01,908 --> 00:14:04,709
There you are. Come
On. Out, out, out.
319
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:09,047
I might as well take
These cages out.
320
00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:16,087
Look, another one.
321
00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:20,136
I knew my girls
Won't let you down.
322
00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:21,492
Now, which one was in this cage?
323
00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:23,139
The one that laid
The square egg.
324
00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:25,262
I know, but which one?
325
00:14:25,331 --> 00:14:26,698
Which one of you, uh...
326
00:14:29,468 --> 00:14:30,968
Oh, you miserable...
327
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:32,770
Oliver!
328
00:14:32,839 --> 00:14:35,773
This is the most frustrating...
329
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:38,242
What are you trying
To do, keep it a secret?
330
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,222
You know the old saying:
331
00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:43,781
"You can lead a horse over the
Water but you can't make him think."
332
00:14:45,018 --> 00:14:46,584
You lead a...
333
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:47,952
Oh, lisa.
334
00:14:57,864 --> 00:14:59,430
Oh, mr. Haney.
335
00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:01,577
Well, howdy, mr. Douglas.
336
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:02,834
There you are.
337
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,969
$10? What's that for?
338
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:07,872
Mr. Douglas, you can say
What you want about me.
339
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:11,042
But I ain't one to
Defraud a neighbor.
340
00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:12,409
What?
341
00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:14,757
Now if you'll just help me
Get them chickens on my truck...
342
00:15:14,781 --> 00:15:15,813
What chickens?
343
00:15:15,882 --> 00:15:18,816
Them inferiors I sold you.
344
00:15:18,885 --> 00:15:20,996
Oh, when I think of
What they've done,
345
00:15:21,020 --> 00:15:25,256
I feel like a pink possum
In a dry goods store.
346
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:27,792
A pink... What does that mean?
347
00:15:27,861 --> 00:15:30,427
It means I'm giving
You back your $10.
348
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:33,697
Now if you'll just give me a
Hand in rounding up them hens...
349
00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:36,067
Oh, no, no. No, thanks,
And here's your $10...
350
00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:38,669
I can't take it,
Mr. Douglas, no, sir.
351
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:41,705
I sold you them
Chickens in good faith,
352
00:15:41,775 --> 00:15:44,142
And if they are
Laying distorted eggs,
353
00:15:44,210 --> 00:15:45,943
That ain't good faith.
354
00:15:46,012 --> 00:15:48,780
Oh, you heard about
The square egg.
355
00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:50,614
Square egg?
356
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:53,885
Oh, mr. Douglas,
I'm doubly sorry.
357
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:57,588
You keep the $10, and
I'll give you another $5
358
00:15:57,657 --> 00:16:00,391
For the grief and shame
That they've caused you.
359
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:04,695
Any chicken that would
Sink to laying a square egg
360
00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:07,265
Ought to be plucked
And fricasseed.
361
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:09,733
Now, if you just
Point out the culprit,
362
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:14,538
Well, I'll be glad to attend
To the sordid details.
363
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:18,475
Uh, you didn't happen to hear that that
Chicken might be very valuable, did you?
364
00:16:18,544 --> 00:16:21,112
Now, who told you
That, perky's turkey?
365
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,413
Mr. Kimball.
366
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:24,548
Well, that's just his opinion.
367
00:16:24,617 --> 00:16:28,186
Any square-egg-laying
Chicken is worthless.
368
00:16:28,254 --> 00:16:31,388
And I'll give you $20 for it.
369
00:16:31,457 --> 00:16:34,826
I'm, uh, very grateful for your
Generosity, but I'm not interested.
370
00:16:36,196 --> 00:16:39,230
You got any idea
Which one of the hens
371
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:41,443
Is putting out the
Eccentric eggs?
372
00:16:41,467 --> 00:16:42,700
No, I haven't.
373
00:16:42,768 --> 00:16:44,246
Would you like to find out?
374
00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:45,569
Yes, I would.
375
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:48,117
Well, then maybe we should
Take them all over to my place.
376
00:16:48,141 --> 00:16:49,340
What for?
377
00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:56,314
No charge.
378
00:16:56,382 --> 00:16:57,748
No thanks.
379
00:16:59,518 --> 00:17:02,887
Mr. Douglas, I've got
Some wonderful results
380
00:17:02,956 --> 00:17:04,621
From my watching service.
381
00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:07,691
Would you care to hear a
Letter from a grateful customer?
382
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:08,960
Mr. Haney, I'm not...
383
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,995
"Dear mr. Haney,
384
00:17:11,064 --> 00:17:13,497
"I want to thank you for
The wonderful service.
385
00:17:13,566 --> 00:17:16,633
"Without your help, I
Never would have found out
386
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:19,703
Which one of my chickens
Was laying the duck eggs."
387
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,039
Oh, come on.
388
00:17:22,108 --> 00:17:24,909
Now, I've got another
One from his brother,
389
00:17:24,978 --> 00:17:27,511
Whose duck was
Laying chicken eggs.
390
00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:29,881
Mr. Haney, goodbye.
391
00:17:29,949 --> 00:17:34,252
Would you like to buy a
Slightly used number 3 toaster?
392
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,520
No thanks, I've got a number 5.
393
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:44,428
Oh, fellow that sold me this
Truck said it had a number 2 hood.
394
00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:47,932
Now, why don't you return it
To him and get your money back?
395
00:17:48,001 --> 00:17:49,367
I think I will.
396
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:53,304
7.
397
00:18:07,353 --> 00:18:08,473
Come in.
398
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:10,922
Morning.
399
00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:12,223
My name is, uh...
400
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:14,203
Uh, would you like to
Have some breakfast? Huh?
401
00:18:14,227 --> 00:18:15,437
Coffee and toast.
402
00:18:15,461 --> 00:18:16,461
Well, I...
403
00:18:16,495 --> 00:18:17,495
5.
404
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:20,864
Lisa, did you...
405
00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:22,699
Oh, uh, how do you do?
406
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:23,879
Mr. Douglas? Yes.
407
00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:25,569
My name is moody.
408
00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:28,183
Mr. Moody, yes, you are the gentleman
That mr. Kimball told me about.
409
00:18:28,207 --> 00:18:30,607
That's right, from the
Chicken breeders' association.
410
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:33,722
Mr. Kimball tells me that
You've got a chicken that...
411
00:18:33,746 --> 00:18:35,424
He's not pulling
My leg now, is he?
412
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:37,448
Pulling your leg.
413
00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:39,550
Wait and see.
414
00:18:44,723 --> 00:18:45,883
There you are.
415
00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:51,996
How do you like your
Toast, mr. Moody?
416
00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:53,764
Huh?
417
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:54,932
5.
418
00:18:56,535 --> 00:18:59,270
It isn't ready yet,
I'll 5 it some more.
419
00:19:02,775 --> 00:19:05,154
What's shaking you up,
The toaster or the egg?
420
00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:06,243
The egg.
421
00:19:06,312 --> 00:19:07,345
Good.
422
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:08,946
And the toaster.
423
00:19:09,015 --> 00:19:11,482
Well, which one do
You want to talk about?
424
00:19:11,550 --> 00:19:13,484
The egg. Now, is this real?
425
00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:14,818
It certainly is.
426
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:17,054
It came right from
The horse's mouth.
427
00:19:17,923 --> 00:19:19,623
The horse's mouth?
428
00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:22,926
What she means is that
One of our chickens laid it.
429
00:19:22,996 --> 00:19:24,228
That's fantastic.
430
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:25,374
Yeah.
431
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,264
Now, you sure
That it... It... It's...
432
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:30,067
Here. Break it and see.
433
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:37,841
Well, I'll be.
434
00:19:37,910 --> 00:19:39,877
You want me to
Scrabble it for you?
435
00:19:39,945 --> 00:19:41,112
Scrabble?
436
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,247
Yes, you could have
It with your toast.
437
00:19:43,316 --> 00:19:44,348
5.
438
00:19:46,319 --> 00:19:48,785
Is that browned enough?
439
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:51,155
Now, mr. Douglas, uh,
Could I see these chickens?
440
00:19:51,224 --> 00:19:52,834
Sure, they're just outside.
441
00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:54,938
Here, put that away. Follow me.
442
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,196
Very nice to meet you, mrs. 5.
443
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:02,733
Douglas.
444
00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:05,503
Mr. Douglas.
445
00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:06,803
Hold it.
446
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:14,178
Another one.
447
00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:16,613
Mr. Douglas, mr. Kimball
Probably told you
448
00:20:16,682 --> 00:20:19,116
We've been trying to develop
Something like this for years.
449
00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:21,519
I don't know that you can
Develop something like that.
450
00:20:21,587 --> 00:20:23,254
Maybe it's just a
Freak of nature.
451
00:20:23,322 --> 00:20:25,867
There's just a chance that by
Hatching some of these eggs
452
00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:28,359
And cross-breeding, we
Might be able to produce
453
00:20:28,428 --> 00:20:30,272
A whole strain of
Square-egg layers.
454
00:20:31,364 --> 00:20:32,729
Which chicken is it?
455
00:20:32,798 --> 00:20:35,466
That's the hitch, we don't
Know, it's one of these.
456
00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:37,546
I'll make a deal with you.
457
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:40,382
You let me take the whole flock
And we'll find out which one it is.
458
00:20:40,406 --> 00:20:43,207
Now I'll give you $1,000
As evidence of good faith.
459
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:45,716
Plus a quarter of a cent
For every chick we hatch,
460
00:20:45,778 --> 00:20:48,279
Providing we're
Successful in the breeding.
461
00:20:48,347 --> 00:20:50,181
Have you got a check?
462
00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:52,216
Yup. I got a pen.
463
00:20:52,285 --> 00:20:53,684
You got a deal.
464
00:20:54,954 --> 00:20:56,287
You made a deal.
465
00:20:56,355 --> 00:20:58,400
How could you sell my friends?
466
00:20:58,424 --> 00:21:02,059
Lisa, this is a farm, we
Don't have any friends.
467
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:04,795
I mean, we're in
Business to make money.
468
00:21:04,863 --> 00:21:07,498
Spoken like a true
Arnold benedict.
469
00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:09,100
Benedict arnold.
470
00:21:09,168 --> 00:21:11,001
What did he do?
471
00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:12,703
He was a traitor.
472
00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:15,439
That's what you are,
You arnold benedict.
473
00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:18,542
Lisa, they were only chickens.
474
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:20,021
To you they are chickens,
475
00:21:20,045 --> 00:21:22,846
To me they were harriet,
And henrietta, and alice.
476
00:21:22,915 --> 00:21:25,516
I'll buy you a whole new flock.
477
00:21:25,585 --> 00:21:29,019
Don't bother. If I can't have
Them, I don't want any of you.
478
00:21:29,088 --> 00:21:30,088
Lisa.
479
00:21:43,202 --> 00:21:44,301
Lisa.
480
00:21:45,070 --> 00:21:46,370
Go away.
481
00:21:46,439 --> 00:21:48,939
I can't get the toaster to 5.
482
00:21:49,008 --> 00:21:51,708
Oh, you lost another friend.
483
00:21:51,777 --> 00:21:55,212
Now, come on. You've been mooning
For days over those stupid chickens.
484
00:21:55,281 --> 00:21:56,847
And I want to keep mooning.
485
00:21:56,915 --> 00:21:58,026
Mr. Douglas.
486
00:21:58,050 --> 00:21:59,528
Mr. Moody just drove up.
487
00:21:59,552 --> 00:22:00,996
Oh, I wonder what he wa...
488
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:05,422
Alice! Henrietta!
489
00:22:07,360 --> 00:22:09,193
Be careful with alice.
490
00:22:10,963 --> 00:22:13,564
Watch henrietta,
She's got a big beak.
491
00:22:13,633 --> 00:22:15,932
Mr. Moody, did you find
Out which one laid the, uh...
492
00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:17,635
None of them.
493
00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:18,703
You mean that they...
494
00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:21,338
Not one square egg.
495
00:22:21,407 --> 00:22:25,108
And to think that I could fall for
The old "Salting the gold mine" bit.
496
00:22:25,178 --> 00:22:26,921
How did you make
Those square eggs?
497
00:22:26,945 --> 00:22:28,646
I didn't.
498
00:22:28,714 --> 00:22:32,383
I should've known something was wrong
When I saw that phony 5 toaster you rigged.
499
00:22:32,451 --> 00:22:33,584
It wasn't rigged.
500
00:22:33,653 --> 00:22:35,364
I'd like my money back.
501
00:22:35,388 --> 00:22:36,388
You can have it.
502
00:22:36,455 --> 00:22:37,599
I've got it.
503
00:22:37,623 --> 00:22:40,057
I've already stopped
Payment on your check.
504
00:22:40,125 --> 00:22:41,825
Well, of all the...
505
00:22:45,164 --> 00:22:46,497
Oliver. What?
506
00:22:46,566 --> 00:22:48,332
Ooh, who did that?
507
00:22:48,401 --> 00:22:49,733
I don't know.
508
00:22:49,802 --> 00:22:51,802
Oh, now mr. Moody said that...
509
00:22:51,870 --> 00:22:53,070
And here they...
510
00:22:53,138 --> 00:22:54,705
I don't understand it.
511
00:22:54,773 --> 00:22:56,185
Well, that's very simple.
512
00:22:56,209 --> 00:22:57,886
The girls didn't know mr. Moody.
513
00:22:57,910 --> 00:22:59,243
What's that got to do with it?
514
00:22:59,312 --> 00:23:01,356
Well, there are things
You would do for friends,
515
00:23:01,380 --> 00:23:03,358
You wouldn't do for strangers.
516
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:04,781
Oh. Well...
517
00:23:04,850 --> 00:23:07,117
Aren't you glad the
Girls are at home?
518
00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:09,587
Yeah, yeah.
519
00:23:09,655 --> 00:23:11,021
What time is dinner?
520
00:23:11,090 --> 00:23:12,130
6.
521
00:23:19,332 --> 00:23:20,964
Well, good morning.
522
00:23:21,033 --> 00:23:22,099
Good morning, darling.
523
00:23:22,167 --> 00:23:23,167
You want some toast?
524
00:23:23,236 --> 00:23:24,635
Yes, I'll make it.
525
00:23:26,071 --> 00:23:27,151
5.
526
00:23:28,708 --> 00:23:29,708
5.
527
00:23:30,843 --> 00:23:32,243
Who are you talking to?
528
00:23:32,311 --> 00:23:33,410
The toaster.
529
00:23:33,479 --> 00:23:34,578
What for?
530
00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:36,625
To make the bread go down.
531
00:23:36,649 --> 00:23:38,716
This is the way it goes down.
532
00:23:40,185 --> 00:23:42,130
But it always went
Down when you said...
533
00:23:42,154 --> 00:23:44,766
You remember the expression
On mr. Moody's face when you...
534
00:23:44,790 --> 00:23:46,223
Who's mr. Moody?
535
00:23:46,292 --> 00:23:48,492
The man who took our chickens.
536
00:23:48,561 --> 00:23:50,527
Nobody took our chickens.
537
00:23:50,596 --> 00:23:52,996
Darling, do you feel all right?
538
00:23:53,532 --> 00:23:54,898
Oh, I...
539
00:23:54,967 --> 00:23:58,402
You didn't sleep very well, I
Thought you had a nightmare.
540
00:23:58,471 --> 00:23:59,548
Nightmare?
541
00:23:59,572 --> 00:24:00,604
Mmm-hmm.
542
00:24:00,673 --> 00:24:01,816
No, I don't remember...
543
00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,540
Would you like to
Have some eggs?
544
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:06,109
Eggs? Eggs! Yes, eggs.
545
00:24:06,178 --> 00:24:07,645
Here, I'll get them.
546
00:24:12,551 --> 00:24:14,229
What are you looking for?
547
00:24:14,253 --> 00:24:15,519
A square egg.
548
00:24:15,588 --> 00:24:18,054
We had a whole
Bowlful here yesterday.
549
00:24:18,123 --> 00:24:20,624
Boy, that must have
Been some dream.
550
00:24:21,494 --> 00:24:24,695
Dream? But it was so real.
551
00:24:28,901 --> 00:24:29,901
5.
552
00:24:30,969 --> 00:24:32,102
Where're you going?
553
00:24:32,171 --> 00:24:33,504
I'm going back to bed.
554
00:24:33,572 --> 00:24:36,139
If that's a dream, I
Want to see how it ends.
555
00:24:38,210 --> 00:24:40,377
Yelling numbers to toasters.
556
00:24:42,548 --> 00:24:43,548
Mable!
557
00:25:24,490 --> 00:25:27,290
this has been a filmways
Presentation, darling.
36106
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