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1
00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:05,680
Honky is your chicken.
2
00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:10,760
Honky is your goose. So come on, all you
coarse ass, and shake your caboose.
3
00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:12,480
Shake your caboose.
4
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,280
What did you think?
5
00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:15,800
Where did you get that cheer from?
6
00:00:16,020 --> 00:00:17,300
The Underground Railroad?
7
00:00:18,700 --> 00:00:21,000
If you don't watch it, you're going to
need Harriet Tubman.
8
00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:23,100
How was your evening breakfast?
9
00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:25,680
Awful. Heather had to drop off the
squad.
10
00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:29,140
Oh, good. That girl was so dizzy, she
forget how to spell SMC.
11
00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:31,660
No, Mama, that was me.
12
00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:35,200
Well, it can be confusing.
13
00:00:35,820 --> 00:00:36,880
So, uh, what happened?
14
00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,160
She got pregnant.
15
00:00:38,460 --> 00:00:42,360
If we don't find somebody to take her
place on the team, we can forget about
16
00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:45,280
competing in the regionals. Oh, well,
you still got time to find a
17
00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:46,640
I guess.
18
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:51,140
But what kind of dummy gets pregnant so
young and then drops out of school?
19
00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:59,140
The kind of dummy that gives up her
hopes, her dreams, her figure, and
20
00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:01,420
from 72 hours of labor for you.
21
00:01:02,330 --> 00:01:05,090
Yeah, that's right, Mama. Do that cheer
again. It was so cute.
22
00:01:05,610 --> 00:01:07,250
How lucky is your chicken?
23
00:01:09,130 --> 00:01:10,130
Girl.
24
00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:03,460
my keyboard and voila my system was up
and running oh it was nothing oh and uh
25
00:02:03,460 --> 00:02:10,340
thanks for fixing my computer too not
now t can't you see
26
00:02:10,340 --> 00:02:14,420
i'm busy yeah we're supposed to talk
about my research paper uh well i'll
27
00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:20,140
reschedule when can you say f all right
i'll tell you tomorrow like you're gonna
28
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:26,520
get some of that students can't live
with them can't get paid without them
29
00:02:28,300 --> 00:02:31,620
Back to us. Now, how can I thank you for
all your hard work?
30
00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:33,720
Professor, all I did was turn on your
monitor.
31
00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:37,160
Oh, you turned on much, much, much more
than that.
32
00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:40,540
Are you flirting with me? Well, um, yes.
33
00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:42,320
Is it working?
34
00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:44,120
I'm flattered, but I have a boyfriend.
35
00:02:44,820 --> 00:02:46,100
Well, we don't have to tell him.
36
00:02:47,340 --> 00:02:48,820
You are so funny.
37
00:02:49,620 --> 00:02:51,120
Funny, but out of luck, huh?
38
00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:54,680
Actually, you're not. I think I have
somebody who's perfect for you.
39
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:56,760
Well, does she look like you?
40
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,570
As a matter of fact, she does.
41
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,150
Well, I'm free Saturday.
42
00:03:03,190 --> 00:03:04,190
Hey, it's me.
43
00:03:04,550 --> 00:03:05,590
What are you doing Saturday?
44
00:03:06,150 --> 00:03:09,290
Good. I have somebody you have to meet.
You're going to love my mom.
45
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:11,930
He's a professor at SMC.
46
00:03:12,610 --> 00:03:14,070
No, he's not old, old.
47
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,210
He's middle -aged like you.
48
00:03:17,650 --> 00:03:19,050
Vanessa, I forgot.
49
00:03:19,910 --> 00:03:22,110
Saturday is my holy day. Gotta go. Bye.
50
00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:00,980
Somebody had to root for the Pilgrims.
51
00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:05,000
Don't do this to me.
52
00:04:06,180 --> 00:04:09,140
Well, see, baby, this is not about you.
It's about me.
53
00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:12,880
I had to quit the squad when I was
pregnant with you, so this is kind of
54
00:04:12,880 --> 00:04:14,800
second chance, and I don't want to let
it go.
55
00:04:18,399 --> 00:04:21,180
Well, we've all enjoyed a little stroll
down memory lane.
56
00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:23,620
But we're preparing for the regionals.
57
00:04:24,060 --> 00:04:26,860
That's right, and you've got to be able
to do more than clap your hands and
58
00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:27,860
stomp your...
59
00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:12,890
running shoes good because you're gonna
need them i gotta get fabric for my new
60
00:05:12,890 --> 00:05:17,910
cheerleading outfit new sneakers and a
new pair of pom -poms now i have a rule
61
00:05:17,910 --> 00:05:24,770
nothing kinky till the second date like
you have second dates i'm trying out for
62
00:05:24,770 --> 00:05:28,490
the smc cheerleading squad now why do
you want to be a cheerleader at your age
63
00:05:47,210 --> 00:05:48,210
Too happy.
64
00:05:48,930 --> 00:05:49,930
Professor!
65
00:05:50,190 --> 00:05:51,950
You look so... Young.
66
00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:55,210
Young?
67
00:05:55,470 --> 00:05:56,470
Try ill.
68
00:05:58,390 --> 00:05:59,890
Are you having a heart attack?
69
00:06:00,830 --> 00:06:05,350
Me? Who just climbed the Santa Monica
stairs a hundred times, followed by 90
70
00:06:05,350 --> 00:06:10,070
minutes of weight training and a 10K run
home.
71
00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:12,910
I got the heart of a 20 -year -old.
72
00:06:17,390 --> 00:06:19,830
to buy some of that Lady Egyptian
wrinkle cream that you sell.
73
00:06:21,110 --> 00:06:22,350
Yeah, yeah, from my mother.
74
00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:25,610
Yo, Mama, you can use some yourself.
75
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,470
Hush, Andal.
76
00:06:28,830 --> 00:06:30,630
More wrinkles mean more experience.
77
00:06:30,870 --> 00:06:33,170
And I'm like a man who knows how to get
the job done.
78
00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:39,630
Now, Professor, this miracle cream
smooths away wrinkles, shines your
79
00:06:39,630 --> 00:06:41,150
can be used as a dessert topping.
80
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:46,030
You're kidding, right? All right, you
got me.
81
00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:47,560
It's not so good on wrinkles.
82
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:57,020
I don't know what gets into some people.
They just can't act their age. Oh,
83
00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:59,120
well, can we talk about this while we
shop for my pom -poms?
84
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,360
Hey, baby. Hey, Mama.
85
00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:06,600
What's up with Professor Ogilvie? I just
asked him how he was doing, and he said
86
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:07,800
he was too legit to quit.
87
00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:10,640
What does that mean?
88
00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:14,780
Oh, now he's quoting M .C. Hammer?
89
00:07:15,070 --> 00:07:16,470
I hope he don't start wearing them genie
pants.
90
00:07:17,390 --> 00:07:20,370
Look, Puttin', me and that dog gonna go
down to the swap meet so we can shop for
91
00:07:20,370 --> 00:07:21,370
my cheerleading outfit.
92
00:07:21,610 --> 00:07:24,850
Mama, why do your dreams always turn
into my nightmares?
93
00:07:25,230 --> 00:07:26,730
Just means I'm doing my job, baby.
94
00:07:27,470 --> 00:07:29,550
Come on, girl.
95
00:07:31,310 --> 00:07:32,350
Bye, Poop. Bye.
96
00:07:39,230 --> 00:07:42,070
You want to be in a movie? I can make
you a star.
97
00:07:46,890 --> 00:07:49,690
I've got to get an A on my broadcast
journalism class. Not with that big old
98
00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:50,690
shiny forehead of yours.
99
00:07:53,610 --> 00:07:55,170
That was some footage worth shooting.
100
00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:00,190
Yo, yo, yo, yo. What's the dealio?
101
00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:04,050
Yo.
102
00:08:04,330 --> 00:08:05,590
Professor, is that you? Yeah.
103
00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:07,110
What do you think?
104
00:08:07,150 --> 00:08:08,290
I think I better go.
105
00:08:10,010 --> 00:08:13,570
All right, all right. But, Paige,
brother, you know, hit me on my hip.
106
00:08:22,410 --> 00:08:24,870
Which one? Will Smith? Denzel? No,
Cisco.
107
00:08:27,010 --> 00:08:29,910
You look good enough to be on BET's Walk
of Fame.
108
00:08:31,170 --> 00:08:33,490
Why are you wearing the cheerleading
uniform?
109
00:08:33,990 --> 00:08:35,350
Because I'm trying out for the squad.
110
00:08:35,789 --> 00:08:40,549
Uncle B, Uncle B, he's my man. If I
can't have him, no one can.
111
00:08:42,970 --> 00:08:44,390
Well, I have a little cheer for you.
112
00:08:44,810 --> 00:08:47,290
When I say X, you say it.
113
00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:49,650
X, X, X, X.
114
00:08:50,170 --> 00:08:51,830
X? Don't mind if I do.
115
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:56,420
Nikki, let's do this story.
116
00:08:57,940 --> 00:09:01,940
Nikki, you've just finished your
audition. Can you tell everyone how you
117
00:09:01,940 --> 00:09:02,539
it went?
118
00:09:02,540 --> 00:09:07,620
I pushed him back, pushed him back, way
back, way back. Yay, Nikki!
119
00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:11,180
Stevie, could you turn off the camera?
Me and Mama, we need to talk.
120
00:09:12,180 --> 00:09:13,680
Oh, what's wrong, baby?
121
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,460
Mama, you didn't make the team.
122
00:09:17,740 --> 00:09:19,760
Regina and Asia picked somebody else.
123
00:09:20,180 --> 00:09:22,500
What? But I was the best thing out
there.
124
00:09:22,740 --> 00:09:23,800
Right, you were the best.
125
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:25,740
But it's not about what you did.
126
00:09:26,180 --> 00:09:27,560
It's about the way you look.
127
00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:32,140
Uh -uh. Then this ain't right. And they
are not going to get away with it.
128
00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:34,160
That's right. I'm not going to let them
do this to us.
129
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:37,020
Us? I quit the team.
130
00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:38,900
Mama, they cheated you.
131
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,920
Man, forget those go team go hoochies.
132
00:09:43,580 --> 00:09:45,740
Oh, thanks, baby.
133
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:50,000
Now all we need to do is find a team of
our own. Yeah.
134
00:09:51,260 --> 00:09:52,260
You know what?
135
00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:54,800
Maybe we can get in touch with the other
girls they rejected.
136
00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:56,580
That's a great idea.
137
00:09:56,940 --> 00:09:57,940
Bring it on!
138
00:09:58,200 --> 00:09:59,200
Hey!
139
00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:07,280
This
140
00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:17,600
is
141
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:19,320
Stevie Van Lowe with a special report.
142
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,360
Cheerleader Wars, day one.
143
00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:25,000
I'm here with Nikki and Kim Parker, who
have just convinced the dean to allow
144
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,640
them to create an alternate cheerleading
squad.
145
00:10:27,940 --> 00:10:32,540
That's right. And we're challenging the
SMC cheerleaders to a cheer -off next
146
00:10:32,540 --> 00:10:36,440
week to see who should represent SMC in
the regional competition.
147
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:42,020
What prompted you ladies to take such a
drastic step? Gee, I'm over here.
148
00:10:44,540 --> 00:10:46,240
Yeah, but the honey's over there.
149
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:56,040
not good enough, then maybe it's time we
had a cheerleading team that's about
150
00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:57,040
school spirit.
151
00:10:57,300 --> 00:11:00,600
Yeah, it's not about who's most likely
to be in a trick daddy video.
152
00:11:01,220 --> 00:11:06,100
So this is a crusade to elevate
cheerleading in SMC from a tawdry
153
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,160
bare female flesh.
154
00:11:07,980 --> 00:11:08,980
Yeah, whatever.
155
00:11:10,820 --> 00:11:14,520
Plus, I want to kick their little Barbie
doll butt.
156
00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:18,760
Excuse us, we have to do some recruiting
right now.
157
00:11:21,450 --> 00:11:22,450
And that's a wrap.
158
00:11:23,930 --> 00:11:24,990
Not for me.
159
00:11:25,370 --> 00:11:27,070
You all want to be in my movie?
160
00:11:32,510 --> 00:11:39,490
Ladies, welcome to the first practice of
SMC's alternative cheerleading
161
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:42,090
team. Is this going to take long?
162
00:11:44,090 --> 00:11:46,130
Like you've got some place to go.
163
00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,720
That cheerleading is not about what you
look like on the outside, but what
164
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:02,840
you've got in your heart.
165
00:12:03,100 --> 00:12:06,240
I got a place for those bimbos that
rejected me.
166
00:12:07,020 --> 00:12:08,500
Right under my wheels.
167
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:13,900
I don't want to be a cheerleader, but
maybe I should just stick to
168
00:12:14,380 --> 00:12:18,320
Yeah. I got this really big project I'm
working on, and I haven't quite figured
169
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,640
out what I'm going to do, so... I'm
going to go.
170
00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:25,540
Not so fast, Einstein.
171
00:12:26,730 --> 00:12:29,070
can't back out now. We got something to
prove.
172
00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:31,110
Lacey's right.
173
00:12:31,170 --> 00:12:33,130
Now, you can't give up before you even
start.
174
00:12:33,470 --> 00:12:34,750
Yeah, don't be such a loser.
175
00:12:36,330 --> 00:12:38,870
Shut your trap, you Busta Rhymes reject.
176
00:12:41,190 --> 00:12:44,610
What did you just call me, you fugitive
from a demolition derby? All right,
177
00:12:44,630 --> 00:12:47,670
that's it. I'm about to burn rubber on
your butt. Oh, come on.
178
00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:02,130
I'm going to keep it simple.
179
00:13:06,130 --> 00:13:07,730
Elevator, elevator, give him the show.
180
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,000
Keeping it real.
181
00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,520
Not with them fake platinum chains.
182
00:14:36,220 --> 00:14:37,720
Professor Ogilvy, is that you?
183
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:39,880
Vanessa, what's up, baby?
184
00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:42,040
You look so... Young?
185
00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:44,000
No, that's not it.
186
00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:50,360
Maybe it's your hat or those clothes or
those chains you're wearing. Yeah, fly,
187
00:14:50,580 --> 00:14:51,519
huh?
188
00:14:51,520 --> 00:14:56,500
You see, you only see me at school, but,
you know, off the clock, this is how I
189
00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:57,500
roll.
190
00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:04,500
little sisters on the cheerleading
squad. No diggity?
191
00:15:06,660 --> 00:15:11,020
Vanessa, there you are. I've been
looking for you. Oh, and I've been
192
00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:12,020
you.
193
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,140
Heaven must be missing an angel.
194
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:18,540
Excuse me, do I know you? This is the
professor that I told you about,
195
00:15:18,540 --> 00:15:20,440
Ogilvie. This is Lorraine Jackson, my
mother.
196
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,080
Your mother?
197
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,340
Your middle -aged mother?
198
00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:29,280
You're a professor.
199
00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:30,600
Yeah.
200
00:15:30,920 --> 00:15:34,060
I don't always dress like this. Yeah,
just when he's off the clock.
201
00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:40,020
Look, I'm sorry we didn't have a chance
to hook up. I mean, I'm sorry I didn't
202
00:15:40,020 --> 00:15:42,540
get together with you Saturday, but I'm
free tonight.
203
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,700
In fact, I'm free right now.
204
00:15:45,860 --> 00:15:50,300
I'm really flattered, but you're a
little too young for me.
205
00:15:51,620 --> 00:15:52,620
I think it's starting.
206
00:16:04,910 --> 00:16:05,970
something on cheerleading, huh?
207
00:16:06,310 --> 00:16:09,710
Yeah. Okay, T, let's get ready. You know
I used to be a cheerleader, right?
208
00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:11,490
And, uh, you're in my shot.
209
00:16:11,890 --> 00:16:12,890
Oh, really?
210
00:16:13,270 --> 00:16:16,670
Um, and don't you, uh, please step
aside. I'm kind of trying to do a story
211
00:16:17,570 --> 00:16:21,610
Fine, be that way then. I was just
trying to give your audience a little
212
00:16:21,610 --> 00:16:22,610
kick.
213
00:16:25,390 --> 00:16:27,430
And now the judges are taking their
seats.
214
00:16:28,350 --> 00:16:33,970
The competition is about to begin. First
up, the mighty SMC Corsair!
215
00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:18,960
look like she stepped off the cover of a
fashion magazine.
216
00:19:19,220 --> 00:19:20,300
Am I right, Mama?
217
00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:22,780
No. Get oxygen.
218
00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:27,500
Girl,
219
00:19:27,780 --> 00:19:29,140
I told you it was too old for this.
220
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:35,700
Nikki, I'm sorry. We should have never
excluded you from the team.
221
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:37,080
Yeah, you guys were great.
222
00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:38,940
Any chance we could all work together?
223
00:21:10,830 --> 00:21:11,830
you think it went.
17759
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