Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:08,639 --> 00:00:09,840
Hi, I'm Brian Henson.
2
00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:14,200
This episode of The Muppet Show stars
the legendary dancer, choreographer,
3
00:00:14,340 --> 00:00:16,140
actor, director Gene Kelly.
4
00:00:17,240 --> 00:00:23,360
When Gene was first booked on the show,
he said to the writers, I just don't
5
00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:26,760
want to do Singing in the Rain. Well, of
course, the writers turned this into a
6
00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,960
running gag in which the Muppets keep
trying to get Gene to do his signature
7
00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:34,220
song. Is Gene excited about doing
Singing in the Rain on the show? Well,
8
00:00:34,220 --> 00:00:35,220
doesn't know about it yet.
9
00:00:35,940 --> 00:00:37,600
And finally, in the end...
10
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:40,520
As usual, the Muppets win out. I'm
singing.
11
00:00:43,740 --> 00:00:47,940
There's a great little sketch in this
one where Kermit dances full figure, and
12
00:00:47,940 --> 00:00:49,160
you see him head to toe dancing.
13
00:00:49,580 --> 00:00:53,940
The way we did it was the performers
doing the arms and legs are standing in
14
00:00:53,940 --> 00:00:58,400
shot in the background, but they're
wearing black against a black
15
00:00:58,400 --> 00:00:59,600
it's invisible to the camera.
16
00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:02,900
Here it is, Gene Kelly on The Muppet
Show.
17
00:01:07,030 --> 00:01:08,510
Up and down, not sideways.
18
00:01:12,410 --> 00:01:13,410
Who are you?
19
00:01:13,910 --> 00:01:15,030
Well, I'm Gene Kelly.
20
00:01:15,750 --> 00:01:19,190
Did Kermit leave a ticket for me? They
didn't have it at the box office.
21
00:01:19,530 --> 00:01:20,530
Gene Kelly?
22
00:01:20,570 --> 00:01:23,990
You don't need a ticket. You're
tonight's special guest star.
23
00:01:24,670 --> 00:01:29,210
Oh, gee, there must be some mistake. I
wasn't planning to do anything tonight.
24
00:01:29,210 --> 00:01:32,810
thought Kermit invited me over just to
watch the show.
25
00:01:33,210 --> 00:01:36,290
No, you're tonight's guest. You're
supposed to sing and dance.
26
00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:37,189
Oh, no.
27
00:01:37,190 --> 00:01:40,730
No way. If you invite a guest to dinner,
do you expect him to cook?
28
00:01:40,970 --> 00:01:44,150
Is that an offer? We could use a good
cook around here.
29
00:01:46,310 --> 00:01:52,150
I don't know who you are, but I love
your cooking.
30
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,320
with our very special guest star, Gene.
31
00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:09,700
Hello? He's not home.
32
00:03:22,430 --> 00:03:24,070
Incomparable, Gene Kelly.
33
00:03:25,390 --> 00:03:29,990
Yes, but first, before Gene actually
performs for us, we have a... Kermit.
34
00:03:30,970 --> 00:03:31,970
Just a second.
35
00:03:33,110 --> 00:03:34,110
What's up, Gene?
36
00:03:34,310 --> 00:03:35,470
Kermit, you don't understand.
37
00:03:35,950 --> 00:03:38,030
I'm just here to watch the show.
38
00:03:38,630 --> 00:03:43,050
You mean no singing or acting or dancing
or starring?
39
00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:45,710
No, I'm just going to be part of the
audience.
40
00:03:46,450 --> 00:03:50,350
Well, listen, let me just introduce this
number, and then we'll talk about what
41
00:03:50,350 --> 00:03:51,350
you're going to do on the show, huh?
42
00:03:51,450 --> 00:03:55,210
No. I'm just going to sit here and have
a great time.
43
00:03:58,730 --> 00:04:04,470
Okay, folks. Well, here all the way from
Baffin Bay, the Endangered Species
44
00:04:04,470 --> 00:04:05,470
Chorus Line.
45
00:04:19,170 --> 00:04:20,310
Is that Joe?
46
00:04:23,620 --> 00:04:25,020
Bye.
47
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:31,460
Bye. Bye.
48
00:04:32,420 --> 00:04:34,380
Bye. Bye.
49
00:05:25,070 --> 00:05:26,070
I love it.
50
00:05:26,990 --> 00:05:29,050
I didn't understand it, but I loved it.
51
00:05:31,910 --> 00:05:36,410
Okay, next on stage, Prince Rudolph and
his invisible cheeseburger.
52
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:38,870
Excuse me.
53
00:05:39,010 --> 00:05:42,170
Have you seen a cheeseburger waiting in
the wings?
54
00:05:42,770 --> 00:05:44,130
No. Ah, good.
55
00:05:44,610 --> 00:05:46,150
It's on time for a change.
56
00:05:47,550 --> 00:05:48,549
Hey, Bo.
57
00:05:48,550 --> 00:05:51,270
Yes? You want me to tell you what you'll
be doing in the future?
58
00:05:51,530 --> 00:05:52,690
I don't know what I'm doing.
59
00:05:55,660 --> 00:06:00,300
here in my fortune -telling cards that
for you, the Seven of Lumps is in the
60
00:06:00,300 --> 00:06:02,900
ascendancy with the beginning of the
drowning refrigerator.
61
00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:04,760
What does that mean?
62
00:06:05,220 --> 00:06:06,760
It's the end of the world.
63
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:11,020
The invisible cheeseburger has lost his
voice.
64
00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:14,320
There's nothing left of him but the
smell of onions.
65
00:06:15,860 --> 00:06:17,260
It's the end of the world.
66
00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:19,080
Well, it's not that bad.
67
00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:22,780
Everything okay so far, Gene?
68
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:27,070
Oh, come it. You don't know what a...
pleasure it is coming to a show and not
69
00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:28,070
having to perform.
70
00:06:28,670 --> 00:06:32,650
Yeah, and you don't know how hard it is
to do a show where the guest star
71
00:06:32,650 --> 00:06:33,750
doesn't perform on stage.
72
00:06:34,110 --> 00:06:35,210
Oh, relax, Kermit.
73
00:06:35,470 --> 00:06:37,090
It isn't the end of the world.
74
00:06:37,390 --> 00:06:38,450
Well, don't be too sure.
75
00:06:39,290 --> 00:06:43,390
But if you don't go on, I'll have to,
and I can't dance my way out of warm
76
00:06:43,390 --> 00:06:44,710
jello. No problem.
77
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:46,350
I used to be a dance teacher.
78
00:06:46,890 --> 00:06:49,790
What? Wait a minute. Are you offering to
give me a dance lesson?
79
00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:55,100
Of course. In a few minutes, I can have
your toes tapping or... In your case,
80
00:06:55,300 --> 00:06:56,500
your flipper's flapping.
81
00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:58,759
That's terrific.
82
00:06:58,760 --> 00:06:59,760
Hey, tell me, Gene.
83
00:07:00,140 --> 00:07:02,980
Tell me, where would you like to give me
this dance lesson?
84
00:07:03,260 --> 00:07:04,440
Oh, I don't care. Anywhere at all.
85
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:07,200
Well, how about right over here?
86
00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:11,280
Right. Now, Kermit, the first thing
you've got to remember is to figure
87
00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:20,920
Kermit,
88
00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:22,280
you tricked me.
89
00:07:22,830 --> 00:07:24,850
Uh, well, just sort of a little trick.
90
00:07:25,550 --> 00:07:26,550
Well, okay, then.
91
00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:27,969
Let's do it.
92
00:07:27,970 --> 00:07:29,270
Come on, hop up on the piano.
93
00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,230
Okay. Watch this, folks.
94
00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:32,910
Hey!
95
00:07:35,950 --> 00:07:36,869
Follow me.
96
00:07:36,870 --> 00:07:38,750
One, two, three, four.
97
00:07:39,070 --> 00:07:41,450
One, two, three, four. One, two, three.
98
00:07:41,730 --> 00:07:42,730
One, two, three.
99
00:07:42,910 --> 00:07:46,190
La, la, la, la, la, la. La, la, la, la,
la, la, la. Well, there.
100
00:07:46,610 --> 00:07:47,830
Gee, I guess I got it.
101
00:08:18,570 --> 00:08:23,310
I wish Gene Kelly would teach me to
Charleston. I wish Gene Kelly would
102
00:08:23,310 --> 00:08:24,310
you to Charleston.
103
00:08:27,610 --> 00:08:33,390
Oh, hello, boss. Hey, do you know
there's some guy who was sitting over
104
00:08:33,390 --> 00:08:34,390
watching the show?
105
00:08:34,750 --> 00:08:38,650
Oh, that's not some guy. That's Gene
Kelly, our guest star. He's one of the
106
00:08:38,650 --> 00:08:40,309
great entertainers of our age.
107
00:08:40,669 --> 00:08:41,509
Oh, good.
108
00:08:41,510 --> 00:08:42,909
I gave him my SpongeBob.
109
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,230
Well, why did you do that?
110
00:08:45,510 --> 00:08:47,350
Well, I'm giving away all my stuff.
111
00:08:47,770 --> 00:08:50,230
Because the world is coming to an end.
112
00:08:52,550 --> 00:08:54,830
Oh, that's silly.
113
00:08:55,170 --> 00:08:57,710
Oh, no, it isn't. I'm worried sick.
114
00:08:58,250 --> 00:08:59,229
Oh, good.
115
00:08:59,230 --> 00:09:01,910
Come with us. We need a sick person for
Vets Hospital.
116
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:04,310
Okay.
117
00:09:07,610 --> 00:09:10,570
Oh, Bo, thanks again for the sponge mop.
118
00:09:14,350 --> 00:09:16,910
And now, Veterinarians Hospital.
119
00:09:17,630 --> 00:09:22,730
The continuing story of a quack who's
gone to the dogs.
120
00:09:23,510 --> 00:09:25,750
So who's this patient, Nurse Janice?
121
00:09:26,090 --> 00:09:27,470
It's Bo, Dr. Bob.
122
00:09:27,830 --> 00:09:29,510
Bo, the one that lost the sheep?
123
00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:32,830
No, no, no, not Bo Peep. Bo the
stagehand.
124
00:09:33,150 --> 00:09:34,970
Oh, the one who lost his marbles.
125
00:09:36,310 --> 00:09:38,550
Hey, that's not nicey -nicey.
126
00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:41,670
No, it's not very funny -funny either.
127
00:09:42,070 --> 00:09:45,830
No, it isn't. Were you calling the
patient, stupid Dr.
128
00:09:46,050 --> 00:09:47,050
Bob?
129
00:09:50,730 --> 00:09:51,369
Stupid Dr.
130
00:09:51,370 --> 00:09:53,770
Bob. I like the first way better.
131
00:09:55,030 --> 00:09:59,770
Me too. I just came here to tell you
that the world is going to come to an
132
00:10:00,050 --> 00:10:01,050
Oh, no.
133
00:10:01,710 --> 00:10:04,910
Oh, and I had so many things I wanted to
do with my life.
134
00:10:05,310 --> 00:10:06,149
Like what?
135
00:10:06,150 --> 00:10:09,490
Well, like frizz my hair and buy some
new shoes.
136
00:10:10,430 --> 00:10:14,170
Wait a minute. Bo, how do you know the
world is going to end?
137
00:10:14,570 --> 00:10:16,370
Oh, I saw it in the cards.
138
00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:18,810
The cards. Then we got nothing to worry
about.
139
00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:21,440
He's not playing with a full deck.
140
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:26,420
There you go again, treating me like I
was subferior.
141
00:10:27,900 --> 00:10:31,980
Don't listen to him, Bo. Well, I can't
help it. He's so close, I hear every
142
00:10:31,980 --> 00:10:32,980
word.
143
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,580
I think another car just fell out of the
deck.
144
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:40,960
Okay, but the world is going to end, and
there'll be a sign.
145
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:44,140
Something will happen here that's never
happened before.
146
00:10:44,580 --> 00:10:45,740
You mean like if Dr.
147
00:10:45,980 --> 00:10:48,020
Bob actually cured a patient?
148
00:10:49,770 --> 00:10:51,670
Or Nurse Janice kept her mouth shut.
149
00:10:52,770 --> 00:10:55,110
Or if we got one honest laugh.
150
00:10:56,190 --> 00:10:59,270
Well, if the world was waiting for that,
it's going to be around a long time.
151
00:10:59,770 --> 00:11:01,310
Might as well kill the announcer.
152
00:11:01,690 --> 00:11:05,710
And so we come to the end of another
veterinarian's hospital.
153
00:11:06,270 --> 00:11:08,550
Gee, I was sure something was going to
happen.
154
00:11:09,010 --> 00:11:11,610
Tune in next week when you'll hear Dr.
Bob!
155
00:11:14,250 --> 00:11:17,770
Oh, good thing I landed on something
soft.
156
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:35,960
for love.
157
00:11:37,460 --> 00:11:39,420
Having a worry, I haven't a care.
158
00:11:39,620 --> 00:11:41,660
Feel like a feather, they're floating on
air.
159
00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:44,380
Fiddle, fiddle, and ready for love.
160
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:49,820
Soon the church bells will be ringing,
and the march is mine to paw.
161
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:54,460
Now the church bells will be ringing,
with a hey, nonny, nonny, and a ha, cha,
162
00:11:54,520 --> 00:11:56,960
cha. My dinner little, my baby's okay.
163
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,240
Ask me a riddle, what did she say?
164
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,059
Look at that.
165
00:12:25,060 --> 00:12:26,980
All that and she can dance too.
166
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,480
The church bells will be ringing, and
the march will be on the path.
167
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:02,660
The church bells will be ringing, with a
nonny nonny and a hot cha cha.
168
00:13:02,940 --> 00:13:04,600
I hear a little, my baby's okay.
169
00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:06,640
Asked me a little, what did she say?
170
00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,040
But as a fiddle and ready for love.
171
00:13:26,990 --> 00:13:29,910
Oh, hi, Miss Piggy. I was just standing
here getting some fresh air.
172
00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:32,270
Oh, I thought you were grabbing a taxi.
173
00:13:32,470 --> 00:13:34,930
Oh, no, I don't want to leave. I'm
having too much fun.
174
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:35,989
Oh, good.
175
00:13:35,990 --> 00:13:37,610
And you're doing a wonderful job.
176
00:13:37,970 --> 00:13:39,010
Oh, I'm not doing anything.
177
00:13:40,130 --> 00:13:41,250
You're doing it so well.
178
00:13:42,250 --> 00:13:43,129
Thank you.
179
00:13:43,130 --> 00:13:46,890
Eugene, you have sung to many beautiful
women.
180
00:13:47,430 --> 00:13:48,710
Yes, yes, I've been lucky.
181
00:13:49,550 --> 00:13:50,870
Your luck's still with you.
182
00:13:51,110 --> 00:13:52,110
It is.
183
00:13:58,510 --> 00:13:59,530
I'd be happy to.
184
00:14:02,650 --> 00:14:09,150
I'm glad I met you, you wonderful you.
185
00:15:16,270 --> 00:15:17,550
I don't think it'll be the same.
186
00:16:02,540 --> 00:16:03,640
was about to speak.
187
00:16:03,980 --> 00:16:08,500
Oh, I wonder how that announcer is. He
fell down in Fitzhospital, you know.
188
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:11,300
Actually, I sprained my ankle.
189
00:16:12,380 --> 00:16:15,340
Well, take my advice and get your mommy
to kiss it.
190
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,160
Can we get on with this sketch?
191
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:21,060
Yeah, yeah, good idea.
192
00:16:21,340 --> 00:16:26,740
Captain Hogthrob, the navigational
computer just gave us a very startling
193
00:16:27,060 --> 00:16:28,060
Oh, what's that?
194
00:16:54,250 --> 00:16:55,570
I just love presents.
195
00:16:57,070 --> 00:17:01,810
In exactly one minute from now.
196
00:17:13,650 --> 00:17:16,130
It's okay, it's okay. It's just the
dinner gone.
197
00:17:16,490 --> 00:17:17,490
Oh, God.
198
00:17:17,990 --> 00:17:20,829
That means I'm going to miss the meaning
and purpose of life.
199
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:07,440
The meaning and purpose of life has just
been announced.
200
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:35,160
Any more coffee?
201
00:18:37,260 --> 00:18:41,240
Too bad we all missed the meaning and
purpose of life.
202
00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:43,860
Not all of us missed it.
203
00:19:13,070 --> 00:19:14,290
use a jug band number tonight.
204
00:19:14,530 --> 00:19:15,530
Aw, man, it's unfair.
205
00:19:16,250 --> 00:19:19,350
Oh, come on, Zeke. It ain't the end of
the world.
206
00:19:19,650 --> 00:19:20,650
Yes, it is.
207
00:19:20,890 --> 00:19:24,310
The universe ended in pigs in space and
the world must be next.
208
00:19:24,670 --> 00:19:25,910
It's just a sketch, though.
209
00:19:26,210 --> 00:19:30,770
Hey, Kermit, the set's on stage and
ready to go. Let me see. Yeah, it looks
210
00:19:30,770 --> 00:19:33,890
like the set from the movie, doesn't it?
Wow, an exact duplicate.
211
00:19:34,210 --> 00:19:37,290
Is Gene excited about doing Singing in
the Rain on the show?
212
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:39,110
Well, he doesn't know about it yet.
213
00:19:42,860 --> 00:19:44,540
Oh, it's our surprise closing number,
Gene.
214
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:49,380
Well, I hope it's not for me. I don't
want to do anything more. I just came
215
00:19:49,380 --> 00:19:51,620
to enjoy myself, sit down, and relax.
216
00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:55,560
Not even something like all singing in
the rain, possibly?
217
00:19:55,940 --> 00:20:00,200
Especially not that number. You know,
I've done that number so much people are
218
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,600
tired of it. But, Gene, that's exactly
what we thought.
219
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,320
Gene's not going to want to do singing
in the rain, we said. Didn't we,
220
00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:09,860
Yeah, that's what we said, I guess.
221
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:11,640
Maybe I wasn't listening to us.
222
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:16,540
Listen, Scooter, since the Jug Band set
is on stage right now, we have a Jug
223
00:20:16,540 --> 00:20:19,680
Band on the show, Gene. A Jug Band.
Yeah. Why don't you go tell a Jug Band
224
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:20,680
their number is next?
225
00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,060
Oh, right. Yeah, right.
226
00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:24,860
I'll tell the Jug Band. Oh, they'll sure
be pleased with their set.
227
00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:29,140
Gene, I just have one quick introduction
to make.
228
00:20:29,660 --> 00:20:32,640
Good. I'll just go over here and sit
down and relax, okay?
229
00:20:36,120 --> 00:20:37,120
Well,
230
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:41,980
welcome, if you will, that Texas Jug
Band extraordinaire.
231
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,720
Lubbock Lou and his jug huggers.
232
00:21:28,170 --> 00:21:30,350
hoping that I do Singing in the Rain,
all right?
233
00:21:30,650 --> 00:21:34,430
Oh, no, no, absolutely not. The thought
never crossed my mind.
234
00:21:35,110 --> 00:21:36,950
Or to put it another way, yes.
235
00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:38,830
I guess.
236
00:21:39,510 --> 00:21:41,110
Well, I understand.
237
00:21:41,350 --> 00:21:46,750
I mean, it's a great song, but after I
did it in the movie, Kermit, I used to
238
00:21:46,750 --> 00:21:47,750
it all the time.
239
00:21:48,070 --> 00:21:49,550
I'd do it at the drop of a hat.
240
00:21:52,690 --> 00:21:54,790
And no more.
241
00:21:55,310 --> 00:21:56,310
You see,
242
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,880
that I'd never be able to do it better
than we did it in the movie.
243
00:22:01,140 --> 00:22:03,380
So that's why I never sing it anymore.
244
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:07,820
Yeah, but Gene, doesn't this vamp I'm
playing make you kind of feel like
245
00:22:07,820 --> 00:22:08,820
singing?
246
00:22:09,060 --> 00:22:10,280
Yeah, that vamp does.
247
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:42,400
I know that one sure.
248
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:44,720
You...
249
00:23:15,980 --> 00:23:16,980
It sure does.
250
00:23:17,260 --> 00:23:18,260
And you know something?
251
00:23:18,340 --> 00:23:20,260
It even goes with this one, too.
252
00:23:25,740 --> 00:23:30,520
I'm singing in the rain.
253
00:23:32,260 --> 00:23:36,640
Just singing in the rain.
254
00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:41,820
What a glorious feeling.
255
00:23:46,860 --> 00:23:53,400
again I'll walk down the lane with a
256
00:23:53,400 --> 00:24:00,040
happy refrain just singing and dancing
257
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:01,960
in
258
00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:52,180
Okay, and so we come to the end of
another one. But before we go, let us
259
00:24:52,180 --> 00:24:56,040
back the man who's made this evening so
very special for all of us. Ladies and
260
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:57,220
gentlemen, Mr. Gene Cowan.
261
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:05,920
Herbert, I've had a wonderful time.
262
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:09,280
How can you say that? The world is
coming to an end.
263
00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:14,280
You know, Beauregard, I have been
reading the instruction manual for those
264
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:15,420
fortune -telling cards.
265
00:25:15,820 --> 00:25:16,860
Scooter made a mistake.
266
00:25:17,360 --> 00:25:23,140
Oh? Yes, it says here, when the seven of
lumps is in the ascendancy with the
267
00:25:23,140 --> 00:25:27,780
beginning of the drowning refrigerator.
It doesn't mean the world is ending. It
268
00:25:27,780 --> 00:25:31,140
means your laundry will come back gray
and dingy.
269
00:25:32,620 --> 00:25:37,400
You're trying to make me feel better,
but I know the end is near.
270
00:25:37,780 --> 00:25:39,020
No, the end is now.
271
00:25:39,260 --> 00:25:40,980
We'll see you next time on The Muppet
Show.
272
00:26:19,340 --> 00:26:20,760
Are you ready for the end of the world?
273
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,040
Sure, it couldn't be worse than this, y
'all.
21471
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.