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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:03,040 They want the CIC. 2 00:00:03,740 --> 00:00:04,740 Oh, God. 3 00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:08,960 I sell a bad bitch, do whatever I say. 4 00:00:09,320 --> 00:00:14,280 Ain't nobody f***ing with my clique, clique, clique, clique. This past year 5 00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:19,140 been unbelievable for me. I dropped a hit comedy DVD entitled Laugh At My 6 00:00:19,700 --> 00:00:21,720 All right, all right, all right. 7 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:26,480 I've been selling out arenas all over the world, from London to Tokyo. 8 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:29,220 Do y 'all know how they say all right, all right, all right in Japanese? 9 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,020 Me either, but I know the difference. 10 00:00:31,340 --> 00:00:34,820 My movie, Think Like a Man, that tore up the box office. 11 00:00:35,220 --> 00:00:36,220 Number one, baby. 12 00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:40,940 I hosted the VMAs. I even beat out Denzel for the BET Best Actor Award. 13 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:42,240 Yeah, then. 14 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:48,400 Nothing can erase the smile off my face. 15 00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:50,860 Because right now, I am this. 16 00:01:30,120 --> 00:01:33,660 You know, before my daddy got on drugs, he once told me that for every boss, 17 00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:35,280 there's a hundred wannabe bosses. 18 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:39,220 I had no idea that those wannabe bosses would be my boys. I guess that's what 19 00:01:39,220 --> 00:01:40,220 happens when you're on top. 20 00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:44,980 Welcome to my world, baby. 21 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:49,420 I'm talking about real life, real stories. Here I go. Real husbands of 22 00:01:49,420 --> 00:01:50,500 Hollywood. Oh, they went on the grass. 23 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:52,200 No, I got you, man. Take your time, dude. 24 00:01:52,740 --> 00:01:54,900 Hey, stay in school. It's the best choice for you. 25 00:01:55,620 --> 00:01:57,060 Olive, I'm not signing them on the grass. 26 00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:58,480 What's up? 27 00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:11,120 Hey, Jay. Good to see you, dude. Look at you, boy. Funniest man in America. 28 00:02:14,260 --> 00:02:15,260 Stand in there! 29 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:23,480 Hold up. Wait a minute. Look at Boris. 30 00:02:23,740 --> 00:02:25,080 I'm in it. Hey! 31 00:02:25,300 --> 00:02:29,660 Hey, look at you, man. You look good, brother. I'm about to look as good as 32 00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:30,619 do. 33 00:02:30,620 --> 00:02:31,700 No, you won't. 34 00:02:34,820 --> 00:02:36,360 Hey, Oliver, give him a picture, man. 35 00:02:36,670 --> 00:02:37,670 I don't need a picture, Oliver. 36 00:02:38,310 --> 00:02:39,510 Here comes the train. 37 00:02:39,710 --> 00:02:40,709 Jump on the train. 38 00:02:40,710 --> 00:02:41,709 What's up, dog? 39 00:02:41,710 --> 00:02:45,530 Stop you right there. Oh, wow. Come on now. That's a dope watch. You saw that? 40 00:02:45,710 --> 00:02:48,610 Only the good know what I'm wearing right now. Which one is that? Oh, come 41 00:02:48,650 --> 00:02:49,790 man. This is an Omar Patel. 42 00:02:50,150 --> 00:02:51,150 Hey, 43 00:02:51,610 --> 00:02:52,610 I can't stay that long. 44 00:02:52,830 --> 00:02:53,830 Time is money. 45 00:02:53,970 --> 00:02:57,630 Got to go, baby. Hey, Oliver, make sure you get a picture. Good to see you, cab. 46 00:02:58,810 --> 00:02:59,810 Watch is fake. 47 00:03:03,990 --> 00:03:05,030 Excuse me, people. 48 00:03:06,330 --> 00:03:07,330 Step aside. 49 00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,530 Mommy, I get to hear boobies. 50 00:03:14,010 --> 00:03:15,010 Oliver, get him out of here. 51 00:03:15,290 --> 00:03:17,810 Get him out of here. You got a code one. Okay, cover your cheeks. Get him out of 52 00:03:17,810 --> 00:03:19,390 here. Come with me. Get him out of here. Cover your cheeks. 53 00:03:22,690 --> 00:03:24,570 Can you get a balloon hat, little boy? 54 00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:25,830 What? There you go. 55 00:03:26,710 --> 00:03:29,370 Up top. What's a fake Jonah Hill looking ass up out of here, man? 56 00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:31,910 Get off. 57 00:03:32,910 --> 00:03:33,709 Come on. 58 00:03:33,710 --> 00:03:34,830 What is wrong with this dude? 59 00:03:35,609 --> 00:03:38,850 When they called me and told me to bring my babies to a little get -together, 60 00:03:38,950 --> 00:03:42,830 Nick, I thought he was talking about my other babies. 61 00:03:44,250 --> 00:03:46,270 Yeah, that's the biggest laugh you done got all year. 62 00:03:46,490 --> 00:03:49,150 Oh, that's funny, Nick. Why the hell did you tell me this was a kid's party? 63 00:03:49,410 --> 00:03:52,090 I did, and apparently your kids got ass. 64 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:54,870 Well, you are something else. 65 00:03:55,590 --> 00:03:56,590 What the hell is Mariah? 66 00:03:57,190 --> 00:03:59,010 Why do you always hire Mariah when I come around? 67 00:03:59,910 --> 00:04:03,150 I don't. She hides herself from your gremlin -looking ass. 68 00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:06,110 She's just mad because Mimi loves herself some Kevin. 69 00:04:06,510 --> 00:04:08,530 That's right. She loves this little dim sum cat. 70 00:04:08,750 --> 00:04:10,170 That's what she does? You know she does. 71 00:04:10,490 --> 00:04:12,150 When she get this house? I know she had this house. 72 00:04:13,470 --> 00:04:17,430 First off, this is my house. I bought this house before I got married to 73 00:04:18,209 --> 00:04:19,589 That's funny because I just bought a house, too. 74 00:04:19,810 --> 00:04:20,890 And it's way bigger than this. 75 00:04:21,110 --> 00:04:22,550 That's why I was hoping this wasn't Mariah's house. 76 00:04:22,790 --> 00:04:25,590 You're crazy. Your house ain't bigger than this. No, my house is bigger than 77 00:04:25,590 --> 00:04:28,990 this. I'm killing this house. Let me tell you something. If I gave you a tour 78 00:04:28,990 --> 00:04:29,990 my house, it would look like this. 79 00:04:31,159 --> 00:04:32,420 Kitchen. Living room. 80 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:33,920 Nick's house. 81 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,400 Bathroom. 82 00:04:36,260 --> 00:04:38,400 That's almost funny. But you're lying. 83 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:41,660 Because I sold you your damn house. No, you didn't. You didn't sell me my house. 84 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:46,300 I got my house from Incredible Real Estate. 85 00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:50,400 Weenie? 86 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:55,500 I don't want no damn weenie. 87 00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,900 Stop it. You better stop it. 88 00:04:58,280 --> 00:05:00,280 You better get it out of my face. I'm so sick. 89 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,000 I'm so sick. 90 00:05:03,580 --> 00:05:07,480 You can't see that. 91 00:05:08,580 --> 00:05:09,559 Are you serious? 92 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:10,560 I'm so sick. 93 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:13,000 Yo, man, you should really get one of those trucks. 94 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:17,320 There's money in those trucks. People love eating bad food off those things. 95 00:05:17,580 --> 00:05:20,700 JB, JB, forget about those trucks. I got something better for you to invest your 96 00:05:20,700 --> 00:05:21,860 money in. Shut up, Jake. 97 00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:24,910 I was talking about investing your money. I just started making money. Why 98 00:05:24,910 --> 00:05:25,910 hell would I give my money to you? 99 00:05:26,190 --> 00:05:29,690 Exactly. Shoot, I'm still looking for my money from that five -star hotel in 100 00:05:29,690 --> 00:05:33,750 Haiti. Okay, Nick, now you know we would have been sitting on gold if Wyclef 101 00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:34,750 would have won. 102 00:05:35,090 --> 00:05:39,530 Hold on a second. You mean to tell me that the entire investment hinges on a 103 00:05:39,530 --> 00:05:40,910 rapper being elected for president? 104 00:05:41,290 --> 00:05:42,850 You just shut the Fuji up. 105 00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:44,490 Wait, dude, you don't make any sense. 106 00:05:44,990 --> 00:05:45,990 Makes sense to me. 107 00:05:46,470 --> 00:05:47,470 Thank you, Nelly. 108 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,700 What the hell is she doing? Damn, Tiffany, what did you do? 109 00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:01,240 Tiffany, what the hell is going on? You're supposed to be watching my kids. 110 00:06:01,620 --> 00:06:04,160 Where the hell are my kids at? With the babysitter, why? 111 00:06:05,660 --> 00:06:06,900 You're the babysitter, Tiffany. 112 00:06:08,420 --> 00:06:10,060 Actually, I'm the nanny. 113 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:11,540 Kevin didn't hire me. 114 00:06:11,780 --> 00:06:14,920 His ex -wife, my cousin, Bridget did. 115 00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:19,360 So really, I'm a thot. A hood thot. 116 00:06:21,060 --> 00:06:22,100 I'll take it from here. 117 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,720 Okay, and I'll take my $100. He'll take your $100. 118 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:29,000 Okay, I'll take the $100 and give it to the babysitter. I am the babysitter. The 119 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,060 kid's at the pool, stupid. 120 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:31,480 The kid's in the pool? 121 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:32,560 Mm -hmm. 122 00:06:32,940 --> 00:06:33,980 What the hell is going on, Shay? 123 00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:35,139 Look here. 124 00:06:35,140 --> 00:06:39,380 I knew it. Look, guys, what would you do if somebody put nasty stains on your 125 00:06:39,380 --> 00:06:40,219 brand -new suit? 126 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:42,080 Look like a fool? Cup soda. Throw it away. 127 00:06:42,380 --> 00:06:45,600 Tell the maid. Tell no damn maid. You put Robitussin on it. Everybody knows 128 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,580 that. Okay, listen. What if you could do this? 129 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:50,160 Huh? Or this? 130 00:06:51,460 --> 00:06:53,910 Huh? Or this? This is bad quality, dude. 131 00:06:56,110 --> 00:06:58,550 That's not a breakaway suit, is it? Yes, it is. Damn it, Jake. 132 00:06:59,850 --> 00:07:01,810 I've been trying to find a breakaway suit forever. 133 00:07:02,170 --> 00:07:03,170 You want to do the honors? 134 00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:08,150 Why? Tell me why. 135 00:07:08,590 --> 00:07:11,310 Why? Man, that's a six -piece suit right there. 136 00:07:11,790 --> 00:07:14,170 One, two, three, four, five, six. 137 00:07:14,510 --> 00:07:19,110 That's six damn pieces. I present to you the latest in affordable couture, 138 00:07:19,170 --> 00:07:20,250 breakaway. 139 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:24,580 I like it. You guys are deceiving me. This is a can't -miss investment. 140 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:26,320 Everybody calm down. Let me check it. You got me. 141 00:07:26,700 --> 00:07:27,699 Let me see this. 142 00:07:27,700 --> 00:07:29,600 This is not bad at all. 143 00:07:29,860 --> 00:07:34,800 This is almost as nice as my Alpha Custom clothing company, available at 144 00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:35,800 worldofalpha .com. 145 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:39,320 What? Huh? You just plugged that? That's what you just did? Huh? What do you 146 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:40,319 think? It's dumb! 147 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:44,060 Listen, guys, that's not even the best part. This suit's only $99. 148 00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:48,200 A good quality breakaway suit for $99? I think not. 149 00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:53,860 If I went to that factory, I bet I see little Malaysian kids naked sewing those 150 00:07:53,860 --> 00:07:54,880 suits together with their teeth. 151 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:57,920 What do you think? I think you should pick the pieces up to your suit and get 152 00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:58,920 the hell out of here. 153 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:00,240 Transform back. 154 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,580 This is the life of Hollywood. 155 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:15,100 Hey, hey, hey. Who made these nasty -ass pies, man? 156 00:08:15,340 --> 00:08:17,500 Hey, chill, chill, man. Those pies need to go in the trash. 157 00:08:17,840 --> 00:08:20,360 My brother's son Calvin made that. 158 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,720 Okay, well, maybe I'm tripping. Maybe my taste buds are off. 159 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:25,820 No, no. Mm -mm. No. 160 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:28,480 No. This pie's nasty. This pie's nasty. 161 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:30,440 He's right behind you, Kevin. 162 00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:33,620 Well, maybe I need to turn around and tell Mr. Nasty Pie hello. 163 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:36,620 Oh, hey, Fat Jesus. 164 00:08:36,919 --> 00:08:37,819 Let me tell you something. 165 00:08:37,820 --> 00:08:40,059 Wow. This pie ain't shit. You hear me? 166 00:08:40,730 --> 00:08:43,270 Not good at all. I hate you, Kevin Hart. That's a strong word. 167 00:08:46,030 --> 00:08:46,789 That's right. 168 00:08:46,790 --> 00:08:47,790 I can't believe that. 169 00:08:49,310 --> 00:08:50,750 Pudgy kid kicked me. 170 00:08:51,510 --> 00:08:54,290 How the hell he find my nuts? He can't even find his own yet. 171 00:08:54,610 --> 00:08:55,650 There you go. 172 00:08:56,730 --> 00:08:57,750 See what you did? 173 00:08:59,030 --> 00:09:00,030 Saw that coming. 174 00:09:01,690 --> 00:09:02,750 Nick, it's on now. 175 00:09:02,970 --> 00:09:06,570 Let it go, Kev. No, he don't let it go. Kev, let it go. He don't let it go. Say 176 00:09:06,570 --> 00:09:07,539 something, Nick. 177 00:09:07,540 --> 00:09:10,500 I'm about to put the paws on this little boy, Nick. He's eight years old. I 178 00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:11,500 don't give a shit. 179 00:09:11,540 --> 00:09:13,500 Let me tell you something. You've grown enough to hit a man. 180 00:09:13,700 --> 00:09:15,540 You've grown enough to get handled. You hear me? 181 00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:19,280 I'm about to put the paws on him. Let me tell you something, Calvin. You got one 182 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:22,140 more time to do something crazy, boy, before you get the paws. 183 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:28,480 Don't let up on me. 184 00:09:28,740 --> 00:09:30,160 Don't let up. Don't let up. 185 00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:32,040 Don't let up. 186 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:43,520 There's two things all cannon men can do. We can bake and we can fight. We 187 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:45,360 in the kitchen and in the ring. 188 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:49,520 After 189 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:59,980 recovering 190 00:09:59,980 --> 00:10:04,660 from that attack by Nick and that 11 -year -old Rottweiler, I decided to call 191 00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,280 bigger dog, my attorney. 192 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:08,560 The big he is what I call her. 193 00:10:09,180 --> 00:10:10,180 Trina Shaw. 194 00:10:10,460 --> 00:10:13,660 Sue him? You cannot sue an 11 -year -old boy, Kevin. 195 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:16,980 You have no idea what this boy did to me. He put the paws on me. 196 00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:19,680 That's not how I heard it happen. He kicked me in my baby stuff. 197 00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:24,820 I can't have kids. I'm suing. I already spoke with Nick, and he has agreed to 198 00:10:24,820 --> 00:10:25,900 not press charges. 199 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:29,460 What do you mean Nick told you that he would not press charges? He's being very 200 00:10:29,460 --> 00:10:31,840 reasonable. Why is my attorney talking to Nick? 201 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:34,180 Because I am also his attorney. 202 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:35,800 Because you're... 203 00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:37,620 You're sleeping with the enemy, Trina? 204 00:10:37,940 --> 00:10:41,380 Let's watch our verbiage, okay? Because as we've discussed, I do not sleep with 205 00:10:41,380 --> 00:10:42,620 any of my clients, okay? 206 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:43,880 Not even Boris. 207 00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:45,560 Not even Boris? 208 00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:48,540 Oh, this is bad. 209 00:10:49,060 --> 00:10:50,080 Who else do you represent? 210 00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:53,880 I represent a lot of people. No, no, let's get the names. 211 00:10:55,000 --> 00:11:00,660 Okay. Who else? Okay, fine. Besides Nick, JB, Dwayne, Tisha, Nicole, 212 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,100 Nelly. 213 00:11:03,100 --> 00:11:06,220 They're my friends. That's how you want to look at it. I can't believe it. 214 00:11:07,060 --> 00:11:10,080 Well, I think the one thing that we know is that I'm the most successful client 215 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:10,979 you have. 216 00:11:10,980 --> 00:11:12,820 Well, no, that would be DiCaprio. 217 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:16,380 You represent white people? 218 00:11:17,540 --> 00:11:19,860 It's the only way I can afford to represent you, Kevin. 219 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:21,840 You're on the other side. 220 00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:25,220 What other side? What are you talking about? What is the other side? Do you 221 00:11:25,220 --> 00:11:27,340 who you're talking to? It's not the other side for me, actually. 222 00:11:28,260 --> 00:11:30,700 I'm saying, you know, it's kind of like me. You know, half my clients are white, 223 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,720 half my clients are black. You know what I'm saying? You're half white? 224 00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:37,320 Oh, certain things we just... We just don't mention when the contract is 225 00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:41,160 being... What? That I represent people other than you? The thing that you need 226 00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:44,180 to know now is that I have a cold case on my hands. 227 00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:47,880 A case? A cold case. Against an 11 -year -old? Do you ever watch the first 48? 228 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,400 A middle schooler. This is the type of stuff that happens... A tween. Have you 229 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:53,020 seen him? He could work for Disney. 230 00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:54,800 I'm going to take him for everything he has. 231 00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:58,580 That little easy -baked oven that he has? That he cooked those nasty -ass 232 00:11:58,580 --> 00:12:01,560 in? That's why the pies was cold in the middle. Because the easy -baked oven 233 00:12:01,560 --> 00:12:03,040 light bulb is strong enough to cook it. 234 00:12:03,470 --> 00:12:05,010 But he would know that because he's a little boy. 235 00:12:05,430 --> 00:12:06,409 I'm a man. 236 00:12:06,410 --> 00:12:07,790 I'm smart enough to see these things. 237 00:12:08,010 --> 00:12:08,829 Let's say that again. 238 00:12:08,830 --> 00:12:09,830 Say what again? Because he's a what? 239 00:12:10,090 --> 00:12:11,230 Because he's a fat boy. 240 00:12:11,930 --> 00:12:13,350 And I'm suing Nick. 241 00:12:13,570 --> 00:12:14,329 That's right. 242 00:12:14,330 --> 00:12:15,750 Nick is going down too. 243 00:12:15,990 --> 00:12:18,650 Because he sold me a house that I didn't know I was buying from him. 244 00:12:19,170 --> 00:12:20,630 Illegal. I knew. 245 00:12:22,350 --> 00:12:23,350 Consider me gone. 246 00:12:28,690 --> 00:12:31,830 Me and my friends get together at my house once a week to play a little 247 00:12:32,330 --> 00:12:33,330 Why my house? 248 00:12:33,490 --> 00:12:36,230 Because ever since my divorce, my house is a white free zone. 249 00:12:37,350 --> 00:12:40,490 So that doesn't bother you that we had the same lawyer? Why? It bothers nobody. 250 00:12:40,770 --> 00:12:42,490 No, not me at all. What do you mean? 251 00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:46,170 I'm not going to sue you. If you were to sue me. Why would I sue you? 252 00:12:46,490 --> 00:12:49,390 But if you did, she would have to make a choice. Look, if we got a problem, 253 00:12:49,530 --> 00:12:52,810 we're supposed to work this out right here. I threw anybody's ass. I don't 254 00:12:52,810 --> 00:12:53,990 a damn about y 'all. 255 00:12:54,270 --> 00:12:56,550 Who would have a problem with who, Kevin? We're all friends. 256 00:12:56,770 --> 00:12:58,030 What's the big deal? It's not about being friends. 257 00:12:58,270 --> 00:12:59,410 It's about needing legal help. 258 00:12:59,810 --> 00:13:00,589 I'm here. 259 00:13:00,590 --> 00:13:01,630 What up, boy? Yeah. 260 00:13:01,910 --> 00:13:02,910 Woo! 261 00:13:03,410 --> 00:13:04,990 Look at that. Look at that. What are you doing? 262 00:13:06,430 --> 00:13:09,250 See, I told you I'm not investing in that little suit thing, man. I don't 263 00:13:09,250 --> 00:13:12,610 no parts of it, Dwayne. It's yours, okay? I had it custom made for you. And 264 00:13:12,610 --> 00:13:14,610 know it fit because I had my son try it on. Give me the suit. 265 00:13:16,020 --> 00:13:17,020 Shake. Seriously. 266 00:13:17,580 --> 00:13:21,620 That's some talk for a guy who got his ass whooped by an 11 -year -old boy. 267 00:13:21,940 --> 00:13:23,740 He told me he was nine years old. 268 00:13:23,980 --> 00:13:27,460 He was a big nine. Yeah, Kevin, but he whooped your ass over a piece of pie. 269 00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:28,540 That was a piece of cake, Kevin. 270 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:30,720 That pie was good. 271 00:13:30,900 --> 00:13:33,580 Will y 'all stop talking about the pie, man? It's about what happened. 272 00:13:34,260 --> 00:13:36,080 Y 'all a bunch of Mitches sometimes. 273 00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:37,600 A what? 274 00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:40,400 Fellas, a Mitch is a man that acts like a bitch. 275 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,200 You know what I'm talking about. 276 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:43,620 You all know at least one. 277 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:45,900 If you don't know one, then you're the Mitch. 278 00:13:47,940 --> 00:13:48,940 Burn a turn. 279 00:13:49,880 --> 00:13:52,600 Boom. I'm going to check, too. On you, JB. 280 00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:53,840 Who's in the driveway? 281 00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:54,960 What? 282 00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:57,020 Yo, who the hell is that in my driveway? 283 00:13:58,260 --> 00:13:59,260 Who's that? 284 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,920 That's Robin Thicke. Why is Robin Thicke in my driveway? 285 00:14:02,420 --> 00:14:03,660 I invited Robin. 286 00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,540 I mean, we needed somebody to lose, kick Nick out. 287 00:14:07,219 --> 00:14:10,140 Didn't I tell you that's why we invited JB? No, no, no, no, no. You said that's 288 00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:11,140 why we invited him. Boris asked. 289 00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:14,040 I thought it was Dwayne. You told me that hustle money can't win, so that's 290 00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:15,140 you invited Nelly. It doesn't matter. 291 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:16,760 It's not about who's here to lose. 292 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,420 It's about the fact you're inviting strangers to my house, man. 293 00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:23,680 I don't want strange people pulling up in my... Whoa. 294 00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:25,420 Is that the girl from Mission Impossible? 295 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:29,400 Yep, that's Robin's wife, Paula Patton. 296 00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:30,700 Yo! 297 00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,500 Paula Patton's in my driveway! 298 00:14:32,840 --> 00:14:33,860 I'm about to bag it. 299 00:14:35,410 --> 00:14:37,050 What is wrong with him? I don't know. 300 00:14:37,470 --> 00:14:38,470 Paula Patton? 301 00:14:38,750 --> 00:14:40,650 Oh, see, they don't understand. 302 00:14:41,030 --> 00:14:45,370 I said I was never going to get married again unless it was to Paula Patton or 303 00:14:45,370 --> 00:14:47,370 unless it was to Mariah after she dumped Nick. 304 00:14:48,190 --> 00:14:49,750 Or wait a minute. No, I said Nicole too. 305 00:14:50,210 --> 00:14:51,210 Nicole's in there. 306 00:14:51,330 --> 00:14:52,330 And Tisha. 307 00:14:52,610 --> 00:14:54,430 Wait a minute. No, no, no, no, no. Take Tisha out. 308 00:14:54,750 --> 00:14:56,030 Because Tisha has a crush on me. 309 00:14:56,650 --> 00:14:57,830 She wants me bad. 310 00:14:58,190 --> 00:14:59,730 So that's different. 311 00:14:59,950 --> 00:15:00,950 I'm like, get away. 312 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:09,620 I think I like her. She got a... She ain't a good queen. 313 00:15:09,820 --> 00:15:12,520 Hey, Kevin, how you doing? Robin Thicke. This ain't the time. 314 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:14,480 Hey! Paula! 315 00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:16,700 Paula! Paula, no! 316 00:15:16,940 --> 00:15:17,940 No! 317 00:15:18,380 --> 00:15:19,920 Dang it! 318 00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:21,860 Why would you go that fast? 319 00:15:22,720 --> 00:15:24,060 She drives fast, man. 320 00:15:24,540 --> 00:15:25,540 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! 321 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:26,800 Where you going? 322 00:15:27,500 --> 00:15:30,860 I'm here to play poker. Nelly invited me. Nelly? I don't even know Nelly's 323 00:15:30,860 --> 00:15:32,340 name, so I don't know why you would take that invite. 324 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,660 Oh, you guys already have a full table, right? 325 00:15:35,160 --> 00:15:36,160 No, no, no. 326 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:37,640 This is my home. 327 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:38,519 That's why. 328 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:41,400 People don't just show up at my house, man. So get your ride. 329 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:46,240 That's your ride? Is she coming back to get you? Yeah, of course. 330 00:15:46,540 --> 00:15:48,180 Dude, what took you so damn long? 331 00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,120 We've been waiting all day. 332 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:53,400 I got chicken and wings. Hey, Robin's here. Hey, guys. 333 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:56,820 You see how she didn't look back when she drove off? 334 00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:59,080 That patent is still pending. 335 00:16:01,260 --> 00:16:06,180 So my snowboard hits a rock, and then I go flying through the air. I hit a 336 00:16:06,180 --> 00:16:09,700 cabin. By the time I wake up, Mick Jagger is giving me hot chocolate. What? 337 00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:13,920 way. Spiked with cognac, yeah. That's crazy. The French house. You never know 338 00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:14,859 what's going to happen. 339 00:16:14,860 --> 00:16:15,940 That's crazy. Really? 340 00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:17,720 Mick Jagger? 341 00:16:18,180 --> 00:16:21,660 Yeah, that's great. How old is he now? What is he, a day and a half? 342 00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,820 What does that mean, man? What do you mean? to me? Is it me? I'm tired of 343 00:16:25,820 --> 00:16:28,400 sitting here listening to him drop a bunch of old has -been names. 344 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:30,460 That's a good story, man. That's a great story. 345 00:16:30,900 --> 00:16:33,020 That's a hell of a story. I don't want to talk about that. Why don't we talk 346 00:16:33,020 --> 00:16:37,560 about how outdated his hair is? Whoa, come on, Kevin. This is my friend. 347 00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:40,380 There's no reason to keep disrespecting him like that. 348 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:43,200 No, but don't worry about it, Nelly. You know what? That's pretty funny, Kevin. 349 00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:45,520 You should do stand -up. I should do stand -up? 350 00:16:45,860 --> 00:16:49,200 Uh, you know I do stand -up. And you know I'm one of the best at it. 351 00:16:49,460 --> 00:16:50,339 Second best. 352 00:16:50,340 --> 00:16:51,340 Second best to who? 353 00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:52,440 Second best to me. 354 00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:56,040 You a damn liar. I'm the first best and you know it. You stole all my jokes. 355 00:16:56,620 --> 00:17:00,800 Ew! JB, ain't nobody stealing your spitting ass jokes. You stole my pickle 356 00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:04,220 I've been doing that pickle joke for years. That was my pickle joke first. 357 00:17:04,220 --> 00:17:04,779 up, JB. 358 00:17:04,780 --> 00:17:07,780 Okay, the joke go like this. All right, I put it on my pants. You go like, ew, 359 00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:09,680 look at your pickle. I go, what's the deal? 360 00:17:10,359 --> 00:17:11,359 Hmm? 361 00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:16,339 Whatever, man. Play the game. It's on you, Robin. 362 00:17:16,819 --> 00:17:17,819 Sorry, guys. 363 00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:18,819 Olsen twins. 364 00:17:18,859 --> 00:17:19,479 Full house. 365 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:22,599 I don't know what it is tonight. I just can't lose. What does he have? I feel 366 00:17:22,599 --> 00:17:24,760 bad because I think I should give you guys your money back. 367 00:17:24,980 --> 00:17:26,119 I mean, this is getting ridiculous. 368 00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:28,700 Where's Ferris Square? You take all the money. That's you. Nope. 369 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:30,219 That's not true. 370 00:17:30,220 --> 00:17:31,880 Stop that, Kevin! 371 00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:33,740 Sit your blackjack ass down! 372 00:17:34,460 --> 00:17:35,560 He wants Ferris Square! 373 00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:38,360 This is my friend here! 374 00:17:38,900 --> 00:17:40,460 Thank you, Nelly. 375 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:41,720 What's wrong with you, man? 376 00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:42,880 I gotta get my cut. 377 00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:43,859 What cut? 378 00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:45,360 Buffalo wings, pizza, soda, beer. 379 00:17:47,319 --> 00:17:48,680 Oh, there's a card right there. 380 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:50,080 Stop lying. 381 00:17:50,660 --> 00:17:52,280 Acting like you know all these famous people. 382 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:53,960 You don't know Rick Jagger. 383 00:17:54,820 --> 00:17:56,520 You're going to give us the money back. 384 00:17:56,900 --> 00:17:58,240 Who do you think you are, Robin Hood? 385 00:17:58,860 --> 00:17:59,860 Not in my hood. 386 00:18:00,820 --> 00:18:04,800 Oh, man, this is fun, guys. I got to admit, I didn't think it would be as 387 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,980 fun as my normal game at Prince's house, but it's great. 388 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:08,360 Prince? What? 389 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:10,199 The Prince? 390 00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,980 Yeah, man. Yeah, it's going on right now, actually. 391 00:18:13,380 --> 00:18:17,740 If you could get us an invite to play at Prince's house, I would lose it. The 392 00:18:17,740 --> 00:18:19,100 game's going on right now, man. 393 00:18:19,300 --> 00:18:21,160 Why don't you go play at Prince's house? 394 00:18:21,380 --> 00:18:22,580 That's it. Get out. 395 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:26,200 All right, we'll go. I want y 'all to go. Y 'all need to go over there and 396 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:27,659 Get out. 397 00:18:27,660 --> 00:18:30,280 Go to Prince's house. Go over there and play with somebody that's got purple 398 00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:32,860 gloves. Let's go to Prince's house. Go. 399 00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:36,320 They're the same size, only he's nicer. Go. Go play with purple cards. 400 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,900 Let's do it. Let's go to Prince's house. What should I do about the money? 401 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,400 Should I call you? No, no, no. I know how much it is. I'll cut a check. No, 402 00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:46,360 your ass out of my house. Don't you touch that beer. Get out of my house. 403 00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:50,260 out. Hey, man. I had a really great time. I don't like to shake hands in my 404 00:18:50,260 --> 00:18:51,800 house. I don't have any sanitizer. 405 00:18:52,140 --> 00:18:53,140 Really? Yeah, really. 406 00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:55,440 So, Robin, maybe you just should never come back here. 407 00:18:59,270 --> 00:19:02,550 Why are you set tripping, homie? I mean, I thought we just had a good time. 408 00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:03,770 You ain't seen set tripping. 409 00:19:04,770 --> 00:19:05,770 Wow. 410 00:19:06,630 --> 00:19:07,630 That's set tripping. 411 00:19:07,750 --> 00:19:08,750 Okay. Yeah. 412 00:19:08,970 --> 00:19:10,310 Okay. All right, man. Yeah. 413 00:19:10,790 --> 00:19:13,370 I hope he doesn't make you guys play with your asses out. 414 00:19:13,930 --> 00:19:14,990 Because that's how we played. 415 00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:18,190 Robin thinks he can come over here and take all my money? 416 00:19:18,470 --> 00:19:19,470 Take my friend? 417 00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:20,950 Take Brit? 418 00:19:21,510 --> 00:19:23,630 Let me tell you something, Robin. I am Kevin Hart. 419 00:19:23,910 --> 00:19:24,910 And I'm a beast. 420 00:19:25,170 --> 00:19:26,170 And you're a dove. 421 00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:29,640 And this is what it sounds like when doves cry. 422 00:19:30,940 --> 00:19:37,160 I love Prince. 423 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:39,200 I should have went. 424 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,420 This is the life of the Hollywood. 425 00:19:43,020 --> 00:19:45,280 Next week on Real Husbands of Hollywood. 426 00:19:45,540 --> 00:19:48,620 How did you get Kevin to sit down with you? I told him Paula would be here. 427 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:50,720 Where's Paula at? 428 00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:54,340 Yeah, I heard some stuff about you. I can't even believe. 429 00:19:55,950 --> 00:19:57,950 It's a s*** on Tenant Fest up there! 430 00:19:58,870 --> 00:20:00,170 Okay, we need to talk. 431 00:20:00,550 --> 00:20:02,990 I'm about to sue Calvin, little a**, for everything he got. 432 00:20:03,230 --> 00:20:04,230 You're going down. 433 00:20:04,690 --> 00:20:08,350 Up next on BET, the next generation of weigh -ins. 434 00:20:08,630 --> 00:20:10,010 Featuring Damien, the director. 435 00:20:10,390 --> 00:20:11,390 Craig, the writer. 436 00:20:11,850 --> 00:20:16,490 George, the honorary weigh -in. And Maya, the assistant. A new comedy about 437 00:20:16,490 --> 00:20:17,490 making it in Hollywood. 438 00:20:17,820 --> 00:20:20,660 Now we Negroes in Paris. Your card got declined. You don't know how to ball 439 00:20:20,660 --> 00:20:23,680 responsibly. You already have a crazy baby, Mommy. You want a crazy ex 440 00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:24,700 -assistant, too? Damn! 441 00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:26,260 All responsibly? Yeah. 442 00:20:26,460 --> 00:20:27,620 Ooh, I'm going to tweet that. 443 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:30,020 Second Generation Wayans premieres next. 444 00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:32,380 Following the Real Husbands of Hollywood on BET. 445 00:20:32,740 --> 00:20:34,180 Nobody's got it like we've got it. 35810

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