All language subtitles for one_on_one_s02e05_pop_art

Cooking again?

Daddy, you know the hospital said if
they have to pump my stomach one more

it's the foster home for me.

Very funny, baby. My girl, Celeste, is
stopping by on her way to work, so I

thought I'd surprise her with her
favorite, Huevos Rancheros. Ha -ha!

Yeah. Flex make style.

I've seen this setup before.

The rolls, the eggs, the hot sauce.

Uh -uh, it's day 29. This is a breakup
breakfast.

Save the garnish for her broken heart,
okay?

are you talking about daddy you never
date the same woman for longer than one

month because that would make it a
relationship and you like your

like you like your eggs over easy you
know that is not true what about tanya

tanya and i were together for months no
you only dated for one month and then

she hung around long enough for the free
food and direct tv oh and that's not a

relationship

Daddy, just let Celeste down easy.

You know, dental hygienists are very
sensitive. Why you think she keep giving

floss?

Sweetie, believe me, you are so wrong
about this.

Rihanna, here, I brought you some floss.

That's so thoughtful and hygienic. You
know what, girl, I got some for you.

Just because.

Thank you, Rihanna.

Okay, Rihanna, sweetie, have a good day
at school now.

Juevos rancheros, I smell. Yes, it is.

You are so sweet. Oh, I may be sweet,
but my huevos is hot.

I can't believe we've been dating a
month. Hey, you know what? My cousin's

wedding's this weekend. My family's
dying to meet you. We're going, okay?

This weekend?

Oh, baby, that's this weekend. You know
what? This weekend's bad because this is

the weekend that I moved to France.

You can be alone by yourself.

But I have a partner.

But I can't trust no one else.

So don't isolate yourself.

When there's nobody around.

I'll be there for you.

What a true love for you.

This is me and you. It's the worst.

is going to show her work in a real
gallery, so this has to be perfect.

So you might want to get a real artist.

That was not funny.

I'm just kidding, sweetie. I thought you
wanted to be an actress.

Well, like Ms. Clark says, don't be held
down by one dream.

We women are multifaceted.

A woman with only one dream is a man.

Oh, so I see. Ms. Clark is one of those
man -haters.

No, she's a womanist, a woman who
supports other women.

Ah, so she's an ugly woman.

Okay, you know what? Just for that, I'm
putting in your razor bumps.

Yeah, this is an interesting change of
pace, you defending your teachers. I

mean, what's next? A black dude on
Friends?

Yo, Chandler, holler at me. Hit me on
the two -way.

Okay, you know what? I think I'm going
to need some more clay. I underestimated

the size of your head.

Flex, Flex, I did it. I feel like a new
man.

I decided to move out of my mama's
house.

Really? Man, it seems like last week you
just turned 33.

Oh, hold on. It was 34.

That's right, dog.

I'm a grown man.

The time has come for Dwayne Odell Knox
to strike out on his own.

Plus, if I don't move out, my mama's
going to keep interrupting my basement

boogie.

I can picture that.

Dwayne, you better tell your friend to
cover up. I'm going to have to come down

there and join y 'all.

use of the medium.

It's very reminiscent of early Rodan.

That big bird that fought Godzilla?

Actually, I was talking about a
different Rodan, but that Rodan made

impression on Tokyo.

And I see someone's making quite an
impression on you.

You're giving all your power away with
your eyes.

I'm sorry, it's just that I'm so weak
for him.

What's wrong with me?

Nothing's wrong with you. What's going
on, Brianna?

Well, it's just that I have a thing for
Arnaz, but he likes this girl with

big... You know.

Big butter chellies? Yeah.

Honey, you're talking about a 16 -year
-old boy. When you get older, you'll

find... Well, not that much changes.

You are an amazing person, and someday
he's going to recognize that.

Well, I hope you're right.

Oh, can I ask you about one more thing
that's been bothering me? Of course.

Should I stuff?

Yeah, work for me.

Spirit, did you make that dress out of
duct tape?

Anybody can make a dress out of fabric.

But Miss Clark says for the art show, I
should think outside of the box.

I don't think she meant the trash box.

So, uh, what do you think about my
piece?

Wait a minute.

That's Rihanna's head.

It's Ginger's body.

Ooh, Ginger got some jacked up feet.

No, no, actually, those are yours.

I wanted your cashew toes to balance out
all that beauty.

Well, these nutty toes can still kick
your squirrely butt.

Boobies!

All right, boys. Listen, women's bodies
have been the subject of great art for

centuries. Now, as artists and as human
beings, we have got to have respect for

the beauty of the female form. Amen.

Now, Arnaz.

Yes, Miss Clark?

What is it you feel when you look at
this piece?

I feel as though I have to respect those
beautiful boobies.

Man, Flex, you should have seen the
place my realtor showed me today, man.

,000 a month, and I got a view of the
park, a view of the city, a view of the

poorhouse.

You've got to find something a little
more reasonable, something more

comfortable, you know, somewhere you can
afford.

Yeah, I know, Flex. I'm just so excited
about being out on my own. You know, I

get carried away.

You're right.

I've got to be responsible.

That's right. You know, I've got to be
mature.

Mm -hmm. I've got to be an adult.

I've got to... Oh, my God!

Boobies!

Ow! Ow!

Hey! Hey!

You're defacing my artwork.

How would you like someone to deface
yours?

You know, it looks a lot better if you
squint your eyes all the way shut and

turn around.

So you don't like it? I don't blame the
kids. I blame the teacher.

Oh, really?

Well, I heard she's pretty good.

Yeah, I'm not one to gossip, but this
teacher sounds like one of those...

Feminists? Even worse. She calls herself
a womanist.

That's French for ugly.

No.

They're the worst.

I mean, she's probably filling your
daughter's head with outrageous ideas

equal rights and self -respect.

I bet she doesn't even shave under her
arms.

You know, and she probably wears flannel
shirts and combat boots. Mm -hmm.

And a buzz cut. Oh!

Okay, stop. You're scaring me.

Oh, don't worry.

I'll protect you, little lady.

Oh, would you kind, sir?

Because I'm just vulnerable.

Helpless.

Defenseless.

Art teacher.

Hi, I'm Miss Clark.

Uh, uh, uh, hi, I'm Coop Jones.

I'm Spirit's father. Yeah, yeah.

If you have to fail her, I understand. I
told her, hit the books, hit the books.

Nice try, Mr. Washington. I've seen you
on TV, and I know you're Brianna's

father.

Call me a flex.

I'm just kidding about what I said
earlier.

My daughter's crazy about you. You're
her favorite teacher.

Well, I can't tell you what a pleasure
it is having Brianna in my class. She is

a talented artist with a promising
future.

My Brianna?

Have you seen this potato she's passing
off as my head?

So, your head's big and lumpy.

Embrace it.

and think about it.

I think she likes me.

Daddy, Miss Clark is not like the women
you usually date.

She's different.

When she wears jewelry with her name on
it, it's a fashion, not a reminder.

Hey, that's for me and them. It's hard
remembering everybody's name.

But, Dad, do you know how embarrassing
it would be for me if you started dating

one of my teachers?

I mean, I can hear it now. Hey, yo, yo,
Brianna Daddy is flat -apping Miss

Clark.

Okay, Brianna, I hear you.

Daddy, seriously, stay away from Mr.
Clark.

I've got better things to do than to
flirt with your teacher.

Hey, Ms. Clark.

Hey, Lumpy.

Look, I think we got off to a bad start.

By calling me an ugly French woman in
combat boots, we got off to a great

Look, I'm not one of those maddest.

Rough crowd, rough crowd.

Maybe I can make you laugh over dinner
sometime.

Charming, Mr. Washington.

Call me Flex. Mr. Washington.

Flex.

I make it a policy never to date my
students' fathers.

You know, I've seen some of those
fathers. That's a good policy.

Ah, it's the ugly French woman laughs.
Okay,

all right, so you don't date fathers.
What if we call it a parent -teacher

conference over lobster and...

Champagne. Oh, unfortunately, Mr.
Washington, I learned the hard way. I

never mix my professional life with my
personal life.

I respect that.

But what if we just happen to be in the
same place at the same time? Oh, say, I

don't know, Jaffe's at 8 o 'clock
Saturday night.

I would call that more of a coincidence
than a date, wouldn't you?

You don't give up, do you, Flex?

Mr.

Washington.

You are charming.

Daddy, you couldn't help yourself, could
you? You had to go over there and flirt

with Miss Clark.

No, see, she was... You know, what
happened is what she... Okay,

she wasn't interested.

No, no, she just treated me like I was
a... A Dwayne.

Boobies.

So, would you like to order something,
since it appears that your lady friend

isn't going to make it? Oh, no, no, no,
no, no. She's going to make it.

She's just being fashionably late.

Well, I'll get you another basket of
free bread.

Oh, good news.

Your lady friend has just arrived.

Hi, Daddy.

What's the matter?

You were expecting Miss Clark?

Well, I, uh, uh, see, free bread?

So, are we gonna order here?

Sure, I'll have the lobster, and he'll
have the crow.

Brianna, what are you doing here?

Well, Spirit overheard you asking Miss
Clark out, and I knew she wouldn't show

up because of her policy.

Besides, she's not the one to fall for
your charming potato head wave.

Did she say that?

She never mentioned you, Dad.

Oh, so you just came down here to gloat.
Oh, no, I just wanted to come down here

and say I told you so. Oh, yeah, which
reminds me, I told you so.

You know, it's moments like these that
make me realize you're your mama's

daughter.

Dad, do not be upset because you got
caught up in your own web of lies and

deceit, okay?

This happens to the best of players.

Let's just face it.

Ms. Clark is out of your league.

Oh.

Sweetie, I am a single, good -looking...

Well -paid brother.

I am the league.

The league MVP.

So, uh, if given a chance, I could woo
your Miss Clark. Handle that right

Wait, wait, wait. Hold up, hold up, hold
up. You woo Miss Clark?

Uh, I don't think so. I love you, Daddy,
but you just can't make that happen.

Ooh!

Is that a challenge?

You run with the big dogs, you're going
to get bit.

Ten.

All right, you're on.

She's hosting a show at the gallery
tomorrow, and we can go down there and

you crash and burn, Daddy -O.

Daddy -O?

Man, she better have some serious
insurance because she's about to get

And the funny thing is, I like her
because she's making me bring out my A

Speaking of A -game, I got to get A1
credit.

Finally found my 40 acres and a mule.
Congratulations, man. Thanks.

Actually, it's only 600 square feet, but
I'm going to hang a picture of a mule

up in the bathroom.

Oh, my new landlord is running a credit
check. So when he calls, you might

answer in the phone, United Bank of
Baltimore.

Yeah, great. And remember, I have 150K
in Swiss francs.

Uh, should I use my English accent?

Oh, cheers, mate. I'd expect nothing
less. Well, I'll talk.

Uh, Daddy, why do you have all that
cologne on? You smell like Grandpa when

going to the racetrack.

To woo a womanist, you must think like a
womanist. Now watch me womanize.

Like all expressionist painters, Mike
Kroll depicts subjective emotions, not

objective reality.

It's obvious that a man painted that.

Look, the whole piece lacks the
sophistication and tenderness of a

Okay.

Way to woo, Dad. Way to woo.

Now, if you'll turn your attention to
this wall.

In this painting by Susan Holcomb, we
have a beautiful example of a style

as photorealism. I see her female
reality, a world void of war and hate. I

fresh just looking at it.

I really do.

Paint me a bra and I'll burn it.

How about I paint you a muzzle?

Kinky.

Uh, you know what, Dad? I think I'm
gonna go clean off my shoes. I think I

stepped in some of your woo.

Abstract expressionists like Ted Van
Cleave explore color and shape rather

specific subject.

Only a man would be interested in
something as trite as shape.

But here's a subject worth exploring.

Have dinner with me.

Flex, I'm working here.

Not as hard as I am.

I'm afraid we're going to have to stop.
Thanks to our many interruptions, we're

out of time and patience.

Thank you. Come again.

So, uh, I see you're off now.

Flex, what was your plan? To come down
here and nag me into a date?

Well, if it's working, yes.

Did you hear anything I said about the
artwork?

Of course I did. I watched every move.

Okay, if you're so interested in what I
do, tell me about that painting.

It's nice.

You are so deep, Mr. Washington. Good
night.

Oh, here we go again with the Mr.
Washington. What do you want me to say?

not about what I want you to say. It's
about what you feel.

What, do you want me to tell you how
brilliant the artist is?

I mean, it looks like a child did this.

Okay, what else?

I mean, the colors are all over the
place.

Like he was in a rush to do it, or he
couldn't make up his mind.

Go on.

for me the guy was either confused or
angry

maybe not angry at all maybe in love

maybe in pain maybe in pain because of
love

Wow Wow you really get it

how'd you do that you did it You finally
shut your mouth and opened your mind.

Brianna's right.

You're an excellent teacher.

Are you still flirting with me?

No, no, that was from the heart. I meant
that.

Too bad. I was hoping you were flirting.

Why, Miss Clark, what about your policy?

Forget the policy.

You're okay, Brianna.

I will be once I gouge my eyes out.

Brianna. Okay, I know what happened.

You tripped and landed on his lips,
right?

Not exactly.

You... You teacher kisser!

Natalie, could you give us a moment
alone, please?

I hope you're not too disappointed in
me, Brianna.

But I can't believe you fell for his
act.

You're a woman then.

You're right, I am.

And a true woman is a real woman.

And honey, I need a man.

I hope you understand.

Daddy, I don't want Miss Clark to end up
being another one of your 30 -day

girls.

She's more than a teacher to me. She's
my friend.

And I don't want you to hurt her.

Ho, ho, ho.

Brie, I don't want to start dating
someone with the intention of hurting

Really? Because that's what seems to
always happen.

Not always. I've been hurt too, you
know.

Yeah, right, name one time.

Your mother and me.

Now, we may not get along now, but I did
love her.

I still do. I mean, it's different.

Daddy. Brianna, relationships are hard.

Maybe that's why I don't like to get in
them.

Then why get in one with Miss Clark?

I don't know.

I admit, I got all caught up in the
chase.

I mean, she's hot.

See, I knew it.

Sweetie, tonight she showed me things in
a whole new light. She forced me to be

real. And when it comes to women, that's
not something that's easy for me.

Maybe I think it's worth exploring.

Well, I still don't like it, but I guess
I can't stop you.

Don't worry, baby. I won't disappoint
you.

You better not. I know where you live.

Girl, you better go ahead.

across the hall from each other man it
doesn't get any better than this does it

Love you too, Netta.