Original subtitles

Congratulations. Thank you, baby.

Man, that ring is tight.

Johnny must have dropped some serious papers.

Gotta be a leaf of curd.

Look again, boy.

Two curds.

Put your bling on, Flats.

Hey, everybody.

Hey. Is that an engagement ring on your finger?

Oh, you mean this big old sparkly thing on my ring finger? I think so.

You'll be graduating soon.

Well, most of you.

Don't worry about me. I'm starting my own business.

Oh, me too. I gave my notice last week. Mavis and I opened up a little cafe.

Oh, what do you have to wait?

Okay.

Dang.

This is our last week together.

Y 'all my dogs.

Except for graduation.

What's that supposed to mean?

Nothing. I was only... Look, just because I'm unmarried and with child

make me a slut.

You? With child?

How'd that happen?

I don't have to stand here and listen to your vicious gossip and personal

attacks.

Hey,

yo, Regina. Yes, I...

He proposed on Tuesday. We got married on Wednesday.

You know, no frills. Just the two of us.

Mm. Too cheap to throw a real wedding, huh?

Yeah.

Well, it doesn't matter. The point is, you finally found a man who truly loves

you. And so did I!

So, tell me your wedding plans.

Well, there's going to be two weddings.

Why? You don't think they're going to believe you the first time?

No. Johnny's got to be in New York next Monday, so we're getting married

Saturday. But that was too soon for my folks, so we're going to have another

ceremony later in Atlanta.

Okay, so I got to church.

Oh, let me get that.

Hello?

Oh, hey, Carla. I mean, Pastor Samson.

Uh -huh.

I see.

No, girl, I understand.

Okay.

Talk to you later.

There's been a mix -up.

The church scheduled a conference the same day as my wedding.

Oh, well, just get married the next day.

It's a five -day conference.

I don't really want to have a church wedding.

Look, it doesn't matter where you get married as long as you get married.

Don't worry.

Everything will work out.

You're right. You're right.

Still got the best caterer in town.

Ingrid? You know it. That girl can throw down, baby.

Hello? Oh, hey, Ingrid.

What?

Houston? No, no, no.

I don't care what Jay -Z and Beyonce are paying you.

They can get married another day. That's my day.

No. No.

I can't pay you enough to put your kids through college.

Okay. Bye.

You might not want to answer the phone next time.

It could be Johnny.

I can't believe this. I mean, Andell, you think it's some kind of sign or

something? No, and don't start thinking like that.

You're marrying Johnny if it's the last thing I do.

But where?

Oh, you can get married in my restaurant.

And if my chef's not available, I'll cook.

Oh, you can get Popeye's.

I don't know, Andell. I mean, first my family can't come.

Then the church falls through.

The caterer. I mean, maybe there's... Uh -uh, uh -uh. Maybe my ass. You're

getting married.

Oh, baby, I am so proud of you.

Valedictorian, marriage scholar, is there no end to your talents?

Oh, there's more.

But I'll show you what I want to know.

Come on, man. We got to go pick up our taxi. All right. I will see you at the

altar. All right, baby.

Hey, are you all right?

Yeah, I'm happy for you guys. I mean, I know I don't have a degree, but I do

have my own business.

Hey, Nikki, you ready to go?

Yeah,

might as well.

Hey, Miss Parker, I've been looking for you. I knew it.

I just wanted to congratulate you on your graduation and your marriage and

you this wedding present.

It's a gift certificate.

Hope you and Johnny like Tupperware.

Well, have a nice life.

Okay, Nick, you ready to go?

More than ready.

I mean, you psycho.

Yeah.

Just a nice, quiet, plain, ordinary

life.

Yeah.

Oh.

It's going to be great.

Then why do you feel like crap?

Hello?

Hey, over here, Sherlock.

In the mirror.

I'm your inner self.

You mean my inner voice?

Hey, this isn't school. I don't need to be corrected.

Hey, hey, grouchy, aren't you?

I live in a damn mirror.

What do you expect?

Now listen, I think it's about time you admit.

That you're in love with Nikki Parker.

That's absurd.

Oh, really?

Then why is it that you spend most every day thinking about her?

Because I never know when she's going to pop up and assault me.

It must be terrible to have somebody who loves you unconditionally.

Listen, Stanley.

If you let her get married...

You're going to be making the biggest mistake of your life.

Why shouldn't she get married?

I mean, she's smart, she's funny, she's loving to a fault.

I mean, how many women do you know would go back to school at her age? Not to

mention raise a daughter that most people would have put up for adoption.

And don't forget about the sex.

What about the sex?

Oh, come on.

Don't play games.

Claire, you know she rocked your world.

Yeah.

And you mean you're not going to miss any of that?

Maybe a little.

It's important, you know.

Yeah, you're right.

I mean, I'm right.

Just shut up and get out of here.

I got to stop her.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, you're the smartest of them all.

What a cornball.

All right, all right.

Hey, hey, Yandel.

Is Miss Parker here? I need to speak to her.

Well, in case you forgot, she has a wedding to go to.

Hers.

Yeah, but I...

She can't marry Johnny.

Why not?

Because... Because I love Miss Parker.

And I can't live my life without her.

Is this the part where Ashton Kutcher jumps out?

Because I know I'm getting punked.

And, Del, I'm dead serious.

Professor, Nikki has a chance to be really happy.

With a wonderful man who loves her.

Don't ruin it.

Oh, no, no. Miss Parker and I belong together.

I mean, if you don't believe me, ask the mirror. Go ahead.

I'm kidding. I'm just wasting time. Okay, wait.

You're right. We better hurry.

Oh, can you get Nikki's coat from the closet?

Oh, my tootsie -wootsie forgot her coatsie -wootsie.

Yeah, she dizzy -wizzy.

Uh, which one, Adele?

Hey!

Hey!

Adele!

Adele, open this door!

Professor, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to let you ruin Nikki's life.

All right, get your confetti. Open this damn door!

Yes, I'm pregnant.

That's right.

Knocked up.

I'm going to be a baby mama.

How she put all that in her Honda Civic?

She took all the things out.

the professor was out there.

Nikki, you're about to marry Johnny.

Don't tell me you're still thinking about the professor.

Well, it's just that, you know, I thought, never mind.

Are you still in love with him?

Don't be silly.

I'm over him.

Done kaput.

I'm getting married to Johnny.

Now, come on. Help me with my dress.

Regina, this is my friend Shaquan. What's up?

Shaquan told us some very interesting news about you.

I seriously doubt that.

She knows who your baby daddy is.

How could she know?

I got skills, yo.

She says it's Freddy.

Freddy Fabulous.

Shaquan and Freddy go to the same beauty shop.

Okay, it was a horrible mistake.

We were both at a vulnerable point.

What I don't get is how you and Fred had, you know... Look, I am warning you.

Not a word of this to anyone.

I mean, was there like a third party involved or something?

Don't worry, Regina. Our lips are sealed.

Okay, they better be.

Don't you mean Johnny's family? Hey, Adele, this is my mom, Miss Morrow.

My sister, Carmen, and my brother, Sean. Hey, how you doing?

I've never been here before. This place is really nice.

Thanks. My new poo is so excited she forgot her shoes.

I mean, can you imagine that?

She's just a little nervous.

Johnny, I think we should get in place.

All right, all right. See you guys.

It was nice meeting you, too. Nice meeting you, too. Take care.

What is she, a dingbat?

How do you forget your wedding shoes? And who gets married in a bar?

More like a dive.

Oh, this will be worse than the day that I married your father.

Nikki,

I'm happy to stand in for your

dad.

But I doubt if anyone is going to think that I'm old enough to be your...

Father?

Well, maybe they'll think you're my brother.

Who gives this woman away?

I do.

We are gathered here today to join in holy matrimony.

Ms. Nicole Ann Parker and Mr. Johnny Morrow.

Marriage is a union not to be entered into lightly.

So if there is anyone who knows why these two people should not be joined

together, speak now or forever hold your peace.

Very well then.

Do you... Wait, wait, they can't get married.

Nikki Parker loves the professor and I'm sad to say he loves her too.

And did he tell you that?

If he loves us so much, why isn't he here?

It's funny you should mention that.

One day we're going to laugh about this.

He's kind of locked up in your closet.

so I see you made it.

Now, thanks to you, I have a dislocated shoulder from banging it against the

closet door.

That's good to see you.

Miss Parker, look, I've been a fool all these years.

And after the way I treated you, I don't blame you for telling me to get lost.

I'll do it for her. Get lost.

And even if you turn me away, I still want you to know I

love you, Vicki Parker.

With all my heart and soul.

I love you too, boo.

I'm sorry, Johnny.

I think you are a wonderful man.

But this man is my soulmate.

Well, I just want you to know, I'm not paying for any of this.

Ms.

Parker.

I mean, Nikki.

We...

Will you marry me?

Stanley, yes.

Yes. Yes.

I

now

pronounce you husband and wife.

You may kiss your bride.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr.

and Mrs. Stanley Devante Ogilvie.

Y 'all need to stop all this fighting.

Y 'all, I done messed my line up. Wait, exactly right. Do my thing. Leave me

alone. Oh, my gosh.

Dang it.

Boy, Picker, how come you never brought me here before?

Because, my candidate, that would make it difficult for me to pick you.