Original subtitles

Hakeem got a new trick.

Oh, that's great. I'm so happy for him.

Why? Because he's an ex -boyfriend?

No, here we go again.

No, because he's a friend, see?

Probably carjacked it.

Don't hate, especially when he wants to take us to Vegas.

Oh, that'll be fun.

I haven't seen Hakeem in ages.

I'm sure he still looks the same.

God, you can't go anyway.

Don't you have a test you're studying for? I took it this morning. Oh, how

convenient.

Oh, looks like there's trouble between Ebony and I three.

No, Ebony's cool.

Hey, y 'all. Hey.

Oh, cute top, Stevie.

Thank you. Really, you don't think it's too tight?

It's a tube top, T. If it were any looser, it would be around my ankles.

You would love that, wouldn't you?

Mama, we're going to Vegas this weekend.

You want to come?

Oh, I can't, baby. Remember, it's my annual poker game with the girls.

And speaking of poker, there's my boo.

Hey, baby.

Do I look like your baby?

No, but we can make a baby that looks just like you.

One trip into the fiery pits of hell is enough for me.

I was hot, wasn't I?

is that I'm really feeling you and that any gal would be crazy not to want you.

T, you're the only guy I want to be with, okay?

All right.

Apart from being so jealous. Okay.

Are you wearing a bra? T!

I'm sorry.

My bad. I'm moving. I'm fine.

hair is messed up on that side.

Who's that hugger, bro?

Um, well, in this country, we call that saying hello.

Hello, I'm available.

I can appreciate the little turning little thing.

Okay, okay, listen up, listen up. Before we get started, I need to put you up on

game to Hakeem's rule rules, all right?

There'll be no eating, no drinking, and definitely no sleeping in my ride.

Why no sleeping?

I don't want you drooling all over my plastic slipcovers.

Come on, man, let's go.

Uh, Kim, are you going to get your bags?

Uh, okay.

Hakeem, don't you think the wool hat and the scarf are a bit much?

It's 90 degrees outside.

My child, style knows no temperature.

Well, I hope it knows deodorant.

Stevie, wouldn't you rather sit back here with your girl, Kim?

Uh -uh, she talks too much.

Forget you.

Kim and I haven't seen each other in a while. We have a lot of catching up to

do.

Hey, remember that movie we saw that time? I'm trying to think of the name of

it. What do you know?

Catching Up.

Still.

What is the matter with you?

Nothing. Just trying to protect what's mine.

Don't worry, there's nothing going on between them.

I mean, just because Kimmy goes to a real school...

Has a real job and drives a real car. Whoa.

What about me?

You got nice eyes, huh?

Stevie, I really think you would feel more comfortable back here. Yo, T, man,

there some sort of problem?

No, I'm cool.

I just thought that my girlfriend would feel more comfortable back here. Fine, I

will sit back there if it'll make you happy. Only if you want to. It's totally

up to you.

I can't pull over.

Ugh, because I need to stretch my leg.

T, can you help me unstick my thighs from these plastics? Look up.

And I raised you two more.

I'll take that.

Too rich for my blood, Mrs. Oprah Winfrey.

What about you, Destiny?

Now I forget.

Four of a kind is good, right?

I fold.

Me too.

Guess I win.

What did you have four of?

Nothing. I was just asking a question.

you go, girl. I'm not mad at you. Well, I am. I just lost $7 .25.

So, Nikki, is that cute little professor still asking about me?

Ask about my man one more time, Gertie, and you're going to lose more than your

money.

What noise?

The one coming from the back.

Shh, wait, wait.

Sounds like Ritz bits.

Ritz bits. Kim!

I'm not eating Ritz bits.

They're gold bits.

Now look at you, Kim. Now you're getting crumbs all over my floor.

I told you. No eating in my walk.

You're disrespecting a vehicle.

That's me. It's only crackers.

Oh, yeah, sure, Kim. That's how it starts. Then the next thing you know,

chicken bones and they all brattle over my floor.

You got some chicken?

Your stereo system sounds really good, Hakeem.

You're all kind of muscle to me.

Yeah, you speakers are the best the money can buy.

You've been bold.

Well, at least you weren't on my side.

Man, keep your eyes on the road.

I know what I'm doing.

I know what you're doing, too, and it's not going to work. Hey.

Young dog, if you are so uncomfortable, maybe you shouldn't have come. Oh, you

would love that, wouldn't you? You don't make me have to put you out. Oh, go

ahead. Put me out. Well, Stevie's coming with me. Oh, no, Stevie's not.

Hey, don't pull over, Hakeem.

Well, I'm not.

Then why are you slowing down?

It's not me. It's my truck.

I knew this was a piece of junk.

There's nothing wrong with my ride.

Yeah,

it just doesn't work.

I thought you said your truck was new. It was new.

Back in 95.

You guys, this place looks deserted.

Yonkey pushing!

Yeah, well, we would probably be in Vegas by now if we hadn't taken T's

shortcut.

Hey, I'm Louie. Can I help you?

Yeah, my truck won't stop me. Is there anyone around who could take a look at

it? It's going to be a little tough, seeing as we're a little backed up

But for a cute little lady like you, I bet you I can squeeze you in.

Oh, boy.

What's wrong with you? You can't tell anything by lifting the hood. I guess

you're not the brains in the bunch, huh?

But you can fix it, right?

Of course I can.

The best darn mechanic in town.

I bet you're the only darn mechanic in town.

Look, in the meantime, is there any place we can get something to eat? You

see too good, do you?

There's a diner right over there. It's the best darn food in town.

I bet it's the only darn food in town.

Pretty and smart.

I love you.

Let's go, y 'all. Let's go.

Hey, Louie really gives me the creeps.

Finally, somebody you're not trying to get with.

Well, he sure seems to like you.

Sometimes I hate being so beautiful.

Ooh.

This place is a dump.

Welcome to Louie's Diner. I'm Louie Awaita.

You know you look like Louie the mechanic?

Yeah, yeah, I get that all the time.

Could that be because you are the same guy? Look, I got customers. What'll it

be?

What about you?

Uh, the New York strip steak. How do you want that cooked, Happy?

Medium well.

Let's go.

I'll have a double cheeseburger. How about some grilled onions and some

with that?

Yeah, sounds good.

Yeah, too bad we're out of all of them.

Four orders of toast, coming right up.

with you, girl.

I told y 'all you didn't want none of me.

I doubt many people do.

Well, it looks like it's just me and you, Nikki.

I ain't scared of you, Gertie.

Where's the dip, Nikki?

Sitting right across from me.

You got up in them double D cups.

to keep it down.

I can't concentrate on my yoga.

Oh, come on, boo. Just one hand. No, forget it. I'm not interested.

I think he's scared a bunch of girls are going to take his money.

Oh, don't make me laugh.

You ladies wouldn't stand a chance.

Chicken! Here's the bill.

Oh, yeah.

Matri. Oh, no, no, no, no.

Matri.

$89 .99?

You can treat.

All we had was burnt toast.

Shh, shh, shh. Do you want the cook to hear you?

Okay, if it is. Well, if you've got a problem, I suggest you take it up with

sheriff. I think that's an excellent idea. Where can we find him? I'll go get

him for you.

Welcome to Louisville.

The waiter tells me you don't want to pay your bill.

I'd hate to have to lock you up.

Wait a minute. How did you get to be sheriff, too?

Well, it was a close election, but I won by one vote.

And nobody demanded a recount?

Hey, there.

Is our truck ready yet?

It sure is.

It better not be $100 like that toast.

No.

$2 ,500.

$2 ,500? That man, the truck didn't even cost that much.

You don't have that kind of money.

Well, then I'm going to have to go get the sheriff.

And he's going to be mad because he's on a break.

Hold up, man. You don't have to do that. Jim, do something. He likes you.

Come on, come on.

Uh, Louie, couldn't we work this out?

hard labor.

Oh, get back to work.

Shouldn't we be trying to find a way to get out of here?

Oh, yo, if only we knew where the car keys were.

Kim, hey, why don't you sweet talk him into telling you where the keys are?

distract him while we get the truck.

How's my little pumpkin pie?

Oh, fine.

But my friends are a little tired. Do you think that they could take a break?

that what you want, my little angel?

No, but they're starting to bore me.

Give them the keys to their truck so we can have some alone time.

Sounds good to me. Here you go.

I've been waiting a long time for a woman like you.

Actually, for any woman.

Oh, that's so sweet.

Look, I left my bag in the truck. I'll be right back.

I'm sorry. I can't let you do that.

Why not?

Not without a kiss first.

A kiss?

Uh, I can't kiss you. Your lips are dry.

Well, I got some lard in the back.

Oh, lard. That's perfect.

Well, put some...

He might be out of money, but he's not out of clothes.

How about some strip poker?

I don't want to see you naked.

You're not alone.

You know what? We'll put up the money.

You put up the clothes.

Slow your roll, girlie.

Now, my man's goods are for my eyes only. No, no, no, no. I want to do this.

And first of all, I'm not your man.

There's no way in the world I'm going to lose again.

That's okay. It was still an adventure, right? Yeah, yeah.

Looks like I better start heading home.

I'll walk you out in case your truck needs another push.

Yeah, you too.

Hey,

Stevie, I want to apologize for tripping lately.

I think we need to talk about a...

Things are going pretty good, huh?

Actually, T, um, we need to break up.

Why?

Because I don't want to ruin a perfectly good friendship. I mean, who's ruining

anything? T, I can't breathe.

Yes, you can. You're doing it right now.

Come on, I'm serious.

Look, if we continue dating, I'm just going to end up strangling you. I mean,

you don't even trust me.

Why? What have you been up to?

See, that's exactly what I'm talking about.

I guess you're right.

I guess I haven't acted kind of crazy lately. Huh, kind of.

So are we still friends?

Always.

Hey,

Stevie. Do you still think we could mess

around?

I mean, in a friendly way.

Hey, was that a yes or a no?

What's that?

Nothing.

Looks like the professor's underwear to me.

Why would you say that?

Because it's got his name on it.

Grown folks business.

I'm going to put this in the drawer with the rest of the things. Thank you.

I'd have to hate to have to have to have to.