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All language subtitles for The Parkers s03e08 Take the Cookies and Run

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,750 --> 00:00:02,310 Hey, Mama. Hey, baby. 2 00:00:02,790 --> 00:00:06,030 I'm going down to help Mandel move some stuff into her new club. 3 00:00:06,370 --> 00:00:07,370 Oh, that's nice. 4 00:00:07,630 --> 00:00:09,710 Since you're not doing anything, why don't you come? 5 00:00:10,530 --> 00:00:14,130 Yeah, just as soon as I bake, cool, and box all these damn cookies. 6 00:00:15,030 --> 00:00:17,590 Oh, you're still making cookies for my sorority? 7 00:00:18,230 --> 00:00:19,830 No, I'm deep -sea fishing. 8 00:00:21,210 --> 00:00:22,870 This is my last batch. 9 00:00:23,110 --> 00:00:26,530 I've been up three whole days baking. That's almost as long as I was in labor 10 00:00:26,530 --> 00:00:27,530 with you. 11 00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:32,060 If you keep this up, I can say bye to SMC and hello to early retirement. 12 00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:35,940 Yeah, you have to have a job before you can retire. 13 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,860 Oh, I did my job. I got you to order for 500 cookies. 14 00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:45,740 Um, don't you mean 500 dozen cookies? 15 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:48,900 What kind of food will order 500 dozen cookies? 16 00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:51,840 Do you really want me to answer that? 17 00:00:52,700 --> 00:00:54,520 The order was for 500 cookies. 18 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,200 Uh -uh, baby, no. 19 00:00:57,260 --> 00:00:58,800 You wrote it down right here. 20 00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:00,460 500 DZ. 21 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:02,500 DZ is short for dozen. 22 00:01:02,840 --> 00:01:05,860 No, it's short for Debra Zinger. She's the one that gave me the order. 23 00:01:07,220 --> 00:01:10,860 Kim, baby, could you hand Mama that rolling pin? 24 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:12,120 Uh -huh. 25 00:01:12,980 --> 00:01:13,980 Thank you. 26 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,740 you like 6 ,000 cookies at your new club? 27 00:02:12,180 --> 00:02:13,800 What do I look like, a Keebler elf? 28 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,780 Come on, girl. Now, I can't afford to lose this money. I got bills to pay. And 29 00:02:19,780 --> 00:02:22,240 since I quit selling Lady E, this is it for me. 30 00:02:22,500 --> 00:02:23,500 Oh, that's sad. 31 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:24,800 Sorry. 32 00:02:26,220 --> 00:02:29,560 Just let me sell them at your club one night. I mean, it's your money, too, 33 00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:31,700 partner. I know, partner. 34 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:34,940 Well, cookies won't work at my club. 35 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:38,720 After years of serving kids and making smoothies, I'm running an adult 36 00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:39,720 establishment. 37 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:41,740 So you opening up a strip club? 38 00:02:42,860 --> 00:02:48,560 No, it's a classy establishment where professional singles can meet, mingle, 39 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:49,560 get they freak on. 40 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,820 Ah, so it's a classy strip club. 41 00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:50,580 girls from your big sister's organization to sell these cookies for 42 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:52,400 I don't know. 43 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,140 All right, well, take your time. Don't eat them all at once. 44 00:03:57,920 --> 00:03:58,980 I'll give them a call. 45 00:03:59,500 --> 00:04:06,220 Girls, what we have here are 6 ,000 of Nikki 46 00:04:06,220 --> 00:04:08,280 Parker's finest gourmet cookies. 47 00:04:08,620 --> 00:04:13,600 And with your help, everyone at SMC will have a chance to experience them. Is 48 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:14,600 this a pyramid scheme? 49 00:04:17,420 --> 00:04:18,420 Why don't you go to the back? 50 00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:23,240 And why do we have to wear these dumb uniforms? 51 00:04:23,940 --> 00:04:26,840 Because they were the only ones left at the 99 -cent store. 52 00:04:27,180 --> 00:04:29,600 But I'm allergic to polyester. 53 00:04:29,840 --> 00:04:31,440 Well, don't sneeze on the cookies. 54 00:04:32,900 --> 00:04:38,300 Now, as I was saying, you all look like winners to me. And in life, winners can 55 00:04:38,300 --> 00:04:40,360 do anything they set their minds on. 56 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:46,100 Now, remember, when things get tough, defeat is not an option. What did I just 57 00:04:46,100 --> 00:04:47,049 say? 58 00:04:47,050 --> 00:04:48,270 Something about tough feet. 59 00:04:50,070 --> 00:04:52,390 Cut to the chase. What's in it for us? 60 00:04:53,250 --> 00:04:56,310 A fun opportunity for you to... 61 00:05:27,180 --> 00:05:29,500 Because you're so fine. Five dollars a bag? 62 00:05:30,220 --> 00:05:32,500 Because you have good taste, I'll buy five. 63 00:05:32,820 --> 00:05:33,940 Wow, five bags? 64 00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:36,180 No, five cookies. Brothers on a budget. 65 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:40,520 These are very fresh. 66 00:05:40,780 --> 00:05:43,340 And pound for pound, they're the best value for your money. 67 00:05:46,940 --> 00:05:49,600 That was good, baby. But next time, sell them, too. 68 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:53,260 Put this on the vending machine. 69 00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:56,100 Bro, but the machine's not... 70 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:57,840 But I am. Let go. 71 00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:01,960 Are those vegan? 72 00:06:02,980 --> 00:06:04,340 Are they vegan? 73 00:06:04,620 --> 00:06:05,539 Uh -huh. 74 00:06:05,540 --> 00:06:07,200 They're the veganist. 75 00:06:12,460 --> 00:06:17,880 Next time, don't answer any questions until you have money in hand, okay? 76 00:06:27,660 --> 00:06:31,020 chocolate chip cookies? Danielle, what are you guys doing here? I didn't hear 77 00:06:31,020 --> 00:06:32,120 anything about a cookie sale. 78 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,000 We're selling these for Mrs. Ogilvie. 79 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:36,620 Mrs. Ogilvie? 80 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:43,420 Miss Parker, what's going on here? 81 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:44,639 Hey, boo. 82 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:46,620 Hi, girl. This is my man. 83 00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:49,460 I am not your man. Will you stop saying that? 84 00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:52,880 Girl, you've got some work to do. 85 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,800 Why do you have the girls from the Big Sisters organization selling cookies 86 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:58,800 out of the student union? 87 00:06:58,860 --> 00:07:01,880 Because the ladybugs, they got the streets locked down. 88 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:06,540 Ms. Parker, you are in direct violation of Code 2, Section 3 from the Big 89 00:07:06,540 --> 00:07:09,800 Brother Big Sisters Handbook, which clearly states that members are 90 00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:13,900 from soliciting goods not authorized by the organization for personal gain. 91 00:07:14,340 --> 00:07:16,460 Well, what's the big deal, Judge Jones? 92 00:07:16,780 --> 00:07:18,180 Damn, they're just cookies. 93 00:07:18,860 --> 00:07:23,140 Besides, I am teaching them the value of hard work. Yeah, well... 94 00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:24,500 Rules are rules. 95 00:07:27,060 --> 00:07:28,920 This is not over, Mrs. Ogilvy. 96 00:07:29,460 --> 00:07:30,460 Mr. Parker. 97 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:46,920 Dang, Mama, if this is what an adult club is like, I want to stay young 98 00:08:23,210 --> 00:08:24,210 happy hour. 99 00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,830 I'm sure that I didn't waste my time trying to stuff my cookies up in here. 100 00:08:30,190 --> 00:08:31,330 You don't need to. 101 00:08:32,230 --> 00:08:33,929 Mama's cookies are selling fast. 102 00:08:34,610 --> 00:08:36,850 Those little rugrats are a gold mine. 103 00:08:37,070 --> 00:08:38,789 You know, they saw every last one of my cookies. 104 00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:41,730 And all it'll cost is a little Bow Wow tickets. 105 00:08:42,309 --> 00:08:45,510 Now, I'm going to get the tickets later. But right now, I'm going to put the 106 00:08:45,510 --> 00:08:46,510 money back into the company. 107 00:08:46,930 --> 00:08:48,090 What about my shit? 108 00:08:48,790 --> 00:08:51,810 And the first rule of business is to reinvest. 109 00:08:52,460 --> 00:08:53,259 Uh, no. 110 00:08:53,260 --> 00:08:55,220 Indel's first rule is to pay the one you owe. 111 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,040 Whoa. 112 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:03,940 Are we in the right place? 113 00:09:06,220 --> 00:09:08,180 What gave it away, the sign that says Indel's? 114 00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:13,340 Man, now you know it's bad when there's no crowd on opening night. 115 00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:15,020 And it's free. 116 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:23,180 fool, buy a drink, buy any damn thing. 117 00:09:29,840 --> 00:09:31,940 Oh, well, leave the music. Stop it. 118 00:09:34,900 --> 00:09:35,920 Hey, boo. 119 00:09:36,340 --> 00:09:37,340 Let's dance. 120 00:09:38,180 --> 00:09:40,420 Hey, big mama. You want to dance? 121 00:09:41,220 --> 00:09:42,220 She'd love to. 122 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:48,360 Yeah, little mama. I just love me a big, bony woman. 123 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:50,580 Girl, you so fine. 124 00:09:51,020 --> 00:09:53,400 I could drink a tub of your bad water. 125 00:09:54,580 --> 00:09:57,260 You need to drink a tub of Listerine. 126 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,020 Because your breath is kicking. 127 00:10:01,340 --> 00:10:02,400 Get away from me. 128 00:10:05,660 --> 00:10:08,820 Wait up for it. It's playing our song. No means yes. 129 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:18,280 Sweet and petite. 130 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:22,520 wounded woman. 131 00:10:24,260 --> 00:10:27,940 You so fine, girl, I could drink a tub of your bath water. 132 00:10:28,780 --> 00:10:31,040 Oh, I don't take baths. 133 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:34,880 I take showers. 134 00:10:35,180 --> 00:10:36,480 Do you drink shower water? 135 00:10:39,420 --> 00:10:40,420 Never mind. 136 00:10:45,060 --> 00:10:49,420 And Dale, look, if you really want to get it cracking up in here, what you 137 00:10:49,420 --> 00:10:52,510 to do is hook up some poles, and hiring some live dancers. 138 00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:57,970 Boy, this is an upscale club. Now go over there and order some hot wings. 139 00:11:00,370 --> 00:11:01,370 Okay, look. 140 00:11:01,490 --> 00:11:04,910 Bump the strip club. But if you just get some banging entertainment, I guarantee 141 00:11:04,910 --> 00:11:06,450 you, it'll be on and popping. 142 00:11:06,910 --> 00:11:09,230 Ooh, T, if we could get a crowd in here, I'd kiss you. 143 00:11:09,670 --> 00:11:10,890 Okay, I was thinking like this. 144 00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:15,750 I get the money from the door, and you take the board. 145 00:11:16,130 --> 00:11:17,130 Ooh, that's deep. 146 00:11:17,370 --> 00:11:20,370 But I got a lot of money invested in the club, and it's got to work for me. 147 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:28,700 Yeah, well, when they play, you should be committed. I'll join you. 148 00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:36,440 Excuse me. 149 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,100 Would you like to buy? 150 00:11:42,460 --> 00:11:44,660 Mrs. Ogilvy, I can't work anymore. 151 00:11:45,380 --> 00:11:46,380 What's wrong, baby? 152 00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:48,020 My dogs are barking. 153 00:11:48,680 --> 00:11:50,420 Oh, girl, it's all in your head. Suck it up. 154 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:53,060 You only have six more hours to go. 155 00:11:58,380 --> 00:11:59,380 Well, what did you eat? 156 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:01,900 I ate some cookies because you wouldn't give us a break. 157 00:12:02,260 --> 00:12:03,260 How many? 158 00:12:03,620 --> 00:12:04,620 Forty. 159 00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:08,520 That would cost you $36. 160 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,400 There she is. 161 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:18,700 Okay, girls, that's it. Drop the cookies and follow me. 162 00:12:19,180 --> 00:12:22,040 Why on earth are you wearing those horrible outfits? 163 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:23,520 She made... 164 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,360 You call yourself a big sister? 165 00:12:30,620 --> 00:12:35,800 Go. I was just... You. 166 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:38,620 You ought to be ashamed of yourself. 167 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:42,120 It's not... Mrs. 168 00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:49,520 Ogilvie, you're still getting a ticket to see LeBow, aren't you? 169 00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:50,740 Oh, yeah. 170 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:04,080 Now I need you to go out and sell, sell, sell. 171 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,320 Cookies! Cookies! 172 00:13:18,680 --> 00:13:19,980 Get your cookies here. 173 00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:24,160 Okay, tell me again why we're wearing these stupid outfits. 174 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:25,640 Because Mama threatened me. 175 00:13:26,580 --> 00:13:30,060 I thought she had the money to buy the tickets. What happened? She reinvested. 176 00:13:31,180 --> 00:13:32,180 Wouldn't that be her problem? 177 00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:34,180 Stevie, you tell my mama that. 178 00:13:34,840 --> 00:13:36,460 Cookies! Cookies! Get your cookies! 179 00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:38,760 Well, 180 00:13:39,100 --> 00:13:39,879 what are you selling? 181 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,860 Oh, some fresh gourmet cookies. 182 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:44,460 Well, I'll buy some cookies if you go out with me. 183 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:45,900 But what about my boyfriend? 184 00:13:46,820 --> 00:13:48,100 Oh, no. Just you. 185 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:50,520 Okay. 186 00:13:52,420 --> 00:13:53,420 Here you go. 187 00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:54,900 Thanks. 188 00:13:56,220 --> 00:13:58,900 Uh, Miss Parker, what are you still doing here? 189 00:14:00,460 --> 00:14:03,900 Since you shut down my operation, I'm trying to make enough money to buy the 190 00:14:03,900 --> 00:14:05,680 little Bow Wow tickets that I promised the girls. 191 00:14:06,780 --> 00:14:08,080 That's why you were selling the cookies? 192 00:14:08,540 --> 00:14:11,540 Well, at first it was about the money, but now it's about the girls. 193 00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:14,220 I don't want to disappoint them. Little Bow Wow? 194 00:14:15,540 --> 00:14:18,440 I feel terrible. How much is it a bag? 195 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:20,840 $600. 196 00:14:22,380 --> 00:14:24,360 Here's $5. Buy them a CD. 197 00:14:28,620 --> 00:14:30,880 Now, yo, come out to Andell's tomorrow night. 198 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:34,280 Little Kim's going to be hosting karaoke, and it's going to be off the 199 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:35,399 All right? 200 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,040 T, how are you getting Little Kim? 201 00:14:37,380 --> 00:14:39,520 Oh, uh, I know people that know people. 202 00:14:40,020 --> 00:14:41,020 What people? 203 00:14:41,180 --> 00:14:44,380 My homegirl, Vanika, hooks up Little Kim with all her rhinestone gear. 204 00:14:44,860 --> 00:14:46,600 But, uh, what's up with your whack outfit? 205 00:14:46,960 --> 00:14:50,440 Well, the big sister shut down my mom's operation, so we're trying to help sell 206 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:51,440 the rest of her cookies. 207 00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:53,020 Hey, T, how about supporting the cause? 208 00:14:53,220 --> 00:14:57,020 Oh, sorry. Those little crumb snatchers hit me and half the campus up yesterday. 209 00:14:58,939 --> 00:15:01,640 We'll never get rid of these here. Let's go door to door. Okay. 210 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:14,540 Randell, looks like things have turned around. 211 00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:20,080 Yeah. Ever since I added karaoke, got rid of the liquor, added burgers, and 212 00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:21,200 in that foosball table. 213 00:15:21,660 --> 00:15:23,460 So it's exactly what you didn't want. 214 00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:24,760 Exactly. 215 00:15:29,970 --> 00:15:34,050 Gee, I gotta hand it to you, the honeys and the heezy for sheezy. 216 00:15:35,410 --> 00:15:36,410 Know what I mean? 217 00:15:39,850 --> 00:15:40,850 Pace yourself, dog. 218 00:15:41,010 --> 00:15:42,010 It's early. 219 00:15:42,930 --> 00:15:44,290 Do I make cookies, anyone? 220 00:15:44,950 --> 00:15:46,550 Hey, how's it going? 221 00:15:46,770 --> 00:15:50,170 If I sell 3 ,000, I'll break even. Now, which way did Lil' Kim go? 222 00:15:52,170 --> 00:15:55,330 Would you please stop bugging her? I mean, she doesn't want your cookies. 223 00:16:07,980 --> 00:16:09,560 Dad, will you please leave me alone? 224 00:16:09,940 --> 00:16:12,480 Uh -uh. What if you're about to? I'll get your breathing room. 225 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:16,160 Make it fun, and I'll forget about that restraining order. 226 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:18,420 Thank you, girl. You're so crazy. 227 00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:20,380 No, you are. 228 00:17:16,940 --> 00:17:17,980 This girl is pretty kinky 229 00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:05,920 gonna continue our business venture unless you want to float me a little 230 00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:11,380 i give you any more money i could claim you as a dependent on my tax return well 231 00:18:11,380 --> 00:18:13,960 i guess i'm gonna have to tell the girls i can't take them to see little bye 232 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:18,320 -bye oh there's got to be another way there is you can tell them 233 00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:31,860 But you were messing with my man. 234 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,660 Girl, I don't want your tired, old -school boyfriend. 235 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:39,400 Don't make me bump you again. 236 00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:42,340 What you doing here? 237 00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:44,600 I came here for those cookies. 238 00:18:44,900 --> 00:18:46,820 Them cookies was off the hook, girl. 239 00:18:47,140 --> 00:18:48,140 Got any more? 240 00:18:49,020 --> 00:18:50,540 I guess I can whip up a few. 241 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:51,960 How many do you need? 242 00:18:52,220 --> 00:18:54,960 I take all you got. I'm going on the road tomorrow. 243 00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:57,140 Oh, well, that is a rush order. 244 00:18:57,560 --> 00:18:58,560 That's going to cost you extra. 245 00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,200 No, it won't. I'll even help you take it to the car. 246 00:19:02,740 --> 00:19:07,180 Three little Bow Wow tickets, four little Bow Wow tickets, five little Bow 247 00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:08,180 tickets. 248 00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,820 Damn, how could somebody so little be such a big pain? 249 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:15,580 Hey. Hey, girl. 250 00:19:16,380 --> 00:19:19,700 What's the matter with you? I finally got the girl tickets to see little Bow 251 00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:21,320 Wow. Good for you, Nikki. 252 00:19:21,580 --> 00:19:24,600 No, bad for me. That little mutt cost me $1 ,000. 253 00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:29,000 You should have bought the tickets when you had the money instead of being 254 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:34,640 greedy. I still say everything would have been fine if the professor hadn't 255 00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:35,640 me out to the man. 256 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:40,380 You don't get it, do you? This is all your fault. If you hadn't reinvested, 257 00:19:40,380 --> 00:19:41,380 wouldn't be in this mess. 258 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:44,800 Yeah. 259 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:50,680 Yes. I mean, uh, hey, boo. 260 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:53,780 Look, Ms. Parker, I'm... 261 00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:56,060 Sorry about turning you into the big sisters. 262 00:19:56,580 --> 00:19:59,740 I never meant to ruin the girls' chances of seeing little Bow Wow. 263 00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:01,160 Well, you did. 264 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,000 Yeah, but I'd like to make it up to you. 265 00:20:03,580 --> 00:20:04,700 You gonna take me to Hawaii? 266 00:20:08,420 --> 00:20:09,420 What's this? 267 00:20:09,780 --> 00:20:12,100 Well, I was able to get some comp tickets to the show. 268 00:20:13,580 --> 00:20:14,580 Front row center. 269 00:20:15,780 --> 00:20:16,780 Enjoy. 270 00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:24,240 I married that man. 271 00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:32,780 Free Bow Wow tickets for every bag of cookies you buy. 272 00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:37,020 Free tickets for the bag of cookies? 273 00:20:37,420 --> 00:20:38,420 What's the catch? 274 00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:39,600 No catch. 275 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:41,780 Buy a bag of cookies, get a free ticket. 276 00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,160 Cool. In that case, I'll take two. 277 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:47,700 That'll be $600. 278 00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:49,460 Thanks. You're under arrest. 279 00:20:49,700 --> 00:20:50,700 Uh -oh, 5 -0. Gotta go. 280 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,240 I appreciate it. 20333