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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:09,840 for checking out Lady Egyptian. 2 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:11,420 Don't be shy. Bye. 3 00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:12,760 Try the mask. 4 00:00:12,940 --> 00:00:13,940 It's a blast. 5 00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:16,520 Oh, I'm a poet and didn't even know it. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,640 So, Kim, it's been two days. How you hanging with your power claims? 7 00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:24,520 Oh, I'm in a zone, baby. 8 00:00:24,780 --> 00:00:26,660 This stuff is starting to put a pep in my step. 9 00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:30,420 Well, 10 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:33,360 I'm proud of you, Kim. It's hard not eating solid food for 14 days. 11 00:00:33,660 --> 00:00:34,780 Around for my great -grandmother. 12 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:36,940 T, we're talking about people with teeth. 13 00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:43,880 Look, I'm just saying, why would anybody want to drink a concoction of cranberry 14 00:00:43,880 --> 00:00:45,860 juice, cayenne pepper, and molasses? 15 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:50,460 Because it cleanses the colon, and I haven't been regular in a long time. 16 00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:56,380 Okay, that's too much information. I'm out. 17 00:00:58,580 --> 00:01:03,980 I must 18 00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:09,230 confess. A good hand massage renders me powerless. 19 00:01:15,730 --> 00:01:16,730 Don't stop. 20 00:01:18,630 --> 00:01:20,950 You are amazing. 21 00:01:22,070 --> 00:01:24,230 And I think you're incredible, too. 22 00:01:28,150 --> 00:01:30,050 Miss Parker, what happened to your associate? 23 00:01:30,270 --> 00:01:34,330 Oh, she's over there associating with my other customers. But you're my favorite 24 00:01:34,330 --> 00:01:35,330 customer. 25 00:01:36,250 --> 00:01:40,070 Just give me two bottles of that ash away, and I'll be on my way. 26 00:01:41,950 --> 00:01:43,810 Well, you get the fast discount. 27 00:01:44,410 --> 00:01:46,550 Your ash is mine. 28 00:01:49,530 --> 00:01:51,410 Well, you'll have to catch it first. 29 00:01:55,050 --> 00:01:57,230 Dang, he's getting faster. 30 00:02:50,220 --> 00:02:51,119 Look here, Nikki. 31 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:54,960 Your little ass presentation was cute and all, but where are the men that you 32 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:55,960 promised you were going to strip? 33 00:02:56,020 --> 00:02:57,020 Yeah! 34 00:02:57,140 --> 00:02:58,140 No, no. 35 00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:00,060 No. Now, you're confused. 36 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:04,340 See, what I promised was chicken strips. 37 00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:12,400 Well, you don't have those either. This little party has left me hungry and 38 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:13,400 horny. 39 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:18,500 Nikki. Huh? Your flyer said you were going to have honeys and lingerie. 40 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:21,300 and I'll go change. 41 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:24,240 Oh, take all the time you need. 42 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:25,460 I'm about to bounce. 43 00:03:26,420 --> 00:03:29,180 Nikki, why do I get the impression that you got us all here under false 44 00:03:29,180 --> 00:03:31,420 pretenses? Yeah, and you lied, too. 45 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:50,320 door to. 46 00:04:32,940 --> 00:04:36,500 Why don't you break that fast right now and have a cookie? No, Mama, just five 47 00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:39,680 more days. Besides, I feel all cleansed and energized. 48 00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:41,600 But do you feel conscious? 49 00:04:42,900 --> 00:04:47,480 I've never felt better. You guys go ahead and enjoy polluting your bodies 50 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,000 all that fat and sugar. 51 00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:08,640 Elaine, Elaine, Elaine, that's the third time this week. What is she, your new 52 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:09,640 best friend or something? 53 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:14,720 No, but since my old best friend was too cheap to buy my products, I had to 54 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:15,720 stray. 55 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,560 What do you really know about this woman? 56 00:05:17,820 --> 00:05:22,100 I know she has a big fat checkbook that she writes my name in a lot. 57 00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:26,800 I'm telling you, there's something strange about it. Because you and I both 58 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:28,100 Lady Egyptian and all that. 59 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,120 Hey, your eyebrows were back, didn't they? 60 00:05:42,660 --> 00:05:43,660 Hi, 61 00:05:43,820 --> 00:05:46,340 I'm Del, friend slash best friend. 62 00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:49,520 So what's up? 63 00:05:49,580 --> 00:05:53,380 Nikki, I'm sorry for dropping by unannounced, but I really need some more 64 00:05:53,380 --> 00:05:54,480 lotion. Already? 65 00:05:54,780 --> 00:05:58,300 You just bought four bottles. Well, girl, my skin just seems to drink it up. 66 00:05:58,300 --> 00:05:59,640 you sure you're not drinking it up? 67 00:06:01,620 --> 00:06:04,920 Hey, I've got reservations for Shea Frenchies tonight. Want to go? 68 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,800 That sounds great. And now, you want to come with us? 69 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:12,160 I only made reservations for two, but I guess they could pull up a chair and 70 00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:13,160 squeeze you in. 71 00:06:15,020 --> 00:06:18,820 So what'd you say, girl? You gonna come? No, thanks. I have plans with my real 72 00:06:18,820 --> 00:06:23,060 friends. Oh, well, tell Baskin and Robbins I said what's up! 73 00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:26,380 This is the girl crazy. 74 00:06:26,620 --> 00:06:27,620 Let me go get the stuff. 75 00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,420 Here, try this moongoo guy pin. It's sinful. 76 00:06:36,650 --> 00:06:39,590 I gotta give it to you, baby. I didn't think you had this much willpower. 77 00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:41,490 Try this tiramisu. 78 00:06:41,710 --> 00:06:42,890 It's banging. 79 00:06:44,410 --> 00:06:45,770 Is that real cream? 80 00:06:47,310 --> 00:06:50,630 Hang in there, kid. And just remember, when you're hungry, drink. 81 00:06:54,590 --> 00:06:55,590 Now what? 82 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:08,460 Miss Parker, can't you see I'm busy? 83 00:07:08,820 --> 00:07:11,520 Oh, well, what a coincidence, because I want to get busy, too. 84 00:07:12,580 --> 00:07:13,700 What do you want, Miss Parker? 85 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:16,840 Oysters. Give you any ideas? 86 00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:19,360 Yeah, I think I'll take these to go. 87 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:24,000 Hey, Lani. 88 00:07:24,340 --> 00:07:25,340 What you doing here? 89 00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:26,500 Oh, who was that? 90 00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,580 He's kind of boring. 91 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:29,120 Yeah, and he's kind of boring. 92 00:07:31,460 --> 00:07:34,060 Now, honey, you can look, but don't touch or I'll have to cut you. 93 00:07:35,980 --> 00:07:39,600 Well, after talking to you, I was inspired to take my 30 -something -year 94 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:40,600 behind back to school. 95 00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:43,300 So I enrolled here at SMC part -time. 96 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:45,080 That is great, Elaine. 97 00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:47,140 You know, there's power in education. 98 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:50,780 Amen to that. All right, girl. I'd also like to learn more about career 99 00:07:50,780 --> 00:07:54,040 opportunities with Lady Egyptian. Can we talk about it over dinner later? 100 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:55,840 Oh, well, you know what? 101 00:07:56,040 --> 00:08:00,060 I'd love to, but I already got plans with Andel. Oh, come on. It'll be my 102 00:08:00,740 --> 00:08:01,740 My next. 103 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:02,920 Free food. 104 00:08:03,340 --> 00:08:04,700 You're likely with Andel anytime. 105 00:08:13,930 --> 00:08:17,010 You've been hanging out so much with your new friend, I'm surprised you had 106 00:08:17,010 --> 00:08:18,490 to take your old friend out to dinner. 107 00:08:18,730 --> 00:08:21,630 Well, nothing says I'm sorry like a two -for -one at Sizzler. 108 00:08:21,850 --> 00:08:24,390 Hey, just because I'm full doesn't change how I feel about Elaine. 109 00:08:24,710 --> 00:08:26,030 Come on, Ann, don't ease up. 110 00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:30,050 Hey, doesn't it seem a little strange? She's always popping up, buys way too 111 00:08:30,050 --> 00:08:33,230 much of that stuff you sell, and all of a sudden she enrolls at your school? 112 00:08:33,850 --> 00:08:34,850 Stop hating. 113 00:08:35,020 --> 00:08:37,240 Yeah, she just wants an education. Ain't nothing wrong with that girl. 114 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:44,240 What in the... Surprise! 115 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:57,120 What in the hell is going 116 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,120 on in here? 117 00:08:58,220 --> 00:09:00,320 Looks like you throwing a lady Egyptian party. 118 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:02,820 No, I'm not. 119 00:09:03,140 --> 00:09:05,520 Well, then you better talk to your girl. because she's wearing your ass. 120 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,020 Where are you going? 121 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:14,940 After him. She might be crazy, but she's going to throw a party. 122 00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:20,580 Elaine, what do you think you're doing? 123 00:09:20,820 --> 00:09:22,220 I just want to help you make some money. 124 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:27,840 So you break into my apartment, steal my customers, and massage my man's hand? 125 00:09:28,660 --> 00:09:30,720 Well, his hands were a little ashy. 126 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:33,880 Then you leave his ass to me. 127 00:09:37,390 --> 00:09:38,390 Kim let me in. 128 00:09:39,170 --> 00:09:40,870 You bribed her with food, didn't you? 129 00:09:41,830 --> 00:09:45,990 I did no such thing. She thought the party was a good idea, and I sent her to 130 00:09:45,990 --> 00:09:48,750 the store for some crushed ice. She should have been back by now. 131 00:09:49,770 --> 00:09:50,830 Oh, hey, Mama. 132 00:09:51,790 --> 00:09:52,790 Want some ice? 133 00:09:52,930 --> 00:09:54,110 Tastes just like chicken. 134 00:09:56,550 --> 00:09:59,370 Kimberly Ann Parker, have you lost your mind? 135 00:09:59,610 --> 00:10:00,610 No. 136 00:10:00,910 --> 00:10:03,190 Elaine helped me realize that it's all mental. 137 00:10:03,450 --> 00:10:06,670 By snacking on this ice, I can pretend it's anything I want to be. 138 00:10:06,990 --> 00:10:09,710 Like fizzling chicken fajitas. Wanna taste? 139 00:10:09,950 --> 00:10:11,290 Careful, it's hot. 140 00:10:13,930 --> 00:10:15,990 Kim, go rest, baby. 141 00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:18,650 That stuff is cleansing your brain instead of your cold. 142 00:10:20,350 --> 00:10:21,890 Yes! Yes! 143 00:10:22,390 --> 00:10:23,390 Yes! 144 00:10:25,350 --> 00:10:27,130 Lady Egyptian is the bomb. 145 00:10:27,910 --> 00:10:29,170 Fill me another grape, baby. 146 00:10:41,670 --> 00:10:43,250 Parker, this party is great. 147 00:10:43,550 --> 00:10:45,590 And Elaine, it's been a pleasure. 148 00:10:46,070 --> 00:10:49,390 Oh, what the hay. Throw in some of that cucumber mask as well. 149 00:10:50,110 --> 00:10:51,310 It's already in the bag. 150 00:10:51,870 --> 00:10:54,790 No, I don't want to see any more ashy knuckles. You hear? 151 00:10:55,910 --> 00:10:56,910 Ash be gone. 152 00:10:58,970 --> 00:10:59,970 Bye, boo. 153 00:11:01,350 --> 00:11:03,470 Boo? Oh, that's my boo. 154 00:11:04,350 --> 00:11:07,690 Don't worry about boo. Look how much money we, I mean you, made. 155 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,270 Overstepped your boundaries in this friendship. 156 00:11:12,670 --> 00:11:15,270 I was just trying to help. And I appreciate that. 157 00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:49,260 before she took that nasty fall. 158 00:12:50,820 --> 00:12:54,560 It's just that I think the world of you. You inspire me. 159 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:55,940 I do? 160 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:59,800 Yeah. So forgive me for trying to be like you. 161 00:13:04,460 --> 00:13:05,460 Girl, 162 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:06,980 this is some good tea. 163 00:13:07,260 --> 00:13:08,460 Tastes like hot L .A. 164 00:13:08,680 --> 00:13:14,400 So anyway, Nikki, thank you for being so kind to me. 165 00:13:14,980 --> 00:13:15,980 Mm -hmm. 166 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,620 Yeah, girl, give me some more tea, please. 167 00:13:18,740 --> 00:13:19,740 Sure. 168 00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:21,080 Here you go. 169 00:13:25,900 --> 00:13:26,900 Elaine, sit down. 170 00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:31,040 Girl, you're making me dizzy. 171 00:13:32,140 --> 00:13:33,780 Nikki, are you okay? 172 00:13:36,220 --> 00:13:37,220 Yes. 173 00:13:38,140 --> 00:13:39,380 I'm a little woozy. 174 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,700 You should probably get some rest. 175 00:13:42,980 --> 00:13:44,500 I'll just talk to you later. 176 00:13:44,980 --> 00:13:45,980 Okay. 177 00:14:24,590 --> 00:14:25,590 Miss Parker? 178 00:14:27,630 --> 00:14:28,630 Miss Parker? 179 00:14:30,590 --> 00:14:34,350 Okay, I got your page, your email, and your fax. 180 00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:37,610 What? 181 00:14:37,890 --> 00:14:43,310 Oh, wait a minute. This is probably another one of your little tricks. But 182 00:14:43,310 --> 00:14:45,910 what? Stanley Ogilvie is not falling for it. 183 00:14:49,950 --> 00:14:51,230 No siree, Bob. 184 00:14:53,450 --> 00:14:54,450 I'm just going to leave. 185 00:14:57,250 --> 00:14:59,070 Okay, Miss Parker, what are you up to? 186 00:15:00,310 --> 00:15:01,310 Miss Parker? 187 00:15:01,810 --> 00:15:03,630 Hi, Professor Ogilvie. 188 00:15:04,430 --> 00:15:05,830 I'm glad you got my communication. 189 00:15:06,730 --> 00:15:08,530 Good God. 190 00:15:09,170 --> 00:15:10,790 Why are you dressed like Miss Parker? 191 00:15:11,290 --> 00:15:13,910 You're looking at the new and improved Nikki Parker. 192 00:15:14,450 --> 00:15:15,450 You like? 193 00:15:15,790 --> 00:15:16,790 Yes. 194 00:15:17,630 --> 00:15:18,630 No. 195 00:15:20,390 --> 00:15:21,390 Maybe. 196 00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:28,280 Miss Parker. Miss Parker, please wake up. Oh, she's going to be out for a 197 00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:30,240 What have you done to her, Elaine? 198 00:15:30,540 --> 00:15:33,640 Oh, you really should start calling me Nikki, honey. 199 00:15:36,460 --> 00:15:40,380 You are as crazy as Miss Parker. 200 00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:42,280 Just call the police. 201 00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:43,720 No crazy, Abu. 202 00:16:02,990 --> 00:16:08,370 me but now you are too selfish so now i'm just gonna have to take it we could 203 00:16:08,370 --> 00:16:13,350 have been partners just like me and my sister before she took that nasty fall 204 00:16:13,350 --> 00:16:20,270 i can't believe this is happening to me oh please isn't this 205 00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:27,270 what you always wanted to be tied up with your man if you have a gun please 206 00:16:27,270 --> 00:16:28,270 shoot me now 207 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,100 the darn teacher said before she took that nasty 208 00:17:14,060 --> 00:17:15,060 and be real quiet. 209 00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:07,920 Come back to kill us. 210 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,180 I am not your boo. 211 00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:27,520 Okay, baby. 212 00:19:30,140 --> 00:19:31,860 Andale, how did you know Elaine was crazy? 213 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:35,980 Oh, I always knew she was strange, so I did some checking. I found out she's a 214 00:19:35,980 --> 00:19:39,500 psychotic fool wanted for kidnapping, fraud, and attempted murder. 215 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:41,980 Plus, she's just playing crazy. 216 00:19:43,780 --> 00:19:45,080 Thanks for having my back. 217 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:46,700 You're my girl, Andale. 218 00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:50,420 That's what friends are for. 219 00:20:15,790 --> 00:20:16,729 How's the cleansing going? 220 00:20:16,730 --> 00:20:19,550 Oh, it's going great. I don't even crave solid foods anymore. 221 00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:21,070 Oh, well, what are you blending? 222 00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:22,430 Solid foods. 223 00:20:24,690 --> 00:20:27,110 This is my version of the cleanser diet. 224 00:20:27,370 --> 00:20:29,890 This way I still get my nutrients and vitamins. 225 00:20:30,230 --> 00:20:36,710 Oh, so I'm guessing vitamin B is for burgers, vitamin D is for Doritos, and 226 00:20:36,710 --> 00:20:37,850 vitamin C is for cookies. 227 00:20:41,410 --> 00:20:43,310 Oh, girl, that sounds great. 228 00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:45,760 Blow me a glass. Mama needs to go on a diet. 229 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:58,779 Pound cake? 230 00:20:58,780 --> 00:20:59,780 Crab cake? 231 00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:02,720 That's mine. 232 00:21:03,100 --> 00:21:05,480 She said drink and not get dumb. Sorry. 233 00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,440 Oh, how's a little bit of sugar in this cake? 234 00:21:10,580 --> 00:21:11,720 It's a tongue twister. 235 00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:13,680 He has a big face. 16784