Original subtitles

I guess when they say final notice, they mean it.

Hello? Do you like scary movies, Nikki?

Oh, I can take them or leave them.

Wait a minute. How do you know my name?

Pervert!

Listen, creep, I'm calling the police.

No!

You better stay away from my child.

Why don't you go over to the table and enjoy the meal I prepared for you?

Let me get out this thing.

A gorgeous, sexy young lady's birthday.

Okay. But after we do that, we'll discuss your birthday.

I'm just playing with you. Man, the get -together at your daddy's house is gonna

be on.

Ah! Ew! There's a bug in my joint. Gotcha!

You can't get this playboy.

That's why I don't even try.

Yeah, I like that.

Man,

that's the fifth time somebody's hit me. Somebody's gonna get hurt up in here.

A sign that says, hit me.

Gotcha!

Professor Ogilvie, are you coming to my birthday party?

Well, will your mother be there? Be where?

At the altar?

No, at my party.

Of course I'll be there. In that case, have fun.

All right,

I'll drop by your little soiree, but only for a minute. I have other plans.

Well, don't drop by empty -handed. I'm registered at Target.

ride, you know.

Out of a fairy tale.

All right, Miss Kimberly, bring it on.

Come on, Moe, and show your wicked stepsisters who's worthy of a prince.

I'm ready for the ball, y 'all.

Moe, you look beautiful. Thank you. I look just like Brandy did in Cinderella.

Girl, you trippin'. No, I look better. All I need now is a carriage.

I got a hoop that you can use.

Kim, girl, I don't know how to thank you enough.

Cash will do. Girl, I'm Cinderella, not your fairy godmother.

Come on, let's get in our costumes.

We're going to look good.

Do we have that much time?

Getting on my nerves.

Thanks again, girl.

Oh, no problemo.

Oh, Kim, I may be a little late for your party, because you know I got to make

an entrance.

Well, of course you're going to make an entrance. How else were you going to get

into the party?

to trade these glass slippers in for some flip -flops.

Uh -oh.

Notorious K .I .M. better watch out because Lil Lil came up in here. What?

You look so nice.

Thank you.

Happy birthday, girl. Hey.

Did you get me a gift? Of course.

Good, because I was checking to see if you were a good witch, bad witch, or a

cheap witch.

It's going to kill me. What?

Okay. Okay, listen. Listen, baby. Don't worry. People act crazy on Halloween,

all right?

But you are safe with your daddy. So just relax and have a good time.

Come on, girl. Let's get some punch. Yeah, let's get it before your mama puts

some aloe vera in it. Woo!

Mel, our plan is working great.

You should have seen Kim's face when you left the house. Huh?

Yeah, it was funny how you asked for now and later. You went old school on her.

That wasn't me. I couldn't make it. I had to work late.

think somebody's trying to get it. What? Oh, like a stalker?

You know what, Kim? Don't worry.

It is probably just some guy messing with you.

Although a lot of murders do happen on Halloween.

You know, like in foreign countries really far, far, far away.

I'm gonna go get snacks.

He's gonna kill me!

Somehow I don't think a killer would ring the doorbell.

You got to calm down, okay? Daddy's going to take care of everything, all

He told me the same thing 20 years ago.

Hey, good to see you, man. Come on in and have a drink.

I just stopped by to give Kim her gift.

Wow.

Looked like you and Nikki were ready to jump the broom.

Excuse me?

or the receipt for your costume in your mailbox.

Don't you know that's a federal offense?

Not between husband and wife.

I think I will take that drink.

Make it a double.

Oh, hell, give me the whole bottle.

You know what? I'm tripping.

Today is my birthday, and I'm just going to enjoy my party.

That's right.

Yeah, because if there was a killer, he would sneak through the window and hack

you with a...

don't let your chainsaw... Or he'll just bust through the closet and grab you by

your neck and strangle you until your eyes pop out.

No, he'll grab a big butcher knife and just get one clean swipe.

Come on, Kim, don't even listen to him because a real killer would just blow

your brains out like... Thanks,

I feel much better.

You know, this is how all those scary movies start out. A group of friends in

big house on Halloween.

Case of mistaken identity, a killer on the loose. Yep, yep, yep. Next thing you

know, we'll hit thunder and lightning.

stabbed a note in our door saying he was going to get me.

Well, that doesn't pertain to me.

Yeah, I'll be on my way.

Bye, boo.

Don't wait up for me.

Listen, listen, everybody, come on now. This is supposed to be a party, okay?

Now I'm going to go get the cake. Baby, why don't you open up some of your

gifts? Okay.

Good.

Hey, Kim, open up this big box first.

Wow.

This must be for Mama.

No, baby.

They don't give a box for Taco Bell coupons.

I've been opening it. You're taking too long.

Yeah, hurry up, girl. I want to see what it is.

Hey, Kim, if you like it, it was for me.

Wow, it's a dolly, and it looks just like me.

It'd be cute if it didn't have all these pins in it.

Kim, that's a poodle doll.

Stop playing, Hakeem. Turn the lights back on.

I didn't touch the lights.

And the power's really out.

I must have knocked the power out.

Daddy, somebody's at the door.

Okay, just calm down, baby girl, okay? It's probably just a trick -or -treater.

Look, I'll go check.

Mom, I'm scared.

Don't be.

Nobody's going to mess with Nicky Parker's baby.

But what if something happens to you?

Then you have Andale.

Andale who?

Okay, relax, everybody. No one's out there.

I came in here. I need you to get the candles and the flashlights. I'm going

go down to the basement and check the circuit breaker.

She should not stay here to protect the women and children.

Come on, man. Quit being scary.

Kim, go open the curtain so we can get some light in here.

front, but nobody answered the door, so I came around the back.

My car wouldn't start.

Oh, you know what that means.

What, the professor drives a lemon?

No. The killer killed his car. Now he's going to kill us.

Well, he's not going to kill me.

I'm calling the auto club.

Where's the phone?

It's over here.

Oh, no.

It's dead.

So go get it.

Uh -uh, girl, not in this weather. Shoot, I just got my hair done.

I'm not going out there to be gutted by some deranged killer.

Miss Parker, you go.

Y 'all all right?

No. The phone is dead and so are we.

We? Oh, he's not after us. He's after you.

T, why don't you go out to Niecy's car and get her cell phone?

Uh -uh.

I've seen all three Scream movies. Either there ain't no brothers, or

the first ones to go.

Look, y 'all, my cell phone is upstairs in my purse. I'm gonna go get it,

because, see, I'm not afraid of no boogeyman.

Anybody want to go with me?

Mo? Yeah? Get to stepping.

You guys, this is making me too nervous. Look, I got to go to the bathroom.

Come on, Hakeem. Uh -oh, I just went.

I need you to guard the door, fool.

I

don't

like this.

People are starting to disappear.

Someone should go find me.

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing.

myself. You're pathetic.

Pathetic, but alive.

Whatever.

Wait a minute. I hear something out there.

You're right.

There is something out there.

I'm tired of this, Professor. I'm going out.

Godspeed.

All right, all right.

I'll go. With any luck, the killer will get me.

We're just a casualty.

You know what? You guys are messed up.

This is my birthday. What did I ever do to you guys? Oh, well, let's see.

In kindergarten, you superglued me to the seesaw.

That was only to keep you from falling off.

And thanks to you, I hate showering alone.

What? I told you all you got to do is page it, brother.