Original subtitles

Hey, baby.

Hey. I didn't know you were working today.

Oh, what is that with Professor Ogilvie?

Oh, probably planning the bachelor party for when the professor and I get

married.

Mama, maybe you should take this book back and get one on psychology.

Just ring me up. Can you break 100?

Sure.

$25. Where's the rest?

Oh, you wanted exact change.

Hey, Professor Ogilvy. Oh, hey, Miss Parker.

Oh, so why are you with all these kids that are almost as cute as ours would

Well, they're involved in a mentor program that I organized, sort of like a

brother or big sister program.

Oh, well, I could use some guidance from a big, strong brother.

Oh, Miss Parker, let's not offend the children.

Or me.

So, uh, how do I become a mentor?

Uh, that's very generous of you, Miss Parker, but, um, it just so happens that

we really don't need any mentors right now.

But, Professor, you said we had a waiting list of kids.

Uh, well, you must be mistaken, wouldn't you? Don't you remember? You begged me

to join.

You said we desperately needed more mentors.

U .S. professor.

Good looking out, Woody.

Woody, could you step into my office?

What's wrong? You got a bum knee?

She was being polite. That's a curtsy. Uh -huh. Well, a curtsy to you, too.

Your house is so big, Ms. Parker.

Oh, I know. Sometimes I get lost going from the bedroom to the kitchen.

Thank you, Shaquilla. It's nice to know someone appreciates it.

What are you sewing?

Oh, I'm making our outfits for the freshman mother and daughter tea at our

school.

I wish I had a mommy to take me to tea, but she passed away.

Now it's just me and my daddy.

Oh, you poor thing.

Don't you worry.

You have me now.

How about some milk and cookies?

Thank you. Mama would have liked that.

How old are you?

Eighteen. I'm twelve.

Eighteen is a little bit too old to be living at home, isn't it?

You're a little too young to be in my business.

Why are you so short?

What?

I mean, like, Miss Parker's so tall, your daddy must be short.

He happens to be very tall.

Really? Mm -hmm.

Well, you know what they say. Mama's baby, daddy's maybe.

Here's your milk and cookies.

So, uh, how you two getting along?

Like...

Oh, yeah, she's real special.

So, Shaquille, how would you like to get a manicure? Cool, I'll go get my coat.

Oh, Kim, baby, why don't you sit this one out? This is so little Shaquille and

can bond.

Oh, Mama, my nails need bonding. I need a fill, a wrap, airbrush, maybe even add

a few charms.

Wouldn't it be cheaper just to get a new hair?

Mama! Look, Kim, this is our first day together, and we need to get to know

other better.

Lord, why you at it? You never help me.

Come on, Shakila.

Goodbye, Kim. I know we're going to be the best of friends.

Oh, isn't she a doll?

Yeah, Chucky.

Stevie, I can't take it anymore.

All my mama talks about is Shaquille.

Shaquille needs her nails done. Shaquille needs a new wardrobe.

Kim, give Shaquille a kidney.

Shaquille, Shaquille, Shaquille.

Kim, Kim, Kim.

Do I detect a hint of jealousy?

No, it's pure hate.

But Shaquille seems like such a sweet little girl.

Ha, frontin'. She's just bad.

Bad to the bone.

All right, well, can you just, um...

Give me a printer cartridge so I can go home and finish my history paper.

Wait a minute. We're in the same history class.

What paper?

The one that's due Monday.

I got a paper due Monday?

I haven't been to an amusement park in years.

Were you scared on the roller coaster, Professor?

Not until you grabbed my thigh.

Hey, I really like this thing.

Oh, it's tight, huh? I got it for winning the spelling bee.

I showed you a bag of marbles for it.

Marbles? What century are you from?

It really should be mine, you know. I'm a better speller than you.

You are not.

Spell dichlorodiphenyltrichlorothane.

Nobody can spell that.

D -I -C -H -L -O -R -O -D -I -P -H -E -N -Y -L -T -R -I -C -H -L -O -R -O -E -C

-H -A -N -E.

Use it in a sentence.

I use dichloro, diphenyl, trichloro, ethane to kill my pet dog.

Professor Ogilvie!

Professor Ogilvie!

What's wrong?

Oh, don't we make a cute family?

Hey, Joy, would you like to come to the movies tonight? Miss Parker and

Professor Ogilvie can come with us.

I ran into Veronica at the gynecologist, and she said she was going out of town

for the whole week.

That's my story, and I'm stinking to it.

There's a pack of Pokemon cards in it for you.

We'll be there.

We'll see you later tonight.

Let's go, Shaquille.

Oh, Joey, you're a good speller.

Can you spell sellout?

Keep an eye on Shaquilla.

But, Mama. I'll be right back.

So, how much money do you make here?

That's none of your business.

Whatever it is, I hope you're saving it.

And what's it to you?

You're going to need it when you move out.

What are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere.

So young, so naive.

Yeah, whatever.

Wait a minute. Where's that CD?

You took it, didn't you? No, I didn't. Mm -hmm. You probably slipped it into

your backpack.

Did you take the CD?

No, I didn't take anything. Here, look.

A geometry book.

Scriptures for young adults.

Isn't this cute?

It's a drawing.

My new family.

Me, Mommy, and Kim.

No CD.

I think you owe Shaquille an apology.

No, she owes me $12 .99.

Kim, sorry.

That's okay. Jesus loves you.

Come on, Shaquille.

I've got to get you home.

I'm sorry you lost your spelling bee pen, Joey.

But once you taste my world -famous triple -scoop double -fudge marshmallow

sundae, you'll forget all about the pen. Come on, you can help me make them.

You have a very nice plate here, Professor.

Oh, thank you, Shakila.

So does that hallway lead to the rest of it?

No, no, this is it.

Um, Shakila, I, um, I saw what you did at the movie theater.

I don't know what you mean.

I'm going to go help Miss Parkwood. No.

No, I saw you take Joey's spelling bee pen.

Now give it back and all will be forgiven.

I really don't know what you're talking about.

Okay. Either you tell or I will.

Professor, did you read about that teacher who lost his job because of

that happened between him and one of his students?

I would hate to think what a rumor like that could do to somebody.

Are you threatening me?

How could a 12 -year -old girl threaten a 40 -year -old confirmed bachelor like

yourself?

40?

Miss Parker?

Try this.

It's amazing what you can do with a can of whipped cream, isn't it, Professor?

I believe Shakila has something to tell you.

I love you, Miss Parker.

I love you too, Puddin'.

I saw Shaquilla take Joey's spelling bee pen while we were at the movie theater.

No, I didn't. I would never do that.

Professor, are you sure?

Yes, I'm sure.

She said she wanted it.

Shaquilla. I didn't take it. Last time I saw it, Joey put it in his backpack.

But I didn't put it in my backpack.

Why don't you take a look, Joey?

Here it is.

See? It was all just a big misunderstanding.

I want to go home.

Are you sure?

Uh -huh.

Okay, baby. Why don't you and the professor make up? Give him a goodnight

I'm gonna get you.

Come to Shaquille's dance class.

She was the best one there.

Uh, show Kim that agente thing you did.

Isn't she great?

Oh, yeah, she's a regular Peter Pan.

Never took me to dance class.

I know.

And Shaquille, it was my chance to right some of the wrongs I did with you.

Shaquille, would you care for some German chocolate cake?

That's my favorite. I know. I made it last night. I'll take a piece.

I thought you didn't like German chocolate cake. I don't, but since I

dance lessons, I figured I could at least get some cake.

Parker residence.

Shakila?

What have you done with Miss Parker?

Put her on the phone.

I'm sorry. No one lives here by that name.

Listen, you devil child.

You booby -trapped my patio, didn't you?

your paper, Kim? Oh, the title page is tight.

Kim, you know if you don't finish, you're gonna miss the mother -daughter

And you know how much I'm looking forward to it. Don't worry, I'm gonna

all -nighter. Oh, good. And you don't mind if Shaquille sleeps in your bed? I

don't. I knew you wouldn't. You're sweet like that.

I'll go change the sheets for you, baby.

You ain't sleep.

It's just a matter of time before my mama catches on to you. I don't think

She loves me.

Everybody loves me.

This just in. I can't stand you.

I was really hoping we could be friends.

Ashley, that's a lie.

You're amusing, but your time is up. You've got to go.

Nikki deserves much better, and that would be me.

Oh, you're a weirdo.

You have no idea.

Maya has the worst dream.

Good morning, everyone.

Oh, no, I'm not dreaming.

Oh, stop it, Kim. Did you finish your paper?

Just about. I guess I dozed off.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What's wrong?

My file is gone.

Maybe you hit the delete button by accident.

Or maybe somebody else did it while I was asleep.

Ms. Parker.

Kim, why do you insist on messing with this poor girl? Because she deleted my

paper. Wow. would she do that? Because she's evil.

Mama, put the eye on her like you do me.

Shaquilla, look me in the eye.

Did you delete Kim's paper?

On my mother's grave, I didn't do it.

Kim, are you happy? Never mind. I'm out of here. I'm going to my daddy's. Well,

what about the mother -daughter tea?

Oh, you can still go with Shaqzilla.

I got a paper to finish.

Kim, let's talk about this.

No, Mama.

All you care about is little orphan Annie.

Something's wrong with that girl.

Everybody sees it but you.

Just a word of advice.

Don't turn your back on Shakila, or she'll kill you.

Boy, does she have a mouth on her.

I was really looking forward to us going to the T.

You still have me?

You're right.

At least I'll be with one of my girls.

What would you give me if I gave you a basket full of kids?

I'd give you a basket full of hugs.

Thank you, Mama.

Anyway, mothers and daughters, we must continue to love, support, and cherish

one another.

I hope we always have as strong a bond as we do now.

What a great relationship Mrs. Gower has with her daughters, Stacy and Michelle.

And Andrea Dornita.

Sarah Nguyen.

Sherry Terry Johnson.

Well, I don't know how you're still walking.

My own mother wasn't able to be here today. She's in Cannes on vacation.

Of course, she was just on vacation, but am I bitter? No, no, no. Why would I be

bitter about a woman who's rarely had enough time for me anyway?

Well, you know what? You know what, Mom?

Forget you. You probably don't even drink tea anyway.

Well, shall we move on?

I know Kim isn't here, but would you like to say anything anyway?

No. Well, I think I will.

Okay. In that case, let me introduce our next mom, who is also a freshman here

at Santa Monica, Nikki Parker.

Sometimes things happen in life you don't expect.

Like I didn't expect this tea to serve just plain tea.

But I'm all right with that.

Like I am with the sweet little girl God blessed me with.

And that sweet, wonderful, unexpected little girl turned into my best friend.

The one who has always got my back.

My pudding, my daughter, Kimberly Ann.

Cute!

one who cares about you.

I'm the one who's perfect.

I'm your daughter, not that pathetic little loser. It's me, me, me.

It's okay, Shaquille. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.

I know, baby.

I know.

Shaquille's evil.

Later we found out that although Shaquille was a black bad seed, she had

reasons.

Her mother wasn't dead.

She had run out on Shaquille and her father two years ago.

Fortunately, Professor Ogilvy was able to get her the help she needed.

Part of her therapy was to admit to all what she had done.

Maybe when she's all better, she'll come clean about my history paper.

Hopefully.

Despite everything, Mama's not giving up on Shakila.

She's committed to being there for her.

And so am I.

I wonder if I can get her to teach me that his minute thing.

I'm sorry you lost your spelling bee, Joey.

I'm sorry you lost your spelling bee, Joey.

I'm sorry you lost your spelling bee, Joey.

But once you face my world... I said it right! You did not!

There you go.