Original subtitles

Oh, I love Boogie.

Boogie... Hey.

Hey, who are you?

I'm Buddy Rich, world -famous drummer.

We already got one.

You ever hear of a drummer called Animal?

Are you kidding? All drummers are animals.

Now, where's my dressing room?

It's up the stairs. They're getting it ready for you.

What was that?

Somebody touching my chair?

No, no, no.

We're having power trouble.

Nothing to worry about.

Good. I just won't sit down.

Let's come up and show with our very special guest.

It's time to put on makeup.

It's time to dress up right.

It's time to raise the curtain on the puppet show tonight.

Why do we always come here? I guess we'll never know.

It's like a kind of torture to have to watch the show.

It's time to get things started on the most sensational, inspirational,

celebrational, motivational, this is what we call The Muppet Show!

Thank you, thank you, thank you! Hi -ho, and welcome again to The Muppet

Show, where our special guest tonight is the world's greatest drummer, Mr. Buddy

Rich!

Yes, but first, to get things rolling...

Scooter? Yeah, boss? What happened to the lights?

They went out.

Oh, good.

Okay, to kick things off on the Muppet Show, here's a little sunshine.

Good day, sunshine.

Good day, sunshine.

Good day, sunshine.

I need to laugh.

And when the sun is out, I've got something I can laugh about.

I feel good in a special way.

I'm in love and it's a sunny day.

Good day, sunshine.

Good day, sunshine.

Good day, sunshine.

We take a walk.

The sun is shining down.

my feet as they touch the ground.

All right, all you flowers, gather around you cute things and sing!

Ready!

Folks, we just blew a fuse.

I'm sorry, Fozzie. I'm not Fozzie. Oh, Gonzo. Yes, I'm sorry about that.

Listen, Scooter, would you go get us some flashlights? Okay, boss.

Okay, now listen. Everybody sing.

How can we sing Good Day Sunshine when it's dark?

Well, think of something. I've got to go help Blue Regard with the fuse box.

Good luck.

Remember, it's always darkest just before dawn.

Well, here are the flashlights.

Somebody play something.

Would you give me a flashlight?

Thank you. How do you work this?

Oh, yeah.

Dancing in the dark, till the tune ends. We're dancing in the

dark, till the tune ends. We're waltzing in the wonder of why

we're here. Sorry.

I'm hurry, fly, we're here.

To brighten up the night.

I have you, love.

Hey, let go. That's my fish.

I'm sorry, miss.

Sorry, fish.

Dancing in the dark.

You think this is better than their usual show?

Of course not. Can't hold a candle to it.

find that fuse?

I can't see anything.

There's all these wires in the way.

Well, hurry up. The audience is getting restless.

Oh, we don't want them to go nighty -night.

I'll just take out some of these wires and like... Are

you okay?

I think the fuse box bit me.

I don't want to play with fuses anymore, okay?

Okay, Gorg. Why don't you just go get some candles, okay? Okay.

And good news, Chief.

Yeah? It wasn't Miss Piggy's hot plate after all.

Oh? Her hair dryer then?

No. It was that creep Gonzo. He was trying to air condition his closet.

Nothing but the best for my mildew collection.

You're disgusting.

Would you guys knock it off back there? We got a show to do.

Now, what can I send out there on a dark stage?

Why don't you introduce the black cat acrobats of Kankakee?

But they're not here.

Nobody will ever notice.

Here's a Muppet newsflash.

It's too dark in here to read the news, boy.

Can we have a bigger candle, please?

Thank you very much. That's much better.

With the discovery of gold, local residents are expecting a boom.

Excuse me, buddy, can I see you?

Kermit, that's the dumbest thing anyone said tonight.

Listen, I just wanted to tell you we'll have the lights back on soon.

Don't worry about me. I got eyes like a cat.

A really clumsy cat.

The crisis is over. When can you do your number?

Oh, anytime you want me to, Kermit. Uh -huh. Do you need to talk to the band?

Who needs a band?

Oh, no band?

Fantastic. Just you and a drum kit.

Who needs drums?

No drums?

No drums. We just go right into it.

You know what? You should be doing this on stage.

To the stage. To the stage.

dark to see this show.

Oh, see?

And my hearing aid is busted so I can't hear it. Oh, you must be having a

wonderful time.

No, I'm having a wonderful time.

Hey, Chief? Yeah? I rigged up an emergency work light.

Oh, good going, Scooter. How'd you do that? Well, remember how Beauregard

all those wires out of the fuse box and got a big shock?

Yeah. Well, I just put two and two together and... Huh?

Is he all right? Well, sure.

I think he got a real charge out of it.

Listen, I just don't want him to get run down or anything.

Are you okay, Bo?

I'm fine.

Did I do something wrong?

Why do I have this urge to sing Happy Birthday?

Come in.

Hey, Bo.

How you doing?

Oh, just terrible.

The electric stuff won't go through the wires.

And everybody's blaming me.

Oh, you're the one that's caused this mess.

You see what I mean?

Everybody's out to get me.

Can I use your window?

Well, I know it's bad, Bo, but don't jump.

Jump? I was just going to take a nap on the fire escape.

That is, unless you know any inspirational songs.

Inspirational songs?

Have I got the song for you.

When you think you've hit the bottom and you're feeling really

low, you mustn't feel discouraged.

There's always one step further down you can go.

Charlie, I'm starting to get inspired.

When you're lying in the gutter, feeling just a

bit unsure, just wait until...

Tomorrow, you may be lying flat -faced down in a sewer.

Golly, think of all those sewers!

Don't be afraid of a little rumble. No!

What's that for goodness sake? It's nothing!

Just remember, one little rumble started the Frisco quake.

What? Take it, folks!

I've been living on a park.

bench eating grass cause I've no dough your luck will change manana

you may be six feet under helping it grow so just remember

when you're lower than low there's always one step further down oh yeah

there's always one step further down there's always one step further

down you can go

Thanks, Mr. Rich.

I feel a lot worse.

I like to help.

Time once again for Veterinarian's Hospital, the continuing story of a

who's gone to the dark.

Where are you guys?

We're over here.

Oh, Dr.

Bob, it's so dark, you can't see your hand in front of your face.

That's okay. I remember what it looks like. It's brown and has these five

things sticking out.

Dr.

Bob, cancel the operation. It's too dangerous.

Nobody can see anything.

Well, if that includes the audience, it'll be the safest bit we've ever done.

Just a second.

That's a miner's lamp.

Yes, and a pick.

Now, where's the patient?

You can't use a pick on the patient.

I count on the patient's pocket.

Now, where is he? Right here, Dr. Bob.

He was trying to fix the power line and got a severe shock.

When he sees who his doctor is, he'll get another one.

And not that kind of shock.

He's had 10 ,000 volts.

Gee, that should be enough to get him elected.

What was he running for?

The hills, if he had any sense.

Not votes.

Volts. Oh, in that case... Run some volts through him again.

Again? Yes, it's called revolting.

It certainly is.

And so we come to the end of another Veterinarian's Hospital.

Tune in next week when you'll hear Dr.

Bob say... Listen, if it's still dark when the patient comes to, give him

What? That's a ballpoint pen with a little light. What good is that?

He can see to sign a check.

Thank you.

Has not anything to show more fair.

Any more fairs?

Any more fairs?

Why cabbies try to patch us before they overtakes. I stitch me flippin' hand

out, then I jams on all me brakes.

The jackal taxi drivers can only swear and cuss.

Behind that monarch of the road. Observer of the highway code. That big

-wheeler. Scarlet painted. Land and transport. Diesel engine. Nice little

sparrow on your bus.

Although it spoils the ride.

So I can shout, get out of it, we'll fall right up inside.

We don't have much for wages.

We only want special.

Cut down all the stages.

And stick up all the stairs.

If tickets cost a pound a piece, why should you make a fuss?

It's worth it just to ride inside.

At 20 foot long by 10 foot wide. Say that Monica through.

Observer of the highway code.

Listen,

Bunsen, for once your goofy inventions had better do some good because we've

to get the lights going around here.

Not to worry, Mr. Kermit. I will easily power all of the lights with this

portable generator.

This is portable?

Yes, it's a miracle of microelectronics.

What's it run on?

Batteries? Gasoline?

No indeedy -doody. This is the age of beaker power.

Soon electricity will be coursing through the entire theater.

All right, Beaky, start running.

Minor adjustments.

The connections may not be quite right yet.

Oh, that's better.

Come in.

Excusez -moi, but did you... All right, Miss Piggy, come on in.

I just had to come in and tell you that I think you're a truly great drummer.

Why, thank you, Miss Piggy.

I think you're a very large singer.

I beg your pardon?

Oh, nothing. I'm really glad you came by. Oh? I have a question for you. Oh,

yes. Well, you know, I'm kind of interested in karate.

Oh, buddy dear.

Say no more, of course I shall give you some pointers.

I am a pink belt.

Really?

Buddy dear, first of all, you should put away those silly nilly boards.

Beginners can only hurt themselves on that sort of thing.

peaceful activity.

The beginner need not dwell on the violence and aggression.

First, you must learn to be at peace with it.

Holy guacamole!

Black belt.

Gotcha. Speaking of black.

It's too bad lard doesn't... Hey,

where'd you learn to aim so good without lights?

Oh, just, uh, chop in the dark.

Okay, good old Bunsen and Beaker. That generator has just saved the day, all

right. Let's see, uh, Swedish chef on stage next. Swedish chef, please.

Yeah, well, thanks, chef. I'm very pleased, too.

Hey. Hey, listen, guys.

What's the matter?

Oh, I'm afraid poor little Beaker is getting tired.

We'll have to throw the overdrive lever.

Oh, what does the overdrive lever do?

It puts an angry tiger in the wheel with him.

... ... ... ...

...

I understand for the show's finale you want me to do some kind of a drum

Oh, yeah. I just love drum battles.

Okay. Who do I battle? The other guy. You know, the one that loses.

Animal. Animal. That's really his name.

He looks like a sore loser.

If this chain breaks, you'll be a sore winner.

Listen, I'll just go introduce you. Floyd, get Animal ready.

Animal.

He's ready.

Drum battle!

Drum battle!

Drum battle! Drum battle!

And now, ladies and gentlemen, the drum battle of the century.

Yes, in one corner, our own ever -popular animal.

And in the other corner, the Muppet Show's own fearless guest star, ladies

gentlemen, Mr. Buddy.

Show the lights again.

Okay, well, we've just about come down to the end of another one, but before we

go, let us bring back our wonderful guest star. Hey, gentlemen, wait till I

this thing off, okay?

Ladies and gentlemen, the world's greatest drummer, Mr. Buddy Redshift!

I'm sorry about the battle of the drums, buddy. Oh, that's all right, Kermit.

I'm just glad it wasn't the battle of the pianos. That little devil would have

killed me.

lights went out. In the dark. Where else will it be?