All language subtitles for The Muppet Show s05e14 Carol Burnett

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,230 --> 00:00:06,610 Hi, I'm Brian Henson. 2 00:00:06,910 --> 00:00:11,390 This episode of The Muppet Show stars Carol Burnett. How have you know I am a 3 00:00:11,390 --> 00:00:12,390 lady? 4 00:00:12,790 --> 00:00:19,570 This particular episode was also a favorite of The Muppet Show writers 5 00:00:19,570 --> 00:00:23,970 they won an Emmy for Best Writing on a comedy variety show. Carol, I realized 6 00:00:23,970 --> 00:00:25,510 that that first number was a little shaky. 7 00:00:25,930 --> 00:00:29,410 Shaky? Shaky? You call that number shaky? 8 00:00:30,170 --> 00:00:34,320 You may wonder what... was the sophisticated concept that won this Emmy 9 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:39,180 for them? Well, the idea was that everybody would be dancing from the very 10 00:00:39,180 --> 00:00:42,300 beginning of the show to the very end, and the whole episode would be a dance 11 00:00:42,300 --> 00:00:44,300 marathon. Here's your partner. 12 00:00:45,460 --> 00:00:49,200 Sounds like an incredibly stupid and easy idea. 13 00:00:49,580 --> 00:00:51,580 What else could happen? Two, three, dip! 14 00:00:52,580 --> 00:00:58,400 Put it all together, and it makes for really one of the all -time great 15 00:00:58,400 --> 00:00:59,400 of The Muppet Show. 16 00:01:10,510 --> 00:01:12,970 I'm Carol Burnett, and I'm supposed to be doing the Muppets show tonight. 17 00:01:13,230 --> 00:01:16,870 Hey, Carol Burnett, boy, are you in luck. 18 00:01:17,130 --> 00:01:18,990 Oh, why? Has the show been canceled? 19 00:01:21,190 --> 00:01:26,110 No, we're having a dance marathon tonight. See, I got my number and 20 00:01:26,550 --> 00:01:29,870 A dance marathon. My, what a fresh idea. 21 00:01:31,230 --> 00:01:32,670 It's after the show, I suppose. 22 00:01:33,090 --> 00:01:34,850 No, during. 23 00:01:35,450 --> 00:01:37,450 Oh, during. 24 00:01:38,230 --> 00:01:40,390 You mean while I'm supposed to be doing my sketch? 25 00:01:42,860 --> 00:01:43,860 Well, 26 00:01:44,460 --> 00:01:46,860 yeah, but don't worry. You won't bother us. 27 00:01:47,380 --> 00:01:49,160 Why did I know you were going to say that? 28 00:01:51,100 --> 00:01:54,180 Terrific! Another contestant! What number would you like? 29 00:01:54,420 --> 00:01:56,360 My agent's. I don't believe this. 30 00:02:56,170 --> 00:02:58,710 inspirational, celebrational, motivational. 31 00:05:05,550 --> 00:05:06,550 me from dancing. 32 00:05:06,650 --> 00:05:08,310 No, I'll find you a partner. 33 00:05:09,610 --> 00:05:13,910 Herman, I really don't want to hurt your feelings. Don't misunderstand me, but 34 00:05:13,910 --> 00:05:16,550 this is one of the three worst shows I've ever seen. 35 00:05:17,370 --> 00:05:18,530 What were the other two? 36 00:05:18,890 --> 00:05:21,150 There are no other two. I was just being kind. 37 00:05:22,450 --> 00:05:23,450 Here's your partner. 38 00:05:23,730 --> 00:05:27,710 What is it? Well, that's animal. 39 00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:30,530 Well, I knew it wasn't vegetable or mineral. 40 00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:31,230 To be made a fool of by you nitwits. 41 00:08:32,150 --> 00:08:35,250 You have cobwebs in the windmills of your mind. 42 00:08:35,870 --> 00:08:36,870 I just... 43 00:12:17,420 --> 00:12:18,860 This step will bring terrible agony. 44 00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:20,320 The muscles rebel. 45 00:18:19,660 --> 00:18:21,900 Things have happened to other guests before. Other guests? 46 00:18:22,140 --> 00:18:26,520 Other guests what? Julie Andrews? She must have gone on for days and days. 47 00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:35,200 She didn't sing that. She sang when you were a tadpole and I was a fish. 48 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:36,440 Same thing. 49 00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:38,080 Same thing? 50 00:18:38,780 --> 00:18:42,240 I am leaving, and that's it. I'm very sorry. 51 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:45,640 But Carol, you've got to sing. I'll work out something where you can... 52 00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:54,040 make me change my mind. Oh, gee, Carol, I just did want you to do your asparagus 53 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:55,040 sketch. 54 00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:57,160 My what? 55 00:18:57,700 --> 00:19:02,140 Well, I really wanted you to do your famous lonely asparagus sketch. 56 00:19:03,500 --> 00:19:04,920 Oh, Kermit. 57 00:19:05,700 --> 00:19:07,200 Kermit, do you really mean that? 58 00:19:07,460 --> 00:19:10,040 Yes. Oh, Kermit, when? 59 00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:12,520 Oh, well, soon, right now. 60 00:19:13,020 --> 00:19:14,020 I'll change. 61 00:21:49,930 --> 00:21:51,130 if you keep giving them rent. 4592

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