All language subtitles for The Jim Henson Hour s01ex4 Alternate Introductions

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Original subtitles

hi there and welcome to the show we're all really excited about tonight's

program almost all of us are excited

in fact when i asked kermit about it he told me that i should really expect this

show to be out there I don't know what that means, but I assume it's a good

thing. Kermit? Oh, yeah, it's a very good thing, because tonight's show

around the theme of science fiction, and I'm relying very heavily on Digit,

since this whole area is very close to his heart.

Yeah, so when I die, I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

Good evening, and welcome to our show.

Tonight on Muppet Television, Kermit's guest star is the one and only Bobby

McFerrin, a man who proves that anything can be made into music.

Yep, anything. He might even make a musician out of you.

Kermit, what else have you got planned for us? Oh, I'm glad you asked. Let me

show you some highlights.

My goodness.

We've got to get this fixed.

Good evening and welcome to our show.

Hey, did you see all those groupies in the hallway?

Those aren't your groupies, are they?

No,

I guess not. He doesn't have groupies. His albums never sell.

Anyway, I'm sure our own Kermit the Frog has a fast and funny half -hour plan

tonight. Isn't that true, Kermit?

I'm sorry, I can't hear you, Jim.

Could you guys, would you all just be, can you be quiet for just a second? Let

me, Flash, can you...

Hi there, and welcome to our show.

Tonight, Kermit has so much planned, I hardly know where to begin.

Stop the talk and cut to the frog, sign the lion.

That's very good.

You should have been a producer.

Kermit, what's the show about?

Well, there's a lot of fish in it, so I guess it's going to be kind of a friends

and relations show for me.

Great. Give my best to your folks. Will do, Jim.

It's going to be a wonderful show with our great guest star, Ted Danson.

Hey, Lindbergh, have you fixed that hole in the roof yet?

Just about, you stipper.

Oh, good.

Because I want everything chip -shaped for our guest star.

Uh -oh.

Whoa!

Anybody got an umbrella?

Good evening, and

welcome to our show.

Tonight, Kermit has a great show planned for us because his guest star is that

sensational country western singer, Katie Lang.

And I brought this hat for you so you'd look country western.

I know it's too small for you, but they don't have hats in your size.

Anyway, Kermit, what else do you have for us? Well, for one thing, I've got

garbage.

Actually, we prefer the term previously essential material.

Yeah!

Hi there, and welcome to tonight's show.

Hey, didn't you get the message from Kermit? You're supposed to be wearing

jogging shoes.

Don't look at me. I don't know why.

You can ask Kermit.

Kermit, what's happening?

Well, our very special guest star is Smokey Robinson.

Sounds terrific, but why the jogging shoes?

Well, the theme is health in all its aspects.

Like, for instance, sickness.

Digit, good grief, you've got a cold?

Oh, it's a bad one, too.

I just blew my nose, a fuse, and three circuit breakers.

Good evening, and welcome to our show.

Wait a second, you're not the lion.

Very astute of you.

I'm the dog.

But there's always a lion here when I come down the stairs.

Why?

I have no idea, but I've gotten used to him.

Well, he couldn't be here, so he asked me to sit in for him.

Your frog got him a job in front of the public library.

That's strange.

Kermit, is everything okay?

Don't worry, Jim. Except for a small monitor problem, I got everything under

control. Our guest stars are the Nylons, and Fozzie Bear is going to pay a visit

to the Today Show.

That's so cheap.

How did this happen?

Well, I'll show you.

Instant replay.

See, here I am doing my introduction, and then Leon shows up with this woman

she went... Yep,

that'll do it.

Good evening and welcome to our show.

I hope you're hungry because tonight's show is all about food.

Oh, you're always hungry.

Anyway, Kermit, over to you.

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