All language subtitles for One On One s05e05 Study Buddy

Oh, and by the way, nobody even listens
to 90 Degrees no more, not even Jessica.

Baby, are you all right? I have a
philosophy midterm tomorrow, and I know

gonna fail. Well, come on, girl. You're
just stressed.

Let me help you relax.

There you go.

Thanks, baby.

It's just so much harder than I thought
it would be. Oh, sorry.

No, not that. I've got bigger issues.

Whoa. Maybe I can help you with your
studies.

Okay. Right here.

Boy, you read this?

Can't you just rent the movie?

No, I read it twice. And I still don't
understand what any of it has to do with

philosophy. Actually, Atlas Shrugged has
everything to do with Ayn Rand's

philosophy of objectivism, which
integrates ethics, metaphysics,

politics, economics, and my favorite
subject, sex.

Oh, this book's about sex?

Maybe I will read it.

Might come in handy.

Someday.

Ayn realized in order to create heroic
fictional characters, she had to

the philosophic principles which make
such individuals possible.

Oh, I did a lot of reading when I was on
lockdown.

What was a rich boy like you doing in
jail?

Well, it wasn't jail.

I got grounded one summer.

I had to spend three months in a pool
house with a jacuzzi with nothing but

jets.

You know what I don't get about this
Atlas Shrug book?

If Atlas is holding up the world, then
what's he standing on?

Unless it's upside down.

He dares to stand alone against the
hostility of secondhand souls.

So what do you think that means?

I think that means I'm going to fail my
midterm and fail out of school.

Translation, goodbye college and hello
crack pipe.

Look, calm down, all right? It's simpler
than that, all right? It means hero.

And this particular story represents the
ideal man.

Man as he could be and ought to be.

and ought to pop a breath mint.

Ew, DMACC, you dropped something.

Your face.

How come we've been going to school
together for two years and you've never

tried to help me with any of my classes?

Because you never went to any of your
classes.

Just admit it. You'd rather go for the
hot sauce than the fried rice.

That is not true.

I'm sure if you ask for...

No, he wouldn't. Tell her, D -Mac.

Okay. No, I wouldn't.

You two are always snapping at each
other. Yeah, it's a game I like to call

-Mac has no Mac.

D -Mac, why are you always giving Lisa
such a hard time?

I'm just having a little fun with her.

Yeah, well, I can't admit you can't be
kind of fun.

Oh, so you like the D -Mac?

Oh, yeah.

Never mind.

Dude, you would not believe the day I
had at work.

I spent the whole time making special
sauce.

I got news for you. It ain't that
special.

If you don't mind, we trying to use our
minds, all right?

Besides, you smell like fish.

Oh, that.

Let me bring home the day -old stuff.

You want some?

Uh, no thanks, baby. We already ate.

Well, since you guys been working so
hard, why don't you take a break?

Take a walk on the beach.

I brought dessert.

Ah, hot pie.

Thanks, boo.

But I really want to get an A on my
philosophy exam tomorrow. And I should

advantage of DMACC while I got them.

All right. Guess I'll go take this
special sauce and put it on my fish.

See ya.

Oh, hey, Arnett.

What's it called when you have the other
player's king trapped and he can't go

anywhere? Uh, checkmate.

You know what I do every time I play
anyone in this house? Because I'm the

checkmate. Master.

Meister.

Oh, yeah.

Checkmate. Rap.

Meister.

Loser.

What? That's impossible.

I never lose.

You cheated. How did I cheat? You have
perky breasts.

Let's play again.

No, I'm not interested.

Me and my breasts are going to savor the
moment that Cash lost for the first

time.

So what are you guys doing tonight?

Why? Lonely because your girlfriend is
spending all of her time with D -Mac?

Uh, not really. That stuff is boring.
Better him than me.

I want to have fun tonight.

Oh, good. You can come with us down to
the coffee house.

Yeah, they have open mic nights.

We like to go down there and boo and
shout obscenities.

It makes us feel better about ourselves.

Maybe I can perform there tonight.

Well, I feel better about myself
already.

You know, the performance list is
probably booked for tonight, but you

down there tomorrow and tell the owner
that you're my roommate.

He's totally in love with me.

Who the hell is Sarah?

I guess it doesn't really matter. She
said that she would give me some stage

time.

Lots of people want to book gigs here.
You want to move up on the list, you can

start by busting tables.

How much does it pay?

Crap.

But you get your little stage time, and
anything you make in tips is almost all

yours.

Thanks, man. Look, you're not going to
regret this. One day when I'm a big

star... Yeah, whatever. Listen.

You can start by snaking the John, all
right?

But if you find anything of value, we
split it.

All right, Sarah, the board is set up.
You have to give me a chance to win my

title back and make everything right
with the universe.

Your move.

I'm not playing.

It's my title, and I'm keeping it.

I even made a tiara for myself.

It was my title the first five games we
played.

Give me that tiara. No, it's mine for
eternity. Which makes you the loser for

all eternity.

Fine.

But sleep with one eye open.

Blondie, that tiara will be mine.

Phew,

what's with all the cologne?

Huh? I'm not wearing no cologne.

You're right, it's wearing you.

You know, normally I have a comeback for
you, Lisa, but I'm in a hurry. I'm

going on a date. A date? With who?

Not that I care.

With Brianna.

It's a study date, but she got an A on
her midterm thanks to me. Now she wants

me to be her four -time tutor.

In what subject? Hitting that 101?

It happens to be astronomy. What subject
are you studying? Hating?

Hey, come on. You know D -Mac thinks
he's a player, but he knows that

Arnaz's girl.

Okay, you don't think you're a player,
all right? You got to know it, baby.

Oh, boy.

See, with lines like that, you got to
know.

Pitt Arnaz is gone. Nothing to worry
about.

All right, D -Mac, I found the book that
we need. So let's hit it.

That's exactly what I had in mind.

Now, the only way to study astronomy is
to go look at the night sky.

Let me take you down to the beach and
show you the stars.

Nobody wants to look at the stars with
you or swim naked in the ocean.

All right, tell Arnaz I'll be back a
little bit later.

Come on.

Lisa, why are you so concerned with what
DMACC's doing?

I just think it's odd that suddenly he's
spending all of his time with somebody

who just practically moved into the
house.

You know what?

I think you have a crush on DMACC.

That's why you two are always at each
other. I feel it.

What? I didn't... Shut up.

Hey, guys, I got good news.

I got a new job down at the blog.

Where'd we at? I don't want to tell her.

D -Mac's got her down on the beach
showing her the big dipper.

What?

Okay, maybe it's not that big.

What are you talking about?

D -Mac is trying to make a play for your
girl.

Why would you say that?

Because she has a... Ow!

Forget it. She's your girlfriend.

Until she gets intoxicated by his scent.

Why would Brianna be interested in
DMACC? Huh? Because he's in college?

And he's funny?

And he's rich?

And he's... You know what?

I just remembered. I'm late for my palm
reading down the boardwalk.

All right, see those two big stars?

Right there?

All right, go to the right a little bit.

See that bright yellow dot?

That's Venus, also known as the goddess
of love.

D -Mac, what you know about love?

All I know is it's something that can
happen when you find the right person.

I mean, for real, love is unpredictable.

It can happen anywhere.

On the street, at school, or even on the
beach.

flirting with me.

Well, maybe a little.

Don't you like it?

Not worse, Orion.

All right, here, go this way a little
bit. Are you looking for three stars in

the line?

Sit, wait, wait, wait, hold on.

Right there.

Oh, hell no!

Don't do anything that you're going to
regret.

Regret? Look at what he's doing with my
girl.

They were just... I just saw them.

They were pointing at the sky.

Together.

All he's doing is helping her study.

I mean, she just got an A thanks to D
-Map.

She did?

Yeah. And the last thing that you want
to do is be the guy who gets in the way

of her studies.

Isn't that what her dad said that you
were going to do?

Well, he didn't single out school.

But I think it was implied when he said
that I would ruin her life.

Hey, Arnaz, you have nothing to worry
about. All she does is talk about you.

Arnaz, Arnaz, Arnaz, blah, blah, blah.

Yeah. That's my girl.

Come on, let's go. All right.

Oh,

hey, Arnaz. I'm coming down to the blog
tonight.

Oh, cool. Hey, don't get your hopes up,
though. I haven't been there long enough

to get you free scones.

I'm coming down to see you and DMACC.
He's doing a spoken word tonight.

So if DMACC wasn't doing spoken word,
would you still come down to see me? Of

course I would, sweetie.

It's just that DMACC has been so
supportive of me.

This is my way of being homologous.

That means the same way.

DMACC taught me that word.

You know what? It's been really cool
hanging out with him.

He knows so much, and he is so funny.

Oh, what a great roommate.

Anyway, see you later.

So is this... Yes, it's weird.

Then I'm not crazy.

D -Mac is trying to push up on my girl?

Oh, he's trying to push up, down, left,
right, every way he can.

Look, I love D -Mac like a brother, but
they don't call him Mac for nothing.

Look, I don't have anything to worry
about, right? For now. But you need to

handle this before it gets out of hand.

Then I should kick his ass.

No, because then one of you would have
to go. How about I break his finger?

No, a creative way.

With a can opener!

Interesting, but I think you can let him
know that you're Brianna's man without

using kitchen appliances.

All right, Java Heads, our next artist
is a

regular here at the blog.

Let's welcome Da Mac.

No one decares.

Yay, Big Mac!

God, he looks great up there.

I mean, boo!

I got a special piece I want to do
tonight for someone new in my life.

Can I get a spot?

We don't have a spotlight.

And can you dim a light for a brother?

Just do your poem, artsy freaks.

And would it kill you people to buy some
coffee? It's a coffee shop.

To Saturn.

To Neptune.

To Venus above.

I can't keep my mind off my goddess of
love.

Life's a struggle on this planet.

Three pebbles from the flame.

I work hard to keep it real. You know,
stay on top of my game.

I know I'm not the man in your life, and
yeah, that's true.

But one day, who knows?

I could end up with you, my
intergalactic boo.

Lisa, can you go get us some lattes?

I know what's going on here. You're
going to talk about Arnaz and DMACC.

Well, maybe we should talk about how you
have a crush on... Two lattes coming

up!

I mean, you have to know that that poem
was about you. That poem was not about

me.

Well, I may have been the inspiration. I
do have that kind of effect on men.

Girl, you know how it is when you're the
total package.

Yeah, it is a curse. I told you.

No, but seriously, I mean, this is not
cute.

Arnaz is really upset.

Well, upset about what? Is this a little
harmless flirting?

Not if you have a boyfriend.

And if you keep it up, you might not
have one for long.

Look, I want to perform.

Look, I want to be able to reach the top
shelf.

Looks like we're both out of luck.

I need this.

You can dock my pay.

Cool. Ladies and gentlemen, our next
artist is Steve Arnaz.

Steve Arnaz!

Hi,

everybody. I got a little something I've
been working on for someone new in my

life, too.

You always talk about what you got.

The stripes, the cheddar, the women you
clocked.

Can you really be more than what I see?

Because to me, you're just five foot
four and a tight little tee.

Did you little poem? She didn't say
much.

And you're so skinny, I can see your
nipples touch.

So back off, son.

Please give it a rest.

Unless you think you're hard enough to
put me to the test.

up for steve and now we have a newcomer
to the blog baby wait

you didn't need to do that no i think i
did sweetie it's not like i haven't had

plenty of guys play with me before you
should see all the guys at school at the

gym at the grocery store uh not helping
getting mad again look what i'm trying

to say is i have to admit i like the
attention but but i didn't mean anything

it

You have nothing to worry about, and you
never will.

Because I'm in love with you, Arnaz.

Or Steve, or whoever you are.

You know what?

I kind of like you being a little
gangster for our love.

Girl, you know how I roll.

Yeah, baby, let's not blow the fantasy.

Can you just rush back here just so you
can wear my tiara?

It's not a tiara when a man wears it.
It's a crown.

And a forfeit's as good as a loss.

Loser.

No, you're the loser. Now give me back
my tiara, you cross -dresser.

Not until you win it back.

I got a chessboard set up in the living
room.

All right.

Now, you know what? Forget chess.

Let's play a game that takes a little
brain power.

A staring contest.

Starting now.

Hey, Arnez.

Can I talk to you for a second?

Sure. Brianna, DMACC and I need to have
a little man talk.

Okay. All right, baby. I'll see you
inside.

Come on, Lisa.

Girl, I said come on. We need to have a
man talk.

Look, I heard you up there today, man.

You know, I'm in no disrespect.

But still, you got to understand, you
know, when it comes to women, it's this

charm and charisma I just can't control.

Oh, I think I could control it.

And not just because we sleep, what,
three feet from each other, but because

thought we were boys.

No, we are boys, man.

And I... I'm sorry.

All right?

You know, it was just easy to get
carried away with Brianna because she's

so cool.

But she's your girl.

And I get that.

All right, good.

As long as we understand each other.

Baby, it says here it's a good time of
night to see Venus.

And I'm pretty sure they mean the
planet, not the tennis player.

We can go out to the beach and try to
find it.

Look at you, taking an interest in my
schoolwork.

Come on, let's go. All right.

And if we don't see Venus, we can always
see Serena.

Honey, there's no planet Serena.

And you're the one going to college.

You know, DMACC, I'd really love to see
the stars.

Oh, for real?

Yeah.

Well, here you go. Enjoy yourselves.

I hate you, too.

Oh, my God.

He does love me.

One, one, one.

Love you, Daddy. Love you, too, Netta.