Original subtitles

And since WYNX implemented its minority hiring program in 1995, we've seen a

steady rise in our audience and sales.

And an increase in our marketplace value.

Not to mention the value of those luscious legs.

Ooh, girl, they're so fine, they make me jealous of your pantyhose.

Flex, now we have two days to prepare for the Eastern Broadcasters Conference.

Now, if we nail this, it will open the door for extra funding.

So keep your eyes off the prize.

Dwayne, has my pillow wronged you in some way?

No, I was just fluffing it for you, dog.

Fluff, fluff, fluff.

Diana, what was that?

Y 'all excuse me while I check on Brianna and my supply of almond massage

You're not allergic to nuts, are you, girl?

That's it.

Either you're going to have to ugly yourself up or I'm going to gouge his

out. You have to tell him about us. But, Dwayne, flirting is part of our

professional relationship.

He flirts, I resist.

Don't worry.

My heart belongs to you.

Oh.

Let me give you a pop of some sugar.

Oh, well, well.

Come out for a butter knife and get a little taste of the spice channel.

Rihanna, you promised not to tell your father.

Oh, don't worry. My lips will remain sealed.

Oh, and by the way, there's a little Bow Wow concert next month, and Front Row

Center will be divine.

You evil little girl.

Oh, I get my license next year. You ain't seen nothing yet, car man.

Sometimes in this life, you can feel all by yourself.

But I have a partner, but I can't show no one else.

So don't isolate yourself when there's nobody around.

I'm up at the broadcast conference.

Come on, Daddy. I'm 15.

If we were in Kathmandu, I would have a husband and five kids by now.

Brianna, the rules, quickly.

Home by 8, doors bolted, windows locked, no boys, parties, or any type of social

gathering. And what's the most important rule?

No getting pregnant.

Dad will be as saintly as heathens come the apocalypse.

I told you going to Sunday school would pay off.

You know what the thing about heathens is? They always lie.

my little mahi -mahi.

Oh, you're so crazy, baby.

That's so sweet of you.

Well, remember how a couple months ago we talked about flying to Hawaii, and

then you reminded me of that violent reaction you had to sunlight?

What's that called again?

Chronic polymorphic light dermatosis.

That's it.

At first, I thought you were lying.

But then I remembered, we've never been out together in the daylight.

So, we're going native right here under the safe, soothing rays of my

fluorescent lights.

That's great.

Is that it?

What is it with that man? He's like the sex terminator.

Did you hook up with the Samoan girl with the prosthetic leg?

Yeah, she's in the bathroom right now making sure her knees light up.

All right, cool. I just came to get my suitcase borrowed, and I will get out of

your little Polynesian pickup joint.

All right.

So is everything set to knock their socks off at the conference?

I'm all set to knock off something, man. Ever since me and Stacy have been

working together on this thing, I'm telling you, dog, we've been clicking

your mama's false teeth.

about this flex. I mean, office romances are always bad news. You know what they

say, never fish off the company pier.

Dwayne, we are two professionals who respect each other's intelligence and

nakedness.

No, I'm counting the minutes before you get back to your grandma, Natasha.

No, I miss you more.

Yes, I do.

Yes, I do. Yes, I do.

Are you as disgusted as I am? Yes, I am. Yes, I am. Yes, I am.

All right, now let's go over this one more time.

All right, there's a knock at the door.

Homeless man with an axe standing there naked. What do you do?

Give him a sandwich and a blanket.

That's right, because the only thing he's trying to kill is his hunger pain.

Now, there's a guy with a bat and a shank at the fire escape.

Start running, but if he catches up, trip spirit.

That's my girl.

And he needs to get out of here because I don't trust him.

Mwah, mwah, mwah.

I take that back. He's no longer a threat.

Love you, Washington.

Love you. Bye.

Okay, you got the guest list, I got the refreshments, and now all we need is

music. Girl, your love is the gasoline that ignites the pitions of my soul.

Get off the phone!

Yes, ma 'am.

The haters.

Your boopy -woopy loves you too, Spooky Woogie.

Girl, it's like he's possessed. How long is this little crush on Natasha gonna

last? Girl, you know our nads fall quickly. He fell for you at first sight.

Well, that's me. I got that kind of power.

So what, you can't come to the party?

Your little brother has a recital.

Oh, well, I don't have to go to the party. I'm sure she can find another DJ.

What?

Girl, watch me use my power.

talk to you about being the dj at my party uh brianna i'm not finished yet

out spooky woogie now you're finished what's her problem

power failure

oh

flex we kicked butt yeah and when you told those station managers to step foot

into the 21st century i was at the mountaintop

them to take those steps with some brown feet besides them you had them speaking

in tongues look the point is you really came through for the station flex we are

bound to get that funding now oh that would be the bubbly

wow

champagne and chocolate covered strawberries looks like you're bringing

big gun oh uh You'll know when I bring out the big gun.

In ten minutes, we're gonna have a stream of hotties up in here.

And everybody's gonna want an audience with the girl who made the cocktail

weenies. Go ahead.

Okay, uh, somebody's here early, weenie girl.

Ooh, no, never mind. Just a jumbo shrimp.

Uh, Dwayne, what are you doing here? Uh, your dad asked me to stop by and check

in on you and your adolescent shenanigans.

But we're not doing...

Oh, I see some sodas.

Oh, I see some napkins. I see some pumpkin seeds.

Either you're planning a party or an AA meeting.

Duane, please don't ruin this for me. I'm not going to ruin anything for you.

I'm just going to sit here, kick off my shoes, sit back, and talk in the

festivities.

You know, Duane, only a trusting man can leave my daddy alone with Stacy in a

romantic hotel for a whole long time.

Long, moonlit night.

A long, sultry, beckoning night.

I know what you're doing's not going to work.

Nothing would make me ignore my godfatherly duties.

I trust Stacy.

Okay.

Why, y 'all hear something?

No, in fact, my daddy's been so busy, he hasn't even checked in with me yet.

And the only time my daddy doesn't check in with me is when he's, ooh.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

Stop it.

Nothing's going to happen.

Stacy promised me nothing would.

I don't know. I saw him packing two bottles of his good cologne.

The Burberry. Not the Burberry.

Oh, you didn't? Dutch told me to come. You know Dutch, right?

The guy that knocked me out last week.

Lost the tooth. Wanna see?

Weenie? Oh, you know weenies are an amalgamation of pork products with a

rat hair?

Ooh, Arnis, I am so glad you're here.

Oh, so are we.

for him all evening.

Oh. Come on.

Reggie knows what she wants.

Come on.

She's amazing.

What's wrong? We're having fun. The mood is right.

I like you. We both like me.

Okay, Flex, look. I'm seeing somebody, all right?

Technically, I'm seeing somebody.

And right now, I'm seeing him tied up and being tickled with a feather.

I'm serious, Flex. And he happens to be a very sweet and loving man.

Okay. We've had Christmas parties, office picnics, and an annual bull

And I haven't met this guy.

Why are you hiring him?

Is he wanted by the law?

Is he a victim of a chemical accident?

Or is he just a loser?

He's an international businessman.

Oh, really? Business, huh? Well, Kyle, quickly.

Import, export, textiles, commodities, pork bellies, onshore drilling, offshore

drilling, horse?

So he doesn't have a great job like you or I do. So he makes 10 cents more than

minimum wage.

In the Philippines.

I understand.

He's a super loser!

Okay, Rihanna, I just finished making sure everybody has punch. Now I'm going

keep our nails company.

Wait, wait, wait, girl.

Can you do me another favor?

Can you take all the red dots out of the...

They can be a little disturbing, girl, you know.

Can't you get somebody else to do that? I haven't spent any time with Arnaz.

Oh, but, but, girl, no one's as good as you.

So, get the pittin'. Thank you, Natasha.

Thank you, girl. Girl, you're working hard like an overseer, come on.

I have to. As long as she has Arnaz wrapped around her little finger, he is

no use to me, and I will not be ignored, okay?

but you have feelings for him?

Okay, um, are you eating those weenies or smoking them?

I don't have any feelings for Arnax.

All right, thanks, man. Keep this.

All right, no hint of Burberry.

Dwayne Odell Knox, what are you doing?

She said you're special and she would never cheat on you.

Washington, you the man.

I'm just trying to help out a damsel in distress.

Well, if you were just trying to help, why did you take me back down to the bar

so we could have the second bottle of champagne?

Because you know it makes me randy.

I was hoping that it would make you naked.

Flex, you dirty, dirty boy. Let me expect it.

really hard on the floor oh she's a hot thing i should kill them both no no

who said that it can't be comfortable let me get you in the bed yeah just take

me to bed too bad for you i'm a nice guy

okay oh where are we going

my purse okay hello tell him to put you down

right now oh my god he's in my head who is that is that your super

loser take your hands off my woman dwayne yeah your

super loser

Stacy and I have been seeing each other ever since that big storm last

Christmas. Remember when we helped out at the station?

We're in love.

Go on, tell them, Cornbread.

Tell them about our little Hawaiian adventure.

You can't, can you?

My mama was right.

You are a shame to me.

I can just duck into the bevel.

Wow.

Rihanna's bedroom.

This is cool.

Never been a lot in here before.

Yes. Alone.

By ourselves.

The two of us.

Hey!

She kept that piece of origami I gave her.

She called it origagmi.

must have taken off. You know, this was all your fault. I never thought that a

woman would come between me and Dwayne.

Don't blame me, Flex.

You're the one that called him a super loser.

You take that back, all right?

My friend Dwayne is not a super loser.

You don't know anything about him. I know a lot about him. I know that...

Nothing.

Because if you did, you never would have been ashamed of him.

And you know why?

Because he knows how to be a real friend.

When I was away at college and Nicole was pregnant, he checked on her every

single day.

And when I was in the NBA on the road, he would put on stilts and stand around

Brianna's crib just so she could see a tall person and think Daddy was home.

Put it simply, I love that man.

And you don't deserve it.

Man, I heard every word.

Hey, that Burberry is kind of nice.

Man, I never would have gone after your girl if I'd have known it was your girl.

I know, man. And I never would have called you loser if I'd known you were

loser in question.

But why did you guys keep this a secret?

Fleck, if I had told you that I was in love with Dwayne, what would you have

done?

But then I would have told you, you couldn't have picked a better guy than

best friend, my dog.

Thanks, man.

That Burberry is nice.

If you two will excuse me, I think I saw two flight attendants at the bar, and

they look like they might want to fly air flights.

Dwayne, I'm sorry.

And if you take me back, you'll never regret it.

Well, I don't know, Cornbread. I mean, you hurt me.

You hurt me deep.

Oh, man, Dwayne, I'm all messed up.

I've been chasing a good career instead of a good man.

I only hope I haven't lost a good one in you.

I love you, cookie toes.

And I'm ready to tell the world.

That's not good enough.

Sugar nose?

Okay.

What are they doing in there? What, what, what?

The only way to find out is to open the door and go in.

That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of. Now move out the way so I can

open the door and go in.

What was that?

Brianna, there's something wrong with the window in your dad's room. And I

somebody might have just lost it.

A big toe.

What are people doing in my daddy's room?

Come on.

I'm sorry, Natasha.

Don't you mean Brianna?

Hey, where's Brianna? I have to tell her I'm leaving.

She's in the bedroom with Louis.

Louis?

Natasha!

Natasha, wait!

Spirit. Spirit.

What happened? My bedroom door is open. Where's Natasha and Arneis?

Oh, they did what they had to do and they did what?

Hey, Daddy.

Hey, Bree. You up early?

Yeah, I couldn't sleep.

The place looks nice.

Vacuumed, you mopped, you dusted.

Is that pine I smell?

Yeah, well, I know you like a clean house.

Oh.

You're punished.

Why?

No teenager uses pine salt unless they're trying to hide something.

You can tell all that from pine salt?

That Ann Duane told me.

Love you too, Netta.