All language subtitles for One On One s01e08 Phantom Menace

Hey. Oh, hey, Daddy. How was the game?

Ooh, you should have seen your old man
out there. I was shaking and baking,

giving and going, showing him both.

OK,

well, to me, it looks like he was
crashing and burning.

Come on, hit me with the rock.

Oh, all right.

Ow! Oh, baby, you all right? I don't
know. How does it look?

Oh, no, I knocked out your tooth.

Where is it?

Gotcha.

That's not even funny. I was getting my
story ready for your school council

about how you fell.

Come on, Daddy. It's Halloween. I'm just
having a little fun. You've been having

Halloween fun with me all week. Now stop
busting my chops and go bust some suds.

All right, all right. No more prank.

Oh, dang it. The fork in the garden's
disposal.

But I can't tell no one else.

So don't isolate yourself when there's
nobody else.

Perfect specimen right under your nose.

Check it out. We're hitting the stair
faster.

Oh, yeah.

I cannot believe he would move into my
building.

Relax, man. We're not even sure that
it's him. What's going on, Daddy?

Puddin'. This is all about Elliot
Templeton.

Elliot Templeton? The basketball star?

Gather around, children. Let me tell you
a story.

Now, see, Elliot and Fletch are longtime
rivals.

Drafted in the NBA the same year.

Elliot goes on to become a multi
-millionaire and the pitch man for Count

Chalkula.

Now, Flex blows out his knee in the
second season and ends up living the

his life as just, well, your daddy.
That's it.

Look, Dwayne, he is always trying to
steal my life. He's like a hoochie in

VIP section getting buzzed off my
champagne.

Next time I see him, I'm gonna rip his
eyes out, I'm gonna pull his legs off,

and I'm gonna kick him in the butt with
his own foot!

Elliot Templeton. He ain't paying no
bills for me. He ain't doing nothing for

me.

Elliot, my dog.

Wait,

I thought you said they hated each
other.

Men don't hate. It's good to see you.
How long has it been?

Too long, man. When I heard that you
lived in this building, I figured if

good enough for Flex Washington, it's
almost good enough for me.

Hey, you know, I heard... San Antonio
traded you to the Wizards.

Apparently the Spurs wanted to win.
That's just what I heard.

Did you see Jordan today?

Oh, yeah, yeah, in practice.

You know I'm the only one that can stick
him. You know.

Did he sweat on you? Can you lay a
little of that on me?

I see the little guy is still on the
short yellow bus.

But look here.

If you guys...

Want to meet the man?

Why don't you come to my Halloween party
tomorrow night?

Oh!

Jay, I have got to go to that party. Oh,
no, no, no, no. I am sure there are no

kids allowed.

Oh, they can come. Okay, my kid's not
allowed.

Look, sweetie, how many times do I have
to tell you? I don't party with my

daughter. That only happens with people
who live in trailer parks or carnival

folk.

because you're going straight to
boarding school in the out.

Somebody better tell Billie Jean to beat
it because the king of pop.

See, it's moonwalking juice.

Okay, well, please put some cones out,
because somebody's going to slip and

fall.

So, Michael, baby, who's throwing this
party?

Oh, just some guy. I hate that. It's
just why I'm taking you there, to show

off. I guess I better go push everything
up.

Man, this party's the talk of the town.

I'll push stuff in. This afro is
starting to itch.

Trick or treat.

Oh, look, it's Cisco and the Black
Blossom.

It's still not too late to invite us to
the party and be a cool dad.

Oh, yes, it is. Peace out, losers.

Bill Gates, Bill Clinton, and Bill
Bellamy.

This party is off to easy.

Yeah, but is Bill Cosby here, huh? Well,
I guess it's not for cheesy.

I gotta go back to the punch bowl. I
think I dropped my Afro pig in there.

Elliot.

He's bad.

Or is he bad?

So where'd you get your costume?

Celebrity costumes, off the internet,
straight from Hollywood.

Where'd you get yours from?

From Michael.

Here, baby. Thank you, baby.

Elliot, I'd like you to meet the soul
sister who brings me love and love.

Tonya!

Elliot!

You two know each other?

We, uh, sort of dated.

You are looking good, girl.

I haven't seen you since that weekend in
Madrid.

Olé, Flex.

Olé, Flex, huh?

You could have told me. You told me the
guy throwing the party was some guy you

hated. You never said it was Elliot. You
would have told me if you knew?

No.

Listen, don't walk away from me when I'm
talking to you.

Okay, I wonder what that was all about.

She probably told him she dated Elliot,
too.

Hey, man.

That's my jacket.

what you're doing uh did jillian watch
an mtv oh really um what's all that

a French maid.

Why are you just trying to scare us?

Thank you,

Elliot.

Flex, man, that Elliot sure knows how to
throw a party. Look at this.

Salmon mousse, mouette, and chandon.

Pastry stuff with things I can't even
pronounce.

Spinach.

Elliot so much, maybe you should be his
best friend.

Nah, I can never get a guy like that.

Look, Dwayne, this guy's always trying
to feel a piece of my life. Everything

I've ever had, he's always won.

Every game I won, it was my thing to
throw my jersey into the crowd.

What does he do? He throws his sneakers
into the crowd. I tried that, and the

old lady had to get 62 stitches to close
up her lip.

Damn, Lex, I've never seen you this
jealous. I'm not jealous, okay? I'm too

for that.

Don't you think that's a little bit
intimate?

You know what? I don't like you like
this. I think I'm going to go over there

and talk to that mime. I'm sure he's got
a better conversation.

Hey, man, don't you think you're a
little rough on Tanya? Oh, you mean

Tanya? Beneath that itchy, unkempt afro
lies the heart of a beautiful young

woman who just needs a little love.

You're right, man. I need to relax.

Yeah, come on, man. Just breathe.

Thanks, man, for being my good friend,
dog. Oh, come on, now. You can always

count on me.

You know, I'd never leave your side.

Hey, Dwayne, a friend of mine wants to
buy a used station wagon for his

housekeeper. Gotta go.

You've done well for yourself, Flex.

Great girlfriend, great career.

I hate to say it, but I want to be just
like you when I hang up my sneaks.

Well, you know, it's a long, hard road.

Before I got this gig, I had to pay my
dues.

I had to do the dirty work.

Well, you know, I'm retiring after this
season.

Your old knee is going out. You know how
that is.

But I got a little scoop for you.

I'm all ears, bro.

I just spoke to my agent.

He set up an interview for me to be the
next lead sports anchor at WYNX.

My WYNX.

Brianna, please, look, I don't have any
time for your pranks. Go home.

No, but, Daddy, I'm telling the true
spirit. I saw Brianna get very scared.

Uh -huh, which made us very scared.

Go now.

But, Dad, it's not a prank. You've got
to believe me. He's a killer.

The only thing he's killing is the
electric slide.

I'm going to kiss you kids.

This ain't about you.

Oh.

Okay, he's headed to our side of the
building.

And my God, unless he's going to do
laundry, we're in trouble. We're going

die.

I should have been the one with the NBA
career.

I should have been the one rubbing
elbows with the rich and famous.

I should be the one kicking it with
Count Chocula.

This is about me and how I never
realized my dreams.

reminds me of what I could have been.

What you could have been.

Look at what you are.

Fleck, I know you and I know Elliot.

He's stuck up, he's materialistic, he's
insecure, and quite frankly, he's

boring.

He's got nothing on the flat -out man.

I guess I pretty much made a fool of
myself, huh?

part of your charm and i thank you eat
that up and i won't stop till you get

enough

Oh, yeah, then where'd you come up here
for, huh?

Let's see who's behind this mask.

Ooh!

A murderer with bad skin for you is
professional.

That looks like he needs some backup.

So I'm backing up. Elliot, help me out.

Stuart!

Flex, why are you manhandling my
accountant?

Because your accountant murdered a
little old peep and a French maid.

The French maid is my wife.

She had a little too much to drink, so I
put her in a cab and sent her home.

Oh, yeah?

Well, where's little Bo Peep, huh?
Where's little Bo Peep?

Where's little Bo Peep?

Stuart, you weren't fooling around with
Delilah again, were you?

My wife was gone, the bedroom was open.
Do the math.

Sorry,

man.

Sorry it's a little rough on you.

But that's just how I handle my
business.

Let's do it. Let's talk.

Hey, everybody's welcome to come back to
the party.

Elton John is going to do a duet with
whoever's willing.

I know all the words that don't go
breaking my heart.

Dance on the Kiki D part.

Guess I'll be seeing you around, Fleck.

Hey, you know, I want to apologize for
my behavior.

I was tripping, you know.

Yeah, you were.

But you've always been emotional.

Well, that's what made me the ball
player with a lot of heart, you know.

that's in the past.

Let's just bury the hatchet, dog.

But, uh, I am glad that you moved into
my building. And I'm also glad that

you're not trying to steal my life, you
know?

Oh, sweet, naive flex.

I am trying to steal your job.

And your life.

not like others.

Love you too, Netta.