Original subtitles

Bye, Daddy, see you later. Have fun at work.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

That's what you were in the school?

Yeah, after you freaked out about my outfit yesterday, I figured I'd dress

appropriately. You're a good daddy.

Wait, no. Aha!

Trying to pull one up on the master.

See, I thought we agreed. Less a little cam, more everything else.

Well, everybody doesn't have a daddy who's willing to catch a case over his

daughter.

Not to mention, your knees look like you've been praying in a flower.

Check it out.

Check it out.

What do you think?

I don't think you can get any shorter.

What is it?

My latest advertising tool.

See, the Ferrari brings in the men, and yours truly brings in the ladies.

Speaking for the ladies who aren't blind, it's not working.

Well, why don't you speak for little girls and be quiet?

Now, you're not selling Ferraris down at that lot. The fastest thing on that lot

is Big Sal's secretary, Easy Linda.

True, true, but you see, people have to come down to the lot.

In order to find that out.

Don't you ever feel sleazy cheating people?

Man, I'm a used car salesman, all right? I eat sleaze for breakfast and wash it

down with a big tall glass of dishonesty.

That's my cousin Rio.

Trust me, there's nothing there. Just all good looks and athletic ability.

I think he's on the Dean's list, too.

He's also quarterback of the football team. They call themselves the Dog

Or you could call me the Dog Catcher.

Woof, woof.

I know what you're thinking. But I can say this because he's family.

He used to keep a booger collection.

What's up, cuz?

What's up, geek?

Whoa, who are your friends?

Well, you already know Spirit, and this is Brianna.

Brianna? Nice name.

It means virtue, but don't let the name fool you.

Rio? Oh.

I've been looking all over for you. It's fourth period, that's our time, and you

know how I feel about our time.

No, I'm sorry, baby. Let me make it up to you.

Okay.

Who's that?

Tiffany Dyson, Rio's girlfriend.

He's that desperate that he's dating a cheerleader?

Doesn't like dating a life -size Barbie doll except the doll's hair is real.

Um, Spirit, Arnaz, why is your little friend staring at me?

Tiffany, meet Brianna.

That means virtuous.

Well, I'm Tiffany, and that means I don't care.

Oh, so you're a cheerleader.

Head cheerleader.

Let me guess, you're a wannabe.

Oh, no, I'm a gonna -be.

Because you just convinced me to try for the team. Oh, how cute.

The little freshie wants to be a cheerleader.

Tiffany, once you see my moves, I think you're going to want me on your team.

Cheerleader rule number one.

Don't think, just cheer.

Trials are at 3 o 'clock tomorrow.

Bring it.

Oh, honey, it's already brought.

or those cardboard cutouts bringing in the business?

Uh, three were defaced, seven were stolen, and one... Let's just say there

Satan worshippers in your neighborhood.

But that's all right, because I've come up with a whole new campaign, friend.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Last time I heard that from you, I lost $2 ,000 and

engaged to a midget wrestler in Mexico.

All right, come on, man, look, look. This has nothing to do with that, all

right? I just told Big Sal that Baltimore's hottest sportscaster, the

Man... was going to be our spokesman.

He was so excited, he offered me a woman from the old country. You volunteered

me to be the pitchman for Big Sal's used cars?

The old country, Flex.

She makes wine with her toes.

Look, man, I don't care if she cracks walnuts with her butt cheeks. I'm not

doing that. Come on, man.

All I got to do is get Apollonia to get you some pasta and some gabagoo.

I don't even know what that is. I just like saying it.

Gabagoo.

Say it with me.

Gabagoo.

I'm not saying it, I'm not doing it, and I'm not the guy that's doing it.

Hey, how's my high schooler?

Go on, tell him how you sold out. You became a Buffy, a Heather, like... Oh,

God, these new chairs are so rad.

It's no big deal. I just signed up to try out for the cheerleading squad.

But you hate cheerleaders. Yeah, she's doing it to close you up to Rio.

He's trouble -flexing. He has a mustache.

I know I've always... thought of cheerleaders as a bunch of mindless

high -rise skirts, but I couldn't help myself.

That Tiffany pulled me in. Now I've got to get her. I thought this was about

Rio. Who's this Tiffany girl?

Obviously one of the hoochies.

Flex, if you're gonna be a good father, please keep up with the children.

Tiffany is Rio's girlfriend, the newest speed bump in Brianna's love life.

Hey, man.

So you're doing this to steal some cheerleaders' boyfriend?

Didn't I teach you better than that?

I'm not doing it because of that. I'm doing it out of spite. That daddy's

yeah.

It's Lex.

Brianna. Anybody home?

Good. Uh -huh.

Too good to be in my commercial, huh? Well, we'll see about that, Mr.

Flagg.

Little hidden camera.

Lex Washington for Big Sal's used cars.

Three cameras. Take one.

What's up, Glenn?

What's up,

man? You know, we never get a chance to talk like we used to. Sit down.

What you doing, man? Just making sure that my buddy's comfortable.

Lex, you remember your first car, don't you?

Of course I do. A 78 Midnight Blue Pacer with chrome wheels.

I nicknamed the Thriller.

After the Michael Jackson album.

No, after an ex -girlfriend named Thriller Thomas.

Hey, look, Spirit, there are two spots to open on the cheerleading squad. We

could try all together.

I'm a trained dancer. Why should I have to wait ten years of ballet and jazz tap

to be a cheerleader? How is that going to get me to Broadway?

I don't know, but it'll get you out of fifth period of science.

Well, go team go!

Okay, great. All right, Daddy, check this out, all right?

We're going to do victory.

Aren't ass be ready to catch me? Girl, I'd catch you like a cold.

Come on.

Okay? Ready? Okay.

Victory, victory, here I strive. Say it, know it, watch us fly.

Wait.

Baby, you okay?

I'm cool.

That was in the routine.

Oh, okay.

See, that was cool, but, you know, your cheer was lacking some attitude, you

know, and some hips, you know? You gotta cheer like you're mad.

What do you know about your leader?

I know a lot of things about his leader.

Let me show you a little something, you know what I'm saying? A little flashback

right here, you know?

F -L -E -S.

Who's the best from east to west? Flag.

Flag.

Who's the man with all the know -how? That would be me, because make the lady

say I.

or doesn't need any work.

Tiffany, carry on.

Next.

So, Brianna, what are you going to show us today besides your padded bra?

Girl, I told you this wasn't going to work.

See, what had happened was we going to do our own cheers.

They made up their own cheers. How cute.

Here at McKinley, it's more than just cheering for football and basketball.

We like to compete on more of a national level, and your cheers are a little

more on the neighborhood level.

So what are you saying?

How can I put this in a way you'll understand?

Oh, heck, I'll just say it. Your cheers are way too ghetto.

Soon you'll be buying a quality used car for Brianna.

As a parent and as a consumer, what will you be looking for?

Value, safety, or reliability?

Right now I'm looking for a big spacious trunk that I can throw you in.

What are you doing?

Brianna, Brianna, she's our girl. She's the best cheerleader in the world.

makes a squad.

Oh, Brianna, Brianna didn't make the team. Guess it's not easy as it seems.

Wait, please.

Bri, what happened?

Tiffany said my cheers are too ghetto.

Who she be calling ghetto?

Didn't you say her mother plays the lotto with food stamps?

You know what? She probably just jealous because her boyfriend be checking me

out like I could turn all this off.

Sometimes I have to ugly myself up just to be accepted.

Dad, I thought high school was going to be fun.

It's only been a few weeks and I already have an enemy.

Sweetie, along the road of life, you're going to run into potholes like Tiffany.

You just got to buckle up and drive right over them.

No. Dad, maybe I should just quit this whole cheerleading thing.

You know, sweetie, when I first became a sportscaster, it wasn't easy.

I was missing cues, messing up people's names.

Well, did you ever think about giving up?

Yeah, but then I remembered how much your child support payments were.

I had to get back in the game. Your mama was tripping.

Dad, what's your point?

That I never knew what I could do until I tried.

Bree, you can't quit.

Nobody likes a quitter.

Okay, girls, that's a hurt.

Solid as a rock.

session. What do you guys want? A second chance. I really think we have

something to offer.

Wow. You've already learned cheerleading role number two.

Never give up.

How many rules are there?

They were good, kid. Come on. Maybe you can give them a second chance.

Brianna, you and your friend are spunky.

be the head and the other can be the ass.

Wait a minute.

Rihanna, there is no way I'm going to be the possum boogie.

Man,

that was some game.

Dwayne, you watched the game from the sideline.

Yeah, we're running back and forth getting you water to warm me out.

That's why Sal is my pal.

Did you just say, Sal's my pal?

Yes, I did, and that's all I needed.

So, sweetie, did my little pothole pep talk turn things around for you?

Oh, it sure did turn things around. Now we're spunky the funky possum.

It's in my experience that the mascot often steals the show.

You got the Baltimore Oreo, the San Diego Chicken, the Rhode Island Roach.

I mean, he's nasty, but he's a great entertainer.

How are we supposed to entertain if we're dead?

Possums never stay dead, baby.

why I don't mean nothing, because I'm still running things up in him.

Oh, it sounds like Tiffany is taking a trip to ghetto land.

Bye, y 'all. See you at practice tomorrow.

Yo, y 'all were banging. Yeah, my girl sure was.

Arnaz, Brianna only likes you as a friend. No, she loves me. Didn't you see

way she was looking at me?

Oh, please. She's just using him to make me jealous.

Poor Rio.

Being used like that.

I was rooting for you.

Well, I'm glad you like the show.

But I'm sure your girl didn't like you liking me.

Rio!

I'm coming, babe. I'm just showing your new cheerleader here the ropes, you

know. That's all.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to seeing a lot more of you, Miss Virtuous.

Hey, what's up there, buddy?

I'm Brianna's father, Mr. Washington, and you must be Brother Need to Comb His

Hair.

Daddy, you can't keep running off boys. Yeah, well, that boy can't keep running

from a comb.

Are you ever going to like a guy a date?

Sure I am. When you find one whose parents are named Mary and Joseph.

Oh! Oh!

Oh, you see that head?

I never knew the human... body could bend that way.

That's what happens when the cheerleader gets in the way of the play.

It's your cheer in the stand.

Big Sal, Big Sal.

Uh, yo, Flex, man, give me the controller. No, no, hold on, hold on.

This is a commercial, right?

Big Sal's used car lot, where Baltimore's elite come to shop.

Isn't that right, Flex Washington, celebrity sportscaster for WYNX?

Sal's my pal.

And what did you drive off of Sal's lot, Mr. Washington?

A 78 bit back new pace with firm wheels.

So if you're looking for a lady you can love on four wheels, come on down to Big

Sal's used car lot and drive away a dream.

Right, Flex?

Flat out.

Wait, I'm going to kill you, man.

Yeah, but we both know you won't. See, that's the magic of our friendship.

Love you too, Netta.