Original subtitles

Welcome to a fucking podcast episode two.

I'm your host, Sean O' with me today, Mike Mancini.

I'm Jasmine Loser.

Am I saying that right?

Am I pronouncing that correctly?

You know what my name is, sir.

It's love.

Yeah.

Because I'm full of it.

Did you spell it incorrectly because you have issues with spelling?

I was trying to be cool and different.

And it actually just fucked me over in the long run because now everybody spells my name

wrong.

Right.

So, go.

But you originally, you didn't know you were spelling it wrong.

I knew what I was doing, Sean.

Did you also spell it with a little heart?

On top of it or not?

No.

So, Mike Mancini, have you ever knocked anybody out with a baseball bat?

Actually, I knocked somebody out this morning with a baseball bat.

All right.

Tell us about it.

And I'm glad it wasn't Jasmine.

No, it definitely was not her.

Surprisingly.

Yeah.

You know, just at my local convenience store and the homeless guy happened to have a little

small hatchet on him.

And he was attacking an employee and I was in my car and I was like, all right, I'm

guessing I'm going to do this now.

And next thing you know, I grabbed my baseball bat and he's kind of knocked down on the floor.

So those little league skills are coming in handy?

Oh, yes.

They full circle.

So, how do you, did you just go up and just slam it into him?

Were you going for a home run or a single?

What kind of paper you were going for?

I was lining up for like at least a double or something like that.

I didn't want to like kill him or anything.

I just wanted to do him a little bit.

So he fell but he's not unconscious?

I mean, he might have been unconscious to begin with but he did fall over.

So yes.

Brain damage but not death.

And so this wasn't the first time you've done this?

No, this is something I have to do quite often in my neighborhood unfortunately.

How many times have you hit somebody with a baseball bat?

This is the first time I had to use a baseball bat but probably the fifth time I actually

had to stop somebody.

The fifth time you've used a baseball bat?

I love the crack heads of money.

The fifth time I stopped somebody.

So you love the crack heads?

Yeah.

Because they hook you up with free crack I'm assuming.

Yeah, that's why I'm always cracked out all the time for sure.

Just cracked up.

But no, I feel like Vegas crack heads are happier.

Is that a trick you look for in guys or?

In crack heads you look for happiness in crack heads.

So I'm going to say it's like no, but like they like me.

I don't know.

I've never had issues with mine.

It's probably because I'm pretty.

But like whenever they ask me for money I'm like oh I don't have cash but I'll get you

water.

And so like all of my local crack heads like I'm the bitch with the pink hair.

Pretty girl with the pink hair.

Are you the water dealer?

Yeah, I'm like is that the boys with the waters.

Yeah.

Or like lighters and shit.

I'm like I don't have cash but like I'll get you something to drink.

And they're like oh my god I just love you.

I love you too.

I feel like every time I offer that they always say no to me out here.

So.

Yeah they don't trust your water.

They trust your water.

But I guess that's true.

There are different types of crack heads.

There are like the crack heads who are like dancing and singing and it just like the

impossible.

That's the crack heads up.

Like one time there's a lady like with her titties out on the corner and I was like

saying girl because it was like 111 degrees outside.

She actually wanted a job.

She looked a little bit intimidating and large and big and tall.

What type of crack head do you think that you would be?

Or even like method.

Because I don't really know the difference.

Can you tell the difference between the crack heads?

It would be more of like a heroin girl.

I'm already like crack head energy.

And then the heroin would just subdue you.

Yeah and then I'd be dead.

So.

I don't want to be a crack head.

I'm not a crack head.

I actually am not homeless.

I'm just friends with crack heads.

I'm yeah I don't discriminate.

I live by the strip.

They're everywhere.

So you're the one sane person in the group.

Barely.

So there's two different types of ways dealing with you know crazy homeless people.

One person gives them water.

The other person.

Almost baseball bats.

Baseball bats.

Yeah.

Wow.

I'm actually the nice one for once.

Wow.

Who knew?

Have you ever threatened anybody with a baseball bat or to stab somebody?

When I was 17 years old I got arrested with my two best friends for aggravated armed robbery,

aggravated assault and aiding in a bedding and conspiracy to commit.

But I got away with it.

Should I have like a Kevlar best on?

Wow.

Or like some protection or something?

Wow.

Alright so could you tell us the story of what happened here?

Um we knew this guy.

It wasn't my idea.

I'm not this person anymore.

I was just the person with the car.

You were the getaway driver.

Yeah.

You weren't a good getaway driver because you were too slow because you guys got caught.

No you got to wait with it.

No we got to wait with it.

I just had a shattered window.

So he called the police because we were trying to steal ass.

Okay.

I don't know if I should tell.

You don't have to tell this story.

It's just.

We're trying to steal.

Okay he really wanted Adderall.

I lied to him.

I said I had Adderall and I did not have any Adderall.

My friend really wanted like this sheet of acid so I'm like okay cool.

I have Adderall.

Give me your acid and then they like went outside of my car and then he took the Adderall but

then the dude like hit like punched him or something and then my friend stole his vape

so they called the police about the vape and then his whole thing.

Wait that's what they called the police about.

A vape.

A vape.

Out of everything that was happening.

They were like police.

These people stole my vape and the police didn't just laugh at him.

Nope they arrested us all.

Why do people have such trouble getting the police to show up but they show up for a stolen

vape.

This isn't Minnesota.

Okay they have nothing else to do.

Stole and vape that's like number one priority.

Yeah I feel like every time I try to call the cops they never show up for me out here.

You might not even have an arrest record if you lived in Vegas if you grew up in Vegas.

I was 17.

No I have a record in Vegas.

I just quashed my warrant on Monday actually.

What happened in Vegas?

I was wrongfully arrested for a DUI.

I love that it's always wrong.

I'm noticing the train with all of these things.

Is there anything that you've got in trouble for that you did?

No.

So you're just completely.

I'm sure also all of your exes were crazy and never you right?

Yeah right.

That's how it works.

Yeah.

You're offering the killed themselves.

So.

Whoa.

So this is a common thing.

So what do you guys date you?

They want to kill themselves afterwards.

What do you, Kim K over here?

Yeah.

I love her.

I'm making cuts crazy.

Is it, is it because they're so in love with you or that you just ruined their lives?

I think they love me but I'm also like a fucking brat at like sassy bitch.

So like I have a very horrible attitude sometimes and not everybody can like tolerate it.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I love that attitude.

I know nothing.

I just exist.

So if let's say I or Mike Mancini were to date you, what is the likelihood that you

would slash her tires after the relationship was over?

I would not.

So that's so much work.

I would just fuck up your windows.

Or we have a lot easier.

That's easier.

Obviously.

It'd be a future in a lifetime in a couple years if you started dating her.

Yeah.

Is your goal to be on snapped about how you like poison the guy over several years?

You don't have the pants.

The pants that like his mom literally said like she will kill you if you guys stay together.

And I would have.

I hated them.

I'm noticing a trend with you.

Three cherry pits.

Your relationships.

It's good enough to kill a grown man.

Three cherry pits.

Yeah.

There's enough cyanide in there.

That's how I would kill a person.

So I'm allowed to say that.

Eating cherry?

I did not know.

Three cherry pits.

Yeah.

How would you kill a guy?

I'm not saying.

Didn't you have this conversation?

Just donate cherries.

Around her.

Jasmine Love apparently.

Or anything.

Or tea.

Don't drink tea unless you make it yourself.

It's like I'm watching that Jeffrey Dahmer show and I'm just realizing.

Yeah.

Party.

You probably, you would have a similar look to them right now.

Yeah.

Never.

Never take drinks for me.

Especially.

If you're dating Jasmine Love and you have a very tumultuous relationship where she just

hates you, but then one day she's really nice to you and she gives you champagne,

you're dying that day.

That's the lesson that we're learning.

I'm surprised that you're underwear are not pink.

You didn't match.

You did not call a court of me.

Jesus.

Jesus Christ.

How did you get up with that?

Can we not use Jesus' name in vain in this type of household?

You're right.

You're right.

This is godly environment.

I am a cousin of God.

It's cousin of God.

Why are we doing porn?

Yeah.

God has forced me to be here.

God gave me boobs in a vagina for a reason.

God has made us horny.

I need to put that on TV.

I didn't realize we were going to church today, but I'm glad we went there.

How many drug dealers have you dated in your life?

Wanna be drug dealers, you mean?

They weren't even good enough to do that.

Yeah.

Doesn't that reflect more on you?

Why were you dating the wannabe drug dealers?

Why weren't you just dating the real drug dealers?

Do I look like I have good taste in them?

Yeah.

Fair, fair point.

Terrible, terrible taste.

You know, it's strange when you guys make out like this.

I feel like you're disrespecting me or disrespecting the show.

I'm trying to conduct a podcast here.

Can I really hear someone?

Sorry.

So, Jasmine, you've done a lot of psychedelics over the years.

Massive amounts of psychedelics.

You've been in crimes that have involved psychedelics.

How do you know that this isn't just an acid trip right now?

I don't.

Yeah.

Do you live most of your life?

I don't.

Just in this world where you think everything is...

I don't take things seriously, ever.

It's probably smart.

Because why?

What do you... is this what's getting you going?

Is this what's getting you wet?

Is your foot...

Oh my God.

She made me spill my teeth.

I can make it.

Did you just...

I just jizzed off.

I was like, oh.

Just such arousal from those feet.

It's come.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Oh, again.

There's more where that came from.

He's just pumping it out all day.

Trust me.

This has happened before.

They're not special.

So is this the angle that we most see you in?

Is this like your go to?

On my back.

Yeah.

When you go stripping, you probably don't even dance.

You just get on your back and throw your legs up.

Yeah.

You're like, give me money.

I do the floor stuff and I just get really close and I just stare at them.

Until they give you money.

Has anybody ever tried to put a quarter inside of you?

Knock no, Sean.

And then like, spank your ass and see what happens.

You're not in a strip club before?

Oh, I'm really popular in the strip club.

Everybody knows me.

Yeah, because your picture is up in the back.

Don't let them score your style.

At all course.

Okay, so you started out as stripper.

You took guys in the back.

What are some of the strange requests you've had from guys?

You had a guy who paid you extra to smell your armpits.

He just paid me double for a dance just so I could leave my clothes on and he could

smell my armpits.

So he literally paid you to put your clothes back on.

What does that not surprise me?

He's like, I don't really want to see this.

This isn't doing good for me.

But maybe put some clothes on and I can imagine what's under there is a lot better.

Yep.

So what else has happened?

Have you ever given a hand job?

No, but I figured a girl once.

There's a champagne really, champagne really.

Yeah, no sex in the champagne.

No sex but I did figure a girl in there one time.

Mike, have you ever had sex in a strip club?

Not in a strip club but in a regular club, yes.

Really?

Where?

The coke closet.

The coke closet.

That's going to be a New York thing.

I was the promoter of the club.

So I kind of, you know, I had three range of the club if need be so.

So I've met a few promoters in Vegas.

Aren't they all just drug dealers?

Vegas promoters probably.

I was not a Vegas promoter.

Vegas promoters give me, it's giving grimy.

How many Vegas promoters do you know?

None.

I know of promoter out in LA but he's like fucking awesome and he's not a creep at all.

He's great.

Shout out to Dan.

Yeah, shout out to Dan.

This podcast sponsored by Dan.

When you need to get into a club, the only Dan's going to get you there.

Try Dan, Dan.com.

And home.

He hovers me home.

He hovers you home.

Again.

You see, guys are paying her to put clothes on, guys are paying her to leave.

I'm starting to notice, what are some other things guys have paid you to do that people

wouldn't think?

They can pay me to be quiet.

That's exactly what I was thinking.

But today I pay you to be quiet.

No, but they can.

I don't know.

I don't think it would work.

I don't think we could pay you to not talk.

Nor would I want to.

I enjoy talking to you.

That's a lie.

You light up my life.

When do you think it was that you first realized that we were going to have sex?

We've never had sex.

I know but we're going to eventually probably, right?

Maybe.

Yeah.

Maybe.

Yep.

So when do you think that moment was?

When was the charm?

You were looking through some of my social media.

It was the TikTok for me.

You're looking at me.

Yeah, the TikToks do it for you.

Yep.

That humor.

Mm-hmm.

I invited you on my podcast.

See, she thinks I have...

It's a podcast.

She thinks I have pool to get her booked for things.

I don't.

But I pretend that I do.

Everybody knows.

So the pink hair, was that so that you could get attention because obviously people aren't

giving you attention for your looks.

It's just kind of a way of like look at me.

Because nobody's noticing you just for the physicality.

I'm taking that as a yes.

The science.

Is your go to just to shake your ass when you don't know what to say?

I'm not going to say.

You just bounce it?

That's how she gets to distract people.

I'm really like, she's not answering anything.

So Jasmine, you started in the industry in February 2020.

What?

You started in the industry right before COVID happened.

Has timing always been your thing?

No.

I don't have time.

I don't know how many times of time it is.

At what point do you think you did too much acid where it just fried the brain?

I didn't fry my brain.

I had an ego death and that was six tabs of acid.

Six tabs?

That's what all your kids...

What were you depressed about?

I don't remember.

Do you feel like blow jobs are better when the person giving it is also trying to have

a conversation?

No.

Like the mumbling, does that do anything for you?

You get the sonic kind of...

It's like a vibration.

It's nice.

It's kind of having a vibrator on my skin.

I'm going to form.

Oh yeah, it's nice.

I got some hot air blowing out on it too.

It's always good.

It's interesting that even when she has a dick in her mouth she just keeps talking.

Which is what we love about her.

We love to see it here on a fucking podcast.

And actually one is why she's single sometimes.

I feel like this makes her more dateable.

I like to have conversations while I'm getting my dick sucked.

How often do you have conversations while you're getting your dick sucked?

You know, actually now that I'm in porn quite often.

Yeah, that's true.

Not only from the first time I'm sucking my dick sucked by but also with crew members

too.

So between scenes, when you're edging you're keeping it hard before fucking...

Is it helpful to have a conversation with somebody?

Because it takes your mind off of things or is it distracting?

I don't know if that really gets me going on a full on conversation about sports with

another male crew member.

Just looking straight into their eyes while you're just...

I'm going to turn them off football and get in.

Have you noticed there are certain male crew members who like to talk to you more?

Oh yeah, 100%.

Do they do it to fuck with you or do they do it?

I feel like it's a mixture of both.

They're so...

I'm trying to think of it.

So, so null to it that they don't even realize that they're doing it.

Right.

Yeah.

Or maybe it keeps them from looking at your dick.

Also that is another thing I've noticed when I'm naked on set.

People's eyes can't help but look at your dick.

Yeah, it's kind of...

Even though they've seen it so many times it's just like a natural...

I had the same thing to affect, you know, anytime you're in a locker room you just

clap and then go like, it's just a natural fit.

Right.

You're like, there's a dick.

You just wanna...

What's going on with that dick?

We didn't see many dicks growing up so our eyes are drawn to the dicks.

That's nice.

I like when you look at me while sucking his dick.

There's a lot of thought in that.

I feel like you're trying to show off.

You're trying to be like, this is what I would do to your penis.

Think what you are.

I will.

So, Jasmine, you've listed your hobbies on one interview as smoking weed and napping.

Would you describe yourself as an ambitious person?

Yeah.

I guess that isn't that delicious.

Right.

Likes to snap, likes to smoke a lot of weed.

I do whatever I want, or I do whatever makes me happy.

And if that's smoking weed and taking a fucking nap, then I'm gonna do it.

What do you like to fall asleep to when you're taking a nap?

Do you put shows on?

I feel like you're a cartoon person.

It's not fun.

Jersey Shore.

Jersey Shore.

What is it about Jersey Shore that you like to sleep to?

I love Snooki.

What is it about Snooki that you love?

I see myself in here.

What exactly do you see yourself?

This scene where she's right next to the beach running and she's like, where's the beach?

Where's the beach?

And then when some do it is just like, it's right there.

He's like, okay, thank you, love you, bye.

And then she got arrested.

And then she got arrested.

I feel like that's a title.

She got arrested in Italy too.

That's the title of your memoir.

And then she got arrested.

Whatever she does, and then she got arrested.

Jasmine, on average, how many boner pills do you think most male performers have to take

to get hard for you?

Depends if they actually like girls or not, probably.

Mike, you have any comments on that?

No comment.

So, Jasmine, tell us a little bit about, you're currently trying to get pregnant with a few

sea list sound cloud rappers, I believe, right?

Yeah, sure.

How many?

Yeah, how many?

I don't want to date anything.

You don't want to date them, you just want to have their baby.

How do we know when somebody, like, what is the threshold of if they're famous enough

or rich enough for you to want to baby trap them?

Like do they have to have the blue?

Like a gay crime level.

Like they have to be a president of a country.

Of somewhere.

Right.

So a mayor is not going to cut it.

Like we want president of a country.

And then you can baby trap them.

Are you currently on birth control?

Yes.

That's what you tell them, right?

Yeah.

You can come inside me.

Don't worry, I won't give pregnant.

What are some, can you give other girls who are also hoping to baby trap, you know, famous

men, some strategies?

Like, how do you go about it?

How do you, how do you lure them in?

How do you get them to trust you?

I don't care about them and it makes them want me more.

One of my exes is technically, I don't know.

And he was obsessed with me, but like, I didn't like him that much.

I'm noticing a theme with everybody you date.

You just don't like them.

Yeah.

Have you ever thought about maybe trying like dating somebody that you do like?

I thought I liked them and then.

How long into the relationship do you realize you don't like them?

Not too little.

Awesome.

It's like, fuck, it's not even three months.

So out of the air can do it.

Was that the one who DM'd me to leave you alone?

Oh no, that was the other one.

You had this.

Okay, tell us about this.

So you had somebody you dated DM Mike to leave you alone.

And why specifically did he target Mike or did he just send us to the...

He said he like, so did my story or something.

And I sent a heart eyes thing.

You know, I was like, oh, she's hot.

Oh, so this is when you were together and he was going through your phone or something.

Yeah, he loved going through my phone and I was asleep.

Loved it.

He was like, not a chance buddy, give up.

Look at us now.

Yeah, right.

Shout out to you, man.

Yeah, fuck you.

What was his name?

Can we say his first name?

Fuck you, Shun.

Just fuck you, Shun.

Shout out to fuck you, Shun, and all that you did.

It was Creshawn.

Oh, Creshawn, Creshawn.

Yeah.

Eat my dick, Shun.

Eat my dick, Creshawn.

I have to.

And you corrected me today too.

Yeah, she requested me.

Wow.

So apparently the heart eyes emoji do work on you.

It does.

Yeah.

All the guys are just going to flood her DMs with heart eyes emojis.

Mike, did you know, did you think that I was just her DMing me you back?

Oh, I know.

So I know when I got...

You knew immediately.

Yeah, I knew.

What's her boyfriend?

I thought I was like, all right, whatever.

See, Jasmine, but that seems like your move is going through your boyfriend's phone.

I do, but I don't do anything about it.

I'm basing me.

Oh, one time I went through my ex's phone, the one that deals with Mike, and I found

stuff and so I found Bratton bananas in the house and I went in there and I just fucking

chucked it at him right in the space.

He threw it around.

Oh, mushy and gross.

And I poured water all over his money.

They didn't use his sounds exciting, thrilling.

Really?

I can't wait.

Mike, serious question.

Yes.

Why do you think crazy girls have better sex?

That is a good question.

I feel like it's the eyes that they get you dirty, huh?

They hypnotize you to think it is better.

It's like there's something about emotional instability.

Oh, yeah.

Maybe they're just willing to go to like a deeper, darker place.

I am.

I also feel like it's a thrill of like knowing that they actually might stab you.

Yeah, yeah, the tabooness.

She's going to kill me.

I might die and there's something hot about that.

So Mike, have you, we've been talking a lot about Jasmine baby trapping people.

Have you ever tried to get someone pregnant?

No, never.

No.

No.

Boy, it all costs.

What level of fame or wealth would a woman have to be for you to try to get her pregnant?

Are someone who's a celebrity that I could blackmail probably?

Sam!

Would you blackmail her or would you just want to get money from?

Yeah, I would be the, actually the most problematic baby I've ever been.

Just give me some fucking money.

You can fuck whatever you want.

I'll be the baby, momma, I'll have to picture.

Again, giving you money to go away.

I mean, given the fact that I am a guy who's important, so like, you know, I can blackmail

with my, let everyone know that I'm your baby daddy.

Yeah.

You know?

Interesting.

Right.

So you would get money just to be quiet about it.

Yeah.

That would be your strategy.

Mm-hmm.

Interesting.

So anyway, you did not be the baby, momma, from hell.

Mm-hmm.

So when you guys were interviewing to get a job in porn?

I didn't get interviewed.

I got handed to me on a silver platter.

So somebody slid into your DMs basically and said, hey, do you want to be important?

You said yes.

Pretty much, yes.

And then I was just in another trend with you, is that the way to get your attention

is just to slide into your DMs.

Maybe send you a little heart emojis.

Did your agent send you heart emojis?

No, my agent was actually very, very normal.

He just yelled me on Instagram and then he found my Snapchat and he had DM'd me on Snapchat

too.

And I'm like, who's this Ryan guy?

I'm like, sorry bro, not interested.

Like, yeah, I'm like, I'm not paying shit.

And he's like, what are you talking about?

Like, you don't have to pay anything.

Blah, blah, blah.

He got me on the phone.

And then he got me to agree to meet him at a Starbucks.

Starbucks, huh?

Yeah, I was like, shout out to Starbucks.

Where Starbucks at Miracle Mile, yeah.

Yeah, all porn conversations happen.

All contracts, all for it.

A lot of business deals happen at Starbucks.

So Miracle Mile, you got into porn.

And then you ended up here on the couch with me and Mike Manstein.

Yeah.

Nice.

Having a three-way.

Yeah.

I'm going to tell people we had it three days.

This is why I'm even sure I'm second three-way.

Yeah.

We've been together a few times.

Yeah.

That's nice.

I kind of like this relationship because I don't have to risk getting her pregnant

because I feel like she would try to baby trap me.

Maybe.

Jasmine, speaking of things that have been inside your vagina, what do you think is the most

questionable thing that you put in your vagina?

Maybe a toothbrush.

Did you use bristle ink?

My ex-stick.

Which end of the toothbrush?

People need to know.

Not the prickly part, the normal, like the smooth part.

Was it a vibrating one?

Yeah, it's actually, I did it for porn on new bios.

So there's pictures of it somewhere.

And it wasn't, do you think new bios, the director was kind of like, kind of a subtle

way of saying like, hey, you kind of have a dirty vagina, we really want to like clean

it out, maybe put this toothbrush in there.

Yeah, they made me put toothpaste on it too.

Right.

Yeah.

Did they also suggest maybe power washing it out?

I actually just did that with your bidet.

Yeah, just blast it.

It's on full throttle.

I noticed.

We have a lot of smelly holes here, so it's higher.

We can blast them for better, really.

Mike, same question.

Yeah.

What's the most questionable thing you've put your dick inside of?

And it could be, you know, anything from a fruit to a jasmine.

I'm going to have to say jasmine.

Yeah.

What?

This is...

I actually have never been asked anything weird.

I think you put in two, so.

What about a person?

The most questionable person?

Most questionable person, once they were in here, but she was like four feet, five.

Ooh.

Good braces.

Ooh.

Yeah, so that was...

That's tough.

That was.

That's what you literally looked like.

You know, a little kid.

Right, I'm not into that look.

Neither.

Jasmine, because you kind of look young, not like super young.

You're tall, but you also...

You look bold.

You look like a brat stall.

I feel like it's fair to say.

Do you get a lot of fans that want you to pretend to be young?

I have all the sissy fans.

Like...

Just because you're good at talking shit.

Yeah, I'm like fetish fairs and stuff.

Which one of your fans do you think is me on your OF?

Because I subscribed.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I've already had a few questions.

I've not married them while.

I've noticed this.

Kind of why I got here.

What are you all thoughts on Sex with Aliens?

I would do it.

I would do it probably.

1000%.

That sounds fucking hot.

I just sort of would be slimy.

You don't even know what they have, but you'd let them fuck you.

Or like a demon?

Do you think that's your only shot at happiness?

Maybe banging into Alien, because maybe you could have...

I want to bang like a demon.

Like if Michael Myers came in my shit and just started dicking me down, I would not hate him.

Why do you think so many women are into serial killers and getting murdered?

It's not serial killers.

Or like you always think he wouldn't kill me.

I'd be the special one that he didn't kill.

I don't know.

Delusion?

I don't know.

Because maybe flip her over.

Get her a doggy.

Doggy?

Turn around.

See the kids?

That way it's...

Oh.

I feel like we're in a real relationship now.

Oh, a Tinder moment.

I'm going to show this video to our kids.

When they ask, what's wrong with mommy?

Your mom's always been crazy, kids.

Let me tell you a story.

How we first fell in love.

Mom's doing that thing again.

What thing?

Okay, if you had kids, our kids specifically.

How do you think you would traumatize them?

Because they're going to need therapy later on.

What do you think they would talk to their therapist about what you did to them?

I feel like I'm crazy.

I feel like I don't know.

She loves me too much.

I can see that.

You'd be obsessed.

But you'd also probably threaten them with a knife at some point.

Yeah.

No, not a knife.

Maybe a spoon.

My mom hit me with a spoon.

I would be the one to chuck a fucking shoe at my kids head for sure.

I'd get your clap though.

Yeah.

My mom would smack me with my face.

Yeah, if I had my attitude, she'd pop me right in the mouth.

Maybe I'd do that.

And it didn't fix anything.

No.

Me and my mom wrestle a lot.

The concrete stairs.

I love my mom.

We're best friends.

I wrestle with my mom too, but not in an angry way.

She was a wrestler.

She went to my wrestling practice.

That's cute.

Yeah.

And she hit me with a spoon.

Because you lost probably.

Oh, obviously it's my mom.

She's tough.

She's become.

So, speaking of therapy, what are some things you talk to your therapist about?

I have had like seven therapists.

Do they get me?

Do they end the relationship with you or do you end it with them?

I think one or two ended it with me.

And then the other one.

Actually, what were their reasons for ending it with you?

One thought I was like a lost cause.

She's like, this is a bitch.

You're like, what?

Do you have a problem separating your emotions from me or rational?

You know what I mean?

Like, let's say jealousy for instance.

Like, you know you shouldn't be jealous, but you are jealous.

I have a major problem regulating my emotions.

What do you think that is?

I have BPD.

Oh, okay.

What is BPD?

Forte line personality disorder.

Fun.

Yeah.

We have fun with it.

We're having fun with it.

Yeah.

Fun with mental illness.

Meantini, what are some things you talk to your therapist about?

Well, today's conversation, making it to it.

I'm one of those guys who bottles everything in and doesn't leave a baby.

Good, right.

You just, you have a baseball bat in your car.

Yeah.

Let's wait for those moments.

To let my younger out on a T-Buddy side, you know.

I don't got a therapy anymore.

Right, obviously.

I don't know if you can.

No, this is Marva.

Mom made me go.

I see.

Yeah.

You don't need it.

I don't.

I feel like I'm good enough.

Right, you're as good as most people I know.

Yeah.

You're not trying to kill anybody.

Yeah.

Actively.

Actively.

You're not under investigation for any murders currently, right?

No.

I have dreams that I kill people and I'm like, why the fuck did I just kill this person?

Now I have to run from the police.

Yeah, I have those dreams too.

Yeah.

And then I'll go to my friend's house and I'm like, dude, I just killed this person.

Wait, hold on.

I'm like, can you smoke this blunt right now?

I'm like, dude, I just killed this person.

Yeah.

All right, if people were to bet on how you would die, what do you think the surest bet would

be?

I would probably get murdered or maybe like, it'd be an accidental thing.

An accidental murder?

I mean, I wouldn't do it.

I don't know.

I'd kill myself.

I mean, like a car crash or like something fucking wild, like a natural disaster.

You got something like, oh shit.

What about you, man, city?

Uh, the way I would go out?

Not the way you would choose to.

The probability, like the percentage, the highest likelihood that you would die.

Probably heart attack.

Okay.

Something safe.

Yeah.

If I hit 80 and stuff.

I mean, I already got it to a quiet scene when I broke my neck, so pass that one.

You got into an accident where you did what?

Can I hit by a garbage truck and broke my neck?

Jesus.

And you didn't die.

No, you didn't die.

You're like that unbreakable guy and you're here fucking Jasmine Love.

Or, again, this could all just be in CrossFit.

We're all dead.

We're all in hell.

This isn't hell.

This is more like purgatory.

Are you saying this is hell?

Could be.

We're having fun.

Yeah.

Um, you know, you don't have to, I know this is fun.

We're having a good conversation, but sadly we can't keep the podcast going forever.

So you can come any time you want to.

She will never come because she has no feelings on the inside.

Um, we're the host.

We're the host.

We're the host that you like to get pop-pop.

What part of her be winding?

Just flow my little.

I never got to choose the pop before.

Don't give him this much power.

I mean, maybe.

Can he come in your cup?

No.

No, I don't want him to.

He could.

I have no doubt that that's something that you're capable of.

Are you going to drink it for us then?

Yeah, if he comes in it, are you going to drink it?

Yeah.

That's tough.

Do it.

All right.

Hold on.

Let me drink it down so you don't have a lot.

But my cat look.

Oh.

I know, my cat look.

And then now, every time people watch this show from now on, they're going to know that you came in here.

Yeah.

That's the whole beauty of it, I guess.

We're getting to know on that one.

We're getting down.

My producers don't want to.

It's definitely not me.

So I just said you could come in her face.

Don't step on her.

I know she's beautiful.

I know.

I miss her every day.

Seeing you reminds me of her and how much I miss her.

I don't want her in your mouth.

Mm.

Wow.

Oh my God.

That's a really nice one.

Just another day on a fucking podcast.

We've talked about a lot today.

Talked about dreams, ambition, making mistakes when you're younger.

And I think that's really the lesson that I learned from today.

Is that you can be a juvenile delinquent who goes on probation for skipping too much school

and then gets arrested for kidnapping and burglary and pretending that you have

Adderall to sell and not actually have an Adderall to sell.

And you can go through all those experiences.

You can get kicked out by several therapists.

And yet you can grow up to be a just well-rounded, beautiful individual like Jasmine Love.

The future baby mama to be one of the greatest future wives you can ask for and really hope for.

And I can't wait to introduce her to my parents.

Hi mom and dad.

Hi.

Jasmine, we're in love with connection.

Sorry, two hours.

Fuck you, a future girl.

Oh no, it's going to happen anyway.

That's us dating.

Is it going to stop?

We like watch the kids.

We're going to fuck.

Fuck right now.

Well, guys we did it.

Yes.

Another great episode of the fucking podcast.

We'll see you next time where we won't have these two losers on but two other people I would say.

This loser will be here though.

And I'll be here as always.

Goodbye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Yay.

You're a resource.

Yup.

Sorry.

Bye.

Bye.