Original subtitles

Ha ha ha ha!

Oh, man, Dexter,

I just can't believe it.

You, of all people.

Here, let me read it again.

Ok. Now let's see--

ahem.

"It has come to our attention that your son Dexter's performance

"is not in compliance with the standards we have set forth

"here at Huber elementary.

"Therefore in order to alleviate this potential problem

we feel a parent-principal conference is necessary at this time."

Wow, Dexter. What'd you do?

Dee Dee, it is not so much what I did--

it is what we are not going to do.

What?

[Sighs]

Whatever you do, don't you tell mom!

But why?

Is that my two beautiful, perfect children

who can do no wrong?

That's why.

Hiya, mom!

Hello, my Princess.

And there he is--

my little genius.

And did you have a good day at school?

Oh, how silly of me-- of course you did.

Every day is a good day for my little genius,

'cause you are the most perfect, wonderful,

fantastic, and brilliant boy who ever lived.

Yes, you are, ha ha!

Aw, shucks, mom-- rub it in, why don't you?

[Bawling]

And modest, too.

Aah! What am I gonna do?

I know--tell me what you did!

What'd you do, what'd you do, what'd you do?

Dee Dee, will you quit bugging me?

I'm trying to figure out a sneaky way

of having this parent- principal conference

without mom finding out!

Fine. I won't bug you anymore.

But, Dexter, if I was your mother,

I would be very hurt to know that

my own son couldn't be honest with me.

[Sniff]

That's it!

Oh, Dee Dee-- [Kiss]

Thank you, thank you! [Kiss kiss]

So you're gonna tell mom?

Heck, no!

You're gonna be my mother!

Whatcha talking about, Dexter?

I'm talking about...

The molecular makeover machine!

This baby can change the outer appearance

of one organism-- oh, let's say, you--

to the exact likeness of another--

such as mom.

Well, I won't do it.

Ok. I guess you'll never find out

what I did, then.

[Beeping]

[Beeps]

It's morphing time!

[Whirring]

Ooh...

Ahh...

Ooh...

Aaah!

[Dee Dee's voice] Ooh...

Oooohhh!

Dexter: Dee Dee, cut it out!

We're gonna be late!

Come on.

Is that any way to speak to your mother?

Dexter! I want you to wash your homework, feed the trash,

take out your dinner, clean Dee Dee's room,

mow the carpet, vacuum the grass,

and water the cat.

[Growl]

Give us a kiss. [Growl]

Eww, gross!

I don't wanna kiss you!

So, what's new?

[Clock ticking]

Ooh, busted! Ooh!

Dexter: Dee Dee!

Don't blow this. Act like a mom.

Oh, I love you so much!

Yes, I do!

Let me pinch those widdle cheekie-weekies!

Cut it out!

Woman: Dexter...

The principal will see you now.

Dexter's in trouble! Dexter's in trouble!

Oh, Dexter is-- yes, Dexter is--

I said, Dexter is in trouble!

Oh, Dexter is-- yes, Dexter is--

I said, Dexter is in trouble!

Don't ask.

Uh, first off,

I'd like to thank you both for coming.

No problem, princy!

Yes. Well, I suppose you're wondering why you're here.

You bet! What did he do?

What did he do?

Well, I was just getting to that--

so I-If you'd like to take your seat--

[sighs] Ok.

[Whispers] Stop it.

Stop what?

That. You mean this?

Yes, that.

Why?

Because. Because why?

Because I said so.

Well, who are you?

Your brother, that's who!

Um, I-I mean,

sorry, mom.

That's ok, dorkster.

I know you're dumb.

So where were-- aah!

Candy!

Oh, yes. Please... Help yourself.

[Gobbling]

So... As I was saying,

we here at Huber elementary

take great pride in our brightest students,

like Dexter here--

which brings me to why I called you both here.

It's seems that... Well, Dexter's grades are slipping.

Now, ma'am, I know this may be hard for you to swallow,

but...

But... [Sniff]

But--Dexter got an "a-minus" on his last test.

[Sobs]

I'm sorry!

That's it?

An "a-minus?"That's what you did wrong?

Uh...

You give me a full body makeover

all for a lousy "a-minus?"

Jeez, I thought you stole the school mascot

or destroyed the science lab!

Hey!

Or at least t.P.'D his office!

Hey!

But, no! You got a stupid "a-minus."

Dork.

Oh, my.

Well,mom,

I wouldn't have gotten an "a-minus"

if my stupid sister would stop bugging me!

Dee Dee is not stupid!

She's prettier, taller, nicer,

friendlier, happier,

and way more popular than you'll ever be!

Plus your father and I like her best, so--

whaaaa!

Oh!

Eeeeyaaaah!

Hooooooaahhh!

Uh-oh.

Wait...uh...

Uh...stop? Please?

Please!

Stop!

That's enough!

Obviously this Dee Dee is the root of a lot of aggression

between you two...

Which is why I'd like the 3 of you to talk to the school counselor--

let's say, same time tomorrow?

Thank you all for coming.

Really, thank you.

Now, Dee Dee, tell me,

how are you?

How does Dee Dee feel?

[Dexter voice] Duh, Dee Dee--duh-- feels dumb...

Yeah, uh-huh, uh-huh.

Dee Dee dumb! Dee Dee dumb!

Stop it, Dexter! I am not dumb--

I mean, you're not dumb--

well, yes, you-- Dexter is dumb...

[Shouting]

Yes, well, I see.

Dexter, how do you

[dog panting]

[Woof]

I see no problem here. Do you?

Nope. Want to go get some lunch?

Surely.

[Shouting]