Original subtitles

Today we're going to discuss the Civil War.

Miss Bliss, you said we were going to see a movie.

You're right. I did promise you a movie.

However, when the film arrived, it was in less than satisfactory condition.

Gee, that's too bad, Miss Bliss.

Now we can't study the Civil War.

And if we can't study it, why even be here?

Park it, Zack.

You know I always have a plan B.

Now, the Civil War was different.

Not only was this country torn in half, states and even families were divided.

Father against son, brother against brother, and in some cases, even mother

against daughter.

Big deal. Sounds like an ordinary weekend at my house.

I'll show you on this map exactly how the states split.

And somewhere is the North.

Riding on my chair, she won't know that I'm there. If I can hand it in tomorrow,

it'll be all right.

It's all right, cause I'm saved by the bell.

It's true what they say about history. It really is a mirror to the future, and

like clockwork, always repeats itself.

Every year we ask Mr. Belding for more supplies.

And every year, he gives us the same answer.

No, no, no, definitely no. The budget's been gutted. Now, you just have to make

do. But my art students need acrylic paint.

Miss Palladino, did Rembrandt use acrylic paint? Did Van Gogh?

Renoir? No.

They may do with what they had, and so can you. But I have nothing.

Well, work with it.

Please, Mr. Belding, just read my list.

A globe, set of encyclopedias, VCR, a field trip.

A field trip?

Yeah. I want to take my students to the statehouse to see our government in

action. I want to make American history come alive.

Leave it alone.

History's much better when it's left in the past.

Care for a requisition form?

I've been filling out forms for years. Nothing ever comes from me. Now, as I

recall, you received a very nice slide projector three years ago.

I did, and I appreciate it.

There's a slide of you and Mrs. Belding at Club Med jammed in it.

My students were very impressed. You could limbo.

No, I'm sorry. My hands are tied.

I leave you with one word.

Requisition form.

That's your word.

Miss Bliss, your mail.

Trump Hill Academy? They got two of our teachers last year.

Well, they are not going to get Miss Bliss.

Good morning.

Do any of you future scientists of America know what day tomorrow is?

Tuesday.

Tomorrow is dissection day.

All right. I've been waiting for this day all my life. Yeah, it's... Party

We're going to slice those frogs to shreds.

Class, meet your specimens.

Please. You better not. Oh, my gosh. They're alive.

Only temporarily, my dear.

Sus, lighten up, Mickey.

They're only frogs.

If it makes you feel better, we'll give them a last meal.

Screech, let me have your flies.

No way. You're not getting my flies.

Now.

Third thing tomorrow, we'll expose the heart, the lungs, and the kidneys.

Once we expose them, we'll remove them and have some real hands -on experience.

Any questions?

Um, does everybody have to do this assignment?

Why on earth would anyone not want to participate?

A word to the wise.

White. is not a good color to wear tomorrow.

So, Morton, have you filled out your requisition forms for the year yet? Yes,

have. It's like pulling teeth with the front office.

I rather enjoy it.

I don't. My students are always getting shortchanged.

Oh, Miss Bliss.

Mr. Belving, is that you?

Surprise. I give you the world.

What's the catch?

There's no catch.

A previous requisition of yours was filled, I told you. Trust in the system.

Mr. Belding, have you had any luck acquiring my lightning rods?

Sorry, Morton, the school board turned you down again.

They don't believe reanimation of dead tissue should be an eighth -grade

activity.

Fools.

Miss Cliff, I want you to know that I am in your corner. Your fight is my fight,

and your need is my need.

He was sincere.

He was generous.

He was up to something.

Lisa, we need your opinion on the best way to approach a woman. And since

almost one of them, you'll do.

Thanks.

I think the first thing you tell them is that you have a lot of money.

That's a good start. No, no, no.

You open your heart and you tell them with sincerity the biggest lie you can

think of. That'll work.

If it's the right lie.

You want my opinion?

No.

Sign this.

Sign what?

Down with Frogicide?

What is this?

It's my petition to stop the senseless killing of frogs in Science Park.

Senseless? Oh, I suppose it's okay to raise defenseless little frogs for

slaughter. Well, why else would you raise them? To give people warts?

You don't think frogs have feelings?

What about...

You toad. You're talking puppets. I'm talking Mother Nature. I just think

afraid of losing your lunch in the science lab.

We're throwing our whole ecological system out of whack by taking thousands

frogs out of the environment and putting them in the classroom.

I thought I could count on you guys.

You can.

We hear you. Look, if you want to cut class, we'll cover for you. Won't we,

guys? Sure, we'll lie for you.

Yeah, see?

Those are disgusting.

I'm going to go see if Miss Bliss will help me.

Nicky, wait!

Uh, can I have your frog?

Mr. Morton, I... Shh!

This is the crucial time.

What can I do for you, Miss Bliss?

I want to talk to you about one of your students, Nikki Coleman. Nikki, bright

girl. Yes, she is.

She's also very upset about dissecting a frog tomorrow.

She'll get over it. She has a very scientific mind.

She also has a very concerned heart and an even deeper conscience.

My dear Miss Bliss, every year I have a student who doesn't want to open up a

frog.

slimy. They're itchy.

They remind them of their Uncle Fred.

I've heard them all.

It's not so much the dissecting that bothers Mickey.

It's the killing of an innocent living creature.

Miss Bliss, I am not the heartless soul you must think I am. Oh, I... Let me

finish, please.

When I was a young man and my first science teacher brought out a cold, dead

frog,

Don't you think I had many of those same fears and concerns as Nicky?

No, I don't.

You're right.

I couldn't wait to split it open and view firsthand the wonders of life.

Mr. Martin, I really do respect your enthusiastic approach to science, but

is it absolutely necessary for Nicky to participate?

If she wants to pass this class, it is.

Well, what did he say?

He won't excuse you.

I'm not going to do it.

Nicky, tomorrow's assignment is part of your science requirement. If you don't

do it, you could fail the class.

I will not participate in any animal experiments.

Even for the grade.

Miss Bliss, what would you do if you were me?

I would weigh the facts carefully and think long and hard before I came to any

conclusions.

And then what?

Then I would listen to my conscience and do what my heart said was right.

Thanks, Miss Bliss.

You always know the right thing to do.

Just exactly what do you mean when you say, explain the significance of the

Louisiana Purchase?

I mean, explain the significance of the Louisiana Purchase.

Thanks for clearing that up for me.

Miss Bliss, report to the principal's office immediately.

Miss Bliss, are you in trouble?

I don't think so.

Well, gee, I guess this means we can't take our test.

Oh, yes, we can.

I'm putting you all on the auto pit.

And, Zach, you're in charge.

Me? You can't do this, Miss Bliss. I don't even trust myself.

Exactly. That's why I chose you. So come and sit at my desk, and I'll be back as

quick as I can.

What's the answer to number one?

Hey, hey, let's keep our roving eyes on our own paper.

Mr. Michael Gonzalez.

I hope it's a perfume you can't resist, Samuel.

Lighten up, Zach.

Mikey, talking.

Didn't we learn about you last week, Benedict Arnold?

Lisa, name calling.

on your permanent record.

Mickey, what happened? You all right?

I caught her down by the football field just after she released tomorrow's

specimens. Miss Bliss, it was beautiful.

I freed the frogs, just like you said. Mickey, I never said anything about

freeing the frogs. But you said, follow my conscience.

And my conscience said, free the frogs.

Miss Bliss, I am shocked.

and dismayed that you were a party to this nefarious incident.

I was not.

Of course she wasn't. You weren't, were you? No.

Nevertheless, now my teaching is disrupted and my class will be unable to

perform tomorrow's planned dissection.

Victory, Miss Bliss!

Mr. Belding, this is an outrage.

For every action, there must be an equal and opposite reaction.

What is the punishment?

Mickey?

That wasn't nice.

Satisfied?

Satisfied? A crime worthy of capital punishment cannot be assuaged by a

that wasn't nice.

You're right.

Nicky, don't do it again.

If I wasn't too hard on her. By the way, how's the globe?

Cretan.

You were very lucky, Nicky. I tried to make a statement and nobody even cares.

My life is over.

Again? What did you do this time?

Last week, Belding said we could take a field trip to the ballet.

Now he wants us to listen to it on the radio.

Where do you want the VCR?

I don't know. I never expected to get one.

Can Mr. Belding approve this?

Absolutely. And the entire set of American War.

They have one of Little Bighorn.

There's even a post -game interview with General Custard.

Just kidding.

Well, gee, Carrie, if I read Swan Lake with my own money, do you think maybe I

could borrow your player?

Oh, stop it, Tina.

What do you have on Belding revealing photos?

Tina. Something is going on, and I intend to get to the bottom of it, and I

not, repeat not, accept any more special treatment.

Here's a set of encyclopedias you've been waiting for.

Starting tomorrow.

Well, look who's here, our lady of the lily pad.

You know, I was really counting on slicing and dicing those little green

today. You'll live, and now so will the frogs.

You know, at lunch I couldn't help but noticing you take... Taking your knife

and splitting your broccoli.

Juices ran everywhere.

That was disgusting.

You know, lettuce is a living thing, too.

Why don't you just break into the cafeteria and free the salad?

Whose side are you on, Spritch?

Well, on one hand, there's your friendship to consider.

And on the other hand, there's the feel of a nice, cold pancreas against your

skin.

I'm sorry, Nicky.

Doesn't anybody care about frogs?

No.

Lisa, did you really want to dissect a frog?

No, I'd rather work on my cuticles.

And you're not mad at me for letting the frogs go?

No way.

And when Mr. Morton tells you to dissect a frog or fail the course, what are you

going to say?

Pass the scale.

Hello, Miss Bliss.

Nikki, you're right on time. Come on in.

I thought life was supposed to be simple when you're 14.

Everybody's blaming me for letting the frogs go.

Well, obviously not everybody wanted you to do it.

The others have their rights, too.

Didn't Mr. Morton discuss with you some of the scientific breakthroughs that

have started with animal dissection?

Well, sure.

But we're not doing heart or brain research.

Mikey wants to dissect a frog to find out how far he can dropkick a kidney.

I... Mikey really wants to do that?

You agree with me, don't you, Miss Bliss?

Nikki, I can't agree with what you've done.

But I do think there should be alternatives to dissection.

Right. And I think I may have found one.

I called a friend of mine at the university.

And he told me about this computer program that simulates a frog's anatomy.

Great. Now, all the kids can work on a computer instead of a frog.

Well, not all the kids.

Only the ones who feel like you and I do.

But the other kids don't have a choice.

I let all the froggies go.

Nicky, unfortunately, Mr. Morton just got a fresh delivery.

Probably from frogs or us.

Ah, Mr. Belding.

Are you all right?

You haven't seemed like yourself lately.

Nonsense. Of course I'm myself.

Oh, well, can you tell me then, why is it that every other teacher in the

is begging for supplies and I get the entire contents of Neiman Marcus'

Because you're special, Miss Blitz. Never forget that. And...

Why did you let Nikki off with just a mild warning when she deserved at least

attention? Oh, boy, there's no pleasing you, is there?

Just accept the gifts and don't worry.

Be happy.

Gifts like these don't come without a drink.

I want the truth.

All right.

I know about Trump Hill Academy.

What about it? They're trying to woo you away from me.

Woo? Yes, woo.

They wooed away two teachers last year, and I wasn't going to let them woo you,

too.

Lucky I found that letter in your mailbox.

You looked through my mail.

I was just going to hand it to you, but you had already left the office.

And you saw the return address on the envelope and assumed they were offering

a job.

Well, what else could it be?

Well, it could be one of those teachers from last year writing to say hello.

I hate it when I'm wrong.

I'm not talking to you.

Okay.

Oh, hi, Gary.

What did Belden give you now?

Rhode Island?

Tina, the whole thing has been one big mistake.

If you'll just give me a minute, I'll explain.

Am I glad I found you.

What is it, my love? Miss Bliss, I hate to tell you this, but Mr. Morton is

hopping mad.

If you get my drift.

Mr.

Morton? Miss Bliss!

She did it again.

Who did what?

Your Nicky has once again absconded with my four -legged hopping friends.

I think you're jumping to conclusions.

Are you sure they weren't misplaced? They are green. They jump and they

One tends not to misplace something like that.

Now, what are you going to do about it?

Well, I'll talk to her.

But first I have to... find her. Check the nearest pond.

You could be wrong, you know.

He's not wrong, Miss Bliss.

I took the frogs.

Welcome home, boys.

Nicky, I think you owe Mr. Morton an apology.

I'm sorry, Mr. Morton, for taking the frogs.

I just don't think it's right to experiment on any living thing.

And you'll never convince me otherwise.

However, I have to respect the rights and opinions of others.

And if I don't, I'm no different than the things I'm against.

Mickey?

I'm sure Mr. Morton can't argue with that.

I'm a man of science. I can argue with anything.

I returned all but one of the frogs.

Mine is living free.

This. leaves me no choice but to fail you.

Oh, I think if you take a look at this computer program, you'll see that you do

have a choice.

Good news, Mr. Morton. Mr. Belding says you can have your pick of anything on

this card.

Hang on a second. Aren't those my visual aids?

They were your visual aids.

Touch that globe again, Morton, and you'll be my next history lesson.

Every kid hates Parents and Teachers Week. I mean, especially me. And that's

when your parents come to school and the teachers tell them how you're really

doing. Well, I didn't think it could get any worse. But it did when my father

and Miss Bliss found out they were old friends.