Original subtitles

Hey, guys, come on in. I'll go put some music on. And I'll get the lights.

Oh, that was so romantic.

I mean, all those men just sacrificing their lives on the Titanic just so the

women can be saved.

Hey, you know what? If we had been there, we'd have held you in one arm and

the other to swim us to paradise.

Oh, that's so sweet, Tyree.

Steven, would you have saved me?

Baby, I'd have given up my team the lifeboat for you.

Alda, how'd you get in the lifeboat before me?

Uh, I was keeping your seat warm.

We are so lucky all of us can hang out like this. I mean, there are a lot of

couples who can't go out together and get along as well as we do.

All I'm saying is a woman is just as capable of going down with the sinking

as a man. Fine.

If you want to give me your seat in the lifeboat, I'll take it.

So you just leave me in a ship while you paddle away with a bunch of women?

Make up your mind. Either you want to drown or you want to be in the lifeboat.

want to be in the lifeboat, but I want the right to drown.

You're impossible.

Then again, there are some couples who should go out alone.

to be.

Step, step, step, step.

Even though I'm glad to be with ya.

I thought I'd feel what's real for me. Like you got to do what's right for you.

to make you angry, Tamara.

Well, I didn't mean to be unreasonable.

And you weren't. And that's what I like about you. You have strong opinions.

Well, that's what I like about you.

You like that I have strong opinions.

Anybody want to hear my strong opinion about your opinion?

Y 'all be on. I'm just glad they stopped arguing because I don't want anything

to get in the way of us going to that 702 concert.

Yeah. Right, right.

We got it all planned out. Now, we'll have dinner tomorrow night at Barry's

Pizza. Yeah.

And I got a two -for -one coupon.

And then, after the concert, we'll go play laser tag.

Excuse me?

Barry's Pizza?

Laser tag?

Why is this the first time I'm hearing about this?

Because this is the first time we're telling you.

Well, guys, um, maybe we don't like laser tag. Maybe we want to go...

dancing after the concert. Wait, why are you tripping? We can dance at the

concert. And then after, we'll dance on over the laser tag.

Why does everything have to be your way?

Everything doesn't have to be my way.

Yeah, it does.

Okay, guys, just settle down.

Yeah, calm down, Tamara. He's right.

You women always get so emotional, but nothing... You

women?

a woman has nothing to do with it.

You're only saying that because you're a woman.

Well now, I'm saying this.

Oh.

What was that all about?

No. No, no, no, no, no. What I said was you know how to marry kids. No, no, no,

no, no. You did not say that. You said you women.

You did say women.

Sit down. Sit down. You just take care of your woman. Sit down.

All right, listen, Tia, don't go getting all emotional.

Emotional? Can you believe these guys?

Now, hold up, Tia. My baby didn't say anything.

Because you know your boys are bugging, right?

Oh, baby, you know it's all good.

It's all good?

No, man.

Oh, don't play dumb, Tyree. What?

Let's go to you. Yeah.

We have to make sure Tamir's not too emotional.

Yeah, you know how we women get.

Nobody.

Oh, dim lighting?

Soft music?

You know, back in my day, we used to do this with girls.

We had a little argument.

Oh, it must have been a big little argument.

What was it all about?

We don't know.

Been there.

Okay, what happened?

Tamera and Jordan, they were talking about what we were going to do after the

concert. Yeah, and all I said was, you women always get... Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Let me stop you right there.

What?

When you're talking to women, never, and I mean never, start a conversation with

you women.

Well, that doesn't make any sense.

I know, I know, but trust me.

Just let them cool off for a bit. Give them their spade.

They'll be back and all will be forgotten.

Ray,

you must have been a man back in the day.

Back in the day?

I have you know I still get down with the foxy ladies.

Uh,

Jordan?

See?

You still a man, Ray.

Yes, Tamara.

In case you haven't noticed, this date is over.

Time for phase two.

Buy them something.

Did you tell him to leave?

Oh, I told him to leave, all right. And you know what? what they did? What? They

left. Well,

did Tyreek say anything?

No. And the way he didn't say anything said everything that needed to be said.

Oh, no, he didn't.

Oh, yes, he did.

Well, what about, uh, Stephen?

Oh, please, don't get me started with Stephen. I knew it. I knew it.

I don't know what's up with Jordan.

You guys, he never argued with me when we first started dating.

Oh, yeah, he did, Tamera.

You just thought it was cute.

No, no, no, no. I thought he was cute.

But he's changed.

He used to call me 18 times a day.

Now it's down to one lousy message on the answering machine.

Hey, you know what?

Tyreek is the same way.

Talking about he's busy working.

Uh -huh. I found out about tonight's date from a post -it stuck on my locker.

And to think I... I actually thought it was romantic.

Hey, girl.

I thought your boyfriends would be here.

Well, not up here, but you know. You know what I'm saying. So, uh, where are

they?

We had an argument and they went home early.

Hey, Mom.

You're home early, too. Did you have an argument with your new boyfriend?

Police! No man could disagree with anything that looks this good.

I ended the date early.

Why? Because it keeps them guessing.

Guessing about what?

Oh, baby.

It's all right here in chapter six.

The laws.

A dating guide for women of the new millennium. Mm -hmm. It teaches you how

lay down the laws to these men and make them love you for it. You say jump, they

outleap Michael Jordan.

Well, does it really work?

Look out the window and see if James is still waiting outside in his car.

Why is he still here?

I left him so stunned he forgot how to drive.

He'll be gone in about five minutes.

Any longer than that, you call the police.

Hey,

what are you guys doing here? Tim Diabian called and said to meet him

Tamara called me, too.

You know what this means, right?

Yeah.

Well, no, not really.

It means we won.

Ray was right.

All we had to do was let him chill for a while.

Yeah, yeah. I'm glad we didn't buy him gifts like Ray said. Yeah, yeah, because

only chumps buy gifts. Only chumps buy gifts. You're right.

Hey,

what's up, ladies?

Baby.

We didn't come down here to have nachos with you.

Then why are we here?

Well, we just wanted to talk to you guys about a relationship and some ways to

make them work better. You see, we've made a list of laws that you guys need

follow. Take one and pass it around.

Law one.

The boyfriends consult the girlfriends before planning any date.

Law two. No dates for the weekend can be made after 11 .59 p .m. Wednesday.

Three.

Girlfriends must receive two...

Just called to say hi. Phone calls per day?

So, what do you think?

Well, I'm cool.

Whatever. No.

No, no. Heck no.

You women always come up... Oh, no. He did not go there again.

Oh, yes, he did.

Yeah, I'm there.

You women are crazy.

A list of laws?

Oh, shoot.

Are we going to take that guy?

No. This is wax.

We're not doing this.

How about your hearing? Oh, no, you... Now we're talking.

Boy, can you believe what he just did? Yeah, it worked.

Look, baby, I bought you a charm. Oh, no. Look at that.

cool with our laws aren't you see you see listen to him you see you buy them

jewelry and now they're making demand are you gonna take that yeah no no

you're not this is only the beginning if we okay these laws there'll be more

soon there'll be no more two -for -one coupon dates you know what he's right

yeah i want my earrings back

You leave us no choice.

We're going on a strike. Yeah.

What does that mean?

It means you guys are going to be dancing with each other at the 702

At least we'll be there.

Fine. Fine.

Coming up in here dressed like G .I. James.

Girls, we did the right thing. I know that's right. Yep, and I still got to

my little baby hippo.

Excuse me?

When are these logs going to kick

in? I'm saying, girl, it's only six hours till the 702 concert.

We don't need the guys to go to a concert.

Why? Do you have tickets?

No.

But we got the CD.

I was with you till I became your dance partner.

Come on, guys.

Now, look.

In order to be respected by the guys, we gotta stand strong and stay focused.

Now, look. It's all right here in chapter 12.

Stand strong, stay focused.

Well, isn't there a chapter in there called This Ain't Working?

Now, hey, girls.

Anybody seen a TV guy?

No?

Lisa, I am so glad you're up here.

Look, Laverne and Shirley here are losing faith in the laws.

So, um, bet you got a hot date tonight, huh?

Yeah, with Walker, Texas Ranger.

Wait, what happened to James?

We broke up.

Said I had too many laws.

How many laws did you ask him to follow?

Just the first 32.

Oh, take my advice, girls. If you want to have a mature relationship with a

do not play childish mind games.

Now, excuse me, I think I'm going to go and call James and hang up on him.

Now, Reek, you've got it made. It must be nice having your own place over your

job. You know it.

God, man.

This is cool. This is cool. Yeah, this is cool.

Just us guys hanging out.

No girls and no laws. No laws. That's right.

This is whack, man.

No, whack is being a whipped brother. Stay strong.

Tyree? Yeah, come on in, Ray. Oh, hey, guys.

Tyree, did you change the oil in the white stretch?

Uh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it right before I clocked out.

Ah, good.

Hey. So tonight's the night of the big concert, huh?

You guys back in good standing with the ladies?

No. We bought gifts, too.

Uh -oh, what happened?

They came up with this list of laws, right? And then Jordan said, no way.

Then Tamara goes, we're on strike, and here we are.

And we're okay with that. We don't care if they never call.

Then why are you waiting by the phone?

That's Tyreek's phone.

Guys, guys, guys.

Let me pull up a bucket seat.

Give you some advice.

Look, guys, you're going about this all wrong.

What should we do? Tell them you're sorry.

Hey, I like that plan.

No way. They're the ones trying to tell us what to do. Why should we apologize?

Oh, so you want the long version.

Talk it out with the girls.

Tell them how you feel.

Listen to their point of view.

Then tell them you're sorry.

I was with you up until the I'm sorry part.

I can't do it.

All right, suit yourself.

I gotta get back to work.

Oh, but you know, you guys maybe should bring a sweater with you tonight.

You can drape it over the chair next to you. Maybe people will think your dates

have gone to the bathroom.

Wait, wait, hold on, Brady.

Check it out. Just how sorry do we have to be?

Somewhere between cards and flowers.

Well, I'm not crawling back.

Once you get down on your knees, you end up with footprints on your back.

That's all I'm saying.

who I saw Diabion all lovey -dovey with at the mall.

Who? Steven.

You don't say.

No, no, no, no, I do say. And then when I confronted him, they said the problem

was between Jordan and me.

How you doing, Tamara?

Hey, Tyreek. So anyway, Diabion was all up on Steven like... Like

you all up on Tyreek.

Why is he here?

We're about to eat.

Dee, how could you do this?

Well, we're both kind of hungry.

your sister out like this.

Look, I didn't, Tamera.

Now, this is really between you and Jordan. Yeah, and you and Jordan can't

your problems if you don't talk.

Yeah. All it takes is a little face -to -face negotiating.

I think the boy can eat his own cookie.

Please.

Uh -huh.

It's Jordan.

Now, you see what happens when you stand strong and stay focused?

Now let's just see what he has to say.

Yes.

Here, take these stupid concert tickets because I'm not going.

What? Don't tell me to take those tickets.

You take them and take somebody else.

No, you take somebody else.

Don't tell me to take somebody else. Well, fine, then take yourself. Here's

ticket. Fine.

Thirty -eight bucks?

Fine! No problem.

Here. I owe you thirty -eight bucks.

Well, at least they started talking.

You having a good time, too?

little baby hippo.

I got my man and my new earrings.

Well, being by yourself is even better.

Anybody want the last jalapeno?

Oh, shoot.

Somebody change seats with me.

Did you hear something?

Oh, no, no, nothing.

I asked who wanted the last jalapeno.

Oh, great.

Anybody want to change seats with me? Been there, said that.

They're not talking to us.

Well then, I guess I'm sitting here.

Okay? Don't ask me. I'm not talking to you either.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Blue Shack. Right now, put your hands

together and welcome 702...

couples out there that's trying to get it together okay you

want to dance okay got the obvious

leave them giving up their principle just to be together?

Yeah. You don't see us acting that way.

That's because we're too mature.

You're right about that.

We're mature enough to have arguments and still, you know,

like each other.

I'm not going to argue with that.

You know, Tamara, you and I have evolved to a level of understanding.

Just shut up and ask me to dance.

Okay. But first, you shut up and take this.

A little lifeboat?

Yes. And as long as you wear this necklace, I'll never let you drown.

But you'll always have the right to.

Don't go getting all emotional, all right? You called me Tamira.

Oh.

Hold up. Hold up, dog. Oh,

my bad.

Oh, no,

he did it.

Whoa! I'm always doing the first time.

Thank you.

Hey, guys.

Sorry, did you change the oil in the white stretcher?

Oh, yeah, yeah, I did it.

We're not taping this, Ari.