Original subtitles

Oh, come on, Darren.

Can't you see that's not Samantha?

Don't you have homework?

Hello? That's what the bus is for.

Is dinner ready yet?

No. Ray's still working on it. Well, I think it's wonderful that Ray enjoys

cooking so much.

Yeah, and Dad's getting better at it, too. Yeah, do you know what they say?

make the best chefs. Well, all I know is that's a real fine quality in a man,

girls.

Oh, but on the other hand, a girl's got to eat.

Wait a minute. She doesn't have to eat this much.

I ordered Chinese. I ordered Mexican.

Now, look, we don't want to hurt Ray's feelings, so let's get this stuff

upstairs before he sees us.

Athena's Grecian Palace.

Who ordered Greek?

I did.

I ain't ever gonna let you go.

should I pick you up?

This is for you, Roger.

What's this, money for popcorn?

No, it's a dollar so you can buy a clue.

Man, that's cold.

But at least I'm starting to turn a profit.

Hi, Tamara.

Bye, Roger.

Cheapskate.

Pathetic.

Oh, wait.

I must have missed all the women hanging on your arm.

I'll pay some myself.

And it's working.

Listen, I think I know what my problem is with women, Frankie.

You ugly?

No.

See that dude?

One woman.

See that other dude?

One woman. And me, no woman. Now what does that tell you?

Tells me I'm hanging with the wrong dude.

No. My problem is I'm going after both Tia and Tamera. Neither twin feels

special. I gotta make a choice.

How you gonna choose between Tia and Tamera?

Hey. I'm a sensitive, caring person. I'll just handle this in a very delicate

way. I kick one twin to the curb.

Well, which one?

Good question, Franklin.

Should I go with the studious, buttoned -down Teal Landry or the reckless devil

-may -care Tamera Campbell?

Yeah, Franklin. Tamera. I'm definitely going for Tamera.

Excuse me, Tamera.

I'm sorry.

Oh, it's just you, Roger.

I think I should go for 10.

Good idea.

All right, all right. Good game, Terrence. I would have had you had I

hitting my J. Yeah, or even the backboard.

All right, next time, full court.

What on?

Hey, baby, you ready for tonight?

Dot and edit shrimp hut? Oh, you got it.

I'm going back to get me a beer. You want anything, Terrence?

I mean that I can get you.

I mean from the refrigerator.

I mean, I never mind.

always go to dot netters. I thought tonight we'd go somewhere a little bit

elegant.

Tonight's a special night.

I got something important I want to ask you.

You're not asking me to marry you again, are you?

Well, yeah. Will you?

No.

Might as well go to dot netters. Wait, wait, wait.

Why won't you marry me? I mean, I want kids. My biological clock is ticking.

Well, you want to have kids? Fine. Go right ahead.

But if you want me to have kids, you can forget it. I don't want to spend

another nine months carrying a child.

Wait a minute. minute wait a minute you adopted tia yeah but i still had to

carry i couldn't afford a stroller but if you marry me you wouldn't have to

worry about that i'm the manager of a food boy what does that mean you steal

a shopping cart i know it means i'll take care of us and and and baby terry

i'm getting morning sickness already we'll just talk about this later tonight

bye baby

They hate to come in here, you two?

Where's Terrence?

He had to get back to the food boy.

You two sure look like you're in love.

Yeah. He asked me to marry him again.

You gonna marry him this time?

No.

I'm gonna break up with him.

Well, that'll hurt the marriage.

Look, Ray, now I can't continue to lead him on.

Terrence wants to get married and have a big family. I don't even want a

hamster.

Gotta be honest with him.

I like Terrence.

I want what's best for him.

I should just give him his freedom so he can go find somebody else.

You want to date other guys, huh? Oh, yeah.

You sure you want to do this? I mean, you're giving up a lot.

I know. He's a wonderful man. Not to mention all those wonderful gifts he

showers me with.

That day -old bread, them dinner cans, that slightly bruised fruit.

Gotta make some sacrifices, you know.

Have you told Tia?

Oh, no.

I better go talk to her.

Tia and Terrence were really close.

I hope she's okay with this.

Yeah, well, maybe I'll take her some of these dented generic factory second

irregular one -ply food board tissues.

Tia, can I talk to you a minute?

Sure.

Honey, this may be painful, but we'll get through it together.

What is it, Mom?

I... I've decided to break up with Terrence.

Well, duh.

What do you mean, well, duh?

I totally understand.

You do?

Yeah. You and Terrence want different things. I mean, he probably wants to get

married and have a family. Well, you already have a family, and you just

eight other men.

Boy, you are certainly wise beyond your years.

Well, I was sitting two feet from the door and I pretty much heard the whole

conversation.

Come here.

Can I talk to you for a minute?

It's important.

It's about our relationship.

Oh, you mean the one where you grovel at my feet and I humiliate you?

It's that kind of sarcasm that has brought me to this tough decision.

It's over between us.

Us? You and me?

Over?

You may be laughing on the outside, but I think we both know what's going on

inside. I'm laughing on the inside, too.

None of your body's gonna be laughing when I tell you this. That's someone

Good for you, Roger.

Who's the poor, pathetic skag?

Actually, T is the poor, pathetic skag.

And T is the apple of my eye. The lemon of my pledge.

The fruit of my looms.

For example, the way she opens her locker. So slow, so poetic, so not

Whatever. She's so unique. Her hair, her eyes, her mouth.

We have the exact same stuff, Roger.

Yeah, but your stuff's got a bad attitude.

Cheers.

Cheers.

Yeah, I broke up with him right then.

Dot and Etta Shrimp Hut. You wouldn't believe the crying.

Terrence started crying?

No, Dot and Etta.

They really love Terrence.

But he's a little sniffly, too.

Must have been pretty tough.

Yeah, Terrence was so upset he couldn't even finish his shrimp gumbo. And I got

so upset that I did finish his shrimp gumbo.

Sorry to hear that.

Well, it had to be done. I just hope Terrence realizes we're all for the

I hope he gets over it before the piston game tonight.

You going to the game with him?

You don't mind, do you?

No, no, no. No, you just be his friend. Share his pain. Let yours be that

shoulder he can lean on.

Hey, probably won't even be much fun at first, but I'm sure in a couple of

months, be his old self again.

People grieve in many different ways.

Oh, Lisa, this is so embarrassing.

Well, Terrence, you don't need to be embarrassed.

No, I meant for you.

You said you were going out on a date tonight.

Well, he's on his way. There was a late vote in the Senate.

Hi, I'm Patrice.

And I'm Donna.

Hi.

So nice to meet you.

Poor man was so broken up, he went out and picked up the first two bimbos he

could find. This is so sad.

Patrice here is a professor of English lit at Wayne State University, and Donna

here is a pediatric specialist at Beaumont Hospital.

No, Terrence asked me to marry him, and I turned him down.

Twice.

Why don't you guys wait in the limo for us?

Limo?

Why don't you guys wait in the limo? Oh, that's because all the time I was

saving up for our wedding, but now...

By the way, Ray, a change of plans.

I scored us four tickets for Motown on Ice.

Motown on Ice!

You know, Terrence, I can't blame Lisa for getting upset. I mean, when you

about it, this is pretty insensitive of you, bringing two women over like this.

Donna's for you.

You're the man!

Lisa, what are you doing?

Training.

So, how was Motown all night?

Oh, you haven't lived until you've seen Brian Boitano moonscape to sexual

healing.

Why are you throwing away the canned food?

I'm getting rid of everything we ever bought from that man's store, and I'm

giving it to the hungry.

Yeah, then we'll be hungry.

I don't know why you're getting upset. You told him you wanted to date other

people. Yes, I wanted to date other people. I didn't say anything about him

dating other people.

Listen, Lisa, I hope my hanging out with Terrence won't be a problem for you.

No, not gonna be a problem for me. But if I see that man hanging around here

again, it'll be a problem for our legal system.

Well, it's all right if I see him, just so I don't bring him around here.

No!

Can't you read between the lines?

Well, why not? I want to hang out with Terrence.

I will tell you why not, Ray.

Because seeing him around here not depressed and not miserable will just

depressed and miserable.

It'll make you feel any better. He's not always happy either.

Really? Right. He's got a date tonight with three different women. I don't know

how he's going to get out of that one.

You know, Ray, if you don't have anything horrible to say about Terrence,

don't say anything at all.

Let me get that for you, Tia.

Ow!

Hi, Mom.

Hi, Ray.

Honey, I hope you're not too hungry. Dinner's going to be a little light

tonight.

Thanks for getting the door, Roger. You can give me back my books now, Roger.

I'm home.

By the way, Tia, I made you lunch for tomorrow.

Roger.

Well, it would be a shame to waste a heart -shaped bologna sandwich.

I hope you didn't make my lunch.

Don't worry, I did.

Good.

Tia, I have something to ask you. The one date you can't refuse.

Okay, try me. How about you and me? No.

Samara, can I ask you something? Let me stop you right there, Roger. I won't go

out with you either.

Actually, I need the 411 on Tia.

I want to surprise her. Take her someplace special, fun and romantic.

I don't think you heard me, Roger. I said I would not go out with you.

Yeah, I heard you. But I'm not asking you out.

My best friend Frankie, he's desperate. Maybe he'll go out with you.

No, no, no, I can't promise you.

Anyway, there's got to be someplace loud enough so if Tia yells at me, no one

will hear.

Hey, bowling.

Yeah, she likes to bowl.

Great. I like to bowl, too.

Well, maybe Tia and I will see you around the lanes.

but we washed it down with a fine Merlot.

What'd you have for dessert?

Chocolate souffle, I believe it was.

I haven't seen him. I don't know where he is. I had no contact with him.

I know. I just want you to know that I appreciate everything you've done. I

to thank you.

You've been very respectful of my feelings by not hanging around with

Oh, well.

Good night.

Oh, Ray, about that headband.

I can explain this. No, you can't. Lose it. It went out in the 70s.

See, Tia, well, she's at the library.

Ah, beauty and brains.

At least she doesn't try to get by on just her looks.

Anyway, tell her I came by.

Nice flowers.

Just one of the benefits of being my woman.

Roger, why don't you come in? We need to straighten some things out.

Good idea.

Because when Tia and I get married, you and I are going to be related. And

there's nothing that destroys a marriage faster than nasty, jealous in -laws.

So what's on your mind?

You're not bothering me anymore, Roger.

Yeah? That's bothering me.

Really? I kind of miss the way you used to spend hours on end following me

around and giving me the creeps.

We did have something, didn't we?

Yeah, I guess we did.

Well, we can get it back if we try.

What about Tia?

Don't worry, you little head. I'll just let her down gently.

Tia, you're toast.

In time, you'll get over it.

So why did you bring me the flowers?

Uh, these aren't for you.

Boy, what an ego.

They're for Tamera.

Wait a minute.

Tamera?

Well, what's wrong with me?

You got here late.

But he said I was special.

Obviously not quite special enough.

Why don't you just get in something skippy and wrestle over me?

Shut up, Roger.

Hey, don't tell Roger to shut up. Thank you. I tell Roger to shut up. Shut up,

Roger.

You want something else to drink? Yeah, sure.

Excuse me, miss.

That's Tanya, and what can I get you, handsome?

We'll just take two more beers.

Either these are really expensive beers or that's your phone number.

I just wanted you to have it at your fingertips.

The service here is great, isn't it?

Oh, by the way, my boss... I said we can definitely use his cabin up at Traverse

City so we can get some fishing in next weekend.

I don't think I can make it in.

What are you talking about?

Just not working out, right?

I don't understand.

What about our plans?

What about our weekend at the cabin? What did I do?

It's not you, okay?

It's someone else.

Who?

It's Letha, okay?

She had a real problem with my female.

I hear what you're saying, man. I guess we did sort of put you in the middle of

it.

Maybe in time, things change.

Yeah, right, right, right.

I'm gonna miss you, man.

Back at you.

I'll call you later, Tanya.

What a waste.

Hey, breakups are tough.

Buy you a drink?

your feelings a lot of consideration.

Well, I had a talk with Terrence and I... These are food boy bags.

Yeah.

Well, you said you'd never set foot in there again.

I got hungry.

So what about Terrence?

Well, I've been hanging out with Terrence behind your back.

You have?

Yeah. But we had a talk and I told him we couldn't hang out together anymore.

Hmm.

You're never going to see Terrence again?

Yeah, it's no big deal.

And this is out of consideration for my feelings? Absolutely.

Are you crazy?

You thought I never wanted you to see Terrence again? Where'd you get that

From you.

Oh, Ray, that was just breakup talk.

So you're saying you don't mind if I see Terrence?

You've got to see him. I need somebody to tell me how he's doing, who he's

dating, how his life is deteriorating.

Suppose I want him back.

You were my end.

Now, I want you to get on that phone. You call Terrence. You tell him you want

to see him again.

No, forget it. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're right, Ray. No, I have some

pride.

You know, you could just ask them, could you borrow a tool or something?

Good idea.

Then we can just spin with it.

Well, Frankie, my plan didn't work out.

I've been trying to make things happen.

I just have to let them happen naturally. Darn, Locker.

Like how we're out with our locker stuff.

Exactly.

Problem with your locker? Can I help? Sure.

Thanks, Roger.

Hi,

Roger. You're good, Roger.

Shut up and get the nurse.