Original subtitles

Hey, Tamara, look what I found!

Whoa, Mom, he's so cute!

Oh, he looks like Garfield.

Where'd you find him? He's a... him, right?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I left a fabric store downtown, and out of the alleyway comes this

cat, and he jumps right into my arms.

He takes one look at me, I look at him, it's love at first meow.

Is he still hungry? I mean, we can... Oh, no, I fed him a tuna fish sandwich,

hamburger, and a root beer float.

Oh, did you hear that?

Oh, Mom, can we keep him?

Hello.

Look, for dinner tonight, I was thinking we could all go out... That's a cat.

Ooh, good for you, Ray. You know your animal kingdom.

Lisa said we can keep her.

She did?

Well, I didn't exactly say that. What I said was... Yeah, that was pretty much

it.

Uh -huh. Well, I got a little carried away, Ray, but it's your house. It's

completely up to you.

Look, I don't want to be the bad guy, but... Please, Dad.

Well, he's going to have fleas.

Listen to him talk.

He's going to get hair all over the place.

We'll call him Little Ray.

Please.

All right, I guess we can keep him.

Thanks.

And Little Ray says, thanks.

I ain't ever gonna look.

Now that everybody knows, I ain't ever gonna let you go.

Mr. Santa!

Tia, have you seen my history book? I can't find it anywhere.

Well, where were you studying last?

Studying? Never mind. Here it is. I found it. Great.

Perfect size.

As you can see, we have different approaches to education.

I use my books for studying.

I use mine for ventilation.

You know, you can't get through life without an education.

Try getting through life without air.

Come here. Tia, come here. Good guess.

Did you hear that the history exam is going to be 40 % of our grade? You guys,

just passed by the teacher's lounge, and they're sitting in front of the stack

of history books laughing like maniacs. So we better hit the books.

You guys ever hear of burnout?

Wait a minute. How do you do that?

Do what?

How can you tell them apart?

You can look at any doofus to do that one. Good morning, Tia.

Tamera?

That's Tamera.

Oh, uh, right.

Thanks, Jamie.

I'm Sarah.

Of course you are.

Well, uh, Tia.

Um, I'm Tia.

Of course you are.

Your grades came in from your old school, and it seems you're an honor

She is?

They sent your honor roll certificate, a button, a bumper sticker, and your

retainer you left in your old locker.

That's not my retainer.

Ew.

I'll take care of it.

Good work, Tia. And Tamira?

Nice jacket.

Whoa. Can't believe that an honor student's actually in the crew.

Oh, brain on board.

Don't worry, Tia. We won't tell anybody.

You made the honor roll.

Wow, beauty and brains?

You think you can tutor me? Roger, you're an A student.

But I can still learn so much from you.

Keep it up, Roger.

There's claw marks, and his hair is on the chair.

That's circumstantial evidence, Ray.

Look, his collar. What about that, huh?

He was framed.

That was my favorite chair.

Well, now, look, just relax right now. I stole for a living. I can fix it.

Just want you to know I hate that cat.

He's just here to bring a little joy in your life, like me.

No, for sure.

But we have a prime Harry suspect.

How was school, girl?

Lame. It was okay.

The vice principal gave me this.

Uh -oh.

Oh, it's just some honor roll stuff.

Hey, congratulations.

And you keep your uh -ohs to yourself.

Ooh.

Look at this, a bumper sticker.

All I need is a car to put it on.

I'm so proud of you, honey.

That is great, Tia.

honest student ever since I can remember.

In nursery school, while all the other girls were finger -painting... Mom,

tell the story.

Eiffel Tower, out of clay.

Mom.

It's all right to brag about your own daughter. Right, Ray? Hey, what else are

they good for, huh?

You know, Tamara's a pretty good student herself.

I am?

Yes, dear.

Tell me about those awards you got.

For good citizenship and kickball.

Yes. Well -behaved and a foot of steel.

I don't know about you, Ray, but I was never a great student.

No.

Excuse me, boy genius.

Made the honor roll a couple times.

I didn't know that.

Yeah. My favorite subject was history.

Really? Mine, too.

No kidding.

Look, if you could go back to any time in history, where would you go?

No context.

The Renaissance.

Oh, multi -benny. I love the Renaissance. Can you imagine meeting the

Venice? Oh, you hear that, Ray? She knows the Doge.

Or going to Lorenzo de' Medici's Palazzo and seeing all that incredible art.

What about when Chimabue tried to brush away the fly in Giotto's painting?

And the fly was part of the painting?

Oh,

you're

really looking good, Ray.

Well, thanks. I've been burning time at the old gym.

I was talking to Little Ray.

Oh, of course you were.

So that's great about Tia.

Yeah.

She works so hard.

You know, I don't know what it is, but Tia actually likes to study.

My child defies my imagination.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

That's right. Get out of here, you little hairball.

You know, you must be really proud of Tia. Yeah.

I can't wait till she gets famous so I can ride her coattails and tell

off.

How'd you get her to study so hard?

Oh, when she was a baby, I used to read to her all the time. Anything I could

get my hands on.

You know what her favorite was?

No, what? The back of the cream of wheat box.

The classics.

Oh, no, no. We were into modern literature, too.

Trix, Cocoa Puffs, Cap 'n Crunch.

You know, I tried everything to encourage Tamara.

But she just doesn't work as hard as Tia.

I guess she just isn't the studying kind.

She's a bright kid.

You give us some time.

Yeah.

You know, if Tamara ever made the honor roll, I would tell the world.

Tia, have you seen my history book?

You're not going to open that window. It's too cold.

No, I'm going to study.

Are you feeling all right?

Yeah, I just want to make an A in the test tomorrow.

Tamara, are you doing all this because I made the honor roll? You made the honor

roll? Oh, congratulations.

Do you need any help? I mean, our teachers are covering the same material.

no, I'm fine. It's just time for me to get off my butt.

Okay, I'm going to bed.

I always like to get a good night's sleep before a test.

I usually get my sleep during the test.

Good night.

Good night.

Okay, I can do this.

I've got my pen, my pencil, highlighter, dictionary, hiccups, and my study.

What chapter's on the test again?

Um, 1 through 14.

Ooh.

Tia, I can't do it.

Do what?

The history test. I can't take it, can't pass it. You gotta help me. You're just

nervous. You'll do fine.

No, Marek, I'm gonna fail.

No, you won't. Yes, I will. Tia, I can't remember anything.

You gotta take the test for me, please.

You mean cheat?

No, no, it's not cheating. You see, if I was sitting next to you looking at your

paper, that would be cheating. But I'm not even gonna be in the room.

can't be you.

Sure you can. We share a chromosome.

Yeah, we like old times.

Tamara, I'm not gonna do it. You've got to. I have to make the honor roll.

I need a bumper sticker.

Tamara, you're losing it.

Tia, you don't know what I'm going through.

You know how your mom is always proud of you?

I just want my dad to feel the same way.

Well, we're never gonna pull it off.

Tia, you're the only one who can help me.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Thanks. Oh, and Tia, remember, I tap my pencil when I'm nervous, and sometimes I

bite my nails.

You're the best, Tia.

Okay, great.

Oh, go, go, go. Oh, and Tia?

Yeah? I need a 96.

Samara, come on, hurry up. Take a seat. Right, yeah.

I'm going to take my seat now.

Absolutely.

Here I go. This is me, Tamara.

I'll alert the media.

Hey, Tamara.

Remember what we were talking about yesterday?

Uh -huh. Sure.

So what did he say? Yes or no?

Uh, yes.

Great. Pick you up Friday night.

Wear something sexy.

Pass your papers to the front.

Hey, Tia. Hey.

What are you doing in Tamara's class?

It's a long story.

Tell me about it, Tia.

He got the point.

I just can't stop.

I feel so guilty about everything.

Yeah, but did you have to tell him about stealing the comic books when you were

five?

I just felt like staring in the air.

I hate Samara.

See you Friday night, sexy.

What?

I'll tell you later. We have enough problems.

What'd he say? It was awful. You should have seen the way he looked at us. Like

we were cheaters. We are cheaters.

Now I'll always be known as cheaters. Everywhere we go, cheaters.

Now I'll never be president.

Get a grip, Tia. It's not like the whole world knows. Hey, girls, I heard you

guys were cheating.

Who told you?

It's all over school.

Bobby told Adam, who told Ralph, who told Larry.

Notice I didn't mention any girls. They're not part of my loop.

What are we gonna do?

Sarah, you're always in trouble. What happens next?

All right, the principal is definitely going to call your house this afternoon.

It's usually around 4 or 5, and if your parents are anything like my parents,

we'll be dead by 6.

6. Whenever my dad's disappointed in me, he just looks at me hurt. Then he gets

into his car and goes for a drive.

I hope he kills vaccine.

That's so sad, Roger.

Want to cheer me up?

We can't let our folks find out. You guys have got to get home and intercept

call. We're already cheaters.

You want us to be liars, too?

Do you want my dad and your mom to find out?

Oh, gosh. We're going to be liars.

No one's upstairs.

No one's in the kitchen.

Okay, all we have to do is get that call. I can't believe I listened to you.

know you're the one that got us into trouble.

Me? I did it for you.

Well, who asked you?

You did.

the principal. Okay, we gotta be a parent. Okay, you be your dad.

I can't be my dad. You be your mom. I can't be my mom. You be...

to make Rosie.

Bye -bye.

We did it. You were great. We're in the clear.

Oh.

Hi, girls. How was your day? We cheated.

I just can't believe you two.

What were you thinking about? What was going on in your heads?

Nothing. Nothing.

You two could be suspended for something like this. This could go on your

permanent record.

could take it back. Huh. Now they want to take it back.

That's your best sale.

They didn't mean to do it.

They didn't mean to do it.

We're sorry.

You're going to be more than sorry.

Gee, I am so disappointed in you.

How could you do this?

I'm really sorry.

Tamara, don't you have something to say?

I think Tia said it all.

What?

What's the matter with you?

Nothing's the matter with me, okay?

No, it's not okay. I want to know why you're being such a smart aleck. Well,

least you finally think I'm smart about something.

And what does that suppose to mean?

It means you think I'm the dumb one.

Tamara!

Tia, you know, I expected more of you.

You know what you did was bad.

Yeah, Mom, bad.

But you did it for good reasons. Yeah, good, good. But it was still bad. Oh,

yeah.

Well,

I know you're just trying to help somebody, honey. I know what you're

through. You do?

Did you ever cheat, Mom?

No, baby.

I made my deeds good old -fashioned way.

Tamara, where'd you get this dumb one idea?

Dad, let's just forget it.

No, I will not forget it. I want to know.

From you, okay?

From me?

Yeah.

You guys were talking about the honor roll and bumper stickers and Jato and

fly.

You did all this because of something I said?

You went on and on with Tia.

And then... And then you said you'd tell the world if I was an honor student.

You heard that.

Tamara, don't you know how great I think you are? It doesn't matter, Dad.

It does matter.

Tamara, I'm always thinking about the things you've done.

I remember the first time you walked. We didn't just walk. You sort of ran

across the room.

And when I bought you your first bike, you wouldn't even let me put the

wheels on it.

You wanted to make it on your own.

And how about the third grade play? You were the star. I was just one of the

bumblebees.

You were the best Bumblebee.

I forgot my pollination speech and ran offstage.

You didn't just run offstage. You sort of buzzed offstage.

You buzzed all around the auditorium.

I couldn't find the exit.

But no one knew.

You made it like it was part of the play, the best part of the play.

You're always doing creative things like that.

But I'm not going to make the honor roll.

Forget about the honor roll. But Tia... Forget about Tia. She has nothing to do

with this.

What do you want to do?

Well, I guess I wouldn't mind being on a roll.

Just to see what it's like.

Well, you could buzz around the library.

I'm sorry about all this, Dad.

I'm sorry too, honey.

It pains me to have to ground you for two weeks.

Huh?

Uh -huh.

Okay.

Dad, did you really think I was the best bumblebee?

Yeah.

Can I get a week off for it?

Just being creative.

I'm grounded.

Me too.

Are you mad at me?

A little.

Tia, I'm sorry I got you in trouble.

I guess I was kind of competitive.

It won't be so bad in when we're only grounded for a week.

A week? I got two weeks.

I think that's fair.

Yeah, I guess it is.

So what do you want to do?

Well... We can sit here and sulk or we can go up to our room and study.

Sulk.

Hey, girls, can I hang out with you guys?

Study.

You better go study.

You cheaters.

So we blew that one, but on the next history test, we did a lot better.

Tia got an A and I got a B, but you see.

I had a lot of catching up to do. So I guess my B is better than her A, which

makes me the smart one.

Huh?

Do it, I mean.

Anyway, I guess everyone's happy.

Well, almost everybody.

Lisa!

Lisa!

You love it, huh?

What are you thinking? What did you do to my chair?

I brought it back from the dead.

I love the old... fabric it wasn't your palette ray it was winter you're spring

i don't care what season it is doesn't go with anything in here you wait till i

finish the rest of this room no no no you leave this room alone and i want

chair ripping furball out of here i want my old chair back okay okay everything

will be boring just like you like it fine that's just the way i like it