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Subtitles by explosiveskull

She would like...

I watched her go outside,

and she would get on all fours

and open up her mouth and pick up like you know...

Like dirt off the ground?

- Then she would eat the dirt. - Right in the mouth.

Was that a sex thing?

For me, yes, it was.

I've cherished my memory of that day.

I wonder what kind of dark and obscure sexuality

can get pleasure out of eating dirt.

But it definitely wasn't

a performance art thing?

No, no, she did do a little bit of performance art,

but it was a lot more traditional than anything like that.

Can I show you guys something?

Come here. Boom.

What is that?

It's pure molly that I got from my French neighbor.

- Seriously? - Yeah.

He says it's incredible.

One, two, three, four, five.

- Tonight's gonna be the night? - Yeah, man.

- Hi. - Whoa.

- Oh hi. - What are you doing? Staring?

Yeah, I'm staring at these phone chargers.

Interesting.

They have a very good selection.

Thought the beef jerky was going to be over here.

Andrew's pretty cool, huh?

Oh my God, fuck you.

- What? - Shut up.

I'm just calling it like I see it.

I don't know what you're talking about,

because I'm not seeing anything.

I think you should go for it.

Oh my God, he's like my little sister.

I hate you.

You would come from a house like this.

What's that supposed to mean?

You come from a house like this.

I guess you're right. I don't know whether that's a compliment.

Mystery abounds here.

I would say your house is definitely foxy.

- Foxy? - Yeah, foxy.

I thought you said fucked.

I know, I was like, "Whoa."

Dude, I think this house is fucked.

Let's get out of here.

Check it out.

- Wow. - Woo.

Wait, so your dad designed the place?

- Yeah, yeah he did. - Holy shit.

It's exactly how I imagined.

Like I've been here before.

Come check this out.

Where are we all gonna sleep?

Yeah, yeah, so, yeah, I'm gonna sleep in my room,

there is my parent's room,

we have a guest room.

- Oh, me. - Me too.

What?

- We can... - What?

We can go in the same.

- You're not sleeping... - I thought...

Can I take your parent's room?

Keith, yes, you can take my parents room.

Then you guys can figure that out, later.

We will have a conversation about it.

There's the coach house, there's a bed in there.

Coach house? What's that?

It's just that. It's that... little house.

You call it a guest room, guest house.

Yeah, I don't know why we call it the coach house,

but we do. My mom uses it as an art studio sometimes.

- She says it's haunted. - What? Really?

Yeah, yes, she really did say that,

but nah, I don't think it's, I don't think, haunted.

But it might be?

I don't think, I don't think so.

I wanna stay there.

I do not want to stay there.

Okay, Ruth, Ruth signed up for coach house.

I'm Ruth and I love hauntings of all sorts.

Yes, yes, find me the ghouls.

Find me all of the spirits.

Ah, where shall my next spirit show its hideous head?

I shall go inside and pick through all the vents

until I find the most transparent spirit of them all!

- That's you! - Dead on.

That's my you.

But when you broke up with her, when you started to do it,

did you know when you started the conversation,

- did you know you were about to break up with her? - Yeah.

I've fallen into it before.

I figured you were about to break up with her, dude.

- Really? - Yeah. - Yeah. I don't know.

No offense, but you just didn't seem that into her.

Yeah, no, no.

She'd come over and you wouldn't really talk to each other.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was definitely, definitely...

And she'd just get super hammered.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- Will you be my shield? - Yeah.

So, how's things with you and Marjan?

What do you mean?

Just, how's things?

Yeah, they're just, I don't know, they're not,

there's no things.

Are you feeling good about that?

Yeah, yeah, I don't know.

It's weird, definitely weird.

Breakups are always weird, as you know.

Mm-hmm.

We've been talking a little bit actually,

which is good, I think.

Ideally, I would want to be able

to be friends with her at some point,

because I like her as a person.

But...

Do you think that's gonna be possible?

I have no idea.

I've been meaning to tell you too,

or to should just say that,

that if you,

if you ever feel like you

want, if you ever feel like you want to talk,

about Dean or anything,

that I would be happy to...

be there for you.

Thank you.

That's really nice.

Should we bring this chicken upstairs?

Yes, we should. That's a very good idea.

Our friends.

Our poor, our poor, starving friends.

They must be very hungry.

Remember the lady on the street in Budapest?

Yeah, I remember that.

Of course I remember that.

It's one of the weirdest things I feel like I've ever seen.

What?

- It's crazy. You've heard this right? - No.

What happened?

I don't even know if it's a story. It's an experience.

We were traveling around a bit, we ended up in Hungary,

and we had been out all night,

having a very nice time.

It was a very, very nice time.

A very nice time.

Y'all got laid, right?

I made out with this girl in this club,

and she bit my lip and it started bleeding,

- but it was so hot. - That's hot.

It's like I said, a nice evening.

So we come back to this place that we're staying at,

and I feel like you were trying to get into the place.

Yeah, which is why I didn't,

I didn't get a good look at her, but yeah.

So we were standing in the street, he's smoking a cigarette,

I look down the street and just see this,

I don't know, there's nobody else around,

it was probably six in the morning, but I don't know what time it was,

but this lady just starts walking at us,

and she's kind of moving with this certain,

there's just something to the clip of her walk that's...

It was like she was walking backwards

and someone was playing it forwards.

Yeah.

Then she gets close,

you start seeing that she's just talking

in this very intense, very angry tone,

to herself, but really it's not to herself.

You can tell what she's saying is meant to be directed at somebody else,

but it's not like, I'm mad at my husband and I'm complaining to him.

- It's something... - It was fucking terrifying.

I feel like I've seen a thousand crazy people

on the streets of New York or whatever, this was not that.

This was not someone who looks like

she's been doing this for years.

This is not somebody who's a crazy person. This is some...

She looked like whatever made her

lose her connection from reality,

it happened five seconds before we saw her.

- Did you talk to her? - No, no.

Just got out of the way.

I wanted to get inside.

I've never...

It was dread. I don't even know what dread means.

It was just like dread walked by.

I think I had my camera around my neck

and I tried to take a picture of her or something,

but I couldn't.

Oh my God, oh my God!

- Oh, it's hot! - Well it is a hot tub.

Shut up, fucker.

Have you guys ever done this before?

Cheers.

This thing where

I wanna go up to a...

person like a stranger,

and I ask them if we've ever met before,

and like come.

It's like I feel this pressure,

and I know it's because my father

instilled in me these values that are just...

- It's a really vulnerable... - I used to be fun.

...topic for me, man, I guess.

- I'm not fun anymore. - That's not true.

Pretty true.

I feel like my former rebellion

was to do nonprofit law instead of corporate law.

I fucking hate law.

I think it's actually something that I'm jealous of.

I really hate law.

I admire your ability too.

- No, really, it's just... - It's very nice.

You have this way of just, as soon as you meet people...

Safe.

They just instantly look at you like...

A safe place.

They just instantly know how special you are.

The safe one.

I feel like it's just not quite that way with me. People meet me and...

- That's not true. - No, it is true.

Right away, people don't quite look at me like that.

In the back of my head, I'm in a place like this,

and I think I don't deserve it or something.

I'm just thankful because we're friends.

I just remember my mom coming in all the time

when I was a kid and just saying...

Maybe because we're in the Hamptons.

"Your dad loves you. He's just having a really hard time."

I don't know.

I feel like I just spent my whole childhood

or my whole life making excuses for him and it wasn't until I was in college

that I really started to realize...

It's weird that you guys are friends.

That what he actually said was wrong,

and it was just like I had been just over and over making these really crazy,

whole moral...

Sorry, I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Yeah, no no no, I'm fine.

Yeah, I'm just not feeling that good.

I think I'm gonna go just lie down.

Ruth, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I interrupted your story.

- I was listening. - No no, it's fine.

Are you sure you don't, do you want me to...

No, I'm fine, I'm gonna go, I'm just gonna go.

You guys please keep hanging out.

This was awesome.

- I love you. - I love you.

- I love you. - Good night.

Thanks for the Hamptons.

Keith, can I try something?

Yeah.

Oh, oh.

Hey, Ruth, it's Dean.

I don't know totally what to say,

but I've been thinking about you,

and I was just wondering if you wanted to meet up.

It's totally cool if you're not really

in the right head-space for that.

I was just curious about how you been doing,

and was thinking...

Come out, fucker!

Come on, why don't you come out

and just hang out like a normal person?

Hello?

Hey.

Hey.

You dropped your drink.

Yeah.

Your beer.

Yeah.

Oh...

I'm Michael.

Okay.

Do you...

Do you want me to get a paper towel?

Sure.

We could use that to clean up the...

So what are...

Are you like...

...a real thing?

Yeah.

I'm...

I mean I'm...

I mean, you're not...

you're not a burglar?

Oh, no.

Okay.

I promise.

Okay.

Here, look, here.

Oh God!

I'm sorry, I don't mean to freak you out.

No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't...

So are you like a spirit?

I don't know.

Yeah, I guess.

Cool.

Yeah.

I mean, what's up?

- Sorry. - Why are you apologizing?

I don't know.

Yeah, like I guess I'm willing to try

to explain it to you, but honestly I'm not really sure

whether I'm open to criticism about it,

because it's such a subjective thing.

Oh. Yeah, no, I want you to feel really comfortable talking about it.

Thanks.

I appreciate you being such a good listener.

Basically, so,

if you think about life on earth as this, like...

endless cycle,

it perpetuates itself endlessly

in this food chain of consumption and reproduction

and regeneration across generations.

Inherently, I think I'm still a part of the cycle,

because it just...

knowing nothing, it just seems more reasonable

to assume that than that I'm...

Sorry, do you defecate?

Wow.

Good question.

- No. Not anymore. - Do you eat?

Not anymore.

I just think it's more reasonable to assume

that I'm a part of the thing

than that I exist outside of it.

Yeah.

But like,

do you see yourself as an aberration?

I think I'm still a being.

Do you know why I can see you?

I showed myself to you.

Yeah, but why me?

I don't know.

I guess because you wanted me to.

Do you have skin?

Yes.

But it's fucked up.

It's pretty...

it's pretty sensitive.

Do you wanna see?

Sure.

Okay.

You're gonna have to turn off the light for a second if that's okay.

Oh okay. That's fine.

Okay, I'm just gonna take this off.

Okay. I'm nervous.

Oh, really? I'm just gonna...

No.

Don't worry about me. I'm fine.

Okay. You sure?

- Yeah. - Okay.

So, yeah, this is what I look like now.

You don't look that weird.

Thanks.

I thought you were gonna be super fucked up looking.

Thanks.

You kinda look just like a normal dude.

Wow.

You're so sweet.

- I'm sorry. - I'm kidding.

I used to look more normal, you know?

But this is, uh...

hey, it's my face.

Check out my face.

And um...

you have powers?

- What do you mean? - Disappearing.

Oh.

Yeah, I can do that.

Can you walk through walls?

No.

What about other stuff?

I don't know.

- Is that a bummer? - No.

Cool, that's good.

Wow.

- What? - Sorry.

- What? - Nothing.

Oh.

Could I touch your face?

- You want to? - Yeah.

Okay.

It's been a long time since anyone's touched me.

Really?

That's sad.

- You taste good. - I do?

Ruth?

You okay?

Yeah. Sorry.

Super spaced out. I'm sorry.

Space.

I'm just really out of it today.

Me too.

Me three.

- Oh my God. - Oh shit.

I'm so sorry. Oh my God.

- Are you okay? - Oh my God.

Yeah, I'm gonna pull over.

Yeah, we should pull over.

Do you have any...

Yeah, in the glove box.

- I'm sorry, guys. - That's okay.

I'm so sorry, that came out of nowhere.

- No, don't apologize. - I'm sorry.

Hey.

- Hi. - You all right?

You guys, this is seriously the most embarrassing thing I've ever done.

- Did you get all cleaned up? - Yeah. I'm sorry.

Stop saying sorry.

Do you want to sit in the front?

That might be a good idea.

- Thank you guys. - Yeah.

I'm not ready to swear.

Hello?

About any of this.

- The plan has worked so far. - Hello?

- It's Thomas. - I promise you.

What are you drinking?

A swear? Can you drink a swear?

I can drink a swear. No, what are you talking about?

Why is that funny? It's hard to talk to you.

- Every time, I get so distracted. - Hello?

You're so beautiful, it's really difficult to...

Don't move your head like that.

Where did your napkin go?

Thanks for coming with me.

Yeah, of course.

Are you kidding?

Anyways, I have to tell you what's been going on.

What's been going on?

So Patrick got my number from the company directory,

which I guess is weird to do that,

but then he called me and then he asked me out on voice mail.

So now that's something I have to deal with,

by which I mean I need to call him today

or else I'm gonna see him tomorrow

and it's gonna be super fucking awkward.

I just have to do it.

I feel like my life is just one constant struggle

to like not be in embarrassing situations.

Hey.

Are you okay? You're acting super weird.

Oh... Yeah, I think I must have the flu or something.

- I'm feeling really weird. - Oh, poor baby.

You don't have a fever.

- I don't? - Uh-uh.

Hmm.

You don't have a fever.

I'm probably going to have to run some tests.

Okay. You don't know what I have?

Well, no,

Not yet, that's why I need to run some tests.

Tests.

Okay.

I'm going to need to take a blood sample.

Is that all right?

Do you have some blood to spare?

What?

I'm sorry.

I was trying to make a joke.

Oh.

But I'm going to need a blood sample though.

Yeah, that's okay.

Sometimes I make that joke and people laugh,

but you're...

a tough customer.

Have you ever considered going into stand-up comedy?

Now I know that you're joking, but I did consider it.

You could do it.

My mother would freak.

She'd understand because you have a passion.

- Did it hurt? - No.

I used to get allergy shots.

We're going to send your precious blood to the lab and they will analyze it.

Cool.

But my hypothesis is that you're suffering from a viral infection.

I think it'll go away within a few days if you get some rest and drink lots of fluids.

Okay, thank you.

Um...

Are we done?

Unless you want to see my stand-up performance?

Oh. Oh yeah, let's see it.

I'm not ready. I need to prepare some material.

You were bluffing.

I was bluffing. I'm not ready.

- Get some rest, Ruth. - Thanks a lot.

Have a good day.

Um... I have to tell you something.

How are you feeling?

Better.

Can I actually...

There's something that I wanna get off my chest.

Okay.

Okay.

I think I need to tell you that I like Andrew.

And I wasn't sure whether you did

or whether you picked up on that at all, um,

but, like, when I thought that you might be interested,

I sort of panicked,

and I didn't want this to be weird, so I am...

Mm-hmm.

Is this weird?

Uh... No.

Like... Thanks for telling me.

Um...

I...

Like...

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Um, yeah, I, I...

Yeah.

I think that's cool.

I really don't even...

I don't know if I even really want anything like that right now anyway.

I kinda got the sense that maybe he was interested in me.

Of course he is.

Oh! I feel better.

I didn't want that to be weird.

You been thinking about that a lot, huh?

Yeah, kind of.

I'm worried about you.

I'm fine. I'm just...

I probably should sleep for a while.

Okay. I should go.

- Let you sleep. - Thanks.

Okay.

- Bye. - Bye.

- Hey, what's your name? - What?

What's your name?

- Hey. - Hey. Thanks.

You feeling better?

I'm so sorry I puked in your car.

Don't worry about it.

My car is gross anyway.

I made it better.

Do you wanna have something to drink?

What?

Um... Yeah, I'll get myself a glass of...

- Hey. - Hey.

You seem thirsty.

Yeah, I'm thirsty.

- Check this out. - Oh, it's pretty.

Did you take these?

Yeah, when we were up in the Hamptons,

I found my old camera and took these pictures.

There's something super weird.

Yeah, in this one...

Look at this.

Remember how I told you

the coach house is haunted or whatever?

- Mm-hmm. - Look at that.

I have no idea what that is. Isn't that freaky?

It's crazy.

It looks like your reflection, but it's not.

- It doesn't line up. - It's crazy.

Did anything weird happen

when you were sleeping in there?

No.

I mean, I don't know, I was just sleeping. I don't know.

Hey...

You okay?

Sorry, I just...

I'm sorry. It's okay, you're fine.

Ruth, I'm afraid I need to ask you

some rather sensitive questions.

Um, okay. Yeah.

I was wondering if you could tell me if you're sexually active.

Right. Um...

Yes, I am.

And specifically, have you recently had

unprotected sexual contact with any new partner?

Well, I did recently have sex

with someone who was...

a stranger, a near stranger.

I see.

Ruth, I'm not a specialist.

I'm just a general practitioner.

Okay.

But it appears that you're suffering

from a sexually transmitted disease.

What is it?

Something very uncommon,

but I'm going to write you a prescription

for an antibiotic that may help.

What's the prognosis? What do you mean uncommon?

To be frank with you...

- We're not entirely certain. - Um...

Are you joking?

I'm not currently joking.

Okay.

I can't believe you're calling.

Hey.

Are you free to hang out?

You're just a huge liar, Ruth.

What?

Andrew told me what happened.

What happened?

I just wish you had as much respect for me as you do for yourself.

Wait. What?

I don't know what he said happened, but nothing happened.

Hey.

I need to talk to you.

Sorry, I'm busy.

Okay.

Bye.

Wait, Claudette.

Claudette?

I really, really, really need you.

Please, please, please, please.

Please come over, please.

Fine.

Okay. Thanks.

Oh, fuck!

Hi.

What the fuck is going on?

Can you turn out the light?

- I have to tell you something. - Yeah...

Um...

Something's happening to me.

Something...

- happened. - What happened?

I did something...

bad, and now...

my body's all fucked up.

What are you talking about?

It happened in the Hamptons,

at Andrew's house.

I... um...

I...

I met someone.

I kinda met someone.

Um...

I had sex with something.

What do you mean you had sex with something?

I had sex with something.

It wasn't human.

It wasn't a person.

What?

He said his name was Michael, but I don't know.

Ruth, you're scaring me.

He was just in there.

He was just there.

What?

Who's Michael?

Ruth, what are you talking about?

I wanted to.

Wanted to what?

Wanted to feel him inside of me.

I don't...

I don't know what you're talking about.

What the fuck? What the fuck?

What the fuck? What the fuck?

Fuck!

Hey, Ruth, it's me, it's Dean again.

Listen, call me back when you get a chance.

I just, uh, you know... I'm still thinking about you

and would really like to see you,

even if that's just a coffee kind of thing.

I'm sorry if you're still hurting

or whatever is going on with you.

I just would love to be on the same page.

Anyway, I'm thinking about you.

I would really like to see you, so call me back.

Okay, bye.

- Those are nice. - Thank you.

- Is that your new style? - Yeah.

No, I'm having some kind of a psoriasis thing.

You should really have someone check that out.

Okay.

It's pretty crazy to see you, huh?

Yeah, I don't want it to be.

I feel like we still have all this intimacy between us.

It's just we have to figure out what the new context is, right?

Mm-hmm.

How have you been?

I was a little bit surprised actually to get those voice mails.

Yeah, I think I pocket-dialed you the other night by accident.

I was looking at my phone

and I had an outgoing call to you.

I thought maybe, I don't know what I thought.

It made me wanna just say...

I know that...

we said...

But I just need...

I think that it's important to let you know

that I am seeing somebody.

It wasn't something that I was intending

to happen like that, but I, you know...

it did happen,

and I thought maybe you even would already know.

No.

I have not been...

secretive about it.

I've written about her on my blog a little bit.

Um...

Look, it's nice to see you. I really...

I miss you, you know.

- Yeah. - Not in a romantic way,

just in a... kinda...

- But... - I miss you too.

Yeah.

Are you going to Claudette's thing tonight?

Um...

Maybe.

Do you wanna go with me? Wouldn't it be funny if we showed up together?

I feel like it'd be...

- Funny? - Yeah.

If you had to choose one guy in this whole room

that you thought was the cutest guy,

which one do you think it would be?

- Um... - Would it be him or would it be me?

I guess it'd be Ryan.

That's hurtful.

- I totally fucked my test. - What?

- You all right? - Yeah, sorry to interrupt.

- This is Keith, he just fucked up his test. - Aw, hi, Keith.

- What's up, dude? - Hi, dude.

- Wanna do shots? - You know I'd love to.

There's no tequila, no tequila at this party.

We do. Give me a second.

- Hi. - Hey, what's up?

- Sorry to... - What's up?

Shit.

Hey, guys.

Hey, Ruth.

How are you doing?

- Hey. - What are you doing here?

I'm feeling better.

Maybe you should go.

What?

Hey, are you okay?

Guys, what's up?

How are you feeling?

What do you mean?

Yo, guys, what is going on here?

Keith, what's up, man?

Why is everyone acting so fucking weird?

Ruth, we...

we know about...

the thing.

What is the thing?

What are they talking about, Ruth?

Ruth?

What the fuck?

Stop treating me like I did something wrong!

I didn't do anything wrong!

Ruth, it's okay.

I didn't do anything wrong!

I didn't!

Didn't do anything wrong!

No!

Stop looking at me!

Um...

I'm very sick.

Very, very sick.

I don't know what's happening to my body.

I don't know what's going on.

I don't know what to do.

When we had sex, did you know I was going to get sick?

No.

I mean...

That was my first time.

I was kind of a virgin.

What does it feel like?

I guess it's a lot like anything else, right?

When I was alive or whatever,

I was hitchhiking around.

That's what I was doing.

I got picked up by this couple.

It was a man and a woman.

They took me back to the suburbs.

I don't think it was around here, but I don't know.

It's all confusing.

Then they gave me a drink and it was drugged.

Then they chased me around like some kind of sick game.

Then they caught me and they...

I don't know.

I just remember being suffocated.

And then I was here,

or I got here somehow.

I don't know. I have all these hazy memories of all of it,

but they're so vague and tenuous

that it really may have just been another life

or it may have been a dream.

I don't know.

It's all been fading out slowly.

I'm not even really sure what the deal is with all that.

There's just a lot that really isn't ever explained to you, and it just...

You deal with it.

You don't get the answers.

The answers never come.

I'm not even waiting for them anymore.

What are you doing?

I don't wanna sleep anymore.

Let me know if this is too tight.

I don't think she's gonna be here.

My mom....

used to spend a lot of time up there when I was a kid.

She always used to talk about it being haunted.

That's so funny.

Not funny, but...

my family treated it like it was a big joke.

It's pretty creepy to think that...

there actually was something there.

Ruth?

Hello?

Ruth?

Subtitles by explosiveskull