Original subtitles

What are you looking for, huh? A little toy surprise?

Who are you just, Tommy boy?

You take all the fun out of playing with weapons.

Money.

Open.

Grow up, kid.

If Don Franco wanted a stiff, you'd already be stiff.

Gonna spend it all abroad, huh, kid? And maybe you'll buy some flowers for

Mookie's wife.

And she's got to be tired of waking up next to this greasy slab of lasagna

morning.

Then I'll move in on your sister.

By the time somebody made her a woman, right?

Forget about the money. You won't be around to spend it.

Oh, I'll be around.

Federal officers, come up with your hands up.

That SOP sold us out.

FBI, drop your weapons.

Let's get the hell out of here.

Let me ask you something, sweetheart.

Did you ever see a dead rat?

Have you been peeking at my Christmas list, Grandpa?

Christmas came early this year.

I got you told.

Wow, cool, Grandpa.

Get out.

Nicky, what are you doing here?

I told you to stay away from her. She's my granddaughter.

Stay away.

You want me to stay away?

Yeah. Let me tell you something.

Don't you ever show your face around here again, you stinking cop, unless you

got a warrant.

It might be sooner than you think, Pop.

Let's go, Nicky.

I was just a girl working at a hot dog stand when a movie star asked me out on

date. I happened to save his life, and so in order to save Ace, he told

everybody that I'm a professional bodyguard.

Which, of course, I am not. Trust me. Then I was asked to be a figurehead at a

bodyguard agency, and they said I'd never have to use any weapons or be in

danger. And I always am.

Family album?

Oh, I always loved those old snapshots. Of course, now I have everything

uploaded onto my family website.

So if this and I want to hurl. No, it's a blast.

If I want to see my mom, I just call up famk colon backslash backslash mom dot

com. Class yearbook editor?

Three years running, including one year after I graduated.

John Franco?

Today's an anniversary.

Ten years since my dad and grandpa stopped speaking.

Oh, my God.

That is so sad.

Who shot the puppy?

Come on, Nick. We got to meet the new client.

I almost forgot.

Ronald Zane, multi -billionaire. Let's go.

So that's pretty much it, guys. I'm going to be in Paris for a couple nights

doing some work, but I had some staff changes here at the house, and I just

to make sure that Amelia is safe and sound.

Thank you, God, once again.

Hey, honey.

Say hello to the security team that I told you about.

Sure.

Miguel!

Yeah,

let me get that.

Excuse me.

Uh, don't worry, Mr. Zane. Amelia will be safe with us.

Excuse us one moment. Uh, staff meeting.

Miss Margate over there is the wife, okay? Amelia is 12 years old. The

billionaire's daughter.

Don't you read People magazine?

She's quite the trophy wife.

Comes with her own mantle.

You're totally desperado.

So, Mr. Z, when do we get to meet Amelia?

She'll be here any minute. By the way, I should really tell you this. Our faces

are pretty well known, so we rarely go to any public places.

Hi, Daddy. Hi, honey. How you doing?

Hey, say hello to VIP. They'll be looking after you while Susie and I are

Very nice meeting you.

You're not going to be gone long, are you, Daddy? Well, sweetheart, you know,

sometimes things happen and... Zane!

No. I don't like the numbers.

No.

Then withhold pay until he does it. Yeah.

Dad.

Really?

Bet you're going to miss your dad, huh?

I miss mine, too.

Tell you what.

Do you want to blow something up?

Yeah. Do you have any vinegar and baking soda?

Yeah. Cool.

Go. We're going to touch the baby food. Let's go.

You are... So cute. Yes, you are. I wish I had a floppy doggy just like you. Are

you trying to torture me?

Maybe. Well, it's just a matter of time.

Make you a fake bodyguard and get us a fake job.

Wait a second. You know what? Amelia really needs our protection, so that's

enough for me.

Hey, what's up?

What do you think?

Oh, it's a look.

Amelia, we are going to have so much fun. We can swap funky boy stories. We

pierce each other's ears.

And I can show you how to make a sock monkey.

Then we'll go to Chris' house and get our hair done and we can lose the whole,

um, 80s poison look.

Okay, first things first. What do they call you? Mimi, Amy, Millie? Ma 'am.

Now then, take it down a notch, blondie, and I'll tell you how it's gonna be.

I've spent too much time locked up in boarding schools.

But that's, you know, the next few days I want action. And plenty of it.

You can either come with me or you can look the other way.

But this baby's... Going over the wall.

Excuse me, I don't think so.

Well, then think again, Slim Jim.

You're such a party pooper.

We can take you somewhere.

Look it, you guys didn't even recognize her when you came here. Maybe we'll just

go somewhere with small crowds. You know, security will be a snap.

What do you have in mind?

We're going to the circus.

Uh, we're going to have to take a vote on that.

Yay, we win. Three to two. That's how we're going.

Okay, fine, we'll go.

But we recon first.

On it.

Right behind you.

Okay, I have a lunch date with Steve Duck, so we're going to go.

Okay,

well, let's see what you're made of.

Today, we are going to learn how to escape from a Ukrainian missile silo.

Put the doll down.

Like this.

Excellent. This is so much fun.

Can't be a bomb because I don't hear Rex barking.

Think on bananas.

There's some sort of magnetic interference.

And it's coming right from here.

Okay, freak shell.

You got two choices.

Drop the gun or lose your arm. Maybe three.

Lose your fist.

Arrest. Don't shoot.

I'm just a poor clown.

Yeah, you must be right.

Because I ain't laughing.

The gun is a harmless prop. See for yourself.

Styrofoam.

Sorry.

Cute toy.

Mind if I take a look?

Sorry, monsieur.

Circus magic can't be revealed.

Pardon.

Let's call in with the all clean.

Go ahead, I'll catch up.

Better see if Bozo's on the level.

I heard one of our guns.

Problem?

Nothing worth wasting real ammo on. The deal is still sweet.

Those mini railguns are going to make us 10 million bucks.

I'd say the small arm business is better than ever.

That's a million dollars for every year we've been buried.

I mean, who knew being dead pays so good, right?

You ever see a dead rat?

A clown's ammo is styrofoam, all right, coated with iron paint.

Makes it magnetic.

Something magnetic made Nicky's bomb sniffer go haywire, too.

There's only one weapon I know uses magnetic ammo. It's a railgun.

Come on, that's as long as the city block.

Not this one.

Okay, this is starting to hurt.

Hey, remember what I told you?

Roll the wrist, put your shoulder into it, then rotate.

Awesome. Thanks, Natasha.

Am I cool? You're the bomb. I can't wait to do more of this.

Hand the chit -chat.

You're not going to believe this.

I need to talk to Kay.

I'll be back.

Those odds are too human. Give me more snake.

Snake eye.

Coming up.

That's him, Tommy Whip.

And the other rep, Tina Scarlatti.

They were both in the circus, and they weren't pushing up daisies. Come on,

Nick. Last time you saw them, you were a kid.

And they were ten years younger, not to mention dead.

They faked their own death.

They had to have, or my grandfather would have... My grandfather.

What do I tell him? He's going to go thermo -nuke. Oh, these guys flip for

fed. They're the good guys.

They put the Francos in jail.

My family.

Did that include the blackmailing and hit squad wing of the family? Is it

lunchtime, Kay?

Yeah. Because the knuckle sandwich is on your menu.

Okay, all right, ladies.

Take it easy, Nick. Kay's got a point.

I mean, that is the family you ran away from.

Sorry.

Curtis, here we come.

What? Did someone throw a jink bomb or something?

The situation's come up. It could be dangerous and we need to reassess.

You don't mean about the circus, do you? I mean, we can still go, can't we, Aunt

Tasha? How can I put this delicately?

No.

It's the only French I know.

As for you, you don't need to be a weenie. And as for you, we can't break

Amelia's heart. It's for her own good.

Kong not happy.

She's probably going to start smoking again.

We're going to need some help.

Sounds like Tommy and Tino are still in the same business.

The legal arm.

They found the perfect cover.

Grandpa used to say they moved like acrobats.

You know, most illegal arms come through my old turf, Hong.

I'll take it out.

No offense, cowboy, but we got our own contacts.

Mine's faster.

Mine's bigger.

Where is he already?

Guy gets me up at 6 a .m. Yeah, but, Tom, you know, we got to rethink this.

You know, that babe with the 100 -yard stare?

She sure looked like Don Franco's grandkid.

Even if she was, how's she going to recognize us after 10 years?

We screwed the mob, faked out the feds. No way that Franco brat's going to stop

us, huh?

Mr. Harding.

Right on time.

Now spare me the charm and show me the toys.

Yeah, we got a sample right here.

What do you mean by a sample?

I ordered 200 of these things.

We arrive in your country on Tuesday. So do your guns.

Waved right through customs with the other circus crates.

All right, let's see.

Ten kilo pellet cartridge.

7 ,000 rounds per minute.

You might want to cup your coyote.

May I?

Nice, huh?

Lightweight, too, huh?

You won't see one dollar until I see the whole inventory.

Do you understand?

Fine.

We have a performance on Sunday.

Stop by.

We'll have a party.

It's worse than diet.

Too much Chinese food.

Good of you to help out like this, Rob.

Anything for a friend.

But the two guys you're looking for are dead.

Killed by the mob.

They've both been seen alive.

I was thinking maybe the witness protects them.

Well, not according to FBI computer.

Well, maybe your informant is a liar.

She doesn't lie.

Oh, see?

All right, man, I'll keep checking.

I'll go check out of the circus.

Thanks, Rob.

People actually watch this garbage?

Hey,

look who's here.

Nicoletta.

You don't come see me so long, I thought maybe you died or something.

Oh, I love this kid.

And who's this?

You don't think I'd come without backup, do you?

Hiya, cookie.

Pleased to meet you, Don Franco.

So, what's going on?

We need to talk.

Sure, sure.

Hey, Nick, did you ever watch this new show on cable, The Sopranos?

Oh, I love this show. It's so realistic.

Come on, guys, give me some room.

What self -respecting, wise guy would ever go to a shrink?

A Jungian, no less.

Not that I would ever know the difference.

So, Nicky, what's on your mind?

A funeral ten years ago.

Last time you and Pop were in the same room.

your father all the time.

He was my oldest son, Nick.

Stop. I forgot my lace hanky.

Be straight with me.

Tommy and Tino, do you have them killed?

What do you got to stop from television?

I don't have people killed.

Not unless they deserve it. And they didn't?

That was too lousy rat's face.

saved me the trouble. They blew themselves up.

Hey, what is it with you?

I tell you I didn't grease somebody and you get all disappointed.

Maybe I am.

At least when you kill people, they stay dead.

How you doing?

Val?

What are you guys doing here? What does it look like we're doing?

Thirty -six.

Thirty -seven.

Val? Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Nick, I was trying to figure out, you know, how those dead guys became alive

of a sudden.

Thirty -nine. Great.

Where is she?

Um, somewhere. Somewhere.

Nikki? It's about time you showed up.

Like you need help.

Fight over.

Val, do something.

Stop.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

We had it cool.

Cheering Chinooks. We were in the finals two years in a row.

Let's go work on our form.

What are you gonna do?

Huh?

You gonna kill me?

No, I'm just gonna let you go.

What makes you think so?

This gun.

The fact that we used to be on the same side.

Things aren't what they seem, Nicky.

Let's go.

Outside.

Let's go.

Same time.

You got this all wrong, Nick.

The feds disappeared us. Witness protection.

You would have never gone with it.

The FBI had us by the short hairs. Come on, Nick, let it go.

You forgave Don Franco.

For what?

You know for what.

I'm losing patience, Tommy.

Nick, you used to be so much smarter.

You know how much the Don hated cops?

When Pop joined the force, Grandpa did cut him off.

Cut him off?

He tried to kill him.

The Don put a hit out on his own son, on your father.

of the way, Joey. Put it down, pipsqueak. You put it down before I feed

you. You gonna feed it to me?

I'm gonna feed it to you. You got a problem with that?

What's going on here?

What's going on here?

I know you hated him, but if you tried to kill him... A gun with the killing.

What would I try to kill this time?

My father.

take the boys back in the house for a canoe.

Come on.

Let's take a walk.

This better be good.

When Nicholas... When he turned on us, I was angry.

Maybe too angry.

I told everyone that I no longer had a son.

So... Chaz and Mookie, they took it literally and they set up the hit.

Wait a minute. I found out about it. I stopped them.

They never had a chance.

Chaz and Mookie got busted when Tommy Whip set them up.

The feds stopped them, not you.

Nicoletta, my word.

Okay, boss.

Thought I told you to go get a cannoli.

Follow her.

Hi, Mr. Zane.

Yes, Amelia would like to talk to you, too.

Just as soon as she gets out of the pool.

You know how it is. She's swimming. She doesn't want to stop. It's just

swimming, so...

Where were you? You had me worried half out of my mind.

Are you all right?

No, yet.

Okay, talk to your father.

Hi, Daddy.

Oh, I'm having a great time.

Yeah, I almost got killed.

Yeah, and there are these bad guys at the circus who try to shoot us. Yeah,

I'm missing real live dancers.

On what?

Oh, okay.

Desi wants to talk to you.

Gee, thanks.

Yeah, I...

I mean, you don't believe what she was saying. It's just a little imagination.

thought I exaggerated.

Flabbermouth.

That's what's missing. You're right. Step into the house.

Eight major weapons heists in the last ten years.

Last one was in Hong Kong.

A shipment of ultra -hush -hush mini railguns.

Sounds familiar.

Ooh.

Here's something interesting.

In every city where a heist took place, there's... when the air just happened to

be playing.

I knew it.

Once a rat, always a rat.

No, they were never in witness protection.

As far as the FBI knows, they died in that explosion.

The only way anybody will believe us is if we catch them in the act.

Somebody's got to bring those slime balls down.

I'm with you, Nikki.

Whatever it takes.

Yeah, well, no way you're taking old Johnny here without me on your other

Someone's got to go to watch over you guys.

I'll tell Val.

All right, you've got to work fast.

That circus is outie tomorrow.

So are the railguns.

Unless we keep a closed eye on them.

Only one way to do that.

Yeah, they're over.

Tasha.

I got a 10 -20 on our wrath.

Keep out of sight until they make their deal.

Not even here.

And let's not forget, we're still protecting Amelia.

Quit whining. I barely nicked you.

All right, Tasha. I'll check in with Kay.

Amelia, it's Kay.

I know you'd rather be with Val or Tasha, but I can do fun stuff, too.

I've got Scattergories.

Amelia?

Hello?

Amelia?

Where are you hiding?

Are you outside?

Joey G, give me the doc.

Back up. Where at? Hey, that was Joey Garlick. Oh, Tom, what about our gun

The gun deal is history, and if the Franco's find us, so are we.

Oh,

this is not good. This is not good. Tom, what do we do? Come on.

Go, go, go.

Yo,

Tommy, we've got to find a way out of here.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe a hostage or something.

Children of all ages, you are about to see a show of unparalleled daring, feats

beyond the imagination, the sight, the sound, the spectacle of Cirque

Lumiere.

Ooh,

Tommy, Tommy. That's the girls with Nicky Franco.

I knew I'd seen her before. She was on the cover of some magazine.

That's the billion -dollar baby.

Dino. What?

I think we just found our way out of here.

Ladies and gentlemen, please direct your attention upwards for our new flying

duo. We call them Quick and Johnny.

Come on, man. It's about time.

Trust me, don't you?

What the hell is Amelia doing here?

Hey, kid.

Let's hear it for the Esperanza brothers.

Could that be a new Esperanza sister?

As they lift their way to the top of the tent for their magnificent, death

-defying high wire act.

Let me go!

Keep smiling, kid.

Let me go!

Hey, there's a new wire rack we didn't know about. Oh, we've got big trouble.

Hey, relax, relax.

Hey, smile.

Smile for everyone.

What do you mean she's gone?

Where'd she go?

I thought maybe she was with you. Oh, shoot. Okay, never mind. Never mind.

call you later. Bye.

your Swiss cheese.

I'll take care of her.

Yeah? How? Are you going to have me whacked?

Don't be stupid. You're my granddaughter.

Your pop was your son.

That didn't stop you. Basta.

Enough.

We will never, you hear me, never talk about this again.

I want you to read this letter sometime.

Me and my associates, we have some unfinished business to take care of.

All right?

I've done so!

What, are you going to shoot my grandkid?

No.

I'm surrounded by morons.

Well, it looks like the Esperanzas are in place and ready to go. Hey, do you

even know who my father is?

Indeed I do.

You like playing on the swing, kid?

Go.

Nice work, Val.

Let's not congratulate ourselves just yet.

I don't know, but if they hit us with that rail gun, it's goodbye VIP.

Well, come first.

Ready, y 'all.

It's a rail gun, Danny. Let's go.

Go, go, go.

Danny,

look at what you made me do. I made you do? Look at what you just made me do,

Tommy.

You are in big trouble.

Don't talk to Amelia that way. I think she learned her lesson, right?

I was talking to you.

Ronald Dane called.

He's going to be home in ten minutes.

Come on, we've got to go.

Go.

Why did I hire these VIP people?

They harm one hair on Amelia's head.

I'll have theirs.

Thanks, Miguel.

Amelia!

Lily, are you all right, honey?

She's fine. She's fine. She's been a doll. No trouble at all. What'd she say?

What? Oh, about the gangsters and stuff? Bad guys shooting at her and

everything? You know, well, she has quite the imagination.

It's a little out there. That's what I was trying to tell you on the phone.

Maybe if you guys spent a little more time together, you would know that.

Why, take it, Miss Irons.

Sweetheart.

Look, I'm sorry for being so busy all the time.

But you know something?

You know, when I got scared and I was worried about you, that you were in some

kind of danger, it really made me realize how much I miss spending time

you. But now, I promise, I'm going to spend all the time in the world with

This time, I really mean it. I swear.

Miss Irons, forgive me for misjudging you. And here, I hope to God that this

covers everything.

Thanks a million.

Thank you.

Wow. Well, you know, I included a little bonus.

Because you know what? You really are the best in the business.

Well, you know, we just go with the flow around here.

And it looks like the flow's over there, so I'm going to go get the jacuzzi.

I'm not sure I ever want you to leave me.

And, you know, in case I... Get the urge to practice our Tai Chi.

Exactly.

But I need to do this by myself.

Dear Pop, I know it wasn't easy being the first to break the silence between

but thanks.

And thanks for stopping Chaz and Wookie before they acted as stupid as they

look.

I know you weren't involved.

We got our differences, sure, but you're still my father.

And yeah, maybe one of these days we should have a talk.

You're right, Pop.

It's been too long.

Nick.