Original subtitles

Biohazard Battle Blast 5, Crunchy Returns, is the best game ever!

Okay, you can stop saying that now.

Carlos, don't blow up the ammo, I was saving that for later. Yeah, and I

the Platinum Controller! No! No!

No!

James, you betrayed me! You're slowing us down! Oh, I'm watching your back!

Yeah, and you're really bad at it.

Oh, yeah, well, if I got this...

Have you guys noticed we can't spend five minutes together lately without

fighting?

Well, I can't live like this anymore, so I'm...

Wait, where did you get the... I am so not going to miss any of you. Carlos,

out! James, out! Nobody is moving out. Now, we have been friends forever,

and we're perfectly capable of spending five minutes together without fighting,

right?

He's right. Fine, yeah.

I hate all of you! Do not!

If you count, play it straight.

Don't look back, don't hesitate.

When you go big time.

What you want, what you feel.

Never quit and make it real. When you go big time.

fee, a parking fee, and a fee fee for a total of $7 ,002 each.

I'm out of here, man!

Hey bidders, I'm finally taking that kayak tour around the world, so I

won't be needing you.

Have a Paul Woods time!

Fighting again?

It was a mild skirmish. I thought I told you guys to go outside and play.

Mom, we're not eight anymore.

And the new video game we bought is inside.

And we'll be fine.

How bad was it? They packed their suitcases and moved out.

They moved out? I don't know why we're fighting so much.

It's starting.

What's starting?

You're growing apart.

Our friendship wouldn't be the first to be destroyed by the intense pressures of

Hollywood. Well, you know what?

That's not going to happen to us. And you know why?

Because I have a plan.

You're going to get Gestapo to yell at them and make them move back?

And now I have a better plan. Thanks, Kate.

Look, the new album is called All Over Again. So I want this tour to be called

the All Over the World Tour.

Yeah, well, Germany won't call us back.

And Australia won't answer any of our emails.

Gustavo, we have a problem. I know.

We're booking our world tour and the world won't call us back.

Actually, no.

Me and the guys got in a huge fight and they moved out.

They moved out?

Yeah. So can you yell at them and get them to come back so we can be friends

again? Yes, because I do not need this band breaking up before our soon -to -be

world tour.

Plus, I love to yell!

Can you please not bike a banana peel?

Pick that up before you slip on it and throw your back out.

Oh, please, that only happens in cartoons.

My back!

Oh, this looks bad. I can't move!

Or yell!

Maybe it's not so bad. Oh, yes, it is. Because he needs to get to the palm

so he can fix us.

Kendall, you have to do it yourself.

You have to keep this band together.

And Kelly, call Doc Hollywood.

You know, I've never heard him whisper before.

I will destroy all of you. Oh, okay, okay, okay.

Kendall, so not nice to see you. Now get off my lawn, please. Thank you.

There is no lawn.

And what is this?

I always wanted a place by the water.

So peaceful and doesn't have any of my ex -friends.

Look, will you just come back to the crib and we can figure this out? Because

you can't live in a cabana your whole life.

No, but the cabana signing sheet goes up to two years and look at who's booked

it.

Me. Now get off my lawn.

There is no lawn.

And? I'm sorry that we were fighting, but what will it take to get you to come

back to the crib?

I want Carlos and James to apologize, too. Then I'll think about it.

Done.

Hey, do you happen to know where they are?

I don't care. But Carlos did say he always wanted a place overlooking the

you want.

I want you to move back into the crib and to not live in a box.

What are you talking about?

This box house is awesome.

I've got a lovely view of the park, my own bathroom, and a modern kitchen.

Cookies?

Okay, so your box house is cool, but so is the crib with a twirly slide and a

video game.

and best friends. And if you just apologize to Logan, we can all be best

again. No! Not until James apologizes to me for tossing my helmet cereal.

Yeah, well, that's a problem because nobody knows where James is.

you doing?

Retiring.

Retiring from the crib, the fight, and my former friends.

Whose place is this?

Does it matter?

It might.

Here's what matters. Moving out of the crib and into here was my best move

I clap and things happen.

And I don't need to share my hard candies.

With anyone.

And you have no friends here.

Wrong again.

Senior Alert, is everything okay?

Oh, yeah, everything's great, thank you. How are you today?

Oh, uh, I'm good, thanks.

Okay. Okay.

I don't know why we're fighting so much, but we have been friends forever.

And we have a maybe world tour coming up.

So would you please apologize to Carlos so that he can apologize to Logan? And

don't say you'll only do it if Logan apologizes to you first.

I said not to say that!

Why am I on this table?

Doc Hollywood said you have to lie flat on a hard surface.

Where is Doc Hollywood?

Shooting his reality series. But he said he's sending over the best in the

business. And that would be me.

Chantal, alternative healer and spiritual advisor to the stars.

No, no, no. No Robey Quacks.

That's what Johnny Depp said until I cured his halitosis with my palm.

Jeremy, I have to get up and get our almost world tour going.

70 % of all ailments are in the mind. So we must trick this mind into getting

him off this table.

Now we know it's not in his mind.

I miss him.

But at least I get the platinum controller.

You were too nice to them. Kenny's are my best friends.

You have to manipulate them.

Go on.

They want apologies, then give them apologies.

But they won't apologize.

And that's where manipulation comes in.

If Carlos is so sorry, why doesn't he come here and say so himself, huh?

You know, Carlos and his pride.

But he told me to tell you that he's making you a special lunch to show you

how sorry he is.

James wants to make me a special lunch?

Why doesn't he just tell me he's sorry?

Oh, you know, him and his pride.

What's he making me?

A nice, healthy salad.

Well...

Logan does know I prefer a light lunch.

And you know he's got a lot of pride. So I won't even mention the apology and

just enjoy the lunch he made you.

You know how much I love toast.

And has anyone noticed that it's been five minutes and we haven't fought?

Yeah.

You know, I don't even know why we fought in the first place. I know.

So let's all renew our friendship with a little biohazard battle blasting and

never fight again.

Oh!

I don't know why we're fighting so much.

You're growing apart.

Most adolescent friendships eventually decay due to distracting... I mean, last

week we were singing and getting ready for a might -be world tour, and now

not even talking.

Why don't you just be honest with them and tell them how much you miss them?

Uh, yeah. Guys, don't do that, Mom.

Oh, yeah, but the manipulation thing worked out well for you.

Yeah, why'd you do that?

Well... How am I supposed to get them all together to say anything?

With love.

Love fixes lots of things, okay?

You know what?

You're right. Because the one thing we all love is... Biohazard Battle Blast 5.

I'll create the ultimate Tournament of Champions challenge that they have to

come back to the crib for.

Or you could go outside and play.

No, my way's better.

What about Switzerland?

They like everything.

Not Big Time Rush.

Nor Finland or Norway.

I just need one international city to make it the all -over -the -world tour.

What you need is to free your mind from all its negativity and let the hot

healing stones of healing draw out the pain you're back for sure.

But the stones aren't even hot.

My bad.

This cure the Queen's eczema.

Bills. Bills.

Urgent plea from Rob Lowe.

You have what it takes to win the ultimate Biohazard Battle Blast 5

of Champions Challenge.

Where? The crib.

When? Three o 'clock.

Be there and win the ultimate prize.

I swore I'd never go back there or talk to them again.

Wait! This is an emergency!

I'm lonely!

Kelly Wainwright, BTR tour manager.

Yes!

What? We are playing Vancouver, Canada, which means BTR's

all -over -the -world tour is on!

Yes!

Technically, that's a North American tour. You need to play another continent

for a world tour.

And you need to fix him so he can move again.

My record is perfect.

But my positive vibes have never faced such negative blocks before.

Look, our album is called All Over Again. So do what you're doing all over

until he's fixed.

Then I will resort to more Western chiropractic methods.

I'll crack the vertebra, thereby creating a space to let... The good

and... Okay.

This guy's basically unhealable.

I'm going to be on my back forever with the world tour.

Wait. Perhaps if Chantel uses an unorthodox method to heal him.

What?

Actually, I'm the spiritual advisor to Sir Huge Concert Promoter in England.

I'm simply going to advise him to book a Big Time Rush concert in London.

Yes!

My back!

It's healed!

And as long as Kendall's healed the guy's friendship... Big Time Rush is

on a world tour!

305.

They're not coming.

Hey, first thing tomorrow, we're going to go to the mall and get you some new

friends.

Hey,

where's the prize?

Yeah, the flyer says we can win the ultimate prize. So where is it?

The prize is our friendship.

I hate that prize. Now I am walking out of here. Stay here.

Fine. Walk out on a lifetime of friendship because of one bad week.

I smell speech.

I hate that smell. I hate you.

Hey!

Carlos, who tutored you in math every night when you were struggling in

Logan. And Logan, who was there to protect you when you called the

team jerk in Latin?

Jane. But Gladiator is stupid.

Just think.

And James.

Who ran two miles to the nearest drugstore when you ran out of hair gel

sixth grade dance?

Carlos.

Here's your helmet back.

Here's your lucky comb.

Here's your laptop.

You know what? Just keep it.

You know, I still don't know why we've been fighting this whole time. But it

stops now.

Finally. So.

Who wants to play Biohazard Battle Blast 5?

They're fighting again.

I don't get it. We're just going to play a game.

It's the game.

The fighting started last week when we bought the game.

He might have a point.

Think about it.

Ah, look who's ranked higher than CarlyDose42 on the BH5 leaderboard.

Nice. Okay,

but

wait. What about my cereal helmet?

Well, I was sitting at the counter when I thought about how my cereal looked

like the surface of Rengar 7. And that reminded me how Carlos wouldn't share

of his Rengar power crystals in our earlier campaign.

So I took it out on his helmet.

Huh. Well, that makes sense.

Are you guys fighting again?

I swear, I am going to take that video game away from you.

Take it away.

Good.

So now maybe you will finally go outside and play. Mom, we're not eight.

because big -time rushes all over the world tour is a go.

Yes, with tour dates in the U .S., Canada, and London.

We're going to England. And we need to start rehearsal now.

Okay. Looks like we're playing outside.

I shouldn't let you go

I'm ready.