Original subtitles

Alright, here you go.

Hey man, what do you think you're doing?

You could have been killed.

Hey look, when I make my moves, just back off.

Well, how about some one -on -one, huh?

Hey Arthur, do me a favor, alright?

Get lost.

You've been following me around for the last few weeks. I don't want you

following me around, especially you straight -A students.

It's bad for my image.

Hey, Freddy, nothing could ever hurt your image.

Yeah, that is true.

I was born with suave.

Check it out, Arthur. Can you do this?

Hey, baby.

Uh -uh.

Can you? Can you do that?

Uh -uh. Uh -uh, right?

Arthur, do me a favor, all right?

Just stick to your homework.

And if you're a good boy, tomorrow I'll let you do mine.

Hey, yo, cats.

Yo, yo.

This is the greatest thing I ever thought of. This is the greatest word

Check it out, boys.

When he sees this, he's going to go nuts. And he should be here in about

seconds. Hold up.

Five, four, three, two, one.

This is an outrage.

An outrage, I tell you.

Hello.

Arthur, what are you doing here?

Well, I... All right, all right. Which one of you clowns is responsible?

Not me. I've never been responsible.

Okay, Mr. Woodman, what do we do now?

Someone stuck a sticker to my bumper.

Well, you know what they say, Mr. Woodman, it pays to advertise.

You should leave this on.

Who knows?

You may get lucky with a prune.

Laugh about it all you want, but I'm warning you, I'm getting to the bottom

this.

A stroke of genius, Mr. Washington.

You're going to embarrass me.

I just knew you did it. You were so bad.

You were so right.

Freddy, look, we ain't got much time here before class, so could you endorse

report card, please? Oh, no problem, Juan.

They don't call me Sweet Fingers Freddy for nothing.

Oh, and I'm over.

Thank you, Juan. I learned this one uptown.

A little behind -the -back job.

Copacetic, huh?

Hey, this is perfect. I can't read a letter.

Hey, Bo, don't you want Freddy to sign yours?

Arthur, a true gentleman never allows the wrong person to sign his report

That's why I always forge mine myself.

Adequate. But you'd like the boom -boom flare.

Hey, Freddy, next time will you sign mine?

Sure enough, little brother.

My grades this high give me a nosebleed.

There it is, y 'all. Come on, let's go face the music.

One, two, you know what to do.

Go, baby, go.

Uh -huh.

Go, baby, go. Yeah, uh -huh.

Arthur, Arthur, Arthur, Arthur, Arthur, Arthur.

Arthur, this is not your class. Your class is down the hall. You know where

Woodman keeps his good little boys?

Where everyone can read?

Welcome back.

Your dreams were your ticket out.

Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about.

Well, the names have all changed since you hung around.

But those dreams have remained and they've turned around.

Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Back here

where we need ya.

Welcome back.

Welcome back.

Welcome back.

I'm really disappointed in you.

You're a straight -A student.

Yeah, I'm kind of disappointed about all that straight -A stuff, too.

I used to be the one student I could always count on. If I needed someone to

organize an after -school activity, I'd call on Arthur. And who'd you call on

when you wanted some fun and laughs?

Fun and laughs?

Who needs that?

You call it fun what you did to Miss Hargrove today?

I mean, how could she possibly maintain peace and order in the library wearing a

bumper sticker saying librarians have big book ends?

Arthur, it was not funny.

But everybody laughed when a certain someone did it to you.

That's different.

I'm used to people laughing at my bumper.

Arthur, what's the matter with you? You were never in trouble before.

Now you're talking back to me. disrupting classes, your grades are

you're acting like a sweat hog.

Thanks for the talk, Mr. Woodman. Now I know I'm on the right track.

And in the words of my mean man... Bye there.

Arthur, one more thing before you go.

I don't want to see any more...

Bumper sticker.

Don't worry.

You won't.

It was saddening, y 'all. It was saddening. It was saddening.

Get my money.

Get my money.

I'm glad you're all still here. Hey, Mrs. Cotter, take a look at this, huh?

On the way to school today, Freddy got himself Xerox.

Yeah, I see.

It's a bad copy. Arthur, why don't you go to class?

Why should I be there, Mrs.

Cotter?

Well, for one thing, you could bring up your grade point average.

I'd rather stay here and bring it down.

Arthur, up your average.

for you guys, your report cards, Arnold.

Freddie, here's yours.

Juan, here's yours.

Oh, my God.

There's got to be some kind of mistake here.

I already handed in my report card.

Yes, I know.

And now you can take this home and have it signed by your real parents.

Those were the worst forgeries I have ever seen.

Sweet fingers.

You'll be getting yours later.

You see, your signature was so hysterical, they're still passing it

the teacher's lounge.

Freddie, speaking of forgeries, haven't you noticed that Arthur is trying to be

exactly like you?

What's wrong with being like me?

There's nothing wrong with it if you're you.

I am me.

Yes, but Arthur is not you.

And by trying to be you, he's abandoning what he could be.

Mrs. Carter, can we start over again? I'm lost.

Okay. The point is that Arthur idolizes you guys.

Especially you, Freddy.

Oh, what are you, Mrs. Cartier?

What's wrong with that? I mean, don't I deserve it?

Of course you do for some things, but I think that Arthur is looking up to you

for the wrong reasons.

Hey, Mrs. Cartier, if he's idolizing me, how wrong could his reasons be?

Freddie, don't you realize that you are his hero?

And being his hero, that means you have certain responsibilities towards him.

Yeah, I know. I gotta be the best me I can possibly be.

Which is pretty near perfect.

It's perfect for you, maybe, but I'm not so sure that it's perfect for Arthur.

Oh, Mrs. Cotty, what do you want me to tell him?

Don't love me?

I'm lovable.

I think you'd better settle for tall.

I think he's right. At least he'll give Arthur one good reason to look up to

you.

Oh, wow, Miss Cathy, that's cold, boy. That's rough.

I'm sorry, Freddy, but you're just not thinking.

Hey, Bongo.

I've been waiting to talk to you. What is it, kid?

I want to give you a token of my appreciation.

What for?

For all the things you taught me.

Oh, wow.

Hey, this is nice, man. I really appreciate this timepiece, Arthur.

I can't take this from you, man.

I want you to have it.

I want me to have it, too.

It's pretty hip.

No, I can't take this. It's too much, man. Yeah, don't worry.

Plenty more where that came from.

Oh, wow, Arthur.

I didn't know you had a whole watch collection.

Must cost you a fortune, huh? Check it out, man. The price tags are still on

them.

Hey, what's the matter, Boom Boom?

Would you rather have a digital?

Come here, Arthur. Sit down. I got to talk to you, man. Come on. Sit down.

Arthur, you know you can get time for this. You can get time for this.

You can't go around stealing, man. That's illegal.

I only did it because I wanted to be cool, like you in the game.

Arthur, how can you be cool, man, running around with a jacket full of hot

merchandise?

That's not cool, man. That's crazy.

Besides, we're not a gang, my man.

We're just a bunch of cats that's hanging out together because we enjoy

another.

Don't you like the watches?

Yeah, Arthur, I like the watches.

But I like them a whole lot more if they've been paid for.

Oh, don't feel like paying? Then here's what I'm saying.

If you get it for free, it's okay by me.

Catchy. But stupid.

Arthur, you got everything wrong. You got me all wrong. You got everything

wrong, man. Okay, check it out.

Yeah, I am bad.

But I'm not bad bad. You hear what I'm saying, man?

You think I'm coming through? I mean, I fool around and I have my kicks every

once in a while and sometimes I get in a little bit of trouble. Yeah, sure.

Yeah, but Arthur, I'm working with raw material.

I'm still developing my potential.

You got a head start on us, Arthur.

You're already smart.

I can change.

Arthur, why should you change?

I would love to get good grades.

They had to invent a whole new alphabet for the kind of grades I get.

Freddy, it's not so great getting straight A's.

Personally, I wouldn't know.

But that's not the point, Arthur.

Me and my buddies, we are what we are.

We do the best with what we got.

It just don't happen to be what you got.

Yeah, but you got fun.

Yeah, but you got brains.

Don't throw it away, man.

I have to get by.

I have to get by on good looks and personality.

It ain't easy.

I'm tired of studying and being the best at everything.

I want to be tough. I want to be mean. I want to have excitement, adventure.

You know, I want to have what you got.

Charisma. Oh, wow.

Hey, Arthur, my man. How you going to get by on Chalisma?

I don't even know what that means.

How about if I steal a car?

Then can I be like you?

No, Arthur. You can go to jail.

Oh, please.

I'll rob a bank.

I'll mug a mailman.

Harass a priest.

Arthur, that won't be necessary, all right?

I've just got to think about it for a while.

I'll get back to you, all right?

Now, what did you say this guy's name was? Well, the guy's name is Arthur,

Right here, right here.

Yeah, a little pain, man. He keeps following me around. I don't know what

with him. That's why he's a real weirdo. You're driving me crazy, man.

Mr. Saunders, I got your dinner here.

I'm not hungry.

Doctor's orders. You got to eat.

I got you chicken. You like chicken? I know you like chicken.

There you go. I don't know. you're talking about, Freddy. I used to have

try to copy me all the time.

I know, Vinny. That's why I came here for advice. Really? Oh, I

guess that's what you call a crash diet.

Don't worry about it, Mr. Sons. I cleaned it up. I got another one here.

bother.

He didn't eat much.

Oh, you should try that, man. It's delicious.

Guy's got a tongue as long as a frog or he's gonna starve to death, Benny.

I'm sorry, Mr. Simon.

I'll crack it.

It's broken. Would you prop him up? I'll hand it to you. Oh, no problem, man.

Want to play Airplane and the Hanging? Yeah. Here we go.

Open up the hanging.

Here comes the airplane.

They're good?

Oh, no.

Good.

Do you mind if we talk while you eat?

How big is this guy?

Oh, wow, he's a little guy, man.

He's about yay tall, man. A little guy? Yeah.

Here you go.

You know what else, man? He's trying to imitate me.

Sorry,

Mr. Saunders.

Look, I just cleaned this up.

Why didn't you tell me you didn't like chicken? I got roast beef.

Chicken, chicken, chicken, roast beef. Freddie, would you get that bottle tray

and give it to him?

Yeah.

I'm telling you, man.

I don't know what to do, man.

I know.

I just got the idea.

I'm going to get together with Epstein and Horshack, the rest of the guys, and

we're going to give that guy Arthur a real scare.

And after that, man, I bet we'd be rid of him forever, man.

What do you think of that?

No, you do.

You get together with the guys, and you give off their real scare. Get rid of

them forever.

Look, I gotta get out of here.

Hey,

Freddy, what do you think?

The latest in men's jewelry.

Oh, I know that I look meaner than usual.

This morning when I looked in the mirror, I gave myself all my money.

Arnold, Arnold, the idea is not to scare yourself.

The idea is to scare Arthur.

What's that for?

To hide behind. I don't want to get hurt.

Nobody wants to get hurt. And nobody is going to get hurt. We just want to make

Arthur think that someone is.

All right, come on. Check it out. Check it out.

When we get down to the real nitty -gritty, we're going to get Arthur so

man, he's going to run like a jackrabbit.

Yeah? Well, here comes Peter Cottontail now. Come on.

Hi.

Who's been getting on your case lately?

Hey, Arthur.

Who's been bumming you out lately?

Hey, Arthur.

Who's been cramping your style lately?

Excuse me, I'm sorry.

Hey, Arthur.

Who's been raining on your parade?

Mr. Woodman, Mr. Woodman, man. That cat, that cat's been coming down.

Gee, thanks.

Well, I mean, of course, if you can't do it.

I can do it. All right. He's going to be coming out here any minute. We want you

to stand right behind this door, right over here.

And we'll be right behind you. To back you up. Right.

Here you are, Arthur.

Today you are a man.

Here you are, Arthur.

Put some pressure on him.

I'm telling you, man, old Woody, old Woody is in for it now.

I mean, I'm going to take that guy. I'm going to take that dude and turn his

nose upside down that when he go out in the rain, he's going to drown.

But first, we have to have a little war council. You got the dog. OK.

Betty, I think your plan has backfired. Oh, okay, okay. Let me just think. Let

me think, all right? All right.

Okay, I got an idea. Hold on.

We just got to lay it on them thicker.

Thicker, huh? Yeah, let's get tough.

Tough. Let's get mean. Mean.

Let's get help.

Come on, Arnold. Tough. Tough. Tough.

Tough. Tough. Tough. Tough.

Tough.

Let's pulverize his body.

Let's galvanize his teeth.

Let's liquidate his nose.

Let's midasize his mufflers.

We got to tell him the truth. Now, that's a good idea.

But let's wait until he calms down, okay? Bye now.

I just blew it.

Oh, man, you don't got the guts to be like me.

If this is what you call guts, I'm glad I don't have it.

I'm taking those watches back to my father's shop, and then I'm gonna study

hard that I'll graduate early and get away from you and your friend.

Excuse me.

Does this mean you're not gonna tutor me in English?

I'm trying to get outside.

Have you tried using the door?

Isn't it a little early for Halloween?

No, it's never too early for a little trick or treat.

Especially the trick part.

What's going on here?

We just got Arthur back on the right track.

Yeah, yeah, we just let a poor little kid away from a life of crime and

restitution.

We really grossed him out.

You realize what you've done?

That boy idolized you.

Now he thinks you're filthy swine, scum of the earth, lowest of the low.

Thanks for setting him straight.

Well, guys, I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but that was a really

noble thing you did.

It was Freddy's idea.

Him?

I'm kind of glad we got rid of that kid anyway. He was just getting on my

nerves. Yeah, well, he thought you were great.

He thought you were cool.

No, Freddy, he thought right.

Yeah, well, you know, everybody knows there's only room for one boom -boom.

I'm a poet, and I know it, right?

So we're all better off, right, Miss Katia? Right, Freddy.

Especially Arthur.

Thanks.

Let me ask you something.

If Arthur hadn't defended me, you guys really weren't going to work me over,

were you?

Welcome back.

Your dreams were your ticket out.

Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about.

Well, the names have all changed since you hung around.

But those dreams have remained and they've turned around.

Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Back here

where we need ya. Back here where we need ya. We tease him a lot.

Cause we got him on the spot. Welcome back.

Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back.

Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back.

We always could find a friend.

Welcome back.

And I smile when I think how we must have been.

And I know what a scene you were learning in.

And it may come back again And what could ever lead ya What could ever

lead ya Out here where we need ya