Original subtitles

[upbeat electronic music]

* *

- * Go, go, go *

* *

[chill music]

* *

- No.

No, no, no, no.

[groaning] No.

- Damn, he comes and then he goes.

I was hoping you'd rail me one more time

with that big fucking cock of yours.

- [laughs softly] - Not that I'm calling it big

like in a stereotypical way.

- Look, this was a mistake.

I got very drunk,

and I guess I thought I could fill one hole

by filling another hole.

- Hey, be kind to yourself.

The amount of adversity you face.

You're just performing an act of self-care.

- Eating your ass isn't self-care.

It's rock bottom.

[door slams shut] - Damn, y'all.

Last night, best threesome I've had

since the "Queer Eye" boys came to Decadence.

- Oh, my God.

- I won't say which ones, but, uh,

let's just say I left well-dressed and well-fed.

Hey, lover.

- I take it back.

This, this is rock bottom.

[upbeat percussive music]

* *

* *

- You look like shit.

- I am way too hungover to be bitchy with you right now.

What do you want?

- I want you to tell me what you see.

- I see a nightmare.

I see a place that stole joy.

I can hear my friends screaming.

I can literally smell my flesh burning.

- Damn, baby. I was there too.

I get it, but damn.

Look, we all tangled up in this place.

Forever. It's in our DNA.

- So what?

- So buy it with me.

Help me restore it to its former glory.

- Wait, hold up.

I thought you already bought Babylon.

Didn't you invite me to a teardown party tonight?

- Technically, we will be trespassing.

- Oh. - All right, fuck it.

My credit is shit from years of living

in this redline racist-ass state,

so I need someone's white parents' generational wealth

to help a bitch out and cosign for me.

- Listen, I don't know.

I'm not sticking around much longer,

and Ghost Fag didn't exactly pan out.

- What we did with Ghost Fag,

we brought the community back together.

We can do it even bigger, Brodie.

For real.

I need this.

I think you do too.

[pensive music]

* *

[soft sentimental music]

* *

- Mingus.

Mingus.

Mingus!

What are you doing here?

Why are you not at school?

- You forgot to say goodbye this morning.

- Sorry, I wanted to let you sleep.

- Right. Um, no, I just--

I wanted to invite you to something.

- Ooh. A surprise?

Do I have to get dressed up?

- I mean, I guess you could if you wanted to.

But I--I'm...doing drag again.

- Honey. [laughs]

That's amazing.

- So I'm performing tonight,

and I thought maybe you'd like to come.

It's at Babylon.

I know this is last-minute, so it's, uh,

it's not a problem if you can't make it.

- [laughing] Are you kidding?

Wild horses couldn't stop me.

- [laughs]

Great. Cool.

Um, anyway, it's, like, really not a big deal,

so if you have to stay here and work, or, you know,

wild horses get involved-- - I'm gonna be there.

Of course.

I'll be there.

[laughs] - Okay.

[both laugh] - Now go to school.

- Yeah, for sure gonna do that.

Bye. Love you.

- Love you.

- You can't just take off.

I asked you to cover since Delphina's out.

- I just promised my kid.

- D-d-d.

Nose closes.

You got the count tonight.

- Mm-hmm.

[upbeat percussive music]

* *

[phone buzzes]

- Can I be mushy for a second?

- Mm-hmm.

- Yesterday, we played peekaboo and it's like--

[gasps] Babe, when are you gonna realize

object permanence exists?

[laughs]

And then Jett vommed on me,

and they had this satisfied little look

on their face that just brought me more joy than...

[chuckles] The point is...

[belt clicks]

It feels good to, like, finally be here

and be present.

[trills lips] - We should get married.

- Wait, what?

Shar, I wasn't, like, fishing for a proposal.

- I know, but I still think we should get married.

I mean it, Ruthie.

I don't even think I believe in the institution of marriage.

- Yeah, same. So basic.

- But I believe in us.

And I wanna make a casual promise

to be together forever

in front of our closest friends and family,

and I wanna eat oysters and get drunk

listening to terrible music like "Uptown Funk."

And I wanna wake up with a hangover

next to you, but not care

because I get to spend the rest of my life with you.

- Babe, I hate oysters. - [sighs]

- I'm kidding.

I mean, I'm not. Oysters are gross, but, like--

yes, fuck it. - Yeah?

- Let's get married. - Yeah? Okay.

- Yes.

- Mmm. - [laughs]

- [laughs]

I fucking love you.

- I love you so much.

- [exhales heavily]

[light music]

* *

[indistinct chatter]

- Do you know what this is?

Is she making everyone celebrate

her half-birthday again?

- No idea.

- Look,

we should probably talk about what happened the other night.

Shit went south fast, and you know,

you're being a little extra.

Look, I'm trying. - Are you?

Because all I'm hearing are excuses.

- Do you've something to say to me?

- Actually, I have nothing to say to you.

[Sylvester's "You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)"]

* *

[cheers and applause]

- Ah! [laughs]

Oh! Really glad you made it.

[clears throat]

Oh, thank you all for joining me here today

on such short notice.

[applause]

You have all been there to celebrate me

from my highest highs-- being the first woman nominated

to the Mid-Winter Cotillion Board of Governors--

and through my lowest lows--

being kicked off the Mid-Winter Cotillion Board of Governors--

for reasons I can't get into legally,

but I think we all know what they did.

- Mm-hmm. - Now.

I have invited you all here

today to both support and celebrate me

as I enter this next chapter of my life.

- Please don't say "Republican."

- After 33 years of marriage--

[laughs, sighs]

I made the incredibly difficult decision

to consciously uncouple from Winston.

[shocked murmurs]

- I filed this morning.

- Wow. - But this is not a sad ending.

This is a new beginning.

Julian, Brodie, oh, my babies.

Oh, for so many years,

I tortured myself over what I did to turn you both gay.

But now I realize,

you get it from your mama.

That's right.

[upbeat percussive music]

I'm gay now, everybody!

- * You make me feel * - Ooh!

[laughs]

Let's celebrate!

[applause]

- * You make me feel *

- Oh, my goodness.

- * Mighty real *

* Oh, you make me *

- Is it wrong to consider sending her

to conversion therapy?

- [laughs]

I'm still not talking to you.

- * You make me feel *

- I am... * Gay *

- Guess who got a new job today?

I mean, it's just one of those billboard law firms,

but still. - [laughs]

That's great, honey. Congratulations.

- How was lunch?

Was Brodie there? - Yeah, of course.

And in classic Brodie fashion,

he wouldn't admit to anything he did.

Oh, and my mom is divorcing my dad

and apparently gay now.

- Brenda's gay?

[laughs] I could see that actually.

What? I mean, she never struck me

as a Kinsey 1.

- I'm just-- I'm still mad at him.

I can't help it.

- Well, I'm personally grateful for Brodie

because if you hadn't left your bubble,

this wouldn't have happened.

[upbeat percussive music]

- I'm sorry, babe.

I just--I can't right now.

- [sighs]

- [retching]

[groans, vomits]

[coughs]

- Don't be embarrassed or whatever.

I had food poisoning once at my grandma's nursing home.

I ate pudding that I thought was rice pudding,

but there was actually no rice in it.

- Do you need anything?

- Does anybody have, like, crackers or something?

- I have one marshmallow-scented marker

and of course I do have weed.

- I could get you a Gatorade.

Gatorade is really good for food poisoning.

- Ugh. - I think maybe

just some space.

- Gatorade's my mom's go-to for everything.

Cold, flu, sprained ankle. - Really, Jake?

Does Gatorade cure HIV?

[apprehensive music]

I just-- I know you're trying to help.

You can't.

You can't.

* *

- I thought you said you were fine.

- Yeah, I'm--I'm fine. I'm on meds.

I just forgot to take them with food and...

I'll be fine.

What? I said I'll be fine.

I just need some fucking food, all right?

Can you stop looking at me like that?

- I'll be back.

[door thuds shut] - You wanna get high?

- Yeah.

I just--I can't with everyone looking at me differently

and judging.

Fuck.

Jake's never gonna talk to me again.

- People can surprise you.

Sometimes.

Have you told your mom?

- I've just--

I've put her through so much shit already this year.

* *

I don't know.

I don't know if I can do it.

I really don't. [door squeaks open]

- I couldn't remember if you liked spicy chips

or chips that weren't that spicy at all,

so I just bought these at the shift.

- [laughs]

- * Lyin' in the dark and we ride forever *

* Feeling so high going *

- Ooh. What do you think?

Zaddy in a top hat and tails

and Mommy in a dress made of tarot cards.

[baby coos] Yeah, too expected.

What in the Jussie Smollett?

Oh, my God.

[laughing] Oh.

Oh, this is too good.

- * Up to no good, doing what they wish they could *

[Daya's "Bad Girl"]

[upbeat electronic music]

* *

- We went over this in class.

Theological debates are not blasphemous.

And I know you mean well, trying to save my soul and all,

but for real, I'm good.

- Okay.

- Plus you're too late, sucker.

[phone buzzing]

Oh.

Hey.

- You're alive, which means sex with me didn't kill you.

Thank God. - Yeah.

I--I'm sorry I haven't had a chance

to respond to any of your messages,

but it's all just been a lot.

- Well, I get it.

Now the other night, well,

we don't have to talk about the other night.

I just... [sighs]

I have news. [laughs]

- What, you auditioned for "The Voice"

and Kelly Clarkson turned her chair around?

- [laughs] Well, thank you for acknowledging

that I'm a beautiful singer, but no.

Guess who just came out to all her friends and family.

- Brenda, you didn't.

- I did. [laughs]

You should've seen the look on Brodie's face.

I filed for divorce too.

Shar?

Are you there? - Brenda.

I--

the other night was a surprise,

like, a really, really good surprise,

but that can never happen again.

I mean, you know,

I want Flo and Jett to know you and love you

and, you know, for you to continue to be in my life

and in Ruthie's life 'cause you're fam, but...

that's as far as that can go.

[soft bittersweet music]

My future's with Ruthie.

* *

- Honey, there is no need for all this drama.

I completely get it.

We both needed a release, and boy, did we get it.

I have no regrets.

I am just grateful

that you helped me make this discovery about myself.

- Well, I am happy to be of service.

Well, look, I should run.

Uh, I'll call you later.

Set up a little playdate with you and the twins.

- I would love that.

- Cool. Talk soon.

- Looks like you got a case of the post-coming-out blues.

- Maybe I should--

maybe I should call off the divorce.

I just--well, I threaten to leave Winston once a year.

I mean, he wouldn't even bat an eyelash.

- Hey, no, no, no. Don't do that. Winston sucks.

He'd make me turn to lesbianism too.

- Uh-uh. That is not what's going on.

I met someone who made me question everything

I thought I knew about myself.

[lighter clicks] Someone who saw me

not as the person I am

but as the person I could be.

- Wow. Sounds nice.

Mom, are you dating a power lesbian

like Lena Waithe or somebody?

Because that is some advanced queer-level shit.

- You'll find love again, Brodie.

- I don't know.

Maybe I should just go.

- You've done that before. Has it ever worked?

Now, are all your friends gonna be at this little party?

- Yeah, whole gang should be there.

- Then I better get ready.

[upbeat percussive music]

I'm part of the gang now.

[phone buzzing]

* *

- [sighs]

[pensive music]

* *

[light buzzes]

- Boo, bitch! [laughs]

- The fuck is wrong with you?

Buss, if you was looking for ways

to set your money on fire,

I would've gladly taken it off your hands.

Why are you buying this dump?

- 'Cause it's the best bar in the city.

- It's literally a crime scene.

- I've got plans, Marvin.

And if you suck up to me and kiss enough ass,

then maybe I'll hire you as a bouncer.

[door clattering]

- Well, I don't kiss ass.

- Oh? - But I eat it pretty well.

- Oh. [laughs]

- Yeah, you do.

Hey.

How you been? - I was good

till about three seconds ago.

- Y'all got a real scorned lovers vibe going on over here.

We good? - We good, Buss.

- All right. You just let me know

if you need somebody to throw some hands.

I'ma be right over here.

* *

- Hey.

[sledgehammer clinks]

Don't you dare.

- Bitch, you just gonna leave me down here?

- No. I'm coming, I'm coming.

Ready?

All right, one, two, three.

* *

- [murmuring indistinctly]

Come on now, y'all. It's a party.

* *

[electricity crackles]

And the Lord said, "Let there be light, bitches!"

[subdued cheering]

Oh, y'all can do better than that.

[Moderat's "Bad Kingdom"]

[upbeat electronic music]

- What do you want, Ali?

- I was just missing you.

- Missin' me, nigga? You the one that dumped my ass.

Get out of here with that.

- I'll go.

- So that's it? You're just gonna go?

- You literally just told me to get the fuck outta here.

- Bitch, fight for me!

Damn.

I miss you too.

I just couldn't believe that somebody like you

could be into somebody like me.

- You're a dumb slut.

- You wanna see how much of a slut I can be?

- Yeah. I do.

[CLAVVS' "Dance in Place" (Treasure Fingers Remix)]

[upbeat dance music]

* *

- Well, this is depressing.

Brodie, I thought gay bars would be more chic.

No wonder you're so sad all the time.

The lighting in here is very unflattering.

- Yeah, Mom. That's why I have PTSD.

Bad lighting.

- Just keep going.

- I didn't even know you liked beer.

- It's the principle.

Oh, my God.

They're like best friends now?

* *

- * I quit the race *

* 'Cause I'd rather *

- I'm, uh, I'm gonna go feel the vibe.

- [laughs] Have fun. - I will.

- * I'm better changing pace as I go *

* I quit the race *

* *

* I quit the race *

- Okay, y'all.

I know this is Bussey's night,

but Shar and I-- get up here, Zaddy.

[laughs]

We're gonna have to hijack this party for a sec because...

we're getting married!

[cheers and applause]

- Yeah!

- Makin' it official!

[cheering]

- Let's get lit!

- * How 'bout the moon? *

* You see that shine *

* Just fly me close enough so I can make it mine *

* There is no distance *

- There's my partner in crime.

Come on, baby. Take a shot with me.

- Oop!

Mmm.

- You get the contracts I sent over?

- Oh, yeah. I did get it, Buss.

Uh, I was actually hoping to-- - Bussey!

I thought you was fucking crazy to bring us back here.

- [laughs]

- Crazy as all, isn't he?

- Girl, you did so good. - Yes, yes,

a bitch will gladly take it far as she so deserves.

- Yes, you do. - [laughs]

But one second, y'all.

Attention, everybody.

I would like to cheers to our boy.

I couldn't have done this without

Brodie's sexy-ass 850-point credit score.

[laughs] [crowd cheers]

We doing this together, y'all.

To Brodie.

[crowd cheering]

Hey, yo, DJ, make it bounce.

- * You already know! * [cheers and applause]

- * Stupid boy *

* I hate your guts, I hate your guts *

* Let's mess around, we'll make it rough *

- * Stupid, stupid, stupid boy *

* Get off my nuts, get off my nuts *

* You talk a big game, I'll call your bluff *

* You blab-a-blab-a-blabbing won't shut the fuck up *

* Stay brag-a-lag-a-lagging you acting too tough *

* Got a big dick habit, can't never get enough *

* Got you gag-gag-gagging when you choking on my stuff *

- * Stupid boy, I hate your guts *

- Whoo-hoo!

- Hey, Mom.

How's being a lesbian goin'?

Has Ellen reached out yet?

- Oh, I wish.

She seems so nice.

- [laughs]

Mom, I'm really happy for you.

You're, like, very brave.

- Yeah. Thanks, honey.

You know what would also be brave?

Apologizing to your brother.

- Me apologize to him?

- Sweetheart, you can't really believe

that your father and I adopted Brodie

because we wanted a child that wasn't disabled.

- He is such a little tattletale.

- Julian!

We adopted Brodie because I wanted another baby

and I wanted to give you a sibling,

but it was the '90s,

and I was addicted to diet pills,

so, you know, conceiving naturally,

that wasn't an option.

You're not angry.

You just feel guilty.

- * Is that all you got? *

* Is that all you got? *

* I'm buying the beach and the spotlights with it *

* Is that all you got? *

- Hi.

Did you lose someone in the, uh...

pew-pew?

- Oh, no, I'm just here to see my kid perform.

- Oh, thank God.

I was starting to think

that going through one of the five stages of grief

was a requirement for entry.

- Yeah. - [laughs]

- It's kind of in the dress code.

- Yeah. - Judy.

- Oh, Brenda.

[both laugh]

- Did you lose someone?

- Oh, no, no. Heavens, no, no.

My son, he only got shot.

- Oh, my God!

- Eh, he's fine now.

I mean, he's right over there moping at the bar.

- That's your son?

- Yeah, can't tell from this angle,

but he's very handsome.

- I'm sure he's a heartbreaker. [laughs]

Well, I'm gonna--

it was nice meeting you.

- Yeah, yeah! Till we meet again, huh?

I mean, hopefully somewhere that can make a decent martini.

- Yeah. [both laugh]

- Yeah. - Okay.

So grown-up. - Yeah, yeah.

Bye. - Bye.

- * Touch, touch, touch, touch *

* Touch, touch, touch *

* Been with me *

* Which way to go *

- Look, he'll come around.

Eventually.

- Hey, Noah.

Do you love him?

Don't answer that.

Just be good to my brother, okay?

- * Too much *

* I'm on my way to touch *

* My place, your money, we're rich *

* My fame, my heart on repeat *

* I need something better than love *

* I need that, I need touch *

* My place, your money, we're rich *

* I need that, I need touch *

* Touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, touch *

- Motherfuckers are looking mopey.

I need you to get some ass-shaking music on.

[heavy bass music playing] Oh, hell, no.

Uh-uh, do not-- - Hey, I--I did it.

I signed the papers.

- Ha! Yes, bitch!

We doing this.

- Actually, you're doing it. - [sighs]

- Look, I'm gonna dip outta New Orleans.

- God damn it, Brodie. The fuck?

Can you not be a messy bitch for, like, one second?

- It's the right thing to do, okay?

- Where you goin'?

- Manchester?

I think I should be with all the broody Morrissey gays.

Plus, you know I only speak English and Gay.

I mean, look, like, check out this guy.

I mean, come on-- - He a'ight for a white boy.

Personally, I think you being a dumbass bitch,

but know you'll be missed.

Hey!

Be careful with my Chicky.

- Yes, ma'am. [laughs]

- I'm too young to be a ma'am, though.

[laughs]

[music playing indistinctly]

* *

- If you're here for a quickie,

you're outta luck.

My makeup is flawless.

- No quickie.

I just wanted to say...

Break a leg.

- [laughs] What?

- You're performing, right?

It's about time you got back on that stage.

[soft sentimental music]

* *

- Brodie.

[breathes heavily, sniffs]

- Hey.

What's wrong? - Uh...

I need to finish getting ready.

* *

[pounding dance music playing]

* *

- Manchester?

Really?

- Getting married?

Really?

Congrats.

You and Shar are, like, forever.

- When you know, you know.

Congrats to you too.

Enjoy the cold weather, I guess.

- That's it?

- That's it.

[cheers and applause]

- Whoo!

- When I say "Babyl," you say "Lon."

Babyl! crowd: Lon!

- Babyl! crowd: Lon!

- When I say "Buss," you say "Sey."

Buss! crowd: Sey!

- Buss. crowd: Sey!

- When I say "Re," you say "Birth."

Re. crowd: Birth!

- Re. crowd: Birth!

- Hey, queerdos.

[crowd cheering] How y'all doing tonight?

Me too.

To be honest with you,

it's been hard to even walk on this side of the street

for the past six months,

let alone step inside.

But like my meemaw always say...

"It ain't worth it

if it don't terrify you."

So we gonna tear it down tonight.

[crowd cheers]

'Cause Babylon is coming back, bitches.

[all cheering]

Yeah? all: Yeah!

- Yeah? all: Yeah!

[cheers and applause]

And tonight,

we gonna pick up right where we left.

Ain't that right, Chicky?

[cheers and applause]

- You go, baby!

- * Fallen for a guy *

* Fell down from the sky *

* Halo round his head *

* Feathers in our bed *

* In our bed *

[Yeah Yeah Yeahs' "Sacrilege"]

* In our bed *

[cheers and applause]

* Fallen for a guy *

* Fell down from the sky *

* Halo round his head *

* Feathers in our bed *

* In our bed *

* *

* In our bed *

* *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* *

- Whoo!

- * Asked if I would try *

* To leave this all behind *

* Halo round his head *

* Dreaming in our bed *

* In our bed *

* *

* In our bed *

* *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* *

- Whoo!

* *

- * Whoa, oh, oh *

- Whoo!

- * And I plead *

* *

* And I pray *

* *

- * Whoa, oh, oh * - * And I plead *

* And I pray *

- * Whoa, oh *

- * And I plead * - * And I plead *

* And I pray * - * And I pray *

- * And I plead and I pray *

- * And I plead * - * And I plead *

[light buzzing]

- * And I pray * - * And I pray *

[crowd gasps]

- [panting]

[soft sentimental music]

* *

[laughs]

[both laugh]

[dramatic percussive music]

* *

[electricity crackles]

- * Whoa, oh *

[crowd cheering]

- And I pray *

* *

* And I pray *

* *

- * Whoa, oh, oh * - * And I plead *

* And I pray *

- Whoa, oh * - * And I plead *

- * And I plead and I pray *

- * And I pray * - * And I plead *

* And I pray * - * And I plead *

- * And I plead and I pray *

- * And I pray * - * And I plead *

* And I pray *

* And I plead and I pray *

* And I plead and I pray *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege * - * And I plead *

* And I pray * - * You say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege * - * And I plead *

- * Sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

* It's sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege, you say *

[soft pensive music]

* *

- Damn.

I thought your generation was supposed

to have less trauma than mine.

- Well, there is a trickle-down effect.

[laughs]

I didn't know you would be here tonight.

I would've warned you about the engagement.

I just-- - No, Shar, please.

You don't--you don't owe me anything.

I've known Ruthie half her life,

and she is your partner

and the mother of your children.

And I am happy for the two of you.

Seriously, congratulations.

- Yeah. Ruthie's really tryin'.

And for the first time it feels like our family has a chance.

- Shar, truly...

What happened the other night, that was a mistake.

- [sighs] - And, uh,

and we can put this behind us.

We are too mature to--

* *

- Mmm. [door clicks open]

[tense music]

* *

- Mm, thanks.

All right, um, is this enough?

- Yeah, that's fine. - Okay. Thank you.

- Y'all have a good night. - You too. Get home safe.

[light music]

[purrs]

[laughs]

[baby cries]

- [groans] - [sighs]

[laughs] Never a dull moment.

* *

- Hmm?

What's that? - Hmm?

- Is that like a new lip balm or something?

Hey, no.

It's delicious. [baby cries]

I got this.

[baby fussing, crying]

- [sighs]

* *

[door slams]

* *

- Hey, Mom.

- You were absolutely stunning tonight.

- Thank you so much for coming.

- I wouldn't have missed it for anything.

- [laughs]

- Wow.

Hmm.

- Are you gonna get in trouble at work?

- No, because I quit.

You are more important than this job.

You're my baby.

- Hmm.

- I--I am so proud of you, Mingus.

I just...

I'm so happy you are doing drag again

and that you found this amazing community.

You just...

you just really blow me away.

You're doing so much better. I was--

I was really, really-- [laughs]

I was worried that--

- Okay.

- Mm?

Huh? - I'm just...

Mom.

Uh...

I fucked up.

- Mingus.

- [stifles sob]

- Tell me.

- [crying]

- It's okay, honey.

- Okay. Um...

Don't freak out.

- Oh.

- [exhales heavily]

Um...

It's not the end of the world,

and I'm already on meds, so...

Mom, I, uh...

I have HIV.

I'm sorry.

I'm--I'm so sorry.

[crying]

- [laughs]

Ming-- [laughs]

I can't...

[laughing]

- What?

Mom. - I'm-- [laughs harder]

- What is--

are you having a stroke or--

- [laughs]

- Mom. - [clears throat]

I--Mingus. [laughs]

I thought you were gonna tell me you were dying.

[soft sentimental music]

- [cries] - Come here.

- Oh. - [sobbing]

- Honey.

We're gonna get through this.

You hear me?

- Okay.

- We're gonna get through it.

- I love you.

- I love you so much.

- Hmm.

- It's okay.

[somber piano music]

* *

- Sorry, can you turn this off?

- Mm, no, I love this song.

So angsty.

So where we going?

- Manchester. - [groans]

[in British accent] Canal Street is major, ya poof.

- Please don't do that. It's bad enough

I hallucinate talking to my dead best friend.

- Aw.

I'm still your best friend?

- Barely.

Do you realize how pissed I could be at you right now?

You should've told me about Noah.

- No, the truth would've hurt you, though.

- Or it would've set me free.

- So you're saying that even if the truth would've hurt you,

you still would've wanted to hear it anyway?

- Yes.

That's what you do when you love someone.

You tell 'em the truth.

- So then take your own advice,

you dumb faggot.

- You mean with Ruthie?

I can't tell her that.

- Yes, you can.

- No. It'll destroy everything.

- Why did you move back in the first place, Brodie?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

[tires screeching]

We're here, bitch.

* *

Don't be scared, Brodie.

It's the truth.

- Fuck off.

- Fuck you.

[Caveboy's "Find Me"]

[soft percussive music]

* *

- * What are you looking for? *

* Just a little hunter * [knock at door]

* Running through the dark *

* While I'm putting in the work *

* You know I give you more *

* Why you trying to start a war? *

* I'm right here if you need, pray on... *

- Brodie?

- * Does she make you feel like you don't want another? *

* Remember when... *

- I have to tell you something.

- Oh, God. What's wrong?

- * I don't know if we'll ever recover *

- You have this family, and it's beautiful.

And I've always wanted you to be happy.

You know that, right?

Like baseline, I just want you to be happy.

- I know.

- Look, and I know the two of us together,

can be a lot.

But I am never more myself than when I am with you.

And I know you feel the same.

- Brodie.

what's going on? You're scaring me.

- Maybe you're right.

Maybe our friendship is over.

But maybe...

Maybe we were never meant to be friends.

- I love you, Ruthie.

- I know. - No.

I want to be with you.

I'm in love with you.

Always have.

- * Find me *

* If you'd only go looking for something more *

* You can find me *

- What the fuck, Brodie?

You're really going to do this to me?

You're so fucking stupid.

- * You can find me *

* You can find me *

* If you'd only go looking for something more *

* You can find me *

* Find me *

[thunder booms]

* Find me *

* Find me *

* Does she make you feel like you don't want another? *

* Remember when we felt that in each other? *

* Now I don't know if we'll ever recover *

* We won't recover *

* Well, you can find me *

* You can find me *

* If you'd only go looking for something more *

* You can find me *

* I don't know, I don't know, I don't know *

* And I don't know if I'll ever recover *

* I won't recover *