All language subtitles for Ballard.1x03.Ognuno.Per.Se.ITA.ENG.AMZN.WEBRip.XviD-Pir8.en

[Ballard] Previously on Ballard…

Sarah Pearlman's killer left DNA behind
at another crime scene.

It's another murder too.
A woman named Laura Wilson.

-[Ballard] Any hunches?
-Harmon Harris.

Didn't have a motive for him,
but I didn't like his alibi.

The bullet from Yulia Kravetz's body was
indeed fired by the six-shooter you found.

-Any hits in the system?
-No. Nothing.

Not even on my John Doe?

Turns out that bullet from that case
was never even analyzed.

You sure?

I called in that bullet to be analyzed.

I'm telling you someone in the LAPD
let John Doe's murder go cold.

I do wonder if running cold cases
is proving to be a secondary trauma.

[Ava] It's a position you were
forced into precisely

because your brothers in blue
turned their backs on you.

-Have a good day, Renée.
-[Manny] Case closed.

She arrested the shooter.
You know he's a dead end.

Can't even string a sentence together.

Sure, I could have a little fun with that.

She won't know what hit her.

[inhales deeply, sighs]

Why ain't you at home sleeping
in your bed after that late night shift?

You give me heartburn just thinking
about you working at that club.

It's fine, Mama.

[Rolanda] So you just not gonna sleep now?

Errands to run.

Besides, he's sleeping enough
for the both of us.

[kisses] Love you, Paw Paw.

All former military,
curated to your needs.

But, hey, ask around.

You might find a cheaper package
at some other security company,

but nobody is gonna be better.

And let me ask you something, Craig.

W-When it comes to safety,
should money really be a factor?

Hmm? Uh-huh.

Amazing. Okay.

I'll have April in our office,
uh, send you paperwork by EOD.

Okay. We'll chat soon.

Bye. [chuckles]

How is it out there?

Oh, easy swells. Not much to catch though.

Perfect day to practice.

Thanks.

[barking]

-[dog whimpers]
-Hey, girl.

[sighs] Time for some bacon.

-[kisses]
-[indistinct laptop chatter]

Marti, I need ten bucks.

[sighs, stammers] Yeah, it's in my bag.

[chuckles]

-[Martina's mom speaking Spanish]
-[sighs]

[snores] Oh. Ralph, no. Oh, okay.

Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

-[grunts]
-Morning, sunshine.

-[groans]
-[chuckles, sniffles]

[sighs, grunts]

[Tutu] Surprise.

You used to love watching
your dad build his boards.

Now is not the time, Tutu.

Come on. Hobbies are healthy.

-Help me move it into the shed.
-No, really. I gotta get to work.

I got a meeting with the captain.

Okay, but there's plenty
of space in there,

-a-and the light's good--
-Tutu, send it back.

Any idea what that was about?

[Ballard] Waze says 34 minutes to PAB.

You could cut over sooner.

No. You know I like the coast.

[chuckles] What does the Captain
wanna talk to you about anyway?

I was kind of wondering that myself.

But I've been working.

I sent Parker to Property to pick up
that bullet from the John Doe case.

Probably before you got out of bed.

Probably. But I dug something up.

Hey, speak of the devil.
I got Berchem calling.

[Laffont]
All right. I'll hold. Rank before beauty.

[chuckles] Good morning, sir.

-You on your way?
-[Ballard] Uh, yeah.

I thought you said 9:00.

I did, but the Chief's riding me about
a cold case blowing up on social media.

I need you in my office now.

All right. I'm on my way downtown
as we speak.

[Berchem] Peachy.

Hey, sorry.

[Ballard]
You were saying you dug something up?

Yeah. On the suspect
in Laura Wilson's murder.

Harmon Harris.

The acting coach?

Yeah, Bosch said his alibi seemed off.
You get an address?

Forest Lawn. Heart attack two years ago.

That's what you meant
about digging something up?

[chuckles]

Can you ask Berchem when you see him
for a-a warrant to exhume?

Whoa. Don't you think
we're getting ahead of ourselves?

Look, if his DNA matches
the palm-print at Sarah's bedroom,

case closed and Jake Pearlman
will keep our little unit chugging.

And if it doesn't,
I've disturbed an innocent corpse.

Berchem's my only ally right now.
I can't afford to piss him off.

Mmm. Copy that.

[sighs] I'll try to track down the guy
who said he was with Harmon that night.

We may be able to make some hay there.

All right. I'll talk to you soon.

[scoffs] Dug something up. [chuckles]

[protestor]
This fraternity murdered my brother!

[protestors clamoring]

You're arresting me? You're arresting me?
They murdered my brother!

[Berchem] Raquel Thatcher.
Kid on the shirt is her brother, Nick.

He fell off a balcony
at his fraternity house back in '06.

Manner of death was undetermined.

-Not to her.
-Yeah.

She's certain some
of the members back then were involved.

Still had a warrant out
for the last time she did this.

So she gets arrested
and social media does the rest.

Exactly.

Local news did a segment this morning.

Of course that led to a bunch
of social justice warriors

jumping on the Chief about it.

So now it's our problem.

-And, sir, by our problem, you mean…
-Yours.

The original investigator died in 2020.

So gather your team.
I need all hands on deck for this.

A thorough review.
Make sure everything's crossed and dotted.

What do I do about Pearlman, sir?
He's all over me--

Put it on the back burner.
I'll deal with the Councilman.

You just focus on this.

Yes, sir.

[whirring]

You know, protein powder would flush
that Gen Z hangover of yours

way more than caffeine.

She's not hungover. She's exhausted.
She studies at night.

Oh, yeah? How do you know that?

'Cause we converse. You should try it.

-[Martina gasps] We have a rodent.
-[Colleen gasps] You saw the mouse?

Oh, you knew about this?

[stammers] It's a good omen.

-They carry diseases, Colleen.
-Oh. [scoffs]

A change in plan from Ballard.
Captain's got us working on a new case.

Something about a fraternity.

I'll grab the box.
We can start on the new board.

[Ted] Here, kitty, kitty.

She the victim from the motel?

Yulia.

I decided I want to find her parents.

They deserve to know what happened to her.

Solid. My mom freaks
when I don't pick up the phone.

[Raquel] My brother called me
in the middle of the night.

Sometimes so drunk he could barely talk.

Other times, I don't know.

He would try to hide it,
but I could tell that he was scared.

Scared of what?

The forced drinking, the dangerous stunts,
the physical violence.

He said it was out of control.

[sighs]

So, the original detective on the case.

-Did he--
-He didn't listen.

He chalked the whole thing up
to boys being boys.

And Nick's so-called brothers

stonewalled from day one to protect
each other. They're still doing it.

Nick didn't just fall off of that balcony.

Vic's BAC was .18.

That's on the low end
of alcohol poisoning,

but he was sloppy drunk.

Which fits the accident theory
more than murder.

Hmm. Seems like that's what
the original investigator thought.

Right. He was pulled
onto some gang killings

that hit the city at the same time.
No wonder it's a cold case.

And the only thing that jumps out in here

i-is there's an altercation
between Nick and a fellow pledge.

-Yeah, I see that. Kyle Barnett.
-Yeah, yeah.

They got into it
a few hours before Nick died.

Now, Kyle said the argument was about
girls, no big deal, didn't get physical.

But he's also the one who found the body

along with a couple other pledges,
so he might be worth a second look.

We need to get updated statements
from all of them.

So let's see who's attending the reunion.

-Already on it.
-[Ballard] Great.

Have you looked at this autopsy report?

Yeah. Everything seemed in line
with a fall from twenty feet.

[phone vibrating]

So, we have a fractured tibia, right side.

Two broken ribs, right side.

Abrasions right side.

Paints a pretty clear picture.

And a detached left retina.

Left?

You think something
happened before the fall?

[stammers] Could be.

Let's find these guys, see if they
have more to say after all this time.

[sighs]

Is that a new tie-shirt combo?

Yeah.

It's Leo.

[phone buzzes]

What's up?

Now?

Well, what's the problem?

I can't keep driving across town
because you don't have full access.

This unit is small enough.

-If you had your reserve badge--
-I know.

I had Jake Pearlman put you
at the head of the line.

I know. Okay?
All I need is my firearms qualification.

So get it.

Whatever suspicions you have
about John Doe and this bullet,

we have a better chance of
figuring it out once you're reinstated.

Okay.

Ladies, do we finally have a badge?

Yeah, you can release the bullet now.

Actually, I can't. It doesn't exist.

Check again.
I brought it from the morgue myself.

Yep. I saw that in the chain of custody.
But then the bullet was dispo'd.

-You can't be serious.
-That's what it says in the log.

Who the hell would do that?

-I want a copy of that dispo order.
-What am I, a magician?

-That was five years ago.
-I believe in you.

Give me some time.

I'll try to track it down.

You ready to admit I'm right now?

Outside.

Look, it's one thing to
let a John Doe go unsolved.

But they destroyed the damn evidence?

This is a cover-up.

We don't have solid proof of that.

I'm sorry. Did you not hear
what that man just said?

I heard what he said.

But right now we don't know that
that bullet wasn't dispo'd by accident.

Accident?

Ballard. Why can't you see
what's right in front of you?

Because I know the risk of making
accusations without airtight proof.

You wanna help me?

Get your goddamn badge.

Who would order a bullet to be
destroyed in an unsolved murder?

Sometimes mistakes are made.

That's a whopper.

Until we have more information,
we work the case other ways.

Or we could just shelve it.

It's got low solvability
written all over it.

And we wonder why cases go cold.

We're not shelving it, but right now

Berchem wants us
to focus on the fraternity case.

So where are we at?

Actually, I think we got lucky.

Kyle Barnett is in town for the reunion.

His Instagram's public
and there's a day-drinking thing

at a bougie golf resort in the Valley.

I could go for a spritzer.

[golf club thwacks]

Any updates on Harmon
Harris's alibi witness?

I thought we weren't working
the Pearlman case right now.

Well, you can't expect me
to forget about it.

And if I had to guess,
you probably haven't either.

His name is Adam Lennox.

His DMV address wasn't current,
but I found him on LinkedIn.

He works on-set catering.

Guess his acting career never took off,
but he didn't want to give up show biz.

Kind of like me ending up in cold cases.

Are you sure you're not…
[sighs] …overthinking this?

That comment about
Berchem being your only ally.

I mean, the Brotherhood
hasn't exactly showered me with,

uh, support in the last few months.

Cops can be assholes.

Doesn't make it personal.

Sure.

Asshole cops I can handle,

but they shouldn't have
booted me from Homicide, and they know it.

I rushed at Michigan. Didn't get in.

Probably for the best.

One way or the other,
I would've been in confession every day.

[chuckles]

Uh, there's our fella right there.

[chuckles, speaks indistinctly]

Yeah. Of course.

-[chuckles]
-Kyle Barnett?

I'm Detective Ballard. You got a minute?

Let me guess. This is about Nick?

We drew the short straw.
Need to follow up on the investigation.

I get it. And I feel for his sister,
but what happened was an accident.

All right. Well, this won't take long.

We just need to know what
you remember from that night.

We also need to talk to
another few witnesses.

Have you seen, uh,
Dan Gibson or Joey Lucas this weekend?

Yeah, that's Dan.

Joey's over there.
You want me to grab 'em for you?

Oh, I appreciate that,
but we'll just add 'em to our dance card.

[people chattering and laughing]

Joey, Dan and I had cleanup duty
the morning after the party.

We got to the house around 7:00.

And that's when we found him.

We, uh,
thought he was just passed out at first.

You guys had been drinking
the night before?

Probably a fair bet.

Any of it forced?

[Dan] Forced?

No, I mean, we were hazed, sure,
but it was fun, and Nick was all in.

And did you witness the fight he had
with Kyle earlier that night?

I was there, yeah.

I'd hardly call it a fight. [chuckles]

It was just a disagreement. It was stupid.

-It didn't get physical?
-[Kyle] Definitely not.

They just had too much to drink.

And you can't remember anyone who
may have held a grudge against Nick?

No, he had tons of friends.

He was chill.

Everyone liked the guy.

What makes you think someone had a grudge?

Well, one of his injuries
suggests that he may have been hit

in the head before he fell.

Oh. That's weird.

Um, no.

I-I wish I could help you more.

That's too bad. [clears throat]

Well, if you can
think of anything else, give us a call.

Okay. You got it.

They're hiding something.

Mm-hmm.

Who do we think would
be the first to fess up?

Well, Kyle and Dan are both lawyers.

Successful. Married with kids.

Joey Lucas is a manager at Kohl's.

[gasps] Ooh, I love that store.

They have good deals.

No kids.

Divorced a few years ago.

Less to lose than the other two.

He'd be my bet.

Okay, good. Let's start there.

Rawls, you were in a frat, right?

I was in a fraternity actually.

You wouldn't call your country a--

Okay, okay. We get it.

All right, Animal House.
You're coming with me.

I told you everything I remember.

-You sure?
-What?

I have nothing to hide.

You know, I was in a fraternity.

-[sighs] Oh, yeah?
-Yeah.

We pulled some dumb shit.

And I remember every time
one of us got in trouble,

the brotherhood always closed ranks.

Code of silence and all that.

But this isn't a stolen keg
or paying for a term paper.

Murder is a whole other ball game.

Whoa, whoa. Hold on a second.

You think your brothers
will close ranks for you now?

They have their big houses to protect
and their families, their firms.

Which is why they'll throw you
under the bus first chance they get.

But I didn't do anything.

You and your friends are hiding something.

[sighs] Look… [sighs]

I swear to God we thought Nick fell off
that balcony.

But y-yesterday when you were
talking about how you thought

he might've been hit in the head,
it made us think.

About what?

[stammers] There was this book.

We, um,
found it near Nick's body that morning.

And I told Dan to move it
before the cops showed up.

-Why?
-Well, we…

We just assumed, no harm, no foul,
he was looking through it when he fell.

And now you think it's possible
someone could've hit him with it?

[sighs] I-I don't know.

Maybe?

Still, why move it?

[sighs] There were some details in it.

[stammers] House secrets.

Stuff we didn't want the cops to see.

Look, it's not something I'm proud of.

[student 1] Yo, the cops are here.

Relax. We're just here for the book.

I don't know what you're talking about.
And don't you need, like, a warrant?

Listen, buddy.

You make her come back with a warrant,
she's gonna tear this place to pieces.

-Trust me.
-Can you just give me a sec?

Oh, yeah.

-We got nothing but time.
-[chuckles]

-[student 2] You guys seen my backpack?
-[student 3 yelling]

That the balcony?

Yeah.

Yeah. That'll do it.

It's this way.

[chuckling]

-You lived like this?
-Yeah. Jake and I.

We roomed together
for two years at Fullerton.

Just before Sarah died.

I didn't know that.

No one's added to them in years.

They're just, I don't know, house history,
but that's all.

[clears throat]
Who else knows about these?

Just brothers. They're a secret.

Not anymore.

It's like a twisted review system.

"Took it like a champ."

Wow.

Just when you think you've seen it all.

Colleen, Martina.

Once SID has them processed, I'm
gonna need you to go through all of these.

Log anything that seems
even remotely nonconsensual,

and we will turn it over
to West Bureau Sex Crimes.

Anything in there we can use for our case?

Actually, our victim made an entry.

Nick slept with Lucy Duncan
the day before he died.

They didn't bring her in?

The investigators didn't know
about the books before,

and they didn't interview
anyone outside of the fraternity.

So let's find her first thing, see
what she knows about Nick's scrapbooking.

[ominous music plays]

-[radio chatter]
-I saw you moved that box to the shed.

Thought I asked you to return it.

Thirteen letter word for ungrateful.

[sighs] Oh, that's right.

Granddaughter.

All right.
I'll just have a bonfire on the beach.

I'll get the marshmallows.

But before you do, look what I found.

His first build didn't make it
past the rail bands, but this one…

Tutu, I'm not building that board,
and I'm late for a meeting.

[sighs]

[dogs barking]

Hey, make it half-caf.
And get me one of those protein bars.

Yep.

[ominous music plays]

So we're at the end
of your mandated sessions.

But, Renée,
I do feel like there's more to talk about.

-[sighs]
-[chuckles]

It's hard being
the person no one wants to see.

Yeah.

I know the feeling. [chuckles]

But I think I'm in a good place now.

You can almost pull that off,
but I'm trained to know better.

Kind of funny, really,
that you're working in cold cases.

You've got a few to deal with yourself.

With your dad's death.

With Olivas.

Traumas you've put up on the shelf.

But there's a danger to
keeping all that hidden away.

[sighs]

Whenever you're ready to unpack, I'm here.

You get locked in last night?

Oh, my God. I fell asleep.

I've never seen a work walk of shame.

I'm sorry.

It's impossible to study at home.
I just needed someplace quiet.

It won't happen again.

How many more years of undergrad?

This is my last one.

Should be done already, but I had to
take a break to help my parents out.

I'll make sure you
have building access 24/7.

Couch is yours, any night till 9:00 a.m.

Wow, thanks.

-It's 9:20.
-Yeah.

Ballard.

Ah. So you are a magician after all.

Charlie Grant. Got it.

Can you, uh,
send me a copy of the dispo order?

We found Lucy Duncan, Nick Thatcher's
last known hookup, living in San Diego.

She's driving up here
first thing tomorrow.

Do we even have an interview room?

-Um…
-Can you fix that?

Parker.

Dispo order?

Who signed for it?

Guy named Charlie Grant.

That name doesn't ring any bells.

He wasn't on the John Doe case.

Do you have an address?
Let's go talk to him.

Well, I looked him up.

He worked Gangs
with Laffont back in the day.

So I'm gonna be roping him in.

Is that a good idea?

You said it yourself.

We were gonna play this close
until we have more intel.

Yes, I did, but Laffont was
my partner for seven years.

Best one I had.

Not only can we trust him, we need him.

Hey.

You were making a house call?

Is this a break in the Thatcher case?

No, but I'll fill you in
on the way there. [sighs]

Hey.

[smacks teeth] Welcome to the B-team, sis.

Uh-uh.

Could be nothing, you know?

Cover-up on a John Doe murder
seems like a reach.

Just because you came up with the guy

doesn't mean he's not
capable of going bad.

[scoffs] Charlie Grant was working Vice
at the time John Doe was killed.

He was nowhere near the case.

Then why is his name on the dispo order?

He'd have no reason
to want that bullet destroyed.

-It's hinky.
-Ah, yes.

The cornerstone
of the criminal justice system.

Innocent until proven hinky.

What gives, Tommy?

I hear you're on crypt duty
at the Ahmanson. [chuckles]

Can't enjoy retirement unless you take it.

-Yeah. Couldn't stay away.
-[chuckles] Yeah.

Actually, uh, Detective Ballard and I,
we're looking into a John Doe case

you were working about
a month before you hung it up.

Not me, bud. [laughs]

I was busy making
my Irish goodbyes every night

last four months on duty.

Captain let me burn my time.

No case work. [chuckles]

Vic was undocumented,
found executed in the foothills.

I worked Vice, honey.

What am I supposed to know
about some illegal getting whacked?

The bullet that killed him is missing from
Property, and you signed the dispo order.

What's she talking about, Tommy?

You know she has a habit
of making false accusations,

and she almost ruined a good man's career.

-[paper rustles]
-If you had nothing to do with it,

why is your signature on the dispo order?

That is not my signature.

[sighs]

Does that look the same to you?

Yeah.

Know your place.

Now get her the hell out of my house.

And, Tommy, watch your back.

A tiger doesn't change her stripes.

[engine cranks]

Forget about him.

You said you could handle asshole cops.

I can. As long as my partner has my back.

I don't need you to humor me, all right?

I need you to believe me.

If they forged some boozer's signature
to disappear a bullet,

that's a cover-up. Period.

Yeah.

We gotta hold this close.

People will do anything
to keep their secrets buried,

and when they've got a gun and a badge,
it's that much worse.

It's you, me, and Parker.

That's it.

But I gotta see where her head's at.

[sighs]

[engine cranks]

-And for the record, Renée…
-[engine starts]

…I will always have your back.

[phone buzzes]

[Paw Paw] Hey.

There's a day I remember.

[chuckles] Yeah.

Mama's car got towed during the ceremony.

[both laugh]

She was so mad.

No. That's not why I remember.

That's the day I knew I had someone
who'd understand what I'd gone through.

What if I don't understand?

Paw Paw, I wanna go back.

I do,

but it's rotten from the inside,

and I don't really know what to do.

I don't know what to do.

[worker] Order up for Ballard.

Thanks.

[dial tone plays]

It's Zamira, you know what to do.

-[beeps]
-Parker, trying to reach you.

Call me back. I need to talk.

Someone ducking your call?

Doesn't feel so good, does it?

You know, I figured I'd find you here.
Wing night.

What do you want, Ken?

Oh, come on, I don't even get a hello?

-Did you drive here?
-I had a few beers, okay?

Jesus.

Look, this is…

The…

The elevator the other day.

Those guys were out of line.

Yeah?

Did you stick up for me?

Oh, wait. You don't do that.

My God, Renée,
you're making this really hard, all right?

I'm just trying tell you that I'm…
I'm sorry.

What are you sorry for?

Olivas.

You know, and-and all that.

You're sorry he assaulted me,

or you sorry that you didn't believe me
when I told you what he did?

You were… You were my partner,
and I sh… should've had your back.

I wasn't just your partner,
I was your fucking friend!

You know what kills me about this?

You're not here for me,
you're here for you and your own guilt.

-No, I-I'm-- [stammers]
-You're an asshole!

I just want us to be okay, Renée.

-I just--
-No. No!

-Get off me!
-[grunts]

[panting]

Everything okay out here?

[groans]

Don't let him drive.

Call an Uber. I'm done.

[groans]

[grunts] Damn it.

[Tutu] Should I heat up your wings
for breakfast?

You didn't touch them last night,

and that hasn't happened
since Lola swallowed that squeaker.

You wanna talk about it?

No, I'm fine. Just busy.

Been hearing a lot of that
from you lately.

[sighs] You keep putting
these walls up around yourself.

You're the one missing the view.

Tutu, I just said goodbye to one shrink.

Ugh, it's not very inviting.

I think that's the point.

Suspect's furthest from the door.

Detectives between them and the exit.

-[Colleen] Gotcha.
-Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

We have a surveillance budget now?

Rawls brought his toys.

-[chuckles]
-Nice.

Lucy Duncan's ten minutes away.

All good!

You didn't return my calls.

I was busy.

I wanted to tell you that you were right.

Charlie Grant's signature was forged.

Glad you got the confirmation you needed.

Look… [clears throat] …I know I've
been on you about getting your badge,

but now I completely
understand your hesitation.

And whatever you decide to do,
I'll respect it.

[clears throat] Um…

Lucy Duncan's upstairs. You ready?

Yeah.

It wasn't really a relationship.
We just hooked up.

[Laffont] Um… [chuckles] Sorry.

I've been, uh,
bitten in the rear end by this before.

When you say hooked up, you mean…

We slept together.

Mmm.

Like, had sex.

[breathes deeply] I mean,
I wanna say maybe three times?

And the last time was…

The night before the party.

The night before he died.

You were at the party?

Well, all the Chi-O girls were there.

We always hung out with those guys.

Are you aware of a book they kept
of the girls that they slept with?

Oh, God. The body count book?

It's called the body count book?

Yeah, that's what they called it.

[sighs] And you knew about this?

Oh, they tried to keep it this big secret,

but we would hear them talking about it,
especially when they were drunk.

So I went looking for it
the night of that party.

Were you worried that you were in it?

Okay.

Present-day me recognizes that that
book is horrendous and men are trash,

but back then, I wasn't upset.

I know, it's crazy, but I was…

well, I was kind of curious
what he wrote about me.

And what did he say?

Oh, I was one of the lucky ones, I guess.

But then it was obvious
that Nick had a girlfriend.

I felt terrible
'cause she lived on my floor.

Meredith something.

If I had known… [stammers]

I mean, I was wild, but I was not a bitch.

And he was so awful about her in the book.

Calling her a… a… a stage five clinger.

Oh, and there was other stuff too.

Like what?

He wrote about her inexperience.

He called her a… a cold fish
and nicknamed her Sushi.

Will you find Meredith's page,
open it up for me?

Sure. It's just a few pages before mine.

It should be right here.

[Laffont] Have a seat
over there, Miss Haines.

[door closes]

Yeah, right there.

Um, I'm so sorry about the makeshift.

We're the cold case division.

Can I get you a cup of coffee, water,
or anything?

-[Meredith] No.
-Soda?

-[Meredith] What is this about?
-[Laffont] Um… I'm only a reserve officer…

Meredith?

[sighs] Gonna be a delicate one.

I think we might have a better shot
with her woman-to-woman.

Why don't you sit in for Laffont?

We weren't together long
but losing Nick derailed me a bit.

How so?

I'm alone.

Always just afraid, you know,
of getting close to someone.

Losing them.

Now I'm 39 and… [chuckles]

Do you remember anything
strange the night he died?

Just a regular party.

Drinking, dancing.

And you and Nick, you were solid?

Solid as any college
relationship, I guess.

Can we show you something
that we found in our investigation?

Mm-hmm.

You know, I've seen a lot of awful
things in this job, but this one…

this really made me sick.

What?

What is it? [chuckles]

Well, they called it the body count book.

Mmm.

Can you take a look?

Okay. I don't blame you.

Those photos. That language they use.

The callous disrespect
for every single woman in here.

-It's disgusting.
-Mmm.

And if I'm being honest,
it's probably the reason why Nick is dead.

You know, these guys, they…

they do the most unspeakable things
and there's no consequence.

Instead we carry it, right?

We shoulder all the pain,
we get called names,

we get our reputations ruined.

Meredith,
I know you had a page in this book.

And I know you tore it out.

-I… I didn't.
-[Ballard] I don't blame you.

After what he did,
after what he said about you in here.

I would've done the same thing.

In fact, I know I would've.

But I don't think you've dealt
with what it did to you.

I think that you packed it away,
in a really dark place.

And I think you've been stuck
on that balcony ever since.

When I saw that book…

saw what he said about me…

I loved him.

He was my first everything.

How could he hurt me so bad?

I was so stupid.

I thought…

I thought he would apologize.

But he just laughed

in my face.

Said I was crazy and desperate.

Maybe he was right.

And then he got mad
at me… [breathes shakily]

because I ripped that page out
of his precious book.

He said his friends would have his ass.

The brothers.

I was there crying in front of him
and he was thinking about the brothers.

[sighs]

I just wanted him to hurt
the way that he hurt me.

So I hit him.

You hit him with what?

That thing.

I hit him in the head

and I could tell that it hurt.

[cries] And then he
tried to grab it from me,

and I just had
this really weird quick thought that…

out of nowhere…

that if I just pushed while he pulled,
he would just fall.

What did you do?

I pushed. [breathing shakily]

[sobbing continues]

Oh, God.

Sometimes it doesn't even feel like a win.

The books will go to Sex Crimes.

Some of these women might get justice
if they choose to pursue.

What about Nick's sister?

She's meeting me here soon.

Gonna be a bitter pill finding out
her brother was no saint.

Yeah.

Well, she wasn't wrong
about the fraternity though.

All that toxic shit played a part,
just not in the way she thought.

Hey, Parker,

remember what I said to you
about your badge.

I want you to feel like
you're doing the right thing.

[Parker] I don't really know what to do.

I don't know what to do.

You know, I almost left in '91.

Rodney King. Everything got dark after.

Didn't know who you could trust.

The guy in the ride next to you,
he could've had it in him, you know?

Then the riots.

Our family suffered,
the whole city suffered.

Believe me,
I struggled to find a reason to stay.

Then why did you?

When you knew what
your so-called brothers were capable of?

Because once you know that,

you have a purpose.

Someone has to watch the watchmen.

[dog pants]

[chuckles]

Stay.

Good girl.

Stop judging, she's a growing girl.

Well, I'm not judging her.

Subtle.

Making Dad's favorite dinner?

I've wasted 25 years being subtle.

[sighs] You're stuck, Renée.

You have been for awhile.

And maybe that's on me.

I should've talked to you more about him.

We all have our reasons
for keeping things to ourselves.

[sighs]

Do you have that photo?

That board was a beauty.

[chuckles] Yeah.

He taught me how to ride on this one.

He taught you more than that.

I know.

I love you, Tutu.

Yeah, yeah.

[hopeful music plays]

[soft rock playing in bar]

You a cop?

Sorry, what?

Oh, my bad. Didn't realize you were…

No worries. Did you need something?

I don't know if my weak
pickup line was worth all this.

Well, now I wanna hear it.

[chuckles] Uh,
I just asked if you were a cop.

Oh.

No, just an intern.

But you should know, I-I don't date cops.

Oof, you wound me.

Well, maybe you don't date cops
'cause you haven't met me yet.

All right. Have a seat.