All language subtitles for Are You Being Served s08e08 Roots

Who's that?

Mr. Armand, who's that?

Mr. Rambo.

What in heaven's name is going on? The
store's due to open in ten minutes and

there's no electricity. Can you explain
this? I think I can. The management is

being very recalcitrant about paying us
togged up money.

Togging up money? Yes. As manual
workers, we have to put our overalls on

then take them off again. Now, this uses
time and we want paying for it. And

it's for that reason that the brothers
and I have therefore nicked all the

fuses. And darkness shall reign
throughout the whole of the land until

as our demands is met.

Oh, this is absolutely ridiculous.

Oh, no, it isn't. It takes us half an
hour to get out of our own smart clothes

and get into Grace Brothers' rotten,
dirty old overalls. I mean, we have to

here early and leave late.

And we're not getting paid for it. And
to make matters worse, you've just been

dismissed to night watchman. He was
asleep on one of the beds.

He was going to buy that bed. He was
giving it a slumber test.

Of course. Blimey, Liberace.

Peacock, where did you get that
candelabra? From Silverware, sir. I

signed for it.

Indeed I did, sir.

I also signed a claim form for the bump
I received on the head when I tripped

over a roller skate in the sports
department and went backside over elbow.

There's no need to be vulgar.

Backside over elbow is a precise
description of how I fell.

The Amaral Savora.

We had to pay 10p each for these
candles.

Yeah, and we still couldn't find the
ladies' room.

Why don't you pop down to Pet's? They're
doing a special offer on kitty litter.

Captain Peacock, are you going to stand
there and hear me insulted?

This seems as good a place as any.

Oh, that's better.

I had to kiss three girls in camping to
get this.

Well, there's only two girls in camp.

So I found out when I lit the lamp.

Mr Humphries.

Mr Humphries, are you advertising
something?

I hope not.

It was the fancy dress competition at
the all -night roller disco.

You know, I got right through to the
final and on the very last... last

the door opened and a boy walked in
wearing identical outfit.

So they asked us to shake hands and
share the first prize.

What was it? I never found out.

As soon as our fingers touched, he blew
a fuse.

Every bulb on his body went pop.

It turned out that he was AC and I was
DC.

How long have you been frightened of the
dark, my dear?

Ever since you blew all the

them out on purpose. When you adjusted
your suspender, I breathed a bit hard.

Well, couldn't we have just one on?

Oh, of course.

Oh, this candle's waving about a bit,
isn't it?

Oh, there we are.

Isn't it romantic?

I remember when it was all candles and
gaslight. You know, when I was a boy...

My first job was in a little gas -lit
Welsh mining town, and do you know what?

If you paid me tuppence a week, I'd come
round at five o 'clock in the morning

and knock you up.

By the time the sun was up, I'd done six
streets.

I bet you're always sure of a welcome in
the valley.

What were you doing in the dark, Mr
Grace?

Remembering what I did when I was a boy.

But I told you to... minutes ago to tell
you the lights were back on. I know. I

had the receiver to my deaf ear.

Anyway, I knew they'd surrender in
packing. I gave them an electric kettle,

if they turned the juice off, they'd
miss their tea break.

Well, it's time for me to take your
pulse now.

Do you mind getting off his knee? It may
give a false reading.

Oh, dear.

What's the matter?

It's very weak and very irregular.

Well, I had a bit of trouble getting
started this morning.

I had to put jump leads on me pacemaker.

You shouldn't live on your own, Mr.
Gray's. I keep telling you that.

What if something happened in the night?
I'd call the cab and come on over.

You're 90 in a few days' time. Yes, and
we all want to know what you'd like.

Well, for a start, I'd like a cake.

Not with 90 candles.

I know what you want. You want a girl to
jump out of it. Well, she'd have to.

I couldn't jump in.

Anyway, it's going to be a great day.
Every department is planning a surprise

for you.

Hey, have you got a surprise for me in
packing and maintenance?

We certainly have. Unless you cough up
the togging up money, we're going to

your carty with concrete.

Well, I don't think we should give him
anything for his birthday.

No, he didn't buy me anything for my
birthday.

Well, you weren't 90.

Don't you know my Mrs. Slocum, will you?

Is it possible for us to have a sensible
junior instead of that buffoon?

Well, I'm not chipping in any money, and
that's final.

Besides, I've spent more than enough
already on my wife's birthday present.

Did you buy her something nice?

Will be in a few years.

Stocks and shares?

No. A baby crocodile.

Well, you see, it eats well. In five
years, it'll be a handbag.

That is, of course, unless we decide to
go on for a suitcase.

Do you know, when I was little, I always
had a birthday party.

We used to play postman's knock.

Me and Mrs. Axel, we played postman's
knock on my birthday last year.

Aren't you both a little bit old for
postman's knock?

The postman didn't seem to think so.

I hope you don't think I'm intruding.

Only the conversation at the packing
department table has deteriorated to

football and page three of the sun.

What's the difference between sex and
page three of the sun?

Come home and meet the wife and I'll
show you.

Talking about page three of the sun, I
think I'll take these poached eggs back.

They need firming up a bit.

That boy's mind.

He thinks about nothing but sex.

His eyes are continually sliding down to
my legs in a sort of calculating way.

He's probably trying to work out how
strong they've got to be to keep up the

rest of the game.

Captain Peacock, will you distrain this
person?

I must remind you, Mr. Herman, that
you're at a table with senior sales

and lower middle management.

We would be obliged if you would conduct
yourself accordingly.

Yes, keep Mrs. Slocum's big knockers
out.

Would a menial like myself be permitted
to ask what...

senior sales and lower middle management
is doing for Mr Grace's birthday.

We are still debating.

I presume you're passing the hat round
in packing?

We've already done it. And what's more,
we've thought of a very original gift.

What did you get?

Here, guess.

Have a feel.

It feels like a giant polo mink.

Wrong.

One super executive heat -controlled
carzy comforter.

As used by the other end of the crowned
edge of Europe.

I've got a friend that's got one of
those, and the thermostat's got all

different settings.

You can have anything you like.

Hot, very hot, and send for the fire
brigade. I'm sticking her in the window.

Here, in half a minute, it'll be my
official tea break. I'd better get back

work. Why do you want to get back to
work when it's your tea break? Because,

brother, if I work during my tea break,
I'm on overtime.

You know, everybody's doing something
special for the birthday.

What are we going to do?

That nobody else is doing.

It'll make him very happy.

Well, in my experience, it's very
difficult to find something that costs

that nobody else does that makes you
happy.

Yeah, he's Welsh, isn't he? We could do
him something in Welsh.

That's a good idea.

Don't they have some sort of national
emblem?

Ooh, a leek.

It's nice. It'll go well with the cars,
you see.

There must be something we can get him
that would remind him of the hills and

valleys. Well, Mrs. Slocum could go in
his office and lie on the floor.

Take your coffee and go to another
table.

You can't tell me to do that. Only
Captain Peacock can tell me to do that.

Mr. Spooner, take your coffee and go to
another table.

But leave the sugar.

Now, wait a minute. Look, let's think.
What else is Wales famous for?

Coal. Rugby.

Skating.

I don't think Wales is famous for
skating.

Well, what do they do at Ice Tedford's
then?

It's Brahms.

They sing and read poetry.

A poem.

There was a young girl from Prestatyn
who said, look you, I couldn't get that

in.

She was packing her suitcase to go to
the nannery.

You'll be packing yours in a minute.

In my experience, the Welsh are always
very moved by the singing of a Welsh

song, such as Bread of Heaven or Sospen
Bar.

Well, couldn't we sing it at the party?

It wouldn't cost anything.

All agreed.

Just singing a song does seem a rather
mean sort of present. He'll have nothing

to take home with him. He'll have a
happy memory.

Probably a headache.

Well, I've been applying my mind to the
problem.

And I think I've come up with something
tangible that we can give him.

My brother has a lot of work for the
Royal College of Heralds.

I feel sure he could look up Mr. Grace's
ancestors and make us a shield.

Then while you sing the song, I can
present it. That could be very moving.

Only it costs money.

I can buy it as a display sample and put
it on Mr. Grace's account. He'll never

know.

So that's how you got your golf clubs.

No, that is not so.

They were a legitimate display item for
the garden furniture department.

They were damaged, reduced, and sold at
a special staff discount.

When the store was closed on a Sunday.

Some of us do have to work over the
weekend.

May we inquire what is going to happen
to that radiogram in our sock display?

Or do we take it that you'll be working
next weekend as well?

Oh, come, come, Captain Peacock. You're
a man of the world.

Yes, indeed.

Unfortunately, not your world, sir.

Suggesting that I'm on the fiddle?

No, but you could be tuning up.

We're getting right off the point, don't
you think?

Yes, but it's fun, isn't it?

Look, can we have a show of hands and an
all in favour for whatever it is we've

decided on?

Are you in a hurry, Mrs. Slocum? I
certainly am.

I've got a sculptor coming this evening.

He's going to do my pussy in clay.

Shove that down there, Warwick, will
you? Yeah.

All right, down there then, Mr Rumbold.

Oh, good.

Yes, that'll do splendidly.

Where is everybody?

You told them to go and change into the
costume for the Welsh song, and that's

what they're doing. Oh, I see.

I've got a complaint.

I've got a complaint. My costume's
defective.

Looks all right to me.

Well, it's not. I'm flashing.

We'll get that fixed. Where are the
others?

They're just coming, sir.

Mr Humphreys, why are you different from
the others?

Do you know, a lot of people ask that.

Apparently it was made for Mrs.
Thatcher, but when she got there, she

wanted to be treated like any ordinary
woman going down a mine.

And she was.

I want to know why I've got a red light
on my hat.

Well, that usually indicates that an old
working's collapsed.

I don't know why the ladies can't have
something a little more glamorous than

old boiler suit.

Oh, I don't know. You're an old boiler
and it suits you.

want my pick in your ear holes?

Personally speaking, I think it's very,
very hot in these outfits.

I quite agree.

Well, it depends what you wear under
them.

I know what the miners meant when they
said, one out, the lot out.

I can't say that's cooled me down at
all.

Put it all away, Miss Bronze.

You know, I had a friend who was a
ballet dancer who became a miner, but he

to give it up.

It's a tough life.

No, he was tough enough.

Just couldn't keep his seams straight.

Well, let's get on with the rehearsal,
shall we?

Yes, don't let's be later than
necessary.

Don't tell me that that sculptor's still
doing your pussy for posterity.

Yes, and it's at a very critical stage.

All last night, I had to keep it on the
kitchen table, covered by a wet flannel.

And tonight, at nine o 'clock... All the
neighbours are coming in to watch him

pour plaster of Paris all over it.

And then put it in a very hot oven.

Then what happens?

I'd rather not know. Let's get on with
the show.

Mr Harbour, would you be kind enough to
pass around the slong sheets if we'll

keep a welcome in the hillside? Over
here, ladies. Come along.

Where shall we stand?

Well, the little ones in front, the big
ones behind.

And the little ones with big beyonds in
the middle.

Thank you very much.

Have a good night.

Thank you.

Right.

One, two, three.

Mr. Grumball!

Yes, Miss Anderson? Will you be needing
us?

Do you mean? We've had time for a pit
-head bath while you've been doing all

that. When do we do our bit?

That was my introduction.

I composed it myself.

Very nice. Well, you can practice that
at home. Let's do our bit now.

We'll keep our welcome in the hillside.

We'll keep our welcome in the fair.

Rumble.

Rumble.

do we sing?

Weren't you singing then? I couldn't
hear you over all this.

You're not supposed to be singing at
all.

We're the ones what's got up as miners.

Why can't I sing as well?

Because you're not dressed for it.

Yes, I am.

If I were connected with the mine, it
would be in a managerial capacity.

I'd be dressed exactly as I am now with
a bowler hat.

Personally, I think it would be much
more moving if we sang unaccompanied. I

agree. Besides, you don't have organs
down coal mines.

My, Mr. Klein, we're welcoming them in
the hills and in the valleys.

Well, we're not dragging an organ up and
down there either.

We will sing it unaccompanied.

Very well, I'll conduct. We'll keep a
welcome in the hillside in B flat. One,

two, three.

We'll keep a welcome in the hillside.

We'll keep a welcome. That's awful.

Well, we don't know what note to start
on.

Precisely. You need the organ. And if I
don't play it, you can't sing the song.

That's not strictly true, Mr.

Rumbolter.

Hold your gun up, please.

I used to fill in at the Granada
tooting.

I used to rise 12 feet above the
audience.

And you've got vertigo so I had to jack
it in.

I see. Well, can you find a B -flat on
that?

Yes, certainly, sir. Would you like it
on the flute, the horn, the Hawaiian

guitar or the basso basso?

What on earth does that sound like?

I don't think that's the note any of us
want to hit.

I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll all
sing the first two lines.

Then, Mrs. Slocum, you're a contrato.
You take the land you knew will still be

singing. Then the men come in. You take
it solo, you see. Then the men come in

all together with this line of song,
We'll Keep a Welcome. Thank you, Mr.

Harlan.

One, two, three.

We'll keep a welcome in the hillside.

We'll keep a welcome in the maze. Mrs.
Slocum. Yes, I do know where...

Just a minute.

Can we have it a bit higher?

It does sound a bit low.

Try it in E -flat, Mr. Harmon.

This land you knew will still be... Mr.
Harmon! Mr. Harmon!

No vibrato, please.

Yes, again.

This land you knew will still be singing
when you come home.

Mr.

Brown, could we have it a bit lower,
please?

I don't think my truss is insured for
that note.

Try it in D -flat, Mr. Harmon. Right?

Yeah.

Mr. Rumbold, but this line will kiss
away each hour of here -ice.

What is here -ice?

Yes, if we're going to kiss it, we ought
to know what it is.

I thought you might ask that. It's the
Welsh word for longing.

Oh. Well, I've got a here -ice to go to
the ladies' room.

Well, look, if you could just hang on
for a few more minutes.

I think when we hit that last, that last
marvellous note, we ought to raise our

arms. It is sort of... triumphant
gesture of some sort. Mr. Harman, if

good at that sort of thing, show them.
Yes.

When you come home again to wave... Oh,
excellent, excellent.

That's what we'll do. Now, from the
kissing away bit, and do try to get more

feeling into that top note. Right? Thank
you, Mr. Harman.

Excuse me, sir, your brother's outside.

Oh, I expect he's brought the shield,
sir. This way, Mr Rumbaud. Mr Rumbaud

see Mr Rumbaud.

Will there be anything further, Mr
Rumbaud?

Will the Rumbauds be taking coffee? Sit
down, Mycroft.

I expect you've brought the shield.

As a matter of fact, there's been a
slight hitch.

We've traced the Grace family beyond
Wales.

There isn't anything beyond Wales, only
a lot of sea.

Genealogically speaking, they didn't
move to Wales until 1843.

Before then, they were in Scotland.

We would have discovered it sooner, only
as so frequently happens the name was

changed. But what were they called
before they were called Grace?

Grouse.

But we've rehearsed a Welsh musical
tribute.

I've prepared a Scottish shield. I can't
turn a thistle back into a leek.

Peacock. Could you arrange for your
department to stay behind after the

closes?

Yes, what?

There's a telegram for you.

Excuse me, ma 'am.

Oh, dear, it's for my brother.

They've traced the Grace family even
further back now. Oh, how much further

back?

Oh, well, here we go again.

We'll be right back.

brother.

It's not my birthday, it's yours, you
silly old fool.

So when are the departments losing
money?

Mr. Grace, you are probably wondering
why the staff of the first floor are not

present. It's because they've been
rehearsing and preparing a special

you. We have researched into the
earliest known records of your family.

been through the Welsh Graces, the
Scotch Grouses, and the Somerset

And we now think we have discovered the
true origins of your family.

Prepare then, Mr. Grace, to receive this
tribute to your roots.

Thank you so much.