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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,550 --> 00:00:35,550 Miss Redmond. 2 00:00:36,790 --> 00:00:37,790 Miss Redmond. 3 00:00:37,870 --> 00:00:40,010 She can't hear you. The old darling's deaf as a post. 4 00:00:40,390 --> 00:00:41,970 What's the problem? She's got gas. 5 00:00:42,590 --> 00:00:43,590 She's got what? 6 00:00:43,770 --> 00:00:45,110 No, I mean, I smell gas. 7 00:00:46,190 --> 00:00:47,810 Miss Redmond. 8 00:00:48,230 --> 00:00:51,510 Good Lord, you're right. Come on, Doris, darling. Wake up. Come on, Doris. Come 9 00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:53,130 on, dear. You left the gas on. Wake up. 10 00:00:53,470 --> 00:00:55,370 Last week it was the water, poor old darling. 11 00:00:56,330 --> 00:00:58,750 Miss Redmond, please open the door, would you? 12 00:00:59,770 --> 00:01:00,770 Hey, where are you going? 13 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:11,340 Now, if you want to go down to the street, I may need your help in a 14 00:01:54,730 --> 00:01:56,050 Come on to the breach, dear friend. 15 00:02:12,650 --> 00:02:14,410 Come on. 16 00:02:15,890 --> 00:02:17,850 You and I are going for a little ride. 17 00:02:18,290 --> 00:02:19,290 What are you doing? 18 00:02:21,070 --> 00:02:22,070 Oh, sorry. 19 00:02:22,150 --> 00:02:23,150 We've got to move. 20 00:02:42,779 --> 00:02:46,760 That was amazing. 21 00:02:47,860 --> 00:02:48,860 Pretty easy, really. 22 00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:50,700 You saved her life. 23 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:52,700 Yeah, it's going to be on all the news channels. 24 00:02:54,820 --> 00:02:56,020 Let's hope he doesn't end mine. 25 00:02:56,580 --> 00:03:03,200 What if you knew, beyond a doubt, what was going to happen tomorrow? 26 00:03:03,740 --> 00:03:04,820 What would you do? 27 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:09,640 There's no easy answer for a guy who gets tomorrow's news today. 28 00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:55,519 one out there. 29 00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:56,620 Forecast is freezing. 30 00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,520 90 % chance of more snow tonight. 31 00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:01,360 Oh, it's going to be a cold one. 32 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,260 Hero kill and hit moron. 33 00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:26,420 Now I get to save yesterday's Europe. 34 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:31,740 I'm out of here. Wait a minute. What about more pressing issues in the world? 35 00:04:31,820 --> 00:04:36,540 Like what? Like this painting and scraping, which you were supposed to 36 00:04:36,540 --> 00:04:37,540 with. 37 00:04:37,580 --> 00:04:41,640 Yeah, well, yesterday I had to stop a woman from blowing up. And now this guy 38 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:43,580 that helps me, he's here in the paper again. 39 00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:45,540 Don't you think that's kind of strange? 40 00:04:45,900 --> 00:04:46,619 Oh, yeah. 41 00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:48,800 Humanity first. Leave all the chores to fishermen. 42 00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:51,700 Look, I'll help you with the painting later. Right now I got to deal with 43 00:04:51,700 --> 00:04:53,080 Harbson. 44 00:04:54,670 --> 00:04:55,670 It's on time. 45 00:04:55,870 --> 00:04:56,870 Thanks, buddy. 46 00:05:00,110 --> 00:05:02,050 Gotcha, you little limey. 47 00:05:10,690 --> 00:05:11,890 Oh, hello. It's you. 48 00:05:12,510 --> 00:05:14,910 Yeah, I'm sorry, old man. I'm fresh out of heroics today. 49 00:05:15,170 --> 00:05:16,170 What are you doing? You moving? 50 00:05:16,470 --> 00:05:17,770 Very perceptive, aren't we? 51 00:05:18,270 --> 00:05:19,270 Oh, that's good. 52 00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:22,490 That's good. You should move. You should move on in life. That's very healthy. 53 00:05:22,670 --> 00:05:23,930 Matter of fact, you know what I think? 54 00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:25,920 I think that you should start moving right now. 55 00:05:26,380 --> 00:05:28,800 Are you daft? I'm waiting for a removal van. 56 00:05:29,260 --> 00:05:31,520 Yeah, but it's cold outside and you don't want to catch a cold. 57 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:32,920 Cold is cold. 58 00:05:33,620 --> 00:05:35,560 Try a Scottish grass mower at dawn. 59 00:05:54,570 --> 00:05:55,570 Go, baby. 60 00:05:56,330 --> 00:05:57,430 Oh, bloody hell. 61 00:06:00,270 --> 00:06:01,610 Come on, run, you idiot. 62 00:06:03,950 --> 00:06:10,130 I think 63 00:06:10,130 --> 00:06:12,890 this is what they call an extreme example of road rage. 64 00:06:47,460 --> 00:06:48,960 No. You don't mind if I do, eh? 65 00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:57,100 Well, I've indebted to you, Mr... Hobson, Gary Hobson. Well, tell me 66 00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:57,919 Mr. Hobson. 67 00:06:57,920 --> 00:07:01,560 How is it you always seem to manage to turn up at the moment decrees, as it 68 00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:02,560 were? 69 00:07:02,860 --> 00:07:04,300 Forget about that. Who was that guy? 70 00:07:04,660 --> 00:07:05,880 Never saw him before in my life. 71 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:07,680 Uh -huh. 72 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:10,980 Look, can I trust you, old man? 73 00:07:11,780 --> 00:07:14,680 Have you ever heard of the acronym MI6? 74 00:07:16,430 --> 00:07:17,930 Military intelligence, espionage. 75 00:07:18,430 --> 00:07:22,270 Obviously, I can't divulge any details. Suffice it to say that in my chosen line 76 00:07:22,270 --> 00:07:25,450 of work, I tend to make enemies along the way. 77 00:07:26,290 --> 00:07:27,290 You're a spy? 78 00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:30,590 Officially, I'm supposed to deny that. 79 00:07:32,450 --> 00:07:33,450 Unbelievable. 80 00:07:33,550 --> 00:07:34,690 It is, rather, isn't it? 81 00:07:35,930 --> 00:07:38,090 No, no, what I mean is I don't believe a word you just said. 82 00:07:39,030 --> 00:07:40,030 Oh. 83 00:07:40,510 --> 00:07:42,470 Perhaps that's just as well, but both are safe. 84 00:07:45,580 --> 00:07:46,580 So where are you going to go now? 85 00:07:46,740 --> 00:07:48,200 Oh, I'm going to follow procedure. 86 00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:50,640 Go to ground, disappear. 87 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:55,140 What about all your belongings? Oh, casualties of war. 88 00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:57,900 We rehearse for that sort of eventuality, Holmes. 89 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,780 On no account should you blame yourself for what happened. 90 00:08:01,140 --> 00:08:02,119 Blame myself? 91 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:05,420 Yes, for exposing me, blowing my cover, destroying months of Laborio's effort. 92 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:07,700 If you want to know, don't give it another thought. 93 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:09,040 Oh, I stopped. 94 00:08:11,860 --> 00:08:12,860 Blast. 95 00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:14,780 Don't mislead my wallet. 96 00:08:15,350 --> 00:08:16,350 Oh, well. 97 00:08:16,650 --> 00:08:17,650 C 'est la guerre. 98 00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:19,290 Hey, wait. 99 00:08:19,890 --> 00:08:21,210 You invited him here? Yep. 100 00:08:22,230 --> 00:08:23,950 He's staying with you? Yeah. 101 00:08:24,790 --> 00:08:27,590 Good. How many times have I told you, don't get involved? 102 00:08:27,970 --> 00:08:30,710 Look, you can catch him, but you can't cook him. Look, the guy doesn't have a 103 00:08:30,710 --> 00:08:32,970 job. He's out of money. He doesn't have anywhere to go. 104 00:08:33,429 --> 00:08:35,370 Look, people are trying to kill him, and I'm responsible. 105 00:08:35,650 --> 00:08:38,950 Oh, there you go again, putting the whole world on your shoulders. A tree 106 00:08:38,950 --> 00:08:42,150 cut down in the rainforest, and it's your fault. Do you even know who this 107 00:08:42,150 --> 00:08:45,870 is? You don't really believe he's a spy, do you? No, I don't believe he's a spy. 108 00:08:46,270 --> 00:08:49,370 I've seen the guy twice in the last two days. That's a little bit more of a 109 00:08:49,370 --> 00:08:50,370 coincidence, don't you think? 110 00:08:50,550 --> 00:08:53,050 Yeah, it's a coincidence, but, Gary, everything is a coincidence. 111 00:08:53,670 --> 00:08:54,670 Oh, hello. 112 00:08:54,950 --> 00:08:56,810 Wouldn't happen to have a washing machine handy, would you? 113 00:08:57,290 --> 00:08:58,590 Thank you. 114 00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:07,310 Gary, you... Oh, Clive Harbison, this is Chuck Fishman, the co 115 00:09:07,310 --> 00:09:08,610 -manager of the bar downstairs. 116 00:09:09,110 --> 00:09:10,069 Oh, delighted. 117 00:09:10,070 --> 00:09:11,650 Never met a bar manager I didn't like. 118 00:09:12,030 --> 00:09:14,230 On Her Majesty's secret service, huh? 119 00:09:14,790 --> 00:09:15,790 I beg your pardon? 120 00:09:16,450 --> 00:09:17,109 The Lord. 121 00:09:17,110 --> 00:09:18,330 He can be trusted. 122 00:09:20,890 --> 00:09:22,010 Keep it under your hat. 123 00:09:22,470 --> 00:09:23,470 Oh, absolutely. 124 00:09:23,790 --> 00:09:26,210 I think if you don't mind, I'll pop downstairs for a quick pick -me -up. 125 00:09:26,570 --> 00:09:27,570 Can I get you chaps anything? 126 00:09:27,910 --> 00:09:29,070 No, thank you. Oh, all right. 127 00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:33,490 Um, Mr. Haversham, how long do we have the honor of your presence? 128 00:09:33,750 --> 00:09:36,630 Oh, two weeks at the outside. Just a question of laying low till everything 129 00:09:36,630 --> 00:09:37,630 calms down. 130 00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:39,890 Now, don't worry. I have no intention of imposing. 131 00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:43,240 The on -hangers, please, and no starch. 132 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:46,200 Writer. 133 00:09:49,060 --> 00:09:50,920 You can rest easy, Mr. Phelps. 134 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,000 Your heart's going to do just fine. 135 00:09:53,940 --> 00:09:54,940 What do you mean? 136 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,700 The museum isn't interested in your painting. 137 00:09:58,660 --> 00:09:59,660 What? Why not? 138 00:09:59,820 --> 00:10:00,820 Because it's a fake. 139 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,700 Not a bad job, either, but... A fake? It can't be. 140 00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:09,780 One. The brushwork is too studied. This is a laborious copy. 141 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:14,660 Leicester painted in broad, vibrant strokes, especially in contrast to the 142 00:10:14,660 --> 00:10:18,140 Utrecht School, which was so popular at the time. Two, the canvas is of a 143 00:10:18,140 --> 00:10:23,060 manufacturer that wasn't available until the 1800s. Leicester died in 1660. And 144 00:10:23,060 --> 00:10:27,600 three, I happen to have seen the original of this painting. It hangs in a 145 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,860 private collection outside Paris. 146 00:10:34,030 --> 00:10:38,370 I know it may be small comfort, Mr. Phelps, but many educated collectors are 147 00:10:38,370 --> 00:10:41,290 taken in by forgeries. That's why the Guggenheim hired me. 148 00:10:41,690 --> 00:10:42,690 You're sure? 149 00:10:42,990 --> 00:10:43,990 Positive. 150 00:10:46,430 --> 00:10:50,210 If the painting gave your father pleasure, then it's done its job. 151 00:10:51,010 --> 00:10:52,570 I'm sorry to disappoint you. 152 00:10:53,930 --> 00:10:55,050 I'll see myself out. 153 00:11:10,079 --> 00:11:11,900 Show a little imagination. 154 00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:18,180 Imagination? You want red ceilings, peach walls, and white molding? It's a 155 00:11:18,180 --> 00:11:22,420 statement. A statement. Yeah, it makes a statement, all right. Get out of here 156 00:11:22,420 --> 00:11:24,380 fast. And what would you know about that? 157 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:26,320 It even sounds disgusting, Chuck. 158 00:11:26,900 --> 00:11:30,560 I must say, your beef, absolutely first class. 159 00:11:31,660 --> 00:11:32,900 No mad cows here. 160 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:34,960 Hello, what's all this? 161 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:38,400 Yeah, well, see, I am trying to redecorate, but I'm getting no help from 162 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,740 two Philistines. 163 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:41,640 What do you have in mind? 164 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:46,520 You know, something bold, something splashy. 165 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,920 Tell you what, why don't you let me have a stab at it? 166 00:11:50,400 --> 00:11:52,820 I mean, at least I can do under the certs. 167 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,040 You paint? 168 00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:56,920 I dabble. 169 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:59,720 Besides, I've never been one to trade on the kindness of strangers. 170 00:12:00,540 --> 00:12:03,900 Hey, some people sing for their suppers. Why don't you let me paint for mine? 171 00:12:11,680 --> 00:12:13,180 1204. 1204. 172 00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:20,320 Here we go. 173 00:12:32,430 --> 00:12:33,430 Princess of Mary. 174 00:12:38,270 --> 00:12:39,770 Long the coat, huh? 175 00:12:40,750 --> 00:12:41,750 Smart guy. 176 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:43,550 Very smart. 177 00:12:49,410 --> 00:12:51,990 And run, you cannot hide. 178 00:12:52,950 --> 00:12:55,750 Look, can't this wait? You'll want to see this, believe me. 179 00:12:56,690 --> 00:12:58,870 Guy was up all night painting. 180 00:12:59,150 --> 00:13:01,090 Listen, I've got things I've got to do for yourself. 181 00:13:11,939 --> 00:13:13,380 Voila. He did all that? 182 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,120 Some dabbler, huh? 183 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,240 Heard he'd honor talent. 184 00:13:21,560 --> 00:13:22,560 So you're an artist? 185 00:13:22,980 --> 00:13:26,800 Oh, no, no, I'm not an artist. No, my talent lies more in the realm of 186 00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:27,980 rather than creation. 187 00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:30,980 You know, you have a real gift. You can make a lot of money at this. 188 00:13:31,640 --> 00:13:35,040 The world of commerce had a different opinion, so I turned my talents in a 189 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:35,799 different direction. 190 00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:38,660 So what about the spy thing? 191 00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:44,960 Look, you've all been very kind. I was just trying to find some way of repaying 192 00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:48,740 you, that's all. Let's just leave it at that, shall we? And who was that guy 193 00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:50,380 yesterday, the one that tried to kill you? 194 00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:52,360 A business associate. 195 00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:58,100 Well, a former business associate. We had a bit of a falling out. 196 00:13:58,870 --> 00:14:01,870 Well, Gary and I have a falling out every day, but I don't try and run him 197 00:14:01,870 --> 00:14:02,870 with my car. 198 00:14:03,330 --> 00:14:06,210 Well, Marty's got rather a hot temper, but I wouldn't worry about him. 199 00:14:06,570 --> 00:14:09,070 I mean, his bark is a lot worse than his bite. 200 00:14:16,450 --> 00:14:17,470 Dead meat. 201 00:14:19,330 --> 00:14:22,590 One minute I got peach and white moldings, and the next I'm looking at 202 00:14:22,590 --> 00:14:23,590 Sistine Chapel. 203 00:14:23,710 --> 00:14:26,050 Got a hint to him. Man's got talent. 204 00:14:26,550 --> 00:14:28,290 Yeah, regular renaissance man. 205 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:32,339 Where the hell have you been? 206 00:14:32,340 --> 00:14:33,460 A chicken truck. 207 00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:36,920 What? Chicken truck? 208 00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:42,460 A school bus ran into a chicken truck, and the chicken truck, it's a long 209 00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:45,800 Where's Clark? 210 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:48,880 He's in the kitchen teaching Mario how to make crepe suzette. 211 00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:52,000 Crepe suzette? Yeah, they're really good. 212 00:14:52,260 --> 00:14:54,040 Turns out he's a gourmet cook, too. 213 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:57,780 You know, I think I might get used to this guy. Really? Gary Hobson. 214 00:14:58,380 --> 00:15:00,380 Heard about you in the paper the other day. 215 00:15:00,970 --> 00:15:01,970 Where is he? 216 00:15:02,290 --> 00:15:06,230 Who? You know who. Hey, Shorty, we're close. Why don't you get on out of here, 217 00:15:06,310 --> 00:15:07,370 huh? Really? 218 00:15:08,570 --> 00:15:10,670 Uh, come to think of it, now we're open. 219 00:15:11,170 --> 00:15:12,630 Do you like Crepe Suzette? 220 00:15:12,830 --> 00:15:14,790 No. Hey, what's going on, guys? 221 00:15:15,030 --> 00:15:19,890 Where is he? I don't know. I don't even really know who he is, even. 222 00:15:23,050 --> 00:15:28,270 All right. I know you're here, you limey piece of... 223 00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:41,300 Clive. 224 00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:42,500 Hi. 225 00:15:47,060 --> 00:15:50,260 You don't want to get between me and Clive, you got me? 226 00:15:50,740 --> 00:15:54,720 Because I can't be responsible for who gets caught in the crossfire. Could be 227 00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,140 you, could be him, it could be her. 228 00:15:57,620 --> 00:15:58,880 We understand each other? 229 00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:00,160 Now, wait a second. Good. 230 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:01,520 I'll be back. 231 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:05,880 Let me get him. That was Marty. 232 00:16:08,120 --> 00:16:09,440 Hey, if you just let me explain. 233 00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:11,120 I will, I swear. 234 00:16:16,860 --> 00:16:23,860 Let me 235 00:16:23,860 --> 00:16:24,860 go. 236 00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:26,340 Could we talk about this inside? 237 00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:32,700 I wish Crumb were here. 238 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:33,960 He'd know what to do. 239 00:16:34,300 --> 00:16:35,300 Well, can we contact him? 240 00:16:35,580 --> 00:16:39,880 No, you can't because Chrome is on a river in Montana, sleeping in tents. 241 00:16:40,620 --> 00:16:44,440 I went looking for Gary Hobson. The paper said he assisted you. 242 00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:46,300 Hello, 243 00:16:46,820 --> 00:16:51,800 Clive. Hi, Charles, Gary, Marissa. I have a friend to introduce. 244 00:16:52,060 --> 00:16:54,000 This lovely young thing. 245 00:16:57,540 --> 00:16:58,580 It's Faye Davis. 246 00:16:59,020 --> 00:17:02,760 I gotta hand it to you, Clive. You got a devoted bunch of friends. 247 00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:07,410 I am not his friend, nor am I a young thing. Listen to me, you patronizing, 248 00:17:07,430 --> 00:17:10,010 double -dealing floor flusher. You will finish what you started or I'll see you 249 00:17:10,010 --> 00:17:13,970 behind bars. I swear it. Faye. Don't Faye me. Faye? You've got till Friday. 250 00:17:14,130 --> 00:17:17,329 Faye. If that painting isn't back where it belongs, I will find you and 251 00:17:17,329 --> 00:17:20,030 personally nail your sorry hide to the wall. 252 00:17:22,190 --> 00:17:23,190 Nice meeting you. 253 00:17:26,589 --> 00:17:27,849 Lovely woman. 254 00:17:32,490 --> 00:17:33,630 Absolutely no sense of humor. 255 00:17:35,110 --> 00:17:36,110 You want to explain? 256 00:17:37,170 --> 00:17:40,790 Now, listen, Harbors... No, no, wait a second. Don't call me Harbors. Let me 257 00:17:40,790 --> 00:17:43,650 tell you something. The last two days, I've had a gun stuck in my nose I've 258 00:17:43,650 --> 00:17:47,390 shot at and almost ran over. So, now, why don't you try to explain right now? 259 00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:49,290 I suppose you're right. 260 00:17:49,490 --> 00:17:51,310 And the truth, Clive? 261 00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:53,690 The whole and nothing but. 262 00:17:54,410 --> 00:17:55,410 So help me God. 263 00:17:56,230 --> 00:17:57,930 Oh, Lord, where that woman can hit. 264 00:18:00,650 --> 00:18:01,650 We're waiting. 265 00:18:03,020 --> 00:18:07,760 Right, well, let me take you back to London. The swinging 60s. Home of 266 00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:09,920 young art student Clive Harlson. 267 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:15,880 Night in, night out, he would toil diligently in his Chelsea studio to hone 268 00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:18,600 craft, to summon forth art from the chaos. 269 00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:22,840 His paintings were received politely, but something was missing. 270 00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:26,740 All too quickly, he recognised his own limitations. No fresh ideas, no 271 00:18:26,740 --> 00:18:30,340 originality. His real gift was for mimicry. 272 00:18:30,940 --> 00:18:34,680 In copying the masters, it was as if the spirit of the artist entered into him. 273 00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:38,780 He could reproduce their works with uncanny accuracy and understanding. 274 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:44,360 Now, once that gift was recognized, our young hero's life took a somewhat 275 00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:45,620 unusual turn. 276 00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:50,660 Many a man's vices have been nothing worse than good qualities run wild. 277 00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:54,980 So it was with the brilliant new art thief who came to be known as the 278 00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:57,160 chameleon. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Let me get this straight. 279 00:18:57,660 --> 00:18:59,200 You steal a famous painting. 280 00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:02,900 You replace it with a copy, and no one ever found out? 281 00:19:03,260 --> 00:19:06,860 Well, in some cases, the curators know, but they're too embarrassed to admit 282 00:19:06,860 --> 00:19:08,040 they've got a forgery on their walls. 283 00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:09,960 So, how'd you get mixed up with Marty? 284 00:19:10,660 --> 00:19:15,540 Marty, yes. Well, despite his boorish manners, Marty Jarmusch was plugged into 285 00:19:15,540 --> 00:19:19,960 certain strata of modern -day robber barons who would gladly overpay for a 286 00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:23,140 of artwork they could never publicly display or even acknowledge. 287 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:25,660 Well, what about your conscience? Didn't that bother you? 288 00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:27,300 My conscience? 289 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:32,400 Um... Yes, well, it tugged a bit on occasions. 290 00:19:33,580 --> 00:19:36,500 But I was young, Marissa, intoxicated with the good life. 291 00:19:36,980 --> 00:19:40,400 Besides, I figured if my copies were fooling the experts, then the public 292 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:41,400 really losing out. 293 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:47,340 Anyway, all my sins compared to those who were underwriting my career. So then 294 00:19:47,340 --> 00:19:48,340 what happened, Clive? 295 00:19:48,820 --> 00:19:51,180 Well, all good things come to an end. 296 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:56,080 And one hot summer night in Torremolinos, Marty blundered. 297 00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:01,760 In a rare fit of generosity, he made a gift to a dark lady of his acquaintance. 298 00:20:01,980 --> 00:20:03,660 A watercolour by Goya. 299 00:20:04,260 --> 00:20:07,780 Recently liberated by yours truly from a nearby villa. 300 00:20:08,940 --> 00:20:12,280 Unfortunately, the police were onto the theft and caught him red -handed. 301 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,540 Poor Marty, he took the fall and so me. 302 00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:19,040 Ah, the vicissitudes of fortune. 303 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:21,980 How the wheel turns. 304 00:20:23,660 --> 00:20:26,240 Somehow the years passed and I found myself in Chicago. 305 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:30,060 where a local businessman who'd made an illegal fortune through insider trading 306 00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:34,120 expressed keen interest in a Vincent van Gogh he'd long admired. 307 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:39,640 In the course of researching the assignment, I met a young woman by the 308 00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:42,980 Faye Davis, recently employed as a curator of the museum. 309 00:20:46,860 --> 00:20:52,680 Drawn together by a mutual interest in art, we soon developed a warm 310 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:56,500 Fay knew nothing of my chosen profession. 311 00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:59,180 I pulled off the Van Gogh job without a hitch. 312 00:20:59,900 --> 00:21:03,200 Unfortunately, I hadn't counted on Fay's expertise. 313 00:21:04,740 --> 00:21:09,280 She detected the forgery, put two and two together, and came up with me. 314 00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:14,340 We talked things over, and I solemnly undertook to mend my ways. 315 00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:19,080 To it, to return the painting, give up crime, and make an honest woman out of 316 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:20,009 Fay. 317 00:21:20,010 --> 00:21:24,730 Or perhaps I should say, allow her to make an honest man out of me. So you 318 00:21:24,730 --> 00:21:25,730 going to marry her? 319 00:21:25,870 --> 00:21:28,270 What else could I do? I finally met my match. 320 00:21:28,510 --> 00:21:29,790 But she got cold feet. 321 00:21:30,530 --> 00:21:31,530 Well, not exactly. 322 00:21:31,770 --> 00:21:34,230 So she got cold feet. If you just let me finish. 323 00:21:34,850 --> 00:21:35,850 Let him finish. 324 00:21:36,770 --> 00:21:37,770 Finish. 325 00:21:37,930 --> 00:21:41,450 I set out to retrieve the Van Gogh from its new home. I told Faye to meet me at 326 00:21:41,450 --> 00:21:44,990 the museum at midnight, when who should come crawling out of the upholstery but 327 00:21:44,990 --> 00:21:47,230 say goodbye, Clive. My old pal. 328 00:21:48,070 --> 00:21:52,550 One of the worst to wear after three years in a Spanish prison, Marty was in 329 00:21:52,550 --> 00:21:54,630 extremely truculent state of mind. 330 00:21:55,030 --> 00:21:57,750 Only my quick wit saved me from a grisly fate. 331 00:21:58,670 --> 00:22:04,130 I had to disappear double quick, and Faye, poor Faye, was left in the lurch, 332 00:22:04,170 --> 00:22:06,630 feeling betrayed and abandoned. 333 00:22:07,410 --> 00:22:09,470 So you never contacted her? 334 00:22:10,050 --> 00:22:11,890 What can I say that she never believed? 335 00:22:12,290 --> 00:22:14,510 Hell hath no fury in all that. 336 00:22:15,390 --> 00:22:17,970 Besides, I figured that fate was trying to tell me something. 337 00:22:18,790 --> 00:22:20,090 That it was too late to change. 338 00:22:20,570 --> 00:22:22,010 You know, once a thief. 339 00:22:22,490 --> 00:22:24,550 So how long ago was this, Clive? 340 00:22:24,990 --> 00:22:25,990 Three years. 341 00:22:26,290 --> 00:22:28,270 Yeah, I laid low in a variety of countries. 342 00:22:28,930 --> 00:22:31,650 Finally made it back here to the one place I figured they wouldn't look for 343 00:22:31,750 --> 00:22:32,750 The scene of the crime. 344 00:22:33,430 --> 00:22:35,370 I made a living painting portraits. 345 00:22:36,910 --> 00:22:37,910 Children, mostly. 346 00:22:38,930 --> 00:22:42,190 I was beginning to think I'd put my past behind me. And then we ran into each 347 00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:44,310 other. Yes, well, no regrets there. 348 00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:50,600 Saving Doris was one of the few acts I can look back on with unabashed pride. 349 00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:52,620 I should be grateful to you, old man. 350 00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:54,660 Let me get this straight. 351 00:22:55,140 --> 00:22:57,480 This museum has your Van Gogh. 352 00:22:57,900 --> 00:23:00,620 So where is Van Gogh's Van Gogh? 353 00:23:01,260 --> 00:23:03,960 Well, actually, not very far from here, in a private home. 354 00:23:05,180 --> 00:23:06,440 So now what? 355 00:23:07,380 --> 00:23:08,800 Oh, I would have thought it was obvious. 356 00:23:09,060 --> 00:23:11,880 I retrieved the picture and I replaced it in the museum. 357 00:23:12,810 --> 00:23:16,250 It's either that or face the fury of Faye Davis, which is a fate I'd rather 358 00:23:16,250 --> 00:23:17,250 avoid. 359 00:23:17,410 --> 00:23:20,150 So you're going to steal that painting? 360 00:23:20,710 --> 00:23:23,470 In a nutshell, yes. And not to worry, hobos. 361 00:23:24,070 --> 00:23:27,270 I may be out of practice, but this last new business is like riding a bicycle. 362 00:23:28,390 --> 00:23:29,690 Oh, better go. 363 00:23:29,970 --> 00:23:30,990 I've got a lot of work to do. 364 00:23:33,590 --> 00:23:35,710 Not to worry, hobos. 365 00:23:38,870 --> 00:23:40,750 I won't mind. I told you, this is my chair. 366 00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:55,000 He's mauled by guard dogs arrested. 367 00:24:00,120 --> 00:24:00,520 You 368 00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:08,740 don't 369 00:24:08,740 --> 00:24:12,060 want to help him? Help him? The guy's a crook. What a nice crook. 370 00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:13,880 He has a good heart, Gary. 371 00:24:14,240 --> 00:24:19,140 He just went down the wrong road for a while. He's been down the same wrong 372 00:24:19,140 --> 00:24:21,300 for 20 years now. But it was for a good cause. 373 00:24:21,770 --> 00:24:25,490 Yeah, something like stealing from the rich to enlighten the poor. Look, you'd 374 00:24:25,490 --> 00:24:29,350 be giving him a chance to redeem himself, to start over again, and do 375 00:24:29,350 --> 00:24:30,350 with his life. 376 00:24:30,490 --> 00:24:35,490 What you two want me to do is you want me, with a known felon, to break into a 377 00:24:35,490 --> 00:24:37,390 private residence and steal a painting. 378 00:24:37,730 --> 00:24:41,830 A stolen painting that was illegally obtained by a guy who made millions 379 00:24:41,830 --> 00:24:43,130 cheating in the stock market. 380 00:24:45,190 --> 00:24:46,290 You want to take my car? 381 00:24:53,070 --> 00:24:55,830 This is what comes of feisty research. 382 00:25:00,890 --> 00:25:02,650 Are you hungry, pup? 383 00:25:04,730 --> 00:25:06,750 Nice doggy. What was that? 384 00:25:06,990 --> 00:25:07,989 Sleeping pelt. 385 00:25:07,990 --> 00:25:11,890 Good boy. 386 00:25:12,230 --> 00:25:13,570 Nice doggy. 387 00:25:16,690 --> 00:25:18,490 That was quick. 388 00:25:19,380 --> 00:25:22,240 Well, I'm much obliged to you, chap, but how on earth did you find me? 389 00:25:23,700 --> 00:25:25,680 Well, I read an article. 390 00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:29,700 Ten richest guys in Chicago and three of them happened to be art buffs, so we 391 00:25:29,700 --> 00:25:33,480 went to the first two houses earlier, which is why we were late. 392 00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:34,760 What about the dog? 393 00:25:36,420 --> 00:25:37,520 The dog was in the article. 394 00:25:38,420 --> 00:25:39,420 Oh, I see. 395 00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,780 Oh, right, well, I'll be off then. 396 00:25:45,180 --> 00:25:46,180 Good hunting. 397 00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:53,020 Wait a minute. I'm not going anywhere. 398 00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:54,480 Look at that. 399 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:08,960 Don't do that. 400 00:26:09,740 --> 00:26:12,120 Now what? 401 00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:17,180 The painting. There's a passive infrared motion detector. 402 00:26:22,090 --> 00:26:23,090 Lord, you're right. 403 00:26:23,970 --> 00:26:25,010 Crafty beggar. Yeah. 404 00:26:25,590 --> 00:26:26,990 Yeah, but how on earth did you find that out? 405 00:26:28,190 --> 00:26:29,190 Like the article. 406 00:26:29,870 --> 00:26:32,250 That is one well -researched story. 407 00:26:32,610 --> 00:26:35,070 All right, this is going to take some careful maneuvering. 408 00:26:35,390 --> 00:26:36,390 All right. 409 00:26:36,630 --> 00:26:37,630 Steady on, old man. 410 00:26:38,090 --> 00:26:39,090 Cool and calm. 411 00:26:40,290 --> 00:26:41,290 Yeah. 412 00:26:44,150 --> 00:26:45,410 Hey, check it out. 413 00:26:50,820 --> 00:26:53,340 They got an autographed Michael Jordan sneaker. 414 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:55,220 I'm steady as you go. 415 00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:59,800 You know, I think these are the very same shoes he wore against the Jazz in 416 00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:00,800 finals. 417 00:27:23,660 --> 00:27:25,440 This is an original Van Gogh, huh? 418 00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:27,520 How much is a thing like this worth? 419 00:27:27,860 --> 00:27:30,620 On the open market, something upwards of $30 million. 420 00:27:31,580 --> 00:27:32,580 $30 million? 421 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:34,020 For something like this? 422 00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:36,460 Guy can't even stay inside the lines. 423 00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:40,420 Right, now for that museum. This could be tricky. 424 00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:42,780 Um, I might need some help here. 425 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:45,160 Help? Some help with what? 426 00:27:45,460 --> 00:27:48,140 Oh, nothing elaborate, Hoppers. And this time there won't be any dogs. 427 00:27:48,610 --> 00:27:51,490 Let me tell you something. First of all, my name's not Hobbers. And second of 428 00:27:51,490 --> 00:27:55,190 all, they don't have dogs at museums. They've got guards with guns. 429 00:27:55,650 --> 00:28:00,070 Clive, why don't you just turn the painting over to the police anonymously 430 00:28:00,070 --> 00:28:02,550 something? I can't do it, dear. There's Fay to consider. 431 00:28:03,290 --> 00:28:04,290 Fay? 432 00:28:04,490 --> 00:28:05,490 Yes. 433 00:28:05,630 --> 00:28:09,350 Oh, didn't I tell you? She was the curator of the museum when I stole the 434 00:28:09,350 --> 00:28:13,790 Gogh. If it came out that the museum had accepted a piece of forged art while 435 00:28:13,790 --> 00:28:17,450 she was on watch, so to speak, it would just ruin her reputation. 436 00:28:18,620 --> 00:28:22,360 No, the only way I can put these things right is to break into that museum 437 00:28:22,360 --> 00:28:24,000 myself and replace the painting. 438 00:28:25,300 --> 00:28:26,660 How are plans shaping up? 439 00:28:27,420 --> 00:28:28,660 Hey, talk with the devil. 440 00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:30,820 Hey. My God. 441 00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:32,840 You did it. 442 00:28:33,540 --> 00:28:35,300 Uh, the first part, yes. 443 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:37,740 Uh, Faye, could we talk out there? 444 00:28:38,980 --> 00:28:42,680 Fantastic. Yeah, isn't it, Jess? Would you excuse us? Sure, um, make yourselves 445 00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:43,339 at home. 446 00:28:43,340 --> 00:28:44,340 Uh, just through here. 447 00:28:46,580 --> 00:28:47,620 What are you doing here? 448 00:28:48,190 --> 00:28:49,069 Isn't it obvious? 449 00:28:49,070 --> 00:28:50,070 Keeping an eye on you. 450 00:28:50,710 --> 00:28:52,470 No need for that. I gave you my word. 451 00:28:53,290 --> 00:28:56,910 Yes, well, we both know what that's worth, don't we? 452 00:29:00,470 --> 00:29:05,190 Faye, about that night, I... What? 453 00:29:08,490 --> 00:29:09,490 Nothing. 454 00:29:12,210 --> 00:29:13,470 It would have worked anyway. 455 00:29:15,610 --> 00:29:16,690 Yeah, well, that's all. 456 00:29:17,050 --> 00:29:18,070 Blood under the bridge, isn't it? 457 00:29:19,450 --> 00:29:22,130 So how are you getting on in New York? Guggenheim still treating you well? 458 00:29:22,650 --> 00:29:25,290 How did you know I was working at the Guggenheim? 459 00:29:25,750 --> 00:29:28,210 I like to keep my hand in it. You've had several offers. 460 00:29:28,590 --> 00:29:30,090 I understand the Getty wanted you. 461 00:29:31,290 --> 00:29:33,430 If I'm treating smog, forget it. 462 00:29:34,850 --> 00:29:36,270 You always were a snob. 463 00:29:38,970 --> 00:29:40,030 You're looking well, Faye. 464 00:29:42,850 --> 00:29:43,850 Don't. 465 00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:47,140 I never stopped thinking about you. 466 00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:49,620 Not ever. 467 00:30:00,420 --> 00:30:01,420 Ow. 468 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:04,760 Didn't know you still cared. 469 00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:08,540 Don't flatter yourself. I stopped thinking about you a long time ago. 470 00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,200 Faye, you are a terrible liar. 471 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:12,440 Not as big as you are. 472 00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:14,540 You had a gift, Clive. 473 00:30:15,100 --> 00:30:16,220 He turned your back on it. 474 00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:19,320 I'm a copyist, a mimic, that's all. 475 00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:23,720 Maybe you are just a thief. 476 00:30:31,640 --> 00:30:32,840 So what time do we start? 477 00:30:58,220 --> 00:30:59,300 Thank you. 478 00:31:33,639 --> 00:31:35,060 thank you 479 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:06,640 I can't believe I'm doing this. 480 00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:09,440 Yeah, it's like the blind leading the blind, huh? 481 00:32:12,180 --> 00:32:14,500 Ten minutes. Everybody understand their roles? 482 00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:21,020 Yes, sir. We go to the museum, we fall to pieces, and we get arrested. 483 00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:22,720 Steady on, Charles. 484 00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:25,880 Just do as we rehearsed. Everything will work out like clockwork. 485 00:32:26,300 --> 00:32:27,420 Everything is under control. 486 00:32:28,740 --> 00:32:30,020 Oh, not everything. 487 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:34,100 Ooh, what is this, a private party? Or is anyone welcome? 488 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:46,780 Look, Marty, let her go. Just take me in her place, all right? 489 00:32:47,140 --> 00:32:48,740 Trade her life for yours. 490 00:32:49,780 --> 00:32:51,860 Yeah, lady, I think you've just been insulted. 491 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:53,840 What do you want, Marty? 492 00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:56,200 Well, now, what could it possibly be? 493 00:32:56,740 --> 00:32:57,740 All right, let's see. 494 00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,120 Her life for the keys to your car. 495 00:33:01,500 --> 00:33:02,500 No, no. 496 00:33:02,820 --> 00:33:05,540 Her life for a certain piece of art. 497 00:33:05,940 --> 00:33:06,940 Getting warmer. 498 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:12,060 Her life for a certain $30 million piece of art. 499 00:33:12,460 --> 00:33:14,240 Ah, now we're getting hot. 500 00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:27,460 Clive. Here, Marty, take it. It's yours. Just go. 501 00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:30,660 Uh -huh, uh -huh, I see. 502 00:33:31,220 --> 00:33:35,700 Her life for a fake Vanco. Now that's what I call a real smart trade. 503 00:33:36,080 --> 00:33:39,060 Yeah, but see, the thing is, Marty, it's not a fake. It's the real thing. 504 00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:43,280 Oh, right, right. And you guys have gone and you've formulated this incredibly 505 00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:45,640 elaborate plan to steal the fake. 506 00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:48,440 Yeah. That makes perfect sense to me. 507 00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:53,780 Monty. One more word out of you, she's toast. 508 00:33:54,020 --> 00:33:56,080 Now, let's get this show on the road. Shake it. 509 00:33:57,780 --> 00:34:01,300 You know, I'm sure you got a great plan, Clive. Tell me all about it on the way. 510 00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:02,880 Move it. Let's go. 511 00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:04,960 You're not going to need a paper where we're going. 512 00:34:06,380 --> 00:34:07,380 Shake it. 513 00:34:15,659 --> 00:34:16,659 It's showtime. 514 00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:20,120 Marty, would you listen to me? These people are innocent. 515 00:34:20,620 --> 00:34:24,900 The only reason they're involved is because of a remarkable sense of 516 00:34:24,900 --> 00:34:25,900 and decency. 517 00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:29,679 Now, come on, Marty. Let them go. I implore you. 518 00:34:30,020 --> 00:34:32,800 Look, I'll get you the Van Gogh myself. 519 00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:36,760 Or I'll turn myself in. Whatever you want. 520 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:40,340 Your recent conversion to sainthood is truly touching, Clark. 521 00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:44,620 But what's beginning to really bug me is how stupid you think I am. 522 00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:47,800 Now let's get going. 523 00:34:48,420 --> 00:34:51,960 Well, let's go, Marissa. All right. Phase one. 524 00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:53,800 Nice try. 525 00:34:59,540 --> 00:35:02,200 Excuse me, miss. We close in five minutes. 526 00:35:02,700 --> 00:35:04,040 Oh, thank you. 527 00:35:05,720 --> 00:35:10,200 I couldn't help noticing, but you were wondering what a blind person is doing 528 00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:11,200 an art museum. 529 00:35:11,780 --> 00:35:12,780 Frankly, yes. 530 00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:18,260 You may find this hard to believe, but sometimes I can feel the painting. 531 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:24,540 Some of these works exude such an aura, I can sense the color and the form right 532 00:35:24,540 --> 00:35:25,540 off the canvas. 533 00:35:26,300 --> 00:35:29,060 Wow. Kind of a metaphysical thing. 534 00:35:29,620 --> 00:35:30,620 Exactly. 535 00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:35,540 As a matter of fact, sometimes I get so inspired, I do a little painting myself. 536 00:35:36,240 --> 00:35:38,080 Amazing. It is, isn't it? 537 00:35:39,380 --> 00:35:41,360 Well, I, uh... 538 00:35:41,610 --> 00:35:43,790 I have to call for my ride. Could you please... Oh, yes. 539 00:35:44,030 --> 00:35:46,630 Phones are down the hall on the left. Thank you. 540 00:35:47,310 --> 00:35:53,030 I feel a painting. Oh, brother. 541 00:35:56,790 --> 00:35:58,770 The scene will be closing in five minutes. 542 00:36:03,970 --> 00:36:08,570 Listen, Clay, this may not be the most opportune time to say this, but I meant 543 00:36:08,570 --> 00:36:09,730 everything I said back at the bar. 544 00:36:11,180 --> 00:36:12,720 I never stopped thinking about you. 545 00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:14,600 Never. 546 00:36:15,260 --> 00:36:20,000 And I... I just... Me too. 547 00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:22,940 I think I need a hanky here. 548 00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:25,340 No more musher. I plug her now. 549 00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:20,400 Yeah, this is Andrews over at the University of Chicago Art Museum. 550 00:37:21,540 --> 00:37:23,900 I've got a break -in alarm on the second floor. 551 00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:26,040 Okay, is that some guys over? 552 00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:31,720 Hey, pal, do we have a security violation here? Who are you? Well, my, 553 00:37:31,720 --> 00:37:33,880 Gilliland, internal and systems management. 554 00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:35,840 I got a beep. What's the situation? 555 00:37:36,120 --> 00:37:38,080 It looks like a second -story emergency exit. 556 00:37:38,360 --> 00:37:39,420 Oh, did you call the police? 557 00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:41,960 Yeah, just a minute ago. I was going to go check it out myself. 558 00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:46,080 Whoa, whoa, whoa, no heroics. You let the pros do what they're paid to do. Got 559 00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:47,590 that? Got it. Good. 560 00:37:48,010 --> 00:37:50,530 What's the problem here? We got a little situation here, officer. 561 00:37:50,750 --> 00:37:54,310 That was quick. Yeah, we had 36 over 18, 25 minutes. I had to give a quick 10 562 00:37:54,310 --> 00:37:57,470 -4. Oh, well, we got a possible intruder on the second floor. Emergency exit at 563 00:37:57,470 --> 00:37:58,470 14, 24, 16. 564 00:37:58,710 --> 00:37:59,710 Oh, well, go check it out. 565 00:38:00,350 --> 00:38:02,890 Yeah, you do that, officer. Check it out right away. Thank you. 566 00:38:05,790 --> 00:38:06,930 Hey, how's it going? 567 00:38:07,470 --> 00:38:10,310 Well, as the man said when he jumped off the 20 -story building, so far, so 568 00:38:10,310 --> 00:38:13,070 good. By my watch, we've got five minutes before the real police arrive. 569 00:38:13,070 --> 00:38:14,270 yours. See you in the car. 570 00:38:15,370 --> 00:38:18,350 Oh, yeah? I've designed security systems all over the world. 571 00:38:18,650 --> 00:38:19,650 The Louvre. 572 00:38:20,350 --> 00:38:21,350 In Paris. 573 00:38:21,970 --> 00:38:23,210 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. 574 00:38:23,430 --> 00:38:24,430 Cleveland. 575 00:38:25,390 --> 00:38:27,210 The, uh... Ah, here's your problem. 576 00:38:27,690 --> 00:38:28,690 Oh! 577 00:38:29,090 --> 00:38:30,090 A blind lady? 578 00:38:30,310 --> 00:38:31,850 Sorry, I got lost. 579 00:38:32,170 --> 00:38:35,710 If you don't mind, I'll let you take it from here, huh? Right, sorry to bother 580 00:38:35,710 --> 00:38:36,710 you. 581 00:38:45,610 --> 00:38:47,210 He's having some sort of an attack or something. 582 00:38:47,430 --> 00:38:48,109 Hey, buddy. 583 00:38:48,110 --> 00:38:49,510 You need a doctor or something? 584 00:38:49,750 --> 00:38:51,230 A pill. What? 585 00:38:51,510 --> 00:38:53,910 My pill. You've got to do something. Help him. 586 00:38:54,310 --> 00:38:56,770 Take it easy, little fella. Take it easy. 587 00:38:57,370 --> 00:38:58,450 In my pocket. 588 00:38:58,910 --> 00:38:59,910 My pocket. 589 00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:34,360 Thank you. 590 00:39:34,940 --> 00:39:35,899 You okay? 591 00:39:35,900 --> 00:39:37,240 I have a genetic condition. 592 00:39:38,060 --> 00:39:40,280 To prevent bloating? The brain. 593 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:42,080 Blows up like a pumpkin. 594 00:39:42,800 --> 00:39:44,960 But, uh, I'm feeling much better now. 595 00:39:45,380 --> 00:39:46,218 Well, you sure? 596 00:39:46,220 --> 00:39:47,480 Yeah, yeah. I'll tell you what, huh? 597 00:39:47,780 --> 00:39:51,080 Why don't I escort the lady out and you, uh, keep an eye on things over here, 598 00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:52,120 okay? Okay. 599 00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:53,560 Good luck. 600 00:39:54,380 --> 00:39:55,380 Shall we? 601 00:39:55,460 --> 00:39:56,460 Shall we? 602 00:39:56,580 --> 00:39:57,580 Hey. 603 00:40:05,070 --> 00:40:06,070 Rush, you old man. 604 00:40:06,150 --> 00:40:07,430 These things cannot be rushed. 605 00:40:12,750 --> 00:40:13,930 All right, there we are. 606 00:40:15,670 --> 00:40:16,670 Bravo! 607 00:40:17,570 --> 00:40:19,910 Marty, I was getting on my own. 608 00:40:20,610 --> 00:40:21,850 All right, well, where's Fanny? 609 00:40:22,090 --> 00:40:25,550 Found the gag in the van, Clyde. But not to worry, I didn't hurt her. 610 00:40:25,770 --> 00:40:28,750 She stood her enough to get involved with you. I figure, well, that's 611 00:40:28,750 --> 00:40:30,130 enough. Okay, hand it over. 612 00:40:31,950 --> 00:40:34,350 Come on, sonny, don't be a fool. I said hand it over. 613 00:40:37,830 --> 00:40:40,030 Wait a minute. How do I know if this is the real one or not? 614 00:40:41,510 --> 00:40:44,110 Hey, you know, it's the real one. Look, you know where I live, you know where I 615 00:40:44,110 --> 00:40:45,110 work. Ah, shut up. 616 00:40:45,670 --> 00:40:47,910 My boy, I'd twug you right now. 617 00:40:48,290 --> 00:40:51,130 But I think you'll suffer a lot more knowing how much I'm going to be 618 00:40:51,130 --> 00:40:52,310 it up on my percentage of it. 619 00:40:52,810 --> 00:40:55,270 I think you're about five mil, Nespa. 620 00:40:56,630 --> 00:40:57,630 Toodles, mate. 621 00:41:00,910 --> 00:41:01,910 Five million? 622 00:41:02,910 --> 00:41:05,870 It's rather an optimistic figure, don't you think, for a fake Van Gogh? 623 00:41:07,190 --> 00:41:09,670 Yeah, but I gave him the real one. Come on, let's go. You gave him the real one? 624 00:41:09,670 --> 00:41:10,448 Come on, let's go. 625 00:41:10,450 --> 00:41:11,950 What did you give him the real one for? 626 00:41:16,830 --> 00:41:17,850 Hold it right there! 627 00:41:18,390 --> 00:41:21,870 Now! Keep it up! Hands up! Let's go! 628 00:41:22,090 --> 00:41:23,950 Quiet! Don't move, it's right there. 629 00:41:25,390 --> 00:41:26,810 This would cost you your job! 630 00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:30,880 He doesn't look very happy, does he? 631 00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:38,720 So Marty gets caught with the real 632 00:41:38,720 --> 00:41:42,460 painting. The police figured he was inside the museum, so we have to catch. 633 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:45,860 And the illustrious career of the chameleon comes to an end. 634 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:47,400 Finally brought to justice. 635 00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:50,860 Well, wait a minute. Marty wasn't the chameleon. You are. 636 00:41:51,620 --> 00:41:55,140 Well, the police, they don't know that. I won't tell if you don't. 637 00:41:56,180 --> 00:41:57,820 Say no evil, speak no evil. 638 00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:02,040 Tell me, Hobbers, you snide beggar, how did you manage this one? 639 00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:05,120 Yeah, Hobbers, I was going to name the same thing, considering you didn't have 640 00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:07,380 any visual aid this time, if you know what I mean. 641 00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:12,660 Oh, well, I was... Well, we were running late, and I figured the police couldn't 642 00:42:12,660 --> 00:42:16,160 be far away when Morty showed up, so it was a rare opportunity, and I took it. 643 00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:18,138 Improvisational art. 644 00:42:18,140 --> 00:42:20,280 Yeah, something like that. 645 00:42:20,540 --> 00:42:21,540 Very good. 646 00:42:21,620 --> 00:42:23,100 Now, how'd you get? 647 00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:24,760 Huh? 648 00:42:25,180 --> 00:42:26,180 And, uh... 649 00:42:26,430 --> 00:42:28,050 Take this silly toy with you, will you? 650 00:42:30,730 --> 00:42:34,990 Because Faye and I have got, ooh, three years to catch up on. 651 00:42:35,270 --> 00:42:36,249 We do? 652 00:42:36,250 --> 00:42:37,250 Oh, we do. 653 00:42:38,170 --> 00:42:39,170 Well, 654 00:42:40,490 --> 00:42:42,410 we can take a hit. Come on, Spike. 655 00:42:43,490 --> 00:42:44,490 Come on, Spike. 656 00:42:45,150 --> 00:42:46,870 Hey, you only have to tell us one. 657 00:42:49,610 --> 00:42:51,610 Oh, uh, well, uh... 658 00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:03,600 That was an interesting evening. 659 00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:05,340 Yeah, still pretty early. 660 00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:07,140 Hey, you guys want to get some dinner? 661 00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:08,440 No, I'm going home to bed. 662 00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:09,820 What's the matter with you? 663 00:43:10,060 --> 00:43:12,680 What do you mean, what's the matter? What's the matter with me? I'm tired. I 664 00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:15,060 want to go to bed. Is that all right with you? Stick in the mud? 665 00:43:15,280 --> 00:43:17,820 You need a little excitement in your life, Gary. 666 00:43:18,080 --> 00:43:20,360 Excitement in my life? What did we just do tonight? 667 00:43:21,500 --> 00:43:25,080 All work and no play makes Gary a very dull boy. 668 00:43:25,300 --> 00:43:29,120 Exactly. You know how silly that sounds. You know, I usually don't agree with 669 00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:30,460 Gary, but for once he's right. 670 00:43:30,700 --> 00:43:31,700 I'm right. 671 00:43:41,740 --> 00:43:45,700 We've had quite a few emails and letters asking whether Shalisha Davis 672 00:43:45,700 --> 00:43:50,280 -Williams, who plays Marissa, is actually blind in real life. And the 673 00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:54,600 no, she isn't blind, but spent plenty of time with the Chicago Guild of the 674 00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:57,200 Blind in order to research her role throughout the series. 675 00:43:57,880 --> 00:44:00,100 Next on Hallmark, a Perry Mason mystery. 53140

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