Original subtitles

♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah ♪

♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah

Morty! Morty-y-y-y!

Ohh. Oh, Rick?

Get the car, Morty! Get in the car!

Aw, Rick, I was asleep.

I was having a little Morty sleep.

Morty, get in the damn car now!

Get in here! - Aw, why?

Get in the fucking car, Morty!

He's not coming with you! Leave him alone!

I'm calling the police. I'm calling the police.

He's sick of it. He's sick of the adventures.

Get in the fucking car, Morty!

You leave my brother alone.

- Get out of here. - You leave him alone!

- Get in the car, Morty. - Get out of here.

Get in the car.

Aw, what's going on, Rick? What's happening?

We're going on an adventure, Morty.

Classic Rick and Morty bushland adventure.

We're gonna go for a drive. Big ole drive, Morty.

Eight-hour drive. - Eight hours?

Wh-- what do ya mean? W-where are we going?

Morty, we're gonna go get me cube.

We've got to go to Bendigo to get me green cube.

We're gonna go to Bendigo, Morty.

Aw, Rick, Bendigo? Isn't that 12 hours away?

Morty, check it out.

I did some science to me portal gun,

and now it's also a real gun.

I've got a real gun, Morty.

Why are you holding it to my head, Rick?

Morty, shut the fuck up.

I'm gonna kill you today, Morty.

You're actually gonna die.

I'm gonna blow your head off. - Aw, Rick, please.

If this is a prank, it's not funny, all right?

Could you please just stop the car and let me out?

It's actually starting to scare me a lot now.

Shut the fuck up, Morty!

Shut the fuck up!

I'm so tired of you.

All you do is winge and complain.

It's really getting on my nerves, Morty!

I'm gonna kill you and then I'm gonna kill myself.

I'm gonna drive this car off a cliff, and we're gonna die.

We're gonna die, Morty!

Aw, Rick, I don't wanna die. I-I don't wanna die.

We're gonna die, Morty. We're gonna die today.

We're actually gonna die.

Aw, no, Rick, aw.

Wait one sec. We gotta go get some petrol first.

Morty, while I fill up the tank

go get some chips and shit for the drive.

Get a paddle pub, Morty.

Just these and the petrol for pump 4, thanks.

Sir, if you want, you can buy two of these for only $1 extra.

Aw, nah. Just this, thanks.

You can get a bottle of water from the fridge, 50 cents extra.

No thank you.

Do you have a rewards card, sir?

Oh, nah, just -- just wanna buy this stuff, thanks.

Morty, what's taking so long?!

Aw, I'm -- I'm stuck. I can't leave.

Oh, my God! You just killed him, Rick!

He's a bureaucrat, Morty. I-I don't respect him.

Um, Rick, I think you've said that before.

That's out of context here. - Nah!

Oh, no! I filled it with diesel!

Oh, shit! Agh!

Aw, the car's dead, Morty.

- What? - There's nothing we can do.

We gotta walk, Morty. We gotta walk to Bendigo.

It's gonna be eight days, Morty. - Eight days?

Eight days to Bendigo to get me cube.

- Aw. - Eight long days, Morty.

This is our walking-along-the-highway

Rick-and-Morty adventure!

Rick, I've really got to go pee. Where can I go?

Aw, don't worry your cute little Morty head, Morty,

I'll take you to the bush dimension.

You can pee behind a tree there.

We're in the bloody bush dimension, Morty.

You can pee here.

Go behind that tree there, Morty. That one.

That tree. Do it.

Yay, Morty. Yay.

Okay, don't look.

- Ow! A snake bit me. - What?

A snake bit my penis, Rick.

Oh, no. I've got to suck your penis Morty.

I've got to suck your little Morty penis

to get the venom out now.

What? But you're my granddad.

Aw, come on, Morty. Just one little suck.

It'll save your life. - I-I don't know, Rick.

Isn't there another way?

Nope. Sorry, Morty. It's the only way.

I've got to suck your little Morty penis

Oh, the venom's really starting to hurt.

Don't worry, Morty.

I know a guy in the bush dimension

who will be able to help us.

We'll go see him. Old Mate Dougie the bush wizard.

Let's go!

♪ ♪

G'day, Rick.

Wubba-lubba-dub-dubz.

- Dad? - N-no?

Um... Awkward turtle.

So how's it goin', Dougie?

Me Morty got bitten by a snake.

Anythin' you can do?

Aw, yeah, one sec. Let me check my bag.

P-p-put this -- put this on your cock

What?

P-put the Witchetty grub on your cock

Why?

Ugh, just put the Witchetty grub on your cock Morty.

Aw, geez, I don't know.

What are you, racist?

Just put the Witchetty grub on your cock

Put the Witchetty grub on your cock

Okay, fine.

I'll put it on there, I guess.

Put the Witchetty grub on your cock

Uh, okay.

What now?

Morty, you're so gullible, mate.

- Huh? - We just pranked ya.

That's not a bush wizard, That's your dad.

Yeah, I knew that.

Shut up, Morty. You didn't know.

Had no idea.

We made ya put Witchetty grub on your naked cock

What about the snake venom?

Ah, it was earthworm, you idiot. God, you're dumb.

What? No. It was a snake. It bit me.

Oi, Jerry, jazzy boy.

We've gotta go to Bendigo. Can you help us out?

Oh, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah.

Can't take -- can't take yous to Bendigo, nah.

I can take yous to Uncle Barry, though.

He can take you there.

Aw, yeah, of course. Uncle Barry.

Yeah, take us to him, that'd be great.

Right. See ya later, boys.

Oh, I bumped my head.

Get in the wombat hole, Morty.

Welcome to the ancient bush cave of Uncle Barry.

Gulla-gulla-gulla-gulla- gulla- gulla-gulla.

- Oh, yeah? - Ow.

He put fire ants in my hand.

- Nah, I didn't. - They're right there.

You can see them. - Shh!

You're being rude, Morty. They're goblins.

Kick the ball.

Kick the bloody ball. - Uncle Barry?

Yeah, mate, that's me. And who am I speaking to?

Name's Rick. Dougie sent me.

Look, I don't know who you are, but you look like a top bloke.

And I know this is weird to say

but I feel a strong bond between us.

Yeah, I don't know what it is.

I-I've only known you for 15 seconds,

but it feels like 15 years.

Grab a fucking stubby, mate. You're a damn legend.

Charlene, bring these ripper legends some stubbies

and a pack of menthols!

Sick.

Kick the ba-a-a-ll.

Yeah, kick the bloody ball.

So where yous off to?

Me and me mate Morty here have to get to Bendigo,

get a green cube.

Dougie said you could help.

Bendigo?

Yeah, I-I can take yous to Bendigo.

Actually, you know what?

I've gotta go get me wheel alignment done there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No worries. I'll take you to Bendigo.

We can go in the ute after the footy.

Aw, sweet azz.

See, Morty, things are gonna be all right.

We're going to Bendigo!

Wait a second. Who the hell are yous?

What?

Oh, no, his dementia's playing up.

Uncle Barry's got dementia.

How'd yous get into my house? I don't know who yous are.

Barry, it's Rick and Morty, remember?

You just met them. Calm down!

I ain't calmin' down for no one.

I don't know these blokes.

I've never met them in me life.

Get out! Get out of my house!

Oh, str-- Rick and Morty is over.

Uncle Barry's off his bloody rocker.

Help me, Morty!

Ohhh, me hubby's dead.

Morty, you saved me. You saved me life.

Ohhh, I'm sorry, Rick.

I didn't mean to kill Uncle Barry.

It was an accident.

Morty, I know I sometimes play pranks on you

like getting Dougie

to put a Witchetty grub on your little sausage,

but you are a true-blue Australian hero, mate.

And I wouldn't go on these crazy Bushland adventures

with anyone else.

I love ya, Morty.

Oh, this is real love.

Wait. Don't tell me.

It's me. Uncle Barry.

My dead soul floated right into the bloody ute.

Can you believe it? I'm ute Uncle Barry!

- Un-fucking-believable. - Me husband's a bloody ute.

Hop in, boys. We're going to Bendigo.

- Yes! - Yes!

♪ ♪

Guys, I'm not gonna lie.

The last few weeks have been a bit rough for me.

I've gone through some bad personal stuff.

But when you two came and yous killed me,

and me soul went into the family ute,

I feel like I've become a new man.

I think things are finally looking up for Uncle Barry.

Bazzer, you bloody legend. See you round, mate.

Right-o. Take care of yourselves,

Rick and Morty-y-y-y-y!

Ahhh, Bendigo. Beautiful Bendigo.

Yeah, Bendigo.

Ahhh.

What do you see around you, Morty?

I see...

trees, scrubs,

n-nothing really.

So... where's the cube?

I don't know. You're the one that said it was in Bendigo.

What the fuck are you talking about, Morty?

I never said that.

What do you mean? Why are we here then?

I don't know. I was following you, Morty.

♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah