Original subtitles

Dolores, what's the matter?

Dr. Bentley, do you know what day Friday is?

Friday.

Secretary Day, right? Yes. Okay.

Hi, Amanda.

Hi, Mark. I am going home around.

At least someone remembers.

Hey, Mark.

How do I look? You look...

Ready for a vacation.

I am so ready, it's ridiculous.

I mean, a little sun, a little surf.

If I'm lucky, a little Sandy, a little Sally.

Hawaii.

Jack,

just the people I wanted to see.

Listen, I need your help.

A personal problem. A tad sensitive. Norman, I'm a tad late. Aloha. You're

contemporary.

Rumin, have a way with women.

Stay, Jack. I might need your counsel.

But before I tell you, I need to be assured you'll keep this in the

confidence. Oh, you agreed?

Well, of course, Norman. What is it?

It's true.

It's true.

It's love.

It's love that makes the world go round. Her name is Kathleen.

Hey, congratulations, Norman.

That's terrific, Norman.

Thank you. You've got to get that gut instinct right here when it's the right

one, don't you?

Well, actually, it was my mother's gut.

Kathleen is the first girl she's ever approved of.

Ever?

In your whole lifetime?

Well, more like five or six lifetimes. Mini Briggs is one tough cookie.

What's the problem?

Here's where it gets a little embarrassing.

Kathleen is overly concerned about her biological clock, you see.

That said, she doesn't want to get too involved with a man unless she's certain

he could, you know, put a button in the oven, hit a home run, as it were.

Do you want to be tested? Is that it, Norman?

It's just a formality, really.

Kathleen married...

Absolutely adores me.

Actually, men have less sperm than 30 years ago.

Between electromagnetic radiation, pollution, pesticides, male infertility

the rise, big time.

Not to worry. I always take great pains to protect myself from environmental

hazards. I'll call you later for a referral.

Good luck.

You got a name? Charlie Hawkins. How you doing that,

Charlie?

Give me the deep, Viv.

Clear.

What'd he say, Mark? He said, tell Georgia, Jerry Mathers.

Jerry Mathers? The beaver?

Yeah. Well, yeah.

I lost a lot of blood.

It's weird, though, Mark. What?

Am I kicking over the type of this guy's last thoughts on Earth?

What about leave it to Beaver?

I mean, I can understand Star Trek, but get smart.

Leave it to Beaver? It just blows my mind.

Dad.

Dad. Hey.

How's Charlie?

He was white? No, no, no. I'm just a secretary.

There is a God.

Excuse me?

I said, um...

I'm afraid he's with God.

Charlie's dead?

Is he friend of your son?

No, more like a business associate. He was a private investigator.

He had a done good one, too.

You must be Georgia. I'm very sorry.

He was right.

How did you know that?

Charlie's last words were for you.

Oh, what a sweet man. What did he say?

He said, tell Georgia...

Jerry Mathers.

Jerry Mathers?

The beeve?

He might have been trying to leave you a clue.

Me? I'm not a detective. I'm a secretary.

I don't know what that could mean.

Don't worry, George. I'll find out who did this. I promise.

Yeah, don't you worry. We won't let you down.

We? At least I could do the help.

Well, you're not a detective. I mean, you're a doctor, right? No, actually,

a doctor and a detective.

Oh. I've never heard of that. Neither have I.

Jack, don't you have some rounds to go on or something? Actually, Steve, I got

couple of days off. I'm all yours.

Jack.

Aloha.

I just made some coffee and was bringing him a cup when I found him.

He was lying right here on the floor.

Poor Charlie.

Thank you.

Forensics is on the way.

Now that's strange.

What?

Charlie's dictaphone.

Well, he always put it in his outbox for me so I could transcribe his case notes

from the prior night.

Nothing.

What's the most recent case Charlie was on?

Uh, that would be the Harry Litvak case.

Come on.

Harry Litvak?

Isn't that the ice cream guy?

Yep. Harry and Walter's famous ice cream.

Every time Harry'd come over, he'd bring half a gallon. Hate him.

I'll print up what I've got so far.

Although I know there's nothing on anyone named Jerry Mathers related to

case. It's driving me nuts.

I can't figure out what Charlie was trying to tell me.

Well, maybe it was just the babbling of a dying man.

Thank you, Doctor.

You're welcome, Detective.

Oh, here we go.

Well, according to this, someone made an attempt on Harry's life.

I gather he hired Charlie to find out who it was.

Well, I know Charlie was hot on the suspect's trail, but without his

that's all I know.

Well, maybe Harry Litvak knows more.

Yeah, makes sense. I mean, Charlie probably kept him up to speed, right?

Great. Go.

Uh... Georgia, I don't think it's such a good idea that you go along.

Why not?

Well, for one thing, it might be dangerous. And for another, the

frowns on private citizens getting involved in homicide investigations.

Well, I can take care of myself.

Besides, I owe it to Charlie.

Please.

Come on, Steve. She owes it to Charlie.

And you know what? I'll drive.

You only have a two -seater.

Oh, damn it. That's right.

What? We'll see you there.

I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do.

What do a pageant mean?

Must be an emergency, huh, Jack? Can I borrow your son for a second? Oh, I'm

sorry. My battery's dead.

We better go on ahead.

See ya.

I'm on vacation.

Hey, Dolores, it's Jack. I'm going to turn him off his call.

What do you mean he's not there?

You know what? I got the wrong Sloan.

All right.

I'll talk to you later.

All right.

You know, Mark, I just can't seem to put my finger on this.

There's a very strange odor coming from Charlie's body.

What kind of an odor?

Well, it smelled like cyanide.

Like the bitter almond. Yeah, I know it sounds weird, but maybe you want to take

a look at the body. Yes, I'd like to.

Hey!

Are you all right?

If so, who the hell was that? I don't know.

Maybe it was Jerry Mathers.

Jerry Mathers? You mean the bee?

Yeah.

America's love affair with our ice cream is unending. And we've had another

great month. And as you know, a part of every dollar Harry and Walter earns goes

to charity. This month, Walter and I have chosen to donate to the Rainforest

Protection Committee.

That's right, Harry.

Preserving our natural resources is important to all of us. That's why Harry

I are proud to help out in any way we can.

How do you say that?

Mr. Litvack will be right with you. Thank you.

The hell with the rainforest, Harry. We're wasting our money on a bunch of

trees. It's good PR, Walter. Besides, that's how Dad did it.

Yeah, all the more reason not to do it.

Excuse me.

Harry Litvack? Who are you? Never mind. You're fired. And another thing.

I want to build up our nonfat yogurt line, okay, Walter? No way. We're going

back to butterfat to keep the flavor.

That's going against the whole health -conscious trend of the day, Walter. No

problem. Just lower the cream by 1 % and advertise it as reduced fat.

Lieutenant Sloan.

Homicide.

You mind telling me who the Good Samaritans were that were pretending to

guys in the lobby?

They're models hired by our dearly departed father to be us.

They're in our ads. They're on the logo of the Republic. They're everywhere.

We named a company after you. Why didn't they just use you?

Oh, well, Daddy Dearest didn't think we were likable and charming enough.

So he found Sly and Tyler and plastered their mugs all over the damn company.

The sons he never had. He used to joke.

Funny guy.

Don't I know you?

I hope so. I gained five pounds because of you.

I'm Charlie Hawkins' secretary.

Charlie Hawkins.

Never heard of him.

Excuse me, Mr. Litvak. I'm going to go on my break now.

If you must.

Go.

Excuse me. I've got a pen in my nose.

And I need to talk to Harry alone for a minute, please.

No problem.

Butterfat. Nonfat.

Excuse me.

I'm a very busy man. Could you answer the point?

You own a .45 automatic?

Why?

Charlie Hawkins was killed with one.

You can't possibly think I did it. I hired him to figure out who tried to

me.

And did he?

He said he had a pretty good idea. You know, he didn't give me any names.

Although, I think I know who did it.

My brother, Walter.

And I'm telling you, these cops, they're all alike.

I mean, grab.

grab grab one more pinch and i'll file suit you guys are so lucky working for

two gentlemen like harry and walter oh please i could tell you stories oh i

wouldn't believe a word about them okay well how does this grab you when old

man lit back died six months ago harry and walter each inherited 45 of the

company and their stepmother samantha she's 30 something an old man is 80

something get it oh that grows Yeah, so Samantha inherited the other 10 % of the

company. So, Harry's been wooing her like a minute and a half after the

And they have been doing the dirty deed ever since.

Oh, maybe they're in love.

I don't believe it.

With Harry's 45 % plus Samantha's 10%, that makes Harry majority shareholder.

And if Walter ever found out, he would kill Harry.

Dang.

And I always thought ice cream was such a bland business.

Well, at least we know now that Walter had a motive to kill Harry. And if

Charlie found a way to prove it, Walter had a motive to kill him, too. Yeah. The

question is, what proof did Charlie have?

And what does during Mathers have to do with it?

Maybe this key will help you.

Well, well, the doctor's in.

Actually, he never left.

Well, I thought you had an emergency.

Well, you know, it's funny. That turned out to be a hoax.

You must have been furious.

Yeah, it was probably some pimply -faced little punk. You know, he was trying to

be cute.

Ah, kid.

Yeah. Where'd you get that?

Uh, well, you know, I had a little bit of free time on my hands, and I, uh,

back up and I checked Charlie's office, and I found this tape underneath his

desk drawer.

I guess the police probably overlooked it in their initial search, so... I

it's a Paderbach key.

Well, Charlie never told me about that.

Well, maybe he hid the evidence in it. Yeah, my thoughts exactly.

Just wish I knew which bank.

What's the name stamped on the back of the key?

Reliant safe company.

Figures. They do most of them. I'll call Ida, and she can tell us which bank it

goes to.

She's good.

Very good.

Yeah, I'll hold.

No big deal. I used to do this for Charlie all the time.

Well, should we get started?

We'll let you know what we find.

Well, whoa, Steve.

I found the key, remember?

Yes, but I have the badge, which might help us get into that box.

since we don't have a little thing called a court order.

Hey, you know, maybe Jack can find out what Samantha knows.

Who's Samantha?

Harry and Walter's stepmother and 10 % owner of the company.

Walter will only lead if this safe deposit box turns out to be a dead end.

Well, excuse us just for a moment, please.

Sure. Thank you very much. Steve, can I speak with you for a second?

Hi, Ida. This is Georgia. Steve, you want to talk about dead ends?

Let's talk about your shot with Georgia, okay?

My interest in her is purely professional.

Yeah, right.

All right, so I like her. What's it to you?

I like her, too.

Well, may the best man win.

Name?

Brigg. Norman Brigg.

Here you are. It's down the hall and to the right.

Do you need a magazine?

Do you have Newsweek?

Whatever turns you on, honey.

Oh, no, no. I'm fine.

Just fine. I don't need a magazine. Not even Newsweek.

I appreciate you keeping this under your hat.

I know if this got out, it would totally undermine my authority in the novel.

No, don't worry about it. Nobody has any idea we're in here.

Mark, I thought I'd find you here. I have the preliminary autopsy report on

Charlie Hawkins.

You are absolutely correct about the specimen cup.

I am going to go and call the distributor and get to the bottom of

inexcusable. Mr.

Briggs?

How did you know I was here?

Mark, the whole hospital knows about Norman.

There's a pool on the test result.

Do you want in?

No, I don't want in.

Will you kindly tell everybody who knows not to let Norman know that they know?

Well, I will try.

Anyway, about Charlie Hawkins' autopsy. Now, I think I figured out what that odd

smell was. And if I'm right, there's more to this murder than what meets the

eye. Okay, have a look at it. Okay.

It's down the hall and to the right.

Yes,

talk about commitment to a theme.

You Samantha Litvak?

Yeah. I'm sorry I'm late. I'm Dr. Jack Steele.

Where would you like it?

I beg your pardon?

The biannual checkup for the company insurance policy.

Didn't anybody call you and tell you about this?

Apparently not.

Oh, damn it.

That means I'm going to have to reschedule. Not necessarily.

Exactly what does this examination entail?

Well...

I promise not to poke you any place you don't want to be poked.

You live here?

All by yourself?

All by myself.

My late husband left it to me.

How do Harry and Walter feel about that?

Those twerps.

If you ask me, they should never have inherited the company.

Obviously, you don't think much of them.

They're spoiled children who don't know the first thing about running that

company.

Nice hands, Doctor.

Nice glance.

Why don't I slip into something a little more accessible?

Walter, you sly dog, you.

Well, well, well.

Don't get carried away.

He's cute, but not that cute.

What are you... doing in here?

Trying to save your pretty little behind.

I don't trust that so -called doctor.

He's not your concern.

He is if he finds out about us.

This doesn't work. work out. I could be in a lot of trouble.

The department frowns on cops committing forgery.

Don't worry about it. I can sign Charlie's name better than he did.

Trick of the secretarial trade.

The signature doesn't match.

Matter of fact, it's not even close.

What?

I don't understand.

Well, just wait right there. I'm sure the police will be able to explain it to

you.

We are the police.

Show him your badge, Lieutenant.

We have reason to believe that someone in the bank is aiding and abetting a

notorious check forger, Charlie Hawkins, in his criminal activities.

Well, it wasn't me.

Well, we know that now.

We'd just like to see what's in the box, please.

Seems like you picked up a few tricks of the P .I. trade along the way, too.

Yeah.

I don't get it. What does this mean?

Looks like Charlie was blackmailing Harry and Walter.

Well, no, I don't believe that. I know Charlie.

He never would have been able to do something like that.

Well, maybe you didn't know him as well as you thought you did.

This is my dad.

Hey!

I was hoping I'd find you here.

Nice try, Jack.

Turnabout's fair play, huh?

Excuse me?

Come on, but you just paged me, right?

Trying to get even with me for doing it to you.

Oh, was that you who did that, Steve?

My dad really is paging me. Yeah, me too.

Oh, listen, you guys go ahead. I have something I want to do anyway.

Here, take my car. I'll meet you at Charlie's office.

Okay.

I'm glad you went through with the test, Norman.

Any idea when I'll be getting the results back? You should know tomorrow.

What's the emergency? You know, it came as fast as we could. Oh, good.

Uh, Dolores, did you, uh... Send for Amanda way ahead of your chief. She's on

her way.

You know what? They ought to name a day after me. Don't you think?

Hey, Norman, how's every little thing?

What's that supposed to mean?

Uh, nothing, Norman. It's just a figure of speech. You know, like, how you

doing? You know, where you been? What's your sign?

Mr. Riggs. Yes.

Gentlemen. I have the autopsy report on Charlie Hawkins, and I can safely say

that we've narrowed down the cause of death to two possibilities.

What do you mean, two possibilities? The guy was shot.

Yeah, but the bullet may not be what killed him.

What are you talking about?

Charlie was poisoned, Jack.

Wait a minute. He was shot and poisoned?

We're not sure which one actually killed him. It could be a tie.

Tell you what, whatever poisoned Charlie wasn't fooling around.

Why do you say that?

Well, the autopsy report shows the murderer used potassium cyanide. It's

as lethal as it gets. He doesn't take a big dosage either. Easy to mix and

drink, hide in food.

You know, it seems to me that you are now looking for two suspects.

Yeah, there's no way Walter would have shot and poisoned Charlie.

Yeah, but that doesn't let him off the hook.

Walter still could have shot Charlie, not knowing that somebody else poisoned

him. True.

And that somebody else could be Harry.

Seems that Charlie was blackmailing both brothers, so that gives them both a

motive. Well, wasn't it Harry who first hired Charlie?

Yeah, maybe Harry didn't expect Charlie to find out he was having an affair with

Samantha. No, you mean Walter was having an affair with Samantha.

No, I mean Harry.

Well, Samantha was double dipping.

Because I found out that she was definitely having an affair with Walter,

Active girl.

And we still don't know how Jerry Mathers fits into all this.

You know, Amanda and I caught somebody going through Charlie's belongings.

Scary looking guy.

He actually knocked me over.

Probably looking for evidence.

Which means the next place he might try is... Charlie's office.

George.

Don't worry, Mark. He'll be fine.

Oh, yeah, sure.

It doesn't seem a little more than coincidental.

that both Harry and Walter, totally independent of one another, would choose

almost the exact same moment to kill Charlie Hawkins.

Any ideas?

Follow the poison trail. Murder weapon always leads to the murderer.

What are we looking for?

Peaches.

Make a noise and you're dead.

Hm?

Try that again. You and your boss, you got it?

Now, where is it?

Where's what?

Don't play games with me. Charlie's dictaphone. I want it. Now, you've got

seconds to give it up.

One.

Two. I swear I don't know where it is.

Wrong answer.

David or Jack?

It's me.

Hey, what the hell? Are you all right?

Yeah.

I hate being called a broad.

You have any idea who that was?

Apparently someone who thinks I know a lot more than I do.

At least we know we're on the right track.

Why do you say that?

Well, Charlie always said a PI doesn't really know he's on to something until

somebody tries to kill him. Yeah, well, then we are definitely on to something.

I wish I knew what it was.

Well, I have a pretty good idea.

Look at this.

Call for backup. He got away.

You all right? Yeah, yeah.

Look at this. This is a copy of...

of a bank signature card for Charlie's safe deposit box.

I wrangled it out of the teller after you left.

Why?

Well, because Charlie couldn't blackmail anybody. I mean, you work for a man

long enough, you know if he's honest or not.

It's not his signature.

He didn't rent the box. Somebody just wanted to make it look like he did.

Why would anybody want to do that?

So that we'd think Harry and Walter were guilty of murder.

Did you guys see?

This whole thing's been a setup.

From the key under Charlie's desk and the safe deposit box and the blackmail

money that conveniently leads to Harry and Walter. I mean, we're being led

around by the nose ring.

I hate to admit this, Steve, but I think she's right.

And if she's right, Charlie's murder was a setup, too.

Whoever killed him just did it to frame Harry and Walter.

And I think I know who it is.

Mark Helmanson, gourmet food critic with Channel 8.

How are you today?

Good. Listen, I'm impressed with the fact that you use fresh peaches in your

stuff, flavors.

Very impressed indeed.

Well, sir, you're a man of few words. I like that in a man.

I'd stand and talk to you.

I'm on quite a schedule.

Deadline, you know, television, insatiable.

Well, see you.

What are you doing here? A little bit of snooping.

You just couldn't help yourself, huh?

It's a good thing I couldn't.

Look what I found. This.

You found a pit?

Not just any pit, my dear. Peach pit.

And cracked open to insta -boot.

Talking about cracked.

They don't throw away the peach pits here.

They process them and extract an ingredient called cyanide.

Probably sell it to a pesticide company. Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Cyanide's made out of peach pit?

That's the last time I order a double scoop of peach pit in the house.

Well, the point is, whoever killed Charlie could have gotten the cyanide at

factory. Which makes it even more likely that Samantha's the murderer, because

she could have found out about the cyanide from her late husband.

Didn't you think Harry and Walter were the murderers?

Now it looks like Samantha framed them both in order to take over the company.

Yeah, when I was at her house, I found that she'd taken out partnership

insurance, which guarantees that 100 % of the company, if Harry or Walter die,

are incapacitated.

And life in prison is about as incapacitated as you can get.

Yeah, but you know, that still doesn't explain the guy who attacked you in the

office. Well, maybe he's working for Samantha.

I'm telling you, all we have to do is get her to sign on the dotted line, and

we'll have our murderer.

All right.

We got speed.

Settle, people.

And action.

You know what I'm thinking, Harry.

Not enough chips, right, Walter?

Not. Cut, cut, cut, cut.

It's no good.

What's the matter now, Harry?

We barely got started. It doesn't matter. You're terrible.

Both of you.

Yeah? Well, your father didn't think so.

Yeah? Well, our father went to meet the good humor man in the sky.

Harry, it's time we started doing our own commercial.

Makeup! Hey!

Get out! I told you they were going to give us a boot.

They were born Harry and Walter. We are Harry and Walter.

Relax, fellas.

I told you, you were irreplaceable.

We don't even look good in makeup.

I'll take care of things.

Excuse me.

Mrs. Whitback? I'm sorry to interrupt. I just need your signature on this.

What is it?

It's an inter -office memo about recycling.

Edna said to make sure and have all the officers sign it. You know, give it

extra weight.

Very well.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Well,

what do you think?

I think it's case closed.

Do we have to live back?

Dr. Steele.

You're under arrest.

Under a breath?

For what? For the murder of Charlie Hawkins.

What is going on here? We're trying to make a commercial, for God's sake. Oh,

shut up, Harry.

What happened? Did she faint?

I'm afraid it's more permanent than that. She's dead.

Clear the air passage.

Start CPR.

What a dump.

Imagine me thinking I could play with the big boys, finding clues, catching

murderers. My old man was right.

Go to secretarial school, keep your mouth shut, and maybe you'll land a guy

don't know how dumb you are.

George, I think you're selling yourself a little short.

If it wasn't for you, people might still think that Charlie was a blackmailer.

You cleared the man's name for him.

I guess I did.

Not only that, you were the one who figured out that Walter and Harry were

framed. I mean, it doesn't matter that it wasn't Samantha. It's still

nonetheless true.

We've got good instincts.

Take it from me, I'm a doctor.

Well, I've got a statement from everybody in the room, but it's not much

on. The guy who attacked him in Charlie's office is looking better and

our chief suspect.

Steve, Mark.

Find something?

No, no.

Bitter almonds.

What?

Amanda noticed the same scent around Charlie's body, cyanide.

That means whoever killed Charlie also killed Samantha.

And whoever that is was in this room just before her death because the

time of cyanide is less than five minutes.

We've still got Jerry Mathers out there. This is perfect. I'm telling you, we

cannot buy publicity like this.

What was Samantha's favorite flavor again?

Cherry matter?

Cherry matter. That's it. So, in her honor, every Harry and Walter is going

sell cherry matter at half price for the rest of the month. We're going to

triple our sales.

Hello?

It's the cherry matter. That's it.

That's the clue Charlie was trying to give me before he died.

He didn't say Jerry Mathers. He said Cherry Matter, the ice cream.

The same ice cream Harry kept bringing over to the office.

Cherry Matter.

That's where Charlie hid the evidence. I'm sure of it. Not so loud. We don't

want everyone to know that.

Why not?

Anything? Georgia,

why don't you switch with Steve?

No, I'm fine.

She's just fine.

The murder will be along any minute now, I promise you that.

All right, remember, when the suspect opens the freezer, Georgia hits the

and we nail him.

Showtime, folks.

Walter?

Walter? Of course, Walter. We suspected him right from the top.

Yeah, but we eliminated him as a suspect right after that. That begs the

question. What are you doing here, Walter?

Well, I knew Harry hired Charlie to dig up dirt on me. He's been trying to

squeeze me out of the business since Dad died.

I just wanted to get whatever evidence he had before Harry could get to it and

use it against me.

Walter?

Of course, Harry.

We suspected him right after we suspected Walter.

Yeah, but we eliminated him right after we eliminated Walter.

Well,

nevertheless, that begs the question again.

What are you doing here, Harry?

Look, I paid good money to Charlie to find out who tried to kill me. And I

didn't want anybody like Walter here to bury the evidence, especially if the

evidence points to him. I can't believe you think I'd try to kill you, Harry.

You're my brother, for God's sake. I love you.

Oh, but I thought you guys hated each other.

Yeah, it was a fine line.

Jerry Mathers? You mean the beef?

Of course. He attacked Georgie and he shot it up.

At the risk of repeating myself, what are you doing here? And who are you?

Name's Archer.

Miles. P .I.

I was hired by Samantha to help her play these two bozos against each other.

Her plan was to get one of them so bent out of shape that he'd try to knock the

other one off.

When that happened, I'd be right there taking pictures.

Of course, then Samantha could play Harry off Walter and take control of the

company. That doesn't explain what you wanted with Charlie's evidence, Archer.

Yeah, well, you see, my client selfishly died before I got paid.

So I figured whatever the evidence was had to be worth some dough to someone.

Hey, I got bills to pay like everyone else.

I hate to say this, but any of them could be innocent and all of them could

guilty.

I know, the light.

Now. Wait, freeze.

The bottles?

Of course.

We never suspected them.

Neither did I. Ditto.

Looking for Charlie's dictaphone?

Charlie knew that you two were the ones who tried to kill Harry.

Why?

Why would they want to kill me?

When you two inherited the company, they knew that you wanted to be your own

spokespersons. That meant their jobs were expendable.

Yeah, and unemployed models don't exactly live the luxurious lifestyle

enjoying by acting as the famous Harry and Walter.

So you decided to frame them for Charlie's murder, knowing that Samantha

take over the company, your jobs would be safe.

But when you saw us comparing signatures, you realized we were there

Samantha and not Harry and Walter.

That's why you flipped a cyanide into her glass of water, hoping to put us

on Harry and Walter's trail.

You know, in a way, we kind of were back on Harry and Walter's trail.

Sly, Tyler, you're fired.

All right, let's go.

You too, Archer.

What do I do?

I attempted murder and breaking and entering, for starters.

Come on, come on. What?

Thanks.

For what?

You solved the case.

For the pep talk you gave me earlier.

You made me feel like I could be more than my old man said I could be.

Georgie, you can be anything you want to be. All you have to do is figure out

what that is.

Well, I didn't realize I knew as much about being a P .I. as I do.

Maybe you should consider taking that up as a profession.

I'm just a secretary.

Hey, is there a secretary out there who doesn't know more about her boss' job

than he does?

Sure.

Miss Mitchell, is Dr. Sloan... Hi, Dolores. What are you doing?

Me? Nothing. Why do you ask?

Because you've been... stepping on my shadow ever since I left my office.

I have not, Mr. Briggs, and if it seems as such, we're simply heading in the

same direction.

Well, you can both head someplace else because Dr. Sloan is getting ready to

leave on Secretary's Day without having gotten any diddly squat.

Am I bitter?

Nah. I rise above those childish emotions.

What are you doing?

Oh, nothing.

Just browsing through the help wanted section, looking to be wanted.

You know, I don't ask for much.

Come on, Herman.

How are you doing, guys?

Pretty good.

Did you get the results of the test back yet?

Yes. Well, let's have a look here.

Ah.

Not bad.

Well, within the normal range.

What did Kathleen say?

Kathleen said I placed a close second.

I'm being ostentatious comparing my results to another potential suitor.

young bull, no doubt, with plenty of fiber and a diet.

Oh, Mom, that's terrible.

I'm sorry.

Are you going to be all right?

I don't know, Mark.

But God help my mother, Minnie Briggs.

I'm in the pool. The baby pool.

Totally unrelated.

Dr. Bentley.

Dr. Bentley.

Dad, can I borrow your jacket?

Mark, I need you to cover for me.

Gentlemen, you both look pretty good tonight.

Double dating, are you? Well, actually, only one of us is going out tonight.

Whichever one Georgia picks.

It occurred to me that no young lady should be put under the stress of having

choose between two such attractive gentlemen as yourself. So I've kind of

assumed the responsibility of relieving the pressure on everyone concerned.

Hey. Hi, guys.

Listen, we better get going or we'll be late for the concert.

Concert?

Yes, Dolores. Ray Charles.

One night only. I have three tickets.

Happy Secretary's Day.

Gee, I knew you wouldn't forget. I never doubted you for one moment.

Thank you, Shelly.

Yes, I shall.

Bye. See you tomorrow.