Original subtitles

The Luthi Desi Comedy Hour.

With special guest stars Ida Lupino and Howard Duck.

With Vivian Vance, William Frawley, and Little Ricky.

And now, let's return to...

Today's episode of Hope Springs Eternal.

Will Hope call off her marriage date with wild -mannered Rodney?

Will Rodney cancel his impending departure so that wedding bells may

Or will he let his inability to make a decision stand in the way of true

happiness?

Let's listen.

Hope, darling, don't take it so hard.

But, Rodney... It's not forever, Hope. Must you leave just now?

Now that we've found true love?

I... I must have time to think.

Rodney, I want you to know I'll always be waiting for you.

This isn't goodbye, Hope, my love.

It's just...

Farewell.

Does Rodney really mean farewell?

Will he return?

Tune in tomorrow at the same time for Hope. I will. I will.

know about that, honey.

I could wake up the kids every morning.

But camps usually have a bugler for that.

Oh.

Then I could wake up the bugler.

Please, Mommy.

Well, all right. I guess you can take it.

Where are you and Daddy going for your summer vacation?

Same place we went last year.

But you didn't go anyplace last year.

Well, that's where we're going this year.

Look, honey, you take these upstairs and put them next to your suitcase, and

I'll pack them later. That's a good boy.

Oh, hiya there, partner.

Hi, Daddy.

Are you getting ready to go to scout camp?

Daddy, can I take Mommy along with me?

I'm afraid not. Mommy's going to go to scout camps.

Oh.

Sorry, Mommy.

I wonder if the Cub Scouts have a camp for den mothers.

Well, I got good news for you.

Don't tell me you know of one.

I never cared much for him.

Well, he came over today, and somehow or other we started to talk about summer

vacations. He never remembers my name. I bet he's met me a hundred times. Well,

he's a little absent -minded, but he's a nice guy. I think he's a big bore.

Oh, he has this place. How do you do? How do you do? Very pleased to meet you.

Lucy.

How do you do? What?

Harry has a lodge up in the mountains, and he's invited us to use it next week.

Vermont someplace.

He gave me the name. I got it right here.

It's called Lake Wazzahazzagattacapoo.

Lake Wazzah... Let me see that.

That's Lake Wazzahazzacapoo.

Well, anyway, I got Vermont right.

Gee, if we're going next week, I better start getting my things together.

And you know the best...

there so we can ask the Mertzes to go with us.

Oh?

Yeah. He said that the fishing is just great. He says there's loads of fish

there. Fred and I can have a ball.

I think I'm going to tell him right now.

Wait a minute, honey.

Do we have to ask the Mertzes to go with us?

What do you mean?

Well, just this once, couldn't we go without them?

Why, honey, we haven't taken a vacation without the Mertzes in years.

I know, I know, but I thought just this once it might be fun and a lot more

romantic if we just went away by ourselves.

You know, just the two of us.

Well, you don't look very happy about the idea.

Oh, I'm happy about, you know, being alone and everything like that. It's

that... Well, who am I going to go fishing with?

Me, I love fishing.

You hate fishing.

Well, I know, but if I'm all alone... with you, I'll force myself to love it.

Oh, honey, if we don't ask their mercies, we're going to hurt their

Oh, honey, they'll understand. All you have to do is tell them why we're not

asking them.

Me?

What should I tell them? You're the one that doesn't want them.

Oh, now, honey, it's easy.

All you have to do is tell them that a friend of yours has asked us up to his

lodge at Lake Wachasakapu. How can I tell them? I can't even pronounce it.

Well, tell them we're going to Vermont.

If it's that simple.

You tell him, huh?

You're the man in the family. You wear the pants.

What do you call those things you're wearing?

Pedal pushers.

What were we saying about them, dear?

About who?

The Mercers.

The Mercers?

Ethel and Fred.

Oh.

Oh, the Mercers. Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yes. What great friends we are.

Yeah. And how we've never been apart.

And how does the rest of it go, dear?

You're the one with the memory.

I get the feeling they're trying to tell us something.

That's funny. I get the feeling they're trying not to.

Look, uh, we're going to a lodge in the mountains next week.

Hey!

advance yet.

That's a lot of money, 50 bucks a day.

That's 50 bucks a week.

Oh.

Oh, so you're going to Atlantic City, huh?

Well, what a shame. We were just going to ask you to go to the mountains with

us. Oh, thanks anyway, honey, but we kind of got our hearts set on the

Oh, what a crime.

It's a beautiful lodge, and Ricky says that the fishing is great.

Good fishing, huh? Yeah.

Why don't we go to the mountains with them? We can go to the seashore next

That's a great idea.

I'll write the hotel and get my money back.

Oh, Fred, remember what the man said.

No refunds.

Like I was saying, this is the year for the seashore.

Ah, it's too bad we can't spend our vacations together.

Yeah, it sure is.

Gee, Ethel, I've never been so disappointed in my whole life.

out to be.

All this time planning their vacation, they weren't even going to ask us to go

with them.

Where are you?

Right here, putting the groceries away.

What are you doing in your pajamas?

What else am I going to wear if I'm going to go to sleep?

Sleep? At this hour?

It's only 8 .30.

Well, I know. We've got to get some rest. We're going to get up at 5 o

the morning to go fishing.

Good night.

Honey? Hmm?

I thought maybe we could take a moonlight stroll along the lake.

Maybe tomorrow night. I'm pretty pooped.

Whatever happened to that hot -blooded Latin I married?

Latins can have dire blood, too.

Ricky Ricardo, you come here.

Just come over here.

Look at that beautiful moon.

Look at the way it shines on the lake. Doesn't that mean anything to you?

Yep. What?

Means it's going to be nice and clear tomorrow for fashion.

You should have married a fish. Oh, now, honey.

Well, if it's going to be like this, we might as well go right back home.

Now, look, dear.

I would love to take a moonlight stroll with you if I wasn't all dressed up for

bed.

Well, I'll fix that.

You just put this on, and you won't have any excuse why you can't take a little

moonlight stroll with me.

What's my guitar doing here?

Oh, well, I just thought maybe sometime when we were out on the lake together,

you could serenade me. Oh, no.

Why not?

Well, that scared the fish away.

Well,

just a minute, will you? I don't want to get a shill. Oh, it would be too bad if

you got a shill. The house plant.

How did you get in?

Always check for unlocked windows. A little trick I learned when I used to

Sam Spade.

Good old absent -minded Harry Bailey.

He was going to leave the key on the ledge above the door.

Yeah, well, it's a good thing for us he is absent -minded. Otherwise, he would

have locked the window.

Harry isn't the only absent -minded one.

If you'd remember to fill the gas tank, we wouldn't have had to walk these last

two miles.

Okay, so I forgot. Hey, it's a crazy lodge, isn't it? Yeah.

Well, I'm glad to get here. I'm exhausted.

You're exhausted.

You made me carry the luggage.

So what? You made me carry you.

Oh, sweetheart, I'm so glad this personal appearance tour is over. Yeah,

honey, it's been a grind, but we both agreed it's important to keep contact

the public.

I didn't realize we'd lose contact with each other.

Do you know we haven't spent one minute alone since we left California?

Yeah, I know, honey, but thanks to good old Harry Bailey, we're going to be

alone for a whole week.

Uh, sweetheart.

Do you have to keep these things on forever?

It's night.

Well, you're not going to have to hide behind these things up here. I'm the

one around, and I already have your autograph.

Come on, let's get organized.

Oh, isn't it exciting?

Just think, the two of us alone together for a whole week in this romantic

place. No people, no press, no photographers.

It's going to be divine.

Howard, look.

Huh? A swimming pool, and it's bigger than ours.

Honey. That's a lake.

You're supposed to fortune to keep it heated.

Hey, look.

Old Harry even left us some food. How about that? Good old Harry.

Now we won't have to hike into the village for breakfast in the morning.

come on. Let's unpack.

Yes.

Oh, Howie, we'll take that bedroom over there.

Uh -uh. This one here.

Because it's closer and I'm beat.

Come on, let's turn in. But, Howie, it's so early.

And this place has such a romantic atmosphere.

So? Well, I thought maybe we'd build a fire

and kind of snuggle in front of it.

Oh, honey, I didn't come up here to work.

When is snuggling with me work?

Oh, honey, of course it isn't, but building a...

and go fishing, you see.

Oh.

All right.

If you're going fishing in the morning, I'm going with you.

Are you kidding?

You never got up before noon in your life unless you got paid for it.

To be alone on a lake with you.

I'd get up at dawn for free.

Okay. All right, honey.

We'll get up at five.

Because that's what time dawn is.

You see, Ida, honey, the fish bite best at dawn. It's when they eat their

breakfast. Can't we catch the ones that eat brunch?

How much more can you take?

I could watch it forever.

Well, maybe we should spend our vacation at Cape Canaveral.

Oh. Come on, I gotta get some sleep.

Fishing? Yeah.

What time is it?

Five o 'clock.

Five o 'clock?

You'll wake up the fish.

Now, come on. Come on. You said you wanted to go fishing with me, so you got

get up. Now, I left a cup of coffee and a donut on the breakfast counter. Where?

On the breakfast counter.

Oh, thank you.

Where are the car keys?

Huh? The car keys.

Where are they?

I think I left my sunglasses in the car, so I'm going to look for them.

Five o 'clock in the morning.

I thought you were going fishing with me. Come on. Go away.

Or I'll report you to the Screen Actors Guild.

Come on. Up, up, up, up. Honey,

come on.

Get up. And make me some breakfast, all right?

Oh, I made breakfast hours ago.

I made breakfast, vacuumed the rugs, dusted the woodwork. Thanks a lot.

And you spend the other half telling me about it.

Come on, I'll help you look.

I could have sworn I left them in the car.

just like a sunset, except he goes up instead of down.

Come on, honey, get dressed. I'm going down to the lake and take a look at

Harry's boat.

Come on, get a move on. It's getting late.

Late? How can it get late so...

Harry Bailey.

These are not mine.

Mine are prescriptions.

Whose are those?

Harry's, I guess. I guess you forgot them.

Say, I'll bet you dropped your glasses in that box of groceries you brought in

last night. I'll look.

How do you do?

How do you do?

How do you do?

What are you doing here?

Harry Bailey, the owner of this lodge, he said that we could use it for the

week. Oh, I see. Well, Harry is our agent, and he said that we could use the

lodge for this week.

Good old absent -minded Harry. He's done it again.

Well, isn't this just peachy? Harry!

the general store in the village.

I just got a phone call from Mr. Bailey.

He says to tell the folks who are staying here that he forgot to say

another couple coming up.

And he hopes you won't mind.

Okay. I told you.

Thanks. We got the message.

Say, don't I recognize you?

I suppose you do, darling.

Not you, lady. Him.

Ain't you Ricky Ricardo?

Yeah.

Me and the missus went to New York once. and we stopped at your nightclub on one

of them two -dollar tours.

I sure like the way you sing Baby Lou.

Thank you, thank you. I could listen to you all night, but the bus was leaving

for Chinatown.

Hello. Hello.

I'd like to tell the missus about this.

Don't they go to movies?

I guess one of us is going to have to leave.

Yeah.

Yeah.

One of us. Yeah.

Well, I guess there's only one thing to do, and that's toss for it.

Okay. Call it, Ricky. Well, I don't think that's a very good... Hedge, you

What were you saying, Mrs. Ricardo?

Me?

Nothing.

That's too bad, honey. They won fair and square.

I sure feel terrible about this.

Do you feel terrible enough to toss again? No.

Let's pack.

Yeah. And wait a minute.

Gee, we, uh, we don't want to rush you. Well, you know, if you don't mind, I

would kind of like to get into at least one day's fishing.

Oh, do you two like to fish?

Oh, I love it. She can't stand it.

Neither can Lucy.

Listen, that gives me an idea.

Yeah? This place is big enough for all of us.

Why don't the four of us stay here and you and I can go fishing?

Well, that sounds like a wonderful idea.

Ricky, Ricky, Ricky.

Yes? Can I speak to you for a moment, please?

Excuse me a minute? Oh, sure.

What's the matter with you? What are you going to do that for? We won the toss.

but you know how you hate fishing. Besides, I thought you loved spending a

week with two big movie stars.

Well, ordinarily I would, but this week I was looking forward to being all alone

with you.

What's so special about being all alone?

Are you sure you're a full, hot -blooded Latin?

Look, honey, it just doesn't seem nice to ask Howard and Ida to leave.

down at the boat. Well, come on.

We're going to have a great week together.

Have a good day, Gerald. Have a good time.

For

this,

I got up at dawn.

I'm sorry if I seem selfish.

I mean about not wanting you around.

It's just that I was hoping to be alone with my husband.

Oh, I understand, darling.

I was hoping to be alone, too.

Well...

You'd have had a better time at the Fulton Fish Market.

Well, anyway, wait till my friends find out that I spent my vacation cleaning

fish with a big movie star.

Yeah.

You'll be the envy of all the alley cats in the neighborhood.

You know, I wouldn't mind the boys fishing all day if they just didn't

evening playing gin rummy.

I wouldn't mind the gin rummy in the evening if they didn't dash to bed at

so they won't be too tired to go fishing in the morning.

You know, I think it's about time we did something about this.

Please. You're so right.

What do we do?

We ought to be able to think of something. After all, darling, let's not

We still have our womanly wiles.

You're right.

It's been so long since I used them, I forgot I had them.

Now, listen, this is what we'll do. What?

This evening, when the boys are playing gin, you and I enter, wearing our most

glamorous dresses and drenched in exotic perfume.

Then what? Then, when they see us, they'll forget all about playing gin

they won't be able to resist us.

They won't? Of course not.

And we'll keep them up so late, they won't even want to go fishing in the

morning.

Ida, you may look like a movie star, but you think like a wife.

Doubling mistakes. Now, give me a chance to get even.

You're the doctor.

Yep.

Well?

Sweetheart, I've been on the boat all day long. I can help smelling fishy.

Howie, baby.

Hmm? I thought this evening we'd take a moonlight boat ride.

Sounds like a good idea.

You really think so?

Yeah, you two go right ahead.

Listen, sweetheart, I meant you and I.

Ooh, it's such a lovely evening.

Honey, I've been out on a boat all day today. I'm going to be out all day

tomorrow, so what do I want to go out on a boat tonight for?

Ricky, darling, I thought perhaps we, you and I, not I, then me, could take a

moonlight stroll along the lake.

Again?

We've had our moonlight stroll for the season.

Listen, sweetheart.

We haven't taken a moonlight stroll.

What do you call that two -mile hike we took when we ran out of gas?

Ricky, darling, perhaps we could go out and sit on the porch and you could...

Right in the bottom, wouldn't you know?

Oh, boy. Well, I think I bliss you.

You sure did.

Uh, uh, does that mean the game's ended?

That's right.

Oh, wait a minute, Frankie. You can't quit now. You're way ahead of me.

Okay, we'll play some more.

Honey,

I'm awfully thirsty. Will you get us a couple of glasses of beer, please?

ring -sweet nothings in your cute little ear.

Yeah, well, cut it out, will you? Ricky will think you're telling me something

about his hand.

of some potato chips, will you?

Yes.

What are

you doing?

I just want to sit on your lap.

We're praying, Jen.

Well, go right ahead. Just pretend I'm not here.

I can't see the cars or anything. Don't you like me sitting on your lap?

Why don't we play?

What else? Old me.

Well,

I'll say one thing.

Either we're getting used to the smell or the boys are catching sweet a fish.

Ricky said this was going to be like a second honeymoon.

So did Howard.

There's only some way we could keep them from going fishing every day. How are

you going to do that? Drain the lake?

Hey! Oh, come on.

No. No, no, no. I saw some tools out in the garage. Yeah?

We could drill holes in their boat.

We need lots more morning to get in. It'll be three feet underwater.

Brilliant idea.

Thank you.

It's brilliant.

But it may be a little too much.

I guess it is too nasty.

we should pay a little more attention to the girls.

I had a feeling they were kind of hinting at it last night.

You may be right, Rick.

Ida hasn't bitten my ear since our honeymoon.

I tell you what.

Why don't we roam over to the island tonight for a picnic supper? It'd be a

beautiful moonlight night.

Great idea.

We'll go on to town and get some food so the girls won't have to cook.

Good.

You know, I may even break down in shade. This thing's getting pretty

Yeah, mine too.

I don't know how those Cubans can stand it.

Say, let's surprise them. We won't tell them anything until we come back from

town. Well, how are we going to keep the girls from going into town with us and

finding out?

Don't you worry about a thing.

This, I'll take care of it.

from the village with a basket full of food, champagne.

They're taking us on a picnic supper over to the island.

The island?

How do they expect to get us over there?

On the S .S. Swiss cheese.

Oh.

I suppose we'll just have to move the picnic to the lodge.

Oh, no.

No, I don't want to miss this opportunity with Ricky. The moonlight

romantic island.

Got some way to plug up these holes.

Good luck.

seats and just stay here for a while. Yeah, come on. Honey, come up here and

next to Daddy, huh? Yeah, come on, dear.

Come on.

Oh, thanks. Thanks, Ricky.

Here we are.

Is this fun? Yeah.

Hey, uh, Ricky, how about a little ceremony, huh?

Well, all right.

What would you like to hear?

Something short.

Do you throw my gum away, please?

What are you throwing away?

Well, Ida's a much better gum thrower than I am.

Oh, yes, she's right.

Listen, I'm the greatest little gum thrower in the whole world.

Oh.

We're drifting, Ricky.

Help me with the anthem, will you? Excuse me, Lucy.

Okay.

Just want you to come closer.

But we should get back so that Howard can take care of that coat.

Yeah. Well, I sure had a lot of fun fishing with you. I had a grand time,

I'd be sure to send me my half of the bill to get Harry's boat fixed.

All right, but I still think I should pay for it. After all, it was my wife's

bright idea to drill the holes.

Now, don't give her all the credit. We collaborated.

Oh, yeah.

Well, don't brag about it.

Ricky, I do feel terrible about your guitar.

We're going to spend every minute of it together.

Really, Ricky?

You betcha. Just the two of us.

Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise

Well,

that's the last we'll see of our husbands until we go home.

Yeah?