Original subtitles

Thank you.

told me that he and Ricky are going to judge a bathing beauty contest this

afternoon. I know. How are we going to stop them?

We're not. We're going to let them do it.

Honey, you've been in Florida too long.

Your poor little brain is sunburned. Not at all, Ethel. Not at all. I just

decided that for once I was going to let Ricky do what he wants to. When he told

me about the contest, I said, go ahead and do it, dear.

You said that?

Yes. This is the new understanding me.

Oh, dear, this is quite a blow.

I was counting heavily on the old conniving you.

That's all over, Ethel.

Look, what possible harm could there be in them judging a beauty contest?

Are you kidding?

Well, they sit out on the beach and ogle the girls anyway. This way, I figure

it's supervised ogling.

Well, I don't like it.

And anyway, how can they judge a bathing beauty contest?

I thought we were going for a boat ride this afternoon.

There'll be plenty of time for that. The contest doesn't start until 5 o 'clock.

Hey, where's Ricky?

They want us down at the pool to take pictures with some of the girls in the

contest. Well, Ricky's in the manager's office.

Okay, I'll pick up in the lobby. I mean, I'll pick Rick up in the lobby. You

know what I mean.

Yeah, we know what you mean.

Hey, Rick, they want us down at the pool for pictures. Yeah, I know. I got

wonderful news.

What? I'm going to be in a movie that they're going to make down here.

That's great. Come on, Rick. The girls are waiting. What kind of a movie?

Well, it's a documentary about Florida. It's the whole history of Florida from

the early days of Ponce de Leon until the present days. Come on, will you,

Well, honey, how do you fit into that?

Well, I'm going to be part of the present days. Me and the band are going

playing right here at the Eden Rock Hotel.

Come on, will you, Rick? The bathing beauties are waiting for us.

Will you look at the old goat?

He's practically pawing the...

Oh, never mind, Ethel. I'll be right with you, Fred. I just want to comb my

hair. Hey, Rick, can I borrow some of that fancy eau de cologne of yours?

Sure. Thanks.

Eau de cologne yet?

He hasn't used eau de cologne since Lillian Russell came to town.

Hello?

Yes? We're looking for Mr. Ricky Ricardo.

Oh? And Mr. Mertz.

Oh? We're supposed to have publicity pictures taken with them.

Yes. Down by the pool. Are they in?

Well, um... No, they're not.

Dear. Well, didn't they know about the pictures?

Yes, they knew about them, but they had to go out, and there's no telling when

they'll be back.

Sometimes when they leave like this, they don't come back for hours, days,

weeks, months.

So if I were you, I'd find somebody else to take pictures with.

This is Joe Jarman. Oh, well, hello.

Glad to know you, girls. How are you? This is Mr. Merck. Well, how do you do?

Joe, he's a regular little cutie doll, he is.

We're supposed to have our pictures taken with you down by the pool.

In fact, the photographer's waiting for us right now.

Well, we were just on our way down. I'll just grab some cigarettes and we'll go.

I was so thrilled when I heard you were going to be one of the judges, Mr.

Ricardo. Oh.

I just adore Cuban music.

Thank you, thank you.

Me too.

I must have seen your show in the casino a hundred times. Well, isn't that nice?

I get such a boot out of it every time you sing Babaloo.

Well, thank you very much.

Shall we go, Fred?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's go.

Tell me, Mr. Ricardo, is your accent real?

Oh, yes, yes.

That was a nauseating scene.

Tell me, Mr. Ricardo, is your accent real?

Oh, Joy, look.

He's a regular little cubie doll, he is.

I get such a boot out of it when you sing Ba -Ba -Loo.

I'd sure like to give her a boot.

His nose looked like it was balancing two ping -pong balls.

Hey, what's happened to that understanding attitude?

Where is the new you?

When I saw those two mincing mermaids, the old me came right out of retirement.

Oh, boy, it's good to have you back.

Now, let me see.

How can we keep them from judging that contest?

Yeah, what awful thing are we going to do?

Oh, yeah, but I've got a hunch it's going to be a dilly.

I got here as fast as I could.

Help me, help me, huh? Okay.

Now, what's your plan?

Well, I told the boatman to only give us a half a tank again.

Half a pan?

Yeah. So when we get out in the middle of the ocean, the motor will suddenly

go... And stop.

We'll run out of gas?

Yeah. That's my plan for keeping the boys from judging the content.

Oh, boy, that is a dilly.

That's a double dilly.

Does your plan also include a way to get back to civilization?

Or do we just float around in the Atlantic Ocean forever?

How many times have I ever let you down?

Well, uh... Never mind.

Now, when we're sure that they've missed the contest, I suddenly discover this.

And pour it in the tank.

The boat runs on lemonade.

This is filled with gasoline.

This thermos is filled with lemonade.

And this is filled with sawdust.

keep Fred from judging that contest or don't you? Oh, yes, I do. Well, all

right. I know he's an old goat, but an old goat's better than no goat at all.

Honey, I want to get some suntan oil before we go. There's a little shop down

there at the end of the pier. Okay, let's go.

Okay.

Hey, girls, where are you going?

I want to get some suntan oil. We'll be right back.

Well, hurry up. Yeah.

Daddy. Yes, son?

Is this movie going on?

Yeah, that's it. Isn't she a beauty?

Hold him, Uncle Fred. All right.

As long as we got a little time, I'll explain a few more things to you about

boats. I'm a landlubber. Explain to me, too.

Right. Now, over there, see, in the front, that's called the bow.

And back here, it's called the stern.

So that's the bow and the stern.

The bow and the stern.

That's right.

You're a regular skipper already.

This cruise -along is a dandy little boat, Rick.

Daddy! Yeah?

Your mommy said she was going to bring some lemonade.

Is there any lemonade in front there, Fred?

Here, I brought it, Jack.

See if there's any cocks in there, will you? He's thirsty.

All right, here we are.

Oh, Ricky, the right side of the boat, it's called the starboard side.

Remember that now? The right side.

This smells like gasoline.

It does.

It's supposed to be lemonade.

Well, if it's lemonade, it's made from high -octane lemons.

Yeah, you're right. Yeah.

Is there another thermos in front of that? I'll look again.

Yeah, here's another.

Well, that must be the lemonade.

Why do you suppose they put gasoline in a thermos jug?

Well, I don't know, but it's a very dangerous place to keep gasoline.

What? You can only carry gasoline in a safety can.

I'll take it out of here and leave it in the pier someplace.

You try that.

There. That all right?

Yeah, Uncle Fred.

I wonder what's keeping the girls.

Come on. Oh, here they come. Come on, girls.

Having a good time, honey?

Oh, just wonderful. We love it.

How about you, honeybunch? Oh, Fred, this is marvelous.

He's been looking at his watch all afternoon.

Fred, would you forget about that beauty contest?

Huh?

That's the farthest thing from my mind.

Say, uh, maybe it is time for us to be heading home. What time is it, Fred?

It's, uh, half past bathing, beauty.

I mean, half -assed three.

Uh -oh.

What's the matter, Rick? What's the matter?

I don't know. The motor just stopped.

Well, do something, will you? We haven't got much time.

Happen. What are we going to do now, dear?

Take a look at the angel.

up that motor and I can't find a darn thing wrong with it. Well, you gotta

something wrong, Rick. We only got about five minutes.

Oh, forget it. We could make it now anyway.

Besides, we got a bigger problem.

If we don't get this thing started, we'll just keep drifting further and

out to sea.

Oh, are you sure you're too late for the contest, dear?

I'm positive. We can't make it by now.

Oh, what a shame.

Look, honey, I don't know anything about motors, but, uh...

Maybe we're out of gas.

Out of gas?

Don't be ridiculous.

Well, now, Rick, it wouldn't hurt just to look and see, would it?

All right, it could make you happier. Look and see.

I've been on boats all my life. Since I was younger than little Ricky, I've been

on boats.

I know that these boats don't run out of gas in an hour and 15 minutes.

You're right.

We're out of gas.

Now what are we supposed to do? Thumb a ride on a passing halibut?

Well, now let's not lose our heads.

I seem to remember hearing somewhere that they always keep extra gasoline on

these boats, you know, just for emergencies like this. Here, let me,

down, honey, and I'll just take a look around. Take a look around, honey, see

you can find anything like that.

Oh, I must have the wrong one.

Where's that thermos of gasoline?

Ricky left it on the dock.

Left it on the dock? Yes. Oh, for heaven's sake, why would you do it? How

you know that the gasoline was on the thermos?

Well, uh... I'm waiting. Tell me the story.

I think I'll try swimming ashore.

Of all the miserable things to do, if I was a captain of this tub, I'd make her

walk the plank.

Stop.

What's what?

Over there.

Look, it's an island.

Yeah.

Maybe we can drift close enough so we can wade ashore.

Yeah, we can wade ashore.

Oh, what good would that do? We'd still be out in the middle of the Atlantic

Ocean. Well, it's better than being adrift.

Yeah, it's better than being adrift.

Maybe someone would come by.

and rescue us. Somebody come by and rescue us eventually.

You see, gang, everything's turning out all right.

Isn't it, Ricky?

Isn't it, Fred?

Ethel?

Little Ricky?

I think I'll go below and put myself in iron.

on this island? I doubt it.

Well, let's find out. Call out, Ricky.

Hello there!

Try it in Spanish.

Huh? This might be part of Cuba.

Hey,

they got some coconuts here.

Coconuts?

Oh, yeah.

A lot of coconuts.

like we got the whole island to ourselves.

How do you like that? Maroon on a desert island, and it's got to be with, uh...

Ed, you better be nice to me. We may be here so long that I'll start

looking good to you.

Hey, look at this.

What? Huge footprints in the sand.

So? So this island might be inhabited.

Inhabited by whom?

Well, from the looks of these footprints,

Giant natives.

Giant natives.

No kidding. Look at these.

Oh, boy, he must be a big one.

Now, if I follow them, maybe I'll be able to track him down and find

out.

Well, it could have been a giant native.

Hey, there's a speedboat. Oh!

Listen, Fred, maybe you and I should go out and see what's on the other side of

this island. All right.

Want to go with us, Ricky? Sure.

Let's go explore.

You stay here and see maybe some bulls go by. Maybe you can get their

All right.

Oh, boy, this heat is killing me.

You're either hot or you're hungry. You're always complaining about

Well, that's because when I'm around you, I always have something to complain

about.

That's her island.

You know, sometimes Lucy goes too far.

Well, there's one good thing about her. What's that?

She makes me glad I'm married to Ethel.

You don't do me any good.

Hey,

what's the matter?

Looks like a giant native.

Oh, you've been married to Lucy too long.

You come and look at me. You stay here.

Good night, nurse.

You hold him up, Rick. I'll take little Rick and make a gun for him. Now, wait a

minute, Fred.

Wait nothing. It's uncles and little children first.

Now, it's got to be an explanation. There's no natives in this island.

Well, you tell him that while he's shrinking your head.

Now, Fred, I went to my school...

Back up here now.

Hello. Goodbye.

Hey, what's the matter with you guys?

Huh? Aren't you Ricky Ricardo?

Yeah. Well, I guess you don't recognize me under all the makeup.

I'm Claude Akins. Claude Akins? Yeah. The actor? Yeah.

Oh, God.

How are you, Claude? Good to see you.

even a picture called The Florida Story.

We're shooting the scene where Ponte de Leon landed in Florida.

I'm in the same picture. Really? Yeah, in the present day.

You mean there's a whole movie company in here? Sure, right over there. Oh, for

God's sake.

You're here making the picture, too, huh? No, no.

We ran out of gas. We were taking a boat ride and we ran out of gas.

Oh. You think we could borrow some gas from those fellas?

Oh, I'm sure you can get some from one of the skippers who brought us out.

Boy, and we're locked and running into him, eh? You had us plenty scared a

minute ago.

We thought you were the giant... Daddy, Mommy was talking about you. We thought

you were a giant, Nate.

Hey.

I've got an idea.

You got a little time on your hands?

Sure, why?

Well, our wives are on the other side of the island, see?

And we got a little score to settle with them.

So if you could do us the favor of coming over there.

I wonder what's keeping the boys. I don't know, but after what you did to

I wouldn't blame them if they never came back.

Well, at least we accomplished our purpose. We kept them from the contest.

You got to give me credit for that. Listen, one credit hardly balances 15

of debits.

There's just no talking to you today.

Oh, I must look a mess by now.

Ethel, your nose is shiny.

Why don't you look in the mirror?

Ethel, your nose is shiny.

Ethel, you've got big feet. Ethel, you're always hungry.

What is this, pick on Ethel Mertz week?

Ethel, please powder your nose.

Oh, powder your own nose.

Ethel, I don't blame you for being mad, but there's a huge, ferocious -looking

native standing right behind us.

You never give up, do you?

Please look behind you and see if you see what I see.

Please.

He's trying to tell us something.

Maybe I'd better talk to him. Well, do you think you can understand his

language?

If I can understand Ricky, I can understand anybody.

very much, but we don't want to go village. You go village, big chief.

scared the daylights out of me.

Oh, what a dirty trick. What are you talking about? You started the whole

Hey, you better go and borrow that gas if we're going to get out of here. Hey,

listen, why don't you all stick around? As soon as we're through shooting, the

whole cast and crew are going to have a beach party, a kind of a luau. You're

all invited.

the pictures, so they brought us all out.

And Bessie Arnaz has been presented for your pleasure by Instant Sanka, the

hearty coffee you can drink as strong as you like. It still can't upset your

nerves.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.

Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz will be back next week at this same time.