Original subtitles

And now, I love Lucy.

Hurry up, Ricky. Your breakfast is here.

I'll be there in a minute.

Take your time, dear. It's really too hot to eat.

Operator, give me room 317.

Hello, Fred? Let me talk to Ethel.

What's she doing in the coffee shop?

We just made headlines on the front page. That's what's the matter. Listen

this. Grauman's Chinese Theater robbed.

John Wayne's footprints mysteriously disappear from forecourt. Last night,

footprints and signature of movie star John Wayne disappeared from the

of Grauman's Chinese Theater.

Police are searching for two women who were seen loitering in the forecourt

around 1 .30 a .m.

Tell Ethel I'll call her back.

Well, good morning, dear.

Good morning.

Well, you're certainly in a bad humor this morning.

What do you expect after last night? Oh, now, honey, that wasn't so bad.

I know it seemed terrible last night, but when you stop to think of it, it's

really kind of funny.

Fred and Ethel and me lugging that big hunk of cement all the way from the

theater, and then you making us lug it all the way back, and then us dropping

and breaking it into a million pieces.

It's really hilarious, honey.

It's not funny.

I just hope it isn't in the morning papers.

eat your breakfast.

Where is the morning paper? What morning paper?

Our morning paper.

Oh, that morning paper.

Well, it must be here someplace.

Maybe... No, it's not here.

What's that?

This belongs to the Millers downstairs.

Millers? What are you talking about? Well, eat your breakfast, dear.

come out even. Eat your breakfast, honey. Come on.

Have you seen the morning paper?

Only as it flew by.

I have seen the morning paper, but Ricky hasn't.

Well,

just drop in and say I can't stay.

Ethel, you come back here.

Ethel, I want to see that paper.

Come on now.

Last night, the footprints and signature of movie star John Wayne disappeared

from the forecourt of Grumman Chinese Theater.

Police are searching for two women who were seen loitering in the forecourt

around 1 .30 a .m. by Mr.

and Mrs. Irving Massey of New York City. That must be that nosy couple.

Mr. and Mrs. Massey described the two women as a middle -aged dishwater

And a wildlife frowsy redhead.

Police are throwing out a dragnet for these two vandals.

Oh. Well, I hope that you're satisfied.

Well, what are you going to do?

Never mind.

Give me Gromitian in theater, please. What are you going to do?

I'm going to tell him everything.

Everything? Yes, everything.

May I speak to the manager, please?

Have you gone crazy?

You keep out of this.

Hello?

This is Ricky Ricardo.

Ricky Ricardo.

Well, I just made a picture for MGM.

I'm an actor and an orchestra leader.

A stool pigeon.

And a stool pigeon.

Mr. Manager, look, I want to speak to you about the disappearance of Mr.

Wayne's footprints.

Yes, well, you see, the whole thing was kind of a prank.

See, my wife and her girlfriend went down the... No, sir, my wife is the

redhead.

Well, it's really very funny when you think about it, sir.

You see, they're crazy about souvenirs.

They went down there and they spry the cement loose.

With a crowbar. With a crowbar.

And then they took it home with them.

Is he laughing? No.

You see, sir, the picture that I made is going to come out pretty soon, and I

want to avoid any unfavorable publicity.

So, well, we would bring it back.

That's what I want to talk to you about.

No, no, no, no. Don't send anyone over here. No.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir, we will bring it back ourselves. Yes, sir. Goodbye.

Have you gone crazy? How can we take it back? It's broken into a million pieces.

He says if I bring it back undamaged, he will protect me.

Otherwise, it's a case for the police.

Ooh.

What do we do? How long have we got? Till tonight.

Tonight? Yes, tonight.

They're proving John Wayne's new picture, Blood Alley, there tonight. Mr.

Wayne's making a personal appearance. And there's no footprints in the

forecourt. Oh, no.

Well, kids, our troubles are all over. I just made a duplicate of John Wayne's

footprints.

Now, now, now, now, don't touch it. It's still wet.

How do you like it? Oh, it's pretty awful, Fred.

Oh, it's terrible, Fred. That's no good.

What's wrong with it? Oh, for one thing, the feet are way too big.

Yeah, I guess I shouldn't have used Ethel's shoes.

Besides, the real footprints were made with Western boots, not shoes.

And you don't spell Wayne, W -A -I -N.

I'll go back and make another one. Oh, forget it, Fred. You know, it's

to forge footprints. Yeah.

Look who's turning honest all of a sudden.

Dishwater Mertz and Frowsy Ricardo.

Don't use that expression again. If you don't mind.

I don't like it. Just a minute, please. Not at all.

It's for you, Frowsy.

appointments. Oh, my God. Are you kidding?

You're going to have your head down at a time like this? If I have to go to

jail, I do not want to be referred to as a frowsy redhead.

What am I going to do?

Well, you can always shoot yourself.

Oh, come on. Think of something.

Well, what's the matter with me?

Why don't I call Duke?

Who? Duke. John Wayne. All his friends call him Duke. Oh. He's a wonderful guy.

I had lunch with him at the studio a couple of times.

I'll bet you he'll help me out. Yeah, well, what if he won't?

Then I'll shoot myself.

Brad? What do you think of that?

Good. Looks nice and smooth.

Yeah, I think so.

Hello?

Oh, send him right out, please.

Thank you.

He's here.

He's sure an all right guy.

Say, Rick, is it really true that John Wayne is as tough as he appears to be on

the screen?

Well, he's pretty big and well built. Yeah, well, I heard a fellow in the

barbershop say the other day that when you shake hands with John Wayne, it's

like putting your fingers in a vice.

Well, I don't know about that. Well, I got a pretty good grip myself, you know.

Fred, you're not going to act like a cornball, are you? Oh, no, don't worry.

I'm going over and get Ethel's autograph book. She'll want his signature.

All right.

If you annoy him enough, you may find out how tough it is. All right, all

Hi, Duke.

Hi, man.

Good to see you. Nice to see you, Duke.

It's sure great of you to help me out this way. Oh, well, I'm glad to.

I'm very flattered that your wife is such a fan of mine, stealing my

Is she here?

No, no. Oh, that's too bad.

I've heard a lot about her from Bill Holden. Oh, yeah.

I accused him of making a lot of it up.

Yeah, well, look, John, speaking of fans, I have a friend of mine that lives

next door here, and I... I think he's going to come over and ask for your

autograph. I hope you don't mind. Oh, absolutely not. I'm afraid of the day

won't want it. Well, I also have an awful hunch that he's going to try to

hands with you and try to find out how strong your grip is.

Oh, another one of those, eh?

Well, if he's a friend of yours, will you, Marie?

Ha!

John, this is Fred Mertz.

Howdy, partner.

How do you do?

I'm sorry.

You've got quite a grip there, fella. I used to box a little when I was little.

Fred,

don't press your luck, huh?

Hey, I forgot.

Would you sign my wife's autographed book for me?

Well, I'd be glad to. Here's a pencil. As soon as I can get some blood back in

this hand.

Rick, Ethel's going to flip when she sees this. Yeah, well, let's get going

the footprints.

We don't want to waste John's time. Thank you. Count, Duke.

I wore the same shoes I had on when I made this the first time. Oh, that's

great. Yeah, I guess put them right in there.

That's it.

Now we get the other one here.

That's it. Here, Rick.

I'll get out of all this. I'll take it.

I tell you what, we better get downstairs and get this booth shine,

right, Ray.

Now for the signature. Let's put it on the table, huh? All right.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. Don't stand yourself.

I'll handle that.

Kind of heavy.

That's all. Well, you might have let me take the curlers out of my hair.

You could. I can take the curlers in my hair now. For heaven's sake, I got a few

things on my... Oh, look.

Freddy the Forger strikes again.

No, the writing is different.

I think Ricky did this.

Well, nice try, but they'll never get away with it.

Oh, dear. What's the matter with those characters?

They can't forge a thing like this. Millions of people have seen this.

knows what John Wayne's signature looks like.

Look what I got for you, honeybunch.

What is it?

Good luck, John Wayne. Oh, Fred.

Oh, honestly, Fred.

I'm surprised you haven't started forging his name on checks.

What do you mean?

That's John Wayne's signature.

Oh, sure.

Hi.

Rick, they don't believe that's John Wayne's signature. Sure it is. He signed

while he was here a few minutes ago.

He was, he was, he was, he was, wow, wow, wow.

I thought you'd be surprised.

I don't believe it.

Sure, honey, he's down there in the lobby getting his boots shined. Yeah. He

them all day when he stuck the boots in his... No, no!

Yes.

All right.

All right.

Oh,

Lucy,

that was a great idea.

Gee, we not only get off the hook, but we get to meet John Wayne in person.

Right up here. Oh, John Wayne. Oh, I can hardly wait. He's so big and strong and

rugged.

He may be big and strong and rugged, but I'm bigger and stronger and ruggeder.

Oh, Fred, what are you babbling about?

They say he's got a grip like a vice. But he was like putty in the hands of

bone crusher Mertz. Oh, honestly, Fred, you're really gone.

Well, I mean it. When I gave him the iron grip, he went right down to his

Here, I'll show you.

This is your big chance to meet John Wayne. You have curlers in your hair.

the footprints.

You sit right over there, John. Oh, my.

You really got to put your footprints out there. This is so nice.

All of your pictures, you know, every single one of them. You know, when you

were up in that plane in the High and the Mighty, when your motor calmed down,

my motor calmed down right up.

That's real acting, you know, real, real acting. Lucy.

Lucy.

Lucy, get the... Lots of people who are wonderful, but you are the best. Get

Lucy there.

Get the pen for the signature, honey. Oh, oh, I'm going to keep this the rest

my life. Save me a piece.

We're really going to get this scene to a dislike.

Oh, what a...

Well, I'm getting to where I can do it faster each time.

Oh,

sense of humor.

Well, we better get back to the shoe shine. Oh, we really have to go. Yeah,

has to go.

John, I promise you, John, I promise you this will be the last time. Well, I'm

afraid it'll have to be. As much as I love stepping in wet cement, I'm afraid

I'll be late at the studio.

Isn't he a wonderful guy? He's great.

Well, all we have to do now is take the block off the man to promise Chinese and

everything is paid to now. Right, Lucy?

Lucy?

and know I'm here.

I suppose those things happen, partner.

It's okay.

Come in.

Is this okay to go on with, Mr. Wayne?

Looks okay to me.

Better check with Mr. Wellman. Thank you.

Hello.

Oh.

Your wife and her friend are at the gate.

I'll tell you what.

Pretend you're mad.

Pretend?

Let him stoop for a while and then we'll surprise him with it, you see. Tell him

no.

No. Absolutely not.

Absolutely not.

Don't bother me with a thing like that no more.

Don't bother me with a thing like that no more.

Ready for your up -down?

Oh, don't bother with that, George. Oh, yes, yes. This is the least I can do.

Ready on the set, Mr. Wayne, for the beach scene.

Okay. George, we'll have to wait till after this scene. Okay.

Sorry, Ricky, I'll have to get on the set. Sure, sure.

How can I ever thank you?

Make this the last time.

Okay, George, okay.

sure that'll work?

Listen, when Mr.

Wayne comes out of his dressing room, he must step down there. That way we will

have his footprints.

It's that simple. What about his signature?

Once we have his footprints, how can he refuse to sign?

I don't see how he can refuse to punch you right in the nose.

He came down here to get John Wayne's footprints again.

Ethel, we're saved.

The signature, it isn't touched, see?

All I have to do now is go in there, steal a pair of his boots, make the

imprints, and our troubles are over. Okay.

We'll get this stuff out of here. All right.

Well, give me five to ten minutes, will you? I want to get a rub down.

George?

Let's get on with the rubdown.

Hurry it up.

You've got all day.

Oh, cut that comedy, George. Get on with the rubdown.

stories lately, George?

Oh, I heard a beaut in the steam room the other day.

It seems it was this traveling salesman.

Couldn't find a hotel room in this town.

But he did find a farmer who had a beautiful daughter.

Hey, take it easy, will you?

It was raining outside.

It's the rain.

Yes. It's the rain. You're ready on the set.

They want you on the set. Okay.

George, I'm wanted on the set.

George!

Are you ready for your rope now?

You just get...

about you, George. You're getting punchy.

I don't know. I don't know. I just ran out of his dressing room and I was so

scared I just came on home. I don't know what happened to Ethel. Well, let's

just hope for the best.

Don't worry, Fred.

She'll show up. I said let's hope for the best.

Come in here.

I brought you a six -month supply.

The man with the poster was Louie Nicoletti, and the masseur was Ralph

Mr. Wayne's latest picture is Blood Alley, released through Warner Brothers,

soon to be seen in your local theater.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.

Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz will be back next week at the same time.