Original subtitles

Hiya, Fred.

Listen, did you call Jim and Mari?

Well, as soon as they get there, bring them up, huh?

Yeah, I'll have the television getting warm and the beer getting cold.

Yeah, we'll watch the game from up here.

What do you mean we'll upset Lucy?

Of course not.

Listen, Fred, there is nothing wrong with Lucy. She's just having a baby.

Why does everybody treat her like she's falling apart or something?

Okay, I'll see you in a few minutes. Bye.

I didn't know that was your chair.

What's the big idea?

I want to watch the ball game.

Oh, honey, you can't watch television up here today.

What do you mean I can't? Fred is coming out with a couple of the guys. Well,

I'm sorry. The girls are coming over. They're giving me a baby shower.

Oh, now, honey.

Now, dear, think of the baby. Think of all the nice things she'll get.

Well, think of me. I finally get an afternoon off and I can even sit in my

home and watch my own television, sir. Now, I am thinking of you. If it wasn't

for the baby shower, you'd have to pay for all that loot I'm going to get.

Well, it might be worth it.

Ricky Ricardo, you're jealous of the baby.

Oh, now, honey, don't be silly. Well, then you go down to Fred's and look at

game. Isn't it nice the girls are giving me a surprise shower?

Well, if it's a surprise, how do you know about it?

Well, how do you think every girl in the club called up and told me?

Every girl in the club called up and told you it was going to be a surprise?

Yeah. Yeah, they knew I'd hate it if they came over here to surprise me and

house was a mess and I had my hair up in curlers.

I want them to surprise me, but I don't want them to surprise me.

and I got stuck. Help me, will you?

Honey, come on.

My center of gravity has shifted a little.

Well, honey, after six months, you should have learned a few things that

do. Yeah, that's right.

Here, I'll take them off for you. Oh, thank you. You sit down and rest. No,

honey, I'm all right. Come on, I want you to sit down and rest. Sit down. Oh,

well, all right, but not in that chair, dear.

Well, honey, that's the most comfortable chair in the whole house. Yeah, I know

it's comfortable, but once I get into it, I can't get out of it.

Well, honey, I'm here to help you. Sit down. Be comfortable.

Well... Go ahead. Come on. All right.

There you are.

Oh, honey, would you take out that waste paper basket, too? Sure.

There's a few bottles under the sink that ought to go out, too, dear.

Thank you. We already subscribed to all the magazines we can use.

Thank you.

Hey,

what are you doing up? I thought you couldn't get up out of that chair.

Oh, well, I was wrong, dear. It was a cinch.

You better run along now. The girls will be here any minute.

Okay.

Say, uh, what am I supposed to do for lunch?

Honey, I just haven't got time to fix lunch for you. Gee, I forgot all about

you. Yeah, that's been happening a lot lately.

Oh, gosh, honey. That's all right, that's all right. I guess I can get Fred

rustle up something.

Well, that would be a lot. That must be the girls. Honey, go out the back way.

Go on, go out that way.

Isn't that cute? Did you notice these little shirts, Lucy?

Weren't the girls generous, Ethel? Oh, I'll say they were.

Oh, hi, Ricky. Look at all the wonderful things the baby and I got.

Oh, gee, that's swell.

Aren't they adorable?

Listen, honey, is dinner ready?

Oh, honey, I've been so busy.

I forgot.

Oh, honey, you know what time I have to get to work. Oh, yeah, well, I'll fix

something right away. Look at this. Isn't that cute? Yes, cute. Look at

honey. Oh, isn't that darling?

You made Winchell's Column. I did?

Yeah. Ricky Winchell, how wonderful.

Yeah, there's a whole item here about you. Oh, imagine me in Winchell's

Yeah.

Carrot Top Lucy Ricardo, formerly Lucy McKillicuddy, and currently one of show

business' most beautiful wives, is infanticipating.

Oh, isn't that wonderful? How about that?

It's a nice article about me.

I finished it here.

Read that.

Her husband is the bandleader.

That's wonderful, dear. Let me see. Look at you.

Lucy Ricardo.

Beautiful.

Infanticipating.

We'll have to cut that out and save it. It's the first time the baby's ever been

mentioned in print.

Hey, you'll have to start a scrapbook.

How about dinner, huh? That's a wonderful idea.

Baby scrapbook. How about dinner?

I would love that. I love people. Would you like some dinner, Ricky? Yeah, I'd

love some dinner.

Well, would you like?

I would like a nice big thick steak, juicy. Would you like some potatoes with

it? Yes, please. And put plenty of butter in the potatoes.

How about some onions, Ricky?

All right, all right, all right. I'll fix you something to eat. Would a nice

piece of rare roast beef make you feel better? I don't know.

Okay, coming right up. Okay.

Oh, gee, it was a wonderful shower.

Too bad you fellas couldn't be here.

Well, that's why to come. But I didn't have a thing.

I'll fix your supper. Goodbye, Ricky. Goodbye.

Would this be rare enough?

Oh, Lucy.

Well, I bought it. I just forgot to cook it, that's all.

Do you have anything else?

Uh, yeah. How would you like a nice, thick, juicy, delicious...

sandwich. No?

Well, the surprise shower threw me off schedule. I had a lot of things to do

today, Ricky.

You should see the list of things I had. Here, look.

Look at this.

Buy roast beef.

Well, congratulations.

Thank you.

Pick up Ricky's laundry.

I'm not?

Well, couldn't you stop by the laundry on your way to the club?

Pick up Ricky's stocks at Cleaners.

Well,

it's only a couple more blocks to the Cleaners.

I'd better get going. I got a lot of things to do.

you something.

Oh, don't worry about me. I'll get by. I'll eat.

I'll get something.

Somehow.

Somewhere.

And, uh... Has he ate it? Yes, and he has dizzy spells.

And he has pains in his stomach. Pains in his stomach?

Uh -huh.

I have a few minutes.

It must be something I ate last night. I see.

Yeah, well, I suppose it's my fault. I should have gotten you dinner, dear,

instead of having that silly shower.

Well... Hmm.

No temperature.

Mrs. Ricardo, do you mind if I talk to your husband alone for a moment?

Oh, not at all.

Is it serious, Doctor? Is it fatal?

Come on, tell me. I can take it. Go ahead.

Tell me, Ricky.

Have you been feeling neglected lately since your wife is going to have a baby?

Neglected? No, why?

Well, think of all your symptoms.

You say you have morning sickness, right?

Yeah. Pains in the stomach?

Yeah. Dizziness?

Yeah.

Don't you see, Ricky? They're exactly like the symptoms your wife has been

having lately.

I can definitely assure you, you are not going to have a baby. No kidding.

Now, for this, I got to pay you for a house call?

Now, come on, stop joking, will you? I'm not neglected. I'm sick.

I'm surprised you don't feel neglected.

Why, your wife even said she couldn't fix dinner for you last night because of

the baby show.

So, that didn't bother me. Listen, if I wanted to get upset, I got a hundred

things to get upset about.

She didn't pick up my laundry. My suits weren't clean.

I come home in an afternoon off, I can't even sit and watch the ball game.

you trying to say? That I'm sick because I'm feeling sorry for myself?

Well, not... Oh, come on, will you? That's the craziest thing I ever heard

my whole life.

I'm sick because I ate something.

It didn't land in the right place. It gave me a pain. It made me dizzy. That's

what made me sick.

That's the craziest double talk I ever heard in my life. Well, on second

thought, maybe I better have another look at you.

Oh.

Ah.

Yes, you definitely have to mean.

Well, that's more like it.

Hi, Lucy.

Hi. Did you find out what's the matter with Ricky yet? No, the doctor's still

there. Oh, doctor, what's the matter with him? Oh, it's nothing serious.

You know, Mr. Ricardo, sometimes when a wife is expecting, the husband develops

the same symptoms.

Really? Well, that seems strange.

Oh, no, it's not unusual.

At a time like this, when everybody's interest centers around the expected

child, the husband feels left out, neglected.

Oh, I don't think Ricky feels neglected.

Still, there was that baby shower yesterday.

Yeah, and you forgot to fix dinner for him.

Yeah, and I forgot to pick up his cleaning and his laundry, and he did act

of funny about that, didn't he? Exactly as I thought. You know, if there was

some way that you could figure out to make your husband the center of

I'm sure your troubles would be over.

Well, I'll call you later on, see how you're getting on.

Well, thank you, Dr. Radwin. Not at all. Good day, ladies. Bye.

Oh, bye -bye.

Now, how am I going to make Ricky the center of attention?

I don't know. Why don't you give him a baby shower?

Don't try to be funny. Try to help me.

Hey, you know, that's not such a bad idea as that, a daddy shower.

We could have the man come and give Ricky presents for the baby. Who could

it for him? Fred? Who else? Do you think he would? He'd love it. Come on, let's

go tell him. Okay.

What happened? What did he say? Did he like the idea? He's crazy about it. You

should have seen him perk up when I told him. He's practically well already. Oh,

that's wonderful.

Here's the list of fellas he wants me to invite.

Oh, Fred, I love you. Thank you.

Wow!

I love you too, Fred.

Wow.

I hate to leave this little loveless, but I'll see you later.

Okay, where are you going?

To the recreation club. I've got to make arrangements for our stag party. Oh.

Goodbye. So long, goodbye.

Oh, gee, won't they have fun?

Yeah.

Stag party?

What happened to the baby shower?

Oh, I guess... Fred'd feel kind of funny asking men to a baby shower, so he's

going to call it a stag party.

Oh.

Stag party, huh?

Well, it's still a baby shower.

It is?

Oh, now, Lucy, don't be silly. You want Ricky to get well, don't you?

Sure I want him to get well.

But I'd like to know what kind of medicine he's using.

When they call a party stag, it means only men are allowed.

It does?

Yeah.

Doesn't it?

Well, there's one good way to find out. How?

What if a couple of uninvited stags showed up?

Uninvited stags?

You mean... Yeah.

Oh, Lucy. We could disguise ourselves.

Even if we could disguise ourselves, they know everybody who's going to be

there. Well, now, just leave it to me. I'll think of something.

Sure.

Yes, sir.

Well, we'll be happy to have you.

Yeah, we'll come right over.

Okay, thank you. Bye.

Hey, Fred.

Yeah.

This is getting to be quite an affair.

Why? Well, you know who that was on the phone?

No. It's a reporter.

Yeah, he wants to be a photographer over, and they want to cover the first

shower. Well, that sounds interesting. What paper was it? He didn't say.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we make the society page?

Oh, boy.

I can see it now.

Fred Mertz poured last night.

for Ricky Ricardo and some of his most intimate slobs.

Well, here's the game.

Bring it up now, boys. Bring

it up.

Now, remember, this is a shower, and let's do it right.

Now, first, everybody put their presents on that table.

All right.

Right over here. Oh,

fellas.

Oh, gee whiz.

Oh, isn't that... Look, from Jerry.

Ah, yes. Oh, Jerry, you didn't have to do it. Oh, well, it was nothing, Rick.

This is what I always wanted. Oh, it was just a little something I thought you

could do.

Well, let's start opening the presents.

I see. What paper are you from?

The New York Times.

The New York Times.

Well, actually, it isn't generally known, but it's the New York Herald

Tribune.

Isn't that right, then?

Yeah, that's right, Pete.

Listen,

you make yourself at home. Will you pardon me for a minute?

Sure. ahead and take your shower. I mean, have your shower.

What are you saving kings for, fella?

because they're coming over to write up our daddy shower.

Oh, is that right?

Well, what do you like to know?

Well, now, whose idea was this here shower?

That was mine.

Oh, is that so, Mr. Murph? Yes, I said to my old battle axe, I said...

Why should the mothers get all the breaks?

Why don't we do something about the fathers?

You said that, huh? That's what I said, yeah.

You're looking for a story, are you? I sure am.

story for you, Pete.

Oh, well, go ahead. Yeah. Of course, you'd never be able to print this in a

newspaper, you know.

All right.

Well, you see, there was this fella.

He was a bachelor, sort of a man about time. And he goes into his nightclub in

Paris. Ah.

You say this whole thing was your idea, huh? Now, just a minute. Just a minute.

Will you just let the young man tell us? Go ahead. Yeah, let him tell the story.

Come back here, Pete.

Let me tell the story. Now, one night, He goes into this nightclub, see? And

this beautiful girl, can -can dancing, she's doing her act. She's dancing, see?

And this fellow walks right up on the stage.

See what I mean?

She's dancing, and he's right there in the middle of the stage. Now, do you get

the picture?

my best eye.

For another thing, you're the only man that I know that'd get his mustache on

with scotch tape.

Fred, how did you see through my disguise?

What disguise?

Well, we just wanted to see what went on at a stag party. Are you mad?

No, sweetheart, I'm not mad.

I got everything.

But if you don't stop having these silly cravings at four o 'clock in the

morning, I'm going to freeze to death.

Here. Is this pistachio?

Yeah, that's pistachio.

Here's your spoon.

Which is that?

Honey, these are sardines.

the other day because you weren't getting enough attention?

I was sick because I ate something that made me sick.

Yes, dear.

Well, I was.

Yeah. All right. You were.

Funny how you snapped out of it, though, and after the doctor told us what we

should do.

What do you mean?

Uh, nothing, dear.

Did the doctor tell you to give me the daddy shower just so I get some

attention? No.

No, he just said that if we, you know, kind of made you feel that... Well...

What's the matter?

I don't know. I feel kind of funny. Again?

by Jerry Hausner and Dr. by Lou Merrill.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.

This is the CBS Television Network.