Original subtitles

Bye.

even sounded good.

Thank you.

You know, a little more practice and we could do singing commercials for

television.

Gee, Ethel, you certainly play the piano wonderfully.

Oh, thanks, Lucy.

Hey, how about Sweet Sue? Yeah, that has a nice harmony.

Wait a minute, Ethel. It's 2 o 'clock in the morning.

Well, what about it, honey? Yeah, yeah, 2 o 'clock's a perfect time for Sweet

Sue. Yeah, I mean, it's a little late. Won't the other tenants complain?

About what?

We're not making noise. We're making music.

Yeah. Let them phone the landlord. I'm not home.

I always forget to hear the landlord.

Come on. Besides, what's wrong with good friends harmonizing a little? That's

what the world needs more of. You're right.

Oh, it's so wonderful to have landlords like you two.

What a break for us to have tenants like you two. Well, okay, okay, sweet suit.

Look at this place, Lucy. You've taken such... Good care of it. We could rent

tomorrow and not have to change a thing.

Okay, okay, sweet Sue.

You know why, Ethel? It was in such wonderful condition when we moved in.

Well, all right, all right, I guess. Now, sweet Sue.

You're the nicest tenant I ever had.

And you're certainly the nicest landlady I've ever had. Man, this is the most

sickening conversation I've ever heard.

You're so right.

that you and i and fred and ethel are fated to go through life together hey

ethel left her rings here oh yeah you know honey she's absolutely right people

ought to do more singing in this world that's right honey yes sir they sure

should sing everybody sweet shoe every star above

knows

Oh, no, honey, it couldn't be. No, I guess not.

with Ethel. She must have walked downstairs too fast and gotten the

What? Well, she's a little grumpy because we're making noise.

Well, I thought she was coming. Well, so did I. She'll be over it in the

morning. Come on, honey. Let's go to bed. All right.

Don't cry.

94,

95,

96, 97, 98, 99, 100.

How do you expect people to get me sleep?

Well, I was only closing the windows.

What, with a sledgehammer?

Now, listen, Fred.

Listen, my foot.

Now, let's have it quiet up there.

How do you like that?

Let's have it quiet up there, he says.

Some lousy landlord they are.

Good night, honey.

Somebody should get up and fix it.

Yes.

Somebody should.

Well?

Well?

This isn't getting us any place.

We'll both get up and fix it. Wow.

That's the only fair way. When I count to three, we'll both jump out of bed.

All right.

You ready?

Ready. Okay.

One.

As far as I'm concerned, that shower can drip all night. I just don't care. I

won't pay any attention to it. All right, neither will I. All right.

That movement.

I left my diamond rings on your piano last night.

Yes, you did, Mrs. Mertz. I'd be very happy to get them for you. Oh, don't

bother. I'll get them.

If they're still there.

I don't know why you should worry. You can always buy another box of Cracker

Jack.

I'll have you know these are real diamonds.

Ha!

Mrs. Ricardo.

Would you be so kind as to inform me just when we are to be deprived of your

charming company?

Very shortly. Good.

Thank you.

My, it'll certainly be nice getting away from such disagreeable people.

It certainly will.

Would you like to give me the check for the next five months' rent now?

Of course. I'd be delighted.

What do you mean, the next five months' rent?

Well, if you're leaving, you have to pay off your lease.

Our lease?

Yes, don't you remember? You begged me on bended knee to give you a lease, just

so that no one else could have this fantastically inexpensive, lovely

Oh, you mean that one -sided, unfair, binding contract?

we fumigate.

You can leave the check in my mailbox.

Honey,

I don't seem to be able to... Oh, shut up!

What's the matter with you? Oh, I'm sorry. Ethel was just up here and she

me so darn mad.

What now? She says they're going to hold us to our lease. We have to give them

five months' rent before we can leave.

I guess we're stuck here.

Well, now, that all depends.

On what?

On whether we can break the laser net.

Do you think we can?

Could be.

What's on your mind?

We are going to become the two most unpleasant, disagreeable, nasty people

the whole world.

But how?

We'll force ourselves.

How? Boy, let's see now. What can we think of that'll make them kick us out?

at least yet. Now, remember, when you come home tonight, make a lot of noise.

Oh, that reminds me. I won't be home till late tonight, honey. Why?

Well, we have to rehearse for a couple of hours after the club closes.

Ricky, why don't you have the rehearsal here?

Honey, are you crazy? I got a 16 -piece band. I'll blow the roof off the joint.

Well, doesn't look like rain.

I'll do it.

Fred and Ethel are enjoying it. Well, they have a lot of courage. I haven't

heard a peep out of them. Oh, boy, this is swell.

Honey, what are all these people? I don't know, but the more, the noisier.

All right, we'll dedicate the next number to Fred and Ethel Mertz. Hey! All

right. Fred and Ethel Mertz? Yes, our lovely landlord. They won't hear this.

They're still down in the street. Down in the street?

Yes, they have a big sign that says jam session tonight. Ricky Ricardo in

person. And they're selling tickets.

Oh, no!

Hold outside.

Oh. They sold us the last ticket. Oh, they're back in their apartment, are

Well, we'll dedicate the next number to Fred and Ethel Mertz. An old Cuban folk

dance called El Breco the Liso.

El Breco the Liso? Yes. How does this old Cuban folk dance go?

good to get out of this joint, won't it? Yeah. Did you tell Ethel we were moving

today? Well, I haven't seen her since she brought up the lease.

I mailed her a note telling her to come up and get the keys today.

What shall I do about this?

What is it?

It's a picture of us and Fred and Ethel taking an Atlantic Cedar last summer.

Oh.

We sure had a lot of fun there, didn't we?

Yeah.

What shall I do? Throw it away? Oh, no. No, I better pack it.

Huh? Well, we can always cut them out with the scissors.

Where are all these things at?

Oh, there's some things I borrowed from Ethel. She has a lot of my things, too,

if she hasn't sold them.

You know, I got a lot of tools that belong to Fred.

Some of them we bought together.

What shall I do with those?

I don't know.

Gee, it's amazing we could have been such good friends with a couple of

stinkers. Yeah.

We sure had a lot of fun in the last nine years.

Until they show their true colors.

Yeah.

Well, I just... shows you how sneaky they are.

Here, honey, you want some paper for that?

These are yours, I guess.

Thanks.

Here's some things of yours that somehow got into my apartment.

Thanks.

There's some of your things that I managed to get hold of.

It's all there. You can count it if you like.

Oh, well, that won't be necessary, Mrs. Mertz.

I trust you.

It doesn't matter to me, you know.

But for some crazy reason or other, I think Lucy wants to stay.

Don't you, Lucy?

Well,

it doesn't matter to me either, but it's up to Ethel. What do you say, honey?

said.

I guess we're staying, eh? Yeah.

Only this time I want a long lease so that we don't ever get kicked out.

Well... Fred.

Well, what do you know? I just happen to have a new lease already made out.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.