Original subtitles

'So someone snatched an endangered Black Leopard.'

Since I bet that cat's worth some serious scratch..

I'd say that narrows our list of suspects considerably

to, oh, lemme count, one.

This wasn't Catwoman.

Really? This totally purrs Catwoman.

Just because she's a cat burglar

doesn't mean she's a cat thief.

'Look at the number of footprints.'

This wasn't a solo job.

Hey, you ought to consider doing this for a living.

I also doubt it's a coincidence

that the only other leopard of its kind in captivity

arrives in Gotham tomorrow

as part of Amazing Leslie's Animal Extravaganza.

So, when do I get to say, "Told you so?"

It's okay, pretty kitty.

Aw.

Now, handsome, this isn't what it looks like.

Oh, lemme guess it involves space aliens

and a road trip to Fresno?

Hm, couldn't find a babysitter?

Good one, where's the other leopard?

I didn't steal the other leopard

but I am going to steal this one.

Since you two missed the show tonight..

'...here's your chance to catch The Wrestling Gorillas.'

Sorry, fellas.

Whoosh.

Meow.

Kitty doesn't have time to play, little one.

Thud thud.

- Oh. Not bad. - Just wait till I start trying.

Ah!

'Playtime's over.'

Come on, precious.

Hello... kitties.

Joker?

Ugh!

Twisted dreams.

Well, looks like we're back to my theory.

- Catwoman stole the leopards. - I'm not so sure.

I found a strand of hair.

Okay.

It's green.

I never pegged you for a cat person, Joker.

Me? I despise the mangy beasts.

You see, I snatched these kittens

for a recent business acquaintance.

Mr. Killgore Steed.

The Killgore Steed?

That creep hunts endangered species on his private island.

Well, in exchange for those leopards.

Killgore has promised to deliver me the real cat's meow!

You're lucky I'm tied up.

Bringing us back to the subject

I've always been told there's more than one way

to skin a cat.

Whoosh.

A true classic!

'Of course, I tweaked the punchline a smidge.'

'Modern audiences like their humor'

'with a little more... bite!'

And here I thought curiosity killed the cat.

Crash.

My heroes.

Clank vroom vroom vroom

crash

thud thud thud.

Help her.

Bang

bang bang crash.

Come on, boys.

The cats.

Come on, we need to go get those cats.

Uh, we?

You're after the pound, Catwoman.

Let's not be hasty, handsome.

Do you know where Joker's headed?

Hm, didn't think so.

Well, I do..

And if we don't hunt them down toot sweet

someone else will.

You're not falling for this?

Lead the way.

Catwoman leading the way

isn't that like calling in Penguin for backup?

'Land, ho! Ho-ho-ho.'

Let's collect my booty, boys.

For years, Killgore Steed's been getting his kicks

by hunting the rarest of the rare.

Wild animals belong in the wild.

Not in cages, not wearing silly costumes

and especially not being hunted.

You're pretty hardcore about this.

Hm, animals are what make me purr.

When you're not hunting jewels.

Always the sourpuss.

I bet he never lets you drive.

He barely lets me sidekick.

Knock, knock.

Evening, Joker.

You're supposed to say "Who's there?"

You've done well.

Hm. Manly decor.

My trophies.

Each and every one imported to my island.

So I can hunt them within my... private safari.

Ah!

'What an amazing maze!'

Adds to the thrill of the hunt, it would seem.

In you go, kitties.

I believe you have something for me.

Ahh!

They're gorgeous.

Albino Hyenas, the rarest of the rare.

Think they look like their pa?

Ooh! I-I wanna be sure the pups have a good sense of humor.

And how do you determine that?

With a joke, of course.

They know funny.

I know your heart was set on the cat hunt..

But would it upset you much if it was a cat and two bats?

If they've done anything to those cats

I will scratch their eyes out.

You almost sound like you're going hero on us.

Hey, for the right cause.

You should give it a try, you might actually

make a good-good guy.

I'd need a sidekick.

And with a few costume adjustments

you're not too far from being a Catgirl.

Killgore's compound is supposed to be littered with traps.

'Now hold those poses.'

That's how I want you to look

when you're stuffed and mounted on my wall.

- What's your game, Joker? - The three of you, of course.

But before we play, there are few simple ground rules.

'Nuh-ah-ah!'

Rule number one, no gadgets

or the pretty kitties take the express train..

'...from endangered to extinct.'

No.

Clank

clang clang clang.

My own Bat and Cat toys.

Why are you doing this?

'Cause my growing boys here need fresh meat

'and plenty of it.'

'Ooh, lookie, a rare poisonous arachnid wants to join the fun.'

Well, the more the merrier.

'Off you go, Legs McGee.'

'Now, on your mark!'

'Get set..'

Run for your lives.

Crash.

Just a little something to help keep our eyes' on the prizes.

Moss, too slippery to climb.

Thud

bam

thud

screech.

Oh, boys!

Dinner is served.

Can't bear to look.

Come on.

Cut it out, that tickles.

Boys! Sic her! She's a cat!

What kind of crazy canines are you?

Sorry to burst your balloon, Joker

but hyenas are more closely related to cats than dogs.

Oh, and, by the way, they're laughing at you.

Well, I'm gonna have the last laugh.

Hyah!

Whoosh whoosh whoosh

bam.

Time to find the others.

Ugh!

Bang.

Huh!

'Roadmap to Catwoman.'

Hyah!

Joker-brand Catnip will give you a Cheshire grin.

Not if I can help it.

You busted my boutonniere.

You're lucky that's all.

Shut up.

Aah... ha!

Take this.

Find the cats.

'Biometrics, Joker.'

What are you, eh, prattling on about, Batsy?

It only opens for me.

Then I'll just belt you one!

Bam.

Momma's here, babies.

Looks like "Smiley" could use some joker gas antidote.

Let's get these leopards back to their owners.

Oh, yeah, about that.

Smack.

Ow, hey!

Sorry, kid, but I've taken a shine to these darlings.

And seriously, if you ever decide to make the switch

from sidekick to partner-in-crime..

I'll be sure to look you up.

Uh! Here, kitty-kitty, come on!

Ugh! What are you waiting for? Come on!

You of all people should know cats don't like water.

Or being caged.

Always the sourpuss.

Can't believe I thought there was some good in her.

I should've warned you about her tricks.

She's a sly one.

I guess leopards don't change their spots.

You know, it was your instinct

not to trust her in the first place.

That mean you'll keep me?

You make a better Batgirl than a Catgirl.

Good... never was much of a cat person anyway.