Original subtitles

And now, I Love Lucy.

Well.

Fred, are you sure this is the right hotel?

Well, it signs that Hotel Grande.

Well, it is kind of picturesque.

Why did you bring us to this picturesque dump?

So it's not the Astor.

And as long as I'm Ricky's band manager, I'm supposed to save money.

Well, that's right, Fred. So ring for Conrad Hilton.

Boy,

I sure hope our mail catches up with us. I haven't heard from Mother in two

weeks. Well, Ricky's gone around to pick up the mail at the American Express

office. He'll probably bring you a whole slew of it. Oh, he better.

Today's little Ricky's third birthday. I don't even know if he got my birthday

presents or not. Oh, he'll get the presents all right. I mailed them a

weeks ago.

Oh, brother, if you mail them, he'll be lucky if he gets them for his 23rd

birthday. Will you get off of my back?

Where is everybody?

Even the owner won't stay around this old trap.

Now, just a minute. It may be a little old, but it's cheap.

Well, that makes two of you.

Buongiorno, buongiorno.

Good morning.

I'm Fred Mertz. I wired for reservations.

Hey, Signore Mertz. I'm the Signore Nicoletti.

Welcome to the Grand Hotel.

Thank you. Are our rooms ready?

Yes, ma 'am. What a room.

Shine,

ma 'am. Not now, kid. Not now. Hey! What did I tell you? Go away. Go away.

He's cute, isn't he? Yeah.

Well, let's take a look at our rooms. All right.

Excuse me, ma 'am.

She's a new worker.

Who's a new worker?

She's a new worker. She's a bust.

The whole idea of coming here, she's a bust.

All right, all right.

How far?

She's a full flight up.

Four flights?

Come, come.

best room in the hotel.

The bridal suite.

How you like, eh?

out last week and it wasn't as bad.

That elevator, she's an old bus. She's a poot.

The very best place in the hotel.

The bridal suite.

The bridal suite. I hope the people around here marry while they're young.

Where's our room?

She's one flight up.

One flight up?

What'd you give her? the bridal suite for mountain goats?

Come on, Uncle.

No, you go ahead. I got to stay at this level for a while or I'll get the bends.

If you need anything, just call me up. I'll grab you.

Thank you very much.

Well, guess I'll take a look at that wonderful view he was talking about.

Oh, it is pretty out there.

Hi.

You can say that again.

raise your son? Oh, he's trying to save money. Did you get the mail, honey?

Yeah.

Anything for me?

Yeah.

There's a box of frames without a spring.

Four letters from Mother.

Oh, good. We'll come with mail first.

Ethel, you ought to see our room. There's a flock of pigeons right outside

window.

aren't pigeons up there. They're angels.

Here. Oh, thanks.

Oh, dear.

What's the matter, honey?

Little Ricky has a bad cold and mother's kept him out of nursery school for

three whole days.

Well, honey, you know how kids are. They all get colds. He'll be all right. You

sound just like a father. They all get colds. He'll be all right. He'll be all

right. Oh, wonderful.

What does that letter say?

It says he's all right.

has to say.

Ah, she collected the rents for last month. Good girl.

And she says, the furnace broke down last Monday and there was no heat all

The repairman finally fixed it yesterday and I'm enclosing the bill.

$118?

Is she off her nuts?

Oh, dear.

What's the matter now? Mother doesn't say a thing about the birthday presents

sent. Well, you know how your mother is. She always forgets to tell you things.

Oh, no, honey. Honey, she wouldn't forget to tell me that. He just didn't

them, the poor little thing.

Fred, are you sure you mailed those birthday presents? Yes, I'm sure I

those birthday presents.

Poor baby all alone in New York on his birthday. No birthday presents.

He'll think nobody loves him. Oh, now, honey, come on.

Hey, I tell you what.

We'll call New York and you can talk to him. Right now, honey? Sure. Oh, thank

you. Where's the phone?

I saw one downstairs in the lobby. Come on, let's get the call.

lot easier coming down these steps than going up.

Long distance, please.

Long distance?

No, long distance.

Longa distanza.

I want to make a long distance call.

Oh, they're switching me to an operator that speaks English.

Hello? Hello, long distance?

This is Mrs. Ricky Ricardo. I'd like to place a collect call to New York City,

New York.

It's in New York.

Well, just a minute, please.

She doesn't get a word I'm saying, and she's supposed to understand English.

What'll I do?

Let me try it. You!

Never mind.

Hello, operator.

Mrs. Ricardo would like to place a telephone call to New York City.

Murray Hill 5, 9099.

This is Palacio, 2905.

Thank you.

You have any trouble understanding me?

Just my luck, I'd have to get an operator in Italy who studied English in

Never mind.

What was that?

Yeah. Oh, fine. Thank you very much. What?

She said she'll call you back in 20 minutes. Oh.

Come on, let's unpack.

Okay.

What'd she say?

She said, what is that number again?

Marie 05 -9099.

Yes. How long will it be?

Thank you.

She doesn't know.

Well, thank you very much.

There's a one -hour delay.

Come

on,

honey. Come on. Oh, my.

Your legs won't make it. Yeah, come on, baby.

We can rest now for a while.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Just ask him what it is, will you? Ask him what's the matter.

Buongiorno. Buongiorno.

Buongiorno.

Buongiorno.

Well, I... Yeah,

well, yeah, I'm going to use it.

Operator, I'd like Palazzo 8000.

Hello? I'd like to speak to Benjamin Franklin, please.

Me no speak italiano.

È per me. Grazie, grazie.

Pronto? E cosa vuoi? Questa signora mi sta sempre alle spalle. Non si vuole

andare da torno.

Sì.

È una testolina rossa.

Un 'americana pazza.

Però quando vieni, sai, me lo fai sapere.

Cato, sta bene?

Sta bene?

Va bene, si.

Allora, cara, aspetto un tuo telefono. Va bene.

Ciao, ciao.

Arrivederci.

Ciao, ciao.

Hello?

Yes, operator, this is Mrs. Ricardo.

Yes, I forgot the difference. It's 5 o 'clock in the morning there.

Oh, that's right. Oh, Mother, I'm sorry I woke you up. I called to wish the baby

a happy birthday.

Well, dear, I'll wake him up. Oh, no. No, Mom, don't do that. He'd be so

Is he all right?

Yes, dear, he's fine.

Did he get the presents I sent him? Yes, they're all here waiting for him.

Oh, wonderful. He got them. Well, it's nice talking to you, Mother.

Will you kiss the baby for me?

And kiss him for me.

This is Fred Murth.

Is the furnace working all right?

Yes, it's nice and warm here.

At 5 o 'clock in the morning?

He'd be so sleepy he wouldn't understand or anything.

But I did so want to talk to him.

Oh, honey.

Well, look.

Why didn't you call him a few hours later and then you talked to him? I

call him again.

Honey, when you call him, would you tell him I'm sorry?

Come here.

Thank you. I'll have my shine a little later. Oh, gracias, senora. It's all

right. Senora, you make a big mistake.

You give the boy the money, he no come back no more.

Oh, well, that's all right. That's okay.

Fine. Thank you.

Hello? Hello, mother?

Lucy, is that you?

Yes, mother, it's me.

Where are you, dear? I'm still in Italy.

May I talk to the baby, please?

Oh, he's not here.

I wanted to talk to him.

I serve you. Come on.

Why do you cry, senora?

Well, I'm lonesome for my little boy back in America.

It's his birthday today.

He looks something like you.

See?

Of course, he's much younger.

Look, since I can't be with my little boy today, is it all right if I

your birthday with you?

Isn't that amazing?

What happens amazing is the fact that you fell for it. Oh, Fred, you're such a

cynic. Don't pay any attention to him. He thinks everybody in the world thinks

just like he does.

Come in.

I got a wonderful idea.

I'm going to have a party for little Ricky right here in Italy.

You tell the kids to wait here. Come on, we got some shopping to do. Oh, okay.

is a Desilu production.

Read all about Lucy and Desi in the current issue of Look Magazine.