Original subtitles

Hi, girl. I just saw your mother and little Ricky on the way to the park

Isn't it wonderful? They can go outside every day in California.

What are you doing?

Writing in my trip diary.

Let's see now. Friday, we went to Farmer's Market.

Saw Robert Taylor squeezing oranges.

Yeah, some oranges have all the luck.

Wait till the girls back home see the orange I have that Robert Taylor

He's got his autograph to prove it. Yeah, wasn't he cute when he said he'd

signed an orange before?

Too bad you didn't get him to autograph something more permanent. You'll have to

throw that orange away eventually.

Never! That orange and I are going to grow old and wrinkled together.

How many movie stars does that make we've seen?

Well, let's see now.

I've got them all right back here.

Eighty -four.

Ninety -nine!

We just need one more to make a hundred.

Oh, hi, Apple. Hi, Rick.

Hey, Lucy.

Listen to this item in Sheila Grimm's column.

A well -known star has been ordered by the doctor to get away from it all and

has taken a room at one of our local hotels.

I wouldn't give away the secret hiding place, but the hotel's first name is

Beverly.

Beverly. I'll bet that movie star is hiding right here at the Beverly Palm.

Or the Beverly Hills Hotel or the Beverly Wilshire Hotel.

Well, our chances are one out of three.

Let's see now. Well -known star.

I wonder who it is.

I just gotta find out.

Why is it such a matter of life and death?

Because we've already found 99 movie stars since we came to Hollywood, and we

need one more to make an even hundred.

Oh, hi, Bobby. Hi, Miss Ricardo.

Oh, Miss Ricardo, I brought up the trade papers. You got a mention today.

Variety, page 8, column 3. I circled it. Thank you.

Well, I'll say that's real service.

Oh, I'm always looking for items about guests here in the hotel.

Oh, say, Bobby, I'll bet you'd know.

What's that? About that item in Sheila Graham's column. Is some movie star

hiding out in this hotel?

I don't know anything about it. Not much you don't.

No, honest, I haven't the slightest idea who's up in the penthouse.

The penthouse! I was right! Who is it, Bobby? Who is it? No, no, no, I've said

too much already.

Oh, come on. Now, Bobby, all we want to know, is it a man or a woman?

Oh, come on, Bobby. You can trust us. We're your friends. Yeah.

Come on. All we want to know is, is it a man or a woman?

Now, the manager's not going to allow us to discuss him. Then it's a man.

Oh,

come on, Bobby.

All right,

girls. All right, girls.

Lay off of him. Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?

Won't you tell him anything that you're not supposed to? I won't.

Come on, I'll convoy you to the door.

Thank you, Mr. Ricardo. If anybody finds out that Cornel Wilde is here... Cornel

Wilde is right here at our hotel.

Oh, well, I can always get a job at the new Beverly Hilton.

Oh, you're super safe with us. Sure, sure.

Cornel Wilde, right up there in that penthouse. Boy!

All we have to do now is figure out how to get a look at him. Whoop -a -boo!

a -puffing about.

Now, we're going to nip this thing in the butt right now.

Cornel Wilde came here to get away from people, remember?

I don't want to bother him. All I want to do is see him.

Oh, well, that I can arrange.

You can?

Sure. Oh, you know him from the studio.

Will you really arrange so I can see him? Sure.

Tonight we'll go see his new picture, the big combo. Got wonderful reviews.

Oh, you know what I mean. I want to see him up close.

All right. We'll sit in the front row.

do this to me. One of the biggest movie stars in Hollywood is right over my

head, under my nose.

Now, look, you see, I've got a message for you. Well, slip it under the door.

I'll read it later.

I'm telling you, I want you to forget that he's up there. Forget?

Trying to hear Cornell Wild up there.

Oh, any luck?

No. If he's walking around, he's wearing bunny fur scuffies.

I got another idea cooking, though. I'll bet you have. I told Bobby to bring

some ice water up here. When he gets up here, I'm going to ask him if he could

possibly tell me just when he goes in and out. Lucille! What?

I hate to point this out, but Ricky told you to just forget that Cornell Wild is

up there. Well, for once in my life, I'm not going to do what Ricky tells me.

For once in your life,

you never do what he tells you. So why spoil a perfect record?

Oh, I can't keep up with you.

Here's your ice water.

Won't you bring it in, Bobby?

Would you set it on the coffee table, please?

Bobby?

Miss Ricardo, I'm pretty busy.

Bobby, I just want to ask a little favor of you. The answer is no. Bobby, all I

want to know is when he goes in or out so I can take a little peek at him. He

doesn't come in, he doesn't go out. He just stays there.

Oh.

Look, please let me go.

I've got to take this up to you -know -who right now.

Why don't you give up, Lucy? Because I've just got to see him.

Well, I'm sorry, Miss Ricardo, but the only person who's allowed in to see him

is me.

Now, he came here for a rest.

And the manager says if there are any calls from... that I am the... Oh,

no, not that.

Let me borrow your outfit, Bobby.

Absolutely not. Bobby, all I want to do is take the paper up, wrap on the door.

When he opens the door, I'll hand him the paper, and I'll take a little look,

and I'll slam the door, and he'll never know the difference. That's absolutely

impossible. Bobby.

Bobby, I'd hate to have to tell the manager that you were the one who

all over town that Cornell Wilde was dead.

Stung by a bee.

Bobby, let me borrow your outfit. No, ma 'am. Bobby. Miss Ricardo. Bobby. Miss

Ricardo. Bobby. But please!

Keep your eyes peeled.

Turn around, quiet.

Be quick on the draw.

One shot, there ain't no more.

do you hate me?

I don't hate you. Then why are you trying to get me fired?

Mr. Wilde doesn't like his newspaper wet.

I am not trying to get you fired, Bobby. It's just that I want to see him. Well,

just keep me out of it.

Whose lunch is that?

Nobody's.

This one's so wet, you can read one page right through the other. Yeah, well,

I'm sorry about that.

For a minute, I thought President Eisenhower was playing golf with Little

Annie. Uh,

where would you like the table set, sir? Oh, I guess over here is fine.

All right.

I'll just sign that note.

Yes, sir.

I'll put your tip on there, too, Bobby. Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you.

Mr. Wilde, you finished with your lunch?

Yeah, all set, thank you.

Okay.

What's the matter, Bobby?

Sometimes the wheel's sticking.

Sorry to get it in the shin.

Sorry, sir. I'm very close to the day.

Hey, Bobby.

Yes, sir. I seem to be all out of ink. Do you know where there's any more

here? Oh, there should be some in the desk. Let's see.

There you are, sir. Oh, thank you very much.

Anything else?

No, fine. That's all. Thank you. Okay, sir.

I'm just talking to myself.

I do it all the time.

My mother worries about me.

Yeah, but I... I heard two different voices.

Well, there couldn't have been two voices when I'm the only one here. See?

Oh, I get it. Well, I never expected it of you, Bobby. What?

Trying to audition.

Well, I guess everybody wants to get in the show business.

Where did you ever learn ventriloquism?

Ventriloquism? Well, I don't know... Oh!

Ventriloquism. Oh, yeah. Well, I don't do it very well.

Oh, what I heard sounded darn good. Sounded just like a voice coming from

the cart.

Well, that's not too hard.

Do it again.

No, I'd rather not. Oh, come on. Go ahead.

Yeah, go ahead, Bobby. Do it again.

Bobby, that's absolutely marvelous.

I didn't even see your lips move.

Well, it takes practice.

Yeah, I've got to go now. Oh, no, don't go. Do some more. No, don't go, Bobby.

Do some more. Ah, I saw your lips move inside.

Well, I've really got to go now.

No, go ahead and go, but leave me here.

Bobby, that's fantastic.

You're the best ventriloquist I've ever seen. Thank you.

It was warm.

Could I have a sip of your water? Oh, sure. Go ahead.

I'm going to make a note and call my agent and tell him about you.

Well, I wouldn't want you to get into so much trouble. It's no trouble at all.

I'll be doing him a favor. You're sensational.

Well, if he is interested, he can call me here at the hotel.

Okay, I'll have him call you here. Okay, thank you, sir.

Hey,

Bobby. Yes, sir.

Just do that little voice for me once more, will you?

Okay.

We have to go now.

Say goodbye.

I could have sworn your voice was coming from behind the couch.

Yeah.

I can't believe it. I've got to hand it to you, Bobby. I'm certainly going to

tell my agent. Yeah, well, thank you, sir.

Thank you, sir.

Wonderful.

I won't forget to tell him, Bobby. No, no, I thank you. I know.

Well, goodbye.

Thank you.

balcony. Locked out on the balcony?

Shh, be quiet. I'll explain later. Is Ricky there?

No. Good, I want you to help me down.

Help you down?

Yeah, I figured a way to lower myself over the side and I want you to pull

around the hotel somewhere.

You can say that again.

Uh, what's new, Rick?

What's the matter with you, Ethel? Oh, nothing. If Lucy isn't here, I'd like to

listen to what's happened to you because you've been so nice to me, Ricky. I

wouldn't even be in California if it wasn't for you and your career.

But you'd like to know about a new cake.

You take a cup of butter for their cake.

Okay, I'll come.

You want some cream in your coffee?

No, just black. Listen,

honey, I'm up in Cornel Wilde's apartment.

You're what?

I'm up in Cornel Wilde's apartment and I want you to come up and meet him.

Are you sure this is Ricky?

Yes, honey.

You see, you were so nice about not bothering him that I want to give you a

reward. Oh.

Now, you see how well things work out when you do what I tell you?

Next week, I Love Lucy will be brought to you by Lilt Home Permanence.

The bellboy was played by Bobby Jellison and Cornell Wilde portrayed himself.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.

Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz will be back next week at this same time.