Original subtitles

Birthdays! Ruin!

Vandalized!

Tonight, on Cybersnoot, I reveal the culprit.

Beware, the Mutant Minute!

Mutant Minute?

Oh my gosh, they're talking about us! I can't believe we're getting blamed for

this. Virtually everything in there was somebody else's fault.

I think.

So unfair.

Although it is a boost for my emotionally unavailable bad boy image.

You know.

Look, guys.

I think this might be an opportunity to turn a dark cloud into a silver lining.

Hey, you fellas ever read this fine piece of literature?

Horrible Wolfie the Harmless Wolfpup? Yes.

It's the touching story of a kid wolf who shows up at a town full of humans

all want to run him through with a pitchfork.

That's supposed to be touching.

But Wolfie didn't run away.

He performed loving deeds for the hateful town folk, and they welcomed him

their hearts. So that's what we'll do. We'll get in our giant tank and we'll

smash people in the face with good deeds.

Yeah, we are good doers. Oh, this is going to look great on my college

application.

Any votes for staying home during the anti -mutant panic?

No? Okay.

Let go.

Now, each time we do a good deed...

we'll leave behind one of our friendly calling cards. This good deed brought to

you by the quote -unquote Mutant Minute.

Winky face.

Ha -ha. Who wouldn't love this?

Uh -huh.

Ah!

Oh, Kitty needs to go with Toy.

We're good doers. And what do good doers do?

They good do. And they good do it well.

New York is going to Adora.

In local news, a team of heartless pranksters does a quote unquote mutant

evil wiki fan.

Are wreaking havoc across the city.

We go live to unpaid e -reporter Cyber Sleuth. The fire rages.

It's for its life.

A Maltese is trapped in concrete.

What do these tragedies have in common?

The horrible villain's called the Mutant Menace.

What? We called ourselves the Mutant Menace as a joke.

That's why we use the just kidding quote and the just kidding winky face. Raph,

you know I love you. But people don't focus on punctuation when they're stuck

concrete. There's something familiar about that despised voice.

No doubt you're wondering who I am.

I am none other than Boy Genius Baxter Stockboy!

What? Baxter Stockboy?

I am not looking forward to whatever that highly skilled underachiever has in

store for us.

I never fear New York. I will expose these monsters for what they are.

I have been tracking them from the stocking shop blimp.

He's tracking us? Hey, we look like a giant turtle.

Yeah, everybody was saying, go delve.

We can't let anyone see us. We need to get home muy rapido.

What the... It's them!

The mutant menace!

Shut up!

You know, you don't normally see pitchforks in midtown Manhattan.

Oh, mama, people are getting rustic out there.

We were trying to be nice to them.

Have they never read Horrible Wolfie? Ah, force shields down 50%. Wait a

we have force shields?

We do not.

You shall not!

Stuck in something.

No brakes.

No steering.

Daddy, what's going on?

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Okay. Good news, guys. My engineering's fine. Oh, and something's taking control

of the turtle tank. Look out!

We can't keep this up forever. Those rockets have limited fuel.

Crap. I knew being nice to people would get us in trouble.

Cello. Mikey, we do not cello the enemy.

Yeah,

we don't have any money and we get by just fine.

Yeah, yeah.

YEAH!

Three minutes to the reveal of the mutant menace!

What do we do? What do we do? What do we do?

We send this gas ba -

We're out of jet fuel. We're out of bowling balls. And we're going to be

to New York smelling like the inside of this tank.

Relax, Leo. We still have nature's bowling ball. Me.

Publicity stunt.

Total scam.

I spent $60 on pitchforks for nothing.

Baxter Stockboy, we're taking you in for unlicensed advertising, causing mass

hysteria, and driving a blimp without a learner's permit.

All right, take him to Kid Genius Jail. Mark my words, this isn't the last

you've heard of Baxter Stockboy!

Well, I guess we'll never get people to accept us for being good doers like

Wolfie. Maybe not, Mikey.

But we'll keep trying.

Because we're the quote -unquote mad dogs!

Winky face!

Hey, uh, Raph, did you ever finish reading your book here? Because turns

after the villagers accept Wolfie into their hearts, he eats them all.

I gotta start reading stuff to the end.